Chapter Text
The Lan Clan of Gusu is famous in the Cultivation world for being upstanding members of society. Their rules keep them in line and produce fine, young people ready to enhance society and be a credit to their families.
They are also cursed, but not much about this is known past the Ivory Pillars of Cloud Recesses.
The curse is this: by age twenty-one, they will find their Soul Mate. If they fail to do this, by their twenty-ninth birthday, they are fated to die.
Lan Zhan often thinks that the one who bestowed this curse upon his Clan, was a kind soul. Why not, when it made those who had actually found their fated mates so happy?
Why not, when they had allowed a further eight years to find The One?
So, he never bothered too much about it.
He became complacent.
He spent his time reading scriptures, mastering swordplay, cultivating music and going on night hunts.
He sought after perfection, and then, he became perfect.
At first, his family supported him.
His Uncle Qiren and his Xiongzhang, XiChen, said it was fine, even if he didn't find his Soul Mate when he turned twenty-one, that was alright. He had plenty of time.
As more and more people of around his age grew up with him, Lan Zhan started attending weddings, and the frequency of these happy occasions began to increase. In the beginning, he didn't mind so much. Weddings were just somewhere to be, and so what if he had to attend alone?
But, as he grew older, people began giving him odd looks.
And then, the whispering began, loud enough for his ears.
"That's the Second Jade of Gusu…what a waste…"
"He's so perfect…but what is the point? No one will give him a daughter, if her only fate is to become a young widow."
Gossiping was not allowed, but when these people were challenged, they defended themselves by saying that they were merely pointing out the truth.
Those same varying comments became sympathetic…until Lan Zhan decided he did not need to go beyond the Jingshi when he was not carrying out his duties.
Eight long and lonely years later, one day his brother came to see him.
XiChen was happily married to Nie MingJue and they were raising a young family together.
It was hard for Lan Zhan to be happy for him, and not think about his own situation. So he decided to forget about himself in this matter.
His heart became freer in that instance, and he realised that he WAS happy for XiChen.
Once he understood the separation of these two facts in his mind, he could feel a peaceful calmness in his mind.
They exchanged pleasantries and as the moments passed, Lan Zhan settled into a serene, content place in his mind now. The smile he offered to his brother was no longer tight, nor tense.
"Didi… I have some great news for you."
His brother is sounding far too optimistic and excited.
Lan Zhan doesn't have to say anything, for XiChen to give him a small, apologetic smile.
"Interesting news." He amends.
"Mn?"
"Huaisang is an adventurous fellow as you know. A-Jue was worried about him finding a person to spend the rest of his life with. A partner to share in times of joy and sorrow." XiChen sips from his cup.
Lan Zhan thinks this conversation has taken a nosedive off a short sword, but the love for his brother prevents him from cutting it short.
"He was taking a walk in Yiling, and he came across a marvellous young man, sitting in the middle of the market Square. The young man offered to paint him a portrait, and you know what A-sang is like… of course, he agreed. And then, he was shocked because the portrait he was given bore no resemblance to his own features! Isn't that amazing?" XiChen is practically vibrating in his seat.
"Is the artist perhaps blind?" Lan Zhan inquired. It was a reasonable question, given what he had been told.
"No! No…not at all. The artist said he had a gift of being able to draw the Soul Mate of anyone, no matter how old or young. He was constantly painting." XiChen was trembling with the strength of what he was feeling.
"Did it work?" Lan Zhan only asks because he feels obliged to.
"He has met with the person. Things are… looking good. So I think you should -"
"No."
"But Didi!" XiChen clutched his arm in desperation. "What if…what if -"
"No." Lan Zhan replies, more firmly this time.
XiChen sighs.
The sound is loud in the silent room.
"I kind of knew…that you would say that." He sounds resigned. His brow furrows, suddenly. "Didi… how easily that word falls from your lips. How easily you accept the hand dealt to you by Fate." He says bitterly. "But have you ever stopped to think about others? What about me? Do you ever think, this is someone who will be torn apart by grief, if something should happen to you?" His usually calm honey-coloured eyes are blazing with anger. "Won't you fight for your right to be happy? When will you take responsibility for yourself?"
He stands up and in that fiery rage, he leaves.
There is only the sound of the door slamming shut in the Jingshi, and the echoing silence that fills the space where he sat.
Lan Zhan is in shock.
XiChen has never spoken to him like that. Never raised his voice to the exemplary child taught to value perfection.
Lan Zhan finds his hand is trembling as he reaches for his cup of tea.
He tries to meditate afterwards, because his mind will not settle. His brother's voice is constant background noise in his head, his words echoing like a stone thrown into a canyon.
He sleeps poorly, waking up in spurts of panic. Tossing and turning did not help and sleep remains elusive.
It might be better to decipher what he is feeling, instead of trying to rest when the latter seems impossible.
He felt indignant at first; because what was his striving for, if not for the betterment of his clan? How was that selfish of him? The anger is slow to come to his defence, and then as the first of the sun's rays gradually drift in through the huge round window, he feels his resistance slowly melting away like early morning frost.
What did he have to lose?
If he stayed here in Gusu, there would be nothing here except cruel words and a lack of understanding for his feelings. Added to that would be blame for not even trying to change his situation.
If he went away with a good excuse like this, and a suggestion from his brother, no less… because his brother told him to take responsibility for his own life, then maybe something good could come out of it.
At the very least, he could do with a change in scenery.
************
Hours later, Lan Zhan leaves a note in the Jingshi for whoever wished to know where he was going. Yiling was six hours away by foot and easily a few hours by sword flight.
He thought it would be a good idea to spend some time with himself.
No sword forms, no writing, no nighthunts, just focusing on the path ahead. It was meditative to simply concentrate on his breathing as he flew, and he came to realise that he was unintentionally cultivating by doing this.
Thus, by the time he landed in Yiling, he jumped off his sword like a new man, feeling refreshed and rejuvenated.
The scent of adventure was in the air, mingling with cooking aromas, and burning wood. Lan Zhan was looking forward to this.
It came as a surprise to him, too.
For once, he did not know what was going to happen, he had no idea how today was going to end, and there was a sense of exhilaration to be had, to blindly venture forth into unpredictability.
Yiling was a busy town.
Lan Zhan followed the crowds as they wandered at a meandering speed, rather like a newly thawing stream wandering down the mountains in Gusu. Yiling lay closer to sea level and therefore was a warmer climate than Cloud Recesses.
Lan Zhan liked the way the sunlight kissed his face, almost as if it was welcoming him home. It reminded him of his mother.
Her love for him felt like a tangible thing, a boat in a sea of trouble. Her warm kisses on his forehead felt full of kindness and love, and when he was small, it felt as if that was all he would ever need.
He hadn't felt her presence for more than twenty years…how odd to sense her here in this strange town, so far away from home.
Someone is baking bread, and the fragrance awakens his dormant hunger.
How long ago was the last time he had experienced hunger?
Nowadays, he ate when it was time to eat, regardless of whether he had an appetite or not.
Lan Zhan finds a restaurant nearby and he is lucky to be seated at the last table.
He places an order for plain rice and steamed vegetables, and freshly brewed green tea. While his waiter goes to fetch the order, another waiter comes along with a person waiting behind him. Lan Zhan cannot see the other person clearly, yet.
"Kind sir, please might we make a request?" At Lan Zhan’s nod, he goes on to say that as Lan Zhan is sitting on his own, opposite an empty chair, would he mind if someone sat there?
Lan Zhan is on edge about this, but he thinks if the person is hungry, even one half of his own hunger, then of course, he doesn't mind. He will just keep to himself, and hopefully the stranger will respect his wishes by keeping silent at the table.
So he nods.
Immediately, the seat in front of him fills with an extraordinary beauty.
In fact, to say that, to use such ordinary words is a crime.
This person has silver eyes made from the very stars in the night sky; he has a lovely face, full of kindness and an openness that Lan Zhan hasn't seen in a long time. His hair is a wild mess of curls tied up in a high ponytail, a vibrant red ribbon with a life of its own. His cheeks are round and squishable…Lan Zhan gets the sudden and inexplicable urge to poke them.
This close to him, Lan Zhan sees a dusting of freckles on his cute button nose, and then…there are his full, pink lips, the shape of which Lan Zhan would like to taste.
He feels reckless and wild and wonders what is wrong with him? Why does he suddenly feel too hot? Warm all over, as if he was suffering from a fever.
The beautiful man sitting opposite him seems to be uncomfortable too, squirming in his seat and loosening his robes, which weren't all that tight to begin with.
Lan Zhan lowers his gaze immediately, his ears heating up at the sight of a delectable collarbone, sculpted to perfection.
He wants to bite it.
"They're very busy today." The beautiful man says, looking around. "Sorry about having to sit here; there's really nowhere else to sit."
Did he mean that if there was, he would rather sit elsewhere? Rather than here? Lan Zhan is upset by that comment.
He would rather not examine it right now.
"But, if I had to pick something nice to look at while I eat, then it'd probably be here." He says.
His smile takes Lan Zhan’s breath away.
"So…I haven't seen you around these parts before. Are you passing through?" He asks.
Lan Zhan thinks that if he tried to speak in the following seconds, he might trip up over his own tongue. Nodding is far safer, so that's what he does.
The beautiful stranger starts playing with the chopsticks they will use for their meal, when it arrives.
"My name is Wei WuXian. But you can call me Wei Ying." His smile seems even brighter suddenly.
"Lan Zhan." Lan Zhan is just relieved that his name left his lips intact.
"Lan Zhan…." He breathes out.
It's a nice feeling to hear his name…one that is not used by anyone else, be said by his delightful voice.
Uncle Qiren calls him WangJi, and XiChen says that, or calls him Didi. It seems apt…right for this nearness to be gifted to this lovely person.
"We probably won't meet again, if that's the case." The beautiful man looks sad.
"Does Wei Ying live here?" Lan Zhan asks him, thanking his lucky stars that his tongue has loosened up.
"Yep. Grew up in Yiling. You? Where do you come from?"
"Gusu."
Their food arrives and then the next few moments are spent eating and drinking.
But then, Wei Ying starts to chat about anything and everything.
His voice is pleasant and melodious to listen to, and Lan Zhan chews carefully, his attention wholly on every little gesture, every time Wei Ying tucks a loose hair behind his ear, it is noted.
He looks to be about Lan Zhan’s age, and is interesting in a wholesome way.
Lan Zhan is content to simply listen to him. When his chopsticks come up empty, clinking against the ceramic bowl, that's when he realises that the time passed far quicker than he expected.
Wei Ying is drinking wine with his meal, and finishing off the second jar after his meal is over.
"Are you going to be staying long, Gege?" Wei Ying asks him, watching him through impossibly long lashes. They curl against his cheeks like the wings of a butterfly.
Lan Zhan feels as if Wei Ying has bewitched him somehow, that by sitting together and sharing a meal, Lan Zhan has succumbed to whatever spell Wei Ying has cast over him.
"My older brother asked me to visit Yiling." He confides.
"Really? Why?"
Lan Zhan doesn't want to say it out loud. Even to his ears, it sounds lame, that he is looking for help.
"Look at me! You can just tell me to mind my own business, Gege. I've been told often enough that I don't know when to shut up." Wei Ying blushes, resting his chin on one hand, and staring up at him.
"I am looking for someone." Lan Zhan confides in him.
"Is that so? Who? If they live in Yiling…well, it's not that big of a town. I might even know who it is." He encourages.
"I have a problem…and only that person can help." Lan Zhan adds.
"Well, I wish you every success in finding him. As for me, I have to go and visit friends now. But Gege…"
Wei Ying waits until Lan Zhan is looking at him, before he continues.
"I'm glad to have met you." He says simply, standing up and bowing, and after it is reciprocated, he leaves.
Lan Zhan misses him immediately.
He is also glad to have met Wei Ying.
The waiter presents him with the bill for both their meals, and Lan Zhan wants to think of it as paying for entertainment as opposed to the food. He feels happy instead of upset at being conned.
He leaves the restaurant and walks around the town. When he reaches the market Square, he has to ask around about the painter, and the stall keepers tell him that the painter does not return in the afternoon of a Wednesday but that he'll be back tomorrow morning.
Nine o'clock comes too fast, and Lan Zhan stays in an Inn for the night. He sleeps much better than the previous night, and bright and early in the morning, he receives a butterfly from Cloud Recesses.
His brother is proud of him, and tells him to take as much time as he wishes.
This painter is his last hope, Lan Zhan thinks, letting melancholy settle in his shoulders. Any way he looks at it, he doesn't have long to go.
************
There's a big oak tree in the centre of the Market Square, and Lan Zhan sits under its shade, while he waits for the painter to arrive.
It's another beautiful day, and again, it's the return of the comforting sunshine which makes Lan Zhan close his eyes and enjoy it.
Being here, in the midst of energy, while there is so much activity around him, it makes him feel alive.
When he next opens his eyes, he sees Wei Ying sitting next to him.
"Good afternoon." Wei Ying says, brightly. "You looked far too beautiful and peaceful for me to disturb you, Gege. I'll be honest with you, I was not expecting to see you this quickly." He giggles.
It makes the hairs on the back of his neck stand up.
And then, even while Lan Zhan watches him, he opens up a contraption that turns into an easel. He has several pots of dry ingredients and a gourd of water with a heating talisman.
Lan Zhan cannot believe his eyes!
This is his painter!
Wei Ying is the painter.
The coincidence is too big for him to ignore, so Lan Zhan decides to simply watch him for a few moments.
There is a young woman standing in front of him, shyly looking at Wei Ying, and then her eyes skitter away.
"How may I help you, Guniang?" Wei Ying smiles at her.
Lan Zhan doesn't want to be jealous, but he feels as if he's drunk a bottle of vinegar for breakfast.
"Are you the Yiling Laozu?" She asks, fluttering her lashes.
Wei Ying remains unaffected. He carries on smiling politely, nodding.
"Then please, could you find my Soul Mate?" Her tone is now pleading.
"Sure. Take a seat. Before we begin, I will need a single drop of your blood." He tells her.
Lan Zhan is now even more interested in whatever Wei Ying is doing. He's never heard of anything like this before.
Wei Ying lights a candle and heats up the tip of a long needle. She offers up her hand and Wei Ying takes her hand gently. He begins to talk to distract her, so when he actually pierces her tender skin and squeezes out a drop, it lands on his mixing palette and she hasn't even noticed.
Wei Ying takes another needle and does the same on his own thumb. This time when the needle draws his blood, his eyes flash from silver to red to silver again, and all throughout, Wei Ying maintains a steady stream of chit-chat.
Some of his colours are just dry and adding the heated water renders them usable once more.
And then Wei Ying begins to paint.
His brushes are flying over the parchment paper on his easel, and Lan Zhan watches in amazement as slowly, the image of a person takes shape right in front of his eyes.
An hour later, and it is ready.
Wei Ying takes the painting off the easel and hands it to her.
The young lady gasps and there are tears in her eyes.
"Do you know this person?" Wei Ying asks her.
"Yes. He lives opposite my brother's home in the next town over. I shall be going to visit him soon." She pulls out a bag of silver pieces and leaves it in his bag even when Wei Ying protests.
And the moment she leaves, she is replaced by a middle aged man.
Lan Zhan watches as person after person comes to ask Wei Ying for help. Sometimes people pay him and sometimes they don't, and Wei Ying departs each one with a smile and a never-ending kindness.
They take a break at lunchtime, and Wei Ying invites him for the meal, this time at another place.
Like yesterday, Wei Ying carries the conversation and Lan Zhan is content to listen only.
But now, he is in two minds.
Does he really want to know who his Soul Mate is?
Five years ago, eight years ago…his answer would have been a resounding yes. But now? And especially after meeting Wei Ying, Lan Zhan was terrified.
Part of him was scared if his Soul Mate was someone other than Wei Ying…what would Lan Zhan do then?
He must face this: such an extraordinary attraction towards this beautiful person, and right out of the blue…what else is he supposed to think?
And now that push had come to shove…was he brave enough?
The day ended, and Lan Zhan was no closer to finding any answers.
When Wei Ying was packing away his things after sending the last ones away, Lan Zhan blurted out, "They're all so brave."
Wei Ying nodded.
"I guess it comes down to what's better for them. What do they want more? Sometimes, even after doing all this, even after finding out what their Soul Mate looks like, some of them chicken out. These portraits are just as likely gathering dust in some corner as being wall mounted and shown off." He says, standing up.
"Then why do you do it?" Lan Zhan has had this burning question inside him since the morning.
"I wanted to help people." He says, with a wave.
Lan Zhan watches him walk away.
************
All night, Lan Zhan tossed and turned. In the morning, he made his decision.
Today, he was going to be Wei Ying’s first customer.
Knowing was definitely going to be better than not knowing, he thought.
It took all day for him to pluck up the courage to say the words.
He watched people come by, have their portraits painted and be replaced by the next person…and hours went by.
Wei Ying was once more packing up for the day, and Lan Zhan opened his mouth.
"Paint for me. Please." He adds.
Wei Ying’s eyes widened in shock.
"My Xiongzhang sent me to find you." Lan Zhan tells him everything. "My family thinks I'm not doing enough to prevent my death."
"Death?" Wei Ying says, shocked.
"Mn. I must find my Soul Mate by my next birthday. Otherwise…"
"How long do you have to go?" Wei Ying asks him, when he is able to form the words.
"We are nearing the end of October…my birthday is in January." Lan Zhan says. He's feeling jittery already. "And I'm scared I'm going to lose my courage…"
"Well…we can't have that, can we, Gege?" Wei Ying blinks back tears.
Lan Zhan doesn't want to ask what they mean, why Wei Ying seems just as upset as himself.
"Come on, then. Take a seat, Gege." Wei Ying opens up his easel once more.
Lan Zhan watches him fix a parchment paper to it, as he sits down.
He steels himself to feel the prick of the hot needle, and then there's something satisfying, something so right, about Wei Ying mixing his own blood with Lan Zhan’s blood.
But then, Wei Ying pales.
Lan Zhan knows something is wrong.
Something is terribly wrong…
Tears fill those beautiful eyes, and Wei Ying doesn't do anything to wipe them away. His eyes reflect regret, and a deep sadness.
Lan Zhan gets up so fast, the stool he was sitting on tumbles to the ground.
Suddenly, he knows why Wei Ying looks like that.
Lan Zhan does not have a Soul Mate.
There is no one in the world for him…and three months from now, Lan Zhan will die.
*********
Wei Ying was not prepared.
When he couldn't lift his trusty brush, he looked at the too familiar painting palette and saw their blood had disappeared.
And that's when he knew.
It takes him back to a long, long time ago.
Playing in these streets as a kid, and then one day, a kind old lady took pity on him.
She took him to her home, way up in the Burial Mounds.
It took him a long time to understand that this was no ordinary home, and she was no ordinary grandmother.
She was a witch.
Wei Ying became a sort of apprentice to her, and when he finished five years of looking after her by collecting herbs and plants she needed, translating coded texts for her, and generally being as useful as he could be, she granted him a wish.
"If you could have one thing in the world, what would it be?" She asks him, one day.
Wei Ying is not expecting anything, and he takes time to think about what she's asking him.
"I would like to make people happy." He says, smiling brightly.
At this moment, he's scrubbing her counter, readying it for the preparation of the next batch of potions.
"Come here!" She says, sharply. When Wei Ying is standing in front of her, she takes him by the shoulders and looks deeply into his eyes.
Wei Ying is scared.
"Did you mean it?!" She demands fiercely.
He's too frightened to lie, so he nods quickly.
"Out of all the children…" She murmurs to herself. "Very well. But it comes at a price. Are you willing to pay for it?"
Wei Ying nods again, shocked by this rapid change in a person he has become quite fond of. In all of their time together, he has never given her cause to raise her voice against him, and while he was aware that she was a mischievous person, she had always been kind to him.
Now though, looking into her bottomless eyes, he can see an ancient power slowly revealing itself.
He understands that her kindness up until now was a gift; when she could have ended him at any second.
It is a thread of gold that rises up from the depths of her soul, to wrap around the iris of her eyes.
She takes his hands in hers, glancing at them first before piercing him with her intensity.
"These hands that served me well, let them serve those that need help. You will paint, and help people find their other halves."
Wei Ying remembers nodding, excited by the prospect of being able to do that.
"But Grandmother, what is the price?" He asked cautiously.
"When you find your own Soul Mate, you will no longer be able to use your gift for yourself. It will fail you when you most need it. And, you will not be able to tell him why."
***************