Work Text:
In the living room of the Parker-Nichols house, Drake had a pillow hugged tightly to his chest as he sat on the couch and read some of the smuttiest shit he’d ever seen in his life. Josh suggested Drake try reading the books he got his sex ideas from, and the first one he gave Drake was called Behind the Stables about England a long time ago. He didn’t really care about all the decorum stuff and balls, but the writer could force him to see an image in his mind as if he was actually there in the room watching Viscount Belmont have sex with his horse groomer Jacob in the gardening shed. It was better than any porno he’d ever found on the internet, and in the last chapter, there was a threesome with the twink gardener. Porn had never been detailed about what it felt like to push into someone, or that there had to be stretching to even do that. There were so many things that online videos left out of the actual process.
“D-don’t tease me,” Jacob moaned. “It’s unfair.”
Henry ran his hand down his lover’s spine, not stopping his thrusts. “You’re insatiable.”
“Drake?” His mom asked.
Drake nearly screamed at being caught and threw the book on the floor to hide the evidence. “What?”
His Mom had a laundry basket in her arms as she looked down at him. “Were you reading a book?”
“No. I don’t read books.” A bad excuse, but that was the best he could come up with.
“Then what did you just throw on the floor?”
“A brochure for Miami. Just thinking about where we could go for a family vacation this summer.”
Mom didn’t buy it and leaned over to look at the floor. “Brochures for Miami have a handsome duke on the cover?”
Drake panicked; he was not ready to come out to his Mom yet, and a book about two guys having sex would definitely make her think he was gay, or at the very least curious. He chose to abort mission by grabbing the book off the floor and sprinting as fast as he could upstairs. He was nowhere near ready to talk about how he was gay, and nowhere near ready to admit that he was dating Josh. Avoiding everything was better, he could do that for as long as he had to.
In Drake’s defense, it was 100% Josh’s idea that he try reading the books he mentioned during the blackout. Josh thought that by Drake actually reading the spicy romance novels, his essays and creative writing assignments would improve in quality because he read what proper formatting looked like. He’d handed his boyfriend a book called Behind the Stables that took place in Regency Era England two hours ago and hadn’t seen Drake since. Josh actually liked the political drama of a viscount falling in love with a stable hand, but that was just his personal preference. He’d always had a fascination for historical fiction.
He was answering a question for his Miss Nancy column when Drake ran upstairs and slammed the door behind him. Josh turned to see him absolutely panicked with his back against the door and the book in his hand.
“You almost got caught with the book, didn’t you?” Josh asked.
“Yeah,” Drake said with a nod and he climbed onto his loft. “And, no offense to the stuff you’re into, Josh, but some of the sex-stuff in this book is stuff I’ll do when I’m, like, 40, not now.”
Drake got comfortable on his bed, laid down on his back, and opened the book back up. Josh didn’t remember saying he wanted to do the things in the book when he lent it to Drake. He’d said during the blackout that reading sexy books had helped him out with being intimate with Drake, and that he really enjoyed the books as a way to pass time. Josh quickly sent out the final draft for his Miss Nancy column, and climbed onto Drake’s loft where he sat on the end of his boyfriend’s bed.
“Drake, do you think that book is some kind of list of expectations of what I want both of us to do?” Josh asked simply.
Drake partially shut the book to look at him. “Isn’t it?”
Josh scoffed. “No, of course not. Like you said, some of the things in Behind the Stables are way too intense for either of us to try out. I just wanted you to read something you might enjoy outside of what Mrs. Hayfer assigns in class.”
“Oh, thank god,” Drake visibly relaxed. “Because I am so not ready to have a threesome with anyone.”
That surprised a laugh out of Josh. “Me neither.”
“But I can see where you got that one squeeze thing from in chapter five. I’ll have to send this writer a thank-you card for that.”
“Actually, I got that from a different book. But finish this one before you start the next one.”
Josh was glad they could have these conversations openly. Once they got over the weirdness of talking about what they liked and didn’t like after the first time they were intimate, it was a lot easier to discuss their expectations openly. He hoped that one day he could go all the way with Drake, but that was something for the distant future. For now, he’d let his boyfriend read the books and hopefully, his writing would improve on assignments because of it.
***
As much as he enjoyed work, Josh was more than ready to end his shift. He had a long day, a Thursday shift when usually he worked weekends so he could take Drake out on a date Sunday, and he wanted nothing more than to face-plant into his bed. Helen was in some kind of mood to make sure everything was better than perfect, which in turn put a lot of pressure on Josh - he theorized that they were under inspection or something to cause that mood. Maybe he could convince Drake to sleep in his bed that night for some cuddling, that would make him feel better. And speaking of Drake, he walked into the theatre while Josh was busy wiping down some containers.
“Hey, babe,” his boyfriend greeted.
“Hey, I thought you were at home for band practice?” Josh asked with a smile.
“We got done early, so I figured I’d walk you home.”
Josh checked his watch. “I still have fifteen minutes left, not long enough for a movie.”
Drake shrugged. “I’ll figure something out.”
While Josh leaned down to put away the food containers, he saw Drake try to lean over the counter to grab some candy. In an instant, Josh smacked his hand away to protect his integrity. Drake didn’t normally try stuff like that anymore, but they both knew Helen still had a soft spot for him despite Drake not having worked at the Premier for months. Josh wanted to maintain his image of a model employee regardless of what his boss thought of his boyfriend.
“No free candy,” Josh declared.
Drake got that sultry look in his eye when he actually flirted for real. “It wouldn’t be free if I gave you something in exchange.”
Josh stayed strong. “The US dollar either in coin, bill, or card form.”
Drake leaned over so that he was in Josh’s personal space. “What about trying one of the things in Behind the Stables when we get home? Something… messy?”
Immediately, several scenarios that were covered in the book flashed to Josh’s mind and he froze up. Lord above help him, he never should have let Drake borrow his book. He had the perfect ammunition to make Josh go into temporary shutdown. However, Josh persevered and smacked Drake’s hand again. He had a theory that because of the number of times Drake attempted this tactic, the prolonged exposure to Drake’s flirting was slowly giving him an immunity to it. Josh enjoyed it all the same, it just didn’t always end in a system reboot.
“This ain’t a romance novel,” Josh declared. “Fifty cents.”
Drake rolled his eyes, but took out his wallet and pulled a dollar out of it. “My last dollar for the week.”
Josh took the dollar gladly. “Maybe you should’ve kept your job.” He paid Drake his change and handed him a candy bar.
Drake wouldn’t actually go through with the offer, but he was kind of annoyed that he had to pay for the candy bar when his boyfriend was working the counter. Wasn’t working at the theatre supposed to give employees special privileges? He definitely remembered he had a ton of them as assistant manager. Speaking of working at the theatre, Helen walked up with her clipboard and noticed him immediately.
“Drake Parker,” she said with a smile.
“Hey, Helen,” Drake said. “What’s been up?”
“Oh, there is something big happening here this weekend.”
Josh leaned over the counter in interest. “Ooh! What?”
Helen briefly turned away from Drake to talk to Josh. “Sorry, I can’t tell you. Top secret, hush-hush business. Gotta keep it on the down-low.” She became super excited when she turned back. “We are having a real Hollywood premier right here in this theatre!”
“A Hollywood premier?” Drake asked.
“For what movie?” Josh asked.
“I told you it’s a secret!” Helen snapped.
Sometimes the favoritism Helen had for Drake was just really shitty, and Drake had become a master at redirecting it for his boyfriend’s benefit despite not working there anymore. He walked up to the concessions counter and leaned against it while he opened his candy bar so Josh could also be part of the conversation. It only seemed fair since Josh worked at the place that’d be holding the movie premier.
“It’s for that new Ashley Blake movie!” Helen gushed.
“Ashley Blake!?” Josh looked ready to explode. “I love that girl! She’s gonna be here?”
“M-hm, for the premiere. And for a big photoshoot tomorrow afternoon!”
It wasn’t everyday Josh got to meet someone famous. There was that time with Devon Malone, but he was no Ashley Blake, A-list child actress. He’d seen all of her movies a dozen times over with Megan. It was the one thing they actually shared that didn’t involve pain or humiliation. Maybe he could even get a signed picture for Megan, that could make her back off for a week at least.
“I can’t believe I’m gonna meet a real movie star! Pinch me!” Josh said to Drake.
Drake curled his lip. “I’m not pinching any part of you.”
Josh turned to his manager. “Helen, can I please help out with the premier? Please?”
Helen rolled her eyes. “I don’t care. It’s on Sunday.”
“Awesome!”
“Wait, isn’t the premiere when we’re going on a date?” Drake asked.
“I’ll make it up to you,” Josh answered. “How’s an autograph sound?”
“Lame unless I can sell it.”
Helen put a hand on Josh’s shoulder. “But listen.” She suddenly grabbed him by the vest and pulled him down to her eye level, the scariest expression on her face. “This is the biggest thing to happen to me in my life since I played Put-Put with D’eon Warrick. So, if you mess this up, I will thump you like a melon. You follow me?”
“Yes ma’am,” Josh whimpered. “Like a melon.”
She pushed him back up and walked toward her office like she hadn’t just threatened his skull. Despite Josh being twice her size, Helen could be terrifying when she wanted to be. The Ashley Blake premiere at least explained why she was on edge while Josh had been on shift. Tomorrow was Friday, a day Josh would’ve worked anyway, but he’d put 110% in so that he could make everything perfect. He truly would figure out a way to make it up to Drake, the extra money he’d get from working on a Thursday had to be worth something.
“You’re gonna meet a movie star,” Drake said. “How’s it feel?”
“Like I’m not worthy of the honor, but I’m taking it anyway.”
***
Drake wasn’t exactly happy to be taking Megan to meet Ashley Blake, but she wouldn’t shut up until he did and Drake didn’t have any plans after school. He walked her all the way from the house to the theatre where several trucks were parked around the back and people were moving in and out. It was clear Helen was going to pull out all the stops for the supposed “blonde Annie” of kid’s movies. It wasn’t like Drake had never heard of her, everyone had seen Ashley Blake’s face at some point whether in a movie, commercial, tv interview, or the tabloids at the grocery store. Not to mention there were times where Megan had her movies on repeat in the living room.
As soon as they crossed the street, Megan sprinted for the doors and Drake had no choice but to run after her. Mom would kill him if Megan got hurt because she got run over by a forklift.
“Megan, slow down!” Drake called after her.
It was like she was a guided missile or something, she dodged around the workers and delivery people like a pro in order to meet Ashley Blake. Drake tried to keep up, and barely stayed with his sister when they finally got to the lobby of the Premier. All of the posters were replaced with the poster for Ashley Blake’s new movie, the layout of the lobby was actively being moved by employees in red vests, and Josh looked shocked to see them there.
“Where is she!?” Megan asked as she looked around.
“You guys!” Josh scolded. “This is a closed photoshoot, what’re you doing here?”
Drake wordlessly shrugged at Megan.
“Meeting Ashley Blake,” Megan answered. “I love her!”
“I love her more!” Josh countered a little too quickly.
“A-hem,” Drake cut in, giving his boyfriend a look.
Josh rolled his eyes. “You know what I mean.”
Since Josh finished with work the night before, all he could talk about was Ashley freaking Blake. They were supposed to have a date Sunday, but oh no, Josh canceled it to help with setting up for the premiere. Drake asked to watch a movie and cuddle on the couch? Josh had them binge all of Ashley’s movies in one sitting “so I’m ready to meet her tomorrow”. Drake would’ve totally understood if it was Orlando Bloom or Joseph Gordon-Levitt, someone super hot, not a 9 year old actress. It wasn’t that Drake was jealous, he was just annoyed that this girl had taken over his world in the last day.
“Aren’t you a little old for her movies?” Drake asked.
“She happens to make quality films,” Josh answered.
“Oh, come on: Kid Principal, Kid Astronaut, Kid Doctor? What’s next?”
“ Kid President.”
“Go figure.”
“Where’s Ashley?” Megan asked. “I wanna meet her.”
She almost ran off, but Josh was quick enough to pull her back by her shoulder before she caused some mayhem.
“Look Megan, celebrities don’t like it when you get all up in their face,” Josh explained. “You can stay, but you gotta promise to be cool when she gets here.”
Drake knew for a fact Josh would lose his cool as soon as Ashley walked in the door, so he wasn’t one to talk. He could barely keep it together when the Vice President came to town. And almost as if on cue, Drake turned to see the source of his current misery behind him. He tapped his boyfriend’s shoulder and pointed at the group that had walked in: Ashley Blake, a guy who probably was her assistant, and a big, scary, bouncer guy that could probably throw any of them without breaking a sweat.
As expected, Josh gasped as soon as he saw her. “Holy geez, it’s Ashley Blake! And I get to be the first one to meet her…”
Josh went over to shake her hand, but Helen popped up out of nowhere and knocked Josh over in her rush to meet Ashley.
“Ashley Blake.” Helen held out her hand. “Hi, I’m Helen Dubois, manager of this fine theatre.”
“Well, nice to meet you Helen,” Ashley said as she shook Helen’s hand.
It was kind of obvious Ashley wasn’t into the handshake at all, it was like she only did it in order to get by. After what Helen did to get that handshake, Drake couldn’t blame her being a little freaked out by it.
“Y’all hear that?” Helen called out. “Ashley Blake knows my name!”
When Helen walked away, Josh and Megan walked up to Ashley next.
“Hi Ashley,” Josh said. “My name’s Josh, and this is my little sister, uh…”
“Megan!” Megan snapped.
“Megan.”
“Hi, nice to meet you Megan,” Ashley actually shook Megan’s hand. “Oh, cool shirt.”
Megan smiled. “Thanks.”
“Uh Ashley, can I get you a soda or something?” Josh asked.
“Actually, I’d love some bottled water - room temperature?”
“Coming right up.”
Drake followed Josh to the drinks counter since it seemed Megan would be okay. He could admit that it was cool Ashley Blake seemed to treat people like a normal human being, even if she seemed overly-sweet in a weirdly fake way. There were so many stories out there about celebrities who used their fame to be total dicks, and so far, Ashley hadn’t done that. Josh reached for a small tub of bottled waters on the counter, totally willing to do whatever Ashley wanted. He was absolutely starstruck, it was both endearing and weird at the same time.
“She seems pretty cool,” Drake said to make Josh happy.
“Yeah,” Josh had a big smile on his face. “Hey, you think she’ll leave an outgoing message on my cell phone?”
Because Drake was nosey and he’d be stuck there until Megan said so, he picked up a random clipboard off of the drinks counter. He’d expected to see a list of supplies for the premiere, but it was a guest list titled Kid President Premiere After-Party. Josh hadn’t said anything about there being a party with tons of Hollywood stars! Drake recognized a dozen names on the first page alone, and they’d all be a few blocks away from his house!
“Woah, you didn’t tell me there’d be a party after the premiere!” Drake said.
“Yeah, the after-party. What about it?”
“Babe, look who’s on the list: Ashton Cutcher, Adam Sandler, Sandra Bullock.”
“Sandra’s in the movie as the chief of staff. Why are you freaking out about this?”
“Because if there’s gonna be a lot of actors there, there’s also gonna be producers and talent agents. People I could talk to about my music and get a record deal. You’ve gotta get me into this party.”
Josh’s smile went away like Drake had said something wrong. It wasn’t every day Drake could meet so many people who could help his band in one place. He’d never heard anything from Jack Sharma after the earthquake, the party was his only chance to get something even a small amount as massive as the Mega Dome. Josh could easily get him on the list, it shouldn’t have been a big deal.
“No, I can’t,” Josh said.
“Josh-!”
“I’ve gotta get this water back to Ashley.”
Something told Drake that he didn’t time that right. Josh was probably so focused on making a good impression on Ashley that after he got off work would be a better time to ask. Drake flipped through the guest list and saw a lot of the usual suspects, pop stars, models, directors, writers, all the important people that worked on movies. He made a mental note of all of the hot guys who’d be coming to the after-party, and was surprised to see Dakota Fanning’s name on the list.
“Dakota Fanning? Doesn’t she have some kind of beef with Ashley?” Drake asked himself. “I gotta see that.”
Out of nowhere, someone spat loudly. Drake turned to see what the issue was, and it was… Ashley Blake screaming at Josh over the bottle of water he gave her.
“I ASKED FOR ROOM TEMPERATURE, THIS WATER IS CHILLED!” Ashley screamed like a total diva. “ARE YOU TRYING TO KILL ME!?”
Her bodyguard looked ready to beat the shit out of Josh, but Ashley held him back. Josh crumbled under the guard’s glare, absolutely terrified of the massive dude even though he was the same size as him. Drake couldn’t blame Josh, an adult who got paid to shove people around for a living against a kid working a weekend job wasn’t good at all.
“Now, go get me some room temperature water, you big boob!” Ashley ordered.
She shoved the bottle of water into Josh like he spit on her mother or something. Drake watched Josh walk away with a look on his face as if he’d just had all of his hopes and dreams crushed. Josh was definitely in for a rough weekend, and Drake felt really bad for his boyfriend. He’d begged Helen to let him help with the premiere, and now he had to deal with an actual Hollywood brat. Even worse, Megan actually looked more interested in Ashley than she did before. Josh had gotten himself into some deep shit.
***
Josh had come to seriously regret ever watching an Ashley Blake film. She had a freaking assistant to ask for the kind of help she needed, and she still had Josh rush around to do whatever she asked. He grumbled to himself the entire bus ride home, into the house, and upstairs to the sanctuary of his and Drake’s bedroom. He could hear Drake playing his fender, which usually was a comfort, but not at that moment. Josh slammed the door behind him, walked down to the couch, and dropped his heavy backpack next to it. He was absolutely seething with anger.
“What’s the problem, grumbly?” Drake asked.
“You wanna know what the problem is?” Josh asked.
“... yes, hence my question ‘What’s the problem, grumbly?’.”
“Ashley Blake is my problem. That girl is 72 pounds of bleugh!”
Drake looked confused. “You weighed her?”
“She made me! She’s watching her carbs.”
That actually made Drake set his guitar aside. “Wait, what else happened?”
Josh paced in the area between the coffee table and the couch, absolutely fuming. “Well first, it was the water incident. Then she demanded gummy bears, but she doesn’t like the green gummy bears, so I had to take those out. Then she suggested I do sit-ups.”
“That’s ridiculous.”
“I know!”
“Who doesn’t like green gummy bears?”
Josh gave his boyfriend a look to indicate he missed the point. “I can’t believe it. My favorite movie star is such a - is such a - a big meanie! ”
Drake shrugged. “Well, you know what they say about kid-actors.”
“They’re the worst!”
Drake nodded in agreement. Thank god Josh wasn’t the only one who thought everything Ashley asked of him was insane, Helen had told him to ‘deal with it or you’re fired. That girl is a cultural icon and it’s your job to cater to her.’ It wasn’t even his official job description, he was supposed to work the ticket booths, concession stands, and clean messes he was legally allowed to clean up. Josh wasn’t sure he could look at any celebrity the same ever again, and he would bring Drake back down to Earth like a meteor if fame ever went to his head like that. He would never work another Hollywood premiere at the Premier again.
“Well that’s it!” Josh declared. “Helen can find someone else to help with the premiere. I want nothing to do with Ashley Blake!”
Drake jumped down from his loft in a hurry. “Woah, woah, woah, slow down there, Chico! How am I gonna get into the after-party if you’re not there?”
“I told you I couldn’t get you into that. Helen will kill me if I add any guests not approved by Ashley’s assistant.”
“C’mon, we could have fun together at the party. There’s already gonna be a lot of people you’d want autographs from attending. Besides, you kinda owe me for canceling our date Sunday so you could work the premiere.”
Josh glared at his boyfriend and opened his mouth to retort, but stopped himself from saying something he’d regret. He’d thought that being able to work with Ashley Blake would make up for any canceled date of laser tag, and now he regretted ever agreeing to help with the premiere. He’d rather go play laser tag with his boyfriend and make out afterward like they’d planned than spend one more minute with that entitled brat. Josh took some deep breaths to calm his temper since he did bring something home to hopefully start making up for the date.
“You know what? This is too much stress,” Josh said. “I’m just gonna sit down, relax, and have a little snack.”
Drake knew it was a low blow, but he was still kinda pissed that Josh had so easily canceled their date for the chance to meet some actress. He knew how ironic it was for him to be angry about that, he would’ve done that to Josh a year ago while he was still actively dating girls. The difference was that the actress was the same age as his sister and Josh had taken that extra shift to pay for their date. Josh picked up his backpack, unzipped it, and dumped… were those all of the green gummy bears Ashley refused to eat? They made the biggest pile of gummy bears Drake had ever seen on the corner of the coffee table, tons of them spilled onto the floor too. That pile could easily last him until summer break!
“Does this sort of make up for me canceling on you?” Josh asked.
That actually made Drake smile, dammit. “I mean… getting anything Ashley Blake hates is a win for me.” He grabbed a handful of gummy bears and sat on the couch. “If you don’t talk about Ashley Blake for the rest of the night and hang out with me, that’d be even better.”
Josh picked up a single gummy bear and ate it before he sat on the couch too. “Believe me, just thinking about that girl raises my blood pressure, so that’s an easy task.”
And because Josh knew him so well, he picked up the remote and turned to the channel showing America’s Funniest Home Videos . Drake snuggled into Josh’s side with the handful of candy, his boyfriend wrapped an arm around Drake’s shoulders, and they spent the rest of the evening laughing at home movies of people getting pranked. It was actually a pretty good way to distract themselves, and got even better when the show ended and Drake was straddling Josh’s lap to make out with him.
He started with lighter kisses, nothing too racy and still just as sweet as the gummy bears they ate. Josh said he was too tired to do anything other than make out, which was totally fine by Drake. They’d gotten each other off multiple times and the more they did that kind of stuff, the more incredible it got. Having mind-blowing orgasms too many days in a row made his dick hurt. Still, he didn’t object when Josh slid his hand down Drake’s back and cupped his ass through his jeans.
It made Drake really dive into Josh’s mouth, kiss him thoroughly the way that made them both turn to jelly. Josh let out little gasps into his mouth while Drake teased his tongue on the inside of his mouth. It sent electricity through his body, made his hips twitch despite what he agreed to. Drake had to force his hips to stay still for Josh, which he only did because of how stupidly in love he was with his boyfriend. Josh held him close, smelling of movie theatre popcorn and cleaning chemicals. Drake would never get tired of being with him, not ever.
***
Josh appreciated that Drake offered to help him the next day with the premiere… even though he bounced the moment Ashley walked into the lobby. It got even worse when Helen decided that he would be the one to temporarily replace Ashley’s assistant and she ordered him around to do a million things. Apparently a million green gummy bears that Ashley hated wasn’t enough to have Drake’s help with the new she-demon he was meant to deal with. What was worse was that Ashley asked for a refrigerator. Who asked for a full-blown refrigerator!? Well, Josh borrowed the dolly from the stock room, found a refrigerator, and used all the strength he had to push it into the theatre. Ashley was on one of the benches on her cell phone.
“A-ashley - Ashley! I got you your refrigerator.” Josh suddenly had his foot slip and he was forced to kneel. “A little help here, Ashley!?”
“Aw, you’re so sweet - stop being so sweet,” She said to the other person on the phone. “Okay great, you’re fired. Bye.”
Because Josh always had bad luck, his foot slipped, which caused him to fall onto his back underneath the refrigerator. He was pinned by his pelvis with 400 pounds of cool metal and a dolly! What was worse was that none of his coworkers or Ashley’s people bothered to help him up. Ashley didn’t even look concerned, she held her phone up and said,
“Josh, hang this up for me.”
Josh tried to move the refrigerator off of his body, but it was no use. He wasn’t in the right position to get a proper grip on it.
Somehow, Ashley looked annoyed. “Will you quit playing around?”
“I-I’m not playing around,” Josh countered. “You asked me to get you a refrigerator.”
“I asked you to get me a sand-wich. ”
“You said refrigerator!”
“I meant sandwich!”
How was he supposed to know that? “Oh, maybe there’s one in this refrigerator THAT’S CRUSHING MY PELVIS!”
“Just get me one!” And she walked away.
He was stuck on the floor with a refrigerator on top of him, and Ashley Blake still expected him to somehow get her a sandwich without help. If he stayed trapped under the refrigerator for much longer, his legs would probably go numb, then the cells would die from lack of blood flow, then he’d have to have his legs amputated. He was about to turn 16, he was too young to go through the rest of his life without legs! Without any other options, Josh tried to push the heap of metal off of him to no avail. Out of nowhere, Drake’s face came into his field of vision from above, and he looked both confused and concerned.
“Why is there a refrigerator on you?” Drake asked.
“It was supposed to be a sandwich,” Josh groaned. “Can you get this thing off of me?”
Drake looked at the refrigerator. “I can try, but I can’t promise anything. It looks heavy.”
“I will get you into the after-party if you get this off of me and help me be Ashley’s assistant.”
His boyfriend looked surprised. “I was gonna help you anyway, but that definitely sweetens the deal.”
Drake attempted to lift the refrigerator on the first try, kneeling down all the way to get a good grip on it. Already, Josh could feel the blood rush back into his legs and he was almost able to move, then Drake’s grip slipped. The handles of the dolly were in very close proximity to a spot that would have a bad result.
“Gah-gah-gah-gah!” Josh groaned out.
“Will you help me!?”
“I’m trying!”
On the second attempt, Drake got a better grip on the fridge and Josh helped push the hulking mass up. As soon as Drake had a solid hold on the dolly handles, Josh rolled out from under it to freedom. He climbed to his feet and shook his legs out to get rid of the pins and needles feeling while Drake set the fridge and dolly upright. Honestly, the major reason Josh didn’t want to get Drake into the after-party was because he’d distract Josh all night when he’d probably be working. If they were both working, less of a chance to be distracted.
“Thanks, Drake.”
“No problem. But, uh, how do you mistake a refrigerator for a sandwich?”
Josh shrugged since he honestly had no idea. Unfortunately, the moment was interrupted by Ashley returning with a bottle of water. She sat on the bench like she owned it and gave Josh a look.
“Room temperature,” she said. “You could learn something, Josh.”
He turned to his boyfriend. “Go get her a sandwich. She’ll ask for something else, I know it.”
Drake nodded and ran off.
“Josh, get me a matcha boba tea with extra boba, but take half of the boba out,” Ashley said.
That actually made him have to pause for a second from how nonsensical the request was. “Isn’t that just a regular amount of boba?”
“Am I employing you to think!?”
Josh ran out of the theatre to find the nearest cafe that served boba tea.
***
By the time Drake made it home with Josh, his whole body felt wrecked in the worst possible way. Ashley had an almost endless list of demands, every one of them absolutely stupid. What was worse was that Mom and Walter had a friend’s birthday party to go to, so they couldn’t drive them home. They staggered like zombies down the two blocks to the house, and Drake leaned his whole body into the door while he dug his keys out of his pocket. It was pure luck that he didn’t fall into the entryway as soon as he got the door open.
“So tired,” Drake whined.
“Need fluids,” Josh groaned.
Josh turned toward the kitchen while Drake went to the living room. The couch was calling his name like one of those sirens he read about in English.
“I didn’t think evil had a name, but I was wrong , it’s Ashley Blake,” Drake said.
He sprawled out on the couch in a pile of exhaustion. Drake wasn’t even human anymore, he was a pile of bones and skin on a couch that felt like a fancy hotel mattress. He was just happy to be off of his feet for the rest of the night and away from the hellspawn of Hollywood. Josh came out of the kitchen with a bottle of water he chugged.
“I can’t believe she made me give her a piggy-back ride,” Josh said.
“I can’t believe she made me give you a piggy-back ride,” Drake agreed.
Josh put the bottle on the coffee table. “I need to sleep for three weeks.”
Without warning, Josh flopped onto the couch and onto Drake. The back of his head crushed Drake’s right nostril and he couldn’t move.
“Josh?” Drake asked against Josh’s skull.
“Yeah?”
“I’m under you.”
“Deal with it.”
“Move your head.”
Josh moved his head so Drake could breathe. Usually when they cuddled like that, Drake was the little spoon because Josh was a lot heavier than him. Honestly, it wasn’t that bad in a weird way. The pressure of Josh laying on top of him felt weirdly nice, and not in a sexual way. It was like all of that stress he had because of Ashley was being pushed out of him from the weight of his boyfriend on top of him. He was pretty sure the word for it was decompressing. Drake let himself just be in the moment, and he’d figure out why it felt good later.
Then the doorbell rang, and they both yelled at the same time, “MEGAN!”
Drake could hear her walk up to the door and open it. If it was Mormons or a traveling salesman, Drake was more than happy to tell them where to shove it.
“Ashley!” Megan sounded absolutely giddy.
“Fuck no,” Drake groaned as they both stood up.
Sure enough, there was Ashley fucking Blake with her guy Citrus at their front door. How she even knew where they lived was beyond Drake, and he had a weird idea that maybe she had one of those paparazzi guys follow them home. There was no way Helen would give her the address; even she wouldn’t stoop that low.
“Hey Megan,” Ashley greeted. “You remember Citrus?”
“Sure, come on in.” The little traitor stepped aside to let them in.
Both of them walked into the house; Ashley walked in like she owned the place and Citrus stayed back to talk to Megan.
“What’s up, C-Dog?” Megan asked.
“It’s all good.”
Josh couldn’t believe his eyes, Megan and Citrus shared a handshake like they were buddies. That wasn’t good, Ashley was Citrus’ boss and now Megan was friends with both of them! It was Josh and Drake against two she-devils and a bodyguard. Josh wondered how long it would take to write up a will because he wasn’t sure if he’d survive the night. Something like ‘I, Joshua Michael Nichols, bequeath all of my possessions to be separated equally between my father and Grammy’ could work.
“What’re you doing here?” Drake asked Ashley.
Megan stood next to Ashley like they were besties, and Citrus stood behind both of them like a terrifying guardian angel.
“I was bored at my hotel suite,” Ashley explained. “Josh, go get me a soy latte.”
“Woah, woah, woah! You can’t just come into our house and boss us around!” Drake argued.
Megan glanced back at Citrus with an evil smirk. “Looks like she can.”
Ashley looked at her watch. “Wow, look at that, seven seconds have already gone by and still no soy latte! ”
Josh decided to step in front of Drake to try and stand up for both of them. He got them into this mess, it was his duty to get them out of it. Besides, because they were minors who went to school, it was illegal for them to work overtime. He didn’t want to put Helen into that kind of trouble.
“Look, Ashley, I don’t know who you think you are-.”
“I think I’m Ashley Blake,” Ashley snapped. “and I think your boss told you to do anything I say, and I think a soy latte falls under the heading of ‘anything’. You want me to call your boss?”
“I have the number,” Megan said.
“So, if you mess this up, I will thump you like a melon. You follow me?”
Curse his need to appease adults in positions of authority. “Alright, I will get you your soy latte - even though I have no idea what that is. C’mon Drake, help me.”
Drake didn’t move and looked at Josh with an expression of what could only be described as “are you fucking serious” for a long moment. Josh had just wanted extra help with dealing with Ashley all day, he had no idea what kind of hell it would end up being. He was scared Drake would back out, until he finally said,
“That party better be worth it.”
They both went into the kitchen to make whatever a soy latte was. Josh wasn’t really a coffee person, but Drake absolutely was. He hoped his boyfriend knew how to make a latte. Drake got a mug from one of the cabinets and the soy milk from the fridge. He definitely looked confident in what he was doing, that had to be a good sign.
“What even is a soy latte?” Josh asked.
“Coffee with milk and more milk,” Drake explained. “I see the baristas at the Brew Note make it all the time.”
Josh could brew a pot of coffee, he’d seen his Dad do it countless times over the years. He opened the top of the coffee maker, took out the filter and grounds, put in a new set, and started the coffee process. He made sure it was the coffee that Mom and Dad brought out for guests, not the good coffee that they drank every morning.
“So… coffee with a double shot of milk?” Josh asked. “Or creamer and milk?”
Drake looked befuddled by the question. “Coffee with double soy it is.”
From the window to the living room, Josh saw Citrus leave and Ashley and Megan ran to Megan’s room. The only positive from that was Ashley wouldn’t be watching over their shoulders while they made her milky coffee. The coffee maker beeped and Josh used a dish rag to pick up the pot from the machine. Drake wordlessly slid the coffee mug with lots of soy milk in it over. Josh couldn’t understand how someone could turn into such an insufferable person before they turned 10. Most people were inherently good in Josh’s experience, and Ashley was so far away from that human element that he wasn’t sure there was anything to save her.
“At least Megan’ll keep Ashley off our backs for a while,” Josh sighed as he poured the coffee. “How does fame turn such a little girl so rotten?”
Drake grabbed a spoon from the silverware drawer and stirred it. “No idea, but if everything works out with my music, I’m never working on something with her in it. I’ll put it as a clause in all of my contracts if I have to.”
“But you’re not an actor.”
“Bands get signed to do music for movies.”
Drake blew on the cup, and Josh decided to try and cheer him up for a moment. He grabbed Drake’s favorite mug from the cupboard, poured him a cup of coffee, and dumped half of the sugar container into the coffee. His boyfriend was notorious for not considering something a comfort food unless it either had buckets of sugar in it or a whole bunch of carbs. The coffee would at least keep him awake for however long Ashley stayed at the house until she got bored. Josh used a different spoon to stir the coffee, and handed it to Drake, who smiled tiredly at him.
It wasn’t an accident that they stayed in the kitchen far longer than was necessary to make the drink Ashley wanted. Josh didn’t hurry them up, they both spent the next twenty minutes complaining about all of the ridiculous things Ashley made them do. Apparently, she tried to convince Drake to give her a foot massage, and he shut that down so hard and fast that Ashley had to call in a masseur instead. She was still a kid, why would she even need a foot massage?
Eventually, they had to face Ashley and heard giggling upstairs in their bedroom. Drake took the lead since he was the one who technically brewed the soy latte, and opened the door to a terrible surprise. A white substance that reeked of ranch dressing fell on him and coated almost his whole upper body. Josh was lucky enough to still be on the stairs, so he didn’t get any ranch on him, but Drake stood oddly still while Megan and Ashley laughed at him. Josh peeked over his shoulder to see Ashley and Megan laughing, and Megan had the camcorder in her hand.
“That was a great idea!” Ashley declared.
“I know, right?” Megan cheered.
The two little girls high-fived, cementing themselves as double trouble incarnate in Josh’s book. Drake shook some of the ranch off of his hands before he held out the mug.
“Your soy latte?” Drake offered with a tight voice.
It was clear Drake was on the verge of losing it, and Josh couldn’t blame him one bit. Ashley Blake had waltzed into their house like she owned it, forced them to make her a coffee, and thanked them for their hard work by dousing Drake in ranch dressing. Josh waited with baited breath as he watched Ashley look at the coffee in Drake’s hand.
Her face twisted into disgust. “There’s ranch in my soy latte. I can’t drink it now. Go make another one.”
Drake dropped the cup onto the carpet where it spilled into the ranch, went back downstairs to the bathroom, slammed the door, and screamed. And even worse, Megan and Ashley laughed more at the pain they caused Drake. It set Josh’s blood boiling that Ashley took actual joy in causing pain to others like some kind of psychopath. He knew Drake said the night they got together that he’d be the shield for both of them, but on this night, Josh would make sure they never had to be anywhere near Ashley Blake again. She was spoiled, evil, and possibly the worst person Josh had ever met in his entire life.
“That’s it!” Josh stepped over the ranch and towered over Ashley. “I don’t care who you are, what movies you’ve made, or who you know, I am done helping you, you little hellion! Get out of my house!”
Ashley actually had the gall to look offended by his outburst. “You can’t talk to me like that!”
“You can’t kick her out!” Megan tried to say.
“I’ll tell on myself to Helen, that’s how serious I am about it!” Josh yelled. “Now scram, anti-Christ of Hollywood!”
Ashley let out a high-pitch scream, picked up her purse, and stomped downstairs. Josh knew he would get chewed out by Helen over losing his cool with Ashley, and he didn’t care. He and Drake didn’t deserve that kind of abuse from anyone, least of all Ashley Blake and Megan combined. When the front door slammed, Josh took the camcorder from Megan, turned the recording off, and ejected the tape.
“What’re you doing?” Megan asked.
Josh held the tape up. “This is insurance for if you ever try something that severe again. If you don’t want me to show this to Mom and Dad or ruin your precious friend Ashley’s reputation, you’re gonna help me clean up this mess. No invisible ink, no ‘oops, I switched the carpet cleaner for bleach’, none of it. Capiche?”
Megan crossed her arms with a pout, but she nodded. Josh had a safety deposit box at the bank with his savings account, he had a plan to store the tape there in case he ever needed leverage before he graduated high school. Drake would probably be proud of him when Josh told him about it. He’d added to the Brave Boy tape a few days ago ago ‘Megan, this is a special moment. You destroy this, you’re dead.’ on the other side of the tape. It had never served him badly to be overly-cautious around Drake’s sister.
***
Drake scrubbed at his body and hair until they were red and raw. It wasn’t just the ranch he wanted to get off him, it was the horrible feeling that took over like every single noise and light was too much. He’d had it before when he started playing music at concerts, but he’d learned to deal with it once he got over how loud the music was when he was on stage. It had to be the stress of having Ashley in the house, and so far, no one had come banging at the bathroom door to force him out of the shower. He hated feeling like that, it was like a migraine but instead of pain, he was uncomfortable to the extreme. He nearly cried when someone actually knocked on the door.
“Go away, Ashley!” Drake screamed.
“It’s Josh, Ashley’s gone,” Josh said through the door.
Drake turned off the water. “Gimme a minute!”
He forgot to grab clothes to change into when he came into the bathroom, and he didn’t have a robe to cover up with like Josh did. He wasn’t ready to show Josh the scars on his thighs, at least not yet. Drake grabbed a towel from the rack, quickly ran it through his hair, then wrapped it around his waist. When he opened the door, Josh was still in his work clothes, but the sleeves were rolled up, his shirt was open, and his vest was gone. Drake must have had some kind of bad look on his face because Josh looked freaked out when he saw him.
“Drake… don’t tell me you…” Josh said.
“I… what?”
His boyfriend looked down both ends of the hall before he leaned close to whisper, “Did Ashley Blake push you into cutting again?”
“No! I will show you my thighs right now if you want proof.”
Josh held up his hands in surrender. “Okay, okay.”
Drake shook some of the water out of his hair. As if Ashley Blake was important enough for him to break out the razors again. She was just an entitled, spoiled brat that he would gladly forget he ever met. And speaking of, he couldn’t hear her yell for anything with the door open. He’d heard her scream earlier, and it nearly made him slip because it came out of nowhere.
“How’d you get her to leave?” Drake asked.
“I told her that she’s evil and she needed to leave. She was furious. ”
Drake was shocked. “You actually stood up for yourself?”
Josh shrugged with a smile, as if standing up to someone important wasn’t a big deal for him.
“And you let me miss it?” Drake asked.
“I wasn’t gonna interrupt you washing the ranch off, that’d be rude and gross.”
Despite how shitty he felt, the whole thing actually made Drake smile. Somehow when he wasn’t looking, Josh had started to grow a backbone and it was pretty hot. Maybe they could do something actually fun like skip class to watch a movie or pull a prank on the gym teacher. There were so many possibilities if Josh kept learning to stand up for himself.
“At least she’ll never hire us as her assistants again. She’s just…” Drake tried to think of a way to describe Ashley without saying the wrong thing. “-a terrible human being.”
Josh stepped to the side and Drake went upstairs to their room. He expected to have to step over a pile of ranch dressing and soy coffee when he opened the door, but the carpet looked like there hadn’t been any spill on it at all. That explained what Josh had been doing after Ashley left since he was the one out of the two of them who knew how to clean that well. Drake climbed up to his loft to grab his pajamas off the bed. He made sure to keep his back to Josh so he couldn’t see the scars.
By the time he jumped back down, Josh had taken off his work clothes and had pajama pants on. He pulled on a shirt while Drake got himself a Mountain Fizz from the mini fridge and one of the dozen plastic baggies of green gummy bears he had stashed away. Drake needed to chill in front of the TV, drink some sugary soda, and eat the gummy bears Ashley hated. Was the feeling he had called spite? That definitely fit what he felt about that demon child. He clicked through a bunch of channels until he heard some dial tones behind him. Drake turned to see Josh dialing a number on his cell.
“Who’re you calling?” Drake asked.
Josh looked like he was about to walk into a firing squad. “I told Ashley that I’d call Helen on myself, so I’m gonna do it.”
Josh expected Drake to keep watching TV, instead he turned it off, stepped over the back of the couch, and sat next to Josh on his bed with a Mountain Fizz in his hand. Josh was pretty sure he would be fired by the end of the call for blowing up at a celebrity, though he was happy to have Drake with him to get through it. He dialed Helen’s office number to bypass any of his coworkers and put the phone on speaker. With every second that passed while he waited for Helen to pick up, Josh felt his anxiety skyrocket to critical levels.
“Premier Theatre, Manager Helen Dubois speaking,” Helen said upon picking up. “No, I will not comment on Ashley Blake’s premiere tomorrow night.”
“Helen, it’s Josh,” Josh said.
“Josh who?”
There was never a time it didn’t hurt that she didn’t remember his name. “Josh Nichols, Drake’s boyfriend.”
“Oh, you.” Her voice audibly dropped to annoyance. “Can you explain to me why Ashley Blake is demanding I fire you? I’ve got twenty messages on my office answering machine saying you’re some kind of incompetent loser.”
“That’s just mean.”
“I know. You’re a loser, but you’re far from incompetent.”
At least she thought he was competent, that would at least give him a chance of a good job reference. Maybe it wouldn’t be too bad if he found another job, his next manager might actually remember his name and promote him to a position he was capable of. Still, he liked being able to watch any movie he wanted while he was on shift and cleaning up the concession stand. He would miss being a theatre attendant.
“She came to my house after the hours I’m legally required to work, demanded a soy latte, and covered Drake in a bucket of ranch dressing.”
“She did what to Drake!?”
Before Josh could explain, Drake leaned into the phone and answered, “She put a bucket of ranch over the door and I walked into it. Then told us she couldn’t drink the latte she forced us to make. Ranch dressing in all the places I never wanted it.”
“Drake, honey, are you okay!?”
“I’m good. Honestly, Josh deserves, like, quadruple the pay he would’ve gotten working the premiere, and the day off tomorrow. I know you were all excited about meeting a movie star, but Ashley Blake is terrible.”
If there wasn’t enough of a reason for Josh to love his boyfriend, using his powers of manipulation for good was definitely one of them. Josh had seen the small things Drake had done to help Josh win Helen’s favor over the last few months, so smooth in their execution that if someone blinked, they would miss it. Josh mouthed “thank you” to Drake while they waited for Helen’s answer.
She sighed on the other line. “You have no idea how many complaints I’ve been getting from my own employees about this girl. I’m sorry to have put you boys through the ringer with her.”
They celebrated for two seconds before they sat back down.
“To be clear, I don’t expect quadruple pay,” Josh said. “But the day off tomorrow would be… nice?”
Drake gave him a thumbs-up.
“I’ll cover your shift myself tomorrow, Josh,” Helen conceded. “and I’ll add an extra $50 to both days you worked with Ashley Blake. But not overtime since she showed up to your house without discussing it with me first. And Drake? You can come to the after-party with a plus one.”
That was even better than he hoped for. “That’s fine, great even. Thank you so much, Helen.”
“Enjoy slacking off on the most important night of my life, loser.”
Josh hung up the phone, and they both stood up to celebrate with happy dances. $100 and access to a ton of celebrities that weren’t Ashley Blake? That was as perfect of an outcome as anything Josh could dream! Unfortunately, Josh’s celebration was cut short by a cramp in his lower back, still tender from the amount Ashley overworked him. Drake stopped and held his side with a groan of pain. They definitely were not manual labor kinds of guys.
“Bed?” Josh asked.
“Bed,” Drake answered.
Drake limped over to the lightswitch while Josh put his phone on his nightstand. He pulled the covers back and crawled into his side of the bed, his back throbbing despite his comfortable mattress. It was still strange sharing a bed with Drake, and not in a bad way. In fact, the nights Josh got the best sleep was when he shared his bed with Drake. Sure, they were only able to do that on Fridays and Saturdays, but it was like his boyfriend’s mumbling and body heat made his unconscious mind feel safe because his person was there in his bed. Drake pulled back the covers on his side and groaned in pain as he got comfortable under the blankets.
“I am never going to let myself get that spoiled, I swear to God,” Drake declared.
“Well, if you ever did, I’d force you back down to Earth so fast your head would spin.”
“That’d be when I’m, like, 20. You think we’d still be together in four years?”
“Yeah.”
Drake turned to look at him in the dark. “You’d stay together that long?”
Josh smiled at him since the answer was easy. “Yeah, I would.”
It looked like Drake was about to lean over to kiss him, but he flinched and flopped back onto his back. “I am so not looking forward to turning 40. This sucks!”
“Me neither.”
***
After spending the first part of the day doing absolutely nothing, Drake and Josh dressed up for the after-party. They both agreed to stay as far away from Ashley as they physically could, and Drake had his iBox loaded with the tracks he’d recorded with his band in the garage. He was ready to knock the socks off of any music producer interested in his music! Drake checked his hair in the bathroom mirror one more time and used the cologne Josh let him borrow. They didn’t know how dressed up to get for the after-party, so they went with the suits they wore for Mom and Walter’s wedding.
Drake left the bathroom and saw Josh come downstairs fully ready. Strangely enough, he filled out the suit a lot better now. The suit kind of hung on Josh awkwardly a year ago because it was too big, and now it actually looked like he picked something that fit him. It must have been because he was getting taller, he was almost three inches taller than Drake already.
Josh seemed to notice Drake ogling him and he straightened his tie. “I don’t look like I’m wearing a paper bag?”
“Who said you look like that?”
“You did, on Mom and Dad’s wedding day.”
“Your dad got you a suit that was too big. Now it actually looks like it fits you. It looks good.”
Josh smiled. “Thanks. You ready to go?”
“Yep.”
Before they could make it to the front door, Mom called out for Drake to meet her in the kitchen. It probably was a last-minute safety talk about going to an adult party, so both he and Josh went to the kitchen… or he thought it was until he saw his mom reading Behind the Stables at the kitchen island. Shit, he thought he’d hidden the book well enough that she couldn’t read the cover! From how far she was into the book, she had read some pretty intense porn sections already.
“I found that book you were reading at the store,” Mom said. “I can see why you like it so much. Viscount Belmont falling in love outside of his social class? It’s so intriguing.”
Drake could hear Josh take in a breath to probably agree with her, so he put his hand over his boyfriend’s mouth. “Great. Glad you like it. Bye.”
He rushed them both out of the kitchen and out the front door to escape the absolute embarrassment of his Mom knowing he read a gay smutty romance book. If it was one of the straight romance books he knew his Mom had a collection of, that’d be different because at least he’d be reading about a guy and a girl having sex. What the hell did she think Drake was into now that she read the book!? Drake held onto Josh’s hand once they got to the sidewalk and headed toward the theatre.
“Do you think she knows-?” Josh tried to ask.
“I don’t even wanna think about it,” Drake cut in. “Let’s go.”