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shin can't fall asleep. it's around 2 am, but he just can't. he's been imagining this day for 3 years now. dreaming about how he meets saint again, how they make up and become best friends again. and he also imagined this—even though shin said his mom can't find out, he wanted saint to sneak in and spend the night with him, sleeping in his bed like in the good old times—saint's big body almost covering him from behind, his arms tight around shin's chest.
but shin is glad he isn't facing him. especially when he feels saint's soft, warm breath on the crown of his head and saint's hips pressing close from behind. shin is blushing again. if saint only knew, he'd already go tell chingching that.
thinking about that, shin feels small when they're this close. and also hot—the weather and the blanket they share aren't helping at all, and saint's arms only tighten the hold.
all of a sudden, he feels something. out of nowhere, when shin thought his best friend was sleeping, saint shifts, distancing his hips from shin.
"ai'saint..." shin mumbles quietly. "are you sleeping?"
"uhhh," saint murmurs, his low, sleepy voice doing things to shin's body. he feels tingles where his back is glued to saint's bigger chest.
"your arms are too tight." shin wants to add that he kinda likes it, especially the way they press his whole body into saint's. he thinks he could get lost in this feeling. "you make it hard to breathe," not that it's just saint's arms causing that.
saint doesn't respond. instead, he hides his face in shin's hair, slowly moving his arms lower to rest on shin's waist, firmly grabbing onto him with his hands. shin is amazed by how strong the grip feels but how soft the touch is. he knows saint won't hurt him, but he also knows he won't be able to move now, even if he tries. and suddenly, he misses the warmth of saint's hips pressing into him.
"better?" saint asks, his voice hot against shin's ear. shin feels his skin burning everywhere their bodies touch. and he wants to believe it's not just him.
"you..." shin says, absolutely breathless. "you feel it too, right?.."
"ai'shin..." saint's face is in shin's neck now, tickling it with every breath he takes and every word he says. "i fucking missed you..." he wants to add something absolutely crazy but holds back.
"you..." shin opens his mouth but doesn't say a word for a good minute. "you backed off. bring it back, i wanna feel your body. i wanna know every damn second that you're by my side."
"no, ai'shin," saint says too quickly. "don't... i can't. you know why."
shin's chin trembles. "i need it." no doubt, he damn well knows why saint can't do that. "i need to feel you. to know that you need me too."
saint swears into his neck, lips brushing against skin. his hands move under shin's shirt, squeezing his waist as he shifts his hips toward shin. and it feels like heaven—shin's eyes close, teeth sinking into his lower lip, as saint's fingers digging into hot, bare skin. he wants saint to do it again, to back off and press into him just to create some movement.
"wow," shin thinks to himself. all this time, he wasn't sure saint could even understand how he makes him feel. shin didn't know how to hide how needy he is for everything about saint.
now, feeling saint's hardness against his body, there's no doubt saint wants him too. in all the same ways.
saint hugs shin, one hand crossing his waist under his clothes to keep him still. he brings his other hand to shin's hip, squeezing it. "i need you," saint states louder and clearer than anything before. "i need you, ai'shin."
shin can feel his own cock getting harder in his pajama shorts. feeling saint's arm around his body, shin feels consumed by the touch. he wants more of saint. no, he needs more of saint.
"your hand... i want it skin to skin," shin asks, grateful saint can't see his face. he's pretty sure his cheeks are red, lips swollen from how he keeps biting them.
lips. he can still feel saint's lips on his neck—the closest to kisses on his body he's ever gotten. and they're the lips of the only person he's ever desired to kiss. every time they bicker, fight, or talk closely, every single time his gaze falls on saint's lips at least once. even now, he wonders how they taste, how they feel. is it sweet and magical like in movies and books? or is it hot and wet like that video of two guys kissing he watched last week? would saint kiss back, use his tongue, bite shin's lip? has saint ever even kissed someone? or is it even okay to ask a friend about that?
"how... skin to skin? what do you want me to do?" saint can imagine, but he's unsure if shin would ever really ask for that much.
"your hand on... you know. i want it under my clothes."
saint is stunned. he wants him to... what.
"are you blushing, ai'shin?" saint smiles into his neck and slides his hand under shin's shorts and underwear. he touches unsurely, feeling the muscles in shin's hips tense under his hand, making it more satisfying to touch. squeezing like before, but now with no barrier. "you're so soft," saint whispers, leaving a small kiss on shin's neck. "you feel so good."
"did you..." shin swallows. "do it before? kiss someone or touch like this?" shin wants to know if saint is doing this for the first time, just like him. he wants this intimacy to only be theirs. wants to be the only one to see saint lose his breath and feel this hard.
"only you. i only care about you. you turned me on just being next to me, shin." shin is satisfied with the answer enough to mumble "me too" and close his eyes to saint's touch. saint's hand tickles his hip before moving to his back—"you make me so hard, fuck," saint says, squeezing him from behind. he cups shin's soft skin and feels his own cock ache. he's so hard he needs release, and he's sure shin needs it too.
saint thinks of what he should do next. kiss shin? he'd love to. but he hesitates. a kiss would change so much between them. since shin had said they were just classmates, to now, when he can call him his best friend again, saint knows they need more time to take another step. they both want it, but it doesn't feel right yet.
what else does he do then? watching porn, saint always imagined shin—and more than that, what it'd feel like to be inside him. to thrust into his soft, petite body and make him make noises. but that's definitely a step for after they kiss, he can't do that now either.
does he ask shin to jerk him off? even though shin's small hands would look perfect on his cock—it's not about him right now. saint wants shin's body, wants it to be involved, to feel good. saint has thought about it so many times, and he's sure he can get off just knowing, seeing, and hearing shin feel pleasure.
then a crazy idea enters his mind. there's not a centimeter of shin's hips that saint hasn't touched yet. he knows shin is so needy, his cock leaking precum from overstimulation. and saint does what he's always wanted. he brings his hand to shin's mouth, pressing two of his fingers to shin's lips.
"take them inside. make my fingers wet if you want them on your dick," with the softest voice saint can talk to anyone. no more words needed—shin takes them with a wet sound, replaying saint's words in his head. hearing something so intimate from saint sends shivers through his body. saint's hardness pressing into him from behind and his fingers in his mouth—a dream come true for shin.
shin moves his tongue between the fingers, circles them, mumbles something with his mouth full, and saint wants to cum right fucking now from how hot it feels.
"touch me," shin mumbles again, pulling saint's fingers out with his own hand. "please," it sounds almost pathetic, and he pouts his lips, once again glad saint can't see it.
"you're so fucking hot," saint whispers by his ear. he lowers shin's clothes a bit and touches the head of his cock with his wet fingers, holding his breath to hear shin's reaction. and his imagination didn't lie—shin tries to hide his face in the pillow, feeling his saliva and precum mix as saint's thumb teases him, a quiet moan escaping his lips.
saint presses himself even closer, so close shin thinks he's somehow getting harder. saint strokes him slowly, enough to make shin move his hips, trying to make him go faster.
"you know, whenever i touch myself, i can't help but imagine you needy like this next to me," saint's warm breath tickles shin's neck. "i always wanted to jerk you off, to make you look like this for me," saint smirks, moving his hand faster.
"you're so hard," shin chokes on his moans, "i want you to feel me too."
saint strokes him a few more times, thinking about something he'd be too shy to imagine before.
"can i... please... just in-between your thighs?.." he already expects shin to say no when shin moves his hips up and down against his body.
"take my clothes off," shin says. instead of answering, saint carefully takes shin's shorts and underwear off in one smooth motion, lowering his own to his thighs and pulling off his shirt. shin is still wearing his own shirt, but he lifts it to his chest, exposing himself more to saint's gaze.
"fuck, i can’t believe you're real," saint brings both of his hands to shin's hips, his cock pressing against shin without anything in the way now. "i want you so bad, ai’shin."
"just do it," shin says, feeling a bit vulnerable being naked like this for the first time. but it's not just anyone—it's saint, his saint. the only one he can trust, the only one he wants to give all of himself to. "i wanna make you feel good... just fuck my thighs."
saint feels like dying when shin so casually drops the word fuck between them. he spits into his hand, quickly jerks himself a few times, and presses against shin's body.
"your body is so fucking beautiful," saint says, holding back the urge to kiss the whole of shin's skin and leave marks on his thighs. instead, he slowly slides between them, the feeling of shin's soft skin against his cock making him exhale with a moan. "you feel so good..." breathless.
shin is speechless. he can feel the entirety of saint moving back and forth between his legs, everything so wet, saint's hips slapping against him from behind. saint brings his fingers back to shin's cock, and shin swears he might collapse from everything he's feeling. he notes to himself that he likes the wetness down there and, for a moment, imagines how much better it'd feel for saint to be inside of him.
"i'm close," shin whines, his hips trembling with every thrust saint makes, jerking him off. "i'm so close... faster," and saint speeds up, feeling his own relief approaching.
"i'm gonna cum, ai'shin," saint says, his eyes closed.
"mhm, do i make you feel good, ai'saint?.. tell me," shin doesn't even try to hide his face anymore—not after showing saint this side of him. now he just wants to know saint feels as good as he does.
"yes... fuck, yes. your body feels better than i could ever imagine. so soft, so wet for me. i'm about to cum," and that's all shin needs to hear. he cums on saint's fingers, a loud moan escaping his mouth. saint keeps jerking him to make his pleasure last longer. shin's hips tense up, and he tightens his thighs around saint. just a moment later, shin feels cum all over his lower body, making him wetter, stickier. for a brief second, he thinks about tasting saint's cum and tells himself that next time he'll go down on him.
"ai'shin," saint murmurs, his mind foggy. "you were right... i'm falling for you." shin smiles, looking at saint over his shoulder. he wonders how messy they both look right now.
"i must be irresistible, huh?"