Chapter Text
"I hate humans," Hyunjin mutters, wrinkling his nose as the assorted smells of the bodies crammed into this one house meld together into one hideous stench to assault him.
"You don't have to like them, you just have to fuck them," Jeongin says, his tone only slightly annoyed.
It's not that Hyunjin wants to have this same tired argument every other day, but, "I don't want to fuck them either."
"Well, tough shit," says Jeongin, digging his nails into Hyunjin's wrist as he squeezes them down a hallway into the kitchen. "I'm not making your quota again. Just pick one, close your eyes, and think of Jesus."
"I don't think that's how the saying-"
"Suck it up, buttercup," Jeongin interrupts, letting Hyunjin go so suddenly Hyunjin stumbles. Jeongin forces a smile onto his face and pats Hyunjin's cheek. "Literally. And put that mouth to better use. I'm tired of your whining."
Hyunjin crosses his arms and tries not to shrink into himself. He hates humans. He hates fucking humans. But worse than that, he hates constantly disappointing his partner. "Sorry," he mumbles.
"Just get it over with quickly and we can go and get sweet buns. I saw a 24 hour convenience store on the way up here. Hm?" Jeongin brushes Hyunjin's hair out of his face, a rare show of affection from him, and Hyunjin relaxes an inch.
"Okay," he says. "Quickly. Got it."
-
It does not go quickly.
"Are you sure you're up for-"
"Mine doesn't need to be hard for you to fuck me," Hyunjin points out. He tries to sound reasonable. Sexy, even. And not like he's two seconds from shoving this one out a window and looking for a new target.
"Alright, alright," the guy says. "If a guy like you is offering, I'd be a fool to say no."
Hyunjin smiles. Maybe. Probably? He tries to, anyway. Luckily his ability to pretend like he's at all attracted to the human touching him gets a break when he's shoved into the pillows. Finally. There's gotta be a faster way to get to this point. A way that doesn't involve testing his dubious acting skills. With his face in the pillow and his eyes closed, he can think about whatever he wants. 'Think about Jesus.' "Not Jesus," Hyunjin mutters.
"Yeah, that feel good?" the dude says. Hyunjin had almost succeeded in forgetting about him.
"Feels great," Hyunjin says. "No talk. Only fuck."
"Don't be shy," the guy says. "Let me hear how much you like it."
Hyunjin grits his teeth. He was enjoying it, four seconds ago before dude with a death wish had to open his mouth. He tries ignoring him again, but dude won't shut up. It's just standard dirty talk, nothing special, but all Hyunjin can focus on is the annoying sound of his stupid voice and the ridiculous things he's saying.
"...and stuff you full of-"
"Shut up!" Hyunjin snaps.
"Ooh, kitty's feisty," dude says.
Hyunjin growls before he can stop himself. Fuck. His head pounds with the pressure of his horns trying to break free. He squeezes his hands into fists and concentrates, forcing them back as hard as he can. He's already been written up twice. He's not going to create more problems for Jeongin. He's not.
"Damn, you're tighter than a virgin," dude says. "Bet you like-"
"Shut UP!" Hyunjin bellows. Shit. That was his no-no voice. He's frozen for a second, breathing shakily, hoping against hope that he didn't fuck up but he knows it's too late. His skin is already tingling with energy as it pours from the human into him. A warmth blooms in his chest that shouldn't be there, but damn if it doesn't feel good.
Sighing, Hyunjin sits up and pushes the human off of him. The man- former man, current corpse- falls onto the bed and then slides off onto the floor. Hyunjin groans and rubs his face with a second, slightly louder sigh.
"I told you to shut up," he says to the corpse.
-
"I can't believe you," Jeongin says.
"Innie, I'm really sorry," Hyunjin says, hurrying to catch up as Jeongin strides down the street.
"We're gonna get court-marshalled," Jeongin says.
"We're not gonna get court-marshalled," Hyunjin says. "That's not even a thing. Just let me take the punishment this time, you can get a partner that doesn't suck and-"
"NO!"
Both of them stop. Jeongin turns around. He's breathing heavily, and there's- are those tears in his eyes? Hyunjin immediately tries to go to him, pitifully and desperately sorry, but Jeongin shoves him away. "I'm not getting reassigned," Jeongin says.
"Okay, I'm sorry, I know I'm the worst, I'm really sorry and you should really let them put you with someone else, Innie, I'm just going to drag you down with me." By the end of this speech Hyunjin's voice is so choked with tears it sounds like he has a human cold.
"Then we'll go down," Jeongin says, wiping his eyes aggressively on his sleeves. "Come on. We've wasted enough time on this dump anyway." He grabs Hyunjin by the hand- the hand this time, not the wrist- and Hyunjin falls into step with him with one last sniffle.
"I love you," he says.
"I know," says Jeongin.
-
"You're going back," says the arbitrator.
"We're going back?" Jeongin and Hyunjin parrot dumbly.
"The human you offed was due to get hit by a car tomorrow anyway. Barely a whoopsie with the reaper department, easily smoothed over, nothing to worry about. However," he says the last word slightly louder, as if he could tell Hyunjin had been about to relax and wanted to make sure he never got the chance. "Given that this is your third infraction in less than a single calendar year, we're demoting you both and reassigning you to a college campus."
"College?" Jeongin squawks. He clears his throat at a look from the arbitrator. "Sorry, sir. Yes, sir."
"I'm reducing your quota by half. If you perform well and refrain from causing any more incidents," he gives Hyunjin the barest glance; a you fucked up and you're barely worth my time in one, "we can talk about increasing it from there. Behave, both of you."
Out of the office, Jeongin lets out a loud breath. "By half, Hyunjin. We're going to be peasants."
"It won't be so bad," Hyunjin says, slinging an arm around Jeongin's shoulders. When Jeongin allows it, he can't resist also giving him a little kiss on the cheek. Jeongin groans and elbows him. Hyunjin yelps but doesn't let go, and they scuffle like children- like they used to, before Hyunjin realized he was broken and Jeongin got tired of dealing with him- all the way home.
-
"They split our quotas," Hyunjin says, blankly. They'd also confiscated the half-digested soul he'd reaped, but that was to be expected.
"They put me down for math, I hate math," Jeongin says.
And okay, it wasn't like Jeongin had been covering Hyunjin's entire quota, but it wouldn't be far from the truth to say Jeongin had been doing the lion's share of the work. Now... Hyunjin is on his own.
When Hyunjin stays quiet, Jeongin lowers his class schedule and shoots him a glance. "It's not more than you'd been doing before though, is it? Since they cut our quota by half anyway."
"I guess," Hyunjin says, moodily. A split quota means no wiggle room. No grace. If Jeongin does overtime just for fun it will go to waste and Hyunjin will still be struggling to make the bare minimum.
"Look," says Jeongin. "Think of this as a new opportunity. We don't usually get stuck in one place like this. And I know we're not supposed to fraternize with the cattle, but I won't tell on you if it's easier for you to just pick one and stick with them."
"You mean, date a human?"
"If you want to be gross about it."
Hyunjin rubs his chin thoughtfully while Jeongin goes back to his schedule. Hyunjin, date a human? The initial thought makes him want to barf. But... it's worth a try, at least. Anything is better than the way he's been going on.
"Eurgh, I have Biology at 8am, what kind of monster designed this schedule?" Jeongin gripes.
-
"I never should have listened to you," Hyunjin declares, dramatically throwing himself onto his standard issue twin bed.
"Huh?" says Jeongin, who'd been working slowly through his math homework.
"Dating a human. Now I'm empty and sad."
Jeongin looks up, eyebrows raised. "It's only been a week. You tried and failed to date a human already?"
"Whatever," says Hyunjin, rolling over to face the wall. "You wouldn't understand."
Jeongin snorts. "You're right about that. I've already hit my quota for this week and next week. Although, the cute werewolf I bagged from my math class still refused to do my math work for me. I think I'm losing my touch."
"Changbin's good at math too," Hyunjin mutters.
"Who?"
"No one."
Only the cute human who broke Hyunjin's heart.
Okay, maybe that's not fair. It's not Changbin's fault he's a gentleman. But Hyunjin's going to blame him anyway because it's the only way to stop himself from leaping headfirst into a pit of despair.
It had started well enough. He met Changbin on the first day in lecture--
"I'm Changbin," he'd said, sitting down with his hand out for Hyunjin to shake. "And you're beautiful."
Hyunjin laughed to cover up the fact that he was blushing a little bit. Changbin was cute, and forward. That made Hyunjin's job a lot easier. And that's all this was- a job.
But Changbin was easy to talk to. He flirted constantly, but in a way that was charming, not aggressive. After several days of hanging out during lunch, Changbin invited Hyunjin to dinner at his place- he was a senior, so he had a whole suite he shared with another senior who was, conveniently, not in that night. One thing led to another and soon Changbin was leaning across the couch to kiss him.
It was a good kiss. He can say that objectively now. At the time, he'd felt a little like a deer in the headlights. How was one supposed to act when someone they liked a little bit was kissing them? Hyunjin had never been in this position before. But Changbin was gentle and kissed him slowly, one hand on his jaw keeping him in place, stopping him from falling out of his skin.
But as soon as Changbin's hands got a little too adventurous, Hyunjin felt his familiar panic set in. The real problem, though, was that Changbin could too.
"Sorry," said Changbin, sitting back. "I got a little carried away. Do you want dessert?"
"...Okay," Hyunjin said.
And that was that. What was Hyunjin supposed to say? 'Hi, I don't like sex but I need you to do it to me anyway'?
Groaning, Hyunjin grabs his pillow and shoves it over his head. This is hopeless. He's the worst incubus there's ever been and he's miserable and it's never going to get any better and everything is pointless.
"Do you want to ditch our homework and get Insomnia Cookies with me?" Jeongin asks.
"...Okay."
Maybe there's one point. Two, if he includes cookies.
-
Hyunjin hates parties. They're loud, smelly, and full of humans. Yet here he is, once again, squeezing himself between sweaty bodies so he can drink some cheap alcohol and find some loser with low standards to fuck.
Yippee.
At least there's free booze. His ability to get drunk is the one shining light in his entire miserable existence. With a full cup in his hand and his butt sunk so deep into this chair he'll probably never get up, he can almost pretend his life doesn't suck.
He's halfway through the cup when he notices Him. The most beautiful boy he's ever seen. Hyunjin blinks, already feeling a little slow and buzzy from the alcohol. Maybe he's hallucinating. Maybe he blinked and woke up in a world where he doesn't hate everyone and everything.
He blinks again and the boy is still there, on the dancefloor, doing some sort of shuffle involving fancy footwork while drunk people hoot and holler at him. Hyunjin can't even pay attention to his footwork, his gaze drawn to the rest of him, his stunningly beautiful face, his bare chest. Hyunjin's seen more than his fair share of bare chests and never gave a shit but he gives one now.
The boy is wearing a long black kilt, a black leather vest, no shirt underneath, and sparkly makeup all over his face. His chest glistens with sweat and sparkles too. When he moves just right Hyunjin can see his nipples and it sends a shock through his body each time. Under the light he looks almost wet. Hyunjin can't look away, hypnotized by the way his body moves, by the way Hyunjin wants to touch him, see if his skin is as smooth as it looks, if he tastes like sin or like heaven. Or if the blasphemy of his existence wiped them both out.
His hair is long and platinum blond, tied up in a ponytail with braids going along the sides of his head. He's prettier than any girl Hyunjin's ever seen, with his delicate, doll-like features, but undeniably masculine too; his abs are absolutely stacked and though he's small and slender, his arm muscles are clearly visible too. He's like if a man and a woman had a baby. He's like if the most masculine man and the most feminine woman fused in a cosmic event and created him.
He's like pure sex.
He's like what every incubus wishes it was.
Hyunjin just stares. He's hot in the face and there's a squirmy feeling in his gut. He feels almost... aroused. Is this it? Is this what being attracted to someone feels like? Holy shit.
He loses sight of the beautiful boy for a while. It's okay, though, because he needs the break. Holy fuck. He sips his unnamed cocktail like it's the last lifeboat and he's drowning. Is he on drugs? Maybe this thing is spiked with more than tequila.
He's about to swallow his last gulp when the deepest voice from the darkest cave of Hell says, "Hey, gorgeous. Are you going to stare at me all night or are you going to come dance?"
It's him.
Hyunjin chokes spectacularly, spitting alcohol all over himself and Cosmic Hottie. Hottie only laughs.
"Fuck," Hyunjin croaks. "I'm so sorry-"
"You can make it up to me by dancing with me," Hottie says, holding a hand out, already swaying a little bit, biting his lip and smiling and staring straight into Hyunjin's fucking soul.
"I, uh, ohmygod," Hyunjin says. Is he hyperventilating? "I don't dance." Fuck, shit, fuck.
"It's easy," the absolute image of Sin says, taking the cup out of Hyunjin's unresisting hand and pulling him up off the chair. Hyunjin almost falls right back down except there's a strong arm around his waist and a cute laugh in his ear. "Careful."
"Fuck," Hyunjin mutters. Hottie is small and he smells so good, like vanilla and sex, like sweetness and desperation, like the secret to life itself and Hyunjin wants to breathe him into his lungs until he suffocates.
It's probably obvious that Hyunjin is smelling him and he can barely stand up straight but the boy just grins up at him, holding him up and guiding him in a dance that's mostly just them breathing on each other but god if it's not the single hottest moment of Hyunjin's life.
His feet come back under his control at some point and he tries to dance a little better, but it's impossible to concentrate on anything but Him. So he stops trying, and suddenly it's easy, like Hyunjin had been waiting all his life for the right god to follow and here He is.
They dance for what feels like hours but probably isn't; it's probably years. Suddenly the boy has turned his back to Hyunjin's front, the heat of his body burning Hyunjin everywhere but especially in one place in particular.
The fact that he's hard right now blows his mind almost as much as the fact that the single hottest entity in all the nine realms is grinding on him at a college party.
Hottie turns around again, hands sliding up Hyunjin's chest, and bites his lip at him. Hyunjin's dick honest to god twitches. Hottie tilts his face up, as if asking for a kiss. Is he asking for a kiss?? He'd better be, because Hyunjin's swaying forward and falling onto his lips before he can think to stop himself.
God, it's good. Has a kiss ever been this good before? Hyunjin would probably fall down except strong arms are holding him up again, and it's so warm, and his lips are so soft, and his tongue is so wet and god that's hot.
Sometime between then and being led by the hand off the dance floor, Hyunjin learns his name: Felix. Felix. He's never heard of anyone called Felix and that's perfect; no one else should be called Felix.
Felix leads him to a dark room and flicks on the light. It's an empty sitting room. Hyunjin has barely a second to look around while Felix locks the door because as soon as the lock clicks into place Hyunjin is moving, propelled by two small hands on his chest.
Hyunjin's back hits the couch, hard, but he barely even feels it because a second later Felix is in his lap and kissing him like his life depends on it. Hyunjin feels like he's being devoured; like he's being unmade; and all of him helpless to stop it. His hands hang limp at his sides, utterly useless as Felix touches him like he's the only one who can, the only one who knows how, and he's so right and Hyunjin is so lost, drowning in him, his beautiful lips swollen from Hyunjin's kisses, his tongue the sweetest invader Hyunjin's ever tasted.
After fifty years but also far too soon Felix releases his mouth with a gasp to tug down the collar of his shirt and kiss his neck, drawing goosebumps all along Hyunjin's skin. Hyunjin remembers he has hands at some point and cautiously puts them on Felix, not really sure what he's doing and a little afraid to touch him, like Felix might actually be made of fire, or divine energy, and Hyunjin might burn himself.
But Felix's body is warm and solid under Hyunjin's hands and it doesn't hurt at all to touch him. In fact once he's started, Hyunjin's can't stop running his hands all over Felix's sides, his thighs, his back, anywhere he can reach. He's small but muscular and he feels strong, feels powerful, his thighs tensing and relaxing under Hyunjin's hands as he grinds down on him.
Felix's hands have been all over Hyunjin, too, roaming over his chest, squeezing his arms. He tilts his hips back suddenly to reach between them, and that's his hand rubbing over Hyunjin's dick through his pants.
"Can I?" Felix asks, his lips just centimeters from Hyunjin's. "Can I ride you?"
Hyunjin blacks out, or almost; he makes some sort of choked wheezing noise, which he wishes he could have blacked out.
"Yeah," he whispers, because that's all he can get out.
Felix surges forward and kisses him again and Hyunjin moans, his hands on Felix's tiny waist and Felix's in his hair. Then Felix is sliding his hands down Hyunjin's body again, biting gently at Hyunjin's lip as he unzips his jeans and tugs him free.
Hyunjin barely has time to think holy shit, he's touching my dick before Felix is sitting on it. Hyunjin makes a truly undignified noise but thankfully Felix is moaning too so maybe he didn't hear it over the sound of Hyunjin's brain exploding. He hadn't even noticed Felix take off his underwear; unless he wasn't wearing any?? His kilt is still on; both of them are almost completely dressed. If someone were to come in and see them, they wouldn't even know that Hyunjin's dick was inside Felix's body, holy shit.
Felix barely gives Hyunjin time for his brain to catch up to his dick before he's putting him through his paces and riding him hard. Felix rides like he has a license; Felix rides like he's a bullfighter and Hyunjin's his trick pony; Felix rides like the world is crumbling all around him and he doesn't give a fuck.
"Holy shit, fuck," Hyunjin says. He says a lot of other profanity too. Mostly he's hanging on for dear life.
"Yeah," says Felix, his voice a little distracted, but he smirks a little too and that brief flash of his canine makes Hyunjin wonder if he could be a vampire and if so, what Hyunjin would have to do to get bitten by him. Is that a weird thing to think about? He doesn't even get a chance to answer his own question because Felix lets out this throaty groan that permantly restructures Hyunjin's entire brain.
Felix isn't the god of sex, he's an angel of death, and this is how he takes Hyunjin.
"God," Hyunjin gasps.
"Yeah," Felix moans.
Felix's little noises start going higher in pitch and he starts going faster, his nails digging into Hyunjin's shoulders, his little cries gaining in urgency, the way he's looking at Hyunjin like he's worried about something, like it's coming up too fast and he's scared, scared he won't get there, scared it will hurt, and Hyunjin can only stare back at him, utterly mesmerized, as Felix gasps suddenly and lets out the absolute sweetest little moan, his hips stuttering as hot wetness hits Hyunjin's lower belly. Hyunjin groans, completely caught up in Felix, in his eyes, in his body still moving so sweetly against him, in the way he moans softly in satisfaction.
"Please," Hyunjin says, not sure what he's even asking for, but Felix seems to know. His lips crash down on Hyunjin's again, both of them moaning as he picks the pace back up. Hyunjin has barely enough time to gasp into Felix's mouth before he's coming, so hard he really does black out for a second. Felix rides him through it, and kisses him gently, and Hyunjin feels so high he doesn't think he's ever coming back.
Finally Felix slows and then stops, and leans his head down against Hyunjin's, panting hot air against his neck. They sit there a long time, arms around each other as their heartbeats slowly come back down to earth.
Felix is the first to stir, slowly pushing himself up and then gingerly climbing out of Hyunjin's lap. He collapses onto the couch next to Hyunjin.
A little dazed and not quite sure his fingers are real, Hyunjin slowly tucks himself back into his pants and zips them back up. Except for the mess on his shirt they might just look like they'd, what, lost a fight with a wild animal?
"Damn," Felix says, still sounding a little winded. "That was good."
"Yeah," Hyunjin says, only his voice cracks in the middle. He clears his throat. "Good," he repeats, dumbly.
Good.
God.
Felix laughs a little breathlessly and stands up. Hyunjin feels tired just looking at him. "Maybe I'll see you around?" says Felix.
"Oh," says Hyunjin. "Yeah, definitely."
Felix glances back at him when he gets to the door, and smiles.
Then he's gone.
-
Jeongin looks up when Hyunjin collapses face-first onto his bed and doesn't move.
Holy shit.
"What happened to y-"
Hyunjin sits up abruptly. "I didn't get his number."
"Whose?"
Hyunjin gapes at Jeongin like a fish. Hyunjin's entire world just got punted into the stratosphere and Jeongin's here doing his homework and texting boys like nothing happened. Hyunjin doesn't even know where to begin explaining what just happened to him, so, "Felix," is all he says, in a pathetic little whine.
"Felix?" Jeongin scoffs. "That slut? Tell me you didn't just hook up with a succubus."
Hyunjin blanks. "A what?"
"Blond, freckles, looks like a blow-up doll, about yea high?" Jeongin holds his hand up insultingly low.
"Tell me you didn't just call the love of my life a blow-up doll."
Jeongin rolls his eyes. "I can't believe I have to tell you this, but you, my friend," here he leans across the way to clap a hand on Hyunjin's shoulder, "got played."
Hyunjin still feels a few hundred leagues behind this conversation, but the urge to defend Felix's honor rises up in him. "How did I get played if it was just a hookup? He might not have known what I was either."
Jeongin sits back and shakes his head. "Trust me, he knew. He's in my seminar class and he won't keep his stinky paws off my werewolf."
Hyunjin blinks. "I thought your werewolf was in math."
"There's two of them and they're both mine, okay? But Chan's always so smiley around Felix and it makes me sick." Here he crushes the page he was working on in his fist.
"Uh-huh," says Hyunjin. "How do you know he's a succubus? Have you considered that he's just ridiculously hot."
Jeongin scoffs. "He is not hot, he's stupid, and you're stupid too for fucking him."
Hyunjin snorts a laugh, leaning back against his wall as his adrenaline settles. "What do you have against succubi, anyway? Aren't they like, our sister devils or something? (I thought they were female?)"
"Hyunjin, did you spend a single second paying attention in school?"
"Honestly? No."
Sighing, Jeongin smoothes his paper back out and clicks his pen. "We're like, mortal enemies, you know? Or, rivals, I guess is more accurate. And there are male succubi, just as there are female incubi."
"There are?"
Jeongin stares at him. Hyunjin tries to picture his old schoolroom in his head, and he does recall several women. In fact- "Yeji literally threw you a surprise birthday party our last year, did you seriously forget-"
"No, no, I remember now," Hyunjin says.
Jeongin pinches the bridge of his nose like he has a headache. "Anyway, you being a moron aside, just stay away from him, okay? Succubi are bad news. Whatever he's got planned for you can't be worth a lousy fuck."
Hyunjin bites his lip. "Jeongin, he literally just rocked my entire universe."
Jeongin puts his pen down and frowns at him. Hyunjin holds his hands up in surrender and/or self defense, but Jeongin only says, "Just be careful with him, okay? His partner is really scary. Lee Minho. Have you met him? There's already rumors that he stabbed a guy."
"Probably deserved it," Hyunjin mutters, thinking of his own bounty of lovely encounters with men. But Jeongin picks up his pen in a markedly threatening way so Hyunjin yelps out, "Sorry!" and pulls his laptop onto his bed like a good student. They both return to their homework- well, Jeongin returns to his homework. Hyunjin pulls up instagram, locates Felix, and proceeds to click 'like' on all of his posts.
What Jeongin doesn't know won't hurt him.
-x-
hyunjinnn liked your posts.
Felix smirks down at his phone. "Cute."