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Angel finally got a day off…
And Charlie dragged him into some earth game called Uno.
Alastor was kicking everyone’s ass.
Angel was getting his ass kicked the worst.
“This is the shit they play on earth now? Poor suckas.” He needed four hands to hold his cards.
“Back in my day-”
“Your day?” Vaggie smiled. “That’s the most old man shit I’ve ever heard you say.”
“Fuck off.”
“Your boyfriend is rubbing off on you~”
“Husk isn’t my…” Angel paused, mad at how flustered he was getting. “Husk isn’t that old. Are you, Whiskas?”
The cat beside him scoffed, ears lowering. “I croaked at sixty.”
“Sixty? So that means…” Angel counted on his fingers. “Jesus, Whiskers, you’re a hag.”
“I’m only seven years older than you.”
“Still a hag.” Angel stuck his tongue out at Husk’s pouty face. He smacked down a skip card and wondered.
“Hey, Vagina, how old did you die?”
Vaggie rolled her eye. “I didn’t.”
“What!?” Angel glared at her. “You just spawned in heaven? Lucky bitch.”
“I wasn’t so lucky to be named Vagina was I?”
That got a laugh out of him. It got a louder laugh out of Charlie which shocked everyone.
Angel waved a hand. “Quit chit chattin and pick a card so I can lose already.”
Vaggie reached to do just that, but her stack was gone. Fat Nuggets was waddling away with her cards again. She sighed.
“I’m gonna turn that pig into bacon.”
“Not a chance, tuts.” Angel scooped Nugs up and rubbed his oinking belly, smiling. “How could you eat somethin so adowable~?”
“With a fork.” Vaggie drew a wet card from the pig’s mouth. “And a side of eggs.”
“Evil. See, this is why you fell outta heaven.”
“Ahem,” Charlie cleared her throat. “It’s my turn now!”
Charlie put down a draw four.
So did Alastor.
And Husk.
And Vaggie.
Angel drew sixteen fucking cards.
“You won again, Al!” Charlie said.
“I did?” Alastor, aka the third wheel to this double date shit, looked at his solitary card. “Oh. Uno.”
Angel threw cards from all six arms. “He voodoo rigged it.”
Charlie clapped. “This was a good lesson!”
“On what?” Angel spat. “How to waste my day off?”
“How to be a good sportsman. Besides…” Charlie kissed Vaggie’s cheek, “I like seeing both of my angels get along.”
Vaggie blushed.
Angel groaned. He shot a glare at Husk who was giggling and wrapping a wing around him.
Fuck Uno.