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The world closed and Gilded was gone- for a moment there was nothing but a faint awareness of the lack of sensation, the lack of anything.
Then they could see again, they were in a structure - the structure that had been in the sky, the one surrounded in barriers. Some part of their mind knew he had been there before but he couldn't find the memory among the few he had.
He was there now, though, behind him was the portal he couldn't remember walking out of. He was a couple paces away from it now. They sighed, gold had tried so hard to deny that he would be back, ignore the mentions of "next time", pretend he wouldn't have to be back, pretend he wouldn't have to learn from his errors and mistakes and fail to change his ways.
A large crowd of people were in the too small space and Gilded found himself searching for some space. He looked longingly at the portal, unable to go through it, but there - taunting him. When only a few people were left, he pushed down his upset, sulking wasn't productive. He looked to the button- hoping for any colour but red.
Sapphire that was good enough. Instinctively, he looked around for Sparrow, they had pressed the button long before him and had been put into red team, for a moment he hoped they were still near spawn and he would be able to find her easily. But it caught himself. If he was forced to stay here he better put some effort into changing his ways and if they're going to succeed in that, he needs to set himself some rules.
Number one is no attachments. He is not allowed to talk to Sparrow, and he is not allowed to depend on others. Everything he gets has to be gotten by his own hands or stolen, he wasn't going to leech off of others this time (and he sure wasn't about to help anyone either, screw his teammates. Old and new).
Number two was to humble himself. Last time he died twice due to his own ego, so that has to change. He is not immortal, he was in fact very killable, and he only knew one way to drill that idea through his dense skull. The first thing he did was begin mining dirt near to spawn. He built a pillar 23 blocks high, and jumped.
Having a death under his belt would help with the fear (he ignored his shaky hands as he respawned, ignored the way his legs begged to give out under his weight. He had a lot of walking to do, he could not collapse now), he would have to remind himself how mortal he truly was every time his ego grew too large, every time he progressed enough to feel safe-
Rule number three was he could not let himself feel safe. He must always be vigilant, he is not allowed to relax, no matter where he is. There is no safety here.
With three rules layed out in his mind he started walking, choosing to go west. He gathered some wood when he ran into a forest, killed some animals for food on the way. He knew eventually he would have to go mining, but that could wait for a little. It would find a place to build first, somewhere far. He swum through the oceans, not bothering to make a boat. Taking it slow as they knew the world was still young, taking note of interesting things flare came across on his travels.
He found a field of sunflowers, telling himself that he only took them because they're yellow and that's his favourite colour. Not because they remind him of... And when his inventory is full and he looks through for things he can throw out he pretends he doesn't see the bright yellow petals. Pretends that's the only reason he kept them on him the whole time (they pretend gold doesn't miss fern and they pretend they aren't going to keep those flowers in his pocket for as long as he can).
Eventually he finds a place, a small dip in the ground, far enough from the world border but not too close to spawn, he would not call it home. The cycles are too short for that. But it would be a base (he could distract himself from the ache in his chest by building something pretty, perhaps he might not feel like running back to spawn and finding Sparrow and just existing in her presence anymore. His closest, and only friend - how it misses them)
He sets up something small, a place to store his many items, a small farm to start him off. Then he makes his way into the mines. He would find distractions, things to busy his mind as it tries to will him back to Sparrow- stop thinking about him. It berates themself. Forcing themself to focus on the mobs and the cave and the blocks they were breaking (his hands are still shaky; his legs ache).
Glitch was determined to change. As of this point, he could not care for Sparrow.
He doesn't care. He doesn't.
The sunflowers don't leave his inventory