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Xue Yang is working late in the kitchen, perfecting his no-dye black frosting, when Mo Xuanyu bursts in with some news. Or tries to, anyway - he stops abruptly at the open door like a ghost at a border of salt or one of those steps that old Chinese houses have.
"I'm not sure this is going to work out, actually. How am I supposed to eat?" He grouses.
Xue Yang doesn't dignify him with a response. It's not like they didn't discuss this at length or as though he could alter the cottage industry food preparation safety rules. Luckily, Xuanyu does know this and also is actually a very sweet person, so he just sighs.
By the time Xue Yang turns to him, he's already brightened up again.
"So, anyway, Yangyang, remember that big regular weekend market I told you about? The one in the nice area that's always really busy?"
"Uh, I'm not sure, let me think... Would that be the one you've been talking about non-stop for the past six weeks? Yeah, I remember." Xue Yang rolls his eyes.
He should be nice, because Xuanyu has done the brunt of work when it comes to finding them opportunities to sell their wares. Then again, technically his brother owns the lion's share of their business, so he should be doing the work. Besides, his flowers grow by themselves, whereas Xue Yang's cupcakes definitely need his input.
Xuanyu seems oblivious to his snark. Well, he's used to it. Also, Xue Yang notices, he's practically vibrating with excitement. It looks a little ridiculous on somebody in a full goth outfit. Endearing, though, too.
"Well, we're in! We only have to pay the market rent, then we can start next week."
Xue Yang puts down the bowl, so he can give Xuanyu his full attention. "I thought they already had too many flower stalls and too many bakery stalls."
"But no flower and bakery stall, I guess." Xuanyu shrugs and cranes his head. "What is that, by the way? Is that edible?"
"It's black cocoa." Xue Yang replies automatically, his mind still on Xuanyu's explanation. Something seems off here - the reason why they suddenly got an in at the super popular market sounds suspiciously weak.
Did Meng Yao pull some strings again? Probably. Funny how much easier everything is when you have deep pockets.
Still, Xue Yang wouldn't have cared if Meng Yao had murdered to get them in and is actually pleased, too. He's not going to admit that, though.
So he only says: "Cool. We should check out the competition."
"Well, don't get too excited."
Xuanyu actually sounds disappointed, so Xue Yang hands him one of his latest attempts at a black velvet cupcake by way of an apology.
"Anyway, I've done all the research about the markets and you're hogging the kitchen, so you can check out the competition, if you think it's necessary. The market has a website, most vendors are on there", Xuanyu says, his mouth full, before disappearing into the hallway with the rest of the cupcake.
"Fine, I will!" Xue Yang calls after him, then looks around and groans.
The buttercream is a shiny, deep, perfect black, and as Xuanyu, his guinea pig, just demonstrated, does not stain your teeth. Which is great. Unfortunately though, the kitchen looks like a crime scene and Xue Yang is exhausted. He can't even listen to music, because he left his phone in his room and he's covered in flour, cocoa, grease...
"Yangyang." Xuanyu is suddenly back, hovering in the open door. He looks tired, too, Xue Yang notices. Maybe those flowers don't quite grow by themselves.
"Just... Don't do anything stupid when checking out the competition, alright?"
He's disappeared again before Xue Yang has a chance to ask what on earth he means. Brat. When has Xue Yang ever done anything stupid in his life?
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Xue Yang's in bed and should be sleeping, not leaving fake reviews on the world wide web, but what can you do? Money and evil never sleep, either.
Okay, maybe evil is a little strong. The market doesn't seem to have any pie stalls that looks like they're run by the demon barber of Fleetstreet (though, Xue Yang notes with interest that there is a stall called Demonic Vegetables, that actually looks good).
Some of these vendors, however... Let's just say Xue Yang is sure they deserve the two star reviews he's leaving using various aliases (one star is too suspicious).
This includes the most boring, generic flower stall he's ever seen (well, no, actually it's exactly like every flower stall he's ever seen) and a sourdough pizza and bread outfit called the Dough Bros, which actually looks fine, but the name is dumb. Anyway, he doesn't tolerate any rivals. Never mind that he only sells cupcakes. At least dough hoes is actually a catchy insult.
One other cake stall called Granny Wen's seems to actually be run by an old lady, so he can't very well slag her off too much, but he does give her enterprise two stars. One bad review will only add spice to her sugary profile. She should be grateful, really.
He should have stopped there, Xue Yang knows, but he can't help himself. He has to give himself (and Xuanyu, of course), the best possible chance at success. He really doesn't want to be back on the job market come fall.
Still, he ignores most vendors, simply because there's too many and their online presence is so bland, he can't even engage. And in the case of the Meat Realm, because Nie Mingjue is an acquaintance of Meng Yao's. They may no longer be friends, but it's best to be cautious. The last thing he wants is to get on Meng Yao's bad side.
Then, just as he's ready to call it a night, he finds an easy victim. The business is called Bright Moon Arts and Craft.
The "art and craft" in question, though, oh boy... Think "whimsical" porch rocks and Buzzfeed's 29 worst craft project ideas, and dial it up by a hundred.
Why is a professional and allegedly popular market allowing this kind of junk to be sold? Admittedly, Xue Yang can't speak to the quality of it all, but in terms of aesthetics, it sits somewhere between haunted house and elementary school project, with a side of earnestness that is evident even online, which is at least a little impressive.
Unfortunately for Bright Moon, it's like blood in the water to Xue Yang's inner shark. He makes no attempt to mince his words. Although, because he's not a total asshole (at least, Jiangzai, the online profile he's using here, isn't; that doesn't convince people), he does end it on a lighter note. Suggesting the whimsical porch rock comes alive at night shouldn't deter serious customers, if they even exist, but, if you looked at the rocks in question, it might actually be a PSA.
Satisfied, he finally logs out and turns off the light.
He's going to make this venture work and if it's the last thing he'll do. He's not even sure why it's so important to him.
Xue Yang's fail lord days are over.
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A week or so later, Xue Yang is busy arranging black velvet cupcakes in an enticing pattern, which is why he doesn't really pay attention to his surroundings. He's only vaguely aware of Xuanyu working beside him, putting out the flowers. It's only once their wares are displayed to both their satisfaction and Xue Yang has put up the sign with the name of their enterprise - Sweet / Vicious - that he notices how crowded it has gotten already.
It probably shouldn't come as a surprise - it's a sunny Saturday morning in late spring, in a very middle-class, residential area. But they're fairly new to the farmer's market slash arts and craft fair circuit, after all, and frankly the last places they've been to weren't half as busy. So the hype around this market was true, after all.
In fact, the whole thing is a bit of a miracle. Not today so much; all of it.
Xue Yang had already given up on his ambition of opening a bakery or earning money through his baking unless he worked for somebody else. Well, technically he still does work for somebody else, but he's at least a co-founder and stakeholder in their business. A business that had only come about because Meng Yao finally gained a foothold in his father's company, and wanted to provide Xuanyu with at least the semblance of a respectable career. And Xuanyu didn't want to go it alone.
It turned out that Xuanyu, who once grew pot in his aunt and uncle's basement, still has a green thump. As a goth for life, he's found his niche: dark flowers.
According to the labels, today's variety are almost black queen of the night tulips and a dark purple rose evocatively called "Twilight Zone".
Now, Xue Yang knows that a lot of people find cupcakes and flowers a rather basic combination, but one, he doesn't really give a shit, and two, they have precisely that slightly darker vibe going on that sets them apart.
Glancing around, Xue Yang thinks they should in fact be doing pretty well, their stall stands out in a good way.
That said, he's is weirdly stressed and desperate for a coffee. He hasn't really found his routine yet and isn't going to bed early enough. Luckily, he sees a coffee stall that is close enough so he can just run over.
"I'll be right back," he tells Xuanyu, who pulls a face, clearly stressed himself.
"Come on," Xue Yang whines. "I've had about three hours sleep. I'll work better caffeinated."
"So why didn't you have a coffee before coming out? Or went to bed earlier?" Xuanyu pouts, but ultimately nods. "Fine, but make it quick, please? I can't handle a crowd on my own either today."
Xue Yang nods and heads off swiftly. When he turns back, just before reaching the coffee stall, though, there's not a single person at Sweet / Vicious. Maybe they were both overly optimistic in their anxiety. They clearly don't have a customer base yet.
Still, Xue Yang is confident their wares will speak for themselves.
Unfortunately but unsurprisingly, the coffee stall does have a queue. It looks slow-moving, too. Xue Yang stands for a second, shifting restlessly from one foot to the other. He's just about to join the queue, anyway - what does it matter if Xuanyu is alone at their stall if no one wants to buy anything? - when he turns and sees a little group headed towards Sweet / Vicious.
He knows the sensible thing to do would be to either to just abandon the idea of coffee (it's not like he'll die without it) and go back or alternatively, just accept that Xuanyu can only do so much on his own and they may lose some business. It won't make that much difference in the great scheme of things. If any.
Being sensible is for losers, though.
Xue Yang by-passes the queue, cutting smoothly yet decisively in front of the first person, some tall guy he doesn't really look at.
He does quickly ask over his shoulder: "Sorry, I have to get back to my stall quickly, you don't mind if I cut in, do you?" Then he places his order without waiting for an answer.
The guy selling the coffee stares at him, but seems to decide it's not worth an argument.
The guy behind him doesn't say anything at all, but there are several people grumbling further down the queue. Xue Yang fixes the loudest person with a stare and their protest dies down quickly enough. He just about manages to suppress his grin, though, since he doesn't actually want to get punched right now. That would slow him down.
Annoyingly, he still has to wait for his coffee to be made (he should change his beverage of choice, a latte is a slow-ass drink). Even more annoyingly, the barista is the type who collects orders and makes them in a batch, perhaps to placate the guy who'd actually been first in line.
It gives Xue Yang a chance to actually take him in properly. Not that he's interested.
He's really not, but on closer inspection the guy is... unnervingly good-looking. He's East Asian, too, around Xue Yang's age. He's tall and willowy, with a young-looking, perfectly symmetrical face, a pointy chin like a fox, but full lips with a pretty cupid's bow, high cheekbones and lovely eyes. He's looking coolly out at the market from the vantage point of his height, ignoring both Xue Yang and the grumbling queue.
He's not exactly intimidating, but with his good looks and that expression, Xue Yang is not sure he'd have pushed past him, had he noticed it before. It's just as well that he didn't notice then, really.
He becomes aware that he's staring - possibly drooling, fuck - so he turns away to finally take his coffee.
The other guy's drink is also ready. Since he'd clearly been oblivious to Xue Yang and the world, he now reaches serenely for his thermos cup. At the same time, Xue Yang, distracted and rushed, reaches for his own paper cup. He collides with him, knocking over a hot drink.
Spilling it all over the counter, the ground and himself. It's hot enough that he hisses in pain, although luckily his clothes bear the brunt of it.
It's the guy's drink - Matcha latte, by the looks of it.
Somebody in the queue laughs at his misfortune. If Xue Yang had time or brain space, he'd do something about it, but he hasn't got either. He just swears loudly as he pointlessly wipes at his clothes with his hand and sleeve, while also readying himself for the inevitable attack from the pretty guy.
"You shouldn't laugh, he could have hurt himself", somebody says, reproachfully and confusingly. Then, suddenly, a hand is thrust into Xue Yang's line of vision, elegant long fingers holding a bunch of tissues.
"Here. Did you get hurt? It's not so bad otherwise. Look, your coffee is fine."
Bewildered, Xue Yang looks up, into the face of the pretty guy. He's smiling, with apparently genuine friendliness, no longer looking so unnerving. He's also pointing. Xue Yang follows his finger. It's true. His own drink still sits there, fragrant and steaming.
He grabs it, but still waits for the other shoe to drop. Why is the guy not screaming in his face and demanding a new drink, as would be the normal thing to do? Especially given how Xue Yang behaved just minutes ago.
Pretty guy picks up his now empty thermos, while the annoying people in the queue have just started ordering again. At least he's no longer the center of attention.
It occurs to Xue Yang that maybe the guy expects him to be nice in return. He'd have a point, but being nice is just not part of Xue Yang's repertoire. Not even to his customers. While he knows full well he should buy the guy a new drink, he's wasted enough time.
"Sorry", he presses out, going for minimal effort and ignoring the proffered tissues.
The pretty guy is still smiling. Normally it would just piss Xue Yang off. It's a sweet open smile, though, the kind that is rarely aimed at him. He doesn't know what to do.
"No worries," the guy says. "I guess the universe just didn't want me to have caffeine today. Enjoy your drink."
He seems to get the message that Xue Yang won't take the tissues, at least, and puts them carefully back into the box on the counter. Out of the corner of his eye, Xue Yang sees the barista glare at them, but he can't focus, still processing what he's just heard.
"Are you sure? If the universe was involved, it probably meant for my coffee to be spilled. It usually does the exact opposite of whatever I want."
The words are already out before Xue Yang realizes just what kind of inane bullshit he's spouted. He can feel his cheeks heat up.
Pretty boy just laughs. "You're funny. Anyway, guess it's your lucky day then."
He winks or tries to - he ends up blinking with both eyes like a sleepy owl.
The duality between his extremely beautiful but slightly bitchy face and his sweet, dorky demeanor is giving Xue Yang whiplash, leaving him seriously off his game. Not that he's even sure what game he's playing here.
He can only stare in consternation as the guy turns away, then back again. "I've got a stall here, too, so I'll see you around! It's Bright Moon arts and crafts."
Then he walks off, as if he hadn't just dropped a bombshell.
Xue Yang takes a big, steadying sip off coffee, before he finally hurries back to Sweet / Vicious. Xuanyu is alone again, hardly a thing sold, but he looks at him accusingly anyway.
Xue Yang's got a queasy feeling in his stomach that he can't explain.
The encounter was embarrassing, annoying and maybe a little funny, but that's all. Perhaps other people would feel guilty for being horrible, times two. Horrible, squared. Xue Yang has no time or energy for any of that.
"What took you so long? And why are you covered in green gunk? Did you fall into a pond on the way? You should clean up, it'll scare off customers if you look like you've got gangrene."
"Why would I look like I have gangrene?" Xue Yang asks, choosing to ignore the other questions. "Gangrene isn't green, you little idi..."
He trails off, since Xuanyu looks a little wounded. Maybe Xue Yang is a little mean and he really thought it was gangreene. In spite of everything, Xue Yang has to bite back a smile at that. Say what you will about Mo Xuanyu, but he's a sweetie.
"Aw, didi, don't worry. One day, you'll be old and wise, like your elders and betters."
Xuanyu snorts at that and elbows Xue Yang in the ribs, but he's smiling again, too. Xue Yang uses this moment of truce to inhale the rest of his coffee.
A woman comes up to them to buy some flowers then and afterwards Xue Yang does actually sell some cupcakes, so at least things are going well enough, even if the day is not exactly an overwhelming success.
Xue Yang doesn't even think about his weird encounter with Bright Moon or anything else much. Not until things get quiet again in the afternoon and Xuanyu leans over.
"Isn't that the guy who's in that photo with you? The one from culinary school?"
Xue Yang has no idea what guy or photo he's talking about and after his earlier embarrassment, he's deliberately not looked around too much. Plus, it was busy. Now he looks to where Xuanyu is jerking is head to: The street food stall opposite them.
Xue Yang wonders why he's not noticed it before. It's not huge or flashy, but it has a nice, clean, simple look to it and an enticing smell wafts over.
Well, of course it's enticing, he's not really had a chance to eat much and is running on caffeine and sugar, mostly, but what else is new?
He's just about to ask Xuanyu what the hell he's on about, anyway, but his spider sense is suddenly tingling. Just then, the man behind the counter leans over to hand something to a customer. He's tall and pale and aloof-looking and dressed in neat black clothes that look almost like a uniform. He's also very familiar.
Xue Yang can't suppress a groan before bursting out: "Fuck my life, what is he doing here?"
"Shh", Xuanyu hisses. "You're scaring away the customers."
Rude, but he might have a point. Xue Yang glances around, but luckily no prospective customers seem to have heard him swearing.
Unfortunately though, his problem remains. His problem being the street food stall or, more precisely, the guy who runs it.
"So you do know him, then? He's really good-looking in person", Xuanyu muses. He's lucky that a customer comes up to him just then.
The man who runs that street food stall is handsome - tall, model-like, all of that. He's also indeed very familiar: Song Lan, Xue Yang's nemesis from culinary school.
Xue Yang didn't lie when he was talking to Bright Moon. The universe really hates him.
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It only takes Xue Yang and Xuanyu a couple of weeks to settle into their spot at the market, which is really both farmer's market and arts and crafts fair. Though fairly new to the circuit in general, they are already able to recognize quite a few of the other regular stallholders, too.
Today, it's Saturday again and Xue Yang is looking around.
There's Demonic Vegetables, which turned out to be run by a cool guy called Wei Ying and specializes in extra spicy peppers, sharp radishes, pickles and so on, though the man himself is nowhere to be seen. Instead, Wen Ning is manning the stall. He's a nice guy, but Xue Yang can't think of why he wouldn't do anything else with his weekends - he's a terrible salesman, whether he helps Wei Ying or his grandmother.
He also spots Nie Huaisang, Nie Mingjue's brother, who's a PhD student, but who helps out at the Meat Realm every so often, and Luo Mianmian, who sells handmade soaps. And unfortunately, right across from them...
"Of course, he's here again, too. Can't he take a week off? I can't believe I missed him on the website," Xue Yang mutters darkly.
"I still don't know what your problem is with him. His food is great and he's kind of quiet, but always pleasant when I buy something."
Xuanyu has finished putting out their wireless payment system and their little old-fashioned cash box and seems totally oblivious to Xue Yang's accusing stare.
"Traitor. I told you not to bring him business."
"Well, he was the only one who had a vegetarian option at that other market last week. Though I'm not sure how that was even possible." Xuanyu shudders at the memory.
Xue Yang shrugs, momentarily distracted from the enemy. "Well, it was an actual meat market."
He has to snicker at the term. Xuanyu gives him a sidelong glance.
"How old are you? Twelve? Anyway, we were there and we don't sell meat. So my expectations weren't that unrealistic."
Xue Yang just shrugs again.
It's true that they're kind of doing everything right now to get themselves out there, see what works, get people interested. Hopefully they can save money and grow enough as a business that Meng Yao will one day be the seed investor for their first actual store. At least that's Xue Yang's hope. He should probably discuss it with Xuanyu.
But not right now. Right now, he's staring at Song Lan's stall, which offers wonton soup today. The savory scent wafts over again, overpowering the sweet, but delicate aroma of the cupcakes and flowers. It's annoying, really. Not to mention, it might affect their business. Xue Yang should complain, make him move places.
It's also annoying that Xuanyu nevertheless has a point. Song Lan's food is good as well as affordable. That's no reason to eat it, though.
Song Lan and Xue Yang just never got on, okay? Song Lan is too tall, too perfect, too bland, too square, too infuriating. You name it.
It goes both ways - Song Lan hates Xue Yang, too. Maybe even more.
Okay, so maybe they hooked up once or twice. Maybe Xue Yang also ruined an important practical exam for Song Lan. What can he say? He was young and stupid back then, and the industry is cut-throat. Surreptitiously blowing chili powder into Song Lan's eyes was still a low blow, he can admit that much now. What he can't do is apologize, though.
Besides, one of the hooks up was after. Hate sex, the kids would call it these days, Xue Yang presumes. Anyway, Song Lan should apologize, too, for ghosting him, once they were done fucking. So far, he's made no attempt to do that either. It doesn't help that the sex was actually pretty fantastic.
In any case, they now have no choice but to keep awkwardly bumping into each other.
He doesn't realize he's still staring until Song Lan suddenly looks over and meets his eye. The big guy frowns, because of course he does. Then he looks away. It's the normal, sensible thing to do, actually, so why does it leave Xue Yang feeling so... put out? He wants nothing from Song Lan, other than that the guy gets out of his face.
Xuanyu elbows him into the ribs then - turns out there's quite the queue. At least business has been slowly but steadily picking up. So for a while, Xue Yang focuses on work. Time flies by and they barely manage to go for a piss.
Today, Xue Yang has brought black forest cupcakes, red velvet cupcakes and strawberry cupcakes. Xuanyu's selection consists of more queen of the night tulips, black baccara roses and Xue Yang's personal favorite and the only one he'd have recognized by name, chocolate cosmos. After all, he loves all things sweet, so the characteristic scent of them is always a win. And for those who like to mix some light in with their dark, Xuanyu grudgingly brought along some bright pink Barcelona tulips and white, delicate androsace poetically named "Stardust".
The black forest cupcakes are unsurprisingly popular, but perhaps because of the season, the strawberry cupcakes are the crowd favorite today. By the time business slows as lunchtime approaches, they're sold out. Most of Xuanyu's roses are gone, too, and all of the tulips. They're left with the androsace and chocolate cosmos, which Xuanyu is now making into understated bouquets for the afternoon.
People have no taste, Xue Yang thinks, always going for the most obvious thing, but since he's now an entrepreneur (LOL), it won't do to disparage one's own customers.
Instead, he's using the lull to eat his lunch. He can't help but notice (not that he's keeping tabs) that Song Lan, whose stall is, if anything, busier than theirs, is taking a break, too. Instead, that girl (a-Qing, she's called, but who cares) has taken over. She looks 12 - he should report Song Lan for child labor violations - but Xue Yang has to admit, she's doing a good job.
Song Lan is sitting on a rug a little way to the right behind his stall, in the shade of a large tree, taking a sip of water. Even from the distance, Xue Yang can see how his throat works as he swallows. He quickly looks away. Not that Song Lan thinks he's got the hots for him.
"I should go say hi to Huaisang", Xuanyu says then, very casually. But when Xue Yang looks over at him, he's blushed so hard it's visible even underneath his thick make up.
"Uh-hu, sure, you go say 'hi'", Xue Yang starts, but before he can tease Xuanyu about his very obvious crush that he refuses to do anything constructive about, Xuanyu's eyes fall on something else.
A look somewhere between amusement and pity flashes across his face.
Xue Yang knows what - who - he's seen even before Xuanyu says: "Ah. Bright Moon is here, too."
Ah yes, Bright Moon. He of the absolutely terrible, useless merchandise, who Xue Yang both loves to see slightly across from them and feels very awkward about.
It's not that he is still embarrassed about the coffee cart encounter or that he feels guilty about the bad review - having seen the wares himself, that was totally justified.
It's just... from their brief interactions, Xue Yang has learned that all the (objectively ridiculous) objects are lovingly handmade by the man himself. What's maybe worse, the thing with the drink was no fluke. Bright Moon isn't just good-looking, but nice. He doesn't even seem to remember Xue Yang's rudeness, let alone hold it against him.
His name, Xue Yang has learned, is Xiao Xingchen. He, too, is new to the circuit. And, Xue Yang thinks now, not for the first time, he really shouldn't have quit the day job, which he has, judging from how often they bump each other.
While pretty much all the other stalls that Xue Yang can see have made a dent in their stock, Xingchen's display is almost untouched. He doesn't have any assistant or co-worker (obviously, how would he pay them?), so it's just him, sitting forlornly on a little folding chair. When he catches Xue Yang looking, he smiles his sweet smile though - a stark contrast to Song Lan's eternally grim visage.
Xue Yang waves, already putting down his lunch to go over and talk to him in spite of the awkwardness, when somebody promptly walks into his line of vision and starts talking to Xingchen instead. They're not close enough that Xue Yang could overhear the conversation, so he's left to stare dumbly at Song Lan's toned back, the lines of his muscles all too visible in the tank top he's wearing like the cocktease that he is.
"Aw, that's nice, he brought crafts guy some soup", Xuanyu comments while chewing his own lunch. "See? I told you, Song Lan's a nice guy. I mean, I don't know what exactly happened between you two at culinary school, but you have a tendency to-"
"Why are you still here? I thought you wanted to talk to Huaisang" Xue Yang interrupts, because the last thing he wants is for his kid friend to start psychoanalyzing him.
"I'm only three years younger than you. And don't you? I'm surprised, because you know what word you need to spell "psychoanalyze"? And if there's something you like-"
So Xue Yang must have thought out loud - definitely no Freudian slip - and Xuanyu thinks he's fucking hilarious.
"Now who's twelve? Anyway, if you don't finally go to that Nie guy and chat him up, then I will. And do something anal-"
"Shhh, there's customers around."
Weird, how they're only ever around when Xue Yang is talking. His strategy still works, though, at least Xuanyu gets up and saunters oh-so-casually over towards Nie Huaisang's stall.
Xue Yang would watch the show, but instead he finds himself looking over to Xingchen again. Song Lan is back working behind his own stall while Xingchen's now eating wonton soup and looking at least 35% happier than before. His cheeks are a little pink, which shouldn't look this cute on a grown man, and he glances shyly over to Song Lan's stall every so often.
Xue Yang has no skin in the game, but he doesn't like Song Lan sucking up to Xingchen. Plus, if he's totally honest, what with the spilled drink and all, he probably does owe him. He should do something about it, if only so he doesn't have to feel so weird around Xingchen anymore.
He contemplates his own stock. The red velvet cupcakes aren't selling that well today, but it's not because they're bad. He selects what he thinks is the prettiest of the leftover bunch (they're all pretty, he won't give any of them a complex). But he's kind of shot himself in the foot with his dastardly plan to get Xuanyu to hook up with Huaisang (or embarrass himself, whatever, practice makes perfect). He can't leave the stall unattended.
Before he can form any kind of plan, a well-dressed, indecisive couple come up to him and end up agonizing about the chocolate cosmos for ages. Then a group of hipster friends buy the rest of his black forest cupcakes. By the time Xuanyu finally comes back, annoyingly giggly and happy, there's a queue and they even have to explain to disappointed customers that they'll be back with more stock tomorrow.
It's almost two hours later when Xue Yang finally has a break again, just in time to pack up. Xuanyu is already emptying out the water of the now flower-less pots.
When Xue Yang glances over at Xingchen, he's mostly packed up, too. It's hard to tell, now that his wares are stored away, but to Xue Yang it seems like he's hardly sold a thing.
Xue Yang remembers the especially pretty cupcake that he's put safely away in the cool box and retrieves it.
"Back in a minute", he tells Xuanyu.
He doesn't wait for a reply, just pushes his way through the last meandering people. He's just in time; Xingchen's finished loading his boxes onto his cargo bike.
He hasn't seen him yet and there's no smile on his face right now, but he doesn't look angry, like Xue Yang would do, or bitchy, like he seemed at their first encounter. He just looks exhausted.
This close, he is also super attractive again, even though he dresses more like an actual granddad than one of the cool kids. But his hair is glossy, his skin glows. The large glasses he wears today only accentuate his almost otherworldly good looks. Xue Yang wonders briefly if it might actually scare some people off. Why isn't he modeling instead of trying to sell junk?
Then Xingchen spots him and that bright smile appears, making him look more approachable. It would give Xue Yang butterflies - perhaps it does, a little - but apart from everything else, he knows it's not for him. Xingchen smiles like that at anyone; as if everyone was his friend.
"A-Yang", he says happily, and the familiar address does something to Xue Yang, something he doesn't want to examine.
"I was just about to head off. You and your business partner had a good day, it seemed?"
Oh yeah. They're not really past the awkward, meaningless small-talk stage of their... Totally non-existent relationship. Well, they only met a couple of weeks ago and have spoken maybe four times, tops. Not that Xue Yang is counting.
Also, Xuanuy might be his business partner, but he's also Xue Yang's second-oldest friend (after Yao-ge), his roommate and kind of his ex. But Xingchen doesn't need to know any of that. Xue Yang hasn't even worked out if Xingchen is gay, yet. Not that it matters, either, even if he is attractive. Xue Yang knows he shouldn't hook up at work.
Anyway, the poor guy clearly wants to head off and Xue Yang is just standing there, gawking mutely.
He smiles his most winning smile to make up for it. "Yeah, it was an okay day. So anyway, I didn't sell all of my cupcakes and you know I can't keep them. They're great, though, really good. But I certainly can't eat any more, I dreamed I was drowning in cupcake frosting last night. So I was wondering if you'd like some dessert?"
Okay, that rambling speech wasn't Xue Yang's best attempt at being charming or apologetic (it might well be one of his worst), but, to quote the great Kim Namjoon: "Done is better than perfect".
At least he's made Xingchen laugh again. "That's really kind of you, a-Yang. But, uh..." He trails off.
To make the offer more enticing, Xue Yang holds up the cupcake; the sunlight's prettily illuminating the cream cheese frosting. Xingchen's eyes briefly light up, then he blinks as though uncertain, contemplating his packed cargo bike and their surroundings. Finally, he smiles at Xue Yang again. It looks a little strained, though.
"Thank you. But I can't really transport it very well and I couldn't eat it... I'm also still so full of soup. Besides, it does look amazing, perhaps you could still sell it..."
He gestures to the reusable containers from Song Lan's stall, which he was apparently about to drop back off, then at the cupcake.
Then his face suddenly lights up again.
"Oh! If you are so kind as to donate it, perhaps I could give it to Song Lan-gege? It would be a little circle of kindness, I guess, since he gave me some food. Only if you don't mind!" He adds quickly; perhaps Xue Yang isn't too good at hiding his thoughts, though he's trying.
Apart from everything else, "circle of kindness" is sending Xue Yang. Is Xingchen going to break out an acoustic guitar and sing Kumbaya next?
Xingchen meanwhile is looking around somewhat frantically, perhaps for inspiration. Then stills. When he speaks again next, his voice is shy.
"And, well, to complete that circle of kindness... I've packed up all my things, but if you're here tomorrow, maybe you'd like to pick something? It'll be a gift."
Xue Yang doesn't normally have problems being brutally honest. But Xingchen looks so hopeful, there's no way Xue Yang can say anything but yes. Besides, all his energy is used up in trying to keep a blank face. Now, he goes so far as to smile back, though he fears it's more of a grimace.
Xingchen is cute, he'll give him that, though Xue Yang still doesn't get his whole... thing.
"Sure. Sounds great. If you can spare anything. And feel free to pass the cupcake on to Song Lan, I hope..."
...it gives him indigestion. That he chokes on it. That it makes him think of me until he can't help but jerk off to my Instagram feed.
Uh. Wait, what?
Xingchen is still looking at Xue Yang expectantly.
"....he enjoys it", he finishes lamely. Xingchen beams and gets up to bustle over to Song Lan.
Xue Yang doesn't watch their interaction, but he's sure he can feel Song Lan's dark glare on him. The big guy probably doesn't even like cake. Or really thinks he wants to poison him; like Xue Yang is the evil stepmother and the cupcake is the apple. He'll probably throw away a perfectly good cupcake that they could have sold for a fiver at some upmarket bakery (What, seems expensive? Never heard of inflation? Or capitalism, for that matter?).
Song Lan might be in his back, but Xuanyu unfortunately isn't. He's not even trying to hide his amusement, Xue Yang's sure of it.
"Your face. What just happened? And why is he bringing the cupcake to Song Lan?"
"Shut up", Xue Yang mutters, feeling strangely off kilter. He tells himself it's merely disconcerting that Xuanyu is pulling with ease while he's fumbling a simple conversation.
Xuanyu is still giggling about it on the drive back. They're almost back when Xue Yang realizes that his fairy tale analogy made Song Lan Snow White. Which is ridiculous. That would obviously be Xingchen.
Would that make Song Lan the prince? Huh. Well, that fairy tale needs some rewriting, because Xue Yang-as-stepmother will not be left out of this little love triangle.
What is he thinking? It's obviously a stupid analogy and there is no love triangle. Sure, he wouldn't say no to hooking up with Xingchen if it actually came to it, seeing him at his place of work or not (trust him, no one would). But he's got no interest in Song Lan anymore. No matter how sculpted his back or how slutty his tank tops.
Besides, Xue Yang doesn't do love.
Even later, as Xue Yang is getting ready to go to bed, going through his new K-Beauty regimen (it might not even be 9pm, but bakers rise early), he can't help but remember Xingchen's tired and then hopeful face.
That smile. How he laughed at Xue Yang's stupid little joke. His hands with their long, slender fingers. Artist's hands. But the art or craft, uh...
Which begs the question: Why go through the stress and humiliation of sitting behind a market stall for hours on end, several days a week (he's seen him at other events, too), when you've clearly got nothing that sells? What on earth is that guy's deal?
And, although Xue Yang was in the right at the time, no one must every find out who wrote Jiangzai's review.
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If anything, the next day is busier, perhaps because it's a Sunday and the weather is still nice. Although it's clearly not summer yet and there's a cold wind blowing, so Xue Yang has to actually put up the hood of his black hoodie and hope it doesn't scare away any of their more conservative customers.
Then again, when did he become so conformist and desperate, not too mention materialistic? If people don't like their more edgy style (if you could even call it that, given what they're selling), they can piss right off.
Only, Xue Yang is ambitious, actually. A childhood of being told you'll never amount to anything can do that to a person, especially once they're finally given their shot at worldly success. And as to the materialism, well, what can Xue Yang say? He's a material boy, living in a material world...
Plus, he has that near perfect view of Song Lan and his stall, selling some sort of pancake-like wrap today for which Xue Yang has no name (he blames his shoddy upbringing) and he refuses to check the signs. He can, however, see just how much business Song Lan has - a never-ending queue of people that he and a-Qing are barely fending off.
He's wearing black today, too, a t-shirt instead of a tank top, but it's weirdly sheer against the light. Slutty. He almost looks cool with his bucket hat and towers over all his customers, so they don't even obscure him to Xue Yang's gaze. It's a total disgrace.
Anyway, he can't let him win, and so he throws himself into selling as much as possible. Thankfully, Xuanyu is on the same page. They have more or less the same stock as yesterday, mostly for financial reasons, but it actually pays off, with some people buying the exact same things as yesterday.
That's one reason why Xue Yang almost forgets his little deal with Xingchen. The other reason is that Xingchen turns up late - either he overslept, since he looks rather windswept when he does arrive, or he's aiming for a different customer base.
He looks almost stylish in a white t-shirt, wide blue jeans and a cardigan in deep forest green, but he's a little too skinny to pull off the cut of his pants and the cardigan is fraying around the seams. He still looks good, though.
The third reason is that Xue Yang, much as he wants to chat to Xingchen, is dreading it a little bit. Not only does he have that weird, bittersweet feeling around him, but he's never been good at feigning enthusiasm, which he's going to have to do, choosing from his art. Otherwise Xingchen will be even sadder than he was yesterday. Xue Yang should really pay for it, too. The guy isn't selling anything, how can he give away stuff just for some food?
As it turns out, Xingchen is not sad at all when Xue Yang finally manages to walk over to his stall.
"A-Yang! I just made a sale", he exclaims cheerfully as soon as he sees him. Xue Yang wonders whether it's his first today, his wares never seem to deplete that much.
"That's great, gege", he says, though, and means it - he's definitely pleased for him. He also just uses any excuse to call him gege, to be honest.
Xingchen is clearly an actual empath, because he seems to read Xue Yang's thoughts. "I know, I know, I'm not selling much in comparison to you guys." He sighs.
"Well, food is easier", Xue Yang offers after a pause. That's true, right? People have to eat... Arts and crafts... Well, that's optional, right? "Besides, you've only just started selling, haven't you? It's bound to take time."
The thing is, he's not really sure he should encourage Xingchen, since it's clearly not working - he's been doing this longer than Xuanyu and Xue Yang. On the other hand, they have Meng Yao's backing, which helps.
Besides, Xue Yang suddenly realizes with awful clarity, he'd rather suck off Jin Guangshan than crush Xingchen's dreams.
Xingchen seems to believe him, anyway, because he smiles, so brightly it disperses Xue Yang's doubts. He even feels better about picking something from his wares. How hard can it be?
He stares at the unsettling porch rocks, the unidentifiable pottery, the even more unsettling wood art. How much time does Xingchen have to make these, anyway? And then there's a fourth section, that's even more eclectic, strange sculpture-like items made out of a variety of random - some rather unpleasant - materials...
"Junk art, to value and recycle items we discard", Xingchen says proudly.
Xue Yang barely hears him, though. "Uh. Is that... a tampon?"
There's only about five of them, actually somewhat hidden at the back. The tampons are hung by their strings, frayed open at the bottom so they're shaped like little ornamental ghosts, complete with googly eyes stuck to them. They're actually... kind of cute?
Xingchen blushes a bit, but his voice is firm.
"Well, they're a bit random, but I made them for international women's day. I thought it was funny. They could work for Halloween, too. And I know sanitary products should be donated, but these were expired..." He trails off, blushing more. Cute.
He's such a strange goody two-shoes, though, normally Xue Yang would have no choice but to bully him some more, in person this time. For some reason he can't do it, though. It's not just because Xingchen is hot; it's really most confusing.
Luckily, Xingchen rouses Xue Yang out of his reverie just then. "How's it going with Sweet / Vicious, anyway? You seem to be doing well these days. I'll try spread the word about your stall, too. Oh! Song Lan-gege loved the cupcake, by the way."
Yeah, right, sure he did. But see what Xue Yang means? Xingchen's just a nice guy.
"I'm glad. And yeah, we're doing okay", Xue Yang says lamely, weirdly tongue-tied around him. To make matters worse, he finds his own face grow hot under Xingchen's open gaze.
"Anyway, if the offer still stands, I'll take one of these." He points at the tampon ghosts again. They're cheap, so it won't be a big sales loss for Xingchen, not that Xue Yang has any reason to care about that.
"Really? I'm glad you found something so quickly. I realize my art is not for everyone."
Xue Yang should just nod and smile and take his damned ghost, but he's overcome by morbid curiosity. "What do you mean?"
Xingchen shrugs while gently wrapping the little ghost in some tissue paper. "Well, art is always subjective, of course, but apart from some people I know... Well, let's just say I've also had some rather frank reviews online. It's a shame, because I've not had many reviews at all and I really can't think of who may have been that unhappy with their purchase, but it's a free world, right? They have a right to make their displeasure known."
People he knows? Who'd be so shitty to say it to his face?
As to the rest... There's no guarantee he's talking about the Jiangzai review, Xue Yang tells himself. He can't remember how many other reviews there were, but surely he wasn't the only one thinking this way about Bright Art's pieces. Even if, as Xingchen said, leaving a bad review is no crime.
He takes the little parcel Xingchen holds out to him, resolved to think no further about all of this, when he accidentally catches a glimpse of Xingchen's cash box (he has no card reader). It's basically empty. The guy must have another job or is rich and just wastes his time here, he decides.
"Thanks", he says, already turning away.
Except... would a rich person come on a cargo bike in fraying clothes?
Xue Yang turns back. Before he can stop and think, he picks up a random piece of wood "art", based on nothing but the price tag. It has very strange vibes. As far as he can see, it's the most expensive item on the table.
"Actually, I'll also buy this. I need a present for, uh, Xuanyu's dad."
He doesn't know what the hell he's doing or why. He doesn't usually buy presents for daddy Jin, but this might come in handy if he ever needs one. He figures the thing's energy could at least contain the elder Jin's bad vibe, sort of like a reverse gargoyle.
Xingchen pauses. When he looks up at Xue Yang from his seat, his eyes are a bit wary.
"Really? I mean, I know it's quite a bit of money for something that isn't exactly practical. I know you guys only started your business..."
Why is he arguing? Gosh, not only is his art weird, he's worse at this than Wen Ning.
Xue Yang shrugs, feeling himself get irritated. He says breezily: "As you've said, our business is doing well. I think it would make a great paperweight for daddy Jin's office."
When Xingchen looks startled at that he adds: "He's also my boss's boss, so you know... He's worth it." This part is true, at least, though probably not how Xingchen thinks.
Xingchen's smile is back. "Okay, then. Thank you for your business. Shall I gift-wrap it?"
Xue Yang finds himself returning his smile, in spite of himself. "Sure, why not."
He then watches for five minutes while Xingchen's beautiful hands struggle with more tissue paper, recycled wrapping paper, tape, ribbon. Weird, he's sure he's seen him wrap stuff nicely before. At least once.
He ignores Xuanyu, who waves frantically from their stall as a queue is forming. His plan to outdo Song Lan clearly won't come to fruition today. He doesn't mind as much as he thought, though, because from this angle, Xue Yang can see that Xingchen has a smattering of light freckles on his perfect cheekbones. His pretty lips are pursed as he's concentrating. Adorable.
"So, what made you start this stall, then?"
The silence was getting kind of awkward, but Xue Yang didn't mean to randomly blurt it out. Still, it's an innocent enough question. It's actually weird it hasn't come up yet.
Xingchen bites his pink lips and says nothing for a long moment. He's stopped wrapping, too - the ribbon is still partially undone.
Xue Yang glances over to Sweet / Vicious. Xuanyu has given up trying to get his attention and is now serving customers so fast he almost looks like an octopus, arms everywhere.
"Ah, sorry if the question was forward. I think I've got to go back, but catch you later? Thanks for the ghost."
Xue Yang holds up the little package he's already received and reaches for the clumsily wrapped one. Xingchen hands it over without pointing out that the ribbon is still untied. Instead, that other smile is back, the slightly sad one.
"It's a perfectly fine question, it's just a long and boring story. Short answer, I lost my job and suddenly had a lot of time on my hands." He shrugs. "Anyway, you really should get back, sorry I didn't notice how long I took!"
"No worries." Xue Yang means it. He he has more questions for Xingchen, but he is out of time. He waves his good byes and finally rejoins Xuanyu. Who glowers at him, clearly pissed off.
"What the hell, Yangyang. You leave me alone when it's this busy, just so you can get some dick?" He hisses.
"Shhh, there's customers", Xue Yang retaliates (it's true, too). "Anyway, it's not like that." Apart from everything else, he doesn't think Xingchen is at all interested in him.
Xuanyu only raises his eyebrows at him, unimpressed. He's talking out of the corner of his mouth while he keeps arranging a mix of roses and androsace for a woman. "You're in no position to say anything about our customers, if you can't even show up. Besides, it's different. Your voice carries."
He turns away to smile at the customer lady, sweet perfect future son-in-law that he is, in spite of his whole vampire get-up thing. When she leaves, he turns back and studies Xue Yang, who knows he doesn't have a poker face, but still.
"Yikes", Xuanyu comments wryly. "You didn't even pull. No more sneaking off during work time to talk to crafts guy, if you can't even show anything for your troubles."
"First off, he's called Xingchen, not crafts guy", Xue Yang says pointedly. "Secondly, I wasn't even trying to pull, but who says I haven't got anything to show for it? He gave me a gift."
He doesn't want to make fun of Xingchen's wares or anything, but he can't let Xuanyu claim he's got no game. He unwraps the tampon ghost. It looks at them both with big, googly eyes.
Xuanyu blinks. "Is that a..." He starts, then trails off. He takes the little ghost from Xue Yang and spins it gently from its string. "You know what? I've no idea how somebody would get this idea, but it's actually kind of cute. You could hang it from one of the kitchen lamps. Actually, maybe the bathroom-"
"Forget it!" Xue Yang interrupts him quickly, snatching it back. "It'll obviously go in my room. It was a gift for me."
Xuanyu's smile is way too dangerous for some skinny kid that Xue Yang knows for a fact would never stand a chance against him in a fight (even if he's not that much bigger himself). "Oh, sure you weren't trying to pull-"
"How are things going with you and Huaisang, anyway?"
Xuanyu scoffs. "That's all you got? Great, actually. I mean, fine. Nothing's happened. Yet. At least I got his number!"
And if that wasn't enough to wipe the smile from Xue Yang's face (he's happy for Xuanyu, really), Song Lan chooses this exact moment to come over, in itself a rare occurrence. Xue Yang forgot about their one-sided competition, but can't help but notice now that Song Lan won, anyway. He's completely sold out and a-Qing is packing up.
Xue Yang also forgot how tall Song Lan is; this close up he has to crane his head, like he's talking to a damn giraffe.
Song Lan examines the wrapping paper from Xingchen's stall, apparently recognizing it. "I hope you're not making fun of Xingchen's stuff. He's new to all of this, give him a break."
Xue Yang wonders if Song Lan knows something he doesn't. Xingchen probably talks to him, his Song Lan-gege... Then again, he calls him a-Yang, so who knows. Anyway, not that Xue Yang disagrees with the general sentiment, now that he knows Xingchen, but who does Song Lan think he is? Xingchen's knight in shining armor?
"Why would I be making fun of him? Are you implying he's not a good craftsperson? Anyway, what's it to you?"
"I'm not implying anything, I merely know from bitter experience that you are not above underhanded methods."
Oh, Song Lan can be a catty bitch when he wants to be. However, a bigger person - somebody like Xiao Xingchen, probably, to pick a person at complete random - would accept that Song Lan has a point and use this opportunity to apologize.
Unfortunately, Xue Yang is not a bigger person. He gives Song Lan a bright grin that shows maybe a few too many teeth. "Youthful indiscretion. Now, if you'll excuse me, we're busy."
"No, not anymore", Xuanyu, the traitor, mutters way too loudly.
Xue Yang scowls and the ghost of a smile passes across Song Lan's face.
"Fine, I'll go. Wouldn't want to be accused of business sabotage." Song Lan's already turning around, when he speaks again over his shoulder.
"Just wanted to say, thanks for the cupcake. I don't like cake, but a-Qing ate it and said it wasn't half bad. Which is high praise, coming from her. And it was nice that you offered it to Xingchen. So, thanks, I guess."
"What's it to you?" Xue Yang says for a second time. And not half bad, that little shit a-Qing has a nerve...
But Song Lan's already walked away anyway, leaving Xue Yang standing behind his stall feeling both foolish and angry.
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Time by passes by quickly.
The weather turns and Xue Yang learns that the whole market stall business is a lot less fun with rain drumming on their awning and dripping into every little gap while entire rivulets are flowing down the front of it, splashing their necks whenever they lean too far forward. Song Lan, who's been doing this for years, is turning up in a food truck instead, so he and a-Qing stay nice and dry. Typical.
Xingchen, perhaps wisely, hardly comes at all for a while. One of the times he does come, his wares covered only by an extra large umbrella while he wears a duckling yellow raincoat, he ends up looking like a wet, bedraggled cat. His business seems to be even slower. All in all, he looks so pitiful, Xue Yang can't even be mad that Song Lan keeps bringing him food. Even though Xingchen turns down his own cupcake offer, again.
That's the last time Xue Yang sees him for a while.
"Do you think he got sick?" He asks Xuanyu as they set up on a gray, but at least dry holiday in late May.
Xuanyu doesn't ask who. Instead he briefly pauses his fight with the awning and shrugs. "Maybe. But maybe he's just taking a break, doing other work."
That would actually make sense. Xue Yang sighs. Apparently, he looks so forlorn at that, Xuanyu doesn't even tease him. (He's not even upset, at all. He's just had a dry spell - how ironic in this weather - so he's bored). He's not sure why he's that worried about Xingchen, either. Not only is there nothing going on between them, Xingchen isn't hardly even a friend.
Wei Ying, he of the hot vegetables, calls Xue Yang's efforts to find out where Xingchen is "slightly yandere", in spite of Xue Yang assurances that he's got no personal interest.
Weird, when Song Lan keeps bringing Xingchen food or Wei Ying's po-faced lawyer boyfriend follows his every move, that's fine, but Xue Yang's a stalker for asking some innocuous questions.
All Xue Yang did was offer Xingchen some cupcakes, buy expensive merchandise he didn't need, try to look him up online a few times (not much luck, other than Bright Moon he only found him on some website about community and volunteering work) and ask anyone he could think of if they'd heard from him. And he supposes he does like looking at and talking to him, but not in a creepy way. Those are hardly crimes. So sue him.
He looks at today's cupcake offering somewhat sadly. For the holiday, he'd made dark chocolate cupcakes with peanut butter frosting and vanilla and gold ones that are kind of decadent, but for some reason he thought Xingchen would have liked them. Vanilla seems like a good match, no sexual puns intended whatsoever.
Xue Yang wouldn't dare guess at his sexual preferences, although he thinks he now knows that Xingchen is gay. With an unfortunate crush on Song Lan. Life is truly unfair. Song Lan's sex life surely needs no boost.
Anyway, the cupcakes are his master piece, bright and sparkling among the dark brown and honey tones of the other cupcakes and the black and deep reds and violets of Xuanyu's flowers today. He could have given one to Xingchen and been finally free of his debt, since his past efforts seemed insufficient.
Xuanyu studies him. "Did you make those cupcakes for him?"
And that's the downside of working with old friends. They think they can read you.
"No, of course not", Xue Yang says, but because Xuanyu is an old friend, whom he actually trusts, he can't help but add: "Why would I? I owe him nothing and he's clearly into Song Lan."
Xuanyu purses his lips. "Or they're just friends and he likes Song Lan's food? Maybe he just doesn't have a sweet tooth. Not everyone's like you, you know."
"Who doesn't like cupcakes?" Xue Yang protests. "Xingchen's no sociopath."
In spite of his unsettling art, he's sure of it.
"It's just a thought." Xuanyu shrugs and puts on gloves to arrange thorny roses into bouquets. He refuses to remove the thorns, which Xue Yang respects, though they've had a couple of complaints. One customer even showed them the blood stains they'd left on a cloth napkin as a result of arranging the roses. Kinky.
Anyway, Xue Yang ponders the thought - and watches Song Lan, in Xingchen's absence - but obviously he can't work out Xingchen's reasoning for refusing his cupcakes by thinking on it. Song Lan's also a poor substitute, for all his good looks and sexy ways of serving food. The guy's just got an irritating aura or whatever.
The day doesn't get any better. When they're packing up, Huaisang suddenly appears, playfully slapping Xuanyu's ass. Xuanyu grins and giggles. Then he turns to Xue Yang.
"Hey, um, I'm going to bail. You're alright getting back on your own, right? Can you unload the leftover flowers for me? Make sure they have enough water. Thanks a million, Yangyang!"
And then there's basically just a plume of dust, cartoon-style, and Xue Yang is alone (there is no dust, but it feels like it). Song Lan chooses this moment to walk past with a bag of rubbish. He smirks at what is definitely a stupid expression on Xue Yang's face.
"Got dumped?"
"You wish", Xue Yang mutters. He speaks quietly, though, and either Song Lan doesn't hear him or doesn't care.
Song Lan has already passed him (Xue Yang is once again staring at that toned back, the muscles somehow visible even through the black turtleneck he's wearing today), when he surprises himself by speaking again.
"Uh, Song Lan... Do you know where Xingchen is?"
He half-expects to be ignored again, but Song Lan turns back around. "No idea. I take it you've not heard from him either, then?"
Does Song Lan think Xue Yang has Xingchen's number or something? He's curious, but if he asks more, he'll either really come across as a stalker or, best case scenario, as a gossipy auntie.
So Xue Yang clams up. "Obviously not. Well, I guess it doesn't matter."
Song Lan snorts, Xue Yang can't fathom why. "I guess it doesn't." Then he walks off.
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Another week passes. Business is going well, but Xue Yang's personal life is so-so at best. The thing is, he maybe doesn't have too many friends, other than Xuanyu and Meng Yao. The latter is terminally busy and the former is having a steamy, passionate affair with Huaisang, something Xue Yang wishes he didn't know.
He had to buy fucking ear plugs just so he doesn't have to hear the sounds anymore.
Wei Ying, who's become a friend of sorts, too, visits their place and somehow wanders into Xue Yang's room ("Sorry, I thought the bathroom was this way". Yeah right. Nosy, much?). Still, the guy is as cool as Xue Yang's suspected from the beginning - he and his boyfriend bought a farm outside the city (hence the vegetables) and are trying to turn it into some sort of anarchist commune.
They chat for a while, when Wei Ying spots the ghost.
Now, Xue Yang has had a reality check in regards to Xingchen over the past few days. He's not at all yandere, but the thing is, he might have gotten just a little obsessed, for no reason whatsoever. Xue Yang has plenty of offers on the apps, thank you very much, and while he could do with another friend, that's hardly such a pressing matter. Someone nice and sweet like Xingchen is probably not right, anyway.
Xue Yang did mean to get rid of the ghost, but reconsidered. The little guy is an innocent bystander in all of this.
"Xue Yang, are you listening? I asked, is that a tampon?"
Xue Yang scowls. "So what if it's a tampon? Real men aren't afraid of periods, you know."
Wei Ying bursts out laughing. "Yeah, I know that. Is it from an ex? I thought you were gay, too? Well, it could still be from your ex..."
Again, nosy, but Xue Yang shrugs. "I don't like labels, but I guess I'm bi or pan or whatever, who cares."
Not Wei Ying, since he's only got eyes for his Lan Zhan-gege.
Anyway, Xue Yang isn't embarrassed about having a tampon ghost in his room, but he doesn't really like to talk about relationships, romance, that sort of thing. Xue Yang hooks up, that's it.
Nor does he want to talk about Xingchen, in spite of his curiosity. He doesn't need to hear that he's yandere again. Maybe it is getting weird. He clearly needs to get out and get laid. Then he'll forget all about pretty, sweet, strangely sad Xingchen.
And about Song Lan.
Wait. He's not even thinking about Song Lan. They've hooked up already, after all.
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He might not be thinking about Song Lan sexually or romantically, but he does think about him as a competitor (doesn't matter that he sells something completely different). The highlight of the next week comes when Sweet / Vicious sells out all their stock before Song Lan's stall.
Xue Yang's self-control has been fraying these days (he still hasn't gotten laid, since he keeps having to go to bed at by 9pm). So he ends up walking to Song Lan's stall to gloat.
"So, just wanted to say that we're leaving, since we sold all of our stock."
"Bye then", Song Lan says dryly, while Xue Yang can hear a-Qing mutter "Good riddance to bad rubbish", loud and clear.
"If I had a minor working illegally for me, I'd make sure she at least behaves", Xue Yang hisses, before smirking in Song Lan's face. "Anyway, you've got to admit, we won this time."
"I'm 21, you asshole", a-Qing snaps, while Xuanyu, the coward, calls from behind: "Hey, leave me out of this!"
Song Lan only shakes his head.
"What? Just take the L and move on." It started off as a little joke, but now Xue Yang is getting a bit irritated. Trust Song Lan to think he's somehow better than him, even when the facts say otherwise.
"Take the L? What does that even mean?"
Gosh, it's like talking to an old man.
Song Lan continues: "Anyway, you seem to think we're rivals or something. Hate to break it to you, but we're not."
"Yeah, we're not even selling the same thing. Relax, Yangyang." Xuanyu's actually left the stall and appeared by Xue Yang's side, apparently sensing trouble.
"A-Qing, can you serve that customer, please? I'll be back in a moment." Then Song Lan faces Xue Yang properly, and... Oh. He'd forgotten about that. Incensed Song Lan is hot.
Song Lan's voice is controlled, but Xue Yang can hear he's pissed off. "Right. For one, we're not even selling the same thing. But two, we're not rivals, because we're not in the same league. Don't believe me? Want to see my tax returns?"
Wow, so much for Song Lan being more mature or whatever.
"Love it when you sweet talk me, gege," Xue Yang sneers. "Anyway, we've only just started out. You can never admit I'm good at anything-"
Song Lan interrupts him: "When did I ever say you're bad at anything? Don't take your self-esteem issues out on me. And you know why things used to not work out for you in the past?"
"I'm sure you're about to tell me, and guess what, I don't care what you think!" Xue Yang should walk away at this point, but he's rooted to the spot. He thinks there's people looking now, too.
Song Lan steps closer. This close, Xue Yang can smell him. He smells nice, of savory food, slightly sweaty, but also earthy and woodsy. His stance is mildly threatening, though and Xue Yang can feel himself tense. The only reason why he's not reacted yet is because he knows Song Lan. The guy is many things, but not violent.
For a moment, they just stare into each other's eyes. When Song Lan speaks, his voice is low.
"Things don't work out for you, because you're like this. You can never just take a good thing and be happy with it. A-Qing is right, you're kind of an asshole. I don't know why Xingchen gives you the time of day, he's too nice for his own good..."
Ouch. That's below the belt. At least that strange spell is broken.
"Well, fuck you, too," Xue Yang says very eloquently and walks off, head full of fantasies of smashing cupcakes into Song Lan's stupid, handsome face.
He turns around again when he reaches Sweet / Vicious. "And I still won! You just can't admit it!"
He's still fuming hours later, when he's laying in bed at 8:45 pm like some granddad. Wondering about Song Lan's weird jibe about Xingchen. What was that about? He's not even seen the guy in weeks.
If he eventually soothes himself by leaving another scathing review (Song Lan's not got much of an online presence, but he just posts it to the general market website), nobody needs to know.
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By the time it's mid-June, Xue Yang has pretty much given up on ever seeing Xingchen again. Which, he suspects, wouldn't matter much to him at all, except that his sex life is still non-existent.
If he'd tried to track him down online even more fervently, it was due to nothing but sheer boredom. He didn't find much, anyway, except, from Facebook of all places. Not only is Xingchen friends with Wei Ying (who never breathed a word, et tu, Brute, etc), it revealed the Chinese characters for Xingchen's name.
Well, if anyone should be named after dawn and stardust, it's Xingchen. He's got a beautiful soul or whatever.
Not that this information is much use to Xue Yang as he and Xuanyu set up their stall at some sort of summer festival in an area unfamiliar to both of them.
Sweet / Vicious has their usual dark fare - a deep black-purple iris flower and "Black Star" calla lily as well as dark chocolate espresso and dark chocolate buttercream cupcakes. But, since it's Pride Month, Xue Yang obviously also has the same cupcakes with rainbow frosting (he's been feeling too drained to make three different types all together), while Xuanyu has rainbow bouquets. Though he, too, has been moaning about having to procure a completely new range of flowers for those. Xue Yang only hopes their sales with justify the added expense.
At least, there's no trace of Song Lan and a-Qing. Ever since their strange confrontation recently, things have been rather tense, though they'd mostly gone back to just ignoring each other. Anyway, Xue Yang hardly sees anyone they know here. While it's to be expected that they can't always share events with the same people, it's weirdly disconcerting. Not even Huaisang is here.
"He's helping his brother out in their actual store", Xuanyu tells him after selling a small mix of the striking black flowers to a woman with stunning tattoos and bleached hair. "He did say he's not keen on this area, though."
Xue Yang looks around. He's sees quite a few families, but they're usually good for the cupcake part of the business in particular. If anything, it's not really busy enough. Also, the stalls are somewhat haphazardly strewn around, which is probably another reason they don't recognize anyone. It means that they're mixed in with activity booths and seating areas. Near them, there's a group of young men drinking heavily already. It's barely past midday.
"It is a bit of a weird crowd", Xue Yang concedes. "I guess if we don't sell anything, we can always leave early."
Xuanyu nods. He's unusually quiet today, but just then a family of five gathers around the cupcake display, so Xue Yang can't investigate it further. They're good customers, too, buying three of each kind, including the rainbow ones. Business slowly picks up after that, but it doesn't last. A mere half-hour later there's another lull.
The sun's high in a slightly hazy blue sky. It would be pleasant, if it wasn't too hot and boring. Xue Yang sells one more measly espresso cupcake, before he finally realizes just how uncomfortable Xuanyu is.
A middle-aged couple buys some iris without comment, but the woman stares a little too long at Xuanyu's mid-length, checker-patterned skirt and the stockings showing over his boots. The man makes a disgusted face when he clocks his make up, which is understated, but a little more feminine today.
Xue Yang looks at them in warning and the woman backs away quickly enough, but the man frowns at him, clearly considering whether he'd like to show him his place (or whatever he thinks that should be). He's probably racist, too. Joke's on him, because Xue Yang - feeling tense, too, and always protective of Xuanyu - is actually spoiling for a fight.
The man doesn't deliver, stomping away and muttering something that could either be "kids today" or "there's kids here". Xue Yang doesn't give a flying fuck either way. Xuanyu is looking a bit shaken up, though.
"Let's just stop, business sucks, anyway", Xue Yang says and Xuanyu doesn't argue. Once they've loaded their stuff into their van, though, Xue Yang makes a snap decision.
"You go. I'll have a look around."
"You sure?" Xuanyu sounds surprised and he's right. Xue Yang should go back. He could maybe take a nap, since he never sleeps enough. Plus, work hasn't stopped for today. When he's back, he has to unload and re-load the dishwasher, clean the kitchen, prepare what he can for tomorrow, do inventory and maybe place an order...
And yet. It's a warm day and he's at a festival. While it's a bit crap, at least the location is nice. In spite of the bad encounter, he has a desire to be among people, not working away on his own.
"Yeah. I'll just check out the competition, maybe get some food. I'll take an uber back."
"Don't start any fights with Song Lan, if you meet him."
"No promises."
Well, at least Xuanyu is back to normal. Then he's gone. It's only when the car's left that Xue Yang notices a bunch of iris that got left behind. He should just throw them away, but they are too pretty. Maybe he can give them to somebody who might like them.
Anyway, Xue Yang feels fancy-free and footloose, even if he has to carry the flowers. He starts off by buying a massive coffee, then aimlessly wanders around. There's an actual fun fair part a bit further out in a field, which he hadn't noticed earlier. There's even one of those swing rides that go up high into the air.
But first, there's another cluster of stalls that he's got to check out. No Song Lan, as far as the eye can see, which is... Definitely good, Xue Yang decides. He only hates how it makes him think that Song Lan knew something they didn't.
Before he can contemplate this further, though, he spots a familiar sight. After not having seen them for a while, the scary wood art and porch rocks are strangely pleasing to the eye. Even more pleasing to the eye, though, is the person behind the stall.
Xingchen isn't wearing his glasses today, he's cut his hair, and for a guy who's almost as tall as Song Lan, he looks tiny.
Xue Yang hesitates. There's absolutely no question that he's going to talk to him, he realizes, but just now there's a little gaggle of people around the stall. Normally, Xue Yang would welcome this opportunity to level out the playing field, but somehow, he doesn't want to spoil it for Xingchen.
Except it becomes quickly clear that the people - a bunch of teenagers on closer inspection - have no intention of buying anything. Instead, they're pointing and giggling at various things. Before Xue Yang can decide whether to intervene and how, one of the group, a girl, catches sight of Xingchen's face.
Xingchen's not saying anything, but he is pouting, Xue Yang realizes and it's just too adorable. The girl, minor or not, seems to think the same thing. She abruptly stops giggling, blushes, then orders her friends away in a manner eerily reminiscent of a-Qing.
People are shallow, but at least Xingchen's general cuteness is an asset.
However, Xue Yang does become aware then that he is behaving ever so slightly yandere by lurking. He still doesn't move, though, because now a couple of men around their age approaches the stall. From the way in which Xingchen's eyes widen, Xue Yang can see that he knows them. One of them, at least.
Deciding that his skulking is getting really weird regardless, Xue Yang edges closer to hear one of the guys say: "Wow, I was wondering what you were doing now, but trying to actually sell your crap wasn't on my bingo card."
"Please leave, if you're not going to buy anything." Xingchen's voice is calm and unwavering, but his expression is... Not exactly frosty, but certainly tense.
The guy's not budging. "Well, my boyfriend and I are just browsing. You've never met Sam, have you? My bad, of course not."
Xue Yang is sensing something here, but he can't quite put his finger on it.
To Sam's credit, he seems uncomfortable, too, stiffly waving at Xingchen, who still pouts and barely nods. The guy who's spoken - admittedly tall and handsome, a little like Song Lan, if Song Lan was white and mean(er than he is) - picks up one of the porch rocks, turning it over in his hand.
"What's this even supposed to be? Art is kinda useless, anyway, but this isn't even art. Well, it's your business, but I clearly won't take you back and support you again when you can't pay your bills."
Oh. That guy must be Xingchen's ex.
"I wouldn't come back to you if I was starving and you were the last person on earth."
Xue Yang can't help it, he laughs. Who'd have thought sweet, mild-mannered Xingchen could be so savage?
The ex replies: "You'll get off your high horse quickly enough when you fall on your ass, which is inevitable with this business venture of yours. Please, Xing, at least retrain or something. You're too naive to function, you'll never survive running a business."
A large part of Xue Yang wants to deck him for that. He doesn't care if the guy is bigger than him, either, he fights dirty. But he's not sure Xingchen would want that. Although, whatever they once were to each other, he clearly hates that guy's guts now. He must do, right?
Xingchen's face is uncharacteristically unfriendly, but not exactly angry. He seems almost absent, even as he replies: "What I do or don't do now is none of your business anymore. Please just go away."
Still so polite. Too polite. Perhaps Xue Yang shouldn't start a fight, but he can't watch this anymore. Then he gets a sudden flash of inspiration.
He pushes past the two guys none too gently, as though he's only just arrived, the bunch of elegant iris held aloft in his right hand, which has the added advantage that he can't use it to attack the guy.
In fact, he totally ignores him, smiling brightly at Xingchen instead.
"Sorry, I took so long, babe. I saw these flowers and thought of you, but there was a queue... Oh, am I interrupting something?" Xue Yang has a feeling that his little charade fools exactly no one, but it doesn't matter. He could be Xingchen's boyfriend, even if he isn't, so this should work.
As long as Xingchen plays along, that is. As it turns out, he seems mostly surprised.
He mouths "babe", before saying "A-Yang", eyes wide, which is a good start, even if it's not the most effusive greeting. Xingchen also takes the proffered flowers, though he seems unsure as to what to do with them.
It doesn't matter, because the ex has shifted his focus to Xue Yang, looking at him like he's something particularly nasty stuck to the soles of his shoe. That's not something that bothers Xue Yang, though. At least it doesn't deter him. He lightly shifts his stance, just in case, and gives the guy his most shark-like grin. It's gratifying when he takes a step back in response, even with his height advantage.
"Actually, you're not interrupting anything. We were finished." Xingchen has apparently regained his senses, because he sounds calm and cool now. Xue Yang is a little impressed.
The ex looks back and forth between them one more time, then sneers. "Of course you had somebody lined up, so much for that whole innocent act and getting pissed at me for not being a monk. You're right. We're done here."
He drags the other guy away without another word.
If Xue Yang was a nicer person, he'd hope that the new boyfriend bails quickly. In reality, he can't really think about anything but Xingchen, whose face is calm, but whose hands are shaking now, dark iris petals are fluttering into all directions. Xingchen notices and gently places them down, wringing his hands instead.
"Sorry", he says, not looking at Xue Yang, who's kind of at a loss now. Hadn't that gone well? Had he been overstepping? Why is Xingchen apologizing?
"For what?" And why does Xue Yang always sound so stupid around Xingchen?
"That you had to see that. I also ruined your flowers." Xingchen tries to hand them back.
"Why are you apologizing for your asshole ex? Keep the flowers, if you want. I gave them to you."
Xingchen looks at them again. Xue Yang can't read his expression, but when he speaks next, Xingchen's voice almost sounds awed. "Really? They're pretty."
He lifts them up, apparently to smell them, but ends up hiding his face in them. "Nobody's ever given me flowers before."
How is that even possible? Well, Xue Yang supposes it's not really a thing for guys in their 20s, but Xingchen is 28 or 29, plus he's beautiful, likable and he's dated. Even Xue Yang, who grew up in foster care and doesn't date, has gotten flowers... Yeah, okay, his one little foray into dating was with a future florist. Still.
Xingchen seems a bit embarrassed now and the silence is stretching on too long.
Xue Yang, who hates awkward silences, clears his throat. "This type of iris is called "After the Storm". Kind of fitting, don't you think?" Good thing he listens to Xuanyu.
Xingchen smiles the tiniest smile and nods. He's standing very stiffly, though, clearly still discomfited. Xue Yang looks at the stall full of various arts and craft projects. There's not been another customer in a good twenty minutes.
Xue Yang sees an opportunity to finally settle his debt (and yes, fine, he'll admit it - relieve his slight guilt).
"We stopped selling early because there wasn't enough business. If you're done soon, too, do you want to get that drink with me? My treat."
Xingchen hesitates, a slight frown on his face. He contemplates the flowers again.
Perhaps Xue Yang should take a hint and bail? Because he's starting to think that this must be what's going on here. Xingchen, who regards everyone as a friend, just doesn't like him, specifically. He can't say it doesn't hurt. Then again, it might be deserved, given his behavior, although he didn't think Xingchen knew about any of it. Unbidden, Song Lan's words play in Xue Yang's mind.
Then Xingchen nods. "That sounds fun. Give me fifteen minutes to pack up?"
It's more like half an hour, by the time he's carefully stowed away all of his things. Then another ten of Xingchen fretting about whether his stock will be safe. Xue Yang has to bite his tongue from pointing out that no one is going to steal those things. He supposes he might be wrong anyway. People steal garden gnomes and shit, right?
So he stops being judgmental and instead finds Xingchen a railing, hidden by some bushes, to lock his cargo bike to.
When they finally sit at a little table in the shade, Xue Yang thinks it's been worth the wait. It's really nice. He'd fully expected Xingchen to order herbal tea (not that there would be anything wrong with that), but they're both drinking Margaritas.
They're still not talking much though, just inconsequential chit-chat about their fellow acquaintances. At least Xingchen's questions about the markets he missed opens room for Xue Yang to ask some questions, too.
"How come we've not seen you for a while?"
So far, Xue Yang realizes, Xingchen has been kind of cagey whenever he asked questions. Not this time. He looks at Xue Yang, perplexed. "I was working, of course." He smiles a bit wryly. "I'm not exactly making a ton of money, selling my pieces."
Huh. So he does know that and has a day job?
"That's good to hear, I remember you said you'd lost your job."
Xingchen sighs. "I did. I'm only temping occasionally, covering for somebody. I'm still kind of broke to be honest."
"I know what that's like. That sucks." Xue Yang says it without thinking, but it's true. Until fairly recently, he was moving from one badly paid job to the next.
Xingchen smiles at him, a genuine, warm smile. "But you and Xuanyu are doing pretty well now. Good on you."
Xue Yang's not really good with this whole sincere, open your heart thing. "You'll get there too."
He's not sure if he believes it, but he finds he wants it to be true.
Xingchen's smile fades a bit. "You don't have to say it. Anyway, I'll find another job eventually, but meanwhile, I have to do this. By myself."
There's a stubborn set to his jaw that Xue Yang hasn't seen before. He doesn't really understand what Xingchen is saying. It does make him uncomfortably aware though that he isn't really succeeding by himself. Not like Song Lan did, for example.
Then again, isn't it naive anyway? No one succeeds on their own in this world. When did he start to care, anyway? About Xingchen or about such things?
To gloss over his discomfort, Xue Yang raises his glass. "Let's drink to future success."
Xingchen's smile returns as they clink glasses.
"You've got to hold eye contact!" Xue Yang says hurriedly, and Xingchen complies.
Xue Yang almost regrets it though, when they drink while gazing at each other. Xingchen's eyes are as lovely as the rest of him. It makes him feel things, belying what he's told himself and anyone who'd listen - that he's not at all interested in Xingchen.
Then Xingchen blinks and sighs again. "I never thanked you for earlier. That was a nice thing you did."
Xue Yang can feel his cheeks heat up; probably because of the alcohol. It's a hot day and he's out of practice, he shouldn't drink too much.
He gives Xingchen a bright smile back. "Anytime, gege."
Now it's Xingchen's turn to blush and isn't that a sight for sore eyes. Unfortunately, Xingchen's thoughts still seem to be with the asshole ex. "You're too kind", he mumbles (not something Xue Yang hears too often), then: "I should stand up for myself, I know, it's just... hard."
Xue Yang has been intrigued by Xingchen and wants to know more, although he'd be hard-pressed to say why. Hooking up might be easier without too much baggage.
He asks anyway: "I'm guessing the break up was recent? Did you guys live together?"
"Yes to both." Xingchen takes a rather large gulp of his drink. "And we worked together, which is why I'm now nearing thirty, single, unemployed and sleeping on a friend's couch."
"At least you still have friends", Xue Yang quips reflexively. Gosh, he sucks at this.
Xingchen pouts and drains his margarita. Xue Yang can't help but laugh, he's just precious. "Do you want me to get you some water?"
"Thank you, but I'm perfectly capable of getting my own water." Xingchen is carefully over-enunciating in the way of people who are slightly tipsy (it was his second Margarita, to be fair).
He's also pouting even more, which, while cute, is cluing Xue Yang up on the fact that he's not happy. Also, he's obviously able to get his own water...
Xue Yang might be slow to follow and confused as to what his own endgame is, but he knows one thing: he doesn't want Xingchen to have a bad time. They should also stop drinking for a bit. Probably. He's not used to being the sensible one.
He gets up and goes - literally - out on a limb: he reaches out his hand. "Come on."
Xingchen looks at his hand like he'd looked at the flowers earlier, perplexed. Xue Yang briefly wonders if he's misreading the signs, but he's not that slow. Anyway, what's the big risk here? They're definitely still young and free and it's a beautiful day.
When Xingchen finally does take Xue Yang's hand - only for the moment it takes Xue Yang to pull him up - it's cool and slender, his skin soft (like he moisturizes and doesn't continuously have to wash either his hands or dishes) and his grip surprisingly strong.
Xue Yang instantly misses it when he lets go, which is stupid.
"Where are we going?" Xingchen asks. He sounds curious rather than wary, though.
Xue Yang smirks. "No more sad talking. Let's have some fun."
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"Oh! I want to do that!"
Xingchen grips Xue Yang's arm in his excitement. Xue Yang follows his gaze to the swing ride. It has just started, the carousel part spinning slowly as it rises on the pole, higher and higher into the still blue sky. It stops, high up in the air, before spinning faster.
"Really?" This doesn't seem like something Xingchen would like, but then again, he's surprised Xue Yang a few times this afternoon. He has to admit, he just didn't know him very well so far. Not that he's complaining about this adventurous and lively side of him.
"Yes! Come on!" And Xingchen's dragging a laughing Xue Yang along like a large, over-excited puppy.
"With all our stuff?"
Xingchen's still carrying the iris, their stems wrapped in a wet tissue. Though they've lost quite a few petals by now, he's refusing to throw them away. Xue Yang, on the other hand, is carrying a mid-sized sheep plushie he's won at a throwing booth.
Xingchen waves him off. "It'll be fine."
It's only early evening and still fairly warm, but Xue Yang notices that huge clouds have started to pile up in a no longer perfectly blue sky. Well, they should be fine for a while.
They've sobered up quite a bit, too, having eaten, but Xingchen still seems relaxed, more open. Rather than the mild-mannered, slightly naive and cloistered do-gooder that Xue Yang thought he'd gotten to know, Xingchen is gentle, but curious, smart, easy to laugh with a sassy side.
He still knows little about the guy, though, other than his run of bad luck and some likes and dislikes. Xue Yang normally isn't that curious, rarely cares enough about another person. Everything in regards to Xingchen feels unusual and new.
Xue Yang's not one to miss an opportunity, though. He's learned from bitter experience that they're far and few between as it is.
"What's your job, by the way? My boss - Xuanyu's older brother - he knows lots of people, maybe he could ask around..." This is true, although, since Xue Yang vaguely knows from his internet sleuthing that Xingchen's work has to do with social services, that's probably not Meng Yao's wheelhouse anymore.
"Thank you." Huh, Xingchen's immediately stiff and formal again. "But don't worry." He pauses, then adds quickly: "I was - am - a social worker, but I'm not sure I can work as one again, at least not here. Jonathan - my ex - sort of trash-talked me quite badly to some important people, made me sound... incompetent. Anyway, let's not talk about me. I've been meaning to ask you, actually..."
Xue Yang perks up at that, although Xingchen's cryptic hints haven't really cleared anything up.
"The name of your stall, Sweet / Vicious... I don't suppose it's from that good but obscure MTV show from like nine years ago that about three people watched?"
"It is!" Xue Yang is genuinely excited. "I take it you're one of those three people then? Well, the other two would be me and my boss, then. Coinkidink."
Xingchen giggles.
The full story is this: Xue Yang was still in school and Meng Yao was in college when they'd watched the show. The story of SA victims turned vigilantes struck a chord with both of them, though Meng Yao especially. It had been his favorite show until The Glory came out earlier this year and he thought the name would be fitting for their business with an edge. Those aren't things that Xingchen needs to know just yet, though. Or ever. Why is Xue Yang planning for an imaginary future with him?
Luckily, the ride stops just then, the people leaving their seats with obvious jelly legs.
Even more luckily, the seats are always in twos, ideal date night set up. Not that this is a date, but still - if Xingchen is scared, Xue Yang can hold his hand. The ride starts moving almost as soon as they've closed the safety bars, spinning slowly and gently at first.
Then it starts to go up. And up and up.
Xue Yang never thought he was afraid of heights. He is reassessing that now. The ground is so far below and his legs are dangling over the abyss. The ride stops spinning for a moment, leaving them suspended in the air. Up here, there's a stiff breeze.
Xue Yang looks over to Xingchen who smiles widely at him before looking around, seemingly completely fearless. Huh.
"This is fun!" Xingchen calls over the music that has started playing - some bubblegum pop Xue Yang faintly recognizes.
Then the ride starts spinning again, here, high above the ground. It accelerates, the sky and the darkening clouds flying past.
Xingchen's laughter soars over the music. Xue Yang's hands grip the bars so hard his knuckles are white, but his stomach is full of butterflies.
He can feel Xingchen's body heat as he leans in. "You okay? Scared of heights?"
"No", Xue Yang yells back, but Xingchen takes his hand, anyway.
"It feels like flying! You just gotta let go!"
This is the kind of hippie dippie shit Xue Yang expected from Xingchen after their first encounters, but he tries, focusing on the breeze, the feeling of lightness, the sunny tune.
The warm, firm grip of Xingchen's hand.
Just for a moment, he's totally weightless, unburdened by worldly demands. Free.
The ride is over all too quickly. When they're back on the ground, wobbly like newborn foals for a few steps, they're high on adrenaline. Xingchen is even more carefree than before. He's also touchy, but Xue Yang can't work out whether he's flirting or just being friendly and relaxed.
They quickly come back down to earth, anyway, when the first drops start falling while they're still out in the open field.
"Quickly!" This time it's Xue Yang who pulls Xingchen and they're running towards the booth and stalls with parasols and tents. Lightning flashes, answered by distant thunder, as the rain starts falling more heavily.
They're soaked and breathless by the time they reach not the stalls, but a large tree that offers shelter.
"Wait." Xingchen pants. "Should we be under a tree during a thunder storm?"
"I'm sure it'll be fine." As a city boy, Xue Yang has no real idea, but his t-shirt is sticking to him, cold and wet, and the pleasant breeze is suddenly an unpleasantly cold wind. He can see his nipples.
He can see Xingchen's nipples. Xingchen's light-weight, cream-colored slacks are also soaked, showing a clear outline of his dick. Xue Yang can feel his blood start to travel down so fast he gets dizzy.
He just hopes Xingchen won't notice he's getting a semi. It's really been too long.
When he forces his eyes up again, though, Xingchen is looking straight into his. He licks his lips, perhaps they're just dry, but perhaps not in this weather, and then they're suddenly touching, Xue Yang's not sure who made the first move.
He leans in for a kiss, tentative at first, then deepening it. Xingchen's mouth is hot like today's sunshine, sharp like the tequila in their Margaritas. He moves closer, still breathing a bit fast. Moaning into Xue Yang's mouth when Xue Yang palms him through his slacks.
He pulls back slightly so he can see Xingchen's face as he starts to open his fly. His cheeks are flushed, his eyes wide, lips parted, looking like he came straight out of one of Xue Yang's wet dreams. Not that he had (m)any of him. Honestly.
When Xue Yang still hesitates, Xingchen takes his dick it himself. It's as pretty as the rest of him, Xue Yang thinks.
He says it out loud, his brain clearly having gone off-line, making Xingchen giggle and moan in the same breath. He locks eyes with him as he spits into his own hand, before he starts to jerk Xingchen off.
They kiss, Xingchen rutting against his hand. When he cums he pulls back, maybe to breathe, throwing his head back, his skin slick with rain, his face so beautiful.
"Want to suck you off," Xingchen says then and starts to sink down immediately, as if they weren't in some field. His sight causes hot arousal to pool in Xue Yang's groin.
But his spider senses are tingling again. Xue Yang looks around, somewhat belatedly. The tree is sheltering them well enough and there's not many people around anymore, but just then, a whole group is moving towards them.
Xue Yang remembers the incident with Xuanyu earlier. He's not normally afraid, loves to have an excuse to have a go at a bigot. The thought of somebody attacking Xingchen is sickening, though. He has no idea what Xingchen would be like in a fight, he just assumes he's a pacifist, but either way, he doesn't want to risk it. So, he's got to put a stop to this, for now. The universe truly does hate him.
He quickly pulls Xingchen up. "Hold that thought, babe."
Xingchen looks at him for a second, his eyes still dazed and starry, then comprehension dawns on his face as he looks around. He disentangles himself abruptly from where he'd still been touching Xue Yang, taking a few steps back. Xue Yang can feel his wet clothes again, sticking cold and unpleasant to his body. At least he's growing soft again rapidly.
Xingchen smiles ruefully. "Oops, I tend to not really think about that... Good thing you noticed." Then he giggles. "Babe?"
Xue Yang laughs as well. "Where you really going to blow me in the mud wearing white trousers?"
"Why not? Clothes can be washed. Or did you think I was some virgin?"
Xingchen's tone is still light, but there's a weird edge to his words.
Xue Yang's brain is still not working. "Of course not, I guess your ex just made it sound as if you weren't adventurous..." He catches himself, too late. "Sorry, forget I said that, why would I care what your ex says..."
Now that they've broken apart, the clouds are parting, too, the evening light a soft, reddish glow. Xingchen's face has darkened, though.
"If you're talking about the monk comment, what he meant was me objecting to him sleeping with everyone in the vicinity without even telling me. I wasn't even against an open relationship, you know? I just wanted him to tell me before. Besides, I guess it was only open for him."
Xingchen takes a breath, while Xue Yang bites his lip, dimly aware he should apologize. Then again, didn't he just do that? It was a stupid thing to say, he knows, but this is precisely why he doesn't date. Too complicated. Anyway, he knew that ex is an asshole.
When the silence stretches on too long, he eventually says: "What a dick move."
Xingchen nods, seeming a little mollified. Too easily, really, Xue Yang thinks, but he's glad all the same.
They've picked up their things and started moving again, Xue Yang is not sure where to. Xingchen looks at him. "Speaking of, it's probably best we paused there."
Xue Yang gives him a confused look. "Speaking of what?"
Xingchen looks away. "I should have asked earlier, but... What about Song Lan?"
What about him, Xue Yang wants to ask, but he's so confused and kind of irritated that Xingchen mentions him now of all times. "Not here, is he?" He says.
There is a pause. Xue Yang is still not getting it. Then Xingchen scoffs. "That's your response? You can't be serious."
Then he gives Xue Yang a look and turns away, walking across the muddy field. The iris he must have dropped while they were kissing are lying on the ground, their delicate flowers crushed. Xue Yang knows that they must've gotten their wires crossed somehow, but he can't help but think he's been right all along. Xingchen likes Song Lan.
Fine. They're probably much better suited for each other, but what is he messing around with Xue Yang for, then? The thing is though... It's not fine. It hurts. Which means that Xue Yang... really does like Xingchen.
He's too angry right now to make sense of it. "I don't have to ask his permission! Do you think we're dating or something?" He calls after Xingchen, who stops dead in his tracks.
Luckily, no one pays them any mind. Xue Yang has embarrassed himself enough in public lately.
Xingchen does turn back after a second. "Aren't you? You keep staring at each other, like..." He seems to grow uncertain, suddenly looking almost guilty. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have assumed anything..."
He's walked back up to Xue Yang, looking lovely and worried, Xue Yang isn't exactly even angry at him, he just suddenly feels weird. This wasn't supposed to be anything but a little bit of fun and now he's drowning in confusing feelings.
He forces himself to wave Xingchen off. "Well, you probably picked up on the fact that Song Lan and I hooked up years ago, but now we hate each other."
Xingchen seems startled at the last bit. "Hate?"
Xue Yang shrugs. "Yeah, hate, like you hate your ex."
"I don't hate him."
See? He's just too sweet for Xue Yang. It's not like Xue Yang wants to be nice and help bring him closer to Song Lan or anything. But still. Best to just nip this in the bud.
"Listen, I should go. I still have work. Do you want to share an uber?"
Xingchen seems even more startled at that. Then, for just a split moment, he looks hurt, before seemingly pulling himself together. When he speaks again, his voice is still warm, though. "Thank you, but I can't. I've got to get my bike."
Oh, yeah.
"A-Yang... Maybe we can talk more at some point? I feel we're leaving things a bit..." Xingchen trails off again, shrugging helplessly.
Why does it hurt now when Xingchen says his name? Why can't he just take the peace offering? What is going on with Xue Yang, anyway? It's like he's a teenager again.
Xue Yang doesn't date and he doesn't do complicated feelings. Time to bail.
"Yeah, sure. I'll see you at the market, if you're back soon, we can talk then. Get home safely," Xue Yang does add, then he turns and walks away.
He realizes he's still carrying the stupid plushie that he's won. It's wet and ugly now, no longer fluffy. He'd wanted to give it to Xingchen, but he never got round to it. Out of nowhere, Xue Yang feels like crying.
Xue Yang takes a breath, not giving in to these absurd feelings. Nothing happened. He hadn't particularly wanted for anything to happen, other than sex, maybe. Whatever. He'll just never think of Xingchen outside of work again.
So, like the responsible adult and small business co-owner that he is, he takes a deep breath, fishes out his phone and calls an uber.
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Back home, he intends to free himself from any (totally imaginary) obligation towards Xingchen by deleting his review (yeah, he should have done it sooner, but better late than never). With a gnawing sense of guilt, he vaguely notices that it's had gotten some engagement since he posted it - comments, likes, whatever. He locks his social media (at least the once that could be connected to it), and that's that.
For no reason whatsoever, Song Lan's voice rings in his head: "You're kind of an asshole."
He's one to talk. Besides, what did Xue Yang even do to Xingchen? Leaving one bad review is hardly a sin nor will it be the reason for his lack of income.
It might, however, be a sign to take a break from of all of that.
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Xue Yang has a few self-care days (mostly he's baking and trying out new recipes), goes for an after-work drink with Meng Yao and even gets on the apps. Everyone looks weirdly unattractive to him, so he closes them pretty fast, throws his phone on his bed for good measure. He'll try some other time. When the appealing people are back.
Instead, he revives his languishing membership and goes to the gym.
He is actually serious about Sweet / Vicious, though, and so he can't let whatever (didn't) happen(ed) get in the way of it. It's going to suck seeing Xingchen and Song Lan together, even if he's not interested in either of them, just because he's a sore loser (he knows it's only a matter of time, they're really made for each other, actually), but he'll just have to man up and deal.
So soon, he finds himself back at the usual big weekend market in the nice part of town, unloading his wares alongside Xuanyu.
The chocolate cosmos and Stardust andrace are back, the last of the kind, as well as the baccara roses, but Xuanyu has added some deep crimson snapdragons called "Black Prince", his personal favorite. Xue Yang has to agree they're cool, if only because snapdragon is already a fantastic name for a plant. They also go well with Xue Yang's trusted black forest cupcakes and his latest creation: liquorice black velvet cupcakes.
Song Lan's stall is of course opposite to them again and Xingchen, too, is there, at his usual spot somewhat to their left, but still well visible, unfortunately.
Or fortunately, because what ever happened or didn't happen between them, Xingchen is still pretty. He's even still polite, waving at them, though he looks weirdly unhappy.
"Is Xingchen alright?" Xuanyu asks. He turns to look questioningly at Xue Yang, who doesn't react quick enough. "What happened with you two?"
Oops. Xue Yang never told Xuanyu. Now's not the right time, though.
"Nothing", Xue Yang mutters therefore, which is actually true. Xuanyu looks doubtful, but Xue Yang is saved by a customer already heading towards them.
All in all, it turns into a successful day, or at least a profitable one. It's a bit frustrating to now being ignored by both Song Lan and Xingchen, but Xue Yang can still surreptitiously look at both of them, at least, when works gets too slow or boring.
Plus, there's other people to talk to - some of their customers are actually cool people Xue Yang happily makes small-talk with and then of course there are their other friends.
Though Wei Ying's hunky partner is inexplicable hanging around his stall all day (doesn't he have a life?) and Huaisang and Xuanyu are still in the disgusting honeymoon stage of their apparently serious relationship. Mianmian's husband and kid show up, too. Finally, when a-Qing's boyfriend, Zizhen (why does Xue Yang even know his name?) comes to pick her up, Xue Yang has to turn away in frustration.
Why is everyone pairing up like they're going on the arc, or whatever it's called, anyway? People in relationships are truly sickening.
Luckily, he's mostly too busy to really care. When the market day draws to its close, Xue Yang realizes something mildly strange, though: Xingchen isn't talking to Song Lan much and vice versa.
They are looking at each other, occasionally, and Song Lan brought over some lunch and Xingchen smiled at him, though also less brightly than usual. Maybe he feels weird about what happened with Xue Yang? Seems strange, though. Clearly, he and Song Lan aren't together yet and it was just a kiss and hand job. Xue Yang and Xingchen were probably still a little drunk, so it doesn't even count.
What's even weirder, a couple of times, when Xue Yang's looking at either of them, they're looking at him, but he can't read either of them. It's truly confusing.
Because thinking about it gives Xue Yang a headache (this sort of thing is precisely why he avoids relationships), he instead focuses on something else, which just happens to be Xingchen's merchandise.
He realizes then that Xingchen just looks glum in general.
Judging from his display, he made at most two sales today. At least he got free lunch. Xue Yang would love to give him one of his cupcakes, too, but apart from everything else, he thinks Xuanyu might actually have been right about Xingchen not liking sweet things. He did, however, like the flowers. There's one of the chocolate cosmos and stardust androsace bouquets left.
Stardust. Perfect. Part of Xue Yang knows it's a bad idea. They're not even interested in each other and while Xue Yang is a bit of a masochist, he likes a different kind of pain. Xingchen is clearly sad, though, and it's tugging on Xue Yang's heretofore non-existent heartstrings. Maybe Xue Yang still feels mildly guilty about his past conduct.
Why is Song Lan not getting the message and cheering his future LOML up, anyway? Looking over, his stall is still really busy and a-Qing left, so that explains that.
"What are you doing? These last till tomorrow", Xuanyu hisses as Xue Yang grabs some flowers. He ignores him. He can take the money out of Xue Yang's part of their profits.
Xingchen is packing up again; it's surprising he even stayed so long, given everything.
He tenses a bit at Xue Yang's approach, which sucks. Xue Yang waves the flowers as a peace offering, making Xingchen smile at least a bit.
"Don't worry, I'm not here to talk about last time", he says as soon as he is close enough to not have to shout. "Or at all, you probably want to leave..."
At the same time, Xingchen says: "I'm sorry, I think I overreacted because of Johnny..."
The nickname rubs Xue Yang the wrong way, but obviously he has no right to say anything about that. That much he knows. Anyway, he thought they had an unspoken agreement to let bygones be bygones.
"It's fine! Don't worry," he says again. "Nothing happened."
Xingchen frowns slightly at that so Xue Yang quickly waves the flowers in his face again. "It's just..."
It's just, somebody ought to give you flowers because you're worth it? Sounds creepy. You looked super sad, probably because you're passion business is failing, so here's a consolation price? Uh...
"...we couldn't sell these and they may not last. I can give them to somebody else, but you liked the iris, so..."
Xingchen looks at the flowers and apparently catches the scent of the cosmos, his nose moves like a rabbit's. Cute. "They smell like chocolate." He sounds surprised.
Xue Yang has to laugh, in spite of the awkwardness. "That's their thing. And the other ones are called stardust, so..." He starts, then trails off. Crap. He can't reveal that he knows how Xingchen's name is written without really seeming like a stalker.
To distract them both, he continues: "Don't pass them on to Song Lan, he's allergic to flowers. But anyway, don't worry, I'm not expecting anything." Then, to clear up any confusion: "This isn't weird, by the way! Xuanyu gives his friends flowers all the time."
Xingchen looks bemused. Then - finally - he smiles that sweet smile again. "Thanks, a-Yang. I'll keep them It's very kind of you."
He stows the flowers away very carefully, then gets on his bike and waves good bye, but not before throwing another glance towards Song Lan's stall.
Annoyed, Xue Yang stomps back to Xuanyu, who definitely overheard him.
He looks at him, half-amused and half-exasperated. "Did you remember to say "no homo", too?"
He thinks he's so funny.
Xue Yang has no time for him, anyway. Song Lan's finally finished - and looking directly at him. With a frown. When Xue Yang meets his gaze full on, though, he turns away.
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It should be impossible, but things carry on like that for a while.
Xingchen and Xue Yang talk sometimes and Song Lan and Xue Yang, too, albeit less often. Still, Xue Yang is trying to be civil, nice even, though it's wasted on Song Lan especially. The big guy just looks suspicious, but acts normal, otherwise. At least it confirms to Xue Yang that their little argument recently hadn't even been that big of a deal.
Xue Yang's not even sure why he reacted like he did back then; not like no one has ever called him an asshole before. Though it's a bit rich, coming from Song Lan-gege.
Song Lan and Xingchen talk, too. If anything else is going on between them, Xue Yang is none the wiser. He doesn't at all understand what the hold up is. Maybe Xingchen's break-up is still a bit raw? It's none of his business, anyway. Still, Xue Yang would fuck the first person he meets in his place, to make up for the bad karma. (Yeah, he needs to get laid).
Karma. Xingchen is starting to rub off on him, even when they only occasionally hang out.
Another thing that stays the same is that Song Lan's business is successful, Xue Yang (and Xuanyu) are doing pretty well most of the time, while Xingchen...
That's yet another thing that's strange. Xingchen told Xue Yang he was doing temp work, but now he's practically at every market and fair again. When is he making money? Maybe he's freelancing somehow? He looks more and more dejected, though, too.
On top of that, Xue Yang notices he hardly has new stock, not that he needs it. Clearly, he's not making things anymore, though. And while before he at least chatted to some customers and occasionally seemed to have charmed someone into buying something, his confidence seems as frayed as his clothes.
Now, Xue Yang knows it's not his place to do anything about it, even if there was anything he could do. It's just - he doesn't want to watch this any more and no one else is doing anything, either. Especially not Song Lan, other than the lunch thing. So obviously, Xue Yang decides to hold him responsible.
Song Lan tenses up when Xue Yang accosts him in his food truck before the market one Sunday. Like Xingchen did, when he brought him the flowers. Gosh, is he that scary?
"You startled me", Song Lan says with a frown. "You shouldn't sneak up on a person holding a knife. Why are you here, anyway?"
Xue Yang snorts. "It's nice to see you, too."
Song Lan continues using said knife to chop vegetables like the professional he is. Xue Yang hates to admit it, but it's rather sexy.
"Xue Yang, don't take this the wrong way, but I'm kind of busy. So what do you want?"
Xue Yang came armed with a plan, but explaining it is another matter all together.
Song Lan sighs. "If this is about the ...incident, I'm sorry I called you an asshole, okay? And the other stuff. You can be a bit intense, but I shouldn't have said it like that."
Wow. Of all the things Xue Yang thought were going to happen if he entered the lion's den (Song Lan's food truck, in this case), this was not it.
"Uh. Thanks", he stutters, blindsided. Do people even say thanks when somebody apologizes to them? Then he shocks himself by saying: "I'm sorry, too."
Even more shockingly, he means it. He's going soft, just when it's most important in his career to be hard-nosed. Anyway, he's not even sure what he is apologizing for - how he acted last time? Culinary school? He decides to cover up his confusion by just spelling out his mission.
"But that's not why I'm here. What are you going to do about Xingchen?"
Song Lan puts the knife down. It's very quiet without the sound of the cutting.
"What?"
Xue Yang has never been able to read Song Lan very well, although they've known each other for almost a decade. Even if they did lose touch for a while. Anyway, he's still sure that Song Lan isn't feigning his confusing. For a smart person, he's really dense.
"Well, you like him and he likes you", he eventually says by way of explanation.
Rather than that clearing it up, Song Lan looks even more perplexed.
"What?" There's a pause. "You think he likes me?" As if his words are catching up to him, Song Lan blinks and shakes his head, like a wet dog would do.
"Even if, what's it to you?"
Xue Yang isn't a fan of having his own words thrown back at him and is also losing patience with Song Lan's stupidity. He's not going to help him hook up with Xingchen, if that's what he's hoping for. He's a big boy, he can accomplish that on his own.
"Surely you've seen how much Xingchen is struggling? Somebody needs to help him and obviously that someone is you."
The confusion on Song Lan's face is clearing alarmingly fast. While Xue Yang didn't like it when Song Lan was acting dense, it turns out he likes him even less when he gives him a knowing look. What does he know? It can't be good.
"If you are so invested in Xingchen's business, perhaps you should be the one to help him."
Xue Yang can tell Song Lan is trying to tell him something with the weird inflections, but the communication part of his brain has kind of reached capacity for the moment. The tiny space they're in is steamy and Song Lan is wearing a vest top and standing too close...
Song Lan groans and wipes sweat from his brows with his muscular upper arm, his latex gloved hands staying clean for the cutting. It does absolutely nothing to help Xue Yang focus.
"Look, I really don't have time for this. Have I noticed that Xingchen's not selling a lot of things? Yes. And I know he's between jobs. But Xue Yang..."
Xue Yang is looking at him in confusion as Song Lan, contrary to his earlier words, sits down on the one chair. He looks tired, too, he suddenly notices. Well, makes sense, the guy works 24/7.
"What?" He says eventually, when Song Lan doesn't continue.
Song Lan seems to search for the right words. Then he says: "I actually think it's nice that you care that much about Xingchen. But he's an adult."
"I know he's an adult. This isn't a school bake sale, I don't think they let kids have stalls here. Though I suppose a-Qing..."
"Don't you think that joke has run its course?" Song Lan asks dryly.
"Fine", Xue Yang admits grudgingly. "I'm just saying, I know he's an adult. So what?"
"So, we shouldn't just meddle in his life. He's clearly a smart, capable dude, who just hasn't found his niche yet, so he's trying out some new stuff. That's really admirable, actually."
Song Lan clearly means it, especially the last part. So why isn't he asking him out then?
Xue Yang finds he doesn't want to know. Instead he says "I know it's admirable", somewhat defensively. Song Lan is clearly insinuating that he doesn't take Xingchen seriously, which is not true. He takes him very seriously, which is why he's doing this.
"Isn't it just a waste of his time and resources?"
Song Lan gives him a disbelieving look. "That's not your decision. And I still fail to see what any of this has got to do with me. I wish Xingchen well, but I'm not his-"
He cuts off when Xue Yang scoffs.
He can't allow himself to consider Song Lan's words or he may come to the conclusion that the man has a point. Instead, he changes tack.
"But he always looks so sad when he doesn't sell anything. Look, I'm not saying we'll do anything extreme, but maybe we can advertise for him or something. Encourage friends to buy from him."
For once, Song Lan doesn't argue. He looks astonished. Xue Yang seizes this chance.
"Don't you see his sad face every day? Have you no heart?"
Song Lan gives him another disbelieving look. Maybe Xue Yang is laying it on a bit thick.
"Where was all that empathy when we are culinary school, huh?"
Xue Yang can feel himself pout. He knows this is the time to properly apologize, but... "You said you'd call me and you never did!"
Song Lan stares at him, but to his credit, he doesn't ask what Xue Yang is talking about.
After a longish pause, he clears his throat.
"I didn't think you cared. Everyone knew about your commitment issues."
Then he looks at his watch. "Damn, Xue Yang, I'm way behind schedule now. I'll think about the Xingchen thing, okay? You, out, now."
"I'll hold you to your word! This time I know where to find you!" Xue Yang says, but he lets Song Lan push him bodily out of the truck (which is somehow very sexy, by the way).
"You knew where to find me the last time, too, and you never did. Not even to apologize", Song Lan says. Then he closes the truck's door in Xue Yang's face.
He didn't sound angry, though. And he'll think on it. Xue Yang considers this a success.
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He half-expects Song Lan to let him down again, anyway. Perhaps he would have, too, but then, two weeks or so later - they're well into July now and it's hot as balls - something happens.
At first, it's only that Xue Yang and Xingchen talk more again. About random things - books and anime, Xingchen's work, which he actually liked (he's a social worker working in youth outreach, but not like the ones from Xue Yang's past), how he'd like to open an animal shelter, what he does for hobbies other than art and craft (yoga, reading, watching stuff, games... refreshingly normal for someone who looks like an otherworldly prince).
He seems happier again, too, and occasionally sells a piece. Financially, that can't do much, but perhaps it boosts his confidence. In any case, Xue Yang starts to think that maybe Song Lan was right - that he was fine and they'd just be meddling.
Other than that, nothing happens. If Xingchen was ever interested in Xue Yang as more than a friend, he doesn't show it and Xue Yang feels he's had enough emotions lately to last into his 30s. Maybe they'll hook up eventually, he'll scratch that itch, but for now, whatever this is... is surprisingly nice?
Xue Yang doesn't even ask questions when Xingchen doesn't come again one week. The guy's entitled to a day off, after all. It's certainly none of Xue Yang's business. Maybe he's doing the smart, realistic thing and is temping again.
Or, Xue Yang wonders on a Monday spent preparing at home... Maybe Xingchen has just finally given up on the whole market business. But then, he'd have at least said good bye, right?
The next Saturday, Xingchen is still not back in his usual spot. For some unknown reason, Song Lan has Xingchen's number ("I asked to exchange it, in case there's any market related stuff happening, like a normal person"). He grudgingly bows to peer (i.e. Xue Yang's) pressure, though, and sends Xingchen a message.
"I don't understand why I have to do it", he grumbles, but shortly after reports back. "He says he'll probably be back tomorrow."
Okay, maybe Xue Yang really needs a hobby or get laid. He's not sure what's going on, really. He's just been feeling unfulfilled lately in spite of all the business success.
It's that lunchtime lull for them, so Xue Yang sits down behind his stall and bites into one of his latest cupcakes, that got slightly too dented to sell. It's a tasty but unfortunately very bougie chocolate blackberry cupcake.
"Hate to be the bearer of bad news, but all cupcakes are kinda bougie, Yangyang", Xuanyu tells him. Xue Yang really needs to stop thinking out loud. "Will you tell me now what's going on with you and crafts guy... Xingchen?"
Xue Yang shrugs moodily and takes an extra large bite, so he doesn't have to reply.
"Speaking of Xingchen... aren't you guys following him on social media?" It's Huaisang, who rarely leaves his stall during market hours, but his massive beefcake of a brother is here today, too.
Actually, Xue Yang is following Bright Moon, but since that account is usually all about art and social justice, he rarely bothers to check in (not that Xue Yang is against it, per se, he's just not that passionate about it). He's also using one of his many aliases, he can't even remember which. In short, both he and Xuanyu shake their heads.
"Well, some photos of and rather unkind takes on his work have kind of gone viral, so he probably wants to lay low", Huaisang says darkly. "People on the internet suck. Well, people in general... I've got quite a big following and am trying to do damage control and I guess his venture isn't hugely commercial, but he really cares about his stuff, just cares in general, so I think it did hurt him, even if he tries to be cool about it..."
Xue Yang has dropped the rest of the cupcake. He has a queasy feeling in his stomach.
"How, though? I've never noticed anyone being mean to him here. There were some people being dicks at a summer festival, but those were just kids..." Then he remembers. "Also, actually, his ex, who seemed like an asshole."
He doesn't know if he's gossiping, but if anyone probably knows already, it's Huaisang.
"Oh, his ex sounds terrible. Not only did he cheat on him, he was really condescending by the sounds of it, always putting him down. I think that's why Xingchen is trying so hard to have a go at creating something..." Huasaing sighs. "Anyway, it could be the ex, could be some market-goer. They'd screen-shotted a pretty scathing review as well, but I suppose that doesn't mean anything. They didn't sound like a buyer. It was kind of funny, actually, but so mean..."
The queasy feeling in Xue Yang's stomach intensifies. Although, once again, he's surely not the only one who's had such thoughts of Xingchen's work. Even if it's grown on him.
"Can I see?" Xue Yang tries hard to keep his voice steady, but Huaisang gives him an odd look. He hands him his phone. Xue Yang can feel Xuanyu crowd in beside him as he is trying to to make sense of what he sees.
At first, he only sees Xingchen's profile - his Bright Moon account - and a post with a photo of his stall and a little description of what he does, how he enjoys trying out new things... Yeah, he sure does, Xue Yang thinks fondly, remembering their little almost date at the fun fair.
"Not that." Huaisang leans in, opens the other tab with what must be his own account (he does have an impressive amount of followers, Xue Yang notices).
He starts reading the replies to the post in question first. And...
...People are fucking nasty, especially the ones who do nothing with their lives except criticizing others from a safe distance. Xingchen, of all people, who's not harming anyone with what he does. Huaisang's phone starts shaking in his hands, he's so angry.
Then Xue Yang reads the actual post, and his stomach drops at the screenshot of his Jiangzai review, which is a big part of it. He hands the phone back as though it was hot.
Tries to tell himself it's no big deal. That he knew it was a shitty thing to do all along, so no need to get hysterical now. Anyway, he'd deleted that a while back. What asshole had taken and saved a screenshot? It must be the ex, Xue Yang decides...
"What the fuck", Xuanyu says, neatly summing it up.
"I know. They're trashing him in the quotes, too", Huaisang says, shaking his head.
Xue Yang can't listen anymore; perhaps he is somewhat responsible for this, so he needs to do something. He snatches Huaisang's phone back, even as the man himself yelps, and marches over to Song Lan, pushing past the queue.
"It's an emergency", he tells the first person in line.
"What are you doing?" Song Lan hisses.
Xue Yang thrust the phone at him. "It's about Xingchen!"
"A-Qing, I'm sorry, but could you take over?" Then Song Lan turns back to Xue Yang. "What now? Don't you think your strange new obsession is going a bit too far?"
Then he actually looks at the phone. Xue Yang made sure to open one of the first replies.
Song Lan takes the phone from him. As he scrolls, his face is turning very frosty indeed.
"I always knew people suck. Social media might be actual hell..."
A-Qing, done with the customers, comes to read over Song Lan's arm (she could never hope to read over his shoulder, child-sized - okay, petite - as she is). Even she looks utterly disgusted after reading.
"Poor Xingchen, he's so nice and just doing his thing." Then she looks at Xue Yang accusingly, for some reason. "So what are you going to do about it?"
Good question. "Well, I'm not sure. I guess the smart thing would be to try to control the narrative or start a counter-campaign..." Yeah, Xue Yang has been in too many meetings with Meng Yao. "I'm not really using social media personally, but Sweet / Vicious has an account..."
Xue Yang trails off. He knows that in spite of everything, he's not going to jeopardize his business venture by getting officially involved in some viral shitstorm. Even though none of this would have happened without your doing? A little voice - his conscience? - asks. Xue Yang ignores it.
What's done is done, he knows that well enough. No use crying of spilled milk and all that. He did the wrong thing, so maybe he can now do the right thing... What if Xue Yang uses his many accounts to harass the harassers? Could he maybe set up a bot to save time...
Song Lan eventually sighs. "I don't think there's much we can do. It's only social media. All these people are idiots and none of this is real. It sucks, but he'll get over it."
Xue Yang stares at him in disbelief. How can he be so cold? And "none of this is real"? Song Lan is truly a boomer at heart.
Song Lan sighs again. "I'm working, Xue Yang. And I know what you're thinking and I don't think Xingchen would appreciate you bullying people on the internet for him."
He might be a boomer at heart, but how does he know Xue Yang so well, even after everything?
Song Lan glances at the phone again, though, as he hands it back to Huaisang, who followed Xue Yang.
"I don't think there's any point in starting a big online campaign, it might do more harm than good. It'll blow over", Huaisang says, clearly having overheard them.
"Maybe we can do that other thing you said. You know, getting him some business. It couldn't hurt, I suppose," Song Lan says, though he still sounds reluctant.
Xue Yang can feel himself smile, widely and genuinely, at Song Lan of all people. He feels instantly lighter and more optimistic. "Let's do that."
First, he's going to bully some people on the internet for Xingchen, though. Including that guy Jonathan. How hard can it be to find him?
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"You want me to do what?" Meng Yao sounds tired and distracted, which unfortunately is his new default.
At least he looks better than ever, Xue Yang thinks. Money really gives you that glow, doesn't it?
"Well, ideally invest in a guy, but that might be premature."
At least that makes Meng Yao stop in his tracks. Literally; Xue Yang was getting tired following him around the nondescript, maze-like corridors of Jinlin Tai like a service dog.
At least it offered an opportunity to finally put that wood art into old man Jin's office. His secretary only looked mildly disturbed.
"I'm surprised you're even entertaining the possibility of me supporting any other venture than Sweet / Vicious. An artist, did you say? I'm not sure I've really reached the arts patron stage of my life yet."
Meng Yao starts walking again, giving some granddad executive a dimpled smile in passing that makes the grim-faced guy beam back. He's got powers Xue Yang has not, he has to admit.
"Well, could you just turn up at one of the markets and fairs and place a large order or something?"
Meng Yao stops again, so suddenly this time, Xue Yang actually bumps into him. He turns around to face him. Xue Yang's not getting a dimpled smile, instead Meng Yao narrows his eyes at him. "What's in it for you?"
"What? I'm selflessly helping another person."
"Xue Yang, we've known each other for long enough that you don't have to pretend. I know you're not a bad person, but you're not exactly known for your selflessness. Not blaming you, it's probably a survival thing."
Meng Yao says it like it's a matter of fact. The only reason Xue Yang doesn't explode is because it's him saying it.
"But if you want my help, you've got to give me the whole story."
"There is no story." Xue Yang grits out and Meng Yao turns on his heel.
So he caves and gives Meng Yao a quick run down of his brief history with Xingchen. Mere facts (sans the review). Nothing to see here.
When he's finished, Meng Yao is biting his lip, but the dimples are betraying him.
"What?" Xue Yang snaps. "Are you going to help me?"
"I'll help you. Under one condition. No, two, actually. Two - you show me some pictures of what I'm dealing with, if the art or craft is... that unusual. I don't like surprises, especially if they're coming from you."
Well, Meng Yao's lack of trust aside, that one is easy enough. Xue Yang has found some more pictures floating around on the internet. He shows him the one he deems best.
He really hopes he won't say anything nasty. Sure, he said some rather unkind things himself, but Xingchen's pieces have grown on Xue Yang. He won't hear a bad word now.
Meng Yao nods after a moment. "Fine. It's, uh not really my style or what I need, but these things are subjective. It's certainly... creative. Oh! I think Huan-ge has that on his porch. He said his former neighbor gave it to him. I always found it a bit disturbing, but he really likes it for some reason."
Xue Yang's head shot up at that. Meng Yao is pointing at one of the particularly unsettling porch rocks. "Really? You think Lan Huan's rock is one of his?"
Meng Yao snorts. "Must be. They're very... unique, don't you think?"
Yeah, that's probably the best description Xue Yang has heard so far. Then he remembers. "So what's the other condition?"
Meng Yao's smirk is borderline predatory, though he has the decency to lower his voice, given their in the public hallway of an office building, even if their are on the executive floor. "You've got to admit that you're in love with the guy."
Sometimes, Xue Yang really hates Meng Yao and his Machiavellian mind.
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Xue Yang does not know what to do with this new-found knowledge - and yeah, okay, he'd suspected it for a while himself. He's not that out of touch with his own emotions. Besides, what even is love, anyway? And what is he supposed to do about it now?
Luckily he has no time to think too much about it. He actually has to miss a few sales opportunities and let Xuanyu handle that side while doing some major shopping, cleaning, preparing and, finally, getting some sleep.
When Xingchen does turn up again at the market the next week, he shrugs it all off.
"It was really no big deal. People are entitled to their opinions and I never expected for everyone to like my stuff. That's not at all why I'm doing this. I welcome criticism."
He absentmindedly pets one of the porch rocks as though it was a small, furry animal.
"I just wish people would create more themselves, I guess, so they'd engage with it in a little more... of an open-minded and constructive fashion. Less focused on money, too."
"Well, we all need to make money," Xue Yang can't help but point out. "Are you an heir to a fortune or something?"
Xingchen smiles at him, but it looks tired. "If only. I'm still looking for another job."
He starts unboxing some weird metal-scraps sculpture that Xue Yang hasn't seen before. He's not sure if it's just because he likes Xingchen now, but it looks interesting.
In spite of his fierce words, though, he finds Xingchen looks so sad that Xue Yang could kick himself.
It might be part of the reason why he finds himself in a heated argument with Nie Mingjue later that day, who accused him of "littering", because Xue Yang threw a coffee cup next to the bin. As if it was his fault that the actual bin was already overflowing.
"So you find another bin or take the rubbish home. Do you do that with your stall's rubbish, too? Who the hell raised you?"
"Your mom." Xue Yang smirks and turns away after delivering that classic - vintage even - line.
He doesn't get far as a big hand actually grabs hold of his shirt, yanking him back around. Xue Yang finds himself face to face with an angry Nie Mingjue, who, this close up, is a veritable giant.
His face is beet red; he's going to give himself a heart attack at this rate.
Xue Yang's heart is beating too fast, too, and not in a good way, but on the other hand he finally has a way to channel all that pent up rage. He seizes it.
"Haven't you heard that the Atkins diet is bad for you? I know you're a butcher or whatever, but control yourself. Also, that reaction to such a silly joke? Mommy issues, much?"
"Stop talking about my mother, you feral little shit. And don't think I don't know who you are-"
Huh. Has Xue Yang ever done anything to Nie Mingjue that he doesn't remember? Unfortunately, it is a distinct possibility.
"You know who I am? I'm flattered. Unfortunately, I barely know who you are, though, so stop being such a tw-"
He doesn't get to finish the sentence, as two things happen very quickly. One, Nie Mingjue pulls back a fist as though he's actually going to punch Xue Yang, who isn't scared, but he is still held in place which makes defense difficult and Mingjue is big.
But before it can go anywhere, Song Lan is suddenly there, wedging himself bodily between them, his voice sensible and refreshingly cool, like water on a hot day.
"Calm down, da-ge. I'll talk to Xue Yang, he won't do it again..."
Xue Yang zones out, once again left to stare at Song Lan's back. He must be working out more, not only are the back muscles more defined, his upper arms aren't that much skinnier than Nie Mingjue's. When they first knew each other, Song Lan was much lankier.
Xue Yang knows he should be angry that Song Lan is talking about him as though he was a naughty kid, but instead he finds himself fantasizing about what sex with Song Lan would be like now. He could put those muscles to use.
"Are you okay?" Song Lan's voice breaks the spell. Nie Mingjue is gone and Xue Yang has probably blushed like some medieval maiden, but if Song Lan says anything, he'll just blame it on the heat.
"Why wouldn't I be?" He says, to take back control of the situation. "You didn't have to get involved."
"What did you think was going to happen? Mingjue is twice your size."
"Don't exaggerate. Besides, I do combat at the gym, same as you."
He has in fact seen Song Lan there at least once, though they mostly go at different times (and Song Lan probably much more often). It's true that Xue Yang would have been fine, though. He fights dirty, remember?
"Perhaps I should have let him punch you, anyway, given everything," Song Lan mutters darkly.
What the hell? That's the problem with him and Song Lan. The civility never lasts.
"Because I didn't thank you on my knees just now? Helping just so you can lord it over people is not helping." Xue Yang snarls.
"Not because of that," Song Lan snaps back. "Because of your childishness that gets people hurt. Jiangzai."
Xue Yang freezes. There is no way Song Lan can know that he is Jiangzai. How would he even get the idea?
He's definitely not thinking out loud this time, but Song Lan answers his question anyway.
"I went back to check. That screenshot in that nasty campaign against Xingchen reminded me of that random bad review I'd gotten. And when I looked at both together, there was just something about the voice that was familiar. Then I did some digging about Jiangzai and wherever they cropped up... Seemed to be places relevant to you."
Song Lan, internet sleuth. Who'd have thought it? Certainly not Xue Yang. It's typical, though. You can't even do some light anonymous internet bullying these days without being canceled...
"I have no idea what you're talking about."
"The review for my stall was on the day we had an argument, too. Coincidence? I think not."
"Do you put our encounters in your diary? You're so anal" Xue Yang is getting tired of this. He tries to walk away, but Song Lan won't stop talking.
"I don't give a shit what you say about me, although I thought you still owed me for the last time you fucked me over. But one bad review written by some immature guy won't ruin me. It won't ruin Xingchen, either, but it did really hurt him-"
Xue Yang whirls back around. "I didn't even know Xingchen when I wrote this! I didn't know it would hurt him like that! And I deleted it weeks ago. I was not the one who posted it to fucking Twitter of all places..."
His voice breaks and he cuts himself off before he starts crying in front of Song Lan or something. This is all so stupid, anyway, when did his life become a soap opera?
He knows he's blown his own cover now, but he even doesn't care. Better than that Song Lan thinks he did it deliberately, to hurt Xingchen.
Song Lan shakes his head. "You really are an immature asshole."
Xue Yang opens his mouth to argue back, then closes it. He hates that Song Lan has a point here. He also still thinks he might cry if he tries to speak and that won't do.
Song Lan sighs and wipes a large hand over his face. When he looks at Xue Yang again it's almost with pity. It makes Xue Yang's hackles rise again and dispels any potential tears, at least. Before he can attack back, though, Song Lan asks: "Is that why you're trying to help his business? You do actually have a conscience?"
He's answered his own question there, so Xue Yang looks away and shrugs. Then he finally has enough and just turns and walks away. He's just glad the bin is far away from prying eyes.
"You better make this right!" Song Lan calls after him, as though he's some old-timey father and Xingchen is his wronged daughter or something.
Xue Yang suddenly finds his voice again. He stops. "If you hate me so much, why didn't you just let the Nie beefcake beat me up? Why didn't you do the same as me and sabotage my business? Or get me banned from the market or something?"
Could he actually do that? Maybe, although it wouldn't be easy to prove that Xue Yang had written the reviews? The thought makes him feel nauseous. Will Xuanyu be able to do the business on his own? Meng Yao is an old friend, but blood is thicker than water, right? Well, maybe that doesn't apply to the Jin family, but still, he won't stand by Xue Yang... And what about Xingchen?
"I'm not going to report you. I won't tell Xingchen, either, although if I ever had such a lapse in self-control and did something like this, I think I'd want to come clean? Especially if what you say is true and you only wrote the bad review-"
"Why not?" Xue Yang interrupts him. He repeats: "If you hate me so much."
"I didn't let Mingjue lose control, because I'm not an asshole. Besides... I don't hate you. You make things so unnecessarily hard, but I like you. God only knows why at times like these, though. I've got to get back."
"Me, too." Xue Yang says, then clarifies quickly: "got to get back, I mean."
Song Lan snorts. "Don't worry, I was never under any illusion that you like me."
That's not true, Xue Yang realizes. He does like Song Lan.
As ever, he can't say it, though. Not in so many words.
"I guess I don't hate you", he mutters instead. And louder: "Thanks for just now. I'd have managed, but size-wise, you're better matched."
Song Lan gives him a half-smile that does weird things to Xue Yang's stomach. Maybe he's got IBS with all that weird nausea all the time lately.
To gloss over it, Xue Yang quickly quips: "Is that why a hot guy like you is still single? You were saving yourself for me?"
Song Lan barks out a surprised laugh. "Don't flatter yourself." He pauses. "Wait, so you still think I'm hot?"
Luckily, Xue Yang has already started walking and can pretend he hasn't heard him.
"All jokes aside though, you better make it right with Xingchen!"
The weird feeling in his gut intensifies in unpleasant ways. Xue Yang's definitely got IBS.
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Xue Yang has done what he can to drum up some business for Xingchen and hopefully Song Lan will have done a bit, too. Admittedly, there wasn't actually that much Xue Yang could do - Meng Yao was his trump card. Meng Yao even shared some of Xingchen's work online, giving it a positive spin.
Xue Yang had also spoken to all their friends at the market, trying to get the word out. Huaisang's friend Zonghui and his girlfriend had been game; the girlfriend, Xue Yang had been told, had bought not one but three items.
Indeed, when Xue Yang next speaks to Xingchen - for once taking a shared lunch break behind Xingchen's stall - he seems more optimistic. It helps a little with Xue Yang's lingering guilt.
For all his work, he hasn't yet come clean and is honestly not sure he should. What good would it do? Wouldn't it be worse for Xingchen?
"I mean, I doubt I can ever make a living out of this, but at last it's starting to cover the costs," Xingchen says happily just now. "Plus, it keeps me occupied while I figure out what to do with my life. I was just going to look for another social worker post, but maybe it's time for a change..."
Xingchen shrugs, then stretches like a cat. It exposes a little sliver of stomach and Xue Yang can't help himself, he says: "Biiig stretch."
Xingchen, taken by surprise, burst out laughing. He's so pretty like this. Then he grows serious again. "The viral thing was really disheartening, you know? As I said, people don't have to like what I do, at all, but they were so needlessly mean."
"You should have been mean right back", Xue Yang mutters. Xingchen shakes his head.
"No, waste of energy. Besides, what goes around, comes around."
Xingchen sighs, but it sounds more content than weary, and turns his face to the sun. Cat behavior, indeed.
Just then, a woman in her early thirties or so walks up, who Xue Yang vaguely recognizes as Wen Qing, Wen Ning's sister, whose also kind of friendly with Song Lan, probably because they've all been at that market for years.
Her eyes widen slightly as she takes in the merchandise, but she starts browsing and eventually chatting with Xingchen - who's at his most charming again - so Xue Yang leaves them. It's working, that's all that matters.
The one person that is obstinately unhelpful, however, is Wei Ying. Even though he's clearly quite good friends with Xingchen.
"Xingchen doesn't need our help, Xue Yang. More importantly, you can't be sure he wants it. If he did, don't you think he'd have simply asked for it?"
"No", Xue Yang shoots back. "Maybe he thought people would turn him down or see him as weak and incompetent."
Wei Ying gives him a strange look. "Right. So you admit that it's hard to know people's feelings."
"Obviously." Where is he going with this?
"You're so close and still not getting it." Wei Ying shakes his head in apparent exasperation. Rude. "You'll do what you want, anyway, but I'll have no part in this. Xuanyu is waving, by the way, you should head back."
"Fine." Xue Yang has already turned around, when Wei Ying speaks again.
"Has it ever occurred to you to just ask him out?"
Xue Yang pretends he hasn't heard him, but the words continue to echo in his head for the rest of the day and through most of the night.
Of course he's thought about it lately. But how can he, now?
And weirdly, Xingchen's words from that dreamy day at the summer festival echo in his head: And what about Song Lan?
Truthfully, he fully expected Song Lan and Xingchen to be a couple by now. Why would they care about a selfish asshole raised by wolves (and Meng Yao, too late) like him?
He's still not gotten laid. That'll cure him. Wearily, he opens up the app.
The little ghost that still hangs from his bedside lamp watches him with big, googly eyes.
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The small but steady influx of people to Xingchen's stall stops soon after and on an unbearably hot August day, Xue Yang starts to realize that he'd never considered that. Then again, it's the holidays, lots to people are bound to be away, and the change can easily be attributed to that. He'll just have to think of something, so it'll pick up again.
He doesn't know when his debt - of sorts - is going to be paid.
Song Lan isn't of much help, the guy is going to give himself burn out if he doesn't slow down. Xue Yang has hardly talked to him, since their heart to heart of sorts. Sometimes, he thinks he's just dreamed that entire encounter.
Plus, Xue Yang is bored, because Sweet / Vicious also has fewer customers. Xuanyu isn't here today, either, having to tend to his flowers more since his one-person part-time staff is also away and there is a problem with the automatic watering system.
So it's just Xue Yang, some of the snapdragons and some lemon cupcakes, the latter of which don't fit their color scheme, but it's too hot for a lot of the chocolate-based stuff. Besides Xue Yang has run out of inspiration and craved lemon. Maybe he, too, needs a holiday. Or some vitamin C supplements.
It's so hot and quiet, Xue Yang is growing sleepy, so he startles badly when Xingchen suddenly turns up in front of him. He's dressed all in white today and looks a little like a sexy physiotherapist. He's also not smiling. Xue Yang hopes he didn't get any mean comments again, online or in person.
"Do you have a moment?"
"Sure." Xue Yang looks around and sees no customers nearby. So he puts up the 'On break' sign at the front and pulls out the second chair towards the back of the stall.
"So what's up?"
Xingchen gives him a look. On closer inspection, he looks a little mean himself today, the way Xue Yang had (erroneously) pecked him when he first laid eyes on him. It... does things to him.
He brushes those thoughts away, though. The least he can is not mess Xingchen around further.
"So I was happy business was picking up. But you know, after a while... I couldn't help but notice that most people seemed to be... friends of friends, I guess."
Oh. Xue Yang quickly tries to come up with a convincing response. "Well, makes sense, don't you think? Word of mouth is not a bad advertising strategy-"
"A-Yang", Xingchen interrupts. "I spoke to Song Lan and he told me you were trying to help me with my business."
That snitch.
Xue Yang opens his mouth, but no words come out. At least Song Lan seems to have kept his words regarding the other stuff, but still, this is embarrassing, for both him and Xingchen. It wasn't meant to come out.
Xingchen sighs. "You didn't have to do this, you know." He shifts restlessly on the chair.
"I mean... why did you do it, anyway? Obviously, just telling your friends about it is nice, but this seems a little... uh, more than that?"
Xue Yang can't work out if Xingchen's angry, but he doesn't seem to be happy.
"I... we just wanted to help." Xue Yang says defensively. "Song Lan helped, too. What did he tell you, anyway?"
"Kind of the same thing, but he said you initiated it, so I should talk to you."
That Snitch, traitor and coward. Xingchen really looks unhappy.
"I didn't mean anything bad by it", Xue Yang assures him. "You seemed sad because you didn't sell a lot, so I spread the word.
Xingchen sighs again. When he continues speaking, his voice is shaky. "That's nice, but... It sounds a bit as though you're pitying me? Was it all just out of pity? This, the kiss..."
Xue Yang can't believe his ears. "Have you looked in the mirror recently? Or ever?"
Xingchen's voice is bitter. "Then what? You liked me or wanted to get laid, fine, but instead of telling me that or whatever, you thought I was too naive to function on my own, so you just had to swoop in and help me?"
"What are you talking about? No. I mean, yes, I wanted to hook up with you, but who wouldn't. Just ask Song Lan", Xue Yang adds, uncaring now of whether this is something he should share. Xingchen doesn't look surprised, anyway. Maybe those two were hooking up all along.
It's none of his business, but it leaves a bitter after-taste all the same.
"But I guess you already knew that. Song Lan probably told you himself."
Then Xingchen's words catch up to Xue Yang through the fog of his emotions. Now, where has he heard that before?
Before he can think on it, Xingchen gives him a dirty look. "Nothing much happened between me and Song Lan, not that it's any of your business."
Nothing much? That implies something.
Xue Yang's mouth is faster than his brain yet again: "How come? I thought you liked him and I'm pretty sure he likes you. He never brings me lunch and you call him gege and he says what you do is admirable..."
Fuck, what is he trying to accomplish here? Xingchen has gone really still and Xue Yang doesn't know if it's because he's thinking or because he's just going to flee from all this confusion and weirdness, to Song Lan, who's much less complicated.
Then Xue Yang remembers where he heard those words before, about Xingchen being naive - it's what the asshole ex said. All at once, other bits of conversation come back to him, fitting neatly together like a puzzle: Song Lan, Wei Ying, Nie Huaisang, Meng Yao...
"I did it because I like you and I didn't want you to feel sad, after those horrible comments online. Maybe it was overbearing, but what's the harm in having more business?"
Xingchen looks at him, no longer looking mean and bitchy, but wide-eyed and lost and maybe a little tired. That's better, right? That was a pretty good speech? Maybe Xue Yang should add something about how great Xingchen's art is?
Xingchen gives a tiny smile. It's a far cry from his usual happy, radiant beam, but progress, Xue Yang thinks.
His gut disagrees. He feels like he's going to throw up.
The thing is... Xue Yang is not Meng Yao. Not that Meng Yao would probably ever get into a situation so stupid and of his own making, no less. Anyway, Xue Yang is more impulsive.
Still, the words won't tumble out this time. He has to take a deep, jittery breath and just say it. It's not like he's got reason to be scared anyway. Xingchen's not scary, and besides, if he won't say anything now, they'll never even be able to remain friends, the way this is going.
"Especially because I was the one who wrote the review that was posted to Twitter in the first place. I didn't write any of the rest, though! And I'd only seen pictures of your art when I wrote it and I deleted it weeks ago..." Breathless, Xue Yang trails off.
Xingchen's face has crumpled a bit. He pauses. "I don't know what to say."
Xue Yang doesn't know what to say either. He looks around for inspiration desperately. "Do you want a lemon cupcake?"
"I'm lactose-intolerant." Oh. That explains that. "And I don't really like sweets, sorry."
Still so polite. There is a pause.
Xingchen sighs. "Thank you for being honest. Albeit belatedly. But... As I've said. You don't have to like my stuff, Xue Yang. But I just can't help feel that you made a fool out of me, for all these months we've known each other. I'm not sure I can just go back to... being friends. If we ever even were friends."
He gets up. "I just don't understand what you were thinking."
Xue Yang wants to make his case, but his mind is reeling. "I've written bad reviews on other vendors, too. It didn't seem like a big deal. It wasn't meant to be serious..."
He realizes this was the wrong thing to say.
"How old are you?" Xingchen asks. He sounds exasperated, and only shakes his head, when Xue Yang replies defensively: "I just turned twenty-seven."
"...you can write bad reviews, sure, but why would you... I thought you liked me... Do you get how stupid I feel now? Never mind. Let's talk some other time."
He leaves abruptly and Xue Yang is alone again. There's no customers, no Xuanyu, not even Song Lan. A-Qing is alone and she's no fan of Xue Yang on any day.
The lemon cupcakes look like failure; the snapdragons' whispers in the breeze sound like judgment.
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The Xue Yang of old would have brazenly continued turning up at the market, would just have tried twice as hard to out-earn the others. Would have thought 'fuck the haters'. It's pointless to muse too much about that, though, because that Xue Yang would never have admitted to being in the wrong.
The Xue Yang of today feels he has no choice, even though it all sucks.
He doesn't consider himself a coward or a quitter, but what's the point of turning up at the market now? He'd try to make it up to Xingchen, but he doesn't want to be more yandere. Song Lan will side with Xingchen, when he sees how he feels, and rightly so. Wei Ying and Nie Huaisang always seem to know everything and while Xue Yang still doesn't really feel ashamed, he does feel too exhausted to fight his case if everyone gets pissed at him for the reviews or whatever.
Why did he ever think people like him go places, anyway? Meng Yao is an outlier and only partly like him, anyway, what with his upper class father.
"What do you mean, people like you? Then what about people like me? You don't think people have opinions on that, trying to drive us out of business?" Xuanyu says, sounding more plaintive than angry when Xue Yang finally comes clean to them (the change of pronouns is new, they're just trying stuff out, but clearly Xuanyu still feels a bit worried about it, what with the all the terrible opinion pieces in the news).
"Listen, if anybody does or says anything or even looks at you the wrong way, tell me, and I will-"
"Hopefully not commit any crime." This time, Xuanyu sounds dry. "I did tell you not to do anything stupid when checking out the vendors, though, didn't I?"
Brat. They're right, though. Xue Yang sighs.
"I think you should come back, anyway. You know I never wanted to do this alone. Besides, I don't think anyone's angry any more, Song Lan even asked after you and Xingchen's always super nice to me..."
"Of course he would be. You never did anything wrong and he is a nice person." Xue Yang does feel guilty about making things more difficult for Xuanyu and already misses being his own boss (mostly).
"What will you do now, anyway?"
Xue Yang feels like throwing up again. Maybe he should see a doctor (he won't).
"Get a job, of course, what else?"
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First, he meets up with Qin Su though, partly because he doesn't want to face Meng Yao (they did talk on the phone and Meng Yao was resigned and not particularly worried, though he did call Xue Yang out on his conduct). Qin Su is the more sympathetic of the elder Jin kids, though (well, Xue Yang doesn't know Jin Zixuan very well). She's also great at giving advice.
The meeting at Qin Su's fancy downtown apartment also offers an opportunity to finally get laid. Afterwards, they lay in her king-size bed. Xue Yang already feels better; he'll probably be back to normal now.
He ignores Qin Su half-teasingly muttering about how they're growing too old to be hooking up and how she needs a serious relationship with somebody on her level (rude, but fair). It's easy to ignore her, too, because his phone flashes. Xingchen has updated Bright Moon's social media.
His heart clenches. Yeah, okay, maybe Xue Yang won't be back to normal any time soon.
"Is that the guy?" Qin Su asks, leaning in.
"He's called Xingchen," Xue Yang replies automatically as Qin Su takes his phone from him, looks through Bright Moon's post.
"I thought you said his pieces were bad. They're cool." She sounds serious, not at all like she's teasing. "You're such a philistine. Don't you know such things are subjective?"
Xue Yang shrugs. "He never sold much."
"Well, as you know it's not easy to sell things, that's no way to judge quality... Speaking of which, are you sure about leaving Sweet / Vicious? I mean, I get that you upset him and want some distance, but to be honest, this all seems a bit dramatic."
"No, I'm not sure, but..." Xue Yang trails off. Everything just feels wrong now. He's got a new job in some bakery. Like most jobs, it's crap, but who cares?
"I mean, he probably wouldn't want you to ruin your career over this, you know? Especially because that doesn't even help him" Qin Su continues, undeterred. "There must be something else you can do to redeem yourself or whatever. Though you probably should leave him, uh, Xingchen alone after everything..."
Xue Yang gets up and starts getting dressed quickly, uncomfortable with real talk as usual.
"How much money are you going to be able to save now? None? Also, I know Xuanyu misses their business partner-"
"Got to go, jiejie. Thanks."
"You're not thanking me for sex, are you? That's a bit... Xue Yang, listen-"
But the door is closing and Xue Yang can barely hear her anymore.
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He knows Qin Su's right, about most everything she said, and he's way too emotional about all of it. It's too late, though.
Summer's fading and Xue Yang works in the painfully average bakery slash cafe and tries to ignore his manager so he won't get into constant fights. He still bakes for Xuanyu to still be able to sell cupcakes, but much less than before.
He's taking his newest creation into work: vegan Matcha cupcakes. In fact, he's just taken a seat outside for his break with two of them in his lunch box, when someone stops right next to him.
Xue Yang, who doesn't react well to people sneaking up on him, looks up with narrowed eyes, only to almost drop the lunch box. As if by some magic, it's Xingchen.
"Hello, a-Yang," Xingchen says as if they met yesterday instead of several weeks ago under questionable circumstances.
"Hey," Xue Yang replies eloquently. "Gege," he adds and Xingchen smiles.
He gestures to the chair opposite Xue Yang, empty apart from his bag (Xue Yang did not want some rando to sit down there). "Mind if I sit?"
Xue Yang still hasn't found his voice, but he manages to shake his head and scoop up the bag. Xingchen sits down. On closer inspection, he seems nervous, too.
Xue Yang isn't sure why he would be. He's not done anything wrong.
Xingchen's still wringing his hands anxiously, though.
"Do you want something to drink?" Xue Yang asks finally, but Xingchen shakes his head.
"Don't worry." Xingchen straightens up and faces Xue Yang properly. "I actually just wanted to apologize. I didn't mean for you to have to give up your part of the business. I know it meant a lot to you."
Xue Yang shrugs a bit moodily. "You don't have to apologize and I've already been told I'm being dramatic or whatever. But it just felt weird. Maybe I wasn't cut out for it."
Weirdly, he doesn't mind admitting this in front of Xingchen, who only hums thoughtfully.
"Besides, I'm the one who should apologize. Again. It was a stupid, immature thing to do and I also knew how important your business was for you."
To his surprise, Xingchen shakes his head. "I don't think it's the same. I never really thought I could make a living out of it, but you were. I know some of my pieces weren't too professional. I'm working part-time again now, anyway. I think you're kind of missing the point what I was trying to do."
Xue Yang isn't following, but he is kind of mesmerized by Xingchen. It's suddenly sinking in that he's here, that he must have asked somebody about Xue Yang's whereabouts. That he wanted to find him.
"I still don't quite understand why you wrote that review, though. Why you gave other vendors bad reviews. I think that's what bothers me more than the fact that you did it."
It takes Xue Yang a moment to realize he's being asked a question. He shrugs helplessly again. "I was just stressed, okay? I wanted things to go well for me and Xuanyu. It seemed like a good idea to level the playing field, you know?"
"I'm not sure I do," Xingchen says after a moment. "Though I think that does mean that you care so much more about succeeding than I have ever done with anything. Which probably means you are more cut out for it."
Xue Yang still only half-follows, but Xingchen doesn't sound angry or hurt anymore. If nothing else, this is also finally a chance to ask some more questions of his own.
"If you never thought you'd succeed, why did you do it?"
Xingchen looks a bit amused. "Just because? As I said, I suddenly had a lot of time on my hands."
He smiles at Xue Yang. "Do you really want to know? It's boring."
Xue Yang nods. Nothing about Xingchen has ever been boring.
"Well, I didn't get much of a chance to be creative as a kid. My guardian was a nice person, but she only cared about academic success and that I'll eventually be a doctor or lawyer. In my school, only "serious" subjects mattered. Then, when I went into a not very lucrative career and turned out gay, m my guardian disowned me. So, I just wanted to make up for lost time..."
Xingchen has grown serious. He's picking at his nails. "I started doing art and crafts projects for fun, but Johnny... Jonathan... He was always so negative about it. We got together when I was quite young and he was kind of bad for me, I realize that now. He always said I had no life-skills or real talents and couldn't function on my own. And he lied to me. About this, I hope, but I mean also about other things, like his hook ups."
Things have started to make sense for Xue Yang. Poor Xingchen. Xue Yang normally can't spare much pity for others, but Xingchen really deserves better. Hopefully he finally has gotten together with good guy Song Lan...
"So that's why maybe I reacted a bit sensitively to you," Xingchen concludes.
Xue Yang only nods. He understands and Xingchen seems to have forgiven him, but it's too late for them now, right?
"It was nice of you to find me and say it. And you weren't too sensitive. It's understandable," he says when the silence stretches. He remembers the cupcakes. He shows them to Xingchen.
"Do you want one? Dairy-free and not too sweet." This is true - they're not sweet enough for Xue Yang.
Xingchen seems startled, but takes one. He nibbles at it. "They're good!"
Xue Yang has to laugh at that, in spite of everything. "Don't sound so surprised."
"Sorry." Xingchen smiles back. "I really don't like sweet things, normally. But you're good. Speaking of, you should come back to the market. To Sweet / Vicious."
"Really? After everything?"
Xingchen leans in. He puts a hand on Xue Yang's. Xue Yang stares at him.
"Yes," Xingchen says emphatically. "Everyone misses you. What you did was stupid, but it really wasn't that big of a deal. I was hurt and confused, but you were always nice to me in person. I saw how nice with you are with Xuanyu, how much you care... Even Song Lan said..."
Ah. Xue Yang was wondering when he'd come up. Though he's struggling to process everything. Since it doesn't matter anymore though, he can finally say it.
"You know, before everything, I kind of... wanted to ask you out. But I knew you liked Song Lan."
"Well..." Xingchen starts. His hand is still on Xue Yang's, confusingly. It's warm, his fingers slender and pretty.
Xue Yang is a little exasperated with all the emotions. "Only natural that you are, I guess, he is very good-looking, a good chef and an alright person", he says before he can stop himself. Well, it's true, although he's hardly helping his own case here.
"He is", Xingchen says. Xue Yang's break might be over, but he doesn't care. Xingchen's admittance that Song Lan is attractive does nothing to cheer him up.
"But it's nice to hear you wanted to ask me out. This is kind of why I'm here, though." Xingchen says suddenly. "Song Land and I both missed you and I... we had a ...bold and unique idea."
In spite of all his confusion, Xue Yang can't help but smile at that. Bold and unique, that's Xingchen. "Yeah?"
"We both like each other and Song Lan. He and I are kind of dating now and he likes you. So..."
"Huh?"
Xingchen laughs again. "Maybe the there of us should have a conversation to discuss our future. If you're interested."
"A three-way?"
"Three-way date, yes. I mean, I'm not saying this has to be some long relationship, but like, the option at least would be nice, since we clearly enjoy each other's company..."
"Wait. You like me, too? And Song Lan enjoys my company? Are you sure? After everything?"
Xingchen giggles, blushing cutely. "That's what I said, didn't I?"
"Okay." Xue Yang should feel embarrassed at how keen he is, but he just doesn't care anymore. Not even the possibility of a long-time relationship scares him too much.
Xingchen smiles and gets up. "I need to go and I think you need to get back to work? You should think about coming back to the market, though."
"Do you think that's a good idea if we really end up dating?"
Xingchen laughs. "Well, I don't think it could get much worse. I feel at least we now know each other." He grows serious. "You should have always been honest with me, though."
"Yeah, I know," Xue Yang admits after a pause. "I didn't know how, though. You don't tell a parent that you think their baby is ugly, do you? Besides, I was wrong. The baby was pretty."
Xingchen laughs, but then shakes his head. "Don't do it again. I prefer honesty."
"I'm being honest. I still have that ghost! Ask Xuanyu!"
Xingchen just smiles and hands him his phone. "Number, please?"
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Turns out it's kind of hard to sync their schedule, so they agree a video call date to arrange the actual date. If this is what three-way-dating or hooking up, for now, is like, Xue Yang is not sure he's into it. Then again, if it means he'll be closer to Xingchen and have sex with Song Lan at least one more time, well, he'll take it. Everything else - well, time will tell. It's worth a try, at least.
Now, Xue Yang's in his bedroom (he's phasing out work at the bakery, thank goodness), Xingchen is in a living room with countryside out the window (still crashing on his friend's couch, evidently. That red and black hoodie on the chair in the background looks familiar, by the way, but Xue Yang can't place it) and Song Lan is in his work kitchen, it seems.
So far, this has been going astonishingly well - Song Lan is more laid back than he used to be and Xingchen was just happily telling them how he's started getting positive interest online and even people asking how they can order.
"A lady called Qin Su from Jinlin Tai, even. I know the company has a mixed rep, but she seemed nice and I guess there's no reason to say no..."
"Qin Su?" Song Lan asks, but thankfully doesn't say anything else.
Xue Yang gets a message, though. "Isn't that Xuanyu's half-sister? What did you do now, Xue Yang?"
Xue Yang only says: "Well, the internet exposure was good after all! I'm sure it's nothing weird, some people just like your pieces."
He messages Song Lan back: "I did nothing other than show her Xingchen's social media. Really this time!!!"
Song Lan tells Xingchen to take the chance, but Xue Yang's mind wanders. He's happy, sure, but the fact this might be more than just sex makes him a little uneasy. Plus, they've not even had sex or talked about having it as a three-some. This needs to be remedied. He suddenly has a horrible thought.
He interrupts Song Lan and Xingchen's conversation, which has moved on to something inconsequential anyway, like holiday destinations.
"What if we're all bottoms?"
Song Lan stares at him for a moment, slack-jawed, then starts laughing, a guffawing laugh that makes him look very young.
"That's easy", Xingchen cuts in cheerfully. "We'll just bring in a fourth."
Song Lan laughs even more at that; he might pull something at this rate.
Xingchen only giggles. "Didn't you guys already have sex successfully at least once, anyway?"
"That was ages ago", Xue Yang grouses. "Preferences can change."
"Maybe we both changed, so we'll match again", Song Lan says and winks. Unlike Xingchen, he can actually wink. Xue Yang can see himself blush a little on the video.
Joke's on Song Lan, though because Xingchen happily says "Anyway, no worries, I'm 'verse", and Song Lan's face turns red like the tomato he's been chopping in the background. Haven't they had sex yet? Were they waiting for him after all?
It doesn't matter, Xue Yang supposes. Song Lan's probably imagining things in great detail, and who can blame him? The possibilities are endless.
Xue Yang leans into the screen with a smirk: "Bring it on then."
It might be late September now, but for once, the future's bright as a summer's day.
✿✿✿✿✿ Fin ✿✿✿✿✿