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"eggchan- egg, bro, i need you so badly."
that's all it took to snap him out of his daze. he forced himself to he peel his eye open. wemmbu's legs were on each side of his lap, pinning him down to the bed.
seeing wemmbu on top of him, watching every little move like a predator perched on top of it's prey was something he never expected to see. not in this timeline. for the first time ever, he felt unsafe around wemmbu. he loved him so dearly, why would he even do this?
eggchan looks up at wemmbu. he's staring at him with that look in his eyes. wemmbu opens his mouth to speak.
"egg, you want this, right?"
he says it in that honey-sweet voice that only eggchan has ever heard.
i don't know if i want this.
egg doesn't respond. the words cling to the back of his throat like vomit. he finds himself unable to move as if his body wasn't his own.
wemmbu knows he wants to say no. wemmbu takes his silence as a yes. he knows that egg wouldn't say no after all he's done for him.
wemmbu props himself on his knees and starts unbuttoning egg's dress shirt and tearing off a few buttons while he's at it. he just knows he's going to have a hard time sewing those back on again. after all of this is over, of course.
egg snaps out of his daze for what feels like the hundredth time this night.
wemmbu's cold fingers trace over his lips, almost teasingly.
"open." he orders. and egg, like an obedient dog, let's wemmbu shove his fingers into his mouth.
it's fine. it's for wemmbu after all, isn't it?
wemmbu would never hurt me on purpose. he would never.
he prods them around his mouth and towards the back of his throat, earning a gag from him.
it's fine. it's fine. it's fine.
he pulls his wet fingers out and chuckles as he takes in the horrified look on egg's face. at heart, he knows it's wrong, but he's too deep in.
wemmbu props himself on his knees, sinking into the mattress beneath him. he unbuckles egg's belt and slides down his dress pants just before his thighs.
he leans in on egg's quivering body. he runs a finger across the scars on his pale skin, relishing the feeling of egg shuddering under his touch.
"bro, you look so good, egg."
he makes it sound so fucking innocent. it sickens him. his heart is heavy like that one time wemmbu let him wield his prized mace. egg's fingers tingle when recalling the mace's unforgiving sharp edges against his skin and the scratches left behind by them.
he shuts his eye as hard as he could when he hears the sounds of clothes shuffling again.
there's nothing he could do about it, it's not in his power to do so. it's best if he prays that it's over soon. when was the last time he was in power to do something?
once again, wemmbu's shadow looms over him, and egg's body freezes in preparation for the worst to happen. for the second time ever, he felt unsafe around wemmbu.
instead, he plops down onto the space next to him and drags his limp body closer to himself. egg allows him to position his body to his liking. egg stares down at his body.
he thinks long and hard.
wemmbu has done so much for him, why can't he give wemmbu what he wants? it's just this one time, a little selflessness can't hurt him. he's never really done anything even comparable to what wemmbu has done for him. after all, wemmbu is the only reason why he's still alive. wemmbu and only wemmbu. nobody else except him.
eggchan blankly stares at the dirt ceiling of their fuck-ass base. the ceiling of the base that he helped wemmbu build to steal a random guy's sheep. the base that they built together. the memories of wemmbu laughing at his dumb jokes wash over him. it feels like drowning. it aches more than it's supposed to. eggchan sure is stupid for thinking one of the most feared players on the server would want to be with someone like him.
egg feels hands cup his face. long, slender fingers trace over his tear-stained cheeks.
warmth. comfort.
he forces himself to peel open his eye. every ache in his body is screaming at him not to, but he glances at wemmbu anyways. he hates to admit to himself after what he did to him, but he still thinks wemmbu is as beautiful as the day he confessed to him.
it's dead silent. it almost feels unnatural after spending so many nights full of laughter and banter. the ringing in his ears and their shared heavy breathing accompanied him instead of wemmbu's rambling as if it was trying to fill in the void for him. egg pauses when he feels wemmbu's breath hitch against his neck before opening his mouth to speak.
"im sorry eggchan, buddy-"
it's okay
"im- im sorry, i love you a lot, eggy."
he says it in that saccharine sweet voice that only eggchan has ever heard. egg just wants to find the sharpest tool in their base and stab his ears out.
egg blankly stares at the dirt ceiling, that stupid nickname wemmbu used was annoyingly echoing in his mind. that stupid nickname that wemmbu would use when he made fun of him. that stupid nickname that eggchan would melt at the sound of. that stupid, stupid nickname just twists the knife, or mace deeper into his already aching heart.
egg holds his breath as if he was trying to suffocate himself. or maybe he was. he doesn't know. he doesn't know what to do at this point. he doesn't know what he's going to do now. or what he's going to do tomorrow. is he going to stay with wemmbu? after violating him? after stripping him out of every last drop of dignity he had?
come to think of it, he doesn't really have anywhere else to go. never really had a place to call home except wemmbu's civilization and his own, but those times are way over. especially wemmbu's. maybe he can go find loppezz. she cared about him. and he has to admit, she's beautiful too.
caring, beautiful. caring and beautiful.
just like how wemmbu was before. he was caring to him and only him. he was beautiful like the deep shades of red that always trickled off the sharp blade of wemmbu's sword. a revolting, yet satisfying kind of beautiful. egg isn't sure if he'll ever see that side of him at least after everything that happened tonight. he knows hes guaranteed to see the revolting side of him, at least.
he really used to think that wemmbu was caring and beautiful. he doesn't know what to think of him now.
after all the time they've spent by each other's side, all the words muttered to one another that no one else would ever hear, all the heartfelt promises made to each other, wasted. down the drain. just like all the lives of the players he helped wemmbu kill.
gone. never to be seen on the server ever again.
he really is stupid for shrugging off every single warning sign in wemmbu's behavior for the sake of loving him, a hefty price to pay for being the way he is.
he really was stupid to think he was different from the players that wemmbu trash talked about all the time. to think that he was special to him. to think that he was anything at all.
he exhales loudly, absent-mindedly watching his bare stomach drop down. his eye strains as he tries to ignore the dried come on his stomach.
wind blows outside. the muffled sound of rustling grass reminds him that the world hasn't ended yet. something about nobody on the outside knowing what he has been through makes vomit cling to his throat.
egg swallows down the feeling of unease in the back of his throat, scrunching his nose at the sour taste. his eye struggles to stay open before he drifts off to sleep with pain in his body and an ache in his heart.
nothing on this server lasts forever, especially in the hands of wemmbu. nothing.