Chapter Text
February 12, 2025
“I’m home,” Hao calls, entering the dorm. He’s carrying two black plastic take-out bags, one with tteokbokki and the other with sundubu jjigae.
Hao hears an enthusiastic “Hao hyung!” followed by a crash in the living room. Gyuvin appears at his side a few seconds later and opens the cupboard to grab plates and bowls.
“Where’s Hanbin?” Hao asks, smoothening his shirt.
Gyuvin eyes the door to Hanbin’s room and bites his lip. “Hanbin hyung hasn’t come out at all since I got here.”
Hao feels like his throat is constricting. “Gyuvin-ah, can you finish setting out the food? And maybe boil some water for tea? I’m going to check on Hanbin.”
“On it,” Gyuvin says with a salute.
Hao smiles at the boy before heading down the hall towards Hanbin’s room.
He knocks on the door with a soft, “Hanbin-ah?”
There’s no response.
Hao knocks again, louder this time.
He hears a cough from the other side.
Hao opens the door gently. The first thing he sees is a tangle of sheets and limbs on the bed. He takes a seat at the edge of the bed and pulls back the duvet.
Hanbin’s face is tear-stained and his eyes are red and he’s somehow still the most beautiful person in the world.
Their eyes meet and Hao reaches his hand over to ruffle Hanbin’s hair.
“You okay?” Hao asks, even though he knows the answer.
Hanbin shakes his head.
He’s been like this for a few days now. Ever since WakeOne started contract renewal negotiations.
He’ll be fine during practice but when they get back to the dorm, he’ll cry himself to sleep.
And Hao has no idea how to comfort him. Not when the future is so uncertain—not when there’s a chance that in a year, he won’t be a part of ZEROBASEONE anymore.
He doesn’t want to make promises he can’t keep, tell Hanbin sweet lies he doesn’t mean. Not after so many people did the same to him.
“Hanbin-ah, if anyone can figure this out, it’s you,” Hao tells him, because Hanbin is truly the strongest person he knows.
Hanbin sniffles in response.
“Nothing is certain yet.”
“That’s what scares me. Survival show groups don’t have the best track record. I mean, Mashiro sunbaenim and Yeseo sunbaenim both left Kep1er. And that’s one of the better cases. I.O.I, IZ*ONE, Wanna One, X1—”
The door slams open and Gyuvin stands at the doorway looking sheepish as he lowers his foot. He places two cups of tea on the nightstand next to Hanbin’s bed. “Hao hyung, Hanbin hyung, the food is ready.”
“Thank you, Gyuvin-ah. We’ll be there in a minute,” Hao says.
Gyuvin leaves and Hao turns back to Hanbin. He picks up a cup of tea and brings it to Hanbin’s soft lips.
Hanbin protests, but he’s no match for Hao’s aegyo.
“Better?” Hao asks after Hanbin takes a few sips.
“Mm.”
“As for what you were saying earlier, we’re not those groups, Hanbin. We don’t know how things are going to play out for us. Yes, they could end horribly, but it could also work out. We have to keep hoping and do everything we can to steer things the way we want.”
“You’re right,” Hanbin says. “I’m being stupid.”
“You’re not being stupid. You have every right to be scared. And as our leader, you have even more responsibility weighing on you.”
Hanbin wraps his arms around Hao and pulls him in. Their faces are close, too close. Hao’s heart is stuttering. Hanbin smells like sandalwood and jasmine and it’s intoxicating. Hao wishes he could reach out and—
“Thank you, hyung,” Hanbin says and Hao can feel his breath.
“It’s nothing. You would’ve done the same for me,” Hao says, quickly. Hanbin being this close is making him so nervous.
“Ya, Zhang Hao, just accept the compliment,” Hanbin laughs, pinching Hao’s face, whisker dimples appearing on his own.
“Let’s eat,” Hao says, standing up.
They exit Hanbin’s room and find Gyuvin waiting for them at the table. Relief floods his eyes when he notices Hanbin is smiling.
“Took you guys long enough,” Gyuvin remarks.
“Yeah, like it takes you and Ricky two hours to get ready when you’re together,” Hao snorts. “Say whatever you want, but at least I’m not the one who ogles my groupmate’s ass like a horny teenager whenever he walks by.”
Gyuvin’s smug grin falls.
“Just eat, you two,” Hanbin says in a poor attempt to hold back his laughter.
“I hope you master the art of subtlety one day, Gyuvin-ah.”
“Oh, you wanna talk about subtlety?” Gyuvin opens his mouth to continue and Hanbin uses the opportunity to shove several pieces of tteokbokki in his mouth.
Gyuvin lets out a muffled sound of annoyance.
“Now we can have some peace and quiet,” Hanbin says.
“You sound like Taerae,” Gyuvin tells him once his mouth is free.
Hanbin stands up and starts dancing to Giselle’s part in the final chorus of Whiplash. Or as Taerae calls it, “that part.”
Gyuvin and Hao start laughing. They clap while they laugh and clap once again when Hanbin sits down.
“That was spot-on,” Gyuvin says, slapping Hanbin’s shoulder affectionately.
Hao nods in agreement. “You captured our duck perfectly.”
“I wonder what the others are up to now,” Hanbin says.
“They probably already ate,” Gyuvin says. “Who eats dinner at 11 pm? If only this weird guy didn’t bring our food so late…”
“Ya, Gyuvin-ah. Listen up. If you want to get the food yourself, you’re more than welcome to.”
“No, no, no, I’m sorry hyung. Eating at 11 pm is extremely normal.”
“I ate at 11 pm every day when I was in college,” Hanbin adds.
“Ya, don’t help him!” Hao whines.
“Sorry, sorry,” Hanbin apologizes.
Gyuvin takes that as an invitation to start singing ‘Sorry, Sorry’ by Super Junior. “Sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry, 내가 내가 내가 먼저—”
“That’s enough, you can stop now,” Hao says.
Hanbin is laughing so hard he’s starting to sound like a kettle.
“You’re being insensitive,” Gyuvin tells Hanbin who is laughing so hard he can’t even form a sentence to respond with.
Hao sighs as he sets his finished bowl by the sink. “Gyuvin, you’re doing the dishes.”
“Why me?”
“I can do them,” Hanbin says.
“As long as they get done,” Hao tells them. “I’m going to get ready for bed. I have an early shoot tomorrow.”
Hao has just settled into his bed when a knock comes at his door. “Hyung?” He recognizes Hanbin’s voice.
“Come in.”
The door creaks, then gives way.
Hanbin, who looks way too cute in his hamster patterned baby blue pajamas, makes his way over to the bed.
Tears shine on Hanbin’s face, his breathing shaky. He’s crying again, Hao realizes.
Hao wraps him in a tight embrace. They hold each other for a while before Hao lets go.
“Sleep here tonight?”
Hanbin nods.
Hao pulls the duvet back so they can both slide under.
They lay in silence, their warmth reaching each other beneath the covers.
Hanbin sniffles, then coughs. Hao finds his hand in the darkness.
Little does he know, the future is already slipping through his fingers.
March 8, 2025
Hao enters his room to find Gyuvin and Ricky sitting on his bed, deep in discussion.
“Hao hyung!” Gyuvin exclaims, jumping up. “Rwik has something to tell you.”
There’s this almost pained look in Ricky’s eyes, like he’s filled with turmoil. Hao has a feeling he knows what this is going to be about.
Gyuvin ruffles Ricky’s bangs, pinches his cheeks lovingly. “I’ll be in my room. If you need anything, come get me. I love you.”
Ricky shoves him in the chest. “You fool,” he mutters, but his expression is one of adoration.
“Hao hyung, I love you too!” Gyuvin says enthusiastically before stepping out and closing the door behind him.
Hao sits next to Ricky. The bed sinks slightly under his weight.
Ricky takes a deep breath. Then another. Hao places his hand on Ricky’s back. “It’s okay, take as long as you need.”
“Hao-ge,” he finally says. “I love you, I love all of you so much. But… I don’t think I can renew if WakeOne keeps these conditions. But I’m worried everyone is going to hate me. I don’t want to be the one who tears us apart.”
Hao traces circles on Ricky’s back.
It’s a hard situation. Hao doesn’t want to lose his eight members either.
But for the past three years, WakeOne has been going out of their way to erase Ricky’s existence. All nine members get mistreated by the company but Ricky has it the absolute worst.
And if Hao hadn’t won first place on Boys Planet, he would’ve received the same.
And, although contract renewal discussions are still happening, it looks like Yuehua isn’t planning to back down. Matthew, Gunwook, Hanbin and Jiwoong’s companies seem willing to let them continue in ZEROBASEONE, but Yuehua’s CEO, Duhua, seems to have plans of her own.
So even if WakeOne was a good company, Hao, Ricky, Gyuvin and Yujin would be faced with a legal battle if they wanted to stay in the group.
Hao thinks it’s probably in the four’s best interest to leave the group and return to Yuehua, though he hates the thought of going along with what Duhua wants.
“We should talk to Yuehua first,” Hao says. He can feel a lump starting to form in his throat. “I don’t know if they’ll treat us much better but… at least… if we’re not tied to the group… it might be easier to then transfer to a different company. Whatever happens, I’m on your side, Ricky.”
“Thank you, Hao-ge,” Ricky says like a weight has been lifted off his shoulders. Hao pulls the younger boy into a hug.
Hao can’t sleep that night.
After lying awake for an hour trying to force out thoughts about his future, he finds himself in Hanbin’s room.
“Zhang Hao?” Hanbin mumbles from where he’s buried in the covers. “Is that you?”
Hao sits down on the bed. “It’s me. Sorry if I woke you.” He doesn’t say anything else, but Hanbin always knows how to read him.
“Sleep here tonight?” Hanbin asks, gently tugging Hao’s arm.
He nods. Hanbin slips his arms around Hao’s torso, then yanks him forward. Hao falls and lands on Hanbin’s chest with a soft thud.
“I’m here for you,” Hanbin says to him. “Even if the seasons forget to change, I’ll never let go.”
Hao drinks his words like honey. Maybe just for tonight he can ignore the future, the storm brewing in his heart, and the fact that promises mean nothing.
January 4, 2026
“‘Was I a good leader?—’” Hao snatches Hanbin’s phone and switches it off, cutting Keita’s ment short.
“Hanbin-ah, stop watching that,” Hao says. His voice is raw.
The two of them are sitting on Hanbin’s bed together, arms, legs and bedsheets intertwined.
“Hyung,” Hanbin finally says, a waver to his voice. “You’re under Yuehua too.”
Hao doesn’t like where this is going. “Hanbin-ah.” His voice is soft, careful like Hanbin might break if he speaks too loud.
Hanbin grasps Hao’s hand like it’s a lifeline. “They wouldn’t do this to us, would they?”
A complicated expression pulls over Hao’s features. “We don’t know,” he lies.
Tears are starting to slip from Hanbin’s beautiful eyes. “I’m scared, hyung. I’m so, so scared.” Hanbin’s voice is wobbly, broken. “I can’t bear to see our family torn apart. I really—I thought we could make it. I thought that if we worked hard enough they’d have no choice but to let us stay. But… after seeing what’s happening to EVNNE and Keita crying and Jeonghyeon and Seungeon, I’m terrified, hyung. I feel like I can’t control anything and I don’t know what to do.”
Hao pulls Hanbin towards him, wipes his tears. Hao feels like a piece of shit. He doesn’t deserve to be the one comforting Hanbin. Not when he knows what their future holds.
“We should get up,” he says.
Hanbin whines, then relents and helps Hao make the bed.
WakeOne calls the members into a meeting at 2:00.
Hao stands up and everyone turns to him. He makes eye contact with Ricky first, then Gyuvin. He can’t look at Hanbin, can’t look at any of them because then his resolve would crumble completely.
“I’m not renewing my contract.”