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"Sure you wanna go out?" Daryl asked as you were loading up the car with a few supplies for the road.
"I already told you, I'm fine," you replied.
The last time he had gone out on the road, Denise had been shot right through the head with an arrow. It fucked with Daryl's head more than he would ever care to admit, but at night when he would come to bed, he would lay there and toss and turn.
Last night had been no different for him, you knew it was another sleepless night, especially knowing you had volunteered to go out with him.
They hadn't been prepared for how much medicine would be left at the apothecary and didn't have the means to bring it all back, so the two of you were headed back that way to collect the rest.
You hadn't been dating long, but you knew him well enough to know that he hated the idea of you going out into the world, especially when you didn't have to. There were plenty of other able-bodied people who could make the short trip with him, but you missed him.
Was missing him enough of a reason to put your life on the line?
You thought it was.
The drive was quiet, but comfortable. Daryl was hardly a man of many words, so you relished in the peace and quiet he gave you. It was never awkward or weird, it was comforting.
"Hate you bein' here ya know," he mumbled after a few more minutes of not speaking.
"I know."
"Then why'd ya volunteer?"
"I don't know..." you trailed off.
His blue eyes met yours across the car. He'd hate you thinking it, but they were so soft. Underneath all of the grit and toughness he protruded, his eyes were pillowy and you could get lost in a trance if he'd let you look long enough.
He never did.
"I think ya do know and ya just don't wanna say."
"I wanted to spend time with you is all," you replied, looking out the window. It was silly. You could spend time with him when he got back tonight or hell, any other night he didn't have shit to do. But he was always needed somewhere or needed to do something because a man like him was built for a world like this and you just missed his touch.
He didn't say anything, he just reached a hand over and held onto yours, sitting it on your lap. Deep down, you knew he thought you were being ridiculous, but he went along with it anyways because he loved you.
The rest of the drive to the shop was silent, minus the in and outs of your breaths and the movement here and there of his skin trailing across your worn jeans.
He killed the engine outside the small store before stepping out into the beating sun. He handed you a small pistol to keep in your pocket as you scoped the outside for walkers. But he never strayed too far from you, always keeping himself one step ahead and looking back every few seconds to make sure behind you was cleared too.
Daryl was protective like that, though that is something else he would never admit to. You had made it on your own for a while before joining Rick's group, but he never seemed to care. He would put himself between you and a dozen walkers on his own if it meant you would be okay.
He swung open the door to the apothecary and guided you inside, gun held out and ready to shoot at anyone or anything, but it seemed to have stayed empty since the last time he had been there. You filled up your backpacks and made multiple trips out to the car to fill it up with medications and herbs they had to leave behind before.
There were a couple of boxes left to bring out, but Daryl told you to go wait out in the car. He was a nervous wreck having you out here and if sitting in the car made him feel better, you would do so.
As you sat there, toying at the hem of your shirt to make yourself busy, a store out of the corner of your eye caught your attention. It was a small convenience store, most likely ransacked already, but you were there, so what was the harm in checking?
"We should check that one out," you said to Daryl while he was finishing up sorting the boxes he had carried out. "See what's left."
He glanced up to see what it was were talking about, but he shook his head. "Not worth it," he muttered. "That shit's cleared out by now."
"We could always just check. Maybe it's our lucky day?"
"Nah. Leave it," he grumbled.
But you were more stubborn than he was. Your door was open before your mind could catch up as Daryl had gone back inside for the last box and wasn't there to stop you. Quickly, you ran across the hot pavement and made your way into the store.
Your instincts took over as you swept the inside for the undead. But unfortunately, Daryl had been right. There was nothing left there. You had scanned every countertop and shelf for anything to make this endeavor even seem remotely worth it, but there was nothing.
As you were getting ready to walk back out back to the car, you saw a can of beans sitting all by its lonesome on a shelf behind the register. You jumped the counter and made your way back when you smelled it. You always smelled them first. The scent of rotting flesh haunted your dreams at night, you could never forget the awful aroma. And then you heard it. Multiple "its" actually. The gurgling was all too familiar.
You needed to hurry and get out of there, but you were hell bent on that stupid can of beans. You reached an arm out when you felt it. The barely-hanging-on skin of the walker's boney hand latching onto your forearm. It groaned right in your face, putrid breath filling your lungs. Between the smell and the fear, you nearly lost your lunch on the tile floor.
You leaned your free hand back to grab the gun out of your back pocket, but it clattered to the floor and slid under a shelf.
"Shit!" You muttered to yourself. Two more walkers dragged themselves into the room from the stockroom, both in tattered gas station uniforms ripped at the chest.
You were fighting relentlessly at the one with the hold on your arm, pushing back its gnawing face trying to clamp down on any skin it could get to. You pushed and pushed, only pulling at bloodied flesh tearing away like wet paper and sticking to your fingers.
Closer and closer, the other two made their way towards you, their moans getting louder, scent getting stronger.
This was it. Daryl had told you not to and you did it anyways and now this was it. He would find you, either dead and eaten away at or walking towards him as a walker. Either way you knew this was it and you were about to break his heart.
You fell to the floor with a crash, shelves falling over and hitting the tile hard. Your heart was pounding out of your chest, urging the walker on like it could hear the beating and needed to stop it with its teeth. You couldn't breathe. You couldn't think. There was nothing around you to grab onto to bash its head in.
You screamed. Already imagining the feeling of teeth tearing you apart. You screamed as loud as you could.
Bang.
Bang.
Bang.
The walkers dropped "dead" to the floor with hollowed thuds, rusty blood splattering the walls and floor.
The only thing you could do was let your chest heave up and down, a loud reminder that you had made it, you were still here. The noise of your breathing calmed the nerves that had bottled up in your belly when you heard the breaths of someone else — familiar breaths.
"Thought I told you to stay in the damn car..." he mumbled before jumping the counter.
"I—" but words failed you. You could barely muster up a sound let alone a sentence. You couldn't even get yourself up the dirty floor, littered with dust, trash, and debris. But he met you there, kneeling beside you.
"Hey, s'alright," he whispered before gathering you up in his arms. He carried the warmth of the outside on his clothes, like he was the sun underneath the material. "You hurt?"
You shook your head. Besides the sore bottom from falling, you were alright. But then the tears found you. Hot, wet tears formed in your eyes, welling on the surface before falling in long lines down your cheeks.
"Shh, baby, s'alright. You're okay," he soothed, rubbing your back in slow circles. His hands vibrated against your skin through your flannel. You knew what had just happened scared the daylights out of him, maybe even more so than it did you.
"I— I just thought that..."
"Told ya it wasn't worth it. Nothin' but a damn can of beans," he said while eyeing the can you still hadn't let go of.
"I didn't want to come back empty handed."
"Ya almost didn't come back at all..."
The car ride back was somehow even more silent than the drive there, this time it was heavy with tension. Even though he had calmed you down, he was angry at you for not following what he had said, putting yourself at risk. If he hadn't shown up...
You couldn't think like that though because he had shown up, he saved you.
The trees passed by as he drove the two of you back to Alexandria, letting his anger stew.
When you rolled through the gates, he shut off the car and slammed the door shut after he got out.
Shit.
"She's done going on runs," he said angrily to Rick. "She's done."
"What happened?" He asked, confusion spreading across his face.
"Don't ask." And he was gone. He was going wherever it was when he needed to cool off, to not let anyone inside his head to see what he was really feeling.
Night had fallen over Virginia and Daryl still hadn't come back to the house. Your stomach rumbled and you decided that if he wanted to be stubborn, you would just have to eat without him. Though no one really had "meals" lately. Not proper ones anyhow.
You swung open the cabinet with a creak and your eyes met the can of beans you had grabbed earlier, had risked your life for. It seemed meaningless now, all that for a lousy can of beans. You hardly even liked beans, they were mushy and tasteless most of the time. The silver can was staring daggers into your heart, reminding you of the near-fatal attack you had encountered earlier.
You took that stupid can of beans and tore open the lid, staring down at the small morsels floating around on the top. You gritted your teeth as you took a warped spoon and scooped a shaky hand into the container, pulling out a small spoonful. Your stomach was so empty it ached, but for some reason you just couldn't get your hand to move the spoon closer to your mouth. It had stayed put, levitating over the top of the can, juice dripping down.
Drip.
Your mind was back in store, hearing the growls so close it shook your eardrums.
Drip.
The smell of rotten flesh filled your senses again, filling your stomach with a queasy feeling. It burned every nose hair you had and filled your lungs like smoke.
Drip.
You felt the tearing of flesh, leaving behind a slick residue on your fingertips. The way it had torn so easily it had looked fake, but you could still feel it. You could feel it all, like it was happening in that moment instead of hours prior.
And then the bangs.
The ringing in your ears.
The way the blood had dripped across your shoes that you stared at the entire drive home, how it was almost your blood, your flesh.
You dumped the whole can of beans into the trash, deciding to go to bed hungry. It wouldn't be the first time and it definitely wouldn't be the last, but you couldn't stomach it.
You laid in the bed, the one you normally shared with Daryl, and stared out the window. The full moon was in perfect view. Where was he? Did he like to look at the moon too? Was he looking at it at the very same moment you were?
Sleep found you eventually, though it took a while. It was hard to sleep when a whole person was missing next to you, when a whole person should be enveloping you with their arms and scent.
When you did wake, it was to Daryl rustling through the doorway and crawling under the covers, slipping in right next to you under the sheets.
Anger then found you.
How could he act like nothing had happened when so much had?
You nearly died and all he could muster up when you returned was telling Rick you weren't allowed on runs anymore, as if he had the right to take that away from you. Then he left to who knows where and thinks he can just get into your bed like it was nothing.
He draped his arm over your body and you inched away. "Seriously?" He grumbled, to which you didn't reply. "What's your problem?"
"My problem? Are you really asking me that right now?" You sat up quickly against the headboard and looked at him, but fuck, you hated being mad at him. His steel blue eyes were illuminated by the moon and the urge to kiss him was nearly impossible to resist. "First you tell me to stay in the car, like you can boss me around. And then you tell Rick I can't go on runs anymore. Who are you to tell me what I can and can't do?"
He rolled his eyes then and huffed. "Ya wanna go on runs so bad? Fine. But ya ain't goin' with me no more. Can't stand to see ya get yourself killed over a fuckin' can of beans. Saw em' in the trash too. Wasted."
"Ugh!" You whined. "You're so frustrating! One minute you care and the next you don't. You're so confusing!"
"Ya think I don't care?" He said, voicing slightly raised. "That's the fuckin' problem is that I care."
"That's a problem? Caring about me is a problem now?"
"Ya know that ain't what I meant..." he trailed off.
"Well it sure as hell seems like it. Bossing me around like you own me. And then just leaving! I was scared and you left me!" Tears started to form in your eyes and you hid your face in your hands, trying to keep him from seeing, but it was no avail.
"Baby..." he whispered, lightly pulling your hands away from your face. "M'sorry." He leaned forward to press gentle kisses to each tear that fell, wiping them away from your cheeks with his soft lips. "I ain't mean to hurt ya. I love you. Ya scared me s'all."
"So you get to just leave because you're scared?" You asked, your lip quivering.
He sighed. He knew you were right and there was no way around it. He left when he shouldn't have and he couldn't take that back, no matter how badly he might want to. "M'sorry ya know. For all of it. S'my fault."
Looking up at him, his stormy eyes were filling like rain clouds, ready to release themselves over his cheeks. "Daryl... it's—" you sighed, "it's not your fault. You're right. I was being stubborn and careless and put myself into a situation you shouldn't have had to fix. And I love you, but you don't get to just leave because you're upset with me. I needed you tonight."
Your last words cut through him like knives.
I needed you.
And he hadn't been there.
One by one, tears fell down his cheeks and now you were crying together, sitting in your bed. You pressed your forehead against his and listened to his breathing. "M'sorry."
"I know."
"Can't lose you baby, not you. Anyone but you." His words were quiet, but they hit you right in the stomach, sending it lurching forward. Your hand found its way into his long hair, sticky with sweat from the heat of the day, but your fingertips dug down onto his scalp to rub right at the roots.
You closed your eyes as you felt his warm, calloused hand find its way to your cheek, brushing away any left over tears with his rough thumb. "I'm sorry I scared you. I scared me too. I thought I was gonna d—"
"Shh,' he said. He couldn't bear to hear the word that was about to leave your mouth. Not when he saw it so close to happening. The momet had been replaying in his mind over and over since he saw it happen.
The two of you sat there quietly for a few moments, foreheads pressed against each other, hands tangled, breathing the same air.
The moment shifted — the fear and the tension. Neither disappeared, but rather they changed shape.
Daryl's hand slid from your cheek down to your neck, his thumb dragging across your skin. "You're here."
"I'm here," you whispered back, nodding your head. The movement made your nose tickle against his, making the air around you warmer.
Within seconds, his lips were on yours, capturing them fully in an all-consuming kiss. He was gentle for a few seconds at first, but he was hungry for you. His lips moved passionately against you, like if he stopped for even a moment, the two of you would end up back in the convenience store and he would be a second too late.
Slowly, your other hand made its way into his hair, tangling your fingers through every brown strand. Your body moved closer to his like a magnet, inching closer and closer.
"Need ya," he grumbled against your lips, still not daring to pull away.
That was all you needed to hear to pull yourself completely to his lap, crash landing onto his jeans he hadn't bother changing out of. The bed caught your knees gracefully, holding you up like clouds that were you floating on.
His lips eventually did pull away, but only to trail down your jawline, paying close attention to the sweet spot below your ear.
"Daryl," you breathed out, egging him on. His mouth sucked delicately around the sensitive spot, building up the heat in your core. His erection was growing by the second, pressing hard against his pants, and begging to be freed.
Two can play at this teasing game. While Daryl was busy attacking your throat, leaving behind small hickeys, you started to grind yourself against his clothed cock.
The vibration of his groans against your neck sent shivers down your spine as the cool air hit the wetness he left behind.
His lips only dragged down further, making their way to your chest, exposed by the tank-top you were wearing. His tongue swiped across your bare skin, soaking in your taste. His hands had also found a spot on your hips and your plan to tease had backfired as he was thoroughly enjoying the feeling of you dry humping him. His hands were now guiding you back and forth across his lap.
"Take this off, baby," he said, tugging on the hem of your shirt. You reached down to pull it off in one swoop, leaving your chest completely exposed in front of him. The coolness of the night crept in through the windows and bit at your sensitive nubs, making them already halfway perky.
His tongue slid down, leaving a wet path behind, to your left nipple. His stubble tickled against your surrounding breast as his tongue swirled across your bud, completely hardening it in his warm mouth.
He left it bare to give your right breast attention, but between the coolness in the air and the wetness he left behind, the sensation was almost too much to bear. You lulled your head back and he caught your spine with one of his hands, the other snaked its way around your hips to hold you in place so he could give your other nipple the proper attention.
When he was satisfied with the hardness, he grazed his teeth across it sending another grueling sensation to your aching core. You were soaked through your shorts already and you were only halfway undressed.
"So needy," he mumbled, but you didn't care how needy you seemed. You were needy.
By this point, Daryl was completely hard beneath you as you continued grinding on him. You two had decided the same thing in your minds at the same time: there were too many clothes in the way.
He gently laid you down and your head landed softly on the pillows. Your shorts were the next item of clothing to go. The slickness from your heat slid down your thighs. His eyes never left yours as he positioned himself between your legs, looking up at you as he pressed an agonizingly slow kiss to your still clothed pussy.
Another kiss.
And another.
Still his eyes were focused on you. And then finally you felt your panties being pulled down your legs, exposing where you really wanted him at.
Daryl spread your legs apart, giving him the perfect view of every fold and the arousal dripping out of you. He dragged his tongue up once.
"Please," you begged.
His tongue dragged up another time before fully enveloping you. He watched you with careful eyes as you writhed beneath him. He watched for every jolt and listened for every sigh. He was a starving man and you were serving him a full course meal.
His tongue lapped up all of your juices as dove into every fold and ending on your clit. He sucked softly at first, easing you into it. But he started to gain momentum, sucking your clit fully into his mouth and releasing with a quiet pop. His tongue laid flat against you, covering every bit of you.
"Shit," you moaned.
Your hands had never left his head, holding him close against you, as if he would go anywhere else. And then you felt two fingers insert into your hole, stretching you out slightly. He pumped them in and out of you over and over again as his tongue rolled around your clit. You felt your release building up in your core, winding up tighter and tighter every time he hit your spot inside.
He knew you were close by the way you started to tug at his roots and wiggled around, begging for more stimulation. And then he started to hum. The humming sent small vibrations through your core not even your own fingers could have figured out. Your back arched instinctively, raising your body above the bed.
"Daryl," you breathed out. "Fuck."
You exploded. Your orgasm had wound up so tightly, you shook upon release as he continued lapping up more and more of you, letting you ride out your full high against his face.
He only pulled away once your body sank in relaxation. His face was glistening and he licked his lips, savoring everything you gave him. Your hand was still wrapped up in his locks, so you gently tugged him up to your face, tasting your own sweetness on lis lips.
It made your core ache again, but in the way only his cock could satisfy.
Through your kiss, you pulled at the button of his jeans, trying to undo them, but you struggled. Huffing a laugh, but not breaking the kiss, he brought his fingers down, trailing over yours, and unbuttoned his own jeans. You felt wildly satisfied as you heard the undoing of his zipper and felt him shimmy out of his pants.
"These next," you whispered, yanking at his plaid boxers.
He did as you said and pulled those down, his cock springing free.
"Been thinkin' 'bout this all day," he said while lining himself up with your entrance.
Gently, he eased himself into you, hovering over top of you and looking down into your eyes. Inch by inch, he pushed himself in, stretching you out in only the way he could. Butterflies filled your belly as you felt his hips pressed against you.
He eased himself out of you and pushed himself back in, over and over slowly until you were relaxed. And then he picked up speed. Every thrust, he came back harder, hitting your spot each time. Your legs wrapped around his waist and your arms were around his neck.
It was needy, desperate sex, I-almost-saw-you-die sex. Each thrust made the pain of the day lessen. He was fucking the fear right out of you, reminding you that he was there, always. Reminding you that you were there too.
His forehead found its way to yours again, pressing softly as you felt him rock back and forth. You were back to sharing the same small space of air, sucking frantically in what he was heaving out. He was inside of you and it still wasn't close enough.
You had him pull out of you long enough to slip onto your side and pull him behind you, slipping his cock back inside of you. Every part of him was covering your backside now, holding you close in his arms.
At this angle, he could reach around and rub circles on your clit. You reached behind you to hold him even closer to you. He was pushing inside of you deeper than ever. Every vein he had was prominent against your insides, memorizing every streak.
His thrusts started to become erratic, which partially disappointed you, only because you weren't ready for this moment with him to end — the closeness of it all.
Between Daryl hitting your spot over and over again and his rough fingers toying with your clit, you were racing towards another orgasm too. It was building up in your belly when you felt his warmth splatter the inside of your walls. The sensation was enough to tip you overboard and land in euphoria. You were seeing stars as you released on him, soaking up his ejaculation.
But still, you weren't ready for him to leave you feeling bare. He started to pull himself out when you stopped him, redness creeping onto your cheeks. "W-what if you just...stayed like that?" You asked, embarrassed, but hoping he would feel the same way. You needed him as close as you could get him, at least for tonight.
He eased himself back inside of you and pressed a kiss to your temple and then another to your shoulder. "Night baby. I love you." Was all he said. No ridicule or asking why, just understanding in the way he always did with you.
His bare chest was pressed up against your back as he laid an arm around you, pulling you in tighter against him. He didn't want this moment with you to end either, scared you might slip away. "I love you too."
His heart beat was pounding against your back, lulling you to sleep with its gentle melody.