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There was something wrong with Tyler.
Well. He thinks so. Something wrong, something wrong he shouldn't even consider with latent curiosity after a simple furtive glance. Wrong, a sin. Tyler's mind is a mess when his gaze lingers, even for a few milliseconds, on a man he finds attractive, striking.
You shouldn't fall into sin—that was what he'd always heard at home and at church. The Bible in his hand stuck to his fingers, the words of the Bible and the church digging into his head like a drill bit embedded in the side of his head. A wrong, fatal, immodest temptation he had to avoid by asking God for strength for someone weak like him, someone easily trapped by the seduction of lustful perversion.
He was tempted, he was broken, and he did not repent of it.
The band grew like foam.
Something Tyler hadn't seen possible in a long time, ever since Nick and Chris decided to leave the band to pursue other dreams. He thought his dream was crumbling as he was left alone, not knowing what to do or how to keep up with his broken band.
But Josh arrived. He appeared after Chris had put down his drums, like an angel sent to guide him away from the path he'd been on since seeing what he loved so much decline. Josh showed up unexpectedly, which made Tyler feel strange, with a latent curiosity he hadn't felt in years.
He had been cured—in quotes—of his disturbance, of that sinful temptation that every pastor dismissed and was cruelly judged under disappointed looks, looks that Tyler still fears to see again if they saw him give in again, feel the tentative tug with which Josh seemed to call him without doing anything.
Every smile, glance, and compliment tugs at his invisible thread, tempting him to fall to his knees before Josh, giving in to the call of corruption that the devil tempts him to touch and explore without feeling the slightest remorse in his being.
Every flex Josh did with every hit he took on the drums was obscene to watch. Watching him there, behind his drum kit, with the sticks hitting with a roughness that Tyler loves to see. Was raw, he could tell just by watching the tension in every muscle the drummer made with each hit, which sent a satisfying tingle of admiration down his spine.
Josh is the devil in disguise, tempting him to sin.
And him? He's simply seduced by obscene lust.
“Do you want to go to Taco Bell today?”
The question comes out like a desperate need to get the drummer's attention, a silent plea with a yearning desire to feel the warm gaze Josh always gives him when he's paying attention. Tyler could swear he saw it too, with the burning tentativeness at the tips of his fingers, the way he seemed reluctant to meet his gaze and not where sin calls them.
Tyler has to lick his lips.
“Today?” Josh thought about it for almost a minute. “Sure. We should take advantage of Mark's absence and eat inside the van. He won't scold us.” He smiled amusedly.
The opportunity Tyler so longed for was there, in the palm of his hand, and he wasn't going to let it slip away.
Forgive me, God, for I have sinned.
The sound of drinking is heard in the van. Tyler has to suppress an almost immodest moan as the taste of natural fruit water floods his mouth. A sweet flavor he savors every last drop from the plastic cup it was served in; the plates and Taco Bell bags are now empty.
“I'm never eating again,” Tyler gasped, stretching out his numb arms. “My stomach hurts, man.”
Josh's laughter echoes in his mind; he can't get it out. No matter how much he prays to the night sky or the ceiling, he can't get it out. Asking for forgiveness is no longer the solution, nor is asking to be healed again. He's no longer healed, no longer has a solution, even though the cruel words of each pastor remain there, intact, pressing on his chest, which feels as if his heart is being ripped out as if it were nothing.
“Me too.” Josh shook his hands, glancing at Tyler furtively before shaking his head. “Want to get some air? You look like you're going to throw up.”
Tyler simply nods, stunned by the food he just ate and the atrocious words sinking into his mind with intensity, a torment he can't escape.
The air is fresh, they're both there. Resting with their heads against the van. That makes Tyler relax, forgetting the words from his church or the disappointed looks from his parents. He was no longer a teenager who felt this way, with feelings he could no longer suppress. He wasn't.
“Are you better?” The drummer spoke, resting his own cheek between his palm.
Tyler takes a deep breath, swallowing each phrase that gnaws at his mind like a loop. He tilts his head to look at his drummer. Tyler smiles, weak and almost forced, as the storm in his chest grows as he watches Josh stand there, looking at him with genuine concern embedded behind those kind eyes that Tyler can't escape or even avoid. No longer, he's fallen under the seduction of sin.
“Can you kiss me?”
The question comes out unfiltered, without hesitation in his tone. It was sincere and an urgent plea he can no longer hide. He can't, not when he always looked for ways to see Josh behind the drums or when his indiscreet gaze burrowed beneath Josh's lips. He can't take it anymore, and he wants to experience firsthand what it's like to be with a man.
“What?” was all Josh said.
Tyler could die. Of course he could, but the urgency still courses through his blood. He runs his hand through his brown hair, tossing it to calm the nerves burning in his stomach.
“Kiss me,” he repeated, biting his lower lip as he felt his tongue burn with the plea, a plea filled with sin. “I need it.”
Josh leaned in.
He held Tyler's hot, trembling face in his hands. He was nervous. He couldn't help but feel like he was in some kind of lucid dream, or maybe the drink was laced with a drug that was now making him hallucinate at the thought of kissing Tyler Joseph. The singer of his band. He had seen many times how relationships between members of the same band didn't end well, especially when it came to the lead singer and his drummer.
Does that matter now? No. But he'll think about it later.
A sly, almost timid touch makes itself felt between their mouths in a way that makes both of them painfully hold the air in their lungs, each searching for a different emotion, a different thought, but the same desire to feel more.
While Josh felt nervous, afraid to think about what would happen in the future, Tyler felt relieved, letting the air out of his lungs through his nose knowing that this was what he had been asking for since his teenage years, to explore what everyone saw as wrong, mistaken, and unmanly.
The union is slow, moving their mouths to the beat in a dance that as time passed, they became urgent, desperate and yearning to explore each other's mouths with the heat burning all their senses without thinking of anything else but the way they seem to fit together, it was terrifying, too strange the way their arms, their mouths and their noses brush against each other like a puzzle, joining in the familiarity of the heat.
Josh's tongue slides against the inside of Tyler's mouth, and he simply relishes it, leaning deeper into the kiss that slowly gained momentum, drenched in the obscene sin, unbridled in the lust Tyler was always tempted to succumb to without remorse.
Restless hands roamed their covered bodies, brushing their knees in a way that made them laugh with unspoken amusement. They seemed oblivious, inexperienced with the idea of kissing or touching, but the kiss was enough to shatter every sense in both of them.
But Tyler wants more, a kiss isn't enough.
Josh is truly the devil in disguise. Tyler bowed before the immodest charm that the Church and the Bible label as evil, an unforgivable sin that can only be escaped by praying, asking God for forgiveness. This is how someone became pure in the eyes of everyone, in the eyes of God.
“Get in the van,” Tyler murmured between kisses, eliciting a breathy moan from Josh as his teeth sank into the flesh of his lip.
Josh obeys orders. They get into the van with a desperation that burns through their bodies, making their clothes uncomfortable, searing their skin with that obscene desire to feel much more than a kiss.
The van door slams shut, and the creaking of the seats crunching together echoes in their minds. Tyler takes a deep breath, lifts the hoodie he's wearing, and throws it onto another seat in the van. His knees bump into Josh's; it was a simple brush similar to the one a moment ago, but the friction made him moan, needing more contact.
“Tyler–” Josh held his breath as he watched Tyler, as his jeans unbuttoned and his gaze fell on that tempting skin, his plump thighs, his tanned skin– Oh, he was tempted to sin too. “What a cute boy.”
The praise rains down on Tyler in a way that makes him groan and nod meekly, lost in the desire to hear whatever praise Josh has to say to him, to make him see that what he feels isn't bad and is something normal that he shouldn't run away from.
The singer's gaze falls on the phone he dropped from his jeans pocket. The burning in his cheeks intensifies at the impure thought he's subjected his mind to. He's fallen, he's no longer devout in the eyes of the church. Why worry about what people will say? It doesn't matter anymore, not anymore.
“Can I give you a blowjob?” Tyler asked, shyness etched in his eyes, those eyes like those of a curious deer.
Josh felt his cock ache at the sight of those eyes, and even more so at the question bouncing around in his mind like a ball.
Shit no, he couldn't deny something that Josh has thought and dreamed about when his days with Tyler ended, that when he got home, he always ended up jerking off and cumming in his hand with Tyler on his mind.
“Yes, you can do it.”
Tyler smiled victoriously. “Before that—this is weird and you don’t have to accept it.” He bit his lower lip, shame still in his throat. “Can we record it? I—yes, I want to remember it and watch it later...”
Where is that church boy? Somewhere in the back of his mind. He seemed forgotten. Even though his faith is weak, he still trusts that he's been heard, even though sin is on his hands like blood.
The drummer's cock twitches at this. The idea of recording something obscene as Tyler's only material is tempting, even for him. Josh nodded, patting the van seat lightly to get more comfortable.
“Only if I have a copy of that,” he nodded, giving the green light to having an explicit video of the two of them, even if it was just blowjob content.
The smile that formed on the singer's lips made his heart ache, and his cock ached at the contraction he felt. Fuck, it was a delight to watch and contemplate Tyler in every situation, no matter the situation. Watching him on stage, at the piano, or writing new ideas for songs they hadn't played yet with so many people listening, watching him eat, sleep— Josh simply wants and yearns for everything with Tyler, his love and his devotion.
He thought he admired him. But during the months they spent together since he joined the band, he realized it wasn't just platonic, it went beyond friendship. Josh loves Tyler.
The sound of the phone's camera snaps him out of his thoughts, and his gaze shifts to the phone being handed to him. The camera isn't recording Josh, but Tyler, whose pleading gaze can be seen on the screen.
Josh understood, holding it in his hands and recording every move Tyler makes in the middle of the van.
“Does it hurt?” Tyler murmured as he slid his hand down Josh's tight jeans, and where he pressed, he felt his dick spasm beneath his palm. “You're about to burst in your pants, dude.”
He frowned at the nickname. He wasn't going to say anything, just let himself be carried away by the intense desire he felt when he felt Tyler's palm brush against his still-clothed dick, trapped in the fabric. He leaned his head back on the seat cushion, trying to capture the singer's flushed face with that phone.
His zipper comes down with a thud, and his surroundings blur as he feels only the warmth of Tyler's hands on his now-bare thighs. He stares at the singer through the screen; Tyler's hands slide up his thighs in a way that makes him sigh and murmur his name.
His jeans are pulled down halfway to his ankles, before Tyler's hungry gaze.
He groans at the sting of that hand on his length, a warmth that is so well received by his cock that his hips buck slightly, eager for Tyler to jerk him off. The camera focuses on Tyler, and he just smiles intently at her before slowly lowering himself until his lips brush against the drummer's pink tip. He licks. His tongue traces a thin stripe along the slit, collecting the precum with his tongue.
It's bitter, but with a hint of sweetness, unlike anything Tyler has ever tasted before. His tongue slides from the phallus, licking the entire base.
“Shit—that feels good,” Josh sighed between a sniffle, closing his eyes as he felt the singer lick his cock. “Tyler... A little more.”
Every sound the drummer made Tyler crave more, leading him to take a little more of that cock between his lips. He swallowed. His lips surrounded his length, and he felt the inside of his mouth shudder, shaking in a way that made Tyler moan, sending vibrations through Josh's cock that made him grunt.
Josh almost forgot about the camera when he felt that mouth take hold of his cock. He focused precisely, watching the drool oozing from the plump lips surrounding his length, following it with his eyes until he saw Tyler's eager gaze fixed on the camera behind the screen before he looked up.
He put that phone away for a moment.
Their gazes connect in the silence of the van, the only thing audible between them was only one thing, the sound of their own labored breathing like the impure noise of Tyler sucking his cock.
He was going to cum right there if Tyler kept looking at him.
He could just feel Tyler taking his entire cock into his mouth, the heat flooding him making him curse and clench that phone in a way that nearly tore at him. He took a deep breath, relaxing the tension in his body. It was so hot, so unbearable, that Josh responded by lifting his hips and slamming into the singer's throat.
“Mgh.. just like that” he purred, running his hand through Tyler’s brown hair and patting his head.
The singer can only respond with a moan of joy, knowing he's pleasing him even though it's the first time he's had a cock in his mouth. His eyes glaze over and he sobs as Josh's cock reaches the deepest part of his mouth. He chokes, gag reflex burning in his throat every time he goes a little deeper.
It was unpleasant and painful, but Tyler is so absorbed that he keeps going. Dizzy with the pleasure he feels throughout his body, he needs to feel more pain.
There's really something very wrong with him.
He hollows his cheeks when he feels ready, sliding his head up and down subtly, savoring all the strange textures in his mouth. He can feel the heaviness of his length resting on his tongue, in a way that makes him hum for more sensation.
Every gasp, grunt, or moan Josh lets out reaches his own clothed cock. He has to clench his thighs together, feel some friction, though it was more than just delicious pain that made him moan against the drummer's dick, causing Josh to push his head a little deeper, almost suffocating him.
Drool sloppily wets his lips and the drummer's cock between each thrust, his head following the same up-and-down motion but with each quick step, choking when the tip reaches his throat with the help of Josh's movement, he is precise, sucking, curling his tongue when he reaches the swollen tip.
He uses his teeth, just a little, savoring the texture of that hardness that rests so well on his tongue.
He takes a deep breath, slowly pulling away from his dick, which is a mess of spit. Soaked, it joins a trail of drool on Tyler's lips in a way the camera captures perfectly, obscenely and shamelessly. The scene is deliciously kinky, making Josh moan and searing that image into his mind, one he would remember for the rest of his life.
He licked the tip in a way that makes Josh moan and squeeze Tyler's brown hair as his lips wrapped around the sensitive tip, dripping non-stop and even staining the singer's beautiful, swollen, pink lips with his pre-cum, a sight he can't tear his eyes away from, nor the camera that focuses on him perfectly.
“Cum in my mouth, I want to taste you,” Tyler whispered, rubbing Josh's slick tip against his lips like a balm.
Yes, that was what Josh was going to do as soon as he saw Tyler wrap his lips around his hardness.
His hand pumped Josh's hardness, his mouth still glued to his slit, using only his tongue as his precum oozed out, sucking him clean, only to watch him ooze out in abundance. His eyes remained fixed on Josh; he forgot about the camera, even though it was still recording his inappropriate actions.
“Close– Tyler, I'm gonna cum...” He moves his hips as the tip spurts more and more cum, a sign that he's about to cum. Everything spins, Tyler's tongue curls or sucks in a way that makes him gasp, growl like an animal at the intensity of his longed-for orgasm. “Fuck!”
His eyelids flutter shut, and he grips the phone so tightly his knuckles turn white from the force. His cum spurts directly onto the singer's face and mouth, the intensity making him dizzy at times; he swears he can feel the van spinning. His body trembles, his dick continues to eject fluid until he can't take it anymore.
“That was hot,” Tyler said, fascinated, touching the now-limp cock resting on his belly. “Do you always cum too much? Mhm, I like the way it tastes.”
Josh gasps at Tyler's light touch on his now-sensitive cock and opens his eyelids as he watches Tyler's cum-covered face. A blush spreads across his face as he sees how busy Tyler is licking up every drop. He shouldn't have gotten another hardness with that sight. He was sensitive, but the blood was circulating through his dick instead of his brain; the orgasm had altered his coherence.
Tyler noticed and smiled, amused by it.
“I want...” His throat burns with realization, devastated by how Josh used his mouth. “Oh, adjust the camera properly in that corner.” He pointed.
He just has to point, and Josh obeys, letting the camera continue to record their bodies from a good angle, capturing their reactions. Tyler smiles through blurred vision, tears in his eyes as he thinks about how that cock he now longed to feel inside him had fucked up his throat.
Too bad they can't take the risk, not when they're on a tight schedule and Mark could arrive at any moment and catch them there, in the middle of their indecent act.
“Tyler...” He stifled a moan as the only garment covering Tyler slid down to his ankles, his body growing even hotter as he watched him straddle his and place his hands at his sides.
“We can't do that much... But-” He bit his lip in embarrassment. “You can fuck my thigh.”
Tyler knows he can no longer look in the mirror without feeling like he hasn't found the strength to keep himself from falling into evil, not when his mouth has already been desecrated since he asked for a kiss. Beyond responding to another man's touch, his body was already wracked by the fog of lust.
Josh just thought with his other head.
Tyler's hips move in a clumsy rhythm on his lap, the touch of his sensitive cock rubbing against the singer's dripping hardness in a way that makes them both gasp in surprise at the friction. Tyler arches his back, satisfied with the minimal touch he receives on his needy cock.
“Squeeze your thighs together, Ty,” he demanded sweetly, taking his cock in his own hand and gasping at the tingling sensation that ran through his sensitivity. “God...”
God.
Tyler tensed for a moment at that. He swallowed as a shiver ran through his body; he felt sick, very sick. What would your parents say? Sinner.
He just shakes his head, agitated. “Hah... Like this? I d-don't know how to do it.”
Josh's laughter eases the squeezing pain in his chest, accompanied by a sweet, shy chuckle that intensifies as he feels the drummer's firm hands holding him by the hips to help him calm down. He gasps at the sticky, warm sensation of Josh's cock sinking into his thighs.
Instinctively, he squeezes his thighs together, eliciting a breathy moan from Josh, who simply moves his hips to withstand the friction.
He looks up at the camera, which records everything closely, where they can clearly see their bodies merging in the sinful act called sex. Tyler lifts his hips and then lets himself fall, hearing another moan from the drummer as his cock rubs against the plump flesh of his thighs.
“Fuck... Like that, Tyler–” Josh looked at him, sliding one of his hands down Tyler's belly until he used his hand to give the singer the same pleasure.
“Mmm!” His body trembles at the sudden surge of Josh jerking him off while his cock fucks his thighs with several twitches. “Josh- Josh... ah, that feels good!”
He squeezes his thighs together, moving his hips up and down in a motion that soothes the sensation of his dick in Josh's wet palm. Ecstasy envelops them in a way that leaves them breathless, filling the van with an unmistakable scent of every obscene act they've performed with just a kiss and the latent curiosity Tyler was finally able to quell by savoring what it's like to be with another person.
What it's like to taste and touch Josh.
“I don't think I can take it, Tyler,” Josh sobbed. Having just had an orgasm had already made him hypersensitive to everything, every touch, every clench Tyler's thighs made against his cock. He was going to come again, aware of the scorching heat in his groin.
Drool drips from Tyler's swollen lips, and he tilts his head back as the drummer's nimble fingers circle his precum-soaked slit. The heat builds, more intense, so impossible to ignore that he just mumbles and curses with each burst of euphoria that washes over him.
“I-I, yeah... Also, I'm close-” He sighed, rubbing his thighs together and helping him reach his orgasm and that was well received by Josh, who praised him before taking him by the back of the neck firmly.
Teeth and tongues clash, their moans silenced between their mouths, which attack each other urgently, claiming every inch with teeth and tongues. One moan in particular is smothered between kisses, plaintive and agitated by Josh. Everything in him tenses for a second, until he stills and can only moan into the singer's mouth, who savors every sound.
Josh came first, with an even bigger load than before, sobbing and cursing under his breath. Tyler followed, feeling the warmth of Josh's cum stain his thighs, and even more as he was jerked off, making him cum, staining his shirt even more with his own cum.
His thighs are stickier, with spots stained with cum like his shirt. The silence in the van is present, only a restless breath along with the last sound of a final kiss between them.
They both turn to look at the camera. Josh mumbles something and grabs the phone that recorded everything that happened there. The sound of the recording stopping makes Tyler smile, who simply snuggles into the drummer's neck and kisses the area.
“We have to clean everything up before Mark comes.”
Tyler nodded, slumping back in his seat, the dampness of sweat and cum sticking to his skin. He wrinkled his nose, taking his time making his voice sound almost normal and not brittle.
“Gross, your cum and mine are on my shirt,” he let out an amused laugh, wiping off some of that particular liquid and putting his hoodie back on.
Everything was in its place, no foreign liquids stained the seats, and there was no trace of anything between them. Normal, something Tyler just swallows, unsure of what to say or not say, and how not to end up in an awkward situation with Josh.
Josh feels the same.
Neither of them dared to say more than simply look at each other and look away in unspoken shame.
Was it wrong to record? Did he give in to the desire to sin, ruining their friendship? A bitter taste hit his throat, repeating over and over how guilty he feels, asking for forgiveness if everything he did wasn't meant to be. A sinner, a unholy man.
“Whatever you’re thinking,” Josh took his time, licking his dry lips as he continued, “I don’t want our friendship to suffer, dude.”
The nickname hurt; he didn't want to just be his friend. He didn't want that, but he had to be patient.
Tyler simply nodded, "Thanks, I really appreciate it."
Neither he nor Tyler said anything for the rest of the day, nor when Mark returned and they began another trip to some cheap hotel.