Chapter Text
I got sick. I don’t know with what, the stupid medical arms are all the way up in orbit, and I don’t think they’d know what it is anyway. The Eridian scientists think it’s something to do with me living on Erid, whether it’s the fake food or the air or whatever. Maybe the gravity put my body into overdrive and now I’m killing myself slowly. Whatever it is, a bunch of Eridians are working around the clock to figure out how to fix it. I don’t tell anyone, but I don’t think I’ll still be around by the time they figure out what’s wrong. Even the thousands of pages of medical journals given to me by Stratt don’t help, since they can’t read English and I don’t know what any of it means. Plus, it’s probably alien-related. Maybe eating Taumoeba has lasting effects.
Whatever it is, it’s killing me. I’ve lost so much weight I can see my ribs, and it’s getting harder and harder to get out of bed, especially with the gravity. Dozens of Eridians are in and out every day adjusting the lights and bringing me food. Well, food soup. I’m on a feeding tube, which is fine, but I miss actually tasting stuff. Meburgers were really good once I got past the whole ‘eating myself’ thing. The Eridians have turned my dome into a makeshift hospital, with IV bags and random machines near my bed, always monitoring me. Though they don’t beep constantly like a similar machine would on Earth, they do make a low humming noise, and I assume the tone would change if there was an issue.
My life has gotten a little boring. The Eridians told me I wasn’t healthy enough to teach, which is true, I can barely stand for more than five minutes, so I haven’t seen my students in a couple of weeks. Theres a limited selection of stuff to do in my dome now, mainly watching TV on one of the monitors we brought down from the ship. I mostly just lay in bed and watch Star Trek for the millionth time.
Rocky has been in and out, but not as much as before. Which is fine. It’s totally fine! I don’t miss his constant presence or anything. In fact, I’m glad to see less of him, after being stuck with him for four y- who am I kidding? I miss him a lot! I got so used to him always being there, always being able to hear me, and now I’m lucky if I see him twice a week. I get it, of course. He has a life here, with Adrian, and he told me he doesn’t like seeing me sick. Called me gross once he realized he could see my bones almost out of my body. I agree.
Whenever he is here, I savor it as much as I can. He watches me sleep sometimes, and those are the only times I don’t have a nightmare. We talk about his life, how Adrian is, how the other Eridians are, we try to keep it light. Eventually he asks how I am, and I try to lie for him, saying I’m feeling okay, but I know he knows I’m lying. I feel bad. Bad bad bad. A couple of months ago, when I was just starting to feel off, he told me about a project he was working on. He never got into details about it, but he gives me basic updates about it, saying how much progress is made. He keeps telling me it’s a surprise, but I’m getting a little tired for surprises. Once, I say as much.
“Can’t you just tell me what it is? I’d be able to help more if I knew.” I’ve propped myself up with pillows, and Rocky is in his xenonite orb on the foot of the bed.
“No. Is surprise. No telling.” Rocky huffs some smoke out of his radiator in annoyance, since I’ve asked so many times.
I roll my eyes, “Rock, I’m getting too tired for surprises. I just…” I hum, trying to think of how to get my thoughts out, “what is the goal? Of the surprise? Is it for fun?”
“No. Help Friend Grace. Surprise good surprise. Difficult. Done soon.”
I sigh. At least now I know for sure it’s supposed to help me. I don’t know how though. If it was new meds or something, wouldn’t they have done tests on me and stuff? It’s been nothing but food and IV changes for the past bit with different nutrients to try to see if I’m missing something.
“I don’t know if you can fix this one, bud.” I adjust in bed and Rocky freezes when he hears my joints crack. I wave a hand and he goes back to tinkering.
“Rocky fix. Surprise soon ready. Rocky save Grace. Again.” I can hear it in his tone, he’s joking, and I smile. I start to speak but a yawn cuts me off. My sleep schedule has been weird as of late.
“You sleep. I watch.” Rocky continues working on his… whatever it is. I nod and snuggle back into the bed, ensuring none of my medical wires and tubes get tangled up. I close my eyes and drift off to the light scraping of Rocky working.
It’s been two weeks, and I’m still not getting better. My eyes have started to blur even with my glasses, and the Eridians have to talk a little louder for me to hear them. I hate it. Before I know it, I’ll be blind and deaf, and won’t have any way to talk to anyone. I wish I could get back up to the Hail Mary. Theres tons of ways to kill myself up there, thanks to my late crew.
I blink in shock at that thought and push it away as I hear the airlock cycle start. I move, arms shaking as they push my body into a sitting position. I smile as Rocky comes in, rolling in his hamster ball. His carapace is high up, even with the movement of his arms. Something good happened.
“What’s up, Rocky? Surprise going well?” I smile and tilt my head at him. I’ve only seen him twice in the past two weeks, and we just hung out, watched TV and played some games. I didn’t push him on the surprise; I had no energy to.
“Surprise finish. Ready for Grace to see. Want to see, question?” Rocky is wiggling with excitement.
“Of course!” I try to swing out of bed, assuming I have to move to go see it, but Rocky puts his hands up and makes a low noise.
“Wait. We bring to you.” Rocky heads back to the airlock and makes jazz hands at the Eridians waiting outside. I didn’t even notice them before, not with my blurry vision and bad hearing.
I can hear the airlock cycle again as Rocky rolls closer to me. Three Eridians, all in xenonite orbs, enter the airlock, two of them pulling the third one with magnets. I squint, trying to see why, but I can’t make anything out. I recognize two of the Eridians as my nurses, Jackie and Wilson, but the middle one is new to me. Once they are through the airlock, they all roll closer, before leaving the middle orb in front of me. Now that it’s closer, I can make out more detail. It is an Eridian, but it isn’t moving at all, and its radiator isn’t pushing any smoke. I think they’re dead.
I blink, trying to figure out why they’re gifting me a dead Eridian, but then I look closer. I don’t think this Eridian was ever alive. There are no signs of life, no slight soot on the radiator, no cracks in the carapace from everyday wear and tear. It’s like a hyper realistic mannequin of an Eridian. I glance at Rocky, but he says nothing to explain. He just gestures to it like I’m supposed to know what it is. I look back at the carapace.
The carapace was a light sandy yellow, almost the same as my hair. The body looked tall for an Eridian, with the main body being more vertical than horizontal, and upon further inspection, one of the arms has the Hail Mary logo etched into it. I blink a couple more times, trying to put my thoughts together.
This was for me.
They made an Eridian body. For me.
What?
“What?” I look back to Rocky, who can surely hear how fast my heart is beating.
“Is Grace!” He says, like that explains everything. His carapace is high up in the air right now, slightly tilted. He’s smiling at me. His words are at such a high pitch I can’t imagine it could go higher. He’s so happy, and I don’t get why.
“Rocky, I’m tired. Which means I’m stupid. Please explain?” I watch Rocky as his carapace lowers slowly. I think he forgot I was ill for a second.
“Yes. Is Grace. Grace body ill. Make new body. Live on Erid correctly. Is Grace.” His voice is still high, and he’s still wiggling, but his carapace lowers even more when he says I’m ill.
“This… you are going to make me an Eridian? How?” I lower myself onto the floor, making sure my cords are long enough. I touch the xenonite barrier between me and the yellow Eridian. Between… me and me?
“Science Eridians study lots. I do not understand it. Human brain go in, Eridian brain come out! Fix problem.” He’s rolled next to me, putting a hand up on his own xenonite container. I put mine up to match it.
“I… Thank you.” I glance at the two other Eridians who are still here, standing by the airlock. “Thank you all.” They jazz hands in return.
“So, how will this work?”
The next couple of days are a blur, and that isn’t just because of my worsening eyesight. Dozens of Eridians are in and out, making sure everything is set up correctly. There are connectors all over my body, but especially my head, and they lead through a new addition to my dome; an area for the Eridian body. I have no idea how my brain and one heart will work to go into the crystalline brain and five hearts Eridians have, but the scientists assure me that it will work. There are risks, I’m sure, but no one is telling me them. I assume the worst-case scenario is death, but I think I’m going to die anyways, so that’s fine.
Ever since I left Earth, I knew I was going to die. First, it was a suicide mission, then Rocky saved me with extra Astrophage. Then I was supposed to starve to death, and Rocky suggested eating Taumoeba. Wow, Rocky saves me a lot, there’s like a bunch of other times too. Especially when he came into the oxygen to help... Now, I’m dying of some unknown illness, and Rocky, with help, made a whole new body for me, and a way for me to enter it. Even if it doesn’t work, Rocky really is the best.
I don’t bring up my worries to him. I don’t want him to think I doubt the other Eridians, or him. I’m just worried I’ll not be able to say goodbye, in case something happens.
The day of transfer arrives quickly. At least, I think it does. I slept most of the waiting time, with at least one Eridian watching me constantly, even when awake. I’m not sure how long it’s been since the whole project was revealed to me, but I’m not dead yet, so it can’t have been that long. There are half a dozen Eridians on one side of the barrier, with me, and the other half dozen with my Eridian body. Rocky is also with my other body, excited to help me adjust.
The Eridians on the other side hum to each other, and they’re all speaking over one another so I can’t understand them. I look to Rocky for an explanation, and he approaches the xenonite barrier.
“We ready. Grace ready, question?” I give him a thumbs up and he nods his whole body. He says something to the other Eridians, and they jazz hands back. One of the Eridians on the other side clicks something on a machine, and I see Rocky wave at me as my vision dims out. I smile. Hopefully I see—hear—him again.