Chapter Text
Escapism. Oftentime this word is used to describe reading or acting or doing some activity to escape from the terrible reality we live in. Taking a few hours from your day to disappear to another world and pretend like you’re someone else. Daydreams and roleplay games, so many different ways to do it, so many different ways to forget who you are, or the problems you’re dealing with.
For Wooyoung, his escapism was an actual escape. His life was falling around him, walls breaking down that he had held at bay for such a long time he forgot they weren’t part of his original foundation. The city had begun closing in, and eyes were threatening to turn on him, and he didn’t want to be seen anymore. The one pair of eyes he did want, he couldn’t allow them to turn their healing gaze on him. So he ran away.
He wasn’t sure how long his escape from his old life would last, but maybe he hoped it was a permanent escape. Wooyoung wasn’t quite sure what he was hoping to get out of it, but what he knew he wanted first was peace. So he found a cute little beach side town, barely even a tourist spot, and piled his few belongings that he deemed necessary to take in his car and drove the nearly three hours until the view of the ocean blessed him. To the little town north of Gangneung.
Sure, there were places closer to Seoul, but people might be expecting that. He thought about going even further south, but there was no real need. The only people who knew even close where he was going was his friend and roommate, Jangmi, just in case something did happen to him. He needed an emergency contact on this disappearance. She was the one who gave him the idea to run away for a while and get himself in check. It was also her idea to get a new phone and number, so that he didn’t have to fully cut off his old life, but if he didn’t want to be bothered, it was as easy as leaving the phone behind.
Speaking of phone, he pulled up the map again, finding himself confused by the direction his GPS was sending him. The swirling directions up and down hills sent him all through the little town until he was pulling into the parking lot of the boarding house. It was small, maybe a total of six rooms if his math was right. It looked well kept, he thought, climbing out of his car, buffeted by the salty sea breeze.
Walking into the main hall, he pushed back his wind swept hair, looking over to a counter where an older woman sat behind it, glasses falling down her nose which was pointed at a magazine. Amusingly, her hair was a warm shade of orange, almost like foreigners with their ginger hair, the thick length piled on her head in a messy bun. Her eyes crinkled at the corners as she looked up and noticed him when he stepped up to the counter.
“Oh dear, I’m so sorry. How long were you standing there before my old eyes even noticed you?” Her tone was playful and slightly deeper than he was expecting, and he wondered if she was a smoker.
He waved a hand, smiling. “Oh don’t worry, I was just admiring your beautiful hair.”
Giving him a pleased smile, she patted her head. “Flattery will not give you discounts.” She leans in conspiratorially, winking. “But it might give you extra helpings when I cook dinner.”
Wooyoung smiles, amused. “Oh, so the home cooked meals weren’t just a bargaining chip to find boarders?”
She beams, letting out a hearty laugh. “It was, but it was still true. I used to run a restaurant before this place and I miss feeding people, so I don’t mind doing it.”
“Well, as someone who doesn’t cook, I will greatly appreciate it.”
A moment of eye contact and smiling passes and she gasps. “Oh, I’m so sorry, you’re here for more than flirting.” He laughs, nodding. “Sorry, sorry. I’m Mrs. Choi, but the tenants usually call me Auntie. Umm, what was your name dear? Did you have a room booked or…?”
“Jung Wooyoung. I was hoping for at least two weeks. Though, depending on how good your cooking is, I might stay longer.” He winked at her, and she gave that pleased smile again.
“You better stop or I’ll scoop you up and have a new husband.”
Wooyoung barks out a laugh, enjoying her energy already. “I’ll hold you to that.”
Beaming, glowing from the interaction, she begins clicking away at her computer. “Here we are. Room five on the second floor.” She hands over some keys. “Do you need help moving your stuff? I can get my son to help you.” Mrs. Choi looked around. “He’s around here somewhere.”
He waved a hand though. “I only have a few things, don’t worry about it. I appreciate the offer though.”
“Okay dear. Dinner is at seven. We have a little dining area down the main hallway all the way to the back.” She points in the direction. “Off the kitchen there is a little area to do laundry, though for a little extra, we do it for you.”
Nodding, he smiles and bows. “I’ll keep that in mind. Thank you, Auntie.”
“Enjoy your stay at Sunny’s.”
Paying in cash was thankfully not even questioned. Doing this much might be taking it a bit far, but he wanted to make sure the peace he got was absolute. Though, if anyone truly wanted to find him, they would, he doubts anyone would go through the trouble. He returned to his car, and grabbed his two suitcases and backpack, carrying them up the stairs and into room number five.
The room was simple. There was a full sized bed in the center of one wall, a side table on either side. Across from it was a long dresser, and an old flatscreen tv sat on top of it. There was a small table with two simple chairs and across from the main door was a sliding glass door that went out to a little balcony that maybe had room for one or two of those small chairs. It was humble, and quaint, but it smelled and looked clean.
Thankfully they had wifi, so he could just rely on his laptop when he actually needed something to entertain himself. Wooyoung opened one of the drawers to see it was clean inside as well, and began unpacking his clothes into it. Part of him wondered if it was even worth unpacking, but who knew how long he would be here. This could become his home for more than just two weeks.
After unpacking his clothes, he carries his bathing items to the wet bathroom, thankful that there weren't shared bathing spaces. It wasn’t that common anymore, but it hadn’t been advertised whether it was one way or the other. Moving back into the room, he pulled out his cords and phones, placing them beside the bed.
Sighing, he grabbed his newer phone, and his wallet and keys and left the room. Coming down the stairs, he found Mrs. Choi was still reading her magazine. Walking up to her, she smiled up at him, putting it down. “Any decent coffee places around here?”
“Oh, there’s a little shop that’s just called Meokja. They’ve got really good coffee though. The owner is a family friend. It’s three blocks down, on your left, can’t miss it.” She points right, towards and out the door.
Wooyoung smiles, bowing. “Thank you, Auntie.”
“Be safe dear.” She waves as he leaves.
The skies are slightly cloudy today, and he hopes it isn’t always like that. The buildings were haphazardly piled side by side, but it was a comfortable feeling walking through the streets. A couple blocks down from the boarding place seemed to be the shopping area of the town. There were clothing shops, restaurants, a game store, a general store, even a bookstore, which he took notice of and tried to remember for later.
He found Meokja, and found a cute little cafe with brick walls and a large front window. Walking in the door, he smiled taking in the warm coffee smells and the smell of breads and sweets. There weren't that many people in here, but he took notice of two relatively young men behind the counter, one of whom smiled as he walked in.
“Welcome.”
Smiling, he stepped over to the counter, looking up at the menu on the wall behind the counter. “Hi, can I just get a regular hot latte and something sweet to go with it. Surprise me.”
“Of course.” The man, maybe a couple years older than him, turned to begin making his drink. His hair was bleached, and his facial structure was on the sharp side, but it only made him that much more handsome. When he turned, Wooyoung took a peek at his name tag; Seonghwa. Such handsomeness hidden away in this small town? Hmm.
His coworker held a more serious look, though easily as handsome. The name tag said Hongjoong. The man’s face was stuck in focused work as he helped another customer, but when he turned to speak to his coworker, it softened and his smile was small but transformed his face. Cute.
Seonghwa returned with a steaming latte and a slice of some cake on a small plate. “Red velvet.” He explained, when Wooyoung smiled, pulling the plate toward him. “He makes all the deserts.” He motions over to his coworker.
“I’ll be sure to tell him how good it is.” Wooyoung laughing, holding out the money for the items.
He laughs, taking the money. “He gets really red in the face when someone compliments his food. It’s the only thing he gets nervous about.”
“That’s cute.” He offers, taking back his change.
“Very cute.” Seonghwa muses, smiling over to his coworker who isn’t paying attention to them. “Enjoy.”
“Thank you.” He takes his drink and cake and moves over to an empty table by the window.
Pulling off his backpack that he had brought, he pulls out his laptop. Opening it up, he opens the fresh doc, staring at the ‘chapter one’ at the top of the page. The page had been blank for nearly two weeks already. It wasn’t the reason he had run away, but he hoped the solitude and distance would kick his inspiration into gear.
He wasn’t originally a writer. In fact, he had been an editor for the last few years. Wooyoung wasn’t a super well known one individually, but he worked under a well known publisher. His popularity in his company had been growing, until recent events made him resign and come to this place. He had always wanted to be a writer, had dabbled in the past, but it wasn’t until recently that he decided he would take the jump. It’s not like he had anything else planned during this excursion.
Thirty minutes later and the page sat untouched.
Wooyoung wondered if he should write a parody of the things he had dealt with for the last year. The secrets and the pain. Hiding in plain sight, and lying to those he wanted to trust and be honest with. Maybe he could even write himself the happy ending he wished he could have had. No one wanted the true ending. The sad one. The pathetic one where the protagonist ran away from his problems.
Sighing, taking the last bite of his, undeniable delicious, cake, he looked up as the bell over the door was disturbed. Oh. His lip found itself between his teeth as he took in the handsome, and very intimidating, man who walked in. His pitch hair was slicked back, dark almond eyes seeming almost naturally narrowed, his full lips pouted slightly. His thick eyebrows raised as he walked in, as Seonghwa seemed to glare at him.
“You’re late. Auntie better blame you when you show up with cold cookies.”
The man’s serious look cracks as a pretty smile lifts his lips. “She’ll be fine. Can I get a regular coffee to go as well?”
“Hot? Iced?”
Shrugging, he leans against the counter, giving Wooyoung a nice view of a plump ass in tight jeans. Oh. “Iced is fine. She’s going to make me clean out one of the rooms when I get there, I know it. The tenants left yesterday and I already know she’s gonna bite my head off for not doing it then.”
Hongjoong arrives from the back, smiling for the first time, placing a container in front of the man. “But isn’t that your job, San?”
He snorts. “It wouldn’t be if she would just hire another person. She wants me to continue running the restaurant, and help her run the boarding house? She’s insane, my mother.” He sighs. “If the shop wasn’t doing so well that I could hire people to look after it when I’m not there, she would be lost in that old place.”
“Weren’t you trying to get her to sell it?” Seonghwa asked, returning with the iced coffee.
San shakes his head. “She wouldn’t when it reminds her of my dad. I think I’m going to find someone to help her on my own. Once she has the help, she’ll appreciate it.”
“Jongho needs a job. Make him do it.”
He barks out a laugh in response. “Getting him out of the house to go get a drink with us is difficult enough.”
Seonghwa shrugs. “If we threaten to kick him out he will go.”
“He’d call your bluff.” San laughs, waving the comment away. He picks up the container of what Wooyoung assumed were the cookies, and the iced coffee. “Bring the guys over tonight to have some drinks on the roof and maybe I can talk him into it. We only have a couple tenants right now and they’re on the bottom floor so we won’t bother them.”
“Drinks on you?” Hongjoong asked, wiping down the counter.
He rolls his eyes. “Of course.” San waves a goodbye, and Wooyoung quickly looks away, but he knows he’s been caught as he looks out the window and sees the man’s smirk directed toward him. His face goes hot, and he looks down at his laptop, swallowing dryly.
XXX
About an hour later the page is still blank, and he’s been scrolling through his phone for half that time, when he finally stands to leave. He brings his empty cup and plate up to the counter, and bows slightly. “The cake was delicious.”
Hongjoong’s ears turn slightly red, and he bows. “Thank you, I’m glad you enjoyed it.”
Seonghwa beams from behind him. “Have a good day, sir.”
“You as well.” He waves and leaves the cafe, thankful that the two didn’t seem to notice his earlier eavesdropping.
Unfortunately, he has a sinking suspicion that the one who did notice is going to be at his boarding place. When he enters, no one is at the front counter, but it was growing close to seven, so Mrs. Choi was probably preparing the dinner she spoke of. Wooyoung climbed the stairs and like god was playing a joke on him, San appears leaving the room just down from his, a bucket of cleaning supplies in his hand.
His serious resting face blooms into an amused smile as he notices him. “Oh, I saw you at Meokja. Did you just get in today?”
Wooyoung knows his face is turning red, and he wishes he could run and hide in the room, whose door is wide open right now. He nods. “Uh, yeah. Earlier I checked in. Is Mrs. Choi your mother?”
“So you was listening.” It isn’t necessarily an accusation, more of just a simple observation.
His face begins to grow hotter, and he laughs awkwardly. “I didn’t mean to. You were just loud enough that the whole shop could hear you easily.”
San’s face morphs into easy laughter at the sharp response. “I get that alot.” Wooyoung, feeling awkward, bows slightly and begins to step into his room, but is stopped by his voice. “If you don’t have any plans tonight, a few friends of mine are going to be getting together on the roof later. Though I’m sure you know that.”
Rolling his eyes, he tries to play off the embarrassment on his face. “Yeah, can’t keep your promise of not bothering those on the second floor now.”
“It wasn’t a promise.” His smile relaxes. “Though, if you join us, we wouldn’t be bothering you that much.”
Wooyoung raises an eyebrow. “Only a little bit.”
The smile grows. “Just a little bit.”
Why is his heart racing? Well duh, he’s gorgeous and he’s being nice. “I’ll think about it.”
“Okay. Don’t miss dinner, my mom would be heartbroken if you didn’t show up.” He begins trailing back downstairs, but his eyes don’t leave Wooyoung.
He laughs. “I would never.”
“Good. See you then.” San finally turns his face away, and disappears down the stairs. “I’m San.” He calls out.
“Wooyoung.” He answers.
Letting out a deep breath, he finally enters his room and closes the door behind him. Closing his eyes, he thinks of the pretty eyes and perfect teeth behind very kissable looking lips. He doesn’t want to overthink things, but that felt like flirting. Maybe running away to this random place was actually the best idea he had ever had.
XXX
About an hour later, he meanders his way down the stairs, lured by the smells of spiced meats. The long hallways ended in a small room that looked like a small restaurant, with four tables with chairs, and off to the left was a decent sized kitchen where San and his mother were currently plating different food. An older couple, definitely tourists, were seated at one table, At another, was a young couple, too enthralled with each other to even be aware of those around them.
That sight hurt his heart just the tiniest bit, but he turned away, finding a place at an empty table.
“Here we go.” Mrs. Choi began bringing plates to everyone, who all thanked and smiled at her. San helped her feed the others, until the only one left was Wooyoung.
The man carried two plates over, sitting one in front of him and placing the other in front of the chair next to him, smiling at him. “Would you like something to drink? Tea, soda, or beer?”
Wooyoung, not feeling as awkward or embarrassed as earlier, smiled up at him. “Water is fine.”
“Right away.” He turned to go get his drink.
Mrs. Choi settles herself across from Wooyoung, eyebrows raised. “I see you and San have become acquainted.” She raises her chopsticks, looking just the slightest bit accusatory, as if subtly asking for an explanation.
He nodded, trying not to blush. “We kind of met at the cafe, and then earlier when he was upstairs and I was coming back.”
“Oh.” Is all she says, turning her focus to her food.
San returns, placing a bottle of water in front of him with a smile, and then a couple glasses of tea for he and his mother. “So what brings you to our small town, Wooyoung.”
He sighs. Wooyoung knew he would probably have this conversation a few times while here, and might as well get used to it. “I’m kind of running away from life.”
Mrs. Choi barks out a laugh. “Most people are.” She motions over to the young couple. “Her parents want her to marry some well-to-do man, but she’s in love with that sweet, broke, boy.”
“Eomma, you shouldn’t be gossiping about other tenant’s business.” San scolds, frowning his disappointment.
She waves a hand at his remark, moving on. “What was it for you? Work, love, listlessness?”
He sighs down at his food, laughing, though there was no amusement in it. “Yes.”
“Oh, darling.” She sighs. “Well, one of those can be easily remedied here in this lovely town of ours, the others…” She shrugs, ignoring the scoff from her son.
Wooyoung blushes this time, embarrassed, but finding her endearing. “Well, really I’m just trying to get my thoughts together and figure out what’s next. Figured a place far away from the past would be a nice reprieve.”
Seeming to try to move the conversation away from more awkward conversation, San interjects before his mother can speak. “Where are you from?”
“Seoul.” He offers, taking a bite of perfectly spiced pork. “Wow this is amazing.”
“Thank you, dear.” She beams up at him. “Living in a big city like that, what was work?”
He ate another piece before answering, distracted by the food. “I was an editor for a publishing company.”
Mrs. Choi’s face brightened, poking her chopsticks at San. “Oh! Yunho wants to publish that little book of his. Maybe you should introduce them.”
“Eomma.” He sighs, rolling his eyes.
Wooyoung laughs, amused, and not unused to such things. “I don’t work there anymore unfortunately, but I don’t mind giving advice. It is what I’m good at.”
She raises an eyebrow at San, as if saying ‘I told you so’. “You said the boys were coming over tonight, right? Take the young man with you.” She turns on Wooyoung. “Make some friends while you’re here. It’ll help distract you from things.”
He laughs, seeing San try to hide his face behind a hand as he focuses on his food. Wow, he was so handsome. “That actually sounds really nice. I’d love to.”
San looks up, giving him an amused smile. “Feel free to join us then.”
Mrs. Choi beams as if it were all her idea, happily digging into her food.
XXX
“You should grab a sweater, it gets a little cold at night.” San says, walking him to his room after the meal, which amuses Wooyoung.
He nods, stopping at his door, turning and watching the nervous smile on his face. “Do you often ask strangers to hang out with you and your friends?”
San bites his lip. “Only the cute ones.”
His heart flutters at the confirmation of the situation, and he fights back a pleased smile. “Oh, so it happens often?”
“Never.” He answers immediately, eyes locking with his. “In fact, you might be the first I introduce.”
Wooyoung turns his face away, not able to hide it anymore. “Aren’t I special.”
“Yeah.” Then his face turns slightly pink as if realizing what he was saying, and he clears his throat, awkwardly looking away. “The stairs are down at the end, they lead right to the rooftop. I probably won’t be out there for an hour or so though because I gotta help clean.”
He nods. “Just come collect me when you go.”
San laughs, rubbing the back of his neck. “Okay. I’ll see you in a bit.”
“Yeah.” Wooyoung opens his door, watching the man walk away, sending a pleased smile back before disappearing down the stairs.
Jangmi would be screeching if he told her about this, he thought amusedly, closing the door behind him. Part of him wants to text her and gush over the handsome small town man flirting with him, but he decides against it. Maybe he would call her tomorrow to give her an update after he sees how tonight goes.
Eventually a knock rings out, and he doesn’t fight back the smile that takes over his face as he rises from where he was uselessly staring at his laptop screen. Opening the door, San is sporting a nice looking brown jacket, and he cocks his head to the side. “Would you help me carry some of the liquor up? They drink like fish.”
“Sure.”
Wooyoung follows him down to the kitchen. He opens the fridge where a couple cases of beer and soju sit. He hands the soju up to him and San grabs the beer and some plastic cups from the cabinets. The man leads the way back up the multiple steps of stairs. “A couple friends are already here, and the others will show up soon once they finish closing up the cafe.”
He makes a noise of understanding and follows him out the door near the top of the stairs. The rooftop is more whimsical than he was expecting. Fairy lights were hung from poles and sun umbrellas around the area. There were a few tables with the umbrellas that were used for shade. On each of the three tables were citronella candles, already lit. There was a bar in one corner, but it seemed unused for some time.
Sitting at one of the tables were two men. One was a handsome man with bright red hair. He was wearing a simple long sleeve shirt and baggy cargo pants. His lazy curious look settled on Wooyoung and he poked the man beside him. The man beside him has a boyish charm to him, and even sitting down he looked tall, dark brown hair a windswept mess as he smiled.
“Well who is this handsome stranger?” The redhead asked, giving San a suggestive smile.
Even in the darkened setting, he can see the man’s blush as he sets the alcohol on the table. “This is Wooyoung. He’s a new tenant, so be nice.” He turns to him, he points at the red head. “This is Mingi.” He points at the other. “Yunho.”
Both of them smile and nod their greeting, but Mingi isn’t done teasing. “San never invites people to our hangouts.”
“Will you shut up?” He mutters, taking a seat beside him, probably to make sure Wooyoung doesn’t end up sitting next to him.
Wooyoung only smiled, amused, sitting between San and Yunho. “You’re the author, right?”
The man looks at San, confused. “What?”
He sighs. “Eomma gossiping as usual.”
Yunho sighs, smiling at him awkwardly. “Author is quite an overstatement.”
Wooyoung shrugs. “You’d be surprised at the amount of people who don’t think well of their work who end up taking the risk and becoming quite popular.”
The man frowns, and San smiles. “Wooyoung was an editor for a popular publishing place.
He sits up, now interested. “Was?”
Sighing, he shrugs, reaching out a thank you as San handed him a beer. “I recently quit, but I have some good connections if you want to pass me your work and I’ll give it a look over.”
“You’d do that for a stranger?” Yunho gives him a distrustful look, as if this were all a joke, which Wooyoung understands.
“Well, it’s up to you. At least you’d get some professional views and criticism.” He smirks playfully. “If you can handle it.”
He narrows his eyes, but smiles after a moment, and Mingi pokes him in the side. “What do you have to lose?” The redhead turns to him. “How long are you staying?”
Wooyoung shrugs, noticing San’s ears perk up, though he tries to play it off. “I paid for two weeks. Though I wonder if I’ll even want to go back.” He takes notice of San’s pleased grin before he chases it away with a drink.
“Oh, a run away?” Mingi muses, giving him an unsurprised smirk. “We get alot of those. He was one.” He points toward Yunho, who frowns at him. Mingi’s smile softens. “I cast a spell so he wouldn’t leave.”
The boy’s face turns beat red, looking down at his drink. “Will you stop it?” His eyes look up at Wooyoung, and he can see that fear there. Yunho must not be out to many people.
Wanting to settle his nerves, he sighs. “Yeah, I broke up with my boyfriend a little bit ago and it was part of the reason why I ran away.” He feels better seeing the boy relax.
“What happened?” Oh right, admitting things like that meant questions in return.
“Umm.” He sighs, nerves slighting rising as he notices all three watching him. “Well, he wasn’t out and didn’t want to be and I was tired of being someone’s secret.”
He flushes at the collective sigh. Mingi shakes his head. “That one hurts.”
“I’ve been there.” Yunho offers, giving an apologetic look to Mingi. “On his end anyway. I’m… I’m still working on being comfortable… with myself.”
The redhead gives him a warm smile, reaching out to pet his hair. “At least we’re working on it together.” Yunho blushes, but doesn’t pull away from his hand.
Wooyoung feels his eyes beginning to water, and he hates that when he raises his hand to dab the corner of his eyes, he knows they see. No one comments on it, and San rubs his back, though he doesn’t look over at him. He sees it for a moment, what he really wanted. It wasn’t like he needed to yell it from the rooftops, but to be able to work toward something would have been a dream.
They fall into more comfortable conversations, San leading it away from uncomfortable topics, when the other’s arrive.
Seonghwa makes the group jump, screeching out his hello, laughing joyously as it earns him three glares and a surprised look. Hongjoong follows close behind, a brown bag of what Wooyoung assumed were sweets carried in his hand. Behind them, a slightly bored looking man. His resting face was similarly intimidating like San, though his face was softer and just as handsome.
“Seonghwa and Hongjoong you’ve seen at the cafe. That tag a long is Jongho.” San offers, pointing them out.
Mingi laughs. “The only straight boy of the group.”
“Save me.” He mutters, rolling his eyes, but seeming only half joking.
“He just hasn’t found the right boy yet.” Seonghwa coos, messing up his hair.
“Eww.” Mingi makes a puking noise. “Don’t say shit like that.”
Most of the boys laugh at the interaction, though Seonghwa turns his attention on Wooyoung as he pulls a chair over to the table, sitting between him and Yunho. “How did this handsome fellow end up on our roof?” His eyes turn to San, as if already knowing. “You never bring strays.”
San sighs, rolling his eyes, but Wooyoung answers before he can. “Mrs. Choi sent me up here to keep you guys in line. She was going on and on about how loud you guys get.”
He snorts, smiling. “I like you.” Wooyoung smiles. “Speaking of loud, did you bring your speaker?” He points at Mingi, who reaches down and brings up a bluetooth speaker.
The redhead offers it to him, sighing. “I’m sure it will be the same city pop playlist as always.”
“You know me so well.” He mutters, taking out his phone to connect them.
“At least put it on the other table.” Yunho grumbles, pushing him slightly.
Seonghwa stands, walking to the other table and setting up the music. Jongho sits on the other side of San, grabbing a bottle of soju and a cup. Honjoong takes the other man’s spot, relaxing back into it, and resting his hands behind his head. “We had to kick out Old Man Joon tonight again. He wouldn’t fucking leave.”
San barks out a laugh. “He still thinks it’s the old noodle shop. Poor guy.”
“Maybe we should start keeping some just for him.” Seonghwa muses, returning to sit on Hongjoong’s lap, music beginning to play.
Wooyoung sits back and enjoys listening to the group of friends talk about their day. Sometimes they bring him into the conversation, but it doesn’t take much to disappear into the background where he was more comfortable. It was nice, watching the little signs of affection between the two couples. San and Jongho didn’t seem put off, or jealous, or to really even notice the little touches, kisses, and teasing. It was a wonderful atmosphere, and he wishes he could have had this back home.
As the night goes on, people get up to dance, or to just be standing, or to wonder and yell and joke. At some point through the night, Wooyoung found himself somewhat alone with San, having pulled a couple chairs over to the edge of the roof, looking out over the little lights that lead out to the dark expanse of the ocean. He holds out his cup as the man pours some soju in it.
“Have you lived here your whole life?”
He grunts out a confirmation. “Unfortunately. Sometimes it seems like a gift to have grown up here, but other times I just want to run away and never look back.”
Wooyoung smiles, knowing that feeling. “I think every person feels that way about the place they grew up in.”
“Do you regret it?” He asks, looking over at him.
He laughs, shrugging. “It’s only been one day. Ask me again in two weeks.”
“You're going to still be sticking with me by the time two weeks passes?”
Looking over to see San’s teasing smile, he can see a tiny spark of hope in his eyes. It was easy being around him. “I don’t see any reason why I wouldn’t.”
His pleased smile blooms, and he laughs happily, taking a drink. Face growing somber, he sighs, head rolling to look at him. “Can I ask about him?”
Wooyoung purses his lips, kind of amused. “Why do you want to know about him?”
“Just curious what idiot wouldn’t do whatever he needed to keep someone like you.”
His heart flutters and he bites his bottom lip, eyes not leaving San’s. “You speak such pretty words for someone who’s only known me a few hours.”
“I’m a good judge of character.” He answers, eyes dropping to his lips. “Pretty is a good descriptive word.”
Wooyoung blushes, laughing, almost giddy. His laughter softens as he thinks of him, sighing. “He was someone relatively well known, so we had to keep it under wraps because we didn’t want him to ruin his career.” San’s smile drops, listening carefully. “But, after two years of not even really being able to have dinner together in public, it started eating at me. Eventually we got into a huge fight about it, and I broke it off.” He pauses, sighing. “During that time rumors were spreading and honestly I ran away from them instead of facing them.”
San gives him a sympathetic look. “What would it have done to you if it did come out?”
His barked laugh is humorless, not even turning the corner of his lips. “Death threats, probably would have lost my job anyway. Hate threads online and paparazzi spreading false info about me to make the public hate me. He would have probably lost backing and work, gotten hate himself, the whole nation might have turned on him.”
Letting out a deep breath, he shakes his head. “ Damn.” Wooyoung nods, taking another drink. “So it was rough on both of you?”
“Yeah. Most of my work could be done from home, so I ended up never leaving, waiting for him to come home just to have some kind of interaction with another person. We moved around often to try to get people off our trail. Even my family and most close friends didn’t know about him. Not that I’m that close with my family anyway.” He sighs. “It was just so lonely, and I couldn’t even really blame him. Near the end I felt like nothing more than an expensive pet.”
San looks out over the town. “Do you still love him?”
His smile is sad. “Yeah. It was really hard to leave because on his own, he was perfect. He was amazing, and loving, and he made my life better while the outside world made it terrible. He’s at a point in his career, where there was no going back to anonymity, even if that’s what he wanted.” Wooyoung looked down at his drink. “I feel like it was the worst mistake of my life leaving him, but also like it was the only choice I could make.”
“I’m sorry for flirting with you while you’re so obviously dealing with some really tough shit. I didn’t realize.” San gives him an apologetic look.
Wooyoung smiles weakly, looking up at him. “You’ve been very sweet.” The man’s face turns away, as if waiting for the ‘but’. “It’s not like I expect to be alone for the rest of my life.” He looks up. “I’m just a bit damaged right now.”
“Oh.” San nods slowly, understanding. “I mean, we just met, so it’s not like any expectations can be made, but-”
“But I like you, too.” Wooyoung finishes, smiling over at him. “I can’t promise anything, but I’m here for who knows how long. I just wouldn’t want you to feel like a replacement for a life I gave up and ran away from.”
San smiles weakly. “Well, no one knows who I am.”
“That’s a pretty good start.” He laughs, holding out his cup for more soju, which the man poured in. “I come with a lot of baggage.”
“I can deal with that. Are you even ready to move on?”
Wooyoung shrugs. “Are you okay with taking it slow?”
He laughs. “I’ve been single for years. All I know is slow.”
Sighing, he shakes his head, amused. “Why are we talking about a future like we didn’t just meet today?”
San chuckles softly, shrugging. “You’re magnetic. I’m willing to risk a little heartbreak for possibilities. You deserve someone who is only someone for you and not the world as well.”
“Don’t.” He feels the emotions rise into his throat and behind his eyes, leaking out and he has to dab the corners. “Look, you’re trying to make me cry on purpose.”
Laughing, he reaches out and wipes his tears, smiling warmly. “No promises. No expectations. Just getting to know each other.”
“That sounds really nice.” Wooyoung leans into his hand, the thumbs stroking his face where his tears fall.
They fall apart as a drunk Mingi appears over their shoulder, falling into their chairs after trying to jump across a different chair. San sighs heavily, sending an amused look his way as he stands to lift the man to his feet, laughter from the other’s filling the air. The night continues as they rejoin the group, no one brings up when Wooyoung wipes his face as he returns to the light.
San walks him to his room as the others make their way out of the building. He leans against the open door frame, smiling at the flushed Wooyoung. “I’m in room two downstairs if you need anything. Don’t worry about what time it is.”
He barks out a laugh. “Oh, you live here as well? That could be really dangerous.”
The man bites his lip, reaching out to pluck lightly at the edge of his sweater. “Probably.”
Wooyoung steps back into the room, licking across his teeth, laughing softly. “Goodnight, San.”
Clicking his tongue, he sighs, dropping his hand. “Goodnight, Wooyoung.” He gives one last, longing, look before turning and heading back downstairs.
Taking a deep breath, he closes the door and leans back against it, holding his chest, worried his heart was going to beat its way out of it. It was so hard not to kiss that man. The only thing holding him back was the knowledge that it was only loneliness that would be sending him into those arms so soon. Eventually, he hoped it would be something real, but right now, he didn’t want to use San like that. He was far too sweet and kind of a man to be used like that.
Wooyoung undressed and climbed into bed, thoughts of San and that other man fighting for dominance of his thoughts as he fell asleep.