Work Text:
The gift is a surprise.
Felix gasps a little when he notices it, only seconds before he'd been about to step on it in his haste to leave his cottage. He'd promised he'd meet with Yeosang to gather herbs for the healers, but he'd overslept, and now there was a gift left right outside his front door.
He picks up the package, wrapped in linen and twine with a newly bloomed sunflower tucked under the neatly tied bow. There's a card there as well, and Felix says a silent apology to Yeosang in his head as he goes back inside. He places the flower in a vase, pouring in water from the glass he didn't finish earlier, and sets it near the window.
The card has his name written on the front in neat handwriting, and when he opens it, the note makes him gasp once more.
"My dearest Felix,
Growing up, my mum told me that sunflowers represent a lot of things — good things, like loyalty and happiness. I don't know if anyone's told you this yet, but the reason we have so many in the village and why we let them grow so big is because of how well it can sustain us. The elders tell us it warms the earth, that it brings rain. I'm sure you know the basic uses like oil and seeds, but did you also know we use it to tell time? The sunflowers face the sun the whole day through. They rise in the east every morning and set in the west every day, just like the sun.
That's how I feel whenever I see you. My eyes follow you day in and day out like sunflowers follow the sun. You're my sun, Felix — beautiful, like sunshine, and bright and warm, both inside and out. All I want is to be around you and your warmth, even if it's just once, just for a moment.
I hope you'll accept this courting gift. To see you wearing it would warm my heart."
Felix giggles. He actually giggles, pressing the note close to his chest.
A courting gift.
His very first courting gift.
He's excited when he opens the linen, finding a new pair of gardening gloves with a little sunflower embroidered on each of the sleeves meant to protect the wearer's wrists. It's simple, thoughtful, and practical. Something he can actually put to use instead of keeping on display.
He turns to look at the sunflower in the window, and finds it is in fact facing the sun.
Felix tucks the new gloves into his bag, puts the note in the little wooden box filled with his meager amount of keepsakes, and rushes out of the cottage to meet Yeosang, a smile on his face as the sun warms his cheeks.
── ⋆⋅𖤓⋅⋆ ──
Felix and Yeosang are knee deep in the grassy fields on the borders of the village. They're out with the others who work with or assist the healers, gathering as many herbs and flowers as they can now that the first blooms have arrived. The seamstresses are tanning hides near the river not too far away, and those who work in the kitchens are here as well, out collecting herbs, wild berries, and mushrooms.
The village's carpenters are out in the woods close by, and the dull, monotonous sound of axes chopping at the thick trunks of the trees, mixed with the buzz of the bees and the chirping of birds soothes Felix, helping him to keep his head down and get through his work.
It helps that he has his new gloves, too. His eyes keep falling back to them nearly every second, catching himself every time his smile gets just shy of too wide. They fit him so well, and they keep him safe from all the thorns and prickles that may be hiding within the fields, keeping his fingers protected for when his shears get a little too close when he cuts stems.
Some of the omegas Felix has gotten to know have complimented him on them, noting how the pale yellow color is the perfect choice, how well they fit Felix.
"Is it a courting gift?" Yeosang had asked him quietly as they walked towards the fields together.
Felix nodded shyly. "It is."
"From who?" Yeosang's voice raised an octave in excitement.
"I don't know, hyung," Felix admitted, brows furrowed. "They didn't sign their name."
Even now, as Felix works, he finds himself looking around, assessing those in the village he'd managed to get to know over the last year, trying to figure out who of them he would have missed having an interest in him, enough of an interest to want to court him.
There's no one that stands out, at least not immediately.
He's gotten to know most of the village by now, but there are only a considerable few he sees and interacts with on a daily basis. Other than Yeosang, he thinks Jisung is the most obvious. But Jisung is also an omega, and is very much fond of someone else.
Hyunjin is another option, but he's also spoken for, and he's the type of person who would want Felix to know it was him.
Jeongin is also a very likely option, but Felix isn't quite sure that the young alpha would have eyes for Felix. He thinks Seungmin's the only person Jeongin really pays attention to.
Felix knows who he would prefer his secret admirer to be, but he doesn't know if the possibility of it being true excites him, or if it confirms that he's suddenly experiencing delusions of grandeur. He thinks it's best he keep his desires closer to his heart for now, to stick to speaking them only in his nightly prayers to the moon lest he jinx himself.
── ⋆⋅𖤓⋅⋆ ──
When their work is done and their full baskets have been delivered to the healers building, it's nearly lunch time. Felix and Yeosang head into the village center with the others who assist the healers, his gloves tucked safely in his bag, heads bent together as they chat idly about everything and nothing.
The village's main building is in the very center, and when Felix and Yeosang make their way through the doors, it's completely packed for lunch. The village usually tends to try to dine together, as to keep the pack relations strong, and their village chefs are incredibly talented, so meal times are usually full, but Felix has never seen it like this.
"It's Spring," Yeosang explains as they make their way over to their table of friends. "It's always busy once it warms up because everyone's out either for work, or for fun."
Felix nods, clutching his bag close as they make their way around the tables. They finally spot their friends near the front, food already spread across the table, including Felix and Yeosang's. Felix and Yeosang sit themselves down between Wooyoung and his mate San, who immediately push their food in front of them.
"Eat," San encourages. San's a good alpha, Felix thinks. He's incredibly gentle and kind, and very doting on Wooyoung and his friends. "We got extra bread, too."
"What's for lunch today?" Yeosang asks, taking his bag off and setting it on the ground between his legs. Felix takes his bag off, too, but Wooyoung grabs it from him and places it on the table in front of his food.
"Beef stew," Wooyoung answers, handing Felix a bread roll. "Minho said we should use up some of the extra meat stored from over the winter. So we're doing beef stew for lunch, and I think some sort of meat pie for dinner. Also, breakfast tomorrow is meant to be oatmeal, again, so don't say I didn't warn you."
A low groan rumbles around the table. Felix giggles. Their village has a large plot of oats, wheat, and sugar cane along their border, just behind their orchards, and their oat plots have been bountiful in the last few years. It's extremely helpful for their healers, since oats can be utilized for many things, but it also means their kitchens are plagued with an overflow of oats they often don't know what to do with. The village is subjected to oatmeal at least twice a week as a result, and though Felix likes oatmeal perfectly well, the majority of their village disagrees.
"Felix please save us," Seungmin faux whines from his side of the table. Hyunjin elbows him in the ribs at the volume. "The last time you gave them a suggestion, the oatmeal was actually tolerable."
"I hardly did anything," Felix insists. "I just suggested using apples, cinnamon, and brown sugar."
"That was plenty!" Seungmin praises, barely batting an eyelash when Jongho swipes the apple from his tray. "It made it edible for once."
Wooyoung hisses at the beta playfully. "Hey, watch it."
Seungmin smiles sheepishly. "I still love your cooking, hyung."
"Uh huh, sure," Wooyoung turns to Felix, elbowing him gently. "But we could use some help, if you've got any ideas."
Felix rips off a piece of bread and chews on it for a second, thinking about what the kitchens will likely have access to at this time of year for fresh ingredients, as well as what may be in the long term food storage. "If you have enough, you could divide them into three batches — one plain, one sweet, and one savory."
"Savory?" Hyunjin asks, "I've never heard of savory oatmeal."
"It's not common," Felix nods. "But it can be done. With dinner, save some of the bones from the beef to make beef broth. In the morning, you can set a batch aside and cook the oats in that, and then add mushrooms, kabocha, sun-dried tomatoes, and spinach. It's really good. For the sweet, maybe do the apples and cinnamon again, if you have some left. And then maybe plain with a little bit of honey, for the pups and the elders, so it's not so harsh."
Wooyoung beams. "Felix, you're a genius. Hey, if you want, in the morning —"
A hush falls over the village hall as the main doors open once more, all heads swiveling to the entrance. Felix feels his heart stutter in his ribcage, and one of his hands flies to his neck, pressing down on his scent gland to try and suppress his immediate reaction.
The village council has finally arrived for lunch.
As usual, Yunho and Seonghwa are at the back, offering easy smiles to the members of the pack who acknowledge them. In front of them, Changbin and Hongjoong, two out of three of the head alpha's second in command, are discussing something a bit animatedly.
At the head, is their leader.
Chan is on the younger side as a pack alpha, taking over the role when his parents decided it was time to step down as heads of the village. Felix had been told that Chan had been apprehensive at first, but he was a natural born leader, and the entire village adored him.
Felix included.
The first day he arrived here, it had been Chan who welcomed him, who declared Felix was a member of their village, who had shown Felix around and introduced him to his friends, and who had seen to the repairs in Felix's cottage while he stayed in a temporary bungalow near the healer's buildings. Chan had his cottage ready in no time, and had even gathered some excess furniture and odds and ends to fill Felix's home so he would be comfortable as he settled into his new life.
Chan is kind, intelligent, brave, strong, ridiculously humble — not to mention otherworldly handsome — and exactly Felix's type.
Felix just… isn't quite sure that he's Chan's type, in return.
Since Felix has arrived, Chan hasn't expressed any interest in any one in the village, whether they were born into or adopted by the pack. Their fearless leader has had his entire focus on the betterment of the village, of the pack, and he does an excellent job at it. Whenever he sees Felix, he simply offers his kind and gentle greetings, maybe a bit of small talk if he has the time, and always parts with a bright smile and a wave as he stalks off to wherever he's needed most — always the dutiful, hardworking pack alpha.
Felix has only gotten to know Chan in bits and pieces, but he's clung to every single piece thus far. To Chan, it probably seemed like he was sharing mundane things, innocuous crumbs, but to Felix, it was everything. He learned that Chan had bad allergies in the spring, that he sometimes needed to sleep on his back to avoid re-aggravating an old shoulder injury, that he preferred water or tea as opposed to the fresh pressed fruit juices — except pineapple — and that he never partook in the bonfire nights near the river because he didn't like drinking.
He had also learned that Chan only laughed around those he felt comfortable with, and to others, he offered a kind chuckle. Chan also preferred tasks that kept him outside, as Felix often saw him outside of their village buildings more than he did in any, save the main building. Their leader is also a great fighter, who happens to bruise easily, and for all his brutish strength and the threat of the kind of violence he can unleash, he's truly just a sweet, docile puppy, who is thoughtful, considerate of others and the things they may need or want, and —
For a moment, the hope Felix had felt earlier in the day returns, but he tamps it down and shoves it away as quickly as he can. He presses down harder on his scent gland in an attempt to cover it, placing his whole palm over the expanse of the soft skin as Chan and the rest of the village council pass their table.
Hongjoong reaches out and ruffles Wooyoung's hair affectionately, and Changbin bends to press a kiss to Hyunjin's hair as the group moves towards the line to grab their food. Only when they're a safe distance away does Felix remove his hand, wiping his palm on his pants to try and hide the evidence of his interest. His eyes glance around the table to see if any of his friends have noticed, but they've all returned to their conversations, so Felix returns to his food.
The noise in the main building eventually returns to its normal volume once the village council takes their seats at the head table — it's not far from where Felix is sitting with his friends, but not exactly close to them either — and Felix tries to be good and listen as best as he can. There's plenty to talk about each day since their village is a larger one, so at one point, he's able to tune out, sitting and eating quietly until everyone is done eating and they can head out to take care of whatever afternoon duties they have.
Except, right before he gets up to take care of his dishes and trash, he finally notices that their conversation has shifted to courting season. Felix tries to make himself smaller, to shrink inwards as he gathers his things so no one will ask him about his thoughts, or if anyone had approached him, or —
"I heard our little Lixie got his first courting gift," Wooyoung says, all too chipper. "Pair of gardening gloves, right?"
Felix looks to Yeosang, panicked, but Yeosang shakes his head, his eyes wide. "I didn't tell him, I swear!"
"Sangie didn't have to tell me anything," Wooyoung gives him a beatific smile, leaning forward with his elbows on the table. "I have plenty of other sources who saw you with it this morning."
"What if your sources are wrong?" Hyunjin frowns. "You know Yeonjun likes to gossip, and —"
"Actually," Seungmin clears his throat. "Jeongin, um, he said he saw you with the gift, too."
San blinks in surprise. "Is it true? You've gotten a courting gift? And you accepted?"
Felix can feel the way his face heats as he takes in the eyes of his friends around the table. They're all watching him expectantly, and he sighs, reaching for his bag and taking out the gardening gloves. There's a soft gasp from around the table, and Felix's blush deepens. He scrambles to shove the gloves back into his bag before any of his friends can even think to reach for it.
"Felix," Hyunjin murmurs softly. "That's so sweet."
"And very thoughtful," Seungmin adds. "It's a wonderful courting gift."
"Who's it from?" San asks quietly, his eyes already scanning the various tables for any potential suitors.
Felix looks to Yeosang, who gives him an encouraging smile. "I… I don't know."
His friends blink at him. "You don't know?" Seungmin parrots.
"They didn't leave a note?" Hyunjin asks, incredulous.
"They did," Felix nods, "But it was anonymous, they didn't sign it, so."
"Well how's that supposed to work?" Wooyoung gripes. "What point is there in giving it if they're not going to —"
"Complaining again, Young-ah?"
Their table turns to the new voice, finding Hongjoong approaching his younger brother with a teasing smile. Beside him, Changbin and Yunho have begun to collect the dishes and trash from Felix and his friends, taking them over to their proper areas. Behind them, Chan waits a couple of feet away, likely waiting for Hongjoong to finish up so they can go do… whatever it is they need to do.
Wooyoung frowns. "It's for a good reason, hyung!"
"And what reason is that?" Seonghwa, Hongjoong's mate, asks teasingly, approaching Wooyoung with a gentle hand on his shoulder.
"Lixie received a courting gift today," Wooyoung tells them. "But they didn't sign their name on his note!"
Embarrassed, Felix casts his eyes to the table, but not before taking the half second to check Chan's reaction to the news. As usual, Chan isn't paying attention, his eyes on his feet, and Felix doesn't know if it's false hope or an illusion that Chan's ears are red.
Seonghwa gasps softly. "Your first courting gift?"
Felix nods, too shy to look up.
"What was it?" Seonghwa asks, "If you're comfortable sharing."
"Gardening gloves," Felix murmurs. He pulls his bag toward him, taking the gloves out and showing them to his fellow omega. The gloves have specks of dirt on them, some blades of grass, but they're still in close to perfect condition, the embroidery untouched.
Seonghwa doesn't reach for the gloves, but he does coo, reaching out with his other hand to smooth over Felix's hair. "They're so lovely. You've accepted the courting, then?"
Felix nods again, still shy, far too shy to look up and meet any eyes of the council, of his friends.
Especially not with Chan still standing right behind them.
"You made a good choice," Hongjoong tells Felix. "And if eventually, you don't want to be courted anymore, you do have the right to change your mind. Just come get me or Changbin, if you do."
"Okay," Felix mutters, looking up with a small smile. "Thank you."
"I'll see you all later," Hongjoong says, "Hyung and I have to head out to meet the traders."
"Get me candy!" Wooyoung demands, hugging his brother tightly.
San frowns, "You still have some from last time?"
Wooyoung elbows San in the gut, but Hongjoong just laughs. Hyunjin gets up when Changbin comes back, the two of them leave, and everyone stands from the table to gather their things as well.
Hongjoong waits until everyone is up so they can all walk out together, and Felix clings to his friends, walking between Yeosang and Seungmin. He holds the door open when they get to the front, making sure to be mindful of anyone who may be behind him, and his heart leaps in his chest when he sees Chan coming through the door.
Felix smiles at him politely, as he always does, adjusting the strap of his bag to try to cover his scent gland as best as possible.
Chan smiles back at him politely, as he always does, grabbing the door from him. "Thank you, Felix."
"You're welcome, Alpha," Felix always makes sure to address him properly.
Chan shakes his head. "No need for that. Just Chan is fine."
He always says that, but Felix never listens. It'd be rude, he thinks, to deny Chan his proper title.
"I heard something about new gloves?" Chan asks, gesturing towards Felix's bag with his chin.
Felix flushes red, his heart beating like a war drum. "Yes, gardening gloves. They're a courting gift."
For some reason, Felix fishes them out from his bag, holding them out for Chan to see. Chan looks down at them, reaching out to run a finger along the carefully stitched seams of the embroidery. His hand drops to his side as he smiles at Felix with a little nod. "They suit you."
By the moon, Felix swears to himself. How charming can a person possibly be?
"Thank you, Chan," Felix says this time.
The answering smile Chan gives him keeps Felix in good spirits for the rest of the day.
── ⋆⋅𖤓⋅⋆ ──
Felix bolts upright in bed, gasping for air as he tries to drag himself out of his nightmare.
You're fine here, he thinks to himself. It's not real. You're safe here.
It takes longer than he would like for his racing heart to finally ease, but once it does, he's too afraid to fall back asleep, not wanting another nightmare to plague him. He gets up, padding out to his kitchen and lighting a fire for the wood stove. He finds the kettle Yeosang had given him when he first moved and fills it up in the sink before placing it onto the stove to heat.
He doesn't have much left of the tea meant to help him sleep, so he uses what he has left, packing the dried herbs into the little strainer and grabbing for the mug, setting both aside before lighting some candles for ambiance.
A speck of yellow out of the corner of his eye directs his attention, and he turns to look at his little sunflower. A soft smile works its way up his cheeks, and suddenly, he's wide awake. He goes about lighting a fire in his fireplace, heading back into his bedroom to grab his blanket so he can be comfortable on his rocking chair.
Felix makes his tea when it's ready, taking his mug over to the rocking chair and curling up under his blanket by the fire.
He finds himself staring at the sunflower in the window, unable to look away.
When he moved to this village last year, he never expected to be courted at all. He'd arrived just after their last courting season had passed, so he'd missed all of the excitement. His new friends had told him what he needed to know, but Felix had always assumed because he was newer to the village, that when the next courting season arrived, it would be likely that he wouldn't be involved.
Most villages tend to shy away from courting new strangers — Felix's birth village certainly did, newer members to the village weren't courted until they'd been living there for at least five years at minimum — and he'd fully expected his new home to be the same. Plus, he hardly thinks he's made such an impression on anyone, certainly not great enough of an impression to be courted during his first season.
Felix places his mug on the little side table by his rocking chair, going to fetch his keepsake box. He takes the letter out as he settles back into his spot, curling his legs beneath him as he reads through it once more.
It's… incredibly sweet. The gifts were wholly thoughtful — the gloves had been wonderful to use all day, and just seeing the sunflower fills Felix with an overwhelming sense of peace. He wonders, briefly, how courting works here — is he meant to receive a new gift every day? Once a week, maybe? Courting gifts in his home village were sporadic, the intention and insinuation behind each gift more important than the quantity of the gifts, or the frequency of receiving them.
Felix thinks he wouldn't mind if he didn't get a new gift in the morning. He would, however, be particularly sad if he didn't get a second letter. As thoughtful as the gardening gloves are, the words of the letter are what wrapped around his heart and made him want to accept the courting of his admirer, to wear them out to see if whoever had gifted them to him would notice that he had them on, that he was showing them off.
If only he could figure out who the person was.
He doesn't know how long he sits there, curled up on his rocking chair by the fire and reading the letter over and over again, when there's a knock at his front door.
Felix frowns. He doesn't need to glance at his sunflower to know the hour is late, and that there's no particular reason for anyone to be visiting him. He gets up anyway, wrapping his blanket around his shoulders, letter still clutched in his hand as he opens the door, nearly collapsing when he sees who's on the other side.
"Alpha?" He murmurs, the disbelief evident in his voice and probably written all over his face. "Is something wrong?"
Chan smiles sheepishly. "Funny, I was about to ask you that."
"Wha — no." He shakes his head. "No, everything's fine."
"Are you sure?" Chan asks, brows furrowing with worry. "We were out on patrol when I saw the smoke from your fireplace, and I noticed the candles in your window. I thought it'd be best to check on you."
"Oh," Felix's cheeks heat once more, embarrassed. What must Chan think of him? He's probably been this helpless little thing in his eyes since day one — always in need of help, never sure of what's going on because of the cultural differences of their villages, always trying to fit in despite not knowing what he's doing, and now, never able to sleep a full night through — and just the idea of it makes Felix shrink in on himself. "I'm okay. I just — I had a nightmare, so I couldn't sleep."
Chan frowns. "Are you alright?"
"Better now," Felix murmurs. He lifts his head, notices Changbin and Hongjoong lingering just on the other side of his fence. He waves, albeit a bit dejected at Chan's closest friends seeing him this way, too. They wave back with kind smiles, and Felix directs his attention back to Chan. "I'm sorry to make you worry. You should probably get back to patrol."
Chan shakes his head. He turns, waving Changbin and Hongjoong off. The two of them nod, waving once more before walking off.
Felix frowns. "What are you doing?"
"Helping," Chan smiles. "Can I come in?"
Felix nods, stepping back and waving Chan inside.
Waving him in with the hand holding his letter.
Felix nearly squeaks as he moves to hide it behind his back. Chan smirks, but takes mercy on Felix and pretends not to notice. He toes his boots off by the door, lining them up alongside Felix's own boots, before he steps further into the cottage on socked feet. He takes a look around, noting the empty jar of herbal tea, and Felix's abandoned mug on the side table near the fireplace.
"Is that the tea the healers make for sleep?" Chan asks, though Felix is sure he doesn't need an answer.
He nods anyway, clearing his throat. "It is. I use it sometimes, when I can't sleep."
Chan frowns. "How often do you have trouble falling asleep?"
"Not often, really," Felix insists. "It's not falling asleep that's the issue, it's staying asleep."
"Like tonight," Chan supplies. "Because you had a nightmare. How often are you having those?"
Felix hates that this is the most they've spoken since the early days of Felix moving to the village. "Not often," he repeats. "Maybe once every few weeks?"
"That's pretty often, Felix," Chan says softly, concern etched all over his face. "Does the tea help you?"
Felix nods. "It does. Sometimes it takes a bit to kick in, but it does help. I sleep until it's time for me to wake up."
"Maybe you need something stronger, a different brew that won't cause nightmares," Chan suggests. "I'm sure if you mentioned it to the healers, they'd be able to help."
"I'll do that," Felix nods. "I'll ask them in the morning."
"Good," Chan smiles, and Felix doesn't know what to do with the way it makes him feel, to have Chan's approval like that. His omega preens, and Felix pulls the blanket tighter around his neck, praying it covers his scent gland.
Chan's eyes scan his living area once more, gaze landing on the sunflower in the vase in Felix's window. He pauses, then, staring at it intensely. Felix doesn't know how to explain its presence, and he's not sure why. There are sunflowers all over the village, he could just say he picked one because he thought it was pretty and put it in the vase to keep, but he feels like Chan will see right through his lie, and he doesn't want to lie to Chan — not now, not ever.
But… There's something about the way Chan is looking at the sunflower that gives Felix pause. For a moment, it's more than Chan just staring at a flower. If Felix didn't know any better, he'd say that Chan was almost… surprised. Like he didn't expect the sunflower to be on display.
"Do you like sunflowers?" Chan asks suddenly. He blinks, like he hadn't meant to ask such a thing out loud, but turns to Felix anyway. There's an expression on his face, something eager, which seems ridiculous. Why would Chan be eager to hear anything Felix has to say?
"I do," Felix nods. "They're my favorite, actually."
Chan's mouth twitches, like he wants to smile, or say more, but instead, he just nods, turning his head back to the flower.
Felix pauses.
There's no way… could he be…?
After a long moment, Chan finally tears his eyes from the sunflower, his expression gentle when he looks at Felix once more. "Let's get you to bed, little one."
Little one. Chan called him that, back then, when he first moved here. It feels like it's been ages since Felix has heard the nickname, since he's felt wrapped up in Chan's care at the words.
His omega wants to turn on her back and show her belly, wants to yip and whine and chuff to let her alpha know how happy she is. Felix hates that he has to ignore her. He nods instead, heading towards the candles he lit to blow them out while Chan works on putting out the fire in his fireplace. He stuffs the letter he'd been holding into his kitchen drawer, hiding it from Chan's sight.
They both turn at the same time to take care of Felix's wood burning stove, and Felix flushes deep, blaming it on the residual heat as they work together to close the air vents and damper to suffocate the fire.
Felix expects that to be it, expects Chan to bid his goodbye and leave, but instead, he gestures towards Felix's bedroom with his chin. "Go on."
He listens, because he doesn't know what to do. He's hyper aware of how barren his bedroom looks all of a sudden as they cross the threshold, self-conscious of the way his blankets and sheets are so haphazard. It doesn't help that the moon is high in the sky and shining right through his window, illuminating everything. Chan doesn't even blink at the state of his bedroom — he just carefully takes the blanket off of Felix's shoulders and pushes him toward the bed gently.
"I'll tuck you in," Chan explains.
Felix's embarrassment worsens. His ideal alpha is here, in his bedroom, tucking him in like he's a child. There's no way Chan is his secret admirer. Not when his care and protection feels like this, like obligation, like concern for the outsider.
Still, he climbs into bed like he's told and gets under his sheets and blankets. Chan is careful and precise as he lays the final blanket over Felix, pulling his bedding up so it rests under Felix's chin.
Chan smiles at him so sweetly. "Goodnight, Felix." He bends down, grabbing another stray blanket that had fallen to the floor, wrapping it around his own shoulders as he makes to move back to the living room.
"Alpha, wait," Felix calls out before he can take another step.
Chan turns back to him with a small frown. "You don't have to call me that, Felix. I've told you, Chan is fine."
Felix still doesn't like the idea, but he acquiesces. "Channie-hyung, where are you going?"
"To the living room," Chan says with a small smile, like it's obvious, like it's a thing he's done before.
"Why?"
"I'm going to stay to make sure you don't have any more nightmares."
"You're going to stay?"
"I'm meant to be on patrol all night," Chan says, the corner of his mouth quirked up in a grin. "I think this still counts as patrol — I am looking after members of the village, after all."
"But… shouldn't you sleep?"
"If I need to, I can sleep on the rocking chair. It's really not a big deal."
Felix frowns, shaking his head. He moves to sit up, but Chan makes a small noise in protest and in warning, so he lays back down. He doesn't know why he says it, but he does, tells Chan, "No, you can sleep here. We can share my bed. It's big enough."
Chan's mouth twitches with the threat of a smile, but instead of his mouth turning up, it turns down. "I… I couldn't, Felix. I couldn't just — that's your nest."
Oh. Right. Well, "I don't mind. And I'm inviting you in, aren't I?"
"Yeah, but you're doing it for my sake, and I couldn't —"
"It's for me, too," he insists. "I wouldn't feel right, letting you sleep out there on the rocking chair. As comfortable as it is, it's not comfortable enough to sleep in all night. I wouldn't be able to sleep knowing you'd be out there like that."
Chan blinks. "Are you sure?"
Felix nods. "I'm positive."
He hesitates, but caves, rounding the bed and climbing in beside Felix. There's still space between them, and as much as Felix wants to close the distance, he doesn't. Instead, he turns on his side to face Chan, smiling softly when he says, "Thank you."
Chan shakes his head. "I hardly did anything."
"You've done plenty," Felix promises.
When he eventually falls asleep, the last thing he sees is Chan's handsome face smiling down at him. He smells something calm, like sandalwood, lets it envelope his senses as he's pulled toward slumber.
── ⋆⋅𖤓⋅⋆ ──
When Felix wakes in the morning, Chan is gone.
His side of the bed is neatly made, the blanket he'd grabbed from the floor folded neatly at the corner of his side of the bed.
Felix frowns. His bed — his nest — feels cold and empty and wrong without him, but Felix knows he won't be able to remake it anytime soon, not with Chan's scent embedded in the fabric of his bed linens, his pillow.
He gets ready for the day with a heavy heart, exhaustion still creeping through his veins. He slept better with Chan there, but the lack of sleep in the first place still lingers. Felix makes sure his garden gloves are secure in his bag before he puts on his boots, checking that he'd also packed his shears and the empty tea jar before he finally opens his door —
— and finds another gift on his doorstep.
All of his previous worries slowly dissipate, the pain numbing. It's another package wrapped with linen and twine, the card tucked under the bow this time instead of the sunflower, because with this gift, instead of one sunflower, there are three. Felix smiles as he bends to pick it up, looking left and right to see if his admirer could still possibly be lingering around. When he spots no one, he retreats inside, resting the gift on the counter.
He grabs for the sunflower in the vase first, emptying the water and using his garden shears to cut the stem down an inch. He does the same to the new flowers, placing them all inside the vase before filling it with water from the sink. He's almost proud when he places the vase back in the window — proud to have them, proud to show them off, proud that he's starting a small collection.
His hands nearly shake as he opens the letter.
"My dearest Felix,
Did you know there is also a moonflower? Technically, moonflower is not its name. The moonflower is a morning glory. The moonflower is a special type of morning glory that only blooms at night, and closes up again once morning comes. Morning glories represent love, and deep, unshakeable affection. We have moonflowers along the rivers, and their bright, white blooms are so pretty at night, but they hide that beauty from us when the sun arrives.
Unlike the moonflower, my feelings for you don't go away when morning comes — if anything, they grow tenfold, growing more and more each day as the sun rises, watching you in the sunlight, seeing the way you shine, wanting nothing more than to feel your warmth. You don't hide your beauty, either. You are beautiful in the morning, beautiful in the evening, beautiful at all hours of the day. How is it possible that you are both the sunflower and moonflower at once? How have you managed to become my sun, my moon, and all the stars in the night sky?
I don't know how, and I don't care. All that matters to me is that you are here, and that I wish to be by your side, even if for a moment, for a sunrise, or a sunset, or a moonrise, or moonset. You are everything, Felix, everything and more.
I saw you wearing the gloves, and I heard you used them well. I'm so glad, Felix, and so grateful. I promise you won't regret accepting my courting. In time, I'll tell you who I am, but if you pay close enough attention, I have a feeling you'll figure it out on your own. You're brilliant in that way.
If you could find it in your heart to accept this gift as well, my heart would be overjoyed."
Felix gasps, tears springing to his eyes at the sincerity. He fights through the emotion clogging his throat, trying to keep the tears at bay as he gently opens the package.
It's a pillowcase, beautifully embroidered with a bright yellow sunflower and pristine white moonflower in the upper left hand corner. Accompanying it are two sets of handkerchiefs with matching embroidery, this time with the sunflower and moonflower etched into the bottom right hand corners.
Felix's hands shake as he lifts the fabric up for closer inspection, tracing over each stitch, feeling the bumps and ridges and and smallest of imperfections. He can't imagine how long this must have taken his admirer, can't imagine how many hours they spent embroidering the two blooms into the fabric of each of his gifts.
He grabs the first letter from the kitchen drawer, taking it and his new letter and gifts to his bedroom. He lays the pillowcase on his bed, vowing to find a suitable pillow to use it with when he gets back home later. With the handkerchiefs, he puts one away in the top drawer of his nightstand, and the other he folds carefully, tucking it into the front pocket of his work coat, taking extra care to ensure the embroidered corner is folded over the pocket to put the flowers on display.
He hopes that whoever his admirer is sees him today, too. That they know their words have truly touched Felix's heart.
── ⋆⋅𖤓⋅⋆ ──
When Felix arrives at the healers building with the extra herbs he'd cut this morning, it's to excitement and a lot of chatter. When the others notice him, they pull him into their group.
"What's going on?" He asks.
Soobin and Yeji, two of the betas who help with the healers, pull Felix away from the group a little bit so they can get away from all of the noise. Soobin bends his head close and whispers, "Jongho gave Yeosang a courting gift this morning. Yeosang accepted."
Felix blinks. "Jongho did? What was it?"
"Roses," Yeji whispers urgently. "Can you believe that?!"
Felix cannot. Roses are rare, especially where they live. They don't grow well or last through the changing of the seasons, and rose seedlings are quite expensive. The healers can only access fully bloomed rose buds through trades with other villages, and even then, those trades only happen once every few months.
"Where did he even get them?" Felix asks, turning to look at where Yeosang is tearfully cradling the bouquet to his chest. The blooms are crimson red, but bright in the morning light, and Yeosang keeps staring at them like he expects them to disappear.
Yeji shrugs. "I don't know. Some people think he left after lunch yesterday and had Yunho escort him to the closest village that had some to buy them."
Soobin nods. "Yeonjun says he saw delivery men come to the council building yesterday, so others think the roses were part of the delivery. Either way, he went through great lengths to get them just for Yeosang."
"That's so sweet," Felix murmurs as they both turn their attention to Yeosang — Yeosang, who looks a little green under all of the attention.
Yeji pulls on the sleeve of Soobin's shirt to get his attention. "Should we save him?"
"He's going to throw up if we don't," Felix insists.
He moves first, shouldering his way through the group while Yeji and Soobin follow. When Felix grabs hold of Yeosang, he turns to the others who'd been questioning him and says, "Sorry everyone, but we have to get to work."
"I'm sure you'll have plenty of time to ask your questions later," Yeji adds sweetly.
Soobin smiles too as he rounds out the back, guiding the three of them away from the group of onlookers. "If you're not here to see a healer, or here to help, please take care on your way out. We need the space for any patients who may come our way."
The crowd groans in disappointment, but they disperse anyway. Those who remain either head to their usual stations in the healers building, and others to the seats in the waiting area. Soobin guides the four of them toward the back area where those who work in the healers hut store their belongings.
They sit Yeosang down on one of the benches, and Felix sits beside him while Soobin and Yeji take the opposite bench. Yeosang looks dazed, and he's clutching the roses to his chest, one of his fingers absently rubbing over the twine tying the bouquet together.
"Sangie?" Felix tries, keeping his voice soft. "Are you okay?"
"He asked me in the main building at breakfast," Yeosang murmurs, his eyes unblinking. "In front of like… a hundred people."
Yeji gasps softly. "Oh, oppa. I'm sorry."
Anyone who has the privilege of being Yeosang's friend knows he's quite shy, and he doesn't like any situation that could draw attention to him. He prefers to blend in, to be among friends and in the conversation, but not the immediate focus. Jongho knows that, and Felix knows that Jongho knows that, so he doesn't understand why he asked to court him the way he did.
"Yeosang," Soobin murmurs softly. "Did you say yes… because you felt pressured? Because he asked you in front of all those people?"
"Or did you say yes because you wanted to?" Felix supplies.
Yeosang shakes his head. "I said yes because I wanted to."
"You're just… in shock," Yeji surmises. She gets off the bench to crouch down in front of Yeosang. She smiles up at him sweetly. "How about I walk you home? Some fresh air might help. We can put the roses in a beautiful vase, and then when we get back here, I'm sure Soobin and Felix can make you some tea."
Soobin and Felix nod immediately. Yeosang finally blinks, looking between them. "Could you… could you all walk with me?"
"Of course!" Felix is quick to say. "Let me just find Taeyeon and let her know where we're going."
He rifles through his bag and grabs his empty jar and the sachet of extra herbs and rushes from the room and heads through the building until he finds Taeyeon, one of the head healers, where she usually is in the mornings — in the tea room. She's reading from a sheet of orders as she gathers necessary herbs into their designated jars, and Felix is reminded of Chan's instructions from the night before.
He lightly knocks on the doorjamb, drawing her attention. She smiles when she sees him, setting the order sheet down. "Felix, everything alright? Haewon said she saw you gathering extra chamomile this morning."
"Everything's okay," he nods. "I saw some blooms we missed yesterday, so I grabbed some just in case," he hands her the sachet, and she places it in the basket with the other herbs that need to be dried.
"You're so dutiful," Taeyeon smiles with a shake of her head. "Was there something else you needed?"
"Ah yes, two things, actually. Yeosang isn't feeling well, so Yeji, Soobin and I were going to help get him some fresh air."
"Would that have anything to do with the courting proposal he received?"
Felix nods sheepishly. "Yeah, he's a bit overwhelmed. We were going to take him home to put his gift away and come back to get him some tea."
The healer nods, grabbing for some dried herbs. "That sounds like a plan to me. We're slower this morning, so you've got plenty of time. I'll get started on brewing him something that'll help when you all get back."
"Thank you, noona," Felix smiles, then hesitates. Taeyeon is the one who knows the most about Felix's sleepless nights, and he's never had issues talking to her about them before, but this feels different. He doesn't want to say it's because of Chan, but it is, and for some reason, it makes it feel like this is a bigger deal than normal. "And the second thing is… I ran out of the tea that helps me sleep. But, I don't always sleep through the night? I've also been having nightmares. Not as often, they happen maybe once every few weeks, but I think I need —"
"— Something stronger. I agree." Taeyeon nods. She holds her hand out for his empty jar, and he hands it over, watching as her eyes begin scanning the shelves and baskets of herbs. "I'm glad you told me. I'll be sure to make you some before you leave today."
"Thank you," he says earnestly. "I really appreciate it."
Taeyeon gives him a fond look. "You don't have to thank me, Felix. It's the least I can do for all you've done to help us in the last year. Now go, the sooner Yeosang gets some fresh air, the better."
── ⋆⋅𖤓⋅⋆ ──
Felix is absolutely exhausted at the end of his work day.
It had been nice to be with his friends this morning. Yeosang was a lot better after their walk and drinking some of the tea Taeyeon brewed, and Yeji and Soobin were excellent at being able to help calm him down. He'd been sure that the slow morning was a sign of a slow day, but things inevitably picked back up, and they'd been busy up until lunch, and in the hour right after.
They have an early day tomorrow since they're meant to be gathering more supplies along the river, so he heads to the back area to gather his belongings and head home. He passes the tea room on the way and pops his head in when he spots Taeyeon labeling jars for the completed orders.
He knocks on the doorjamb, smiling when she spots him. "Just wanted to let you know I was heading out."
"Perfect timing," she turns, grabbing the jar with his name on it and handing it to him. "This should work a little better. If it's too bitter you can add honey, but only a spoonful."
Felix nods. "I will, thank you —"
As he goes to take the jar, Taeyeon pulls it back so it's just out of his reach. A cheshire smile works its way up her mouth. "You know, something very interesting happened after you left for lunch."
Felix blinks. "Interesting?"
"The head alpha came by. He said he was concerned that you were having trouble sleeping, and he also asked me to make something stronger for you, something that may also help with nightmares."
It's humiliating, the way Felix's cheeks heat and his heart begins to pound so loud he can feel it in his ears. "H-He did?"
Taeyeon nods. "Mhm. And when I asked him how he became aware of your affliction, he suddenly became as quiet as a mouse."
"He's just being nice," Felix insists. "He saw the smoke from my fireplace last night after I woke up. He was on patrol and just stopped in to check on me."
"Really?" Taeyeon smirks. "Because I could smell you, you know. On his shirt."
Felix wants to die.
"Taeyeon-ssi," he swallows a nervous lump in his throat. "It's not what you think."
"Oh relax. You can drop the formalities, you're not in trouble! It's not like you're not allowed. It is courting season, after all."
"Courting season?" Felix parrots, suddenly clueless.
Taeyeon gives him a knowing smile. "Some of the girls noticed you'd gotten new gardening gloves yesterday. And I couldn't help but notice the embroidered handkerchief hanging out of your work coat pocket."
Felix's hand flies to his pocket, covering the little flowers. "Oh."
"Oh," she shakes her head. "Honestly, Felix. If Chan is courting you, then —"
"He's not."
Taeyeon blinks at him. "He's… not?"
"Well, no," Felix shifts on his feet. "At least I don't think so?"
"You don't think so?" Taeyeon puts his tea jar down onto the worktop and crosses her arms. "Explain."
"I don't know who's courting me," Felix says. "I've only gotten two gifts so far, and the letters I've gotten with my gifts haven't been signed."
"And you don't think it's Chan?" Taeyeon tilts her head in consideration. "Why?"
"I don't think it could be," Felix admits with a shrug, his heart slightly sore. "I don't think…we don't really know each other that well. Or, I don't know him that well. And I don't think he's all that interested in me. He's been helping me since I moved here, but I think that's it. I think he's just being a good head alpha, a good leader, that's all."
Taeyeon is quiet for a moment as she looks at Felix. She looks at him like she's assessing him, like she's trying to figure something out — what it is, Felix isn't sure — but she eventually sighs with a small nod. She grabs his jar off of the counter and hands it out to him.
"Let me know if this helps or not," she says gently, and Felix nods, grabbing the tea jar with a quiet 'thank you.' As he turns to leave, Taeyeon calls his name softly. When he looks at her once more, she has another knowing smile on her face. "Whoever your secret admirer is, give them a chance. You may not know them well, but they certainly know you."
── ⋆⋅𖤓⋅⋆ ──
He didn't know if he wanted to join everyone for dinner tonight with how exhausted he is, but he knows if he doesn't, and his new tea doesn't help, he'll end up waking up in the middle of the night looking for something to snack on, and then he'll have a tummy-ache, and —
And it's worth it, to be here at dinner. Especially when the village council arrives.
It had started to rain before dinner time, and the village council had been training outdoors, so when they arrived, Felix was greeted with the sight of a wet and sweaty Chan, shirt nearly soaked through, and he was very pleased he decided to eat.
Of the village council, Chan is the most muscular. He's not the tallest — like Yunho — or the biggest — like Changbin — but he is the strongest, the most formidable. His wolf is the largest of the group of them, the largest in all the pack and village, and though he's in human form now, it's a fact that still separates him from the others. Though, Felix always separates him from the others.
To Felix, there is no one else like Chan.
He finds himself squeezing his legs together, pulling his work coat around his shoulders a little tighter. He leans closer to San, hoping the alpha's scent will drown out his own. He ducks his head and turns his attention back to his food, hoping to blend in with the rest of his friends as the council passes by. He hears when Changbin comes to greet Hyunjin, when Hongjoong comes to greet Wooyoung — feels it when Hongjoong shakes out his spiky hair to annoy his little brother, the rest of them unfortunate collateral damage — and he hopes that that's the end of it, that they all walk away and —
"Hi, Felix."
He tries to keep his expression neutral, but he can feel the way his cheeks heat, the way the tips of his ears get hot, the way the butterflies in his belly begin to flutter incessantly.
Felix looks up to find Chan standing right behind Yeosang, his entire body facing Felix and Felix alone. It's almost too much to have his attention like this, and Felix is unable to help the shy, toothless smile that stretches across his lips. "Hi, Alpha."
Chan shakes his head fondly. "What did I tell you about that? Chan is fine."
From his left, Yeosang rests a calming hand on Felix's knee — he hadn't even realized he'd begun to bounce it out of nervousness. Felix nods, "Sorry — Chan. Channie-hyung," he corrects immediately. He thinks he hears Seungmin snicker from across the table, followed by a low groan, probably thanks to Hyunjin.
"Did you talk to Taeyeon-ssi?" Chan asks him, "Did you get your tea?"
"I did," he nods. "She um, she said you'd stopped by."
"I did," Chan nods in return. Felix swears he can see the tips of his ears turning red, though his expression remains neutral. "I wanted to check in on you, make sure you were feeling okay."
"That's very thoughtful of you, hyung," Wooyoung chimes in, all too chipper and up to no good. Felix feels a small sense of dread creep up his back. "Checking in on our Lixie at work."
Hongjoong reaches out, pinching at Wooyoung's ear and tugging once in warning. Wooyoung yips, then collapses into San's other side.
"I'm fine," Felix says with as reassuring of a smile as he can muster. "Thank you for checking in."
Chan smiles, his eyes drifting down to Felix's chest.
To where the handkerchief rests, still tucked into his work coat, embroidery still on display.
Felix's heart leaps from his chest with so much hope he doesn't know if it'll land safely.
"Cute," Chan notes. "Is that new?"
Yeosang turns, following Chan's gaze, and his eyes nearly pop out of his skull. Not a single one of Felix's friends had noticed Felix's new gift — other than Taeyeon — too consumed with Yeosang's predicament. At the moment, all Felix can do is nudge Yeosang's foot with his own, urging him to school his expression and go back to his food.
Felix's hand comes up to cover the embroidery. "It is. It's um — I got it this morning."
"It suits you." Chan grins, then turns to the rest of the table, bidding them all goodbye when he says, "Enjoy the rest of your dinner."
Chan and the rest of the council leave, and Felix wishes they'd taken his friends with them, because once they're alone again, all eyes turn to Felix and where he's still covering his new gift.
"Lixie," Wooyoung says sweetly. "I will leap across this table and tackle you if you don't show us your new gift."
"Right now," Hyunjin adds helpfully, his smile razor sharp.
Felix lets his hand fall into his lap, picking up his spoon and digging back into his beef and vegetable soup. "It's a handkerchief," he says around a mouthful.
"I can see that," Seungmin smiles. "Embroidered, too. Just like your gloves."
"It's cute!" Hyunjin adds with a small giggle, and the others around the table make equal noises of appreciation.
"Guys," Yeosang chastises, placing a comforting hand on Felix's back.
Felix frowns, unsure if they're all teasing him or not. He doesn't say anything in the end, just keeps eating, keeping his eyes on his food and trying to make sure that his emotions are in check, lest they give him away entirely.
San must sense his discomfort, because he taps Felix's shoulder gently. Felix turns, frown still on his face, and San smiles encouragingly.
"Do the gifts make you happy?" San asks quietly, so as to not alert the others. Felix nods, because they do.
They're very thoughtful, and clearly handmade. He's only received two gifts so far —technically four, if you count the pillowcase and handkerchiefs as separate gifts — but he can feel the care in them, can feel the intention behind them even without the accompanying letters, and he appreciates deeply how they've been made and given to him with the goal that he'll actually use them as opposed to keeping them on display, or tucking them away in a box to collect dust.
San nods. "And you accepted their courting?" Felix nods in return, and San's smile grows just a little bit. "Then that's all that matters. Don't let the others bother you. They're just teasing, but they mean well."
Felix feels marginally better. It must show on his face, because then San pats him on the back gently before turning back to his own dinner. Felix gives San his extra bread roll as thanks, and San makes a happy noise, showing it off to Wooyoung, who smiles gratefully at Felix, before San eats half of the roll in one bite.
He feels like there's still eyes on him, so he glances around the table. He looks at Yeosang first, checking in. He seems like he's doing better now, though he's pointedly ignoring Jongho from where he sits a few tables over with Mingi, Yunho's mate, and some of their other friends, despite Jongho's staring. For a couple who's now in the courting stage, you wouldn't know it based on their matching longing expressions.
Though, Felix supposes it's better than his predicament — at least Yeosang knows who's courting him, at least he's seen and spoken to Jongho.
Felix nudges Yeosang gently, and he turns, giving Felix a soft smile.
"You okay?" Felix asks.
"I could ask you the same," Yeosang murmurs. "And for the record, I think your handkerchief is really pretty."
"I'm okay," Felix nods. "And thank you. Also, for the record, I think your roses are really beautiful."
Yeosang flushes, turning back to his food. "They are," he says softly. "I really like them."
"Then that's all that matters," Felix says, taking a page out of San's book. "If anyone bothers you, let me know."
"You're a good friend, Felix," Yeosang smiles. He glances up, only for him to cast his eyes back down. "And since you're such a good friend, I think it's important to tell you — I don't know if you've noticed, but Channie-hyung has been looking at you almost all night."
Felix stiffens, his eyes falling back to his dinner. He hopes he doesn't get a crick in his neck for all this looking down he's doing.
"What happened between you two?" Yeosang asks quietly. "I don't think he's paid this much attention to you since you first got here. And he came by the healers building today? When was that?"
"He helped me last night," Felix admits. "Noona said he stopped by after we left for lunch. It was just to check on me. He's probably just trying to be a good leader."
"If you say so." Yeosang mutters. "Looks like a little more than that to me."
"What do you mean?" Felix turns to look at him, trying to ignore the fact that he can see Chan in his periphery.
"He looks like he's three seconds from leaving his table and coming over here to make you finish your dinner. Every time you stop eating, he gets this look on his face like he's going to start pacing."
Felix looks at Yeosang in disbelief. "No… that… that can't be right."
Yeosang smirks. "See for yourself."
Felix looks back at his dinner, content to just finish what's left of his half-eaten soup.
But… he is curious, mostly because there's no way that Yeosang could be right about that. Chan's probably just concerned about Felix since after dinner, he'll be going home to go to bed, and he just wants to be sure Felix will be alright this evening.
That's all. Chan is a good head alpha, and good leader.
Felix takes a small bite of his bread roll and looks up casually as he chews, making a note to put the roll back down onto his plate. He pretends to scan the room, looking at all of the members of the village. When his gaze gets to Chan, he means to just gloss over him, to make a quick note of his expression and return to his dinner, but he ends up doing a double-take.
Chan is staring right at him. He's holding his own bread roll in his hand, and when he realizes he's caught Felix's attention, his expression doesn't change. Instead, he gestures with his chin to Felix's plate. Felix tilts his head, confused, and when he doesn't move. Chan raises his own bread roll to his mouth, taking a bite.
Oh.
Felix should be surprised that Yeosang is right, but he is the smartest of all his friends.
He grabs his bread roll, holding it up slightly in question. Chan nods at him as if to say, 'go on,' and Felix takes another bite. Chan takes a bite with him, mirroring him. He thinks that's it, that that's all Chan wanted, but Chan holds his gaze, clearly determined. This time, Felix dips his bread roll into the soup, and Chan nods with a small smirk, pleased with Felix's choice as he copies him once more. When they both take their bites, Chan's eyes fall from his own and look down just a smidgen, and Felix realizes belatedly that Chan is watching him eat — he's making sure Felix's mouth is moving and that he's actually chewing and swallowing his food, that he's not doing it just to placate the alpha.
He keeps going until it's gone, and once he's done, Felix thinks that surely this will be it. Now that he's finished his bread roll, Chan will nod his approval and move on. Except, Chan picks up his spoon and looks at Felix, waiting for him to do the same. Felix pouts a little, but obediently picks up his spoon and takes another bite of his beef soup. He chews on the meat, watching as Chan takes his own bite.
Felix has no idea what's happening. Admittedly, he recognizes that this is far more than just the care of a head alpha. This is something Felix has only ever known mated pairs to do, and just the thought of that makes him pull his work coat tighter over his body, fighting to keep his emotions at bay.
There's a bittersweet edge to the moment, though. It is certainly more, but at the same time, Felix still doesn't know what this is, or what's going on. As much as Felix wants to believe that this could be something, Yeosang is right. Chan has paid more attention to him in the past day than he has since he first moved to their village, and this can't have all possibly changed just because Felix couldn't sleep.
For a moment, Felix wonders if he's being toyed with. He doesn't want to think that Chan could do such a thing, but like he'd mentioned to Taeyeon, he doesn't really know Chan all that well. He knows enough to know what kind of person he is, but he knows nothing about what could be causing this sudden behavior.
Felix is numb as the rest of dinner progresses in the same manner. He barely tastes the food, even as Chan matches his every bite until their plates are cleared. Chan nods at him once he's done, a pleased smile stretching across his face. Felix has managed to back himself into a corner with his own thoughts, so the smile he gives Chan in return isn't as pleasant as he would have liked, nor as bright as the ones he usually gives him, but he has to hope it's enough.
He's saved from having to witness whatever Chan's reaction is when his friends move, standing to gather their plates and trash to bring them to their designated spots. If his friends notice that Felix moves quicker than normal, they don't say anything. They don't say anything when he's the first one out the door, either, or when he insists on walking to his cottage alone.
It's better this way, he thinks. He needs time to sort out… whatever the heck is going on, and he can only do that if Chan isn't occupying his every thought.
── ⋆⋅𖤓⋅⋆ ──
His mug is empty of his new tea and upside down in his sink when Felix curls up in his rocking chair next to the fireplace. He has his two letters in his hands, reading through the words again and again and again until his eyes blur with emotion.
Perhaps it doesn't matter what Chan's intentions are. Maybe it doesn't matter what he's doing or why he's doing it at all. Maybe this is what matters — that Felix is being courted by someone who's trying to communicate the ways that Felix makes them feel, by someone who thinks of Felix enough to try to give him things he needs, things he can make use of. Taeyeon said his admirer clearly knew Felix, even if he didn't know them, and that's more than he can say for what little he has with Chan.
Besides — Chan's head alpha. He's the leader of the village and the leader of his pack, a pack Felix isn't part of yet, and may never be part of. Chan will probably be expected to court and mate with someone from his pack, and since his parents used to lead, they probably already have someone picked for him, probably someone that Chan has known since they were little.
Felix hopes that whoever is courting him is kind. They seem to be, though it's only been two days, but their care and consideration is evident. The way they describe how they see Felix is… generous. Felix doesn't think he's ever had that effect on anyone before. His admirer clearly thinks the world of him, and Felix feels a rush of guilt at the realization that Felix can't say the same — one, because Felix doesn't know who he is, and two, because at the moment, the only person Felix thinks the world of is Chan.
He hopes his admirer won't begrudge him for it. He hopes by the time his admirer makes themselves known, it won't be an issue anymore. He hopes by the time that courting season is over, he'll be happy with his admirer and he won't be so hung up on the head alpha all because he was the first person to show Felix something as simple as kindness.
He's restless, all of a sudden. It's too much to bear all of his thoughts like this, and there's no way the tea will take if he's going to let his mind run wild.
Felix puts his letters back in his keepsake box and grabs a spare shirt and pair of linen pants. He strips down until he's naked, clutching the clothes in his hands as he heads out the door. It's dark out, the only light is the moon and the stars in the sky, which suits him just fine. He sets the clothes down inside his fence on the little log he sits on sometimes to tend to his garden, shaking out his limbs as he reaches within, stirring his omega awake.
Finally, she thinks.
It's been awhile since he's been in his wolf form. The transformation is familiar, his bones feeling slightly uncomfortable with all the time that's passed. It's probably been a couple of months since he's last allowed his omega to roam free, and he lets her take her time to stretch out their limbs, shaking out their fur as they tip their nose to the sky.
Spring is definitely upon them. Felix sneezes when all of the various flora and fauna hit his senses — it's much stronger when he's like this, and his omega bristles.
Sorry, he tells her, we can go when you're ready.
His omega takes off in a run without another word, breaking through the treeline and heading for the river.
── ⋆⋅𖤓⋅⋆ ──
Felix curls up in the tall grass, resting his snout atop his folded paws.
The river is cooler at this time of night, a soft breeze floating through the air that calms his frazzled mind. His omega had run through all the grass along the river side, had chased after butterflies and drank from the river, and it had felt nice to just succumb to his instincts and let his omega lead.
She's a little tired now, so Felix takes his rest where he can get it. It's not too late into the evening, so he'll still be able to get plenty of sleep before he has to be up early in the morning. He'll be right back here with the other healers, and he made note of all the things they'll probably need to collect in the morning and where they're most bountiful.
Felix thinks he's tired himself, so he checks in with his omega.
Ready to head home? He asks. Or did you want to run a little more?
She stirs, uncertain. Can I walk us home?
Of course, Felix says, standing up and shaking out their fur. You know the way.
She does.
She sets off in a light trot, mostly to get through the tall grass quicker. It's just as they're about to approach the treeline that she stops suddenly, tail standing straight in the air.
What is it? Felix asks. He can't see anything, and he can't hear any one else. He's not pack, so if someone from the village is here, he won't be able to sense them.
Alpha, is all she says.
Which alpha?
Alpha.
Felix means to repeat his question, thinks for a moment that she doesn't understand, but then he smells it.
Sandalwood.
Chan.
Felix turns toward the scent to see his large black wolf trotting towards them. When he spots Felix, golden fur among the darkness in the forest, illuminated mostly by the moon, Chan stops. He huffs, shaking out his fur as he approaches. He can't hear whatever it is Chan is trying to say as he circles Felix, nipping at his belly in warning when Felix tries to move out of the way. Felix yips, whining in slight annoyance.
Did Chan follow him out here? How did he find him?
Chan huffs once more in response, continuing his inspection of Felix. He sniffs along his fur, bending his head to press his snout into Felix's shoulders, his hip area. Once he can see that Felix is fine, he nudges at the back of Felix's neck, nipping at the fur there. It's not a scruff, but it's a close enough thing that Felix can tell he's being scolded. Chan aligns their bodies, then gently pushes Felix toward the treeline.
Felix is the one who huffs now. He'd been heading to the treeline when Chan decided to make himself known, fully intent on going home. He moves now without looking back at Chan, trotting along towards his cottage. He can hear Chan following him, can hear Chan huffing and whining as he follows along, probably scolding Felix in his head.
For once, Felix is thankful he's not part of Chan's pack. He'd probably be irritated with whatever it is Chan's trying and failing to reprimand him for, all his complaints falling into silence.
Once they break through the trees and Felix's home is in sight, Felix turns, snapping his teeth in warning.
Stay here, he thinks. Chan seems to get the message enough. He growls a little, clearly not pleased, but sits on his hind legs, planting his front paws firmly in the dirt as if to say 'I'm not going anywhere.'
Big, stupid puppy. Felix grumbles to himself. He heads into his yard and by the fence, grabbing his clothes where he'd left them as he hides behind the big oak tree in his front yard. His omega whines a little when he transforms again, but he sends her a silent promise that they'll get to do this again soon. He needed it as much as she did, even if he couldn't see it at first.
He confirms he's completely concealed from Chan's view behind the thick tree trunk and shucks on his clothes. He steps back out into view when he's done, meeting Chan's eyes.
"I'm fine," Felix says, trying to keep his voice even. "Thank you for walking me home, Alpha."
With that, he turns on his feet and heads inside, shutting the door behind him. His fire's still going, and his house is blissfully warm because of it. He heads towards the wash basin near the corner, bringing it to the sink to fill with water so he can clean his feet before bed. It's half full when there's a knock on his door, and Felix frowns.
When he opens it, Chan is standing on the other side of his door wearing a pair of linen pants.
Only a pair of linen pants.
Felix keeps his eyes solely on Chan's face as he frowns. "Alpha?"
"Felix," Chan warns. "Please don't make me repeat myself."
He sighs. "I'm fine, Channie-hyung. Really. I just… I had a lot on my mind, I guess. I just went for a run."
"After you drank your tea?" he questions. "The one that's supposed to help you fall asleep?"
Felix blinks. "How did you know I drank my tea?"
"I came to check on you," Chan explains. "I can see your sink through the window, you know. I knocked like, three times. When you didn't answer, I looked inside to see if maybe you'd fallen asleep in your rocking chair, and I saw your mug in the sink, and your tea jar was on the counter."
"Well, I appreciate your concern. But I am okay, so —"
"You could have fallen asleep out there," Chan says. He's clearly trying to scold Felix, but there's hardly any venom behind his words. "That was really dangerous, Felix. What if I hadn't come to check on you? What if you had fallen asleep out there? It's barely spring, and the last frost hasn't officially passed yet. Our village may be secluded, but we still get strays from time to time, and —"
Felix's entire being cracks in two.
Strays.
"Like me?" Felix asks, voice small.
Chan blinks. "W-What?"
"Strays," Felix repeats. "Like me?"
Chan's entire expression crumbles. "What? No, Felix. Absolutely not."
"Why not?" His gaze drops to his feet. "I did what strays do, didn't I? I wandered until I found a new place."
"You're not a stray, Felix," Chan says, voice firm.
"Then what am I?"
A soft gasp leaves his lips when there are suddenly gentle hands on his face. Chan's touch is searing hot, but the pressure is oh so delicate as he lifts Felix's face, directing his gaze right to Chan's own. His brown eyes are full of emotion, nearly glassy with unshed tears.
"You're Felix," Chan insists. "That's who you are. Just Felix."
Your Felix? He hopes pitifully.
Felix can only look at him. Chan's only ever touched Felix a handful of times, each time purposeful or intentional, no hidden motivation behind it. This is nothing like those times. It's just another moment that feels like more, and Felix's restlessness threatens to return.
"I'm sorry," Chan tells him, wholly sincere. "I wanted to check on you, make sure you were able to get to sleep okay. When I didn't see you at home, and I saw your clothes in the yard, I panicked. I was worried and concerned — I know you can take care of yourself, but you're a member of this village Felix, which makes you one of my own. I shouldn't have taken my frustrations out on you, especially when you did nothing wrong. I'm sorry, Felix, I really am."
Felix sniffles, nodding. He's definitely exhausted. It has to be the tea — it's the only rational explanation for why Chan's words make him want to cry, and he convinces himself that it has nothing to do with the torrential mess that his own feelings are.
"I'm sorry for worrying you," he murmurs, trying to keep his tears and his distress at bay. The last thing Chan needs is to smell burnt vanilla.
Chan makes a soft noise of protest, shaking his head. "No, little one. You have nothing to be sorry for. It's my fault, okay? Just mine."
He thumbs at Felix's cheeks, his touch soft as he traces the space under Felix's eyes, wiping up tears that never come. Chan leans forward, rubbing his cheek against the side of Felix's temple in apology, a gentle rumble coursing through his chest to try to calm him down.
It works — Felix all but sags into Chan's touch, his breathing evening out as they stand there practically intertwined.
"Time for bed, little one," Chan murmurs eventually. "Let's get you tucked in."
"Gotta wash my feet," Felix says, gesturing to the wash basin. "They're dirty."
Chan chuckles softly. "Okay. We can do that first. But then, bed."
"Will you stay?" Felix asks quietly. "Like last night?"
"I will," Chan promises.
Felix nods then, agreeing to the arrangement, and Chan steps back. His hands are slow to leave Felix's face, and there's something like regret in his eyes when they're no longer touching.
In the morning, Felix will tell himself that he dreamed it.
Chan helps him fill the wash basin while Felix goes to get two clean wash cloths, two smaller towels for drying, and a bar of soap, and when he gets back, Chan has pulled a chair from his dining table to sit near the fireplace, the wash basin in front.
"Sit," he says, taking the things from Felix's hands. "I'll do it for you."
Felix can't find it in himself to argue or fight. Never mind if this is also something only mated pairs do — if Chan is feeling apologetic and feels this is how he can make up for it, Felix won't push him.
Chan dips the cloth into the basin, getting it thoroughly wet before he rubs the soap onto the cloth, drawing out the suds. His touch is gentle with this too, holding the sole of Felix's foot in one hand as he cleans him with the other. It feels nice, and his careful movements are enough to lull Felix closer to sleep.
He gently taps Felix's ankle when he's done with both feet, and Felix sits up, grabbing one of the small towels to dry his feet. Chan takes it from him before he can even bend down, setting the cloth and bar of soap into the basin and drying Felix's skin for him, too.
When his feet are back on the carpeted floor of his living room, Felix makes to reach for the washcloth. "Let me help you."
"No, little one," Chan insists, "I can take care of it. Go put your tea away."
Felix frowns, but nods. He heads toward his little kitchenette, grabbing his tea jar and securing the lid, putting it back in the cabinet. He washes and dries his mug, too, setting it back on its hook in the windowsill.
By the time he's done, Chan is cleaned up and… still shirtless. Felix had almost forgotten, among the delicate nature of the moment. When they get to his bedroom, Felix spots the pillowcase lying on his bed where he'd left it earlier in the day. He grabs for it, folding it neatly and meaning to tuck it in his nightstand drawer.
"Did you want to find a pillow for that?" Chan asks before he can open the drawer.
Felix nods. "I do, but I can do it in the morning."
"No, it's fine. Wait here," Chan says, then heads back into the living room. Felix can hear him ruffling around in the big basket that contains his spare blankets and pillows, and he's back in seconds, holding one out. "Try this one."
It's the perfect size, because of course it would be, since Chan found it. He holds the pillow in place so Felix can secure the pillowcase over it, smoothing the fabric out once it's on. Chan lays the pillow on Felix's side of the bed, holding the covers open so Felix can climb inside.
The second Felix's back hits the bed, he knows it won't be long before he's sound asleep.
Chan does the same thing as the night before, making sure each layer is draped over him before he even thinks about climbing in beside him. This time, when Felix turns on his side, Chan doesn't stick to his side of the bed. He reaches out, pulling Felix into his embrace, and Felix doesn't even hesitate to curl himself up against Chan's bare torso. He's incredibly warm, his skin soft, and Chan tangles one hand in Felix's hair, resting the other on his back.
His lips brush against Felix's forehead when he murmurs, "Sleep now, pup."
Felix is out like a light.
── ⋆⋅𖤓⋅⋆ ──
Chan is gone again in the morning.
It's early, but Felix isn't surprised. His duties as head of the village never ceased, and Chan was probably out of bed at first light.
The ache of his absence isn't as bad as the day before, and Felix finds he has no questions for Chan's behavior, no desire to learn more, or understand his reasoning.
It just is — it's happening, though Felix doesn't know why, and Felix recognizes his role in this is to just play along.
He's sluggish this morning, too, unsure if it's the tea or the whirlwind of a journey his emotions took him on the day before. Getting ready is much of the same — he bathes and gets dressed, packs his gloves, his shears, some dressings just in case someone needs a cut patched up, and tucks his handkerchief into the pocket of his work coat, keeping the embroidered corner on display. He sets his bag aside, figuring it'd be better to check his doorstep first, instead of heading out only to come back in.
Given the early hour, Felix doesn't expect there to be a gift at all, but he should have known his admirer wouldn't disappoint him like that.
The wrapped gift is there, and so is the card, but instead of three sunflowers, this time, there is an entire bouquet. It's wrapped with delicate paper and bound with twine, the petals somehow brighter in the early morning light.
Felix has no idea if he has a big enough vase for these.
He brings everything inside and shuts his door, setting the gift on the counter and cradling the bouquet in one arm while he reads the letter.
"My dearest Felix,
I remember the day you arrived at our village so vividly. I think it's the first time I'd ever believed in the idea of soulmates, or love at first sight. I was so relieved, back then, to hear that you came to our village of your own volition, that nothing terrible or awful drove you here, that you just wanted a change of pace and had been told to find us. In truth, I think that you were sent here to find me. Or at least, I'd like to believe that's what the moon intended for us.
I also remember thinking how sad I was to know you'd arrived after our last courting season ended. I felt terrible to think that way — you were so happy because it was the start of summer, and you'd never experienced summer in a valley before. Who would I have been to resent that joy, all because I didn't have the chance to court you properly?
In the year that's passed, I vowed to spend every day seriously considering your courting gifts, crafting each one by hand so you might feel comforted by the touch of someone who desires nothing and no one but you. I wanted you to know how grateful I was that you'd arrived, how deeply I feel for you, but more than anything, I wanted you to know that I see you.
I see you, Felix. I see you — you sunflower, you moonflower, the beautiful wolf with golden fur who walked into our village, and straight into my heart. You may not be able to tell who I am yet, but I hope that I get to show you, so that you may see me, too.
I'd give you a million things if I could. For now, I hope you can settle for one more — a stone, from the river near your cottage, so that you have something from this valley for forever.
Until tomorrow, my heart."
Felix opens the package, and nestled inside among a soft bed of hay lays his third gift.
It's a necklace.
Handmade as well, as all his gifts are, as his admirer promises them to be. The cord is of a soft leather, and the pendant that rests on it is the river stone, expertly carved and polished to a brilliant shine in the shape of a crescent moon.
He tucks the letter in his keepsake box with the others, and manages to find a vase that just manages to fit his new bouquet. He sets this one on the window sill above his sink — he wants it to be the first thing he sees when he returns home.
This present, Felix wears proudly as he sets off for the day, the stone sitting on his collarbone for all the village to see.
── ⋆⋅𖤓⋅⋆ ──
The necklace brings him all kinds of attention.
Everyone who sees it can tell it's handmade, can tell the person who crafted it likely spent months trying to get it into the right shape, to perfect the smoothness, and ensure the polish was pristine. There's a slight chill in the early morning air, so his work-coat stays on, his handkerchief proudly on display in the pendant's absence. Felix offers no information about who has been giving him such thoughtful and perfectly crafted gifts, he just settles for confirming that they're from the person who's been courting him if the question arose.
He keeps it tucked inside his shirt once he begins working along the riverside as the late morning sun begins to creep out from behind the clouds, wanting to keep it close to his heart. Soobin and Yeji stick close to him and Yeosang, keeping the two of them from all those dying to know more as they start to gather moss from the rocks and grass along the river bank.
Felix is grateful for the busy work. It gives him the opportunity to really think about who's in his immediate environment, to try to figure out who his generous admirer could be.
He immediately rules out any of the healers he works with. Most of them are mated, or just wholly uninterested in Felix in that way, and he knows that for certain based on the kind of friendship that they have. For this, he rules out most of his friends, too, since they're in the same boat. It can only be someone Felix interacts with at surface level, someone just on the outside of his orbit, someone who is around Felix enough, but not in a capacity that allows them to be close. Someone that Felix sees every day, but he wouldn't think twice about had it not been for courting season.
A part of him wishes he'd paid more attention to people after he'd moved in, that he'd been more social, but he never imagined he'd be someone that anyone in the village would be interested in, especially this soon. It's almost been a year since he's arrived, and to know that someone could have feelings for him this quickly is —
Well, he supposes he understands. After all, he'd managed to fall for Chan in no time.
He curses himself internally.
He's not supposed to be thinking about Chan, he's supposed to be thinking about his secret admirer, about a more realistic choice of a mate. He's supposed to be thinking about the person who views Felix so preciously, who has spent painstaking hours crafting his gifts, writing him the sweetest letters, and collecting fresh sunflowers for Felix, delivering them at his doorstep in the early hours of the morning. In the three days it's been since courting season started, Felix has barely spared this person a single thought because of their village leader, and he feels guilty for it.
Chan will not be his, Felix has to remind himself. Chan will not be with him. He'll end up with someone else in the village, and whatever Chan has been doing in the past will be nothing but a distant memory. Felix's feelings for him will fade, and he'll be mated to the person who is courting him.
"Felix!"
He turns, finding Soobin waving. "Baskets are all full. Taeyeon-noona said it's time for lunch!"
Felix glances down at his basket, blinking in surprise. His basket is indeed full of the moss from along the riverbank. He bends to try to lift it, but his basket is quickly seized, carried with ease for him.
He blinks, looking up and freezing when he spots Chan.
The others have seemed to notice their village leader, as well, because everyone has gone silent. Their eyes are stuck to where Chan stands in front of Felix, his basket full of moss sitting atop one of Chan's broad shoulders, the water from the river leaking through the basket's weaving and dripping onto his shirt.
"Alph—" Chan raises a brow, and Felix gulps. "Channie-hyung — you don't have to carry that, I can handle it."
"I've got it," Chan assures him with a small grin. He gestures with his head towards where Yeosang, Soobin, and Yeji are waiting for him. "Go with your friends, they seem hungry."
"But —"
"Go, Felix," Chan says softly. "It's alright. Go get something to eat."
Felix gathers his things, casting one last glance at Chan before he joins his friends. The rest of the council is here, too, Changbin, Hongjoong, and Yunho helping to gather the rest of the baskets and loading them up into the carriage while Seonghwa confirms the total of them with Taeyeon. Felix knew the moss they were collecting today was going to be used by more than just those that worked with the healers, so seeing the village council come to collect wasn't a complete surprise.
When Seonghwa and Taeyeon spot Felix observing them, they look at one another briefly, sharing a secretive smile, before they turn back to Felix and waved.
Felix waves, then immediately turns back to his friends.
Strange. Whatever was going on there, it had to be trouble.
"What did Channie-oppa say to you?" Yeji asks him quietly. "Did you get in trouble or something?"
"No," Felix insists, "He just took my basket and told me to go eat lunch."
"That's… it?" Yeosang raises an eyebrow, turning back to look at Chan. "Huh."
"What?" Soobin asks eagerly. "Do you know something?!"
Yeosang frowns. "No, should I?"
Felix shakes his head as he picks up his pace. "There's nothing for us to know."
He starts to walk ahead of the others, but Yeji quickly catches up to him. She wraps her arms around one of his as she leans in to whisper, "If there's nothing for us to know, why do you smell like the pack leader?"
Felix flinches, nearly tripping over his feet. "I do not!"
"Yes you do," Yeji singsongs. "Did you forget we're pack?"
Felix did forget that Yeji was in Chan's pack. He just huffs in response, ignoring her giggling as they enter the main building and go their separate ways. Yeji's all too happy as she skips towards her friends, and Felix can feel Soobin watching him as he goes to join his mate and their friends. He finds his usual table, sees Hyunjin and Wooyoung already sitting down, so he's quick to grab Yeosang and drag him to the line to get their food.
When they sit down a couple of minutes later, Felix still isn't spared. Hyunjin and Wooyoung look at him expectantly, probably having heard about his gift, and he sighs, taking the necklace out from under his shirt so it rests comfortably on his sternum.
Hyunjin gasps. "Oh, Felix. It's beautiful."
"It really is," Wooyoung assures him. "It looks wonderful on you."
Yeosang nudges him lightly with his elbow. "Do you have any idea who made it for you?"
Felix shakes his head, peeling the tangerine that came with his lunch today. "No, the letters are still anonymous, and —"
"Hi, Felix."
The four of them at the table all freeze, looking at Felix while Felix looks at them. Hyunjin, Wooyoung, and Yeosang turn their wide-eyed gazes to the person behind Felix.
When he turns, he expects to see one of their friends, maybe someone who works with the healers, or maybe Chan, but instead, he sees someone totally different.
Someone he doesn't know all that well. He knows their name, of course — Felix is good with names — but he's not quite sure as to what Kota would want with him. The alpha is one of the fighters that works with San, teaching other members how to defend themselves and ensuring those who wish to be able to fight for the pack and the village are able to do so well enough that they don't get hurt.
Felix has mostly seen Kota in the healers building as a patient multiple times since he's arrived in the village — he tends to bruise very easily — but they've only really ever exchanged a few words with one another, mostly just greetings. Felix has never been the one to treat him, or handle his follow up care.
"Hi, Kota," Felix greets back, putting the tangerine back onto his plate. "Everything okay?"
"Yeah!" Kota says cheerily, a bit nervous. He shifts his weight from foot to foot. "Do you mind if I speak to you in private?"
Oh…
Oh.
Felix looks at Kota, really looks at him.
By all means, he's an ideal alpha. He's tall, strong, fast from what San says, one of the top fighters in the village. Felix has only ever seen Kota in two places other than the gym — the nursery and the school — and he's heard stories of how good Kota is with children. Felix thinks he also helps the carpenters with carrying lumber, but he can't be sure.
Felix tries to think of how often Kota could have been in his orbit, how frequently he could've been around Felix without Felix even realizing he was there. It makes guilt course through Felix's body once more, and a small pit of worry forms in his stomach.
Could Kota be his secret admirer? Has Felix really accepted his courting?
There's a low growl from behind him. Felix turns in disbelief, having no idea as to why Hyunjin would be reacting this way. From what Felix knows, Hyunjin's never even spoken to Kota, either. Hyunjin is pack, whereas Kota is not — he's a villager, just like Felix — but that's certainly no reason for Hyunjin to growl at the alpha.
Felix cuts his gaze at Hyunjin, chastising. "Hyunjin."
Hyunjin snaps his teeth at Kota. "You shouldn't ask an omega to be alone with you like that."
Kota frowns. "I didn't mean it like that, I was just going to —"
"It's okay," Felix insists. He turns to his friends, giving them a look they hope understands to mean 'calm down,' before he turns back to Kota. "We can talk outside?"
"Felix," Wooyoung hisses.
"It's okay," he repeats, standing from his seat. Yeosang frowns, and Hyunjin looks properly upset, but Felix has to know.
He has to know if all of his gifts, his letters, and his flowers have been from Kota thus far.
Felix follows Kota to the little space of green area between the main building and the village council's building. The school house is on the other side of the village council offices, and there are dozens of pups of varying ages running around outside, some playing, some eating lunch. They seem to pay Felix and Kota no mind as they stop when Kota turns to face him, a nervous smile crossing his lips.
"I uh, I know this might be out of the blue, since we haven't really talked," Kota begins, "But I figured trying and possibly failing would be better than not trying at all, you know?"
Felix nods — he thinks he knows — but says nothing.
Kota laughs nervously. "I just wanted to ask — I know you've accepted someone's courting already, but I was hoping you'd be willing to accept mine, too?"
Felix blinks.
So… Kota isn't his secret admirer? But he knows Felix is being courted, and still wants to court Felix himself? Is that even allowed?
Before Felix can even think to say anything, Kota starts to ramble. He starts listing his good qualities, clearly trying to plead his case to Felix and talk himself up as a potential mate, to make himself a good contender, and —
"Felix?"
"Kota."
Felix has to lean to the side to be able to look around Kota's broad frame, and his eyes nearly bug out of his head when he sees who's standing there.
It's Seungmin, and with him is Jeongin — Chan's little brother.
The pack and village don't see much of Jeongin. The young alpha is the one in charge of the nursery and the school, who makes sure that the pups of the village are always taken care of and that they receive the education they need. Felix rarely sees Jeongin and Chan together, since their duties often keep them on separate ends of the village. Jeongin and Seungmin are extremely close, but even then, Felix has only interacted with him a handful of times. He doesn't join them for meals in the main building — Seungmin said it's because he usually stays inside the school house since he wants to be sure the pups get enough to eat — so Felix isn't sure why Jeongin is standing here right now.
"Oh, hi Jeongin," Kota says, frowning. "Can I help you?"
"Felix needs to eat," Jeongin says firmly. "He went out with the healers early this morning, and still has work after lunch. This isn't the time for a personal chat."
"It's not personal," Kota says, offended. "I was just —"
"C'mon, Felix," Seungmin says, ignoring Kota completely. He steps forward and grabs Felix's hand, leading him away from the other two and back toward the main building's entrance. He has no idea what's happening right now, but if there's anything Felix does know, it's when to keep his mouth shut and follow directions.
Seungmin is shaking his head as they walk, grumbling to himself about things Felix can't quite understand. Felix thinks he hears him say something like 'disrespectful' and 'completely inappropriate' and he frowns.
"Seungmin," he asks quietly. "Did I do something wrong?"
Seungmin stops and turns to him, completely bewildered. "What? No, Felix, absolutely not. You've done nothing wrong. Kota's just a dick."
Felix takes the chance to look backward, seeing Jeongin and Kota in a hushed but clearly heated exchange. "What did he do wrong?"
"It's complicated," Seungmin says, tone full of finality. "C'mon. Let's get you back to lunch."
It's far more noisy when they get back inside the main building, Seungmin leading him straight to their usual table. Felix notes the village council has now also arrived, and he tries to ignore Chan's curious stare. Hyunjin, Wooyoung, and Yeosang eye Felix cautiously, and so does San, who has clearly been informed of what's happened if the sour expression on his face is anything to go by.
"Are you alright?" San asks.
"I'm okay," Felix nods. He looks down and notes that his tangerine has been completely peeled.
Again, his instincts are telling him to look up, to find Chan's gaze, but he doesn't. He convinces himself it was one of his friends, and sits down.
"What did he want?" Wooyoung demands.
"He asked to be able to court Felix," Seungmin spits out as he sits down. Hyunjin pushes a tray of food toward him. "Can you believe that?"
"He did what?" San looks between Seungmin and Felix in disbelief.
Yeosang nudges him insistently. "What did you say?"
"I didn't say anything," Felix shakes his head. "Seungmin and Jeongin intervened before I could."
"Good," Hyunjin huffs. "I hope Jeongin claws his throat out."
Felix frowns. He doesn't understand what's going on — his own village never had a formal courting season, and from what he remembers, only one person could court another. It feels like that's the case here, but it also seems like there's a little more to it — so he keeps his mouth shut, returning to his lunch.
He's even more surprised when a few minutes later, Jeongin joins them at their table, sitting beside Seungmin and putting him directly across from Felix.
Jeongin smiles sheepishly at him. "Sorry for that, earlier. I hope I didn't worry you. Are you okay? Has he bothered you before?"
Felix blinks, shaking his head minutely. "No, today's the first time we've even spoken, actually."
"The nerve of some people," Wooyoung grumbles. "You're already being courted, never even spoken to him before, and he has the audacity to —"
"Woo," San murmurs softly, resting a hand on his back.
Wooyoung's mouth snaps shut, and he looks at Felix, embarrassed. "Sorry, Felix. I'm not mad at you."
"I know," Felix nods, and to Jeongin, he says, "You didn't worry me, and I'm okay. I appreciate your help."
"Would you have said yes?" Hyunjin suddenly asks. "If Jeongin hadn't intervened?"
Felix pauses. For the third time, he's overwhelmed with the need to look at Chan, but he refrains.
Chan has nothing to do with any of this.
He tries, for a brief moment, to imagine a life with Kota, to imagine being happy with him, and he can't. He's sure that Kota is a nice person, and will probably make a great mate for someone, but Felix is not that someone. Even when Kota asked, Felix knew in his heart he was going to turn him down.
Felix already has two people on his mind — his admirer, and Chan — and he didn't need a third, especially one Felix felt no connection to, felt no loyalty to.
"No," Felix answers honestly. "I wouldn't have. I don't know him. And I already have someone courting me."
"But you don't know your admirer, either," Jeongin points out.
Felix shrugs. "Maybe so, but I feel like I do. I don't know Kota."
That seems to be enough of an answer for everyone, because the tension in the air dissipates, and Jeongin is quick to shift the conversation to a funny story about something some of the pups did at school that morning. It's a nice distraction, and Felix manages to eat all of his lunch in the meantime, refusing to look up and see if Chan is monitoring his eating this time.
He and his friends clear their trash and dishes when they're done, and Felix notes the way that Jeongin heads straight for Chan instead of going back to the school house. There's something about the determination in Jeongin's stride, and the way the rest of his friends look after him, that tells Felix whatever Jeongin is going to his older brother about, it has to do with Felix and what happened with Kota, with whatever rule Kota has clearly broken.
It has Felix keeping his eyes straight ahead as he walks, heading toward the healers building alone.
He's really starting to dislike courting season.
── ⋆⋅𖤓⋅⋆ ──
It's easy for him to busy himself in the tea room with Taeyeon for the rest of the day, gathering all the newly dried herbs and helping her to sort them in their designated jars and containers, ensuring they keep track of what they have excess of, and what they may need to go out to collect more of in the coming days. Even after he's done, he asks to be able to help Taeyeon fill the tea orders for the villagers, so she lets him stay. He works on fulfilling orders until Taeyeon tells him he should go home for the day, saying he should rest and wash up.
He's reluctant to leave.
The village is certainly bigger than the one he grew up in, but it's still small enough that word spreads around quickly. Whether or not people know the whole story, he has no doubt that someone will be talking about what happened between him and Kota during lunch, about how the village leader and pack alpha's younger brother had to step in to save Felix from making a grave, stupid mistake.
Taeyeon must be able to sense his unease, because when she finds Felix sitting on a bench in the back area, his bag on his shoulder but no intention of moving, she holds her hand out.
"I'll walk you home," she says. "No one will bother you if you're with me, not unless they want to end up with a broken toe."
Felix doesn't doubt she's broken a few toes in her time, if the way people seem to give them a wide berth as she walks him home is anything to go by. She says nothing as they go along, just hums a nice melody that calms Felix's nerves.
When Taeyeon drops him off at his doorstep, she hugs him tightly before pulling away, squeezing his shoulder as she says, "You've had a long few days. I'm ordering you to not come into work tomorrow. Get some rest, relax, and enjoy some time on your own."
"But —"
"No buts," Taeyeon chastises, smoothing down his hair. "You've worked so hard since you've gotten here. You deserve to rest."
She leaves him with another hug and a reminder that he's banned from the healers building tomorrow, and Felix sighs once he's inside his cottage. He's still feeling unsettled about the day, so he goes about cleaning his space. He washes his sheets and some of his clothes, hanging them up on the clothesline outside to dry. It takes him a moment, but he scrubs his floors, even dusts out and brushes his rugs, cleans out his fireplace, and goes about tending to the little garden of wildflowers and vegetables he has in his front yard.
His housework keeps him busy for the rest of the afternoon. The sun sets and the sky goes from pink to purple when he hears the clock tower ring in the distance, signaling dinnertime, but he doesn't feel very inclined to join the rest of the village. There's some grains in his kitchen cabinets along with mushrooms and spinach growing in his front yard, and so he gathers what he needs, fills up his small pot, fires up his wood stove, and makes himself a quick bowl of porridge.
Prior to leaving his old village, he'd been learning and working on how to portion and prepare meals for just himself in preparation for his long journey to his new village, and though it's been awhile since he has needed to cook for himself, he's happy that his previous knowledge still exists, and that it ends up being mostly muscle memory.
Once his dinner is gone, he finds he's still a little hungry for more, but he doesn't have the energy left to cook anything else. Felix forces himself to just finish an extra glass of water and clean his dishes. He puts his tea kettle on his wood stove while he bathes and changes, and as his tea brews in his mug, he settles into his rocking chair once more, this time with his keepsake box in his lap as he re-reads his three letters.
How has it only been three days, and he feels like his entire last year in this village has been flipped upside down?
He holds onto the pendant of his necklace with one hand as he holds his letters in the other, a bittersweet feeling settling into his gut. His intent had been to try to figure out who had been courting him, and instead, all he'd gotten was a second person who wanted to court him, and probably swept into a scandal he had nothing to do with.
Felix glances out the window, past his collection of sunflowers, wishing desperately to the moon that his secret admirer would just make themselves known.
Please, just send them to me. He pleads. I don't think I can deal with another day of this.
He puts his letters and keepsake boxes away after a moment, resigning himself to finish his evening tea and go to bed early for once.
It's as he's drying his empty mug that he catches motion out of the corner of his eye. He looks up and through his kitchen window, surprised to see Chan coming into his little front yard. He's carrying something in one hand, a bag similar to Felix's slung across his body. He looks frazzled and worried, which can't be good. Felix beats him to the door, opening it while Chan's fist is raised mid air.
"Oh," Chan breathes, his hand falling to his side. "Hi, Felix."
"Hi Channie-hyung," Felix nods in deference. "Did you need something?"
Chan holds out something wrapped in a linen cloth, shaking his hand once so Felix takes it. "I saw you weren't at dinner tonight, so I wanted to make sure that you'd eaten something."
It feels like Felix's heart twists in his chest. "That's really nice of you. Thank you."
"It's nothing, really. I wanted to check on you, too." When Felix looks at him, confused, Chan frowns. "Jeongin told me about what happened with Kota, and Taeyeon said she walked you home after work. I just wanted to make sure you were alright."
"I see," Felix steps to the side, letting Chan into his home. He knows at this point Chan won't be satisfied with his verbal confirmation alone, so he takes Chan's bag as he toes off his boots near the door, padding into Felix's living area and taking a seat at his little kitchen table.
"Are you okay?" Chan repeats. "I… can imagine it was a bit of a surprise."
"I'm alright," he says as he hangs Chan's bag on the little hooks beside his door, next to where he hangs his own bag. "It was a surprise, but I think I was just… confused, more than anything. And a little embarrassed, after."
He joins Chan at the table, unwrapping the linen and finding a pretty thick sandwich, cut in half into two triangles. He smooths the napkin till its flat, then pushes one sandwich half towards Chan.
Chan freezes, glancing down at the sandwich half, then back to Felix's face. "That's for you, Felix."
"I had a little bit of porridge for dinner," Felix explains. "I couldn't possibly finish both halves tonight. You'd be doing me a favor."
Chan looks like he wants to disagree, but takes the sandwich half. He doesn't take his first bite until Felix does, keeping his eyes on Felix the entire time.
"Are you going to keep doing that every time I eat?" Felix asks eventually.
"Doing what?" Chan asks around a mouthful.
"Watching me," Felix explains, flicking his eyes up to him before returning his gaze to his sandwich. "Making sure I eat."
"I'm just —" Chan pauses, and even in the warm, low light of Felix's home, he can still see how Chan turns red. "You take such small bites, sometimes. And you share your food, a lot. It's not wrong, that you do, I just… I guess I just worry that you're not eating enough for yourself."
Felix blinks. He does tend to take small bites, but — "Have you been watching me eat this whole time?"
Chan splutters. "What? Uh — n-no, I mean I don't — I just —"
"Because me eating doesn't have anything to do with me not being able to sleep, or having nightmares. I'm fine with both, but especially with sleeping, thanks to you. And I appreciate your help, and your concern." Felix gets a little shy when he adds, "It's… really sweet of you. To care."
Chan's expression turns fond. "Of course I care, Felix."
"I-I know," Felix falters. "That's why you're a good leader."
If Felix had to define the expression that takes over Chan's face, he'd say it was pride. His flush deepens, and he ducks his head, finishing the last bite of his half of the sandwich. Felix finishes his own as well, and leans back in his chair, rubbing at his belly.
He sees the way Chan's eyes lift, how they track Felix's movements. Felix will chalk it up to alpha stuff — happy to provide, happy to be called a good leader, happy that Felix has eaten the food Chan brought for him — and nothing else.
"I… I also should have probably explained the courting stuff to you before it all happened." Chan says it like an apology, his eyes casting back downward. "That way you wouldn't have been surprised, or confused, or embarrassed."
"Channie-hyung," Felix frowns. "There's no way you could've known what was going to happen. What happened today wasn't your fault at all."
"It wasn't yours either," Chan's tone holds no room for argument. "You should know that, too. Kota should have known better than to do something like that, especially on a whim. It's not allowed, and it was careless and extremely unfair to you."
Felix shrugs. "Well, I never gave him an answer."
"Jeongin took care of it for you," Chan grumbles. "Kota won't be coming to you for an answer, or for anything else."
"Will you tell your brother thank you, for me?" Felix requests. "I don't usually see him every day, and I don't think I thanked him properly for his help, earlier."
"You don't need to, but I'll tell him anyway. For you."
"And thank you, too," Felix says earnestly. "For… all of your help. Last year, and now. I don't think I ever thanked you properly."
A light flush graces Chan's cheeks. "You don't have to thank me for any of that, Felix. I'm just glad I'm the one who can help."
A peaceful sort of silence falls on them then, and Felix is content to take advantage of it. After the day he's had, surely he's allowed to treat himself to something he wants, for once, and right now, he just wants to enjoy Chan's company for what it is — a caring leader providing care and comfort to a member of his village — without thinking about anything and everything else outside of his home.
Felix lets his eyes wander, and his gaze leads him to Chan's bag on the hook. He notes fabric peeking out, and gestures to it with his chin. "What'd you bring in your bag?"
"Extra clothes," Chan explains. "Just in case you felt like going on another late night run."
Felix laughs, but shakes his head. "No, no running tonight. For me, at least."
"I only planned to run if you did," Chan shrugs, then knocks on the table twice. "Which means it's time to get you to bed."
"Are you staying?" Felix asks. He doesn't even care that hope seeps into the question, that his need for Chan to say yes is all over his face.
Chan smiles at him anyway. "If you'll have me."
Felix almost laughs — Chan has no idea how much Felix wishes he could have him.
"I'd like that," and his permission may as well be a confession.
They both work to put out the fire in the fireplace as well as the wood stove, and Felix puts the linen cloth his sandwich had come in with the rest of his laundry he hadn't gotten to yet. He'll give it back to Chan eventually. They each take turns freshening up in Felix's bathroom, and when they're both back in Felix's bedroom, Felix can feel his night tea beginning to do its work, coursing through his veins and making his body sluggish.
By the time they both crawl into Felix's bed, Felix is exhausted. For a moment, he thinks he's just going to fall straight to sleep — since sleep has managed to come easier, thanks to his tea and to Chan's presence — but sleep doesn’t come to answer his call.
They're not intertwined like they were the previous night, but Felix doesn't mind. Chan is still close enough that Felix can feel his body heat, and for Felix, that has to be enough for now. He plays with the pendant of his necklace as they lay in bed, the only light in the room coming from the moonlight shining through the window.
He can hear the way Chan breathes, and can see out of the corner of his eye that he's still awake and staring at the ceiling. Felix turns on his side so he can look at Chan properly. It's more than he ever would have dreamed of doing a few nights ago, and he doesn't know how much longer Chan plans to keep this up, so he'll take advantage of this, too, while he can.
Still, there's something on his mind that he needs an answer to, and he has a feeling that Chan might be the only one to be completely honest with him about it.
"Chan?"
"Hm?"
"What Kota did was wrong, right? But, why isn't it allowed?"
Chan's head turns on his pillow to face Felix. There's a frown on his beautiful, full lips. "It's… it's technically allowed, if the person being courted is interested in more than one person. But it's frowned upon."
"Why?"
"Because the point of courting season is to find your mate. If someone knows that a person is being courted, and they decide to ask for the chance to court that person anyway, they clearly don't care about finding a mate, or care about the sanctity that comes with others being able to find their own mates. They just care about being the best, about the competition of it all, and finding a mate isn't about competition. It's about love, about finding your true mate, the person you're going to spend your life with."
Felix hums in understanding. Wolf hybrids mate for life, after all.
"It also can make you look bad, even if it's not the intention," Chan continues, turning on his side and giving Felix his full attention. "To ask that of you puts you in a tight spot. If you accept, it can be seen as disrespectful to who you're already being courted by, but if you reject Kota, it might be seen as a slight, which is unfair, because it's supposed to be about your choice. You didn't choose to be put in that position today, so Jeongin intervening was the best outcome."
"Because someone's already courting me," Felix assumes.
"Yes," Chan nods. His eyes cast down to Felix's chest, where his pendant is. Chan reaches out, tapping the crescent moon gently. "It suits you."
"I think so, too," Felix murmurs. "Chan?"
"Yes?"
"Would… wouldn't the person who's courting me be upset that you're here?" Felix frowns, brows furrowing. "That you're spending the night here — that you've been spending the night here — and looking after me like this?"
Chan's expression flickers between a smirk and a smile. In the end, his gaze is soft when he says, "No. I think they'll be fine."
── ⋆⋅𖤓⋅⋆ ──
When Felix wakes for the first time the next morning, it's far too early, and just a little cold. The sun is only beginning to creep over the horizon, and his bedroom is cast in a soft pink light. Chan is still there, sprawled out on his back, arms stretched out to the sides, and Felix, much to his delight and horror, is half-way on top of him.
The blankets have been kicked down to the foot of the bed, which explains the chill in the air, and Felix has an arm and a leg swung on top of the alpha beside him. Worse yet, sometime in the night Chan must have overheated, because his shirt is off, hanging off of the bed post closest to Chan's head, and so all Felix feels is warm, uninterrupted skin. It's worse than the night before, when Chan held him in his embrace, because now Felix can see everything, and Chan's heart beats steadily under his ear, a calming rhythm that has Felix two seconds away from purring.
Carefully, Felix tilts his head up, wanting to be able to look at Chan's face up close.
Felix swoons internally.
Why must he be so handsome?
It's almost unfair, especially since Felix feels the weight of his pendant, since he's sleeping on a pillowcase made by his admirer, since there are sunflowers given to him filling up his window, three letters tucked into his keepsake box like a secret. He's not supposed to want Chan this much, and certainly not like this.
But… he doesn't want to let go.
Chan's face was the first Felix had ever seen of anyone in this village. Chan was the one who made sure he settled in, taught him what he needed to know about his new home, got him set up with the healers, and introduced him to his friends.
Chan is who tethers Felix to this village. Chan is the one who matters the most to him.
Chan is the one he's in love with, and he'll take every moment with him that he can, while he can.
Felix scoots closer, clings to him tighter, and falls asleep once more.
── ⋆⋅𖤓⋅⋆ ──
When Felix wakes for the second time, the bed is cold, Chan is gone, and there's a rooster crowing in his yard.
He knows exactly which rooster it is, too.
He huffs, calling out to the offending beast, "Yah! Bbama! Let me sleep!"
In an instant, Felix freezes.
If Bbama's in his yard, then…
"My gift!"
Felix launches himself from his bed so fast he almost makes himself dizzy, but he can't find it in himself to care as he all but flings himself to his front door, ripping it open and looking for his gift and flowers.
He's careful to inspect them, making sure Bbama hasn't gotten to either of them. He heaves out a sigh when he finds both to be untouched, and then promptly gasps when he realizes what he's looking at.
There's… an entire box of sunflowers.
They're tucked into a wooden box, clearly made by one of the carpenters, filled corner to corner with more freshly cut sunflowers. When Felix bends down to inspect it closer, he finds that the cut flowers — at least two dozen of them — are being cushioned and supported by moss. He doesn't think this is the moss he collected yesterday with the other healers, it looks and feels different to the one they found at the area of the river they'd been at. This moss was harvested this morning, and after a gentle poke, Felix finds the moss is still damp — damp enough that it'll help to water all of the flowers in the box for the next day, at the least, and two days at most.
It's… incredibly thoughtful, and he's relieved at the consideration, given that he's running out of window space, and vases. There's a little bench in his front yard — elevated from the ground, located under a tall tree — so Felix places the wooden box there, shooing Bbama away with his foot as he goes.
He grabs his present and letter on the way back inside, double checking that his door is shut behind him — the last time Bbama was here and Felix didn't think to make sure his door was shut, the rooster decided he wanted to become a house pet — before he settled down at his kitchen table.
"My dearest Felix,
Forgive me if the flowers are a bit too much, but I couldn't help it. I felt it was necessary, given what you'd dealt with yesterday. I'm only sorry that I couldn't have been there to help you, to make sure that you knew right away that you'd done nothing wrong. I hope you don't think I'm upset with you, because I'm not. If anything, I'm upset on your behalf. This is your first courting season, and you shouldn't have to deal with something like that.
I'd like to remedy that by giving you a few extra things today, starting with your sunflowers. The sunflowers located at each corner of the box actually have roots, so I thought that if you'd like to, you could plant them in your garden. I'm sure you know this already, but sunflowers can be good for soil, and can help to attract all of the helpful little critters who help to ensure flowers, fruits, and vegetables can grow. They're bound to grow very tall, of course, so be sure that if you do plant the rooted flowers, they get lots of sun, and have plenty of space to grow.
I hope that you've also decided to plant your roots here. It's been nearly a year since you've arrived, and I can't possibly think about the future of this village without you in it. I don't think I'd be able to look at sunflowers the same way ever again, if you left. I don't want to force you, or to try to convince you to stay just for me, but it would be disingenuous of me if I didn't tell you that if you left, you'd be taking my heart with you.
And so, for your gift today, I leave my heart in your hands. It may smell a little bit like lavender, so I hope you don't mind it. Feel free to carry it around in your pocket, maybe tuck it under your pillow, or keep it in your bag, if you want. All I ask is that you keep it close to you. Take care of it well, Felix, and I promise I'll take care of yours in return.
My sunflower, my moonflower, my heart — I hope you have a wonderful day. Know that I'll be thinking of you every second."
When Felix opens his gift, he can't help but be touched. He laughs softly to himself, admiring his "heart," before he can't contain himself anymore. With gentle fingers, he lifts the heart from the package. It's a heart for sure, made from what looks like cut fabric from a red shirt, sewn perfectly around the edges. When Felix brings it to his nose, it does indeed smell like lavender, but there's something else there, possibly the scent of his admirer, but it's muted and overwhelmed by lavender. Felix finds the combined scents to be calming more than anything. He presses his nose into it just a bit deeper, then rubs the fabric against his cheek, just the slightest bit.
He feels a bit like a fraud, accepting such a grand gesture, especially when Chan's scent still lingers on his sleep clothes. Felix brings the heart and his letter back to his bedroom, tucking both into his keepsake box before heading to his bathroom to freshen up. When he comes back into his room to make his bed, he notices that Chan's shirt is still hanging on the bed post.
And… well…
Felix is meant to stay home all day, so…
He puts it on without a second thought, heading into his living area going about gathering his laundry. He plans to use his free day to continue cleaning, maybe stopping by the carpenters workshop to see if they have any extra small couches he could have to add to his living room. It's the last piece of furniture that he's missing, and while his admirer had no way to know this, Felix is planning on putting down roots here.
He may not be pack, he may not have Chan, but this village is his home now. He doesn't think he'd be able to leave, not when he's already attached to his friends, and to the village leader.
Bbama crows loudly outside.
Felix groans. He tucks his pendant into the collar of Chan's shirt, shrugs on his work coat and makes sure his handkerchief's embroidery is still on display. With one cursory glance around his cottage, he heads to his laundry bin, grabbing the linen cloth from last night and heading into the yard. Bbama's still there, pecking at the grass, and he shakes his head.
"Alright buddy, time to bring you home."
── ⋆⋅𖤓⋅⋆ ──
"Bbama!" Jisung exclaims. "You got out again?!"
Felix shakes his head as Jisung takes Bbama, still wrapped in the linen cloth, securing him under his arm as he walks him back to the chicken coop.
Jisung's farm is a little down the road from Felix's cottage, and since Felix moved in, Bbama's been the main escapee, often wandering into Felix's yard in search of bugs or other food. Felix always brings him home, mostly because he knows Jisung owns far too many chickens and roosters to keep track of at this point.
Felix follows him to the coops out back, making sure Jisung actually secures Bbama in the coop with his hens this time, and laughs lightly when Jisung turns to him with an apologetic expression.
"Minho made muffins today," Jisung smiles. "I'd be happy to offer you some as a thank you."
"I'd like that," Felix nods, and follows Jisung into their home.
Minho's the third member of Chan's second in command, and one of the main cooks in the village — and technically Wooyoung's boss — and he and Jisung have been mated for about five years now. They mated early because Minho courted Jisung early, and they both run the farm now. The farm takes up most of Minho's time since it helps to provide some of the food for the village. When Felix first moved, Minho had personally delivered meals to the temporary bungalow Felix had stayed in so that he had something to eat, since he didn't feel comfortable eating in the main building right away.
Felix likes Minho. He's quiet, keeps to himself, does what he needs to do, but is also fiercely protective of the people he cares most about — Jisung being his top priority, of course — and has a great sense of humor that Felix enjoys. Jisung works with the carpenters sometimes, and when he's not tending to the farm, he likes being able to help build things for others. When Chan had Felix's cottage ready and helped him move in, he told Felix that Jisung built most of the furniture, including his favorite rocking chair, bed-frame, and his nightstand.
They dodge one of Jisung's in-progress projects — he tends to work on things at home more than he does at the carpenters workshop — as they head to the kitchen, where Minho is, cutting up some apple slices.
He smiles when he sees Felix, and Felix squeals dramatically, flinging himself at the beta and squeezing him tight.
Minho allows it for all of three seconds. "Oh, gross Felix!"
Felix frowns as he pulls away. "Hey, it's not my fault your stinky rooster escaped to my yard."
"Not that," Minho frowns as he turns, putting his knife in the sink. "You stink like an alpha, not a rooster."
"I do not!" Felix practically squawks, indignant. He looks at Jisung, feeling betrayed. "Do I smell like an alpha?"
The other beta smiles sheepishly. "I didn't want to say anything. I know you've got your secret admirer, and all."
"Clearly not a secret anymore," Minho scoffs, gesturing to Felix. "Since Chan scent marked you to hell and back like the knothead he is."
Felix pouts. "I have not been scent marked. And he's not a knothead! Besides, is scent marking taboo around here or something?"
"Yes," Jisung and Minho deadpan.
Felix blinks. "Oh?"
"It's a little…" Minho inhales through his clenched teeth, trying to find the right words. "Barbaric?"
"Barbaric?" Felix parrots. It certainly wasn't barbaric where he came from.
Jisung rests a hand on Felix's shoulder. "It just isn't really… appropriate. It's fine for mated couples, since there's not really a way around it. But when you're courting? Scent-marking is a little bit over the top. "
"A little?" Minho laughs. "More like a lot."
"Well," Felix shakes his head. "If I smell like I've been scent marked by an alpha, it's not because Chan is courting me. It's because this isn't my shirt. It's Channie-hyung's."
Jisung's eyes bug out wide. "It's — what?!"
"Why are you wearing Channie hyung's shirt?" Minho demands, then smirks. "Unless —"
"No." Felix shakes his head. He swipes an apple slice, biting down and letting the crisp flesh snap between his teeth.
"No?" Jisung asks as he steps closer, sniffing Felix lightly. "Because it really does smell like —"
"He's been sleeping over at night," Felix huffs. "Just sleeping. He was on patrol the other night when I woke up in the middle of the night. He's just been making sure I get to bed okay."
"Why is he sleeping over if he just wants to make sure you get to bed okay?" Minho counters, handing an apple slice to Jisung.
"I had a nightmare," Felix explains. He takes the bowl of apple slices when Minho hands it to him, following the couple to their kitchen table. "The night he was on patrol. He's been staying the night ever since to make sure I don't have any more."
Jisung's brow furrows in confusion. He opens his mouth to say something, but Minho stuffs an apple slice between his teeth instead, putting a hand under his chin and pushing it up, making Jisung chomp down onto the fruit.
"That's very nice of Chan to do that," Minho nods, pushing the bowl of fruit toward Felix. "I'm glad he's been helping you."
"Yeah," Jisung says around his mouthful. "Very nice."
"Anyway," Felix says pointedly, "I returned Bbama, so I wanted to ask you for something in exchange."
"Name it," Jisung says happily, chewing on another apple slice.
"Do you have any extra sofas in the workshop? Something small enough to fit my place, preferably."
Jisung smiles. "Funny you should ask."
── ⋆⋅𖤓⋅⋆ ──
Felix stares at the sofa.
"This is… brand new."
Jisung nods. "It is."
Felix points to the little wooden plaque propped up by the cushion on the back of the sofa, where his name is written in big letters. "Why is my name on it?"
"Because it's yours." Jisung smiles, picking up the plaque. "Chan asked me to build it for you, since we didn't have any extras laying around, and no one was getting rid of theirs at the time. He said when you moved in that you didn't think you'd need one, so he asked us to keep it here and take care of it in the meantime, just in case you ended up deciding that you wanted one."
Felix can't help but smile. "That's… really nice of him."
"Yes," Minho says knowingly. "Very nice."
"I don't think I can carry this back to my place," Felix says honestly. "Does it come apart?"
"Don't even worry about that," Jisung waves him off. "We have a truck out back. I think they're out at the healers building right now helping Taeyeon with something, but when they get back, I'll have Mingyu and Jihoon load it onto the bed, and they'll drop it off at your place this afternoon."
"Thank you, Jisung," Felix smiles, squeezing his arm. "I really appreciate your help."
"Don't thank me," Jisung gives him a toothy smile. "Thank Channie-hyung. It was his idea."
── ⋆⋅𖤓⋅⋆ ──
Felix spends most of his day off with Jisung. Minho leaves a little before lunch to head to the main building and make sure the lunch service goes smoothly, and Felix stays with Jisung at the farm, eating sandwiches and fruit for lunch instead. He helps Jisung out a bit at the farm while he's there, mostly just watering the crops and picking some of the berries that have already managed to grow and ripen.
Seungmin ends up stopping by a little before dinner, saying Minho sent him to see if Felix would be interested, but Felix declines going to dinner in the main building, too. Seungmin looks like he has something to say about that, but ultimately keeps quiet, and even ends up staying for dinner himself. Jisung's not the best cook, but the dinner of steak and potatoes he makes seems to be decent enough.
Seungmin ends up walking Felix home, and when they get there, Felix is only half surprised to see Chan standing in his front yard, his bag slung across his body like the night before, hands in his pockets as he glances down at Felix's box of sunflowers.
Felix feels… almost embarrassed, a little guilty, even, knowing Chan's looking at a gift he received from someone else.
He says goodbye to Seungmin, who simply gives Felix a knowing look as he heads home himself, waving briefly at Chan as he goes. When Felix heads into his yard, he gives Chan a teasing smile.
"You're a little early tonight, aren't you?"
"Long day, I guess." Chan smiles, then blinks. He holds up a finger, pointing at Felix when he asks, "Is that my shirt?"
"Um," Felix looks down to hide his face, "No? I think it's mine."
"Huh," Chan says, "Alright."
"Yeah," is all Felix can come up with.
Thankfully, they head inside together, so he's saved from having to elaborate any further. It's a little chilly since Felix hasn't been home all day, but Chan doesn't seem to mind. He does notice the newest addition to his home, though.
"You finally got a couch!" Chan sounds happier about it than Jisung did. "It looks so nice."
"Yeah," Felix smiles. "I asked Jisung if the workshop had any extras. He told me this one had been waiting for me, and that it was thanks to you."
"Oh," Chan flushes, "I mean, I didn't do anything, really. I just asked Jisung for his help, and —"
"Channie-hyung," Felix says gently, and Chan's mouth clacks shut. "Thank you."
"You're welcome, Felix." The flush on his cheeks deepen, and suddenly he's moving, hanging his bag on a coat hook, then heads straight for Felix's wood stove. He grabs a few pieces of kindling and begins stacking them. "Go wash up," Chan tells him, keeping his eyes on his task, "I can take care of this."
Felix hangs his work coat on the hook, then heads into his bedroom without a fuss. He's quick to bathe and change into different sleep clothes, emerging from his room to find Chan at his kitchen counter, stirring a spoon into Felix's favorite mug.
"Just in time," Chan smiles. "Tea's ready."
It should be laughable, how quickly Felix moves to take a seat at his kitchen table, but there's no one but him, Chan, and the moon here to witness the way his eager heart reacts.
Hmph.
Oh. Well — him, Chan, the moon, and his omega. His omega, who's pretty chuffed when Felix takes the first sip of his tea, trotting around happily.
Our Alpha's taking care of us so well.
Felix doesn't have the heart to correct her.
"I'll go wash up while you drink that," Chan rests a hand on Felix's shoulder, squeezing it once as he goes. He grabs a bundle of clothing from his bag, then heads to Felix's room. He's quick about bathing and changing too, and once he's out, Felix has moved to the couch, his feet tucked underneath him as he tries to finish his tea.
Chan joins him, resting one arm along the back of the couch. "You've finally got all of your furniture."
"I do," Felix nods, taking another sip. "Felt like it was time, you know? Especially since I seem to have a frequent house guest, as of late."
"Ahhh," Chan nods, "So you're trying to be a good host?"
"Well, considering you tried to sleep on the rocking chair…"
Chan smirks, shaking his head. "I was trying to be considerate. And technically, I've been sleeping in your bed since then. Is this your way of telling me you want me to sleep on the couch?"
"I mean," Felix frowns a little. "If… if you wanted to. Or if you're uncomfortable, then —"
Chan sits up, leaning forward a little as he rests his hand on Felix's knee. "I'm not uncomfortable. Besides, can't help you with your nightmares if I'm out here, and you're in there, right?"
All Felix can do is nod, because his focus is on the warmth of Chan's palm on his skin, on where his thumb is rubbing in soothing motions, and he has to take a large sip of tea to distract himself, to try to focus on keeping his scent under control.
"Minho said you ate at his house today," Chan says offhandedly. "Did you get enough to eat? I hope Jisung didn't mess up dinner for you."
Felix laughs. "I had plenty to eat, and Jisung did fine. It's hard to mess up steak and potatoes."
Chan scoffs. "You'd be surprised. He messed up a sandwich once, and Changbin was sick for two days."
"Are you saying I'll be sick for the next two days?" Felix giggles a little, holding his mug close for warmth.
"I'd take care of you," Chan insists. It's meant to be lighthearted, but it feels heavier, especially when Chan's expression makes it seem like he's dead serious. Felix blinks, bringing his mug up to cover the smile he's trying to fight off. Chan pats his knee, scooting forward a little. "Finish your tea, little one. It's almost time for bed."
A nod is all Felix can manage. His words get stuck in his throat, awestruck and thoroughly confused by Chan once more. Anyone with eyes can see what's going on between them isn't normal, but Felix isn't exactly sure what it is in the first place.
Courting season is truly such a strange endeavor.
He finishes his tea, and Chan takes his mug, sending him to bed while he cleans the dish. When Chan joins him in bed, he shucks off his shirt, hanging it on the bed post like he did last night. Felix is lying on his side, watching it all happen, and to his own surprise, he doesn't look away as Chan gets into bed on his side, watching Felix watch him.
"Taeyeon wanted me to tell you not to come in tomorrow, either," Chan says quietly. "Since it's Friday, and all. She wants you to take the weekend to rest, come back on Monday."
Felix narrows his eyes at Chan. "You're not lying about that, are you? Because if she hunts me down tomorrow, I'll tell her it was you, and she'll break your toe."
Chan laughs. "Ah, so she's mentioned she's a toe breaker has she? That's good. But no, I'm not lying. She found me after lunch, made it very clear I had to give you the message myself."
"That's really sweet of her," Felix muses, curling up more under the covers.
"Yeah," Chan snorts, "I didn't think she knew how to do that, but she clearly likes you. Everyone who knows you likes you."
Felix feels his cheeks heat, and he tries to subtly pull his blankets up higher. "I don't think that's true."
"True enough that someone tried to steal you away during courting season."
"The key word there is 'tried,'" Felix points out. "He didn't get very far." Chan grumbles in response, and Felix moves his leg forward, nudging at Chan's shin. "Besides, I would have told him no, anyway."
Chan blinks at him. "You would have?"
"Yeah," Felix nods. "I don't — I wouldn't have felt comfortable, and I don't know him, certainly not well enough to accept."
"But —" Chan cuts himself off, looking hesitant.
Felix nudges him with his foot once more. "But?"
"You don't know who it is that's courting you, either," Chan points out, looking slightly uncomfortable. "Would you say no to them, if you knew who they were?"
"No," Felix says easily. Because he wouldn't.
"But… why?" Chan looks like he doesn't want to ask, but he still wants to know anyway. "You don't know who they are — what if you find out, and you don't want to accept them the same way?"
Felix takes a moment to think. He wants to tell Chan so much. He wants to say the only thing that would change what's happening is Chan himself, but he can't. So he chooses to be honest, to tell Chan the truth, even if him saying it feels like a betrayal of his own desires.
"I feel like I know them," Felix explains. "I feel like they know me. I feel like… like they see me, in a way I've never even seen myself. And they… the way that they say they feel about me is — it's familiar, I guess."
Chan blinks. "Familiar?"
"Yeah," Felix goes a little quiet. "I uh, I know what it's like. To feel how they feel. To, um, to love someone."
"You do?" Chan asks, adjusting the pillow he's using. Felix doesn't know if Chan scoots closer, or if he's just imagining things.
Felix looks right at him, completely unafraid when he says, "Yes. I do."
"And that's why you said yes?" Chan guesses. "Why you chose to stick with them over Kota?"
Felix just nods. He doesn't have the guts to say that he doesn't feel like he's choosing his admirer, right now, especially not when the truth of it all hits him so fiercely that it makes his gut twist with guilt, regret, and shame.
He doesn't want Kota, but he doesn't really want his admirer, either.
Because even with his head laying on the pillow they embroidered, with the sunflowers he's cut and collected scattering his kitchen and in his garden, with the pendant they made him around his neck, and their admirer's heart in his keepsake box along with his letters, his mind isn't on his admirer at all, it's on the alpha in front of him.
It's Chan — it's always going to be Chan.
Chan, who makes it worse when he says, "You're very loyal, Felix."
Because he is — he's just loyal to the wrong person, even if Chan is the right person, in his eyes, and in his heart.
Felix makes a promise to himself — tonight, he'll enjoy this. He'll let Chan hold him, fill his senses with Chan's scent, find comfort in his body heat, in his heartbeat under his ear, a steady rhythm that lulls him to sleep — in the morning, he'll set this right.
── ⋆⋅𖤓⋅⋆ ──
Felix feels uneasy, waking up and finding Chan gone again. It should be no different than the last few mornings, but because he knows what he's about to do, it nearly makes him sick.
The feeling only increases when he realizes that Chan's scent is everywhere in his home, not just left behind on his shirt, which he'd accidentally left behind again, hanging on the bed post near his side of the bed.
His heart twists inside his ribcage — Chan has a side of the bed. Of Felix's bed.
He really needs to fix this.
Getting his gift, letter, and another beautiful bouquet of sunflowers mixed in with wildflowers of varying colors fills him with bittersweet happiness.
"My dearest Felix,
I hope you're getting some much needed rest. The village doesn't feel as warm or as lively when I can't see you throughout the day, but I feel better knowing you're taking care of yourself. Your well-being means more to me than you could ever know.
Do you like the flower arrangement? I'm sure you noticed the additions to your sunflower bouquet this morning. You probably know this, too, but sunflowers and wildflowers work well together. Bees, hummingbirds, and butterflies are attracted to the pollen and help to fertilize the flowers, and in turn, contribute to the bounty of our harvest and crops. I tried to pick some of the wildflowers that you use often with the healers. Hopefully, when the blooms dry out, you can make use of them.
Forgive me if your gift today is a little, well, strange. My intention was to give you another part of the village, something you'd be able to hold on to for a long time, like your pendant. I know that your home village was somewhere near the beach and warm all year round. I heard you mention before how there were seashells everywhere, how sand on the beach was soft and fine, and how it made for the best sandcastles.
We don't have seashells, or the same kind of sand, and we can't make sandcastles out of what we have, but I know someone as beautiful as you can appreciate some of the beauty of our waterways just fine.
I don't know what the future holds, but I do know I want you in mine. No matter whether we remain here, or go elsewhere, I hope you'll carry a piece of this place with you always.
Be well, my heart."
His gift is wrapped carefully in a smooth fabric, resting on a bed of hay. Felix is gentle as he opens up the fabric, finding a little glass vial, the cork sealed with wax, and inside the vial, sand from the river, along with a little bit of river water.
Felix gasps, clutching the vial carefully as he bolts to his nightstand drawer. It's a bit of a struggle, taking out his keepsake box and opening it with one hand, but when he does, it only takes him seconds to find what he's looking for.
An almost identical vial, one with sand and ocean water from his home village, sealed with wax.
He's only ever shown this vial to one person before — Chan.
But it… it can't be. How could his admirer possibly have known about this? How could they have known that Felix would even appreciate something like this if Chan hadn't told them about it himself?
Has… has Chan been helping Felix's admirer this whole time? Does Chan know who he is? Has Chan been doing all of this — taking care of Felix, spending time with him, looking after him — for his admirer's benefit? To tell him things about Felix that he might not know? It would make sense — Chan knows that Felix trusts him, that Felix opens up to him because he's known Chan first, so of course he would be able to get Felix to talk, to find out what would be good to give him so Felix would feel inclined to accept the courting offer.
Felix feels like he's going to be sick.
He tucks both vials away, rifling through his box to find the one thing he needs right now — his childhood necklace — and rushes through getting ready. He grabs Chan's shirt to wear because it's closest to him, shrugs on a pair of pants on the floor, throws on his work-coat, and smashes his socked feet into his boots as he bolts out the door, his necklace held tight in his fist as he sprints towards Minho and Jisung's farm.
He needs their help if he's going to put a stop to this.
── ⋆⋅𖤓⋅⋆ ──
"So," Minho raises a brow, pushing a cup of water across the kitchen table for Felix. "What did you want to talk to us about?"
Felix hesitates. "Has there… in your pack, in the village, has there ever been an instance where someone has accepted someone else's courting and then… changed their mind?"
"Uh," Jisung scratches his nose, turning his head to look at Minho. "Not… really? I mean, I'm sure it's happened, and it is allowed under specific circumstances, but it's not common."
"Is there a reason you're asking?" Minho rests his elbows on the table as he leans forward. "Did something happen?"
"Not exactly," Felix looks at them both. "If I tell you both, will you promise to just… hear me out?"
Jisung says, "Yes," at the same time that Minho says, "It depends."
Jisung looks at his mate, betrayed. "Jagi."
"I only say that because if it is something bad, we have a duty to report it."
"It's not bad!" Felix insists, but immediately backtracks. "Well, at least, I don't think it is. That's why I'm asking."
"Why don't you just tell us?" Jisung offers helpfully, resting a hand on Felix's arm.
He takes a deep breath. He's never actually said it out loud before, and he's only been sitting with the reality of the situation for a night. Now that the moment has come, he's a little nervous, but he figures if he just comes right out with it, it won't be as bad.
So he closes his eyes, takes a deep breath, and tells his friends the truth.
"I don't want to be courted by my secret admirer anymore because I don't want to be with them. Or well, I can't be with them, because I can't return their feelings. I think this might come as a shock to you both, but it's because I have feelings for Chan. I'm in love with him — I think I have been since I got here, and I want to court him, but I also think he might know who my admirer is, and I think he might have been helping them come up with what gifts to give me this whole time so that I would say yes in the first place, but I don't want to say yes anymore because I don't want to be with my admirer, I want to be with Chan, so I just — I want this to stop, and I need you both to tell me how."
Silence.
He peeks one eye open, finding Jisung and Minho caught between staring at each other and Felix. He can't make sense of the expressions on their face, and a small pit of dread forms in his stomach.
"So, let me get this straight," Minho turns to face Felix, counting off on his fingers. "You're in love with Chan. You think Chan has been helping your secret admirer court you this entire time because he would be able to figure out how to guarantee that you would say yes and accept. Now that you have accepted, you've realized you don't actually want to be with your admirer in the end, and you want us to tell you what to do to get your courting to stop, so that you can court Chan instead. Did I get that right?"
Felix nods, too afraid to speak, worried about being judged, about whether or not he's making a grave mistake or committing a social sin in the eyes of the village and the pack.
"Well," Minho exhales through his nose. "I hate to break it to you, but I don't actually know. My courting experience is pretty cut and dry, and no one we know has rejected someone's courting after they've accepted it. I know that there is a way, I'm just not sure what it is, or how you'd go about it."
"You should just ask Chan," Jisung says, shrugging. "Like you said, he knows who's courting you, after all."
Felix blinks. "He — he does? I just assumed, but — he really knows?"
"Jagi," Minho groans. "You promised."
"Promised what?" Felix demands, looking between the betas. "Promised Chan? What did you promise? To whom?!"
Jisung looks at Felix sheepishly. "Sorry, Lix. He's right, I did promise, so I can't say more than that."
"But I —"
"Felix," Minho smiles sweetly. "Ask Chan for help. I know it might feel awkward, given the circumstances, but Jisung is right — if what you want is for the person who's courting you to stop courting you, then Chan is the one you need to talk to about it all."
Felix wants to smack himself in the face. He had a feeling Chan would know the answer. It's a little… inconvenient, though, to have to bring something like this to Chan's attention, to ask him for something like this. It would be a perfect storm, too, wouldn't it? Felix getting his answer only for him to what — make his declaration to Chan and live happily ever after? It sounds like a disaster, which is the exact opposite of what he wants.
Jisung looks at Minho, confused. "But, wouldn't hyung just —"
Minho elbows him in the side, wrapping him into his embrace and muffling Jisung's cry of pain with a gentle hand over his mouth. To Felix, he says, "Go find Chan."
Felix nods, and he tucks his necklace into the pocket of his work coat before he takes off into a run, bolting out of Jisung's home and making a mad dash towards the center of the village. The council building's door is open, so Felix runs inside, bypassing Jihyo at the front desk with a quick, "Hi!" as he runs towards where he knows Chan's office is.
He knocks on the door a bit frantically, and it opens a second later. Seonghwa blinks when he sees Felix, but seems to sense his urgency, because he takes a step to the side, ushering Felix into the office.
"Alpha," he pants when he spots Chan, trying desperately to catch his breath.
Chan frowns at him, standing from his seat. "Felix? What's wrong? Did something happen? Are you okay?"
"I need to talk to you," Felix swallows, looking pointedly at the other council members, then back to Chan. "Alone. I… I need your help."
"Leave," Chan commands sharply. There's an alpha's weight behind it, and it almost makes Felix's knees buckle. He frowns, hurt by the command, but just as he goes to stumble away, he hears the others, hears the retreat of their footsteps, and the door shuts behind them.
They're alone.
"Come sit," Chan encourages, guiding Felix to the little sofa in his office. Felix sits down, trying to catch his breath, and he finds it to be a lot easier to do once Chan sits next to him.
"Are you hurt?" Chan asks, resting a hand on his shoulder and turning Felix to look at him. "Did something happen?"
"Yes — well, no, not exactly? I just — I need to ask you something."
"You can ask me anything, Felix, you know that." Chan says softly.
Felix nods. He takes a deep breath, preparing himself, but the words still come out rushed. "I want to know how to reject the person who's courting me."
Chan blinks. He blinks again, then stares at Felix in disbelief, his hand falling from his shoulder. "You — what?"
"I want to know how to reject the person who's courting me," Felix repeats. "I-I want them to stop. I don't want them to court me anymore, and I want to know how to… how to do that."
A flush creeps up Chan's neck. "But… it's only been five days? We're only five days into courting season, Felix. I don't understand. I thought you were happy with who's been courting you?"
"I am," Felix nods, "I've been really happy with them."
"Then… what's changed?" Chan looks completely lost.
Felix's nerves return, and he stands, beginning to pace. "Okay, so. Nothing's changed, really, if I'm being honest, which sounds like just the worst thing, doesn't it? But I just —" he laughs, well aware he sounds practically hysterical. "I just realized something too late, I think. And it's not their fault. They've been really lovely, and I know their feelings for me are strong, and genuine, but I… I don't think I can return them. And I don't want to lead them on. It's not fair to them, not when I can't reciprocate."
Chan continues to stare, and after a moment, he seems to nod, his expression morphing into something… stern.
"I see," Chan nods. He rests his elbows on his knees, directing his gaze to the floor. "I um, I can talk to them. Let them know."
Felix stops pacing. "So you… you do know who they are? Minho and Jisung weren't lying?"
"No," Chan mutters, then pauses, looking up at Felix. "You spoke to Minho and Jisung?"
"I did," he nods. "I went to ask them about it, since I figured they would know how to help me, but they said I needed to talk to you, because you know who my secret admirer is. I… I told them that I realized you might have been helping them, after the gift I received today, and they said that you have been."
"Ah. I see," Chan sighs, running a hand down his face.
Felix fidgets. He looks at Chan, really looks at him, and frowns when he takes in how… upset Chan seems to be.
"Wait," Felix says, taking a step towards him. "Is that — does that break a rule, of some kind? Is that not allowed, or —"
"You can do whatever you want, Felix," Chan says, but his tone is flat. "Just…what should I tell them? When I talk to them. Is there anything you want them to know? Anything that they've done wrong maybe, that they should know about?"
"Yes," Felix takes another deep breath, planting his feet. He says a brief prayer to the moon, looking directly at Chan when he says, "Tell them that I've decided to court someone else. And if they ask who, tell them that it's you. Because it is you. I've decided to court you, Chan."
The silence that fills the room is overwhelming. Felix's heart feels like it's in his throat and at his feet all at once. Even his omega, who tends to be uninterested in these things, stirs from within his belly, turning in circles in discomfort.
Chan's head snaps up suddenly, his eyes zeroing in on Felix. His expression is… not what Felix anticipated. He looks both relieved and shocked all at once.
"Me?"
Felix smiles, though it's shaky, and he definitely feels like crying about it, but he nods all the same. "You, Chan. I don't — I don't want to be courted by someone else. And I understand if you don't accept my courting, I do. I know this is probably so out of the blue for you, and you're probably already promised to someone much better, someone who you've known since forever, someone in your pack. It probably doesn't help that you've been helping my secret admirer with courting me, and — oh goodness, you must think I'm such an ungrateful brat about it, and if you don't want me to court you, you can say so, and I'll walk away right now and you can pretend like we've never had this conversation. I just felt like you deserved to know the truth, because I think since the very first day I got here, I fell in lo —"
It happens so quickly. Chan shoots up from his seat before Felix can even blink, and suddenly, he is being kissed.
Chan is kissing him.
Anything Felix had left to say, any remaining thought in his head completely dissipates. Every fiber in his being zeroes down to just this — just Chan. Only Chan. Chan here, in front of him, cradling Felix's face in his hands, kissing him, and everything that that means.
Chan walks them backwards until he's pressed against the wall, and then he crowds in close, pressing his body so tightly to Felix's that for a moment, he wonders if Chan's strong enough to press them both through the wall altogether. Felix melts into him, sighing through his nose as he gives in, letting his omega go belly up in submission, handing over the reins of control right into Chan's hands. His own hands come to rest on Chan's forearms if only to brace himself, to hold onto something tangible so he knows that this isn't a dream.
Felix has never been kissed like this in his life. He's never been so thoroughly ravaged by just a kiss alone, has never been able to register the way his knees shake, the way Chan seems to give Felix everything but take nothing for himself. As their lips move — as Chan's tongue lightly touches at the seam of Felix's lips, as Felix opens up beneath him to let himself be devoured — he feels the way his heart begins to beat harder, can smell how his scent slowly begins to seep out into the room, and the wetness that begins to form between his legs surely doesn't help his case.
Chan must be able to sense it as well, because then he tears his mouth away from Felix's in a gasp and rests his forehead against his, their heavy breathing the only sound Felix can hear over his heartbeat.
"You can't say it first," Chan pleads, his voice soft. "I swore I'd tell you first."
"Tell me what?" Felix keeps his voice just as soft, afraid that if he speaks any louder, he'll break this already fragile moment.
"I love you," Chan murmurs. "I love you, Felix. I've been in love with you since the second you broke through the treeline, the second I laid eyes on you."
Felix's eyes begin to water. "You love me?"
"I love you," Chan tips his head down, kissing him softly. "And I accept your courting… on one condition."
Felix nods eagerly, holding tight to his forearms to kiss him again. "Anything."
"You reconsider rejecting the person who's courting you." When Felix frowns, the corner of Chan's mouth quirks up in a smile. "I worked hard on your gifts, you know. And courting season is supposed to last until the end of the month."
Felix's entire world is flipped upside down.
"You —" He blinks, grip loosening on his arms. "You? It's — you're my secret admirer?"
"Surprise," Chan whispers, lips brushing against Felix's as he speaks.
"It's been you this whole time?" Felix asks, his voice getting smaller.
Chan nods, kissing him once more, rubbing his cheek along Felix's. "It's me, my heart."
Tears well up in Felix's eyes, "I don't understand. Why —"
"I was afraid," Chan confesses. "I was the person you met first, I'm the pack alpha, leader of the village — I didn't want you to feel pressured to say yes if I just courted you outright. I didn't want you to say yes if you didn't mean it. Especially since we haven't talked much since you settled in, and I thought if I asked you one on one, you would've been blindsided. I wanted you to know how I felt, but I didn't want to overwhelm you, so I made the choice to court you anonymously. I thought that maybe, if I could tell you how I felt that way, if I could make myself out to be a good choice for you, that you'd want to choose me for sure."
"So," Felix's brow furrows, "Were you — you came around a lot more, once I accepted. Was that —"
Chan smiles, a little embarrassed. "I'd heard from everyone about how much you liked your gloves, but I wanted to see it for myself. That first night I slept over, I really was on patrol, but when I saw your sunflower in the window, and the smoke from your fireplace, I couldn't resist."
Felix shakes his head, his eyes filling with tears. It's weak, but he pounds his fist against Chan's chest in complaint. "I felt so guilty these past few days. I didn't think you and I had a chance, and I really tried to keep my mind on who my admirer might be, but I kept thinking about you instead. I thought I was going to be exiled."
Chan laughs. "I'd never let anyone do that to you. This is your home, Felix, just as much as it is mine." He tilts Felix's head upwards to lock their gazes together. "And you always had a chance with me. I'm not promised to anyone, and there's no one else I've ever even been remotely interested in. You're the first person I've ever courted, little one, the only one I've ever wanted to court."
Felix blinks, smiling uncontrollably and unable to hide the flush on his cheeks. "Did you really work on my gifts for an entire year?"
"I have a list of them in my pocket," Chan nods, "In order, from your first gift to your last, meant to last the entire duration of the season."
"No wonder you were so busy all of a sudden after I settled in," Felix teases. "You were making me an entire month's worth of gifts."
"I'd do it again," Chan swears.
"And your shirts?" Felix needs to know. "You left them behind on purpose these last two days?"
The alpha smirks. "Of course I did. You may not have known who was courting you, but I needed to make sure everyone else knew. Especially after the other day. I thought sleeping in your bed would be enough, and I'd been scenting your work-coat a bit before I left in the mornings, but I guess some people didn't take the hint."
"They do now," Felix giggles. "Minho said I was stinky because I smelt like you."
Chan growls playfully, nipping at his lips. "Well, he's probably going to be even more upset."
"Why?"
"Because I'm about to make sure you smell like me for days," Chan coos, kissing Felix sweetly once more, fire licking in Felix's belly when the tip of Chan's tongue begins to massage his own. Felix gasps when they part, and Chan rests their foreheads together once more. "Let's go home, little one."
"Home?"
"Mhm," Chan rubs their noses together in a soft, innocent kiss. "Your cottage — let's go home."
── ⋆⋅𖤓⋅⋆ ──
The second his front door shuts behind him and they both toe off their boots, Felix is swept off of his feet.
He giggles wildly, clinging to Chan as he carries him to bed, littering kisses all over his face. Felix is laid onto his bed so gently, he would've sworn Chan was attempting to lay him on a cloud. He doesn't let go of the alpha — if anything, he clings harder, demanding that Chan join him in bed.
"I didn't pull you away from anything important, did I?" Felix checks. "I know I interrupted your meeting, and we did just leave pretty suddenly."
Chan shakes his head, climbing onto the bed between Felix's legs. "No, nothing's more important to me than you are."
"You and your words," Felix huffs an exhale through his nose. "Always so sweet."
"So you did like my letters," Chan smiles, brushing hair out of Felix's face. "I always wondered."
"I have them," Felix smiles. "I keep them somewhere safe."
"Your little keepsake box?" Chan guesses, running his thumb along Felix's cheekbone.
Felix tilts his head. "You remember that?"
"I remember everything about you," Chan confesses, bending his head to tuck his face in the crook of Felix's neck. He leaves featherlight kisses along the skin there, working his way towards his scent gland. "I can't get you out of my head."
"It's the same for me," Felix promises, clinging to him tighter. "Since the first day."
"I felt like I was going crazy," Chan says, almost like he hasn't registered Felix's own confession yet. His hands wander to Felix's torso, helping to shrug off his work coat. Once Felix is free, Chan tosses his coat to the floor, and his hands come back to rest on Felix's waist, pushing up the hem of his shirt just enough so that Chan can rest his palm on Felix's naked skin. "I wanted to be around you all the time. I know I was, at the beginning, and it made me so happy, but once you got settled in, I knew it wouldn't make sense for me to keep hovering, so I took a step back, even though it nearly killed me."
"I missed you," Felix tells him, "When I got settled, and you stepped away. I figured you were just doing your job, and once it was done, that of course you'd leave, that it wasn't realistic of me to expect you to stick around when there's hundreds of other people you need to take care of."
"If you had asked me to stay," Chan says quietly, pressing his fingertips into Felix's skin. "I would have. I never would have left your side."
"You're here now," Felix points out with a shy smile. He cups Chan's jaw in one hand, runs the other through Chan's hair. "Will you stay?"
"That's all I've ever wanted," Chan breaks eye contact, retreating down Felix's body so he can push his shirt up even more, resting his face against Felix's belly, rubbing his cheek along the skin there. "You know that."
"I do," Felix nods, his stomach tensing when Chan's curls tickle his skin. "It's still polite to ask."
"My sweet baby," Chan sighs out, lips ghosting along his skin as he speaks, "Always so considerate."
Chan's fingers curl into the waistband of Felix's pants, but they don't move past that. The alpha looks up at Felix, a question in his eyes that he can't quite seem to vocalize. Felix thinks he knows what he wants, so he simply nods, resting his hands atop Chan's.
"You can," he says, "If you want to. You can have anything."
"Anything?" Chan murmurs, looking up at Felix in awe. "That's a lot of power you're giving me."
"You're the only one I'd give it to." The honesty makes him feel a little raw, like he's cutting himself open, but he should've known Chan would never disappoint.
"I won't take it for granted," Chan promises. Felix thinks that will be it, that he'll take off Felix's pants and they'll be tangled in the sheets in seconds, but instead, he scoots himself up Felix's body. His hands glide upwards, pushing up Felix's shirt a little more.
"Can I take this off of you?" He asks, and Felix nods, lifting his arms. Chan sits up, slow as he removes the fabric, making sure his hands touch every inch of Felix's skin before the shirt soon joins Felix's work coat on the floor.
His gut instinct tells him to cover up, but when he sees the way Chan's gaze turns hungry, he lets his hands fall limply to the bed, smiling up at him as nerves make his skin prickle.
Chan shakes his head. "Don't," he pleads. "Don't be nervous — there's nothing to worry about."
Felix blinks. "How did you —"
Chan lowers himself back down to his belly, scooting down the bed until his head is hovering above Felix's sternum. "Can smell it on you," he murmurs, dropping a kiss to Felix's skin.
He wants to be embarrassed, but the feeling never comes. He still feels cut open, but he welcomes it now, wants Chan to be able to know everything he's feeling — no more hiding, no more secrets.
The alpha leaves a trail of kisses from Felix's sternum, down the center of his torso, nipping at the area around his belly button before he travels lower, his mouth hovering over his waistband. He's slow about this, too, pulling Felix's pants down little by little until the waistband of his panties are revealed. Chan bites at the fabric, lets it snap against Felix's skin before soothing the area with his tongue, dragging it along until he reaches a spot near Felix's hip.
His stomach clenches again at the ticklish sensation, breath hitching, and Chan laughs softly, tugging Felix's pants the rest of the way down. He sits up at the same time that Felix folds his legs and brings his knees to his chest, allowing Chan to tug his pants off of his feet and tosses those to the floor, too. Felix opens his legs, lets them bracket Chan's waist, and under Felix's watchful eyes, Chan strips his shirt off, exposing his expertly sculpted torso.
"Chan," Felix beckons, holding his arms out. "Come here."
Chan goes easily, folding himself into Felix's embrace. The kiss he captures Felix in is just as eager as the one they shared in Chan's office, but here and now, Felix is inundated with sandalwood, his head becoming blissfully fuzzy, his limbs loose. It almost makes him lose focus as he kisses Chan, his mouth unable to keep up with Chan's insistence, and the alpha chuckles.
"I'm sorry," he murmurs against Felix's mouth. "Was that too much?"
Felix blinks slowly, shakes his head even slower. "No," he practically pants, "Wan' it."
"Have you —" Chan pauses, searching his eyes. "Have you ever —"
Felix shakes his head. "I — with myself, I have. Not with anyone else."
Chan's face morphs into a mix of expressions at once. "Do you… should we stop?"
"No!" Felix cries, so sudden that it makes Chan flinch a little. "Sorry, no, I just — I want to. I really want to. We can so — don't stop, please."
"Okay, okay," he soothes. "I won't stop, darling, I promise." And then Chan kisses him so fiercely that it tears a gasp from Felix's throat, the noise teetering off into a whine when Chan's hand tracks down his torso, fingers brushing up against his cunt through the cotton of his panties. He moans, slick soaking the fabric in response, and his omega stirs to life, fueling his instincts.
"Smell so nice," Chan mutters between kisses, moving his fingers in slow circles, coaxing more arousal from Felix's core. "So sweet — I always knew you would be."
"Alpha," Felix pants, back arching off the bed as he pushes his hips down, trying to seek out more friction, more pressure, just more.
Felix just barely registers what he's said. He expects Chan to growl, maybe nip at Felix's skin in warning, but instead, he whines.
"Baby," he begs, fingers running over Felix's covered folds. "Please."
"Alpha," Felix croons again, driven by his omega's insistence. "Alpha."
Chan whines again, his body shivering as he presses his fingers down, rubbing over the wet fabric. Felix arches again, another plea on his lips, but it catches in his throat when Chan hooks a finger into the hem and pulls the fabric to the side, licking a fat stripe through Felix's folds, his lips closing around his clit and moaning, the rumble of it sending vibrations throughout Felix's entire frame.
"Oh," Felix exhales, his fingers descending into Chan's hair and tugging. "Yes, yeah — like that, please, Alpha."
Chan hums in response, sending a wave of pleasure licking up Felix's spine. Chan's hands come to settle on Felix's hips, his lips and tongue working in tandem to clean up the sticky mess between Felix's legs just so he can make Felix even messier. He can feel his slick practically leaking out of him, like Chan knows he's coaxing it out of him with his mouth and intends to keep going until he's had his fill.
The noises that start to echo around Felix's bedroom are so obscene that Felix would be embarrassed if he were in the right state of mind. As it is, Chan is so thoroughly devouring him that he can barely breathe — he's stuck between panting and taking in hiccuping breaths, fisting Chan's curls between his fingers so tightly that he's worried he might be hurting him.
Between the wet sounds of his own body, and Chan's whines and moans and eager noises every time so much as a drop of Felix's slick touches his tongue, Felix hopes no one decides to visit him on a whim, lest they stumble upon Felix being completely taken apart by Chan's mouth. Chan kneads at his hips, burying his face deeper into Felix's cunt, the noises they're both making increasing tenfold, and Felix keens high in his throat, thrown deeper into his pleasure when Chan's nose nudges against his clit.
Felix's legs shake from where they're draped over Chan's shoulders, and when Chan licks into his entrance, his nose rubbing up against Felix's clit as he goes, his thighs threaten to squeeze around Chan's head.
"Alpha," Felix pants, "Channie, please."
He has no idea what he's begging for, no idea what it is he wants from Chan other than more, more of his mouth, more of this feeling, more of Chan chasing after his slick like he's dying of thirst and Felix is the only thing that can satisfy his needs.
Chan brings one hand down, pulling at the gusset of Felix's panties to tug them further to the side, but he pulls too hard, and the fabric snaps against Felix's hip. Chan growls in victory, yanking the fabric out from under Felix and discarding them somewhere on the bed. Chan circles both arms under Felix's thighs, then, gripping onto his hips and yanking Felix closer, burying his entire face into Felix's cunt.
Felix cries out, thighs clamping against Chan's head. Felix is quick to say a string of apologies, but Chan doesn't seem to mind, especially if the way he's begun to fuck his tongue into Felix's hole is any indication, the sounds of his slick against Chan's mouth starting to drive him crazy.
It takes Chan no time at all to be able to fuck his tongue in and out of him, and Felix is completely devastated by it all, crying out "alpha" over and over and over again. He gets weaker the better he begins to feel, his grip in Chan's hair loosening, and his thighs begin to shake uncontrollably, his entire body vibrating under the attention of Chan's mouth.
"Alpha!" He gasps, hips bucking up against Chan's face seemingly against his will. It feels like his omega has control over his body, like she's trying to help Felix, show him what needs to be done for his alpha to give them what they want. His head thrashes against his pillow, his cheek rubbing against the embroidered sunflowers, and grateful tears begin to leak out of the corners of his eyes.
"I'm here," Chan rumbles into his folds, lapping up every bit of slick he can get to. "Just let go, little one. I've got you."
Felix nods, crying out when Chan's tongue rubs along his clit, his lips closing around the bud. It feels like his tongue is rubbing against his clit over and over, firm and taunting, and one of his arms retreats suddenly. Felix nearly cries at the slight loss of his touch, but cries out even more when he feels a finger rubbing against his entrance, his slick soaking the digit in seconds.
Chan pulls back from him long enough to tell him, "Breathe, baby. Just breathe," and then the tip of his finger is slipping inside.
Felix is no stranger to pleasing himself. He's done it countless times since moving to this village, thinking of Chan each and every time, but this is nothing like that. This is more, it's more and it's real because it's Chan between his legs, because it's Chan with his mouth on his cunt while he's trying to wiggle one of his perfect knobby fingers inside of him. Felix takes in a gasping breath as Chan pushes in a little more, twisting his hand and petting at the upper wall with the pad of his finger.
The noise that leaves Felix's mouth is close to a scream. He feels hysterical, like he can't possibly take more than this, but then Chan is burying that single finger all the way inside at the same time that he takes Felix's clit back into his mouth, and then there's no stopping the tidal wave that consumes him.
Felix's orgasm tears through his body at lightning speed, seizing all of his senses and upending his world completely. He can feel the way Chan practically purrs, the pleased rumbles coursing through his body and rattling Felix even further. His entire body is still shaking when Chan pops his head up from between his legs, and he can barely find the strength to lift his head. He's glad he's able to lift it the little bit that he can, because the sight that greets him is one he doesn't think he'll ever forget.
Chan's face is soaked — Felix's slick is all over his nose, his mouth, his chin, smeared along his cheeks — and his pupils are blown out so wide that his brown eyes are practically black, and he's looking at Felix like he's never been hungrier in his life, and Felix is his favorite meal.
He exhales harshly, laughing as he tips his head back against his pillow. He's staring wide eyed at his ceiling when he says, "I think you killed me."
Felix can feel Chan's smirk against his thigh when he leaves little soothing kisses there, licking at the mess that's spread along the skin. "You can't die yet," Chan teases. "I've only gotten one finger in you, so far."
A pleasant buzz of fear runs down Felix's spine. "So far?"
"Mhm," Chan bends his head, pressing a kiss to Felix's pubic bone, nuzzling his face into the neatly groomed hairs there. "So far. Still gotta get my cock in you, too. And my knot."
Knot.
Felix's head swims — he's grateful he's already laying down, because the vertigo that runs through him at the reminder that he's going to have Chan's knot inside him would have certainly brought him to his knees.
"Knot," Felix echoes dreamily.
"Yeah, baby." Chan begins moving his finger once more. "I'm gonna give you a nice, fat knot — fill you up and keep you on my lap. Does that sound good?"
Felix's words don't make it out of his mouth, so he nods, taking gasping breaths once Chan crooks his finger, petting along the spongy muscle in Felix's cunt that makes his eyes roll into the back of his head.
"Relax for me," Chan coaxes, and Felix can feel the tip of a second finger poking at his entrance. Another orgasm hits him so suddenly he can barely breathe, and he's thoroughly shaking by the time Chan is knuckle deep with both fingers, just keeping them seated deep inside of Felix's body.
By the time Chan's got a third, and then a fourth finger inside of him, Felix can't feel his limbs. His throat is raw with the way Chan's name has clawed its way out of his throat over and over, and he's pretty sure he'll need to completely dismantle his nest, change his bed linens, and dry out his mattress once they're done.
If they ever actually get done. It feels like Chan is content to wring out as many orgasms as he can out of Felix before he's even knotted him, like he's purposefully prolonging Felix's pleasure, morphing it into slow burning torture.
When Felix comes so hard he feels like his lungs are going to give out, he weakly pushes at Chan's head, trying and failing to lift his legs to try to rip his cunt away from Chan's face and incredibly talented fingers.
"Please," he all but squeals. "I can't."
"You can," Chan murmurs, but carefully withdraws his fingers, pressing soothing kisses along the inside of his thighs when each knuckle seems to send aftershocks rolling through his body. Felix has to force himself to look away once Chan gets his fingers out and immediately brings them to his lips. The sucking that he hears makes his cunt throb pathetically, more slick leaking out of him and onto the bed.
He takes a deep breath, trying to pull in as much air as he can, but all he ends up inhaling is the thick, cloying taste of sandalwood and vanilla mixed together so thoroughly he almost chokes on it, his eyes falling shut at the sensation. He hears as Chan sits up, hears as he strips himself of the rest of his clothes and tosses them to the floor along with Felix's.
And then, he smells him — Chan's arousal is stronger now, sandalwood completely encompassing his senses. His omega nearly barks, and she wiggles restlessly, trying to get Felix to turn over onto his belly, spread his knees wide apart and present for their alpha. He barely has the strength to fight her off, remaining exactly where he is. If Chan wants him to present, he's going to have to move Felix himself, because he can't move.
The bed dips a little as Chan walks himself closer to Felix on his knees, nudging his legs even further apart before he pulls at Felix's hips, sliding his thighs over Chan's own, tucking his hands into the crook of Felix's knees and pushing them up, up, up, until Felix's thighs are flush with his chest.
"Oh," Chan gasps a little, a small giggle bubbling past his lips. "Flexible baby."
"Mmm," is all Felix can say. He lets Chan guide his hands to the back of his thighs so he can hold himself open. It takes far more brain power than he'd like to admit to remind himself to stay just like this.
"Aw, my little sunflower," Chan coos, settling back on his haunches. "It's alright. You just lay right there, Alpha will take care of you now."
Alpha. A pleasant shiver courses through him, turning into a full bodied shiver when Felix feels something warm and firm press against his entrance.
Cock.
His eyes fly open, and he pulls all of his strength into lifting his head and looking at where Chan is rubbing the head of his cock through Felix's folds. He can't help it — he gasps, half in awe, half in fear, and Chan looks up at the sound, smirking at Felix's expression. He leans forward, propping himself up above Felix with one hand while the other continues to rub himself against Felix.
"Don't worry," Chan murmurs, voice soothing. He notches himself against Felix's entrance once more, pushing inside just the slightest bit when he says, "I'll make it so good for you."
Felix comes.
He nearly lets go of his legs, but Chan's hands come to cover his own, keeping his legs pressed against his torso. Chan gasps, nearly growling as he tries to restrain himself from fucking all the way into him.
Tries.
Chan pushes himself further on instinct, fighting past the tight grip of Felix's cunt, shoving his cock in deeper, and Felix screams, another orgasm careening through his body too fast for him to do anything about.
"Fuck!" Chan's hands shake atop Felix's.
Felix can hear his own pulse thundering in his ears. It's all so much, it's too much, but as much as his body is ready to give out, he can't.
Knot.
Knot.
Knot.
He needs it.
"Please," he begs weakly. He forces his eyes open, gaze locking with Chan's instantly. "Please," he repeats.
"Felix —"
"Chan," he lowers his voice into something desperate. "Alpha."
Chan snarls and punches his hips forward, burying the rest of his cock inside of Felix in one go.
Tears stream freely from his eyes — he feels so full — it's so much more than he ever anticipated. His cunt throbs in protest, too sensitive, the threat of overstimulation creeping at the edges of his body. He lets Chan fuck him anyway, completely handing his pleasure into the hands of his Alpha.
His Alpha.
Chan is his.
He might not have his teeth in his neck, but Felix has him all the same, and he has Felix in turn, and that's enough.
All Felix can do is hold his legs up and apart, keeping himself open for Chan's pleasure, lets his Alpha fuck him and ravage his body until Chan's growls threaten to rattle through his entire cottage, the structural integrity completely questionable with the way Chan has Felix's bed-frame shaking, scraping against the floor, the wood creaking like it'll snap under the force of Chan's love at any second.
Because this is love. Felix can feel it — he can feel how badly Chan wants him, can feel how much Chan loves him, how his knot has already formed but seems to get bigger, thicker from where it's knocking against Felix's cunt. He's had his love in physical gifts, in words written in black in white, in his quiet care, but this? The fierceness of his affection, the devotion to Felix's pleasure, the single-minded focus he has to give Felix a knot?
It's everything.
As another orgasm wracks through his body, Felix knows in the way Chan's body shakes in turn that it will be Felix's last for some time. Chan's scent is getting stronger, almost burning Felix's lungs with how intense it's becoming, licking at the flames of their arousal and dousing Felix in the reality of what's to come.
Chan's grip tightens on Felix's legs as his hips bear down, knot popping past the tight entrance of Felix's cunt, locking them together as Chan comes with a growl that sounds close to being feral.
Chan releases Felix's legs so quickly, wrapping them around his waist as he all but collapses on top of him. Felix squirms as Chan's muscular torso brushes against his swollen clit, a smaller yet still thunderous orgasm coursing through him once more. This time, Chan snarls in warning — he's mistaken Felix's overstimulation for a fight to get away, and his jaw opens wide, teeth pressing in just so at the skin of Felix's scent gland at the same time his hand comes up behind Felix, two fingers pressing down firmly at the nape of his neck.
Bliss.
Felix goes limp under the haze of the scruff, his mouth parted in a gasp. Chan purrs happily, jaw still open wide, and Felix doesn't even move when he eventually flips them so he rests on Chan's torso instead.
If Chan wanted it, Felix would let himself be consumed all over again.
── ⋆⋅𖤓⋅⋆ ──
It takes awhile for Chan's knot to go down, and Felix dozes on his chest as they wait it out. When he comes to, he's laying on the bed, his upper half nearly on Chan's lap, arms around Chan's trim waist as he sits up with his back against the headboard. He's staring out of Felix's open bedroom window, fingers rubbing soothing circles into Felix's arm.
"Channie," Felix croaks.
Chan flinches into action, reaching over to Felix's nightstand and grabbing a glass of water. He helps Felix sit up before bringing the cup to Felix's lips, helping him to drink until he's gotten his fill. Chan sets the glass back down quickly, turning his body and letting Felix fall into his embrace, simpering happily.
"How are you feeling?" Chan asks quietly.
"Mmm," Felix takes stock of his body and feels nothing but pleasant aches. "Good. Really good."
Chan chuckles. "That's good, little one. I'm glad."
"Me too," Felix murmurs into Chan's chest. "I'm really glad you decided to court me, by the way."
A pleased rumble courses through Chan's body. "I'm glad you decided to accept, and that you want to court me back."
"Oh!" Felix exclaims once Chan's words register, pushing himself off of Chan and shoving the blankets off of his body. "I almost forgot!"
He untangles his limbs from Chan's, trying to get off the bed, but his legs wobble precariously.
"Oh," Chan laughs. "Need some help, baby?"
Felix flushes, embarrassed. "No," He scoots to the edge of the bed on his butt and sets his feet on the ground. He pauses, trying to focus past the ache in his limbs enough to find the strength to stand.
He can hear the smirk on Chan’s lips when he says, "I’d be happy to carry you to wherever it is you’d like to go, little one."
"I can do it," Felix insists, standing on his shaky legs. He takes small steps, ignoring the way his muscles protest as he slowly approaches Chan’s side of the bed, finding his work-coat on the floor where Chan had left it. He digs around in the front pocket, wrapping his fingers around the necklace and pulling it out. It takes him a second to untangle the chain, and he quickly closes his fist around it as he turns back toward the alpha, continuing his slow steps.
When he’s close enough, Chan reaches out with both hands, and Felix reaches out, too, goes limp as Chan lifts Felix off of the floor and places him in his lap. Chan settles his hands on Felix's hips once he’s steady, accepting the delicate and appreciative kiss Felix plants on his lips.
"What've you got there, little one?" Chan asks, gesturing with his chin to Felix's hand.
"It's your first courting gift," Felix admits, a little shy. "It's not a sunflower, but…it's mine."
He uncurls his fist, lifting the necklace by the chain until a little silver heart pendant is revealed. Chan gasps softly.
"In my village," Felix explains, "Our parents have a necklace made for us when we're born in the shape of a heart. The sizes are different, along with the design, and the color of the metal, but they're always a heart. We don't have a formal courting season, but if and when we start to court who we wish to be with, one of the first gifts we give to each other — especially if we're serious, and we wish to mate with them — is our birth necklace. The heart resembles everything we were, everything we are, and everything we can be so long as we have those that we love by our sides. By giving it to our chosen mate, we're essentially saying that we want everything with them, too."
Felix undoes the clasp carefully, "When I realized that I wanted to court you, and that I didn't want to be with anyone else, I knew I needed to give this to you as your first gift, on the off chance that you did accept me."
Chan squeezes Felix's hips, pulling him closer. "Of course I would accept you, Lix. There's no way that I wouldn't. And I accept this, too. I'd be honored to accept your necklace, your courting — anything and everything you're willing to give me."
A shy smile creeps its way onto Felix's lips, and he has to look away to focus on the necklace as he secures it around Chan's neck so that he doesn't expose his feelings.
It's useless, of course — Chan smells the burst of vanilla almost immediately, and he leans forward once the necklace is secured, kissing Felix eagerly. Felix sighs happily, wrapping his limbs around Chan as he's lowered back to the bed, cushioned among the blankets.
"I love you," Chan murmurs against his lips, notching the head of his cock into Felix, slipping inside of him slowly. "My beautiful sunflower."
"I love you," Felix sighs, shivering when Chan's buried deep inside, tilting his head to the side to give his alpha his acceptance.
Chan presses a soft kiss to his scent gland, a happy rumble vibrating in his chest. "Soon," he promises Felix.
Felix can't wait.
── ⋆⋅𖤓⋅⋆ ──
"Absolutely not!" Minho cries, waving the spatula in his hand threateningly as he backs Felix out of the front door, nearly making Chan topple over from where he is behind him.
"Minho," Chan chastises. "Enough, let us in."
"No way," Minho laughs, pointing at Felix. "He stinks."
"I just bathed!" Felix exclaims. "How can I possibly stink?"
"Because, your stupid alpha has made you smell like him! I can't smell you at all — all I can smell is his stinky pheromones!"
"I do not stink!" Felix cries, fighting the urge to growl and snap at his friends. "And don't call Chan stinky! He smells perfectly fine."
"Oh god," Jisung groans, emerging from within the house to join Minho in the doorway. "He's brainwashed our poor, innocent Lixie!"
"You guys are ridiculous," Chan grumbles. "You said you wanted us to join you for dinner. Now either let us in, or I'll —"
"Alright!" Minho sighs, "Don't even finish your perverted threat. Come inside — Jagi, open the windows. We'll need to air the place out."
"One step ahead of you," Jisung mutters under his breath.
Felix is still a little peeved, but Chan eases his mood with a gentle kiss to his temple.
It's been close to two weeks since he and Chan have been courting, and Minho wanted to hold a congratulatory dinner for them at the farm with all of their friends in attendance. Chan and Felix follow them out to the sunroom at the back of their home, where all of their friends are crowded around the biggest dining table Felix has ever seen.
He and Chan greet them all with smiles and hugs, and Felix accepts their congratulations with shy thank yous and a permanent blush on his cheeks.
"I can't believe you made us all keep your secret," Wooyoung chides Chan, "I'm glad it was only for five days, though."
"For you it was five days," Changbin scoffs. "For some of us, we've been keeping it a secret since Felix got here."
"Yeah," Hyunjin admits. "I didn't think I had it in me to keep it from Felix much longer."
"It's fine," Seungmin shakes his head, "Jisung was the one who basically blabbed."
"Felix needed help," Jisung insists, "And I didn't tell him everything!"
"You told him enough," Chan snorts, taking a sip of his mead. "Didn't even let me get to day fifteen."
"What's day fifteen?" Felix looks at Chan with a small pout.
Hongjoong smirks. "Nothing, he just had something special planned."
"We can still do it," Felix insists. "Even though we're way past day fifteen now."
"We already did it," Chan tells him quietly. "On day five. We've been doing it nearly every day since day five."
"Oh?" Felix thinks back, thinks of what happened on the fifth day as he takes in the look on Chan's face, how his eyes go dark, the way his scent slowly seeps out, and — "Oh."
Changbin scoffs. "Yeah. Oh."
"Sorry," Felix says sheepishly, trying to stifle his scent and rid himself of the flush in his cheeks.
Minho smiles. "You tried your best, Chan-ah."
"Well," Seonghwa smiles, leaning forward. "Now that Felix knows, it'll be so much easier to prepare for The Chase, don't you think?"
A small, embarrassed silence seems to fall upon the table. Felix turns to look at his friends, and then to Chan. When they all seem to be red in the face and avoiding his eyes, he straightens up in his seat.
"What's 'The Chase' supposed to be?" He asks.
Yeosang smiles knowingly. "How did courting season in your home village usually end? Did the couples get married, or…?"
Felix nods. "They usually did, yes. But they were private ceremonies, usually family and close friends only."
"My heart," Chan murmurs, taking his hand. "Things are… a little different here."
Felix wants to scoff and roll his eyes — he clearly knows that by now. Instead, he simply asks, "How different?"
"Well, that depends," Minho sighs, leaning back in his chair with a smirk. "Tell me Felix, how do you feel about muzzles?"