Chapter Text
“What are you reading?”
Rey slams the book shut when she hears a voice that shouldn’t be here.
That voice.
Looking down from where she hovers in midair confirms his presence in the grove—or at least in her mind, and Rey loses her concentration at the sight of him.
She expects to fall, as she did in the early days of her training. She can almost feel the approaching collision with dirt, rocks, and branches.
But two strong arms catch her this time, and Rey shivers at the proximity.
She’s seen Kylo since their last meeting in Snoke’s throne room, but always in fleeting glances, cloudy images, or dreams.
And she hasn’t touched him since they fought back to back, when her hand found his hip on instinct.
It felt so natural to touch him in that moment…and before that, to reach out her hand toward his through their bond…to yearn for the growing closeness between them...
Her cheeks heat at the memories and desires, but Rey reminds herself this man is her enemy.
She scrambles out of his grip. “Leave,” Rey says, as she regains her footing.
“You were the one who brought me here. Are you sure that’s what you want?” Kylo replies, that annoying arrogance still lacing his tone.
“I told you to leave,” she repeats.
“But you were thinking about me.”
“I was thinking about Ben Solo,” Rey says, struggling to see the lost Jedi boy—the son of Han and Leia—in the cruel Supreme Leader in front of her. “This book belonged to him,” she adds.
She noticed initials inked along the inside cover right before she started thinking about his former self, but she didn’t mean to conjure up the current version.
“And what mysteries are you reading about? Hoping to find a way to master the Force on your own, or have you realized you need a teacher?”
“I don’t need you as my teacher,” she answers. “I’ll destroy this dyad without your help.”
“You honestly think you can do that?” Kylo says with a scoff. “Snoke was lying. He didn’t create this bond between us—it was the Force. And you can’t undo something that powerful.”
“How much do you want to bet?”
Kylo’s eyes narrow. “There’s nothing you have—”
His words stop as soon as a stray thought enters her mind unbidden. She doesn’t have any material wealth, and he knows she would never betray the Resistance for him.
But she does have something he wanted once.
“You’ll hand yourself over to me when you fail,” he says, his voice cold.
“No, I won’t.”
“That’s what I’ll receive when I win, but you can make your own terms—however pointless—for whatever happens in the event that you win.”
Rey takes a deep breath. This man infuriates her, but the bet provides an interesting opportunity.
“If I win—no, when I win,” she begins, “you’ll give up being the Supreme Leader and surrender yourself to the Resistance.”
A dark smile spreads across his lips. “Very well,” he replies. “But we’ll need a time limit in place. I won’t wait forever for you to be by my side.”
“And it won’t take me forever to get rid of you.”
“One standard year then?” Kylo asks. “Or will you need more time to come to terms with your fate?”
“A cycle’s more than enough time.”
“Good,” he replies. “I look forward to the next time the calendar falls on this date. We’ll make it our anniversary.”
Rey’s body tenses in frustration. Her lips part, but he’s gone before she can voice a retort.
The man drives her mad, but she’ll find a way to sever their connection.
Then she’ll see him locked away in a lonely cell.
~~~
“This will hurt.”
The droid’s warning is probably important, but Rey’s trying to clear her mind of everything. Despite her best efforts, though, she can’t keep the mechanical voice out of her head.
“The pain will likely be worse than the original injury,” the droid continues. “We need to go deep to ensure no infection develops.”
Rey nods, as she wills her mind to stop replaying events from earlier in the day when she encountered bounty hunters sent to kill her.
But she can’t stop herself from thinking about them, as the droid’s tools dig into her bicep. Those cowardly assassins were no doubt sent by the First Order—by him—and she wants to ask him why he bothered to make the bet with her if he just planned to have her executed.
“Executed?”
That voice once again sounds in her mind.
She wanted to clear her thoughts for this specific reason—so she didn’t summon him again.
But opening her eyes, Rey knows her plan didn’t work. “Go away,” she tells him.
Kylo ignores her. “What happened to your arm?”
As usual, he can see her, but he can’t see what’s around her. Rey wants to cover the wound to keep him from staring, but the droid is busy working.
“It’s not your concern,” she says.
“If someone hurt you—”
“You,” she interrupts. “You hurt me. Or at least your henchmen did, acting on your orders.”
“I didn’t give that order.”
“And I’m supposed to believe that?” Rey asks, before she winces.
The droid grips her arm now and repeatedly jabs at her wound, trying to do its job—no matter the pain to Rey.
Suddenly, the droid releases her and flies across the room, crashing into a nearby wall.
“You aren’t supposed to be able to see my surroundings,” she says nervously. If he can see her now within the Resistance base, who knows what danger they might be in.
“I can’t see your surroundings,” he replies. “The droid touched you, and that let me see the useless piece of scrap metal while it caused you pain.”
“The droid was repairing the damage,” she scolds.
“It was hurting you,” he argues.
Rey stands, her aggravation with Kylo boiling over. “You hurt me,” she repeats. “You sent those assassins who decided to target kids to try to distract me.”
“You shouldn’t lower your guard—no matter the circumstances,” he replies coldly.
“You expect me to just let innocent people die?”
“I expect you to protect yourself,” he hisses. “But because you’re clearly incapable of that, we’ll have to work on that skill once you’re by my side.”
“I won’t need that skill after you surrender and the First Order is gone.”
Kylo grabs her elbow with his bare hand, and Rey wonders what his next move will be. Is he tired of playing these games, and he’s just going to kill her now? Can he do that through their bond?
“I doubt I could kill you through our dyad,” he says, as if he heard her thoughts as clearly as her words. “And why would I want to? You’ll be mine soon enough.”
Soothing warmth seeps into her arm where his hand touches her skin, and she feels the wound begin to heal.
“The Force is better than a droid at repairing this type of an injury,” he says, as he looks down at his work.
Kylo is close to her now. Rey only needs to tilt her head slightly to see the firm line of his jaw…and the scar she left on his cheek.
Her fingers go up to touch the jagged mark, and he doesn’t pull away.
“Can the Force heal a scar?” she asks before she can stop herself. Rey’s curious about the limitations of the Force, and she doesn’t want to bother Leia with every question that enters her mind.
And Kylo is right here—someone who read every Jedi text he could find as a boy. He probably has the answers, and she can’t stop her curiosity.
“It may be possible, but I’ve never tried,” he replies, something guarded in his voice. “Does my scar…repulse you?”
Rey doesn’t expect vulnerability from the Supreme Leader, but she knows what she heard. And she can’t stop herself from offering honesty in return.
“No,” she answers, her finger tracing the outline of his scar. “It doesn’t repulse me. It…it makes me think I’ve left a mark on you, and I wonder—no, never mind. It doesn’t matter.”
She pulls her hand away, but Kylo doesn’t let her go far, keeping his hold on her arm.
“What does it make you wonder?” he asks.
“I…I wonder if you think of me when you look at it,” she admits.
“Every day.”
Rey swallows down her emotions, before she realizes something. “But you don’t pull me into your thoughts as often as I pull you into mine.”
“Because I’ve had more practice shielding my mind,” he says. “I would teach you to do the same, but…”
“But what?”
“I don’t want you to keep me out.”
He’s too close, and his hand feels too good on her skin.
Rey forces herself to remember this isn’t Ben Solo in front of her. This is Kylo Ren, who sent assassins to murder children in order to stop the Resistance.
“I’ll find a way to keep you out permanently,” she says. “No matter how many times you try to kill me.”
“I didn’t try to kill you,” he insists. “And you won’t find a way to win this bet.”
“You’re delusional.”
Kylo groans in frustration before disappearing.
Left alone in the infirmary, Rey repairs the medical droid.
There’s still a trace of an injury to her arm, as if Kylo didn’t have enough time to finish the healing…or he wanted to leave his own mark. But Rey doesn’t bother to have the droid fix it. The scar doesn’t bother her.
Hours later, she makes her way to the mess hall, where she finds Poe and Finn talking animatedly.
“The First Order’s destroying themselves from within,” Poe says firmly, slapping his hand on the table.
“What do you mean?” she asks, setting her tray down beside them and taking a seat.
“You know how two of those bounty hunters got away?” Poe asks.
Rey nods in reply, hating that those monsters are still on the loose and no doubt hurting others.
“They’re dead,” Poe explains. “Same with the general or whatever higher-up sent them after us.”
“Dead?” Rey questions. “How?”
“Rumor has it the Supreme Leader went off on them,” he answers. “Probably upset they failed and you slipped through their fingers.”
Rey mutters some form of agreement before contemplating another reason for Kylo’s actions.
He claimed he didn’t give the order to have her killed, and if that were the case, did he unleash his anger on the people who tried to hurt her?
She lets her fingers trace the new scar on her arm and wonders what all of this means.
~~~
“Do you want another?”
The Twi’lek behind the bar stares at her expectantly, waiting for an answer.
Rey makes the mistake of shaking her head, and the room spins.
She grips the counter to steady herself and closes her eyes.
A shiver runs down her spine as she tries to find both her physical and mental balance. After a few drinks, Rey can sense far too much in this cantina.
There’s a warm, pleasant feeling from the corner her friends occupy. Finn is passed out—like Rey, unaccustomed to the strong beverages served here, but Poe and Rose are keeping up with their hosts. They need this meeting to go well to secure supplies for the next few months, but the others will have to accomplish that task without Rey’s help.
The alcohol is making her lower her guard. She can pick up on the lustful thoughts from several of the patrons—all aimed at her. Rey’s not used to this kind of attention, and she doesn’t want to hear people thinking about what it would be like to have sex with a Jedi…
Sex with her…
A man with particularly loud thoughts at the end of the bar makes her want to be sick.
Rey pushes herself away from the counter and stumbles toward the lodging wing. She wants to lock herself in her room until the depraved patrons are gone and the alcohol is out of her system.
But the man from the bar follows her, and she turns around to face him in the corridor outside her room.
“You don’t want to mess with me,” she says.
“But I think I do,” he replies. “I think you want me to.”
Rey groans at the man’s stupidity. She may be intoxicated, but that doesn’t mean she’s defenseless. The Force is right there at her fingertips, waiting for her to make a move against this wretch.
The man must be from some kind of telepathic species, because he sends graphic images into her mind. Rey doesn’t want to be with this stranger, and she doesn’t want to think about being with him.
However much she denies it, there’s only one person she wants to be with, and she can’t stop her mind from focusing on that person. Maybe those more desirable thoughts can help erase the lewd suggestions from the man in front of her.
But the stranger comes closer, trying to touch her.
Rey recoils, and her back collides against something solid…and angry.
“Where are you?”
That voice sounds ready for violence.
“I’m busy at the moment,” she tells the newcomer, before turning back to the stranger. “Leave now before I make you regret staying.”
“Don’t be like that,” the man says, letting his fingers graze Rey’s cheek. “We could have fun—”
The man’s words are silenced as Kylo throws him against a wall. A loud crack sounds in the hallway before the man falls to the ground unconscious, but Rey can sense he’s still breathing.
“You shouldn’t have done that,” she tells Kylo.
“That vermin deserved worse. If I were there…if I still had him in my sight—”
Rey turns toward the wall of muscle that is a shirtless Kylo Ren. She tries to ignore his distracting body and focus on a more pressing concern. “But you can’t see him,” she says. “You can only see me, right?”
“And I saw the thoughts that man projected toward you,” he answers, with venom in his voice.
“Those weren’t real,” she says, shaking her head and trying to push the images out of her mind.
“I didn’t know that at first,” he says, his fingers curling into a fist at his side. “I could just sense you weren’t being careful and that you weren’t alone.”
Footsteps from a nearby corridor draw Rey’s attention. She can’t have someone see her in conversation with nothing—or with Kylo Ren, so she pulls him toward her quarters and locks the door behind them.
The effort makes her dizzy, and Rey holds her forehead in her hand.
“Something’s wrong,” he says, and Rey can tell from his tone he’ll pester her until she explains.
“I’m not used to the alcohol on this planet,” she says before looking up at him again. “But no, I won’t tell you where I am or what I drank.”
She won’t give him any clues to her location, and surprisingly, Kylo doesn’t ask her any questions.
Instead, he places his large, cool hand against her cheek, and she can’t help but lean into his touch.
“Let’s be done with this foolish bet,” he says softly. “Come to me now, and I will keep you safe.”
She takes a step back from him. “I don’t need you to keep me safe. I would’ve dealt with him.”
“Of course you would’ve,” he says, and Rey can tell he’s not lying. He believes she’s capable of defending herself. “But you don’t have to be alone,” he adds.
“I’m not alone,” she replies. “My friends are with me.”
“Are they?” Kylo asks. “Why didn’t they help you just now?”
“I didn’t need their help with him,” she insists. “But you know what? I think I will go back to them. I don’t need to stay here with some illusion. I’ll go have another round with Poe.”
Rey moves toward the door, but she doesn’t make it far. Hands grip her wrists and then turn her, leaving her arms locked behind her back and her chest pressed against Kylo’s.
“Let me go,” she protests.
“No,” he hisses. “You’re not going near the pilot right now.”
“You can’t tell me what to do,” she argues, struggling to escape his grip.
But the alcohol in her system gives Kylo the advantage. There’s no way to free herself.
“You aren’t going anywhere,” he says, his voice like ice.
And that’s when Rey senses it—the current of emotions radiating off him. She doesn’t know if they’ve always been there, and she just needed to drop her defenses to feel them…or if Kylo can no longer contain them.
He’s not being difficult or disagreeable just to annoy her.
“You’re jealous,” she says.
“Is there something I should be jealous about?”
He tries to make his tone sound as if he doesn’t care, but Rey knows the truth now.
“Yes, you should be jealous.”
His nostrils flare as he grits out a response, “And why is that?”
“My friends can be in the same room as me,” she begins. “They can touch me whenever they feel like it, and I can touch them. And I do touch them—I hug them, and I hold them—”
“But you don’t think about them,” he interrupts, tightening his grip on her.
“What are you—”
“When you touch yourself, you don’t think about them.”
Her face burns.
He can’t know about that. It was only a few times, and he never showed up when she did that. How—?
“I don’t have to show myself to you,” he explains. “But I can still see you when you think of me.”
Rey wants to hide, but there’s nowhere to go. The only thing she can do is turn her gaze down toward his pecs rather than look at his dark, frustrating eyes.
“It didn’t mean anything,” she lies.
“Yes, it did,” he counters. “You want me…almost as much as I want you.”
She glances up at him then. “You don’t want me,” she protests.
But Kylo presses his forehead to hers and offers her a glimpse of his thoughts.
Rey feels his need and desire…for her.
He can’t find release unless he thinks of her, but he longs for more than just sex between them…
He wants her by his side in everything he does…
He never wants her to know fear or hunger or loneliness again…
He’ll destroy the galaxy to keep her from suffering…
Rey has never felt so wanted, and she can’t help the desire building inside her. She needs to touch this man, and she wants him to touch her. Being pressed against Kylo isn’t enough.
And he must pick up on her thoughts.
Suddenly his hands are gone from her wrists and instead grip her ass. Her fingers curl into his hair, and her legs wrap around his waist, pulling him closer to her.
Their fantasies are becoming a reality through this bond they share, as her core grinds against the hardness in his pants.
“Please,” she whispers into his ear, but Rey doesn’t know exactly what she’s begging for.
Does she want him to stop? No, she doesn’t want that…
To keep doing what he’s doing? Maybe…he’s on the right track…
To do more? Yes—that’s what she wants him to do.
His lips press against hers…and her legs lock behind his ass…and the two of them should be closer…
They need to be closer.
Her back is against a wall as her nails dig into his skin. His hips rock in a perfect rhythm, creating friction, but her body craves more.
Rey wishes there were fewer clothes between them. Kylo seems to want the same, but he makes no move to undress them. Instead, he keeps her pressed against the wall, driving her closer to the edge.
Yes…oh, yes…
Please…
The word comes from his thoughts this time.
“Leave the Resistance,” he says to her through their bond, while he deepens the kiss. “The year’s already halfway gone. Come to me now.”
She pulls away from his lips then and looks in his pleading eyes, as they both struggle to catch their breath.
“Why do you always ask for the impossible?” Rey says.
“Why can you never choose me over your precious Resistance?”
They both stare at one another, as the longing hangs in the air between them.
“Rey?” Rose’s voice calls from outside her chamber, and Kylo immediately sets her down.
“It won’t be long,” he says. “You’ll be with me soon."
He disappears then, and Rey can’t help but wonder whether she’ll break the bond in time.
Or if she even wants to.