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After years or hooking up behind the scenes, they decided it was finally time to start dating. They were four months in when Kaoru called him with what he thought was exciting news. He was offered a position with the Kyushu Art Alliance to be their main calligraphy artist. It was a great contract with an enormous salary. The only downside was that he couldn’t claim any of his paintings as his, and they would have to move out of Okinawa.
Kojiro refused to move with him and Kaoru took the job anyways, shattering their relationship.
Five years go by without contact.
They meet again for the first time in years at Kojiro’s engagement party, at Kojiro’s own home. He sure as hell did not invite Kaoru:
Kojiro felt his heart drop as he looked up to see Kaoru standing there. It’s as if time itself has stopped, and all he can do is stare.
He's completely taken aback, his mind trying to process what he’s seeing. Kaoru is really here, right here, in front of him after five years.
His friends notice his reaction, and they start to whisper amongst themselves. They nudge him, trying to snap him out of his daze, but Kojiro doesn’t respond. He’s too stunned to move.
His thoughts race, trying to figure out if he was seeing things. ‘Why now?’ He tries to make sense of the situation, but his mind is cloudy with confusion and disbelief. He’s torn between wanting to confront Kaoru and wanting to run away, to avoid dealing with the complicated feelings that resurfaced.
Kari, his fiancée, grabbed onto his arm. “Surprise!” she says cheerfully. Totally unaware of his true feelings.
He jumped at the sound of Kari’s voice, having been so lost in his thoughts that he forgot she was even there. He fumbles to compose himself, forcing a smile as he turned towards her.
“I wasn’t sure if he was going to make it, so I didn’t say anything to you. Isn’t it wonderful to see your old friend again?” she said excitedly, looking proud.
Kojiro’s mind raced even more as he realized that this must have been a surprise orchestrated by Kari. A pang of annoyance rocked through him that she would do something like this without consulting him first.
“Ehh yeah, you got me. I’m surprised all right.” Kojiro replied dryly, trying to hide his true feelings and failing. He stole a glance back at Kaoru, who was now engaged in conversation with some other guest.
His hands clenched into fists at his sides, a mix of emotions coursing through him. On one hand, he’s angry at himself for reacting so strongly to Kaoru’s presence. On the other hand, he’s furious at Kari for putting him in this awkward position. Nothing like feeling trapped between his past love and his current fiancée.
“I thought you’d be happy to see him.” Kari says, picking up on his tension. “Didn’t you two used to be close friends?”
“We were,” Kojiro muttered, he can’t bring himself to say more, afraid of what might come out if he does.
Her eyes looked up at him expectantly, she wanted him to go talk to him. Kojiro took a deep calming breath. “Right... I'll go say hi." He says to her. Well, he has to face the fire sooner or later. His friends were watching him now, seeing how he'd react.
‘Well, he was never a coward before,’ he thought as he marched over to Kaoru with a totally fake grin. He slung an arm over Kaoru’s shoulder abruptly. “Hey, buddy.”
Kaoru stiffened underneath his arm.
Kojiro turned to the person Kaoru was talking to and smiled apologetically. “Hey, sorry Momoka, I need to borrow this guy for a minute. Hope you don’t mind.” He casually makes apologies to his neighbor as he dragged Kaoru into the nearest quiet room, which happened to be his office.
He shut the door behind them.
He doesn’t waste any time with pleasantries, getting straight to the point.
He swung towards Kaoru with a scowl. “What the hell are you doing here?” Kojiro hisses, his voice low but full of anger and confusion.
Kaoru looked taken aback by Kojiro’s aggressive tone, but he regains his composure quickly. He knows he has no choice but to explain himself. “I came because I received an invitation from your fiancée.” Kaoru says calmly, trying to keep the tension low. He knows Kojiro is not going to like what he has to say, but he feels obligated to be honest.
Kojiro threw his hands up in the air in anger. “So?” he says, his voice rising in volume.
Kaoru raised his chin. “She said she thought it would be nice for us to catch up.” Kaoru replied calmly. He could tell that Kojiro was getting more and more agitated so he must tread carefully.
“Catch up?” Kojiro says incredulously. “After all these years, after everything between us, and she thought it would be a good idea to invite you over so we could- What? Chit-chat over drinks?”
Kaoru gave him a look like he was being ridiculous. “I know it seems strange, but she was genuinely trying to do something nice.” Kaoru says trying to sound reassuring. He can see that Kojiro was struggling to keep his emotions in check, and he knows that he needs to be the calm one right now.
“Nice?” Kojiro echoes with sarcasm in his voice. Words were failing him. He took a few seconds to compose himself. “Do you know what kind of position that puts me in? I’m engaged, and you just show up after five years and act like nothing’s happened? Like we can just pick up where we left off?”
Kaoru takes a deep breath, understanding Kojiro’s perspective. “I know this must be shocking and confusing for you...” he said mockingly. “…but I’m not trying to disrupt your life or cause you any pain. I didn’t even want to come at first, but your fiancée is quite persistent.”
“Yeah, I know.” Kojiro grumbles, his anger momentarily subsiding. “But that doesn’t change the fact that you’re here now, and it’s making things so much more complicated. You should have made up an excuse and stayed home!” he argued.
Kaoru’s voice went quiet. “You’re right. I shouldn’t have come.” He said looking down. He could see the pain in Kojiro’s eyes and it made him feel uncomfortable.
“Damn right, you shouldn’t have.” Kojiro mutters, running a hand through his hair. He’s torn between wanting to rant at Kaoru and wanting to smother him in a bear hug.
Kaoru can sense Kojiro’s inner turmoil and desperately wants to make things right. “I’m sorry,” Kaoru says sincerely.
Kojiro narrowed his eyes waiting for the other shoe to drop, Kaoru never apologizes, for anything.
Kaoru pressed on, “I didn’t mean to cause trouble for you. I just… I just wanted to see you.”
The raw emotion in Kaoru’s voice made him look down at him, really look at him.
His rival's golden eyes looked troubled. The makeup he wore barely hiding the dark circles under his eyes and the flush in his cheeks.
A pang went through Kojiro’s chest. The mixture of sadness, longing, and nostalgia runs through him. He wants to stay mad at Kaoru and wants to push him away, but he just can’t make himself.
He caved. “Why?” he asks, his voice barely above a whisper. “Why did you want to see me after all this time?”
Kaoru takes a deep breath, trying to figure out how to put his feelings into words. “Well… because I’ve missed you. I’ve missed you so much, Kojiro,” he confessed. “I know I was the one who ended things between us, but that doesn’t mean I’ve forgotten you. I’ve never stopped thinking about you.”
Kojiro was rocked back by the honesty. He had assumed Kaoru had moved on, and had forgotten him, especially after the way things ended between them. Hearing him say that he had missed him, that he hadn’t stopped thinking about him… Kojiro felt a lump form in his throat, the emotions he had been suppressing for so long threatening to surface.
He tried to keep his composure, but he can’t hide the effect that Kaoru’s words had on him. Something shifted inside of him as old memories began to rise up.
He blinked back the tears and forced himself to lock up the past again where it belonged.
“Get out,” he rumbled, his voice coming out thick and rough.
Kaoru stared back at Kojiro, his heart breaking at the coldness in his voice.
While he could see the tension in Kojiro’s stance, and the way he’s trying to keep himself closed off from him. He noticed there was the internal struggle playing out in his mind as his eyes shifted back and forth. He still had a chance.
“No,” Kaoru challenged. “Not until we talk.”
Kojiro is caught off guard by his refusal, but he doesn’t let it show. He crossed his arms defensively, trying to maintain a façade of indifference.
He cleared his throat. “It’s my house, jerk.”
Kaoru crossed his arms too. “I’m a guest and I was invited here.”
“Well, this is me uninviting you.” Kojiro said leaning forward.
“That doesn’t even make sense! I’m already here!”
They stared at each other for a quiet minute. Kojiro relaxed his stance, his weight shifting from foot to foot. “What’s so important that you need to talk to me in-person anyways?” he responds gruffly.
Kaoru takes a step closer to Kojiro, closing the distance between then. “About us.” Kaoru says quietly. “About what happened between us.”
Kojiro’s jaw ticked. “There’s nothing to talk about.” He said between gritted teeth. “It’s over. It’s been over for years.”
Kaoru shakes his head. “It’s not over.” He says with conviction. “Not for me. Not for you. I know you feel it too Kojiro. I can see it in your eyes.”
There’s no denying the truth to him. He had spent years burying his feelings for Kaoru and he thought he finally succeeded. But here he was, standing in front of him, and all those feelings were rushing back to the surface, his mental shield was cracking.
Kojiro closed his eyes, trying to suppress the emotions surging up in his chest again. He had worked so damn hard to move on, to build a life with Kari; and now here comes Kaoru, threatening to upend everything once again.
He could feel Kaoru’s gaze on him, and it both warmed and infuriated him.
He opened his eyes to look at Kaoru. He had the sudden urge to be petty and tell pinky to fuck off, to leave him alone once and for all, just so he could get his revenge… but when he looks at Kaoru, he can’t.
“Not tonight.” He hears himself say instead. “I’ll meet you for breakfast. I have a whole room full of people I need to talk to first. You can wait.”
Kaoru nods in understanding. Kojiro needs to tend to his guests. “Alright,” he says quietly. “I’ll wait.”
He felt a mix of relief and anxiety at Kaoru’s agreement. Kaoru had never agreed with him on anything before, and he’s never been this… compliant. 'What happened to you, Kaoru?'
He knows that he needs to go back out to the party. To pretend that nothing was amiss, and his world hadn’t just been turned upside down.
He takes a deep breath, steeling himself for the masquerade. “See you in the morning, then.” He says curtly.
He strode to the door and paused, his hand on the knob. He couldn’t help himself and turned to look at Kaoru one last time over his shoulder.
He took in the sight of Kaoru, standing there in the middle of the room looking vulnerable and exposed. He felt the urge to go to him, to take him in his arms and never let go, but that was only a long-forgotten dream, and he had to face reality. He pushed down his feelings once again and closed the door behind him.
Kojiro steeled himself as he returned to the party, pasting on a smile and engaging in superficial conversation with his guests. He makes small talk and laughs at their jokes, pretending that his world was not crumbling beneath him. He needs a strong drink about now.
He catches glimpses of Kaoru throughout the night, watching as he stands in the corner, observing but not participating in the festivities. He's torn between wanting to go to him and wanting to keep his distance.
As the night went on, he catches Kaoru talking to Langa and Reki. His body language more open and engaging.
Kojiro is struck by how little Kaoru has changed over the years. Sure, he had a new haircut, and he was wearing pants instead of his kimono, but he still carried himself with the same effortless charm and grace.
Kojiro felt a pang of jealousy as he watched Kaoru interact with the other guests. His easy laughter and charming smile drawing them in. He couldn't help but wonder if Kaoru still had the ability to make them fall under his spell or if it was just him.
~!@!~
The next morning he finds Kaoru in his kitchen talking to Kari.
Kari is charmed by Kaoru. “He’s here to pick you up in his limo!” She sings out to Kojiro, excitedly. “I have to go to work, but you boys have fun!” She gives his arm a quick squeeze before grabbing her purse and heading out the door.
Kojiro glanced at Kaoru, a little taken aback by the arrangement. “We’re going somewhere?” He asked, his voice betraying a hint of suspicion.
Kaoru raised an eyebrow. “You said breakfast, you never gave me a time. You’re not going to wear your pajamas out in public, are you?” Kaoru asked.
Kojiro rolled his eyes. “You could have texted me.”
“You blocked my number.”
“You could have sent a carrier pigeon!” Kojiro replied sarcastically.
Kaoru rolled his eyes at his response. “Because carrier pigeons are such a reliable form of communication these days.” He says dryly.
Kojiro couldn’t help but smirk. “And yet, they’d be more reliable than you.”
“Oh, so that’s how we’re going to play it?” he says with a glint in his eye and a playful smile pulling at the corners of his mouth.
Kojiro felt the familiar thrill at Kaoru’s banter. He had missed this. He had almost forgotten how easy it was to fall into this routine. How effortless it was to match wits and to trade barbs.
“I’m just calling it like I see it,” Kojiro replied. A small smile tugging at his own lips. He’s still annoyed at the fact that Kaoru had just shown up announced, but he can’t deny the excitement that’s building in his chest at being in his presence again.
“So, you see me as someone who’s not reliable?” Kaoru teases, taking a step closer to Kojiro.
Kojiro holds his ground, refusing to back down. “That’s exactly right,” he says in mock seriousness.
Kaoru is close enough now that Kojiro can smell his cologne, a familiar scent that brings a rush of memories. He shakes off the nostalgia and tries to focus on the present moment.
Kaoru noticed the flicker of emotion and his own expression softens slightly. Their playful banter becoming more serious.
He looks away first, breaking the eye contact. Then he takes a step back from Kaoru as if he had a contagious disease. “I’m going to go get ready.”
Kaoru watches as Kojiro stalks out of the room, his gaze follows him until he disappears out of sight. He lets out a sigh and leans against the counter. He knows Kojiro is still angry with him. He’s hurt by the way things ended between them, but he also knows that there’s still a thread of connection between them. A spark that hasn’t faded despite the years apart.
Kaoru stands in the kitchen, waiting for Kojiro to return. He takes a deep breath and looks around. Kojiro’s new home was nicer than his last one. Nothing looked like it was threatening to fall apart atleast.
He glanced at the clock, noting that Kojiro was taking longer to get ready than he expected.
Finally, after what felt like an eternity, Kojiro returns to the kitchen dressed in a smart button-down shirt and dress clacks. He’s shaved and combed his hair, and Kaoru can’t help but notice how good he looks.
“You look a little too put together. Are you trying to impress me?” he taunts.
Kojiro rolled his eyes. “I don’t’ need to impress you. I’m just trying to look presentable for your fancy breakfast.”
Kaoru smirked, unable to resist poking his pride. “Oh, come on. Admit it, you dressed up for me.”
Kojiro glared at him, his arms crossed in defiance. “I did not,” He grumbled, his resolve weakening as Kaoru continued to smirk at him.
Kaoru takes a step closer to Kojiro, his expression playful. “Oh really? Then why did you put in all of this effort? Are you trying to look good for someone else?”
Kojiro huffs, trying to keep a straight face as Kaoru’s proximity sends a shiver down his spine. “I always dress nice.” He says defensively. “It’s called having standards.”
“Since when? Last I knew you hardly wore any shirts at all, nonetheless nice ones. Kari finally whipped you into shape.” Kaoru teased.
Kojiro bristled at his comment. “I’ve always had standards.” He insisted, even though he knows it’s a lie. “And you’re not any better, walking around in your designer suits and your perfect hair.”
Kaoru laughed at Kojiro’s response, his hand going to his much shorter hair. “Well, I can’t help it if I have a natural sense of style, unlike you, who used to look like a man whore all the time.”
“At least I didn’t feel the need to dress up like some kind of snob.”
Kaoru couldn’t help but laugh, amused by his stubbornness. “Oh please, you just didn’t want to put in the effort back then. Admit it, you were lazy.”
Kojiro gritted his teeth, his patience wearing thin. “And you were too high maintenance. Always worrying about appearances and never just relaxing.”
Kaoru grins at Kojiro’s retort, his competitive nature coming out again. “And yet, you still found me irresistible back in the day.” He said with a cocky smirk.
Kojiro’s face flushes red. The truth of his words only seemed to rattle him and frustrate him even more. “That's funny, coming from a guy who would always stop by my restaurant every other night to get a good look at me. That was a long time ago. People change, you know.”
Kaoru stepped closer to Kojiro, closing the distance between them. “Maybe. But some things never change.” He reached out and touched Kojiro’s cheek.
He swallowed hard, the touch of Kaoru’s hand on his skin sends a jolt of electricity through him. He tried to hide his reaction but fails miserably. His breathing becoming shallow as he stares into Kaoru’s eyes.
Kaoru studied his face, taking in the way his eyes have darkened with desire, and the way his lips part slightly. He could feel the energy crackling between them, the same electric current that had always drawn them together.
Kaoru slid his hand down to Kojiro’s neck. His long pale fingers traced a path along the sensitive skin beneath his jaw. Kojiro’s breath hitched at the touch, his body betraying him despite his best efforts.
Kaoru can see the conflict in Kojiro’s eyes again. The war between his anger and his desire. He smiles softly at Kojiro. His thumb brushing lightly along Kojiro’s bottom lip. “See? Still the same.”
Kojiro tried to hold onto the anger. He needed to cling to the hurt and the betrayal that he’s been nursing for the past five years, but it’s impossible with Kaoru touching him like this.
All he could feel was the raw, overwhelming need that had always been there between them.
Kaoru stepped even closer so his chest was pressing against his. He could feel the hard planes of Kaoru’s chest through his shirt. The rhythm of Kaoru’s breathing mirroring his own.
Kaoru’s lips were mere inches away from his. He could feel his breath hot against his skin. His resolve was crumbling like flour through a sifter.
Kaoru’s Carla bracelet interrupts them, but it wasn’t Carla’s voice but a male version. “It’s time to go or you’ll miss your reservation.” The bracelet glowing green.
“Thank you, Joe.” Kaoru replies to his A.I.
Kojiro squawked. “What happened to Carla? And why are you calling her Joe?!”
Kaoru looked at him with a guilty expression. “Ah, right. Well, I had to upgrade the system. Carla was getting outdated and couldn’t handle all of the new features I needed.”
Kojiro narrowed his eyes at Kaoru. “And why does your new A.I. have my nickname?” he asked crossing his arms.
Kaoru’s eyes flickered away, avoiding his gaze. “I just thought it would be a nice tribute to our old times.”
Kojiro raised an eyebrow at his explanation. “Right, because you’re all about nostalgia these days.” He says sarcastically.
Kaoru shoots him a glare. “Don’t act like you don’t miss it sometimes.” He says with a hint of a challenge.
“Do you even remember how to skate?” Kojiro barked out.
Kaoru bristled. “Of course I do, you pea-brain idiot. I may not skate as often anymore, but I can still shred with the best of them.”
“Yeah, I’ll believe it when I see it. You probably can’t even kickflip anymore.” Kojiro taunted.
Kaoru growled. “I can kickflip and grind better than you ever could!”
“You’re on Cupcake, but loser pays for lunch, and I get to pick the restaurant.”
“Oh, we’re having lunch together now? Might as well, since our breakfast plans have far since passed. I hope you’re ready to eat your words because I’m not going to hold back.”
Kojiro scoffed, “You’re on. I’ll show you that I’m still the best skater in this room.”
Kaoru’s confidence was sky-high. “I’m willing to bet you’ll be begging for mercy before the end of the night.”
“Oh princess, I don’t beg. Ever.” He knew he should have stepped back. He knew he should have put a stop to this before it went too far but he couldn’t.
All he could do was drown in the emotions he saw there, and he wasn’t even sure they were talking about skateboarding anymore.
He saw the way Kaoru righteously lifted his chin again.
He was about to say something snarky. Kojiro couldn’t help himself and kissed him. A desperate exasperated kiss. “You talk too much,” he murmured as he wrapped Kaoru up in his arms.
Kaoru gasped as he felt Kojiro’s lips on his, taken by surprise at the intensity.
He quickly recovered and kissed him back with just as much desperation.
Their bodies pressed together, their hands wandering, their breath coming in ragged gasps.
They were drowning in each other in the heat and the need that had been building for so long.
Kojiro’s had his hands tangled in his hair, as his hands roamed over Kojiro’s body.
They pulled apart for a moment as they stared into each other’s eyes, both trying to catch their breath.
Kojiro was a mix of frustration and lust, Kaoru’s was a mix of need and surrender; and then they kissed again.
Harder, more desperate. Their bodied moved against each other, seeking, taking, claiming.
They were like magnets, drawn irresistibly together after years of separation.
They stumbled backwards, still kissing, still holding onto each other. They hit the wall. Kojiro pinned Kaoru against it. Trapping him between the cool surface and his own large, muscled body.
Kaoru’s back arched as Kojiro’s mouth moved down his neck, kissing and biting at the sensitive skin there.
His hands roamed over Kaoru’s body, slipping under his shirt and lifting it over his head, feeling the heat and the hardness of his torso.
They were both shaking with need now, their bodies reacting to each other in ways they couldn’t control. Kojiro’s hands found the front of Kaoru’s slacks, fumbling with the button.
Kaoru let out a low moan, his head falling back against the wall. The button wasn’t coming undone. Kojiro kissed and nipped his way downward over Kaoru’s collarbone and down his chest to figure out that the button slid slideways.
Kaoru’s hands fisted in Kojiro’s hair, his breathing coming in ragged gasps.
Kojiro took his time, savoring every inch of skin that was exposed to him and enjoying tasting his body.
They were both past the point of no return now as he successfully slid Kaoru’s slacks down his hips. Kaoru kicked them off, his body arching against Kojiro’s, seeking more, always more.
Kojiro’s mouth found the sensitive skin of Kaoru’s hip, his teeth sinking in just enough to leave a mark. He heard Kaoru let out a strangled moan and felt his fingers digging into his shoulders.
Kojiro’s mental shield was officially down, and it was like a dam had burst. All of the pent-up emotion and desire he had flowed through him. Kojiro’s hands were everywhere, touching, exploring, taking. He had many talents, and this was one of his favorites.
Kaoru was putty in his hands. Boneless and pliant, giving in to the pleasure that roared through him.
He stood up, lifted his head, capturing Kaoru’s mouth in a hard, possessive kiss.
Kaoru kissed him back just as fiercely, their tongues dueling in a dance that was both familiar and yet new.
Kojiro pulled off his own clothes in seconds and lifted Kaoru, wrapping his legs around his hips.
Kaoru let out a surprised gasped, but he quickly adjusted, wrapping his arms around Kojiro’s neck and holding on tight.
They moved together in a rhythm that was both frantic and desperate. Kojiro’s grip was bruising as he pinned Kaoru against the wall, his body slamming into him in a way that was both brutal and tender.
Kaoru’s moans responded in kind with a mix of pain and pleasure. It was addicting. The sensations overwhelming him. His fingers digging into Kojiro’s back as he held on for dear life.
The friction between them was almost too much to bear, the heat and the sweat and the need building and building until it seemed like they would explode.
Kojiro’s breathing was ragged, his face buried in the crook of Kaoru’s neck, his body moving on pure instinct.
They were both on the brink of the edge now. Their bodied straining towards release. Kojiro’s hands slid down, stroking and caressing Kaoru in all of the right places. “Fuck… Kojiro. Don’t stop,” he whimpered.
Kaoru let his head fall back and his eyes squeezed shut as he rode the wave of sensations coursing through him. “Kojiro,” he moaned, his climax crashed over him in a wave as he shattered into a million pieces.
Kojiro loved hearing his name being praised and chased his own release, his body shaking.
They stood there, leaning against each other. Both of them panting and trembling from the intensity of their tryst.
In that moment, with their bodies still intertwined and their breaths still ragged, they were both finally and undeniably home.
A crash waved over Kojiro in anxiety. He let him down as his mood shifted to something darker. “I think you should go. You got what you wanted. Leave, and don’t come back.”
“What?! That’s not…” Kaoru looked lost for a moment and on the verge of tears. He turned his shock into anger. “Was that some sort of pity fuck, Kojiro? You think I just came back out here to get laid? I could have any guy out there. But I don’t want them, I want you.”
Kojiro shook his head slowly. “You can’t have everything you want, Kaoru; and you especially can’t walk in here and ruin my life because yours sucks. I’m getting married to Kari.”
“You think that’s all this was to me? Just some sort of one-time fling? You know me better than that.” He spat.
Kojiro shook his head.
Kaoru’s heart clenched. He knew Kojiro was right, but he couldn’t accept that, wouldn’t accept that. “So, what, you’re just going to marry someone else and act like what we had never mattered? Like I never mattered?”
Kojiro couldn’t look at him. His expression hardening. “Don’t put this on me. You’re the one who left, remember? You’re the one who chose a career over us.”
Kaoru’s eyes flashed with hurt and anger. “That’s not fair. You made your own choices too! You could have come with me.You could have chosen me, but you didn’t.”
Kojiro’s own anger flared as well. “I had responsibilities here, people who counted on me. A business to run. I couldn’t just up and leave like you.”
Kaoru’s hands clenched into fists at his sides. “And what about me? I was your responsibility too, but you let me go without a fight. How do you think that made me feel?”
Kojiro’s face twisted in frustration. “Jesus, Kaoru! You think I was just going to beg you to stay? To give up everything I had here? I tried, Kaoru. I tried to talk you out of it, to make you see reason, but you were hell bent on leaving because of your own greed. What do you think I wanted? For you to give up everything and be some domestic househusband? You’d be shit at that. I wanted you to stay, because I loved you.”
Kaoru felt like the air had been punched out of him. He had always known that Kojiro had loved him but hearing it now in the midst of their argument hit him in a way he wasn’t prepared for.
Kaoru scrambled to put his clothes back on. “We could still make this work,” he gritted out.
Kojiro watched as Kaoru dressed, his expression conflicted. He wanted to believe it was possible, but he wasn’t sure.
“How? You live hours away, in a bigger city, surrounded by fancy people. I’m just a small town guy, without a lot to offer you.”
Kaoru’s hands didn’t tremble as he buttoned up his shirt. “I don’t care about any of that. I care about you. We can make this work.” He said again. “We can visit each other on the weekends. I don’t need anything fancy.”
Kojiro dragged a hand through his hair. “I’m not having a long distant relationship with you. That’s not what I want.”
He watched as Kaoru missed a button. “I want someone to hold at night. I want a real relationship with someone who’s going to be here for me. Not a text message with sweet words. I want to see you when I wake up and kiss you anytime I want. I want you at my restaurant. I want so much more than a weekend.”
Kaoru felt his heart breaking at his words. He knew that Kojiro was right. That a long distant relationship would only make things more difficult, but he couldn’t just give up on them. “Then, I’ll quit my job. I’ll move here, I’ll work in your restaurant, anything.”
Kojiro’s eyes widened in surprise. “What? You can’t just quit your job and move here.” He protested.
Kaoru’s expression was determined as he stepped closer to Kojiro. “Why not?” he pressed. “You said you wanted me here, right? I can do anything. I can cook, wait tables, I can manage the place. I don’t care as long as I’m with you.”
“You cook now, huh?” Kojiro teased.
Kaoru blushed slightly, a small smile on his face. “I’ve picked up a lot of skills in my travels,” he admitted. “I can even make a decent omelette now, believe it or not.”
Kojiro felt torn. “Prove it. Move back home and then we’ll talk.”
Kaoru’s eyes widened at the challenge. He had expected a pushback, but he hadn’t expected to be asked to prove himself. “You want me to move back here first, before you’ll even consider us being together again?”
“I’m not breaking Kari’s heart for a guy with fake promises.”
Kaoru’s expression darkened. “You think I’m just going to walk away from you? You think I’m not serious about us?” Kaoru’s voice rose, his anger creeping in again.
“I’m being realistic, Kaoru. You’ve been gone for years, and now you want to waltz back into my life and expect everything to be the same? It’s not that simple.”
“I know that! I know I have a lot to make up for, I know I hurt you. But I also know that I still love you, and I want to be with you.”
“How would I know if you do move back here, that you won’t just get bored and leave again?”
“I won’t get bored. I was running away before. I was scared and didn’t know what I wanted. But I know what I want now, and it’s you Kojiro.”
Kojiro began to dress too. “Why me? You could have anyone you wanted. Why do you want me?”
Kaoru moved closer to him. “Because you’re you, and because you make me feel safe, and you’re always honest with me. You make me laugh, and you make me feel. Every time you touch me, it feels like coming home.”
Kojiro’s breath hitched as his words. His heart was racing in his chest. “Bullshit."
Kaoru growled in frustration and grabbed the front of Kojiro’s shirt, tugging him to him. “I could never get bored of you. You’re the one person I can’t get out of my head. The person I can’t seem to live without. I should have known that sooner. I’m sorry.”
“And what about Kari? I can’t just break off the engagement out of the blue. That’s not fair to her.”
“Tell her the truth. That you still have feelings for your ex and it’s not fair to keep her here.”
He knew he couldn’t string Kari along when his heart was still with Kaoru. “That’s easier said than done.” He muttered.
“It doesn’t have to be today. But you should let her know soon. I’m moving back to town Kojiro. I’ll find my own place. We can take this at your pace. Okay?” Kaoru says placing a hand on his chest.
Kojiro felt the warmth of Kaoru’s hand on his chest and his heart was leaping at the contact. He knew what he wanted. He wanted Kaoru back in his arms and in his bed, but he was still scared of getting hurt again.
“Okay,” he managed to say, blowing out a deep breath.
Kaoru kissed his cheek. “I’ll wait for you.” He said softly. “You just need to talk to Kari when you’re ready.”
Kojiro nodded, his mind spinning with everything that had just happened. He was facing the possibility of getting back together with the only guy he had ever loved. It was terrifying but thrilling at the same time.
He watched Kaoru straighten his clothes and headed out the side door.
Kojiro slumped against the wall. His heart still pounding in his chest and feeling like he’d just been run over by a truck. His emotions were a mess.
He thought about Kari and how he was supposed to break off their engagement without sounding like a total dick. He thought about Kaoru and his unexpected return.
He was so sure he was over Kaoru, but all it took was one moment together for those feelings to come rushing back, stronger than ever.
END