Chapter Text
he still remembers what he said to boston that night. the wind was gently caressing his cheeks, as if to comfort him even though his heart felt like it was going to explode.
“i’ll start to love myself more.”
he noticed how boston’s facial expressions fell at his words and for a moment, nick had the urge to throw his arms around him but he held back. it was better for both of them like this. this love felt so raw and passionate yet they were like two puzzle pieces that were never going to fit each other.
it had been three years since they had that conversation. boston flew off to new york to pursue his dream as a photographer and nick had already started working. at the start, his fingers would often hover above boston’s instagram account, wondering about his life without him. but he promised himself that he would stick to his words. so he focused on himself, his friends and his studies. he believed that he would never forget about boston, he wouldn’t want to even, but he would just want to smile at the fond memories instead. and that would be the end between them.
until one day, he found a familiar photo showcased right in front of him.
“isn’t this you?” sand questioned, shoving his phone right in front of nick’s face. his eyes widened slightly at the screen in shock. that is definitely him but he doesn’t remember the existence of it. he zoomed in on the photo, analyzing it for any potential hints of where it was taken.
and then it hits him.
it was the day before he fought with boston at the club. nick furrowed his eyebrows, trying to think back to what happened that day.
boston slipped his fingers gently to intertwine with nick’s as they walked side by side at the park. nick felt his body freeze up a little, staring at boston in awe for a second. even at the slightest touch, it made his heart pound. “
what? it’s just hand holding, we have done much more.” boston teased, leaning his face closer to him and gently blew right above nick’s eyes. his eyelids fluttered, cheeks flustered at his words as he mumbled. “it’s nothing…”
he quickly turned his head away, boston’s laughter filling up the silence before nick spotted a swing. his eyes instantly lit up as he ran towards the swing. he let his legs dangle, staring up into the sky. boston gently shook his head, smiling as he reached for his camera to capture the sight before him.
“this was back when i was still with boston..” nick mumbled as he clicked into the instagram account. he realized that it was mostly filled with scenery and a few occasional photos of a person. it didn’t take long for him to guess that it was him.
‘thesunsetswithmyheart’
“is this boston? he’s back in thailand? and he’s holding an exhibition?” sand bombarded nick with a bunch of questions while he furiously types on his phone.
nick felt his mind blank out. he never expected his name to ever pop up again, let alone his entire existence being back in thailand. he closed his eyes as he took in deep breaths. he thinks he’s doing a pretty good job. if it was him 3 years ago, he would probably already start to plan his outfit to meet boston. but this time, all he did was smile.
sand eyed his friend, leaning over to wrap his arm around nick’s shoulder. “what’s with that smile on your face?”
“why? do you think i’ll go running after him again?” nick joked, a small smile appearing on his face.
“you better not! i know you are better than this, friend.” sand elbowed him as he exclaimed, laughing.
nick could only shake his head and laugh. he leaned on sand’s shoulder with his eyes closed. silence slowly filled the room but it was comforting somehow. he knew he could count on sand if he needed any advice. but he could already tell sand would want to smack him on the head.
“just to let you know, i’ve moved on from him.”
“mmhm.. and just to let you know, people who normally say that definitely are not over their relationship.” sand scoffed, pushing nick’s head away from him.
nick clicked his tongue with sand’s response. “but you have to admit it wasn’t as bad as last time.”
he could still remember the days where he couldn’t function, going through his days like a lifeless doll. coming back home just to stare at the ceiling, sometimes he would cry like a baby and sand would have to quietly sit next to him. although he knew ray was definitely nagging at sand on the phone. but nick never told him about it. he knew it was just ray’s way of whining to sand and he would never let sand leave nick at the state he was.
“okay fine, it was progress.” sand sighed. “but he is holding a photography exhibition in like 2 days.”
nick stares at sand for a moment before he looks away. what does he want to do? nick wasn’t very sure himself. “sand…”
sand sighed, he placed his hand on nick’s shoulders and gave nick an encouraging smile. “as long as you don’t put him over yourself again, nick.”
he knows that.
“i’m surprised. i thought you would have gone to the exhibition.” ray said, munching on the snacks ray had given him on a small plate. nick decided to head over to the resort to pass some time. he shrugged at ray’s words. to be honest, he was surprised himself.
he moved on, really. but somewhere deep in his heart, he wasn’t sure if he was scared of the thought of meeting boston again. nick didn’t want to answer that question.
“will you regret it?” this time, sand joins the conversation.
will he regret it like how he regretted trusting boston one more time? that seems to be another question that nick doesn't want answers to. “i don’t know.”
“if you’re already hesitating, that’s your answer.” ray shrugs back, leaning his head on sand’s shoulders.
that's when he realized. he was scared to meet the same boston that he left three years ago but life is always filled with uncertainty. just like how he used to crumble without their relationship but now he has moved on to love himself first.
‘i want to see him again.’
nick cursed under his breath as he stood up, walking away.
“do you want them to get back together?” sand asked, staring at the figure that just left.
“i may not like boston, but i did see how he treated nick back then. it’s up to him to not fuck up again. i just gave nick a little push.” ray explained, leaning in to give sand a kiss. “at least now you can spend more time with me.”
“ray, you little sneaky ass.” sand laughed, kissing him back.
“but you love me too much to do anything about it, right?”
“you’re damn right about that, baby.”