Chapter Text
A.N. - 12:06a.m.
Ness hated the concept of Death Cast. He hated the thought that people knew all of the details of his upcoming death, whereas he would only know the latter.
He had long accepted the fact that he, as well as everyone else, would one day live their last day, eat their last meal, breathe their last breath, and finally die. It was obviously inevitable that one day everyone will disappear from the face of Earth, never to be heard from or seen again.
Even though he had understood that death was unavoidable, Ness didn’t quite understand the concept of the cessation of life. Mostly because he hasn’t really experienced it.
The abstraction of human death seemed so unreal to him. Death was irreversible, there was no way out, no possible way to escape the suffocating fear of death.
Of course, it was only human that he would be afraid of death. There were only so many scientific explanations for what goes on during death, but little to none about what goes on in the afterlife.
But what if there wasn’t an afterlife? What if it was all superstitions and beliefs? An irrational point of view of life created by humans in a way to cope with the idea of death? The idea that nothing was to come afterwards? Ness would never truly know until he’s seen it for himself.
Ness inhaled deeply, letting the oxygen fill his lungs, he looked at the clock with bloodshot eyes, puffy eyelids shading over the red. 12:06a.m. the clock read, the bright numbers blinking every three seconds.
He’s long blocked out the ominous ringtone playing behind him, the feeling of the vibrations from his phone buzzing atop his bedsheet, stuffed between his pillow and mattress.
For one thing, his phone was on silent, it always is. Although nobody cared enough to call him– or even text him for that matter, he would never turn on the ringer. And another thing, the sound of the muffled ringtone, a menacing melody playing behind him, could only mean one thing.
It was Death Cast. There would be a Herald on the other side of the line waiting for him to respond, to exchange the life altering news– not that he would have much of his life to look forward to after this call.
He was a Decker.
Ness was going to die today.
-
M.K.
He was never one to be sentimental, or optimistic in that matter. He had always, and always will be a realist. He didn’t quite understand why people would try to see the bright side of everything, whereas he believed that if you just face the problem head on, you’ll be able to solve it in a matter of time.
He concluded that it must’ve been the science behind the human mind, something that he’ll try, but never truly understand. It didn’t matter how long he studied human psychology and manipulated his peers, with the knowledge that he had learned and the resources he was granted, he would never know what really goes on in the human mind. What goes on during the early years, the days before an unforeseen death, the moment the lights go out.
The only way to fully understand the human mind was to experience it first-hand, to see it happen in real time.
However, he didn’t want to die, but he didn’t want to live either. He disliked the idea of living on for nothing. There was nothing to look forward to, nothing to satisfy him. Each day felt useless and tedious.
He was eternally drowning in an ocean of thoughts and regrets, never dying, never coming up for air. The sea was too dense, too deep for him to escape.
He watched the bell’s toll swing back and forth, the quiet clicking akin to a metronome, in contrast to his loud pulse.
He didn’t live for nothing, but he had nothing to live for.
He is nothing.