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“Are you sure you’re alright Sonic?” His brother asked as he was putting away the tools he had been using to tinker with his plane. Sonic was sitting in the corner of the yellow fox’s lab, eyes glazed over, staring at nothing in particular.
At Tails’ words, a blue ear first shifted towards his voice. Then the blue hedgehog shook his head to get rid of the deep train of thought he was in.
“Yeah bud,” he smiled. “Just thinking.”
The kit gave him a look, but eventually shrugged it off and got back to work putting away his tools. “I’m gonna go to bed,” he said to his brother. “Don’t stay up too late. You look like you could use some sleep.” Another glance at Sonic and the fox was out of sight past the door frame.
Alone in the room, Sonic sighed and got up, reluctantly making his way to his room. The blue hedgehog ran his hands over the small collection of books on his shelf. He was still mourning the other versions of his friends that he had gotten to know, and the guilt of having gotten into that situation in the first place.
Sonic’s heart ached for Nine, and for Rebel, and Prim, and everyone else he had met a week ago and had to leave behind.
A week of being home, pretending he was okay, and keeping a smile on his face for the sake of his friends.
He told them. Sure, he told them the basics of what happened. But not what it made him feel, not the turmoil that he had faced, or the choices he had to make. And certainly not the fact that he had almost died if it weren’t for..
Shadow…
The blue hedgehog looked out his window at the night sky above. It was alight with stars. Twinkling on like nothing had ever happened. Like the world hadn’t collapsed for a second.
Shadow was the only one who could testify to what he witnessed, but the black hedgehog had disappeared since taking the paradox prism away.
Not that Sonic had gone looking for him. Shadow probably wanted to be left alone after that ordeal. He wasn’t going to go looking.
But the only other option in his mind was to get into his bed and wrap the covers around him and drift into a deep sleep like nothing had ever happened.
But it had happened.
So, Sonic found himself donning his sneakers and tiptoeing down the steps to gingerly slip out the front door.
The blue hedgehog sighed as he stepped into the clear, cool night. If he couldn’t find Shadow, at least a run through the forest would do him some good.
He ran past the palm trees and further inland, finding himself speeding deeper into the forest.
He soon came upon the small, neat cottage that Shadow occasionally called home.
A garden lined the side of the house, and the blue hedgehog took a moment to examine it, bending down and letting a gloved hand run over the delicate petals of a flower.
The edges were withered and crackled a bit under Sonic’s touch. He quickly removed his hand so as to not damage it further.
Sonic was stalling, trying to conjure either the bravery to leave, or the shamelessness to stay.
Chances are Shadow wasn’t even here. No lights were on.
The blue hedgehog considered giving up, but a small part of him urged him up the steps. Just in case.
Sonic walked up to the front door, a beautiful light mahogany with a pattern of rectangles carved into the wood.
He sighed and lifted his gloved hand to knock.
“Faker,” a voice behind him said.
Sonic jumped, whipping his head to the side to see Shadow staring at him from the grass a few meters away.
His ruby eyes glanced at the dying flowers in the garden. It was then Sonic noticed that he was holding a small pair of pruning shears.
Shadow was silent for a moment, and Sonic racked his brain thinking about what to say, but he wasn’t able to voice any words.
“They aren’t native here.” The dark hedgehog finally spoke. “They need extensive care, and-“ he sighed. “When I was away, they started dying.”
“Where have you been?” Sonic blurted out so quickly that he was on the cusp of interrupting.
Shadow tossed the shears in the grass by the flower bed as he made his way up to where Sonic was standing. He brushed past the blue hedgehog to unlock the door.
“After putting the prism somewhere safe. I requested to join a travel mission at G.U.N.”
Shadow opened the front door with a creak and flicked on the interior light, the warm glow contrasting the cooler shine of the moon as it flowed out from the windows.
He turned his head to meet Sonic’s eyes once again, stomach churning with the guilt of leaving so quickly. He had just needed time to himself. But now seeing the blue hedgehog’s slightly widened eyes as he shifted his weight back and forth, Shadow regretted ever leaving him to deal with all of that by himself. It was no wonder Sonic had sought him out for comfort. It made sense. But still, Shadow had been struggling with figuring out his emotions as well, and he wasn’t sure he was ready.
“Would you like something to drink?” He offered reluctantly.
…
“I was worried.” Sonic said softly. He fidgeted with the cuffs of his gloves as he sat down at Shadow’s kitchen island and watched him fill a kettle with water. “I wasn’t sure you were okay.”
The dark hedgehog’s back was turned, the gas stove clicking on. Sonic’s ear twitched at the clink of the kettle onto the metal grate.
“Why wouldn’t I be?” Shadow asked, pushing a whole slue of unprocessed emotions as deep down as he could. He opened a cabinet over the counter and started rummaging through it.
Sonic was silent; still internally arguing with himself about going through with what he was about to say.
“I’m not,”’ he breathed a sigh of relief, even as his hands trembled with adrenaline.
Shadow pulled out multiple boxes of tea, slamming them on the counter perhaps more violently than intended. He wanted to console Sonic. He also wanted to yell at him.
He did neither. The black hedgehog didn’t speak, but Sonic found his voice again.
“I’m not okay, Shadow.” His voice broke. “I lost so many versions of my friends. Versions that I grew close to, learned to see as individuals, and had to leave again.” The blue hedgehog took a shaky breath as his vision blurred for a moment.
“And I-“ he stuttered. “I’ve been trying to keep it together. Trying to act like things are back to normal. But they’re not.”
“Don’t you have other people to talk to about this?” Shadow finally asked. More concerned rather than annoyed. He understood why, but he wanted to make sure.
Sonic shook his head even though Shadow was still facing away from him. “None of my friends will understand like you do. And either way, I don’t want to burden them with my problems.”
Shadow scoffed. “But burdening me isn’t an issue?” He didn’t mean to say it, and the annoyance in his voice was more because of him rather than Sonic.
Sonic sat back in his chair and considered Shadow’s words. “If you want me to leave, just say the word,” he said quietly.
“No,” Shadow sighed, and his expression softened, perhaps with a bit of guilt behind it. The dark hedgehog turned to place the boxes of tea in front of Sonic. “Pick one,” he said, and averted Sonic’s eyes the entire time.
He quickly went back to facing the stove. For no reason other than to examine how the flames danced under metal, as if trapped in an unknown place and desperate to break free.
He wouldn’t have been able to live with himself if he couldn’t save Sonic. Even the threat had the black hedgehog reconsidering their every interaction. But still, he couldn’t do it. He couldn’t be as close to Sonic as he wanted to.
“Shadow. I almost died…” Sonic continued, causing the black hedgehog to slam his fists loudly on the counter.
He turned to Sonic, eyes nearly fully of fury, but still too soft to be true anger. “Don’t you think I know that!?”
Sonic was astonished to find hurt in the dark hedgehog’s voice.
“Shadow, I-“
“Save it.” Shadow interrupted and gestured to the tea. “Pick one.”
Sonic quickly looked over the flavors provided and picked up the box of jasmine tea. Shadow nodded curtly and turned back around to continue making the tea.
“I’m sorry.” The blue hedgehog whispered. “I know the whole thing was my fault. I understand that you hate me, but-” Sonic paused, starting to question again why he was even here.
He could see Shadow’s dark ears flick back at his words. The black hedgehog's hands gripped the counter as he leaned over it.
Sonic’s words lit a fire of anger in him. Not at the blue hedgehog, but at Shadow himself for not just saying what he had been thinking since they first found each other in the void again.
“I don’t hate you, Sonic.” He sighed. “In fact.” Shadow paused, started to say something, and then changed his mind. Just say it. The most desperate part of his mind pleaded.
“What is it?” The blue hedgehog asked slowly.
Shadow poured the hot water into two mugs, the aroma from the tea rising with the steam. Sonic’s ears, which were pointed forward as he waited for a response, twitched in response to the clink of the ceramic hitting the island countertop.
The dark hedgehog finally sat down next to Sonic. He slid a bowl of sugar towards him and Sonic murmured a thanks before spooning some into his warm beverage.
Shadow brought his own mug to his lips and let the calming scent of the tea waft into his nose as he took a deep breath. Now was as good a time as any. Maybe it will numb the pain? The thought flitted in and out of his mind in an instant, but it was still the push he needed.
“When you-“ he rethought his words. “In the last few minutes before we got home, I realized.” He swallowed hard. “I've lost before. But I don’t think I could have done it again. Not you. I couldn’t lose you, Sonic.”
Sonic was taken aback when he felt Shadow’s hands ever so slightly moving to touch the blue hedgehog’s wrist. He smiled and interlocked his fingers with Shadow’s with the intention of providing comfort. And his pulse quickened automatically in response to the touch.
“I wanted to hate you. I tried to, but,” he laughed softly, almost like a whisper. A sound that filled Sonic with the utmost joy and caused him to squeeze the dark hedgehog’s hand. “Sometimes, you make that impossible, hedgehog. Turns out you can destroy the world as we know it-” Sonic opened his mouth to defend himself, but Shadow kept speaking. “-and there will still be a part of me that refuses to hate you. No matter how hard I try.”
“What are you saying, Shadow?” The blue hedgehog asked. His mind raced with so much adrenaline he might as well have been about to save the world again. Still much in denial, part of Sonic’s brain eagerly anticipated his next words.
“You’re insufferable Sonic. And I think I’m in love with you.”
Red eyes glanced guiltily down to Sonic’s mouth. Longing for something he was afraid wouldn’t come as he waited for a reply.
That reply, however, were peach lips coming closer to his. He had gotten up from his seat and his hands moved gingerly to the dark hedgehog’s hips.
The sweet and grassy scent of Sonic that he had burned into his mind since that day mixed with the floral aromas of the tea they had forgotten.
“Shadow,” whispered the blue hedgehog. Their faces were close, and Sonic’s breath was hot against Shadow’s cheek. “Can I kiss you?”
Shadow’s hands found themselves wrapped around Sonic, pulling him closer and allowing their lips to crash together at last.
Sonic was surprised at how warm and soft Shadow’s lips were against his own. And how gentle and calculated the dark hedgehog’s touches were. Caressing Sonic’s fur, running fingers through his quills and pulling him closer to deepen the kiss.
He was gentle when Sonic was injured, sure. But still he had carried the blue hedgehog with a sense of urgency,
And now, for once in his life, Sonic didn’t mind how the stillness of the moment made him feel. The soft groans and breaths Shadow let out between kisses were music to the blue hedgehog’s ears.
“Faker~” Sonic teased when they finally pulled away, momentarily bringing out his usual liveliness. He traced along Shadow’s collar bone with his hand and brought it up his neck to cup his jaw.
“Sonic.” Shadow whispered, still in shock of what was happening. He wrapped his arms around Sonic’s back and pulled him into a hug. Sonic reciprocated immediately and buried his face in Shadow’s neck with a sigh. “I want to help you, what can I do?”
Sonic hummed as they swayed slightly in their tight embrace. “I just don’t wanna be alone,” he whispered.
Shadow sighed; grateful the night had turned out like this. He didn’t want Sonic to leave any more than the blue hedgehog wanted to. “Would you like to stay the night?”
…
“You’re so comfy” Sonic said as he nuzzled his cheek into Shadow’s chest. Shadow had suggested Sonic get some sleep, so they had migrated to Shadow’s bed. The dark hedgehog hummed in amusement at Sonic’s comment, and he ran his paw pads down the soft expanse of Sonic’s back.
“Will your brother be worried?” Shadow asked.
“Nah, he’s used to me just coming and going. I texted him that I was fine anyways,” the blue hedgehog mumbled before yawning.
“You should get some sleep,” Shadow said. He kissed Sonic between his ears, lips lingering on the blue fur there for a moment.
“Nooo I wanna savor this,” Sonic whined into the black hedgehog’s shoulder.
Shadow laughed. “I’ll still be here tomorrow Faker. I’m not going anywhere.” He tightened his arm around Sonic, whose eyes were already closed. “Not this time.”