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scraps for the dog

Summary:

Party Poison gives themself a bad haircut, and Fun Ghoul tries to help. Kind of.

Notes:

I’m in the middle of writing a pretty heavy and long Frerard fic so I needed a Funpoison porn break from the yearn and despair. This is technically a part two to the last Funpoison fic I posted, although unrelated I loved writing these characterizations of them so I wanted to give them a second round. Thank you to angelswith3nemies for the beta and callmeasweetheart for the moral support. Title is from a Missing Link song.

Work Text:

Party Poison looked in the grimy bathroom mirror with disdain, hands tugging at their bright red hair. The haircut they had just given themself was less than ideal; initially they had been trying for something close to a mohawk, but had ended up taking too much off the top, so in a last-ditch effort to balance it out, they had taken the rusty scissors at an angle to the front as well, trying to add some choppy layers. What they had ended up with was a hacked up mess, still too long in some areas, and lopsided from front to back. They groaned, tossing the scissors into the sink atop chopped off tufts of fiery hair. 

There was a knock at the door.

“Wha’s takin’ ya so long, Pois?” Fun Ghoul’s voice came through, muffled and annoyed. “Ya fuckin’ fall in? I gotta piss.”

“Fuck off, Ghoul,” Poison retorted, pushing their hair back again with their hand. They took a ratty comb from the side of the sink and began to attempt to backcomb it into shape, teasing it upwards. More stray cut hairs were falling all around them as they combed. They huffed. “Fuck.”

“Ya need help?” Ghoul asked. He sounded earnest. Poison growled under their breath. 

“No,” they barked. “Go piss outside if ya gotta go. ‘M busy.”

“Jet said he’ll kill me if he catches me pissin’ behind the garage again,” Ghoul whined. “‘N he’s out there workin’ on the car anyway.”

Poison teased their hair faster, combing some longer strands down over their eyes. They threw the comb into the sink, clattering against the discarded scissors. “Sounds like a personal problem. Fuck. Off.”

They stared into the mirror. Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad if they just shaved their head and started over, they thought. Maybe they could make it into a trend. Everyone in the Zones was always copying what they did, anyway. 

They picked up the scissors again. Shuffling noises came from the other side of the door. 

“Ya jerkin’ off?”

“Destroya,” Poison cursed, slamming their hands down onto the edge of the sink, the handle of the scissors pressing painfully into the muscle of their thumb. “If ya don’t fuck off outta here in two seconds I’mma have you packed up and delivered to Bli with a fuckin’ bow on the box. I said fuck off.”

Ghoul was silent for a moment, as if he were weighing his options. “So ya don’t need any help?”

Poison stared into the mirror again. Their face was as bright red as their mutilated hair. They pictured opening the door and stabbing Ghoul with the scissors, but that wouldn’t do any good for anybody. They’d have to listen to Ghoul complain, and then they’d have to sit through a lecture from Jet about - what was it called, again? - tet-something, Tetris? They couldn’t remember. And then Kobra would make a joke about star-crossed lovers, and they would have to spend the rest of the week making it up to the whole crew by being nice, which sounded exhausting. 

Instead, they turned on their heel and opened the door.

“What do ya- oh,” Ghoul stuttered out. His hazel eyes were wide, going straight to the top of their head, with his eyebrows raised. “Ya, uh… ya a’right?”

Poison’s chest heaved. “Don’t fuckin’ say shit,” they hissed. “Come in.”

Ghoul followed behind them as they turned back into the cramped bathroom and closed the door behind him. 

“What happened?” he asked as they turned back to the mirror, pulling at some longer tufts of hair left on their head as they moved the scissors up and down, unsure where to start. 

“‘T’was just trying something new an’ fucked it up,” Poison muttered under their breath. “It’ll be fine. I’mma fix it.”

“Maybe ya should just stop now,” Ghoul said, moving behind them to look into the mirror with them. “It ain’t bad.”

“‘S fuckin’ bad,” Poison exclaimed, waving the scissors around helplessly. Ghoul ducked his head. 

“Watch it,” he laughed, bringing his hands to either side of the sink with his arms at the sides of Poison’s waist. He reached up to put his chin on their shoulder. “I like it. ‘S just diff’rent, is all. You’ll get used to it.”

Poison bristled, staring back at Ghoul in the mirror with their brows furrowed. “‘S fuckin’ bad and ya know it. Don’t be an asshole.”

“On the Witch, I’m not,” Ghoul said. He brought one tattooed hand up to fluff up one side of Poison’s head. “It’ll be shiny if ya mess with it a ‘lil.”

Poison batted his hand away. They put the scissors down into the sink again. “A’right, I let ya see. Now get out.” 

Ghoul pressed into them further, pushing them up against the sink with his body. “C’mon,” he turned his head into their neck. “Ya did all that bellyachin’ about tellin’ me to fuck off and then ya let me in for what?”

Poison exhaled a deep breath. They imagined stabbing him again. Maybe it would be worth it. They closed their eyes.

“Ghoul,” they sighed, exasperated, “now’s not the time. I let ya in so ya’d shut up, not hump my fuckin’ leg.”

Ghoul shuffled against their back, pushing in closer and grinning at them in the mirror. “‘S’not my fault ya hair looks so good,” he muttered into their neck. “‘S hot. Ya look hot.”

Poison shifted uncomfortably. Ghoul’s body heat against them was causing sweat to begin to form at their temples. They stood up fully, their hips pressing up against the edge of the sink so Ghoul could no longer reach their neck. Instead he pushed against them closer, bringing his hands from the sink to move against their stomach, fingers splayed out against their shirt and a sliver of their cool skin above the hem of their jeans. They found themself arching their back against his touch involuntarily. 

“Ghoul,” they protested again, unable to keep the whine in their voice from escaping their throat. “Are ya fuckin’ serious right now?”

“As a heart attack,” Ghoul mumbled, his face pressing against Poison’s back. “C’mon Pois. Can I try to calm ya down a little?”

Poison grunted in protest, their hands meeting his on their belly. They couldn’t deny that their already tight pants were getting uncomfortable pressed up against the porcelain in front of them.

“You’re a fuckin’ dick,” they said, scrunching their nose as they made their decision. “Make it fast. Last thing we need is one of them other idiots walkin’ in on us.”

Ghoul looked up at them over their shoulder in the mirror, his eyes lit up as if it were Christmas morning. “For real?”

Poison rolled their eyes. “Don’t make me change my fuckin’ mind.”

Ghoul moved so fast Poison thought he would lose his footing and crack his head on the tile. He pushed his full body against them then, so Poison could feel how hard he already was in his own tight pants, his hands moving from their stomach to the their belt in one fluid movement. Being that he was so much shorter, his forehead pressed into their middle back desperately.

“Fuck,” he muttered, still fumbling with their belt, “I really didn’t think ya’d say yes.”

“Then don’t waste my fuckin’ time,” Poison retorted, beginning to lose their breath. They arched up into him further to allow him better access to their belt. He finally wriggled it free, pushing their pants down to their calves with an urgent struggle. They could hear him hit the dirty tile below them as he dropped to his knees. 

His hands grasped their ass cheeks as he started to suck and lick broad stripes up the backs of their thighs. Poison’s stomach lurched.

“Holy shit,” they gasped. “Ghoul, fuck-“ 

His mouth quickly made its way to their hole, wet and needy. He spread them open further with his thumbs as his tongue worked, lapping and sucking.  They could feel him trying to push in, his face fully pressed between their thighs. Their legs went weak, bending over the sink so much their forehead hit the glass of the mirror with a thud. Ghoul was making low, hungry noises into their hole. It felt like electricity was coursing through their entire body. 

Poison arched their back into his face, letting out a loud moan as his tongue flicked in and out of them. His hands were gripping into their skin, moving from their ass to their hips, his face fully enveloped in their body. He pulled back for a moment, nipping softly into the tender flesh of the inside of their thigh.

“‘S good?” he asked from underneath them, his breath hot on their taint. Poison moaned, and Ghoul giggled. “I’ll take that as a yes,” he said, attempting to pull their pants down further, to no avail. “Help me, will ya?”

Poison pushed back to kick their boots off, Ghoul sitting back on his heels behind them. They looked down at him over their shoulder. His black hair had fallen into his face, his eyes heavy with lust, his lips and chin glistening with spit. He was grinning, looking drunk on their pleasure. They let out an involuntary groan as they worked faster, one sock flying off still in their boot. They kicked and pulled and finally were free of their jeans. Ghoul leaned back up, taking one of their thighs into his hand and guiding their leg up to position their foot onto the lid of the toilet next to the sink. 

“Like that,” he coaxed, and then his mouth was back on them again. Poison threw their head back as his tongue moved underneath them, pressing up into the skin of their taint and the back of their balls. They could feel their eyes rolling into the back of their head. 

“Fuck, Ghoul,” they gasped out, “where’d ya learn this?”

He pulled his mouth off of them just long enough to answer. “Jus’ been thinkin’ about it,” he slurred. “Wanted to taste ya.” His tongue moved back to their hole, stiffening to push in and out of their body. Poison felt as if their bones were melting. Ghoul was still making throaty whines, sending vibrations straight through them into their cock. It was unlike anything they had ever felt before.

“‘S it good?” they asked, pressing their head into the mirror again, the muscles in their back and legs tensing. Ghoul groaned a muffled answer into their ass. 

“‘S so fuckin’ good,” he managed out, licking broadly from their balls up to their hole again. “Ya taste so fucking good.” Poison’s whole body shuddered. They closed their eyes, their cock pulsing against the sink. 

“I wanna try,” they breathed. Ghoul pulled back. 

“On… me?”

He let go of his grip on their thighs tentatively. Poison turned and leaned back on the sink to look down at him, their cock swollen, standing up over his face. He looked up at them with wide, bewildered eyes, his face red and wet.

“No, on Show Pony, ya fuckin’ idiot,” Poison spat. “Yes, you. Take ya fuckin’ pants off.”

Ghoul visibly gulped, his Adam’s apple bobbing in his throat. “I still gotta piss,” he said in a small voice.

“I don’t fuckin’ care,” Poison laughed. They felt cruel, but Ghoul had made the thought seem irresistible, and his nervousness made them want it even more. “I wanna try.”

Ghoul stood up with his back against the peeling paint on the opposite wall, looking down at himself timidly as he undid his belt and started working at the buttons of his jeans, refusing to meet their eyes. Poison could see his cheeks flushing pink under his lashes. “I didn’t think…” he started, and then shook his head slightly as he continued to take off his pants, as if he were talking himself out of whatever he was going to say next. Poison thought that was for the best anyway. 

He untied his boots and kicked them off, shuffling his pants down the rest of the way with them. His cock sprung free, pointing up at Poison. Poison felt a tightness coiling in their stomach.

“My dick’s been inside you and ya worried about me seeing your asshole up close or what?” they said. Ghoul glared up at them. 

“No,” he said sheepishly. “‘S just a lot.”

Poison rolled their eyes and pushed up off the sink. “Bend over, idiot.”

They moved around each other awkwardly in the cramped space. The air suddenly felt suffocating and tense. Ghoul bent over the sink, forearms pressed into the warped acrylic. Poison dropped to their knees behind him. 

They gripped at the soft, tattooed flesh of his thighs. The tattoos covered every inch of his skin, even his ass cheeks. They allowed their eyes to wander all over his skin, admiring the artwork they had never really paid attention to before, having only seen it in the dark or under the haze of a lustful encounter where they weren’t really paying attention. Now there was sunlight coming through the small window above the toilet, and they could see every detail. They moved one hand gently along the inside of his thigh, earning them a shudder emanating from his body.  

“Pois,” he groaned out, his knees buckling softly against their touch. They took both hands to his hips and gripped the skin of his thighs firmly with both hands on either side of his ass, feeling the muscles underneath clenching. Their mouth began to water. 

The moved their lips to the skin above the ditch of his knee, sucking softly. He let out a loud breath at the touch of their tongue moving on his skin, knees shaking even more. They gripped his hips harder, moving their mouth upwards, tongue never breaking contact with his skin. They tilted their head towards the soft flesh of his inner thigh, letting their bottom lip go slack as they dragged their teeth along his skin. He shuddered again.

“Pois, fuck, what’re ya-“ Ghoul made a feeble attempt at forming a sentence before Poison took his skin between their teeth and bit down. They could feel him press into the sink, his body attempting to move away from the sudden sting. “Fuck,” he gasped from behind clenched teeth.

The tight coil in their stomach felt as if it would pop at any moment. They dragged their lips to his ass and bit down again, tender skin taut between their teeth. Ghoul sucked in a breath, but didn’t protest. They pulled back with his flesh still in their teeth and let go, feeling it snap back into place under their grip on his hips. They sat back to look at their work so far, seeing small, raised red and purple marks already peppered between the tattoos on his skin. 

“Beautiful,” they whispered. Ghoul whimpered above them. They moved their hands from his hips to the inside of his ass cheeks, spreading him open. His cock hung between his legs, thick and heavy, his hole pulsing as they stared. “Fuck, Ghoulie,” they murmured, running a thumb over his hole. His body shook again. 

Poison pressed their face into him, nose pointed upwards for air, mouth enveloping him fully. He clenched and keeled forward, breath hitching in shock. They pressed into him further, hungry, tongue fully out of their mouth with desperation, running up over his hole and back down again over his taint. They could taste every part of him; sweat, gunpowder, musk, a faint sweetness they couldn’t place. It was filthy and indulgent and gorgeous. They gripped his hips harder, fingers bruising into his skin as they pressed in further. Ghoul was pushing back into them now, his mouth hanging open, his own fingers gripping the sides of the sink desperately. He let out a stuttering moan.

“Fuck, Pois,” he groaned out. Poison moved their tongue back up to his hole, swirling it around and pushing it in. Ghoul convulsed. “I didn’t know - fuck -“

Without warning they pulled back and flipped him around, pushing him back into the sink behind them. He lost his grip in the movement, scrambling as the back of his head connected with the mirror on the wall. Poison moved their mouth to his cock, taking him down into their throat in one movement. Ghoul’s body went slack, practically sitting up on the sink, spitting curses, hands flying to Poison’s wrecked hair. Poison worked him relentlessly, bobbing their head, spit pooling in bubbles at the corners of their mouth. Ghoul writhed, attempting to speak and failing at every turn.

Poison felt that cruel coil twisting in their stomach again as they worked their mouth on his cock, opening their throat for him to thrust into. They looked up at him from underneath their brow. He was a mess, sweaty and flushed and gasping. His shirt was pushed up, curls of dark hair trailing up to his belly creased soft above his cock, smattered in tattoos like the rest of his body. He was looking down at them with dark eyes, jaw completely slack, bottom lip jutted out obscenely. 

They pulled off of his cock with a slurp and took it into their hand, stroking him while moving their mouth up to his stomach. He jostled again under their touch. They opened their mouth wide and took a chunk of flesh from his belly into their mouth, biting down hard.

“Ow, fuck!” he snapped, recoiling away from them. They didn’t relent. Their hand continued working his dick, slick with their own spit as they gnawed into the sensitive skin on his stomach. Both of his hands went to their hair to pull them off. “Pois, stop it, that fuckin’ hurts-“ 

Their jaw slacked. “Let me do it,” they huffed into his skin, drool trailing into his belly button, “gotta have you.”

Ghoul panted, hands still tight in their hair as if he were afraid to let them go. He closed his eyes against their strokes on his cock. “Okay,” he breathed out. “Okay, fine.”

Without hesitation they dragged their tongue across his abdomen and bit down again, this time onto the soft skin above his hipbone. Ghoul jolted, but didn’t argue. They took a fold of tattooed flesh into one side of their mouth, digging their sharp canine in as hard as they could. They wanted to draw blood. They needed to taste every part of him. 

Ghoul gasped sharply as the skin broke, popping softly into Poison’s mouth, flooding them with the bitter taste of copper, mixing with the salty, earthy taste of his flesh. They sucked lightly, needing more. Ghoul was writhing underneath them. Their strokes on his cock had slowed, too overwhelmed with the new experience of his body. They continued to suck into the fatty flesh of his hip, and looked up at him again. He was barely holding himself up, his brows crooked upwards in a pleading expression. He was sweating from every pore, bottom lip trembling. They grunted into his skin and pulled back.

“Tell me what ya want,” Poison breathed. They looked up at him, hand still pumping on his hard cock. They moved it against their cheek, stroking him against their face with a devilish grin. Ghoul’s head fell back.

“Wanna… fuck ya,” he panted out. 

“Ya sure?” Poison teased. “Ya gotta make sure I get mine.”

“I promise,” Ghoul pleaded, head lolling forward to look down at them. Poison was smearing his cock along the side of their face, taking the head into their mouth and painting their lips with it. Ghoul’s breathing stuttered. “Please.”

Poison licked their lips. “Just ‘cause you asked so nice,” they rose up to their feet, leaning over Ghoul, “like a good boy.”

Ghoul moaned and shuddered under Poison, who laughed openly. They grabbed his shoulders and moved him backwards, twisting him around so they could lean themself over the sink in his place. He hit the wall behind them, dazed, blinking slowly a few times before rising back up. Poison spread their legs as wide as they could in the cramped space, and gripped the sides of the sink.

“Be good,” they said. Ghoul moaned shamelessly. Looking at him over their shoulder again, they could see purple bruises covering his stomach and hips, dark blood oozing slowly out of the wound closest to his crotch.  They grinned despite themself.

He lined his cock up with their hole and started to push in, feeling them still loose and slick from his own spit. Poison pushed back into him greedily, their need for him overwhelming the pain. He slid in easily, their muscles pulsing around him.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck,” Ghoul repeated, leaning down to press his forehead into their back again. “Goddamn, Pois, you jus’ fuckin’ - you jus’ take it-“

“I know,” they breathed through gritted teeth, “so jus’ give it to me.”

Ghoul started thrusting into them, pushing them against the cool plastic sink. Poison groaned, one hand moving to grasp back at Ghoul’s hip, leaving the other firmly on the surface of the sink to keep them propped up.

“Fuck yeah,” they moaned, their forehead pressed against the mirror. “Please, more-“

“Now ya sayin’ please?” Ghoul snapped his hips up into them. Poison felt his balls smack tightly against theirs. “Now ya fuckin’ askin’ for it?”

Poison groaned, moving their hips back into Ghoul’s. His cock was sliding over their prostate with every thrust. He was reveling in the tight heat of their body, one arm coming up around their chest, the other moving down to work their cock. They moved their foot back to the lid of the toilet as it had been before, allowing him better access. He made a small noise of appreciation as he thrust in deeper, moving his hand up and down their length in time with his own cock inside their body.

“Just like that,” Poison breathed. They looked into the mirror; their fucked-up hair was worse than ever, longer pieces sticking to their face and neck with sweat; over their shoulder, Ghoul’s eyes were closed, his bottom jaw completely slack, tongue pressed against his teeth as he concentrated on the movement of his hips and his fist. Poison allowed their eyes to roll back. The coil in their stomach was white hot, the feeling moving into their groin and legs. Their knees began to shake. 

“Ghoul, ‘m gonna-“ they tried to get out, but before they could say it they were shooting come over his hand and into the sink, thick, watery ropes adding to the mess of chopped hair they had already made. Ghoul made a choked off, surprised noise as their body clenched and spasmed around him. He worked them through their orgasm, and then brought both hands to their hips, his pace quickening.

“Can I-“ he gasped, “can I come inside ya? Please, Pois.”

Poison braced themself with both hands on the edge of the sink, their body still reeling, their brain fuzzy. The overwhelming feeling of his cock pushing deep into their insides and still sliding over their overstimulated prostate was making it hard to think of anything else at all. 

“Yeah,” Poison breathed out. “Do it.” 

Ghoul moved one of his hands to their hair, making a fist in the hacked up strands, pulling their head back and forcing them into a deeper arch. His pace became relentless, pounding into them. Poison’s foot shook uncontrollably on the toilet, up on their toes, straining to keep themself upright, stars shooting through their vision. 

He gave one final thrust and hilted into them, coming with a low cry, his cock pulsing deep inside them. Poison gasped, stuck in the position he was holding them in as he rode out his orgasm for what felt like an eternity. His grip finally loosened on their hair and hip, and he backed out of them slowly. 

“Don’t move,” he said, low and wrecked.

He dropped to his knees again and pressed his face back up between their thighs, lapping at their now loose hole, tasting his own come. Poison sucked in a sharp breath and exhaled shakily. 

“Destroya, you’re fucking insane,” they moaned. Their cock was already half hard again just from the sensation, Ghoul moving his mouth up and down behind them like it was a holy altar, breaths coming heavy. He finally relented, pressing sloppy kisses to the inside of their thigh, tender and slow. The kisses then trailed across their ass to the inside of their other thigh, nuzzling with his nose. Poison felt frozen in place. They looked up at themself in the mirror again. Their face was bright red, their ears burning hot. “Ghoul,” they muttered. “Ya good back there?”

“Mm,” was his only response. He was still placing small, delicate kisses down their legs, worshipping their flesh underneath his mouth. He moved back up, strong hands coming up to the front of their hips, his face tilting up between their thighs again. Poison closed their eyes and threw their head back. Ghoul was making them feel like a God. 

Suddenly there was a banging on the door so loud they both jumped, Ghoul falling back against the wall behind them, Poison scrambling for their Raygun that they had stashed next to the sink. 

“Ya wanna fuckin’ keep it down in there?” Kobra’s voice came shouting through the door.  “There’s other people that fuckin’ live in this shithole, s’not a goddamn brothel.” 

“We wasn’t doin’ nothin’, mind your own, Kobes,” Poison exhaled and rolled their eyes as they threw the Raygun back down with frustration. “Ghoul’s helpin’ me cut my hair.”

“Ghoul’s helpin’ ya do somethin’ that I don’t wanna hear about,” Kobra yelled back, his voice moving further away as stomping footsteps carried him down the hall. “I never make ya listen to me fuckin’.”

“Ya never get any anyways,” Poison shouted after him. They turned around and looked down at Ghoul. He had one hand covering his mouth, his face flushed pink, embarrassment washed over his expression. “Don’t mind him,” they said. “As my brother he’s legally obligated to ridicule me every chance he gets.”

“I don’ know what ‘ridicule’ means, Pois,” Ghoul said, “but I think he’s doin’ a good job.”

Poison smiled and extended their hand to help him up. They both got dressed again in silence, the small bathroom seeming suddenly less awkward for them both to maneuver around in together. Poison pushed their hair out of their face and picked up the scissors from out of the sink, wiping them off on their pants with a grimace. “Ya sure it looks okay?” they asked, scrubbing their hand through the hair on the back of their head.

Ghoul chuckled. “Nah,” he said. “I was lyin’. ‘T looks like shit. I was jus’ hopin’ you were gonna let me hit.”

Poison scoffed and punched him in the shoulder. “Ya fuckin’ dog. I should have known.”

Ghoul smiled, sticking his tongue out between his teeth. “Ya sure ya don’t want any help? I cut my own hair all the time.”

“An’ it looks like shit, too,” Poison laughed. They handed over the scissors begrudgingly. Ghoul smirked as he took them. “Jus’ promise to make it better and not worse. Please?”

“Of course,” Ghoul said. “Trust me.”