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It’s been five arrests and one quirk accident already, and it wasn’t even midnight yet. ‘Patrol’ who? Hawks didn’t know her. At least not today, when the world decided to go all out on the crazy in his area. He was too tired for his shit. Not too old, just too tired.
So he dragged his feet and wings to the next coffee shop from the station that was still open past 11 p.m. There was one, which was rumored to have rude baristas, so Hawks never visited the place before. But now? It was his only chance at a decent coffee.
The bell rang, just like at any other coffee shop. There were seats and tables and a front like anywhere else. And a punky-looking barista with spiky black hair. Nothing new so far. “Hi,” he greeted them, somewhat slurring his words, studying the menu…
The doom of working in a late night coffee shop was exactly this – heroes, and sometimes villains trying to play it cool or keep low. One of these two got discounts.
Guess who?
That said if chairs started being thrown around, that was a different story, but there was a reason why Touya got stuck with nightshifts.
Whatever, he wasn't exactly a morning person and progressively got worse the closer it was to daylight. Facts of life.
"Yeah?" He didn't even bother to put away the manga he was reading, all tidying done twice over and damn tedious now.
He was down to leaning and not cleaning. He was just trying to make it through. "Take your time, bird, I'm here until seven, just hover right above me. By the way, if you need some substitute, there's a charge so no special services."
Bird. That voice and pronunciation resonated within him, quite familiar, too. Hawks blinked a few times, at the menu first, then at the barista. Black hair, pale skin, lots of piercings. Piercing blue eyes. Oh. He recognized those.
“T-Touya?!” Oh, man. That’s been some time. Meeting a friend from high school days. Well… Actually, ex-friend. Ex-boyfriend, to be specific. Yeahhh… That didn’t end well. Hawks laughed, awkwardly rubbing the back of his head.
“Long time no see! How have you been? Whatcha doing?” Since you dumped me after finding out I was trying to hit on your dad? “Part-time?” Somehow, he couldn’t imagine Endeavor letting his son work at a coffee shop. There must have been some story.
The look Touya gave him had all the welcoming affection of a hungry crow waiting at the gallows.
Utterly unamused glare that counted seconds until Keigo would be gone.
"I'd say I didn't recognize you, but you sure fill the room with those things. What's new."
Nothing was new.
Keigo looked almost exactly the same, maybe just a little grown into his costume and presence, hair more stylized. But aside from all that, still looked like the same dweeb playing flustered at the doorway of Touya's family home.
"I'm the manager, and I am invited to burn people out if needed, so don't cause any ruckus." The brief sneer was almost a smile.
Keigo always brought damn trouble, by intent or his very existence alone. Touya had been there for it a lot.
"What do you want? Liquid candy with a drop of coffee? Or something as black as your soul?"
For someone so hot, Touya surely had some freezing looks. If those could kill, he'd probably drop dead in an instant.
Fairly so, probably. Back in high school, after they used to date, Touya wouldn't even acknowledge his existence anymore.
Which was fair as well...
Given the unlucky instance of Touya walking in on him balantly flirting with his dad – or rather... Trying to get into his pants. He didn’t get far, since Endeavor strictly stopped him.
Yeah, it was the most stupid thing he had done. Definitely the biggest regret in his life.
Because… Of course, Hawks would realize too late what a great catch Touya was. Ambitious, funny, damn clever, and just... absolutely cool, altogether.
Not to mention hot. And a damn good kisser.
Oh, man.…
Hawks sighed, laughing even more awkwardly now.
"You still know me."
Touya felt his fingers heat up at the memories flaring up and proceeded to take a deep steadying breath. Maybe some frozen coffee would help him cool off after, or at least seeing Keigo walk out.
But here, the hot-headed Endeavor-offspring had to act civil with his customer. For Hawks, that meant there was a silver lining of hope for some sort of conversation that wouldn't consist of curses and death wishes.
Hawks approached the counter, leaning casually on it with his signature smirk.
"Actually, I really need something tooth-rotting sweet. I'm having the roughest shift. And day." Week, actually... No, wait. Make that the roughest year.
Yes, he was out of luck. It probably depended on who you ask, but he didn't /want/ to soar up ranks and be burdened with extra work, duties, and responsibilities.
At this point, he barely had any time for himself. The surest road to take him straight to burn-out city.
"I need sugar to keep me running. What's the sweetest you have? Except yourself?"
"Rat poison," came the reply as Touya picked a tall cup, drawing the most goofy-looking chicken on it for reference. He looked at Keigo briefly, or rather at his elbow soiling the clean-ish counter. "We lace it with peanut butter."
Nothing else but to bear the company as he got things rolling. "Everything's damn sweet in the recipes here, but sure, let me make up a signature sugar slosh. Hopefully it'll make you crash land."
Hawks laughed wholeheartedly at the heartfelt jab. To be honest, he deserved it. Just like Touya deserved the laughter for telling a good joke. (It was a joke, right ?!) “Haha, no thanks, I’ll pass on the rat poison. Might be a temporary solution to today’s misery,
but rather problematic in the long run.”
"Depends problematic for who." Yeah... it was a joke. But Touya wouldn't mind putting in a cup of that if that's what Keigo actually wanted for his own repentance. Whatever. Was Touya sour about the whole event?
Of course he was, you don't get over things like this. Plus he'd never bring anyone home ever again. Goddamn heroes, always ruining everything with hormones, or money, or power. No wonder he was in no hurry to make use of his own license.
At least, Hawks thought, Touya still looked at him. That was more than he had gotten after the incident until the end of their school days. Getting a bit daring, he came closer and leaned leisurely on the counter, watching Touya work.
So, steamed coconut milk it was, along with dulce the leche, pumps of caramel, all buried in one shot of expresso. Touya took his time. Close like this, he noticed Touya had gotten even more defined since they parted ways.
No signs of leftover baby fat, no softness except for that of his eyes, buried under bitterness and scorn. Was it mean to think the agriness looked sexy on him? Hawks couldn’t help the pang of guilt he felt. Had he ever properly apologized…?
Maybe something rushed and insincere when caught red handed and then they've never interacted since. Or at least Touya was in no rush to do so, and if Keigo tried–the paths to reach Touya had been burned. Scorched earth.
So no, no apology.
“Look, for what it’s worth… I know it’s way too late now but… I’ve been an ass back then and I pulled an asshole move on you. There’s not a single day that I don’t regret it. I’m sorry. That wasn’t fair to you.” Well, now he had to keep an eye on the process…
Whatever the concoction was that Touya brewed there, it took him surprisingly long. If he really hated Hawks’ guts so much, he might as well have sent him off with a cup of liquid sweetener. But he didn’t.
He actually put a coffee drink together. But that was no reason to be hopeful.
"Uh-huh." Touya replied, eyes set on the milk steamer, but eyebrows narrowing. "Honestly, after seeing your room first I should have known better. Wouldn't matter if you'd score me, I'd be a side dish forever." Eh, might as well pour it all out.
"I'm sure you're all grown up and all, and seeing my dad at charity parties treating everyone equally indifferent gave you such a rich insight."
Hawks’ smirk mellowed out as he listened. It would have been foolish to hope for a more… pacifying reception of his apology. “No, you’re right, I deserve this. You deserved much better and I was way too stupid and caught up in some childhood fancy
to realize how I really feel. Or what a great catch you are. Too late now, anyway.” Hawks ruffled his hair, sighing. For the first time since he started his hero career, his nonchalant smile faltered, revealing a sliver of truth – actual regrets. “And I should probably stop
running my mouth. There was a reason you never talked to me again and I should respect that.” He dug into his pocket, slamming the next bill he found on the table. Way too much for a coffee, even with a generous tip.
Hawks turned to leave, not even waiting any longer for his drink to get finished. “I guess we won’t see each other around…”
"You're always so damn dramatic, wait for your damn drink," Touya replied, pressing the door button behind the counter. The entry door buzzed and clicked, unbudging under pushing, or rattling. "I hate wasting, and I'm not drinking this myself. Also, take your damn money."
“What the…?” Hawks only understood what the buzzing meant when it thwarted his attempts at quick escape. He turned around, eyeing his ex with an arched eyebrow and irritated confusion.
These were some very mixed signals that Touya was sending. And a lot of damns for someone who wanted nothing but to bitch at Keigo. Touya sighed, equally dramatic, at Keigo's failed exit.
"Just shut up, sit down, and drink." The order was clear, at least.
The tall cup sat on the pick-up counter, reeking of hot sugar, whipped cream caramel sprinkles and all.
Hawks didn’t know what it was that made him oblige, but he dragged his feet back to the counter, taking the bill and the paper cup to sit down at the next table nearby. At an uncharacteristic loss for words, he occupied his mouth with his drink.
It was the sweetest stuff he ever had, different variations of sugar flooding his tongue and taste buds in a surprisingly harmonious composition. The sweet milk was swept away by caramel which got then evened out by the espresso’s gentle bitterness.
Smacking his lips, Hawks keened.
"It's dulce de leche with caramel. If that won't give you a sugar crash, nothing will." Touya lingered at the counter, the pout and frown more out of concern than anger at this point.
"You know what I learned since I moved out of that damn mansion? That forgiveness in a stride is just... impossible. And I learned that while, yes, I am my father's son, but I'm also my mother's child, and anger is... so fucking exhausting. Takes away whatever fuel I have."
He stepped back to steep himself a herbal tea, feeling the flush of old frustrations resurfacing.
Hawks hummed, not just at the taste but also Touya’s reflections. “Wow. And you said I had grown up,” he answered full of self-irony, then scoffed. “I always thought you were fueled by anger and spite.” Considering their steamier make-out sessions? Yeah.
Touya rolled his eyes at the remark, but eventually joined Keigo at the table, sitting opposite of him. It was only the two of them and he's just locked the door, so...
He toyed with the tea bag, dipping it as he watched the water slowly grew tinted with it.
"Yeah, I did. Spitefully, though I guess I also hoped you did go through all that, too. You know, for your own sake." Touya shrugged, steam from the tea enveloping his face.
Even sitting across the table, everything in his vicinity was a bit warmer. Interesting fact, as Touya definitely ran colder.
Cold hands, cold lips. Moments of passion and fluster, though? The heat cranked up immediately, a tragically betraying factor.
"Spite is useful, but it gets so... tiring. I'll literally spite myself into dust if that's all I feel. Anyway – I don't forgive you." He says simply, at least looking at Keigo directly. "But that doesn't cross you off as a person forever. So... glad you grew to some senses."
It hurt getting compliments mixed in with those memories, but... "I guess there is some satisfaction knowing you regret that."
The tea, the tranquility, the reason in Touya’s words. Hawks listened. And yes, it hurt, a lot. Seeing he was right, after all. That Touya, beyond all that raw energy and fire he used to have, was just… such an amazing person. Tough. And too tender at the same time.
Hawks sigh-laughed, rubbing his tired eyes under his glasses. “I don’t know, man. I still became a hero.” A hero who was used to getting a free pass on basically anything. People usually gave him whatever he wanted – willingly, eagerly even.
"Yeah, technically so did I, despite... this." Touya waves his hand at their surrounding. "Figuring things out. You can still have sass and confidence, as long as you don't get swallowed in the over-exalted glory. I've seen the smartest people stupid for that."
Hawks sipped his coffee drink, his head so empty while all the pictures from the past and feelings kept whirling around it like a typhoon. Yeah, having all you wanted sitting right in front of you, being reminded that it was the one thing you could never have… hurt .
All the more because it was himself who fucked it up. There was no drink in this world sweet enough to make that bitter pill easier to swallow. But that would be his medicine for life now. “Good for you, I guess?” Where was Hawks’ usual snark now?
Lulled in by warmth, or crippled by cold. Maybe he was just too tired. Too tired even to look Touya in the eye again after that very straightforward clarification. “And you’re sitting with me here now, telling me all this because you’re tired of being angry at me, or…?”
Why did he sit Keigo down? Probably because they would not see each other outside of hero work (or even within it) when Touya finally made his decision. Also because Keigo would not just stumble onto him again, and Touya would certainly not search him out anytime soon.
The fire wielder took a deep breath, hotter in his throat than the tea in his hand.
"Tired. You know, all the comfort I received from the few people I told was all... Hawks sucked anyway, you deserve better, he'll come crawling back. But you didn't, I didn't,
and there was no crawling – not that I’d wanted it then. It wouldn’t have made things better. Though I know you tried to reach out. Scorched earth was the way to go then. But... I'm mostly tired that it was the only way I could handle it. Or that it was necessary at all."
And, honestly… he doubted he'd see it as satisfactory back then anyway. It'd feel like both a mistake made and being settled for.
"What I mean is – do better for the next one, asshole. I suppose. I will join the hero batch sometime soon, I'd rather have friends than old sores."
Hawks stared for a while into the emptiness of the coffee house, wiped blank. He didn’t really know how any of what Touya said even registered with his hollow brain but… He did find it in him to scoff. Yeah, he got it. He was an ass who fell for all the stupid things.
Including childhood crushes. All this served him right.
“Better don’t. If you’re still not sure whether you wanna be a hero or not, better don’t. Seriously. It takes too much time and commitment. So if you’re still hesitating, better run while you can.
Besides, I’m working for us heroes to have more free time than they know what they can do with.” The corner of his mouth twitched upwards, sardonically. That was one thing he could do: Grind. At least that’d prevent him from being an asshole toward someone else again.
Hopefully.
Message received.
He emptied his oversugared, yet bitter treat in one go. “And the field is filled with assholes such as your father. Or me. I suppose you had your share of those for a lifetime.“
"It's not that I have a doubt about it. It's hard to veer off when that's all you've been conditioned for your whole life," Touya explains, suddenly chatty, much more like back in the day, reminded of his little back and forth with Fuyumi over the dinner table.
Chatty, indeed. That’s how Touya could be if he wasn’t fuming with so much rage that he was about to spit out flames if he did as much as open his mouth. And all that while Hawks’ flight instinct was running on overdrive.
"Figured I might as well do it and make it mine. Hard to find an agency that'll take me, though. The lonesome Todoroki chipped away from top hero and top blood father."
There was a bite to that, at himself as well as at his family and a father who downright cornered him even as he was no longer a favorite.
It was easier for Hawks to get up then, assisted by his wings perhaps. But it was time to go back to duty. So he knocked on the table, his trademark smile in place. “Thanks, friend . Would you let your bird out of the cage now?”
Touya was already getting up, clicking behind the counter to unlock the door. "... Sorry, I should have asked to talk, not close you off like that. Hard to beat angry habits. I figure I'll be here for a while, so... you're welcome to come for coffee. For better time's sake."
Because it was fun when it was fun. Before everything became doubtful, and a lot of bitterness was poured over it. "For what it's worth... I've been working on remembering nicer times not just the worst. It's progress."
Would they ever align well at some point? Maybe, if they weren’t acting on ulterior motives and using each other. Maybe… if they actually tried to be friends. Hawks chuckled, flipping up the padded collar of his jacket. “Sounds cool. Very much like you. You got it, Hot Stuff.”
The old nickname spilled, flushing color into Hawks cheeks – as much as Touya’s soft reminiscence and wishes for the future. The hero smiled – actually smiled. Not that ironic thing attached to his hero persona, but a genuine smile, half-hidden in fake fur.
“Those times were the best for me,” he admitted, his voice smaller than usual. Hawks looked to the door for a moment, then back to Touya. There was so much on his mind that he wanted to say, but his heart was brimming with too much to catch something to put into coherent words.
“Thank you, Touya. Merry Christmas.”
One, two steps, and a beat of fierce wings, and Hawks was gone in a gust of wind.
However, it didn’t disperse into nothing. A tiny, downy red feather fluttered down on the table in front of Touya, next to the empty cup that was still warm to the touch.
*
What an evening this was, leaving last impressions and more than enough to chew on.
Neither of them had really expected this, after avoiding each other for so long and yet running into each other by mere chance. With Christmas around the corner, the little feather Hawks left seemed like a gift to commemorate their encounter.
It was not put into the trash and, therefore, it was accepted.
And for the next year, Hawks could feel its presence, tucked away somewhat safe and warm if he bothered to sharpen his senses for it.
And sometime around this same season, Hawks was not alone on the work grind.
Fierce Flame – Touya’s newly chosen hero name – found his colleague and friend crouching on one of his favorite rooftops, glasses down, collar up, headphones on, and feathers fluffed up. Sharpened senses fully alert, Hawks was not surprised when Touya approached.
The newly baked hero settled next to him, groaning in annoyance after the non-stop rush of the day. At the very least, the annoyance translated into extra warmth radiating from him – something that never failed to draw Hawks a little closer to him.
Hawks would have preferred to be alone, at least for a little bit, even if he appreciated Touya’s company. But it was… also a lot. It has been a lot for the greater part of the year now… starting with that stupid feather he had left at the coffee shop with Touya.
That had proven to be a masochistic move par excellence, since Touya was now even more present on his mind than before. More than that, he could feel him every time Touya touched the feather, feel his breath on it when he held it too close to his face.
And those sensations, well… They made other memories painfully present, too. When Touya surprised him then, just a couple of months later, applying to his agency , it all only got worse. They were on friendly terms, of course. They had fun, they bantered and bickered, …
Just like in old times. Which was exactly the problem. Hawks did more than only regret what he had done… He missed Touya. A feeling that got stronger with each inch they got closer and each minute they spent together. So yeah… A lot to chew on.
So much it started proving to be too much for him to digest. But those were all things Hawks didn’t say out loud; they were not Touya’s problem to deal with. Touya made his stance clear. This was a Hawks-problem. He was a hero, so he’d figure out a way to deal with this.
For now, that was putting on his trademark smile, offering a wing to shield his friend from the wind and a puzzled look on his face, when Touya offered a paper cup with a sizeable croissant sitting atop of it.
"Sugared up, just the way to keep you running."
“Thanks!” Hawks took the offered gifts with a smirk.
"I'm not sharing, by the way. I earned it after that last asshat and his stupid wind quirk. Funny how your own quirk can actually signe your eyebrows." Touya huffed. "Should have had an ice quirk."
“Nothing a little make-up couldn’t fix. I think it adds to your punk look,” commented but then shrugged, taking a sip from the coffee. Really… Just like he liked it. Perfect. Why was Touya being so…? Argh . “You could always ask your little bro for help, haha.”
Sore topic, but meanwhile they were able to joke about family and such affairs, too. Within certain limits, certainly, but still… They’ve really made a lot of progress.
"Maybe when he decides if he wants me to walk it off when I'm severely wounded, or take a week off when I twist my ankle. Depends on the day." Still, Touya raises his singed eyebrows while considering a personal doctor in his hero career. A good idea in the long run.
"Thanks, though. Maybe I'll start drawing them on with some dramatic flair." The coffee helped, along with the whole moment of breath. Not taking any chances, Touya took a bite of the croissant, munching on it as the buttery taste melted with coffee.
“Talking about family and dramatic flare… Any plans for the holidays?” Hawks asked, feeling somewhat daring as he did so. But Touya seemed to take it casually. He swayed his foot off the ledge, heel bumping against the wall.
"Not seeing my dad. Lunch with mom and sibs. I'll probably stick around for the agency party. Pop on to the temple for New Year's and that's that."
Hawks noted the plans with a hum. No surprise there, really. “Sounds like quite the busy schedule. You’re lucky that the managers are so nice to let you as a newbie off the hook.” Which was unusual. But not entirely unintentional, perhaps? Who knew?
"Are you planning to be the sad bird watching sad streets again?" Touya asked pointedly, blue eyes sparkling with mischievous intent. Hawks knew that look to well. Touya always looked like this when he knew he placed a jab well.
So Hawks just scoffed, rolling his eyes a little. “Sad, sad bird, watching sad, sad streets.” Self-irony – something he was really good at. But since they were opening up recently, he still added with that unapproachable, indifferent, carefree smile of his,
“It’s not like I have family that I could visit so I’m not really missing out on anything.” He could go see Mera-san, but hanging out at the HSPC on Christmas was probably even sadder than patrolling duties… He’d be busy during that time anyway, same procedure as every year.
"Sad bird, sad streets, sad hetero winter romance movies, sad sweets drinks to pout into." Touya teased further, not sparing a single jab. He took another sip of coffee, giving Keigo an unamused gotcha look.
Ouch . Well… One thing Hawks lo– liked about Touya was that he could be so… heartbreakingly honest, finding every tiniest wound to put the finger straight into. No, this wasn’t funny anymore, but Hawks was a pro at managing his poker face.
"You should leave that big empty space sometime, put on something more
regular and mingle. It's important to keep yourself in tune with people, and not just victims," Touya offered when Hawks didn’t reply with more than a click of his tongue.
Having finally seen both in person and on paper the Commission's clear cut guidance for Keigo...
It still hurt, but Touya found himself in depth of deeper understanding of things.
"You could come to the agency party?” The proposition puzzled Hawks a little. It was his agency, after all. It was not like he could miss it, even though he wished he could. After a moment, Hawks just shrugged.
“You’ll be surprised how many cookies and gifts you get during a Christmas shift. Not to mention all the invitations to dreary galas and parties and whatnot. Don’tcha worry about me. I get my share of tuning in with folks. And yeah, I’ll be at the agency party, too.”
"No you won't be." Touya deadpans, steam still rising from his cup as his own hand works as a warmer. "You'll hop it, exchange witty smart talk and leave within an hour. You have a whole department showing you off as a hero always on the go. Checklist of questions and a bye."
Well, wasn't that just observant, mean and on point. He didn't punchline it further. Even times for sincere talks were quick and testy at times.
“Hey,” Hawks protested, rather with amusement than indignation, “I have a brand to hold up. I’m the man who’s too fast for his own good, alright?” Besides, it spared him unnecessarily uncomfortable company and attention.
It’s said that the real VIPs came late to a party and left early. Only those who make themselves rare are considered important, right? His priorities would always be hero work over publicity. And the rare act worked so far for him. So why not keep it up?
“You could also come to my lunch. Or request an evening in for oncem, so you can sit somewhere warm and have a drink, not getting slapped around by icy winds and peppered by snow – and it will snow, according to this ad-riddled app I'm using."
The longer this interaction went on, the more Hawks found it irritating. Not necessarily in a bad way, but… He couldn’t help but wonder why Touya insisted so much on him socializing and taking a break. Was he actually worried about him?
Nonchalantly, he smirked from behind his cup though, when he asked, “We’re having lunch or dinner or whatever together basically every day now. If it wasn’t for this,” he gestured in the general direction of their agency building, meaning their work situation,
“one could get the idea we were dating. Are you missing me or something?” He added a wink, and a chortle for good measure to make clear that he wasn’t getting delusionary. “But thanks for extending a formal invitation. Besides, I never believed you to be a party tiger.
More of a lone wolf.” Again, Hawks shrugged as he took a sip. “Talk about people change. Wolves are social animals, after all. Can’t say that about raptors.” Was Touya behaving weirdly or was that just his wishful thinking leading him on?
Whatever it was, it had Hawks’ flight instinct kick in. Hard. His feathers bristled, but still, something kept him glued there. Probably the comfortable warmth that Touya radiated. Damn fire quirks, triggering his nesting instincts. And now those two instincts were torturing him.
Touya raised his eyebrows at the complete omitting of his spoken words. Still, he laughed, too. "Did you actually compare yourself to a dinosaur? Didn't Jurassic Park suggest raptors actually moved in packs? Do you think your idea is better than Jurassic Park? Wow."
That was as absurd as it was hilarious and very much in character that tried to squirm out of situations.
Burying his face in his palm, Hawks stifled his laughter. “Man, you really slept through biology classes, didn’t you? ‘Raptors’ is a species of birds. Birds of prey, to be specific. Such as Hawks, y’know? But in your defense, evolution-wise, birds are sorta related to dinos?”
Modern-day dinosaurs. Yes, his mutant self took some pride in that, geeky knowledge no regular human really cared about be damned. But Touya started the geeky movie-education talk, so that was on him.
"What's biology?" Touya deadpanned, not a shred of shame in his tone or tinting his cheek. Just another sip of coffee. Slowly he was reaching the bottom of the cup, but being able to keep it warm himself always made him the slowest drinker.
Touya obviously omitted the lone wolf remark. Yeah, he wasn't exactly much social, and it took aware effort and choice to keep in check with what family or people he
cared for...
eventually, it became better to be quiet in a company that cared for him and knew how to handle his snappy word or two. Alone was nice sometimes. Lonely was a different song, and lonely was making Touya a very different person. Sullen and wandering in charred thoughts.
As Hawks laughed wholeheartedly, Touya turned somber, eyes on his friend until he caught up on the shift of mood and stopped. “Sorry, I didn’t–” “It’s not that,” Touya interrupted him right away. “Would you just shut up for a moment and listen?”
Hawks blinked, and didn’t reply. Satisfied, Touya nodded. He looked straight into golden eyes when he spoke up after another deep breather. "I'm not pulling your wing, you know? I did a lot of thinking while working.
Sure enough, hero work sure helps with sharpness for that." It didn't help with some nerves, but Touya was no coward. If anything, he's been growing attuned to his feelings. Courtesy of his mom and Fuyumi.
"I had been thinking of us. And, it's been a while since..." Since that time. And that event. Besides, it's not like his father accepted the advances, too. "So, I figured, I wouldn't mind giving it a better try this time. If that is something you'd have time for, bird."
As much as the nerd talk had taken his mind off dreary emotional stuff, Touya’s confession felt like a gap in the ground opening up to swallow him whole. (Talking about gobbling someone up.) He stared at his friend with his mouth wide open.
If it wasn’t for the lid on his paper cup, his coffee would have spilled. But there was nothing on Touya’s face that gave away any joking intent. Was he serious? Hawks blinked rapidly, as if that helped him to assess the situation right. But his brain felt like short-circuiting.
“Maybe you should pull my wing,” Hawks blurted after a moment of silence – like that one spark of circuits burning up and out. His reply made Touya crack a smile, somewhere between mean victory and just warm amusement.
Surprisingly complex and layered.
"You might have to remind me how you like it, it's been a while, and apparently flavors change, yeah?" He gave Keigo a moment to collect himself, gears turning and screen loading, obviously.
Oh my fucking god – Hawks couldn’t believe his ears. Touya was being real there, wasn’t he? He was actually flirting with him? He wanted to get back together with him? With HIM ? After… After everything? His insides dropped with the realizations rushing in on him.
He blinked, slower now. Too much to process.
“You’re serious, right?” Plain and dumb, for the burned who had learned their lesson. “You’re not kidding me.” Hawks was battling all his impulses right now; it showed in the rustling of his feathers.
"Nah. I think it wouldn't be fair if I did. And it would be rather cruel for myself if I did." Touya replied, giving himself a moment to think. "Joking, I mean. So yes, I'm serious."
There, the coffee was finally finished... and still, half a croissant left in his free hand.
"I haven't actually talked around about it much when we broke up. Natsuo and Fuyumi know, and that's it. Everyone else made whatever story they wanted."
He shoved the remaining half croissant into Keigo's open mouth. It was nice, still soft and crumbly.
"Listen, it sucked, but it's been a while since and it's different. And I can't say I click with anyone except for you, so..."
When Touya looked at Hawks again, there was a glint of burning red in his blue eyes. A warning and a promise? "One more chance for us sounds fair. And healthy, for myself too."
Not the worst of villain hunts and fights made his guts burn, his heartbeat and Hawks’ breath quicken like Touya’s words did in that very moment. They registered with him but… it was just hard to believe that all this was real. Even with the sugary taste on his tongue.
He knew only one way to confirm. One that his body has been itching, aching for days, months, years, really… Before the next blink of Touya’s eye, Hawks was right by his side, croissant pocketed away so he could cup Touya’s face.
Even through his gloves, Touya ran incredibly hot. And despite all the years passed, it felt familiar and cozy, making it easy for Hawks to melt over him and dive in for that kiss he had been longing for, firm and hungry, and somewhat clumsy with the lack of experience, too.
That...took a moment for Touya to catch on. They never quite rolled the same way as most relationships did, so he supposed this was yet another part of it.
Maybe he was even a little blind and not aware this meant much at all for Keigo.
But with the kiss--!
The tender cheek cupping, the surprisingly soft mouth, the familiar little sound Keigo made as he pressed himself wholly into the kiss. The whole of him, handa, mouth, the way his body leaned, the way his wings closed around them, all was a part of it.
It got to Touya, sparking warmth in his stomach too, and unlocked much, much-belated nerves. The anxiety that this was an awful idea, that he was embarrassing himself, or opening up for a pity party and equally pitiful attempt at catching something good.
But it also felt so... nervously delighted.
Touya tilted his face into the kiss, letting it linger for more than just a desperate quickness. However, he gulped when they broke their kiss eventually.
"You'll lose all your feathers, if you keep shaking like this." That's right, Touya thought annoyed with himself, bury your own nervousness behind a jab. A poke at the weakness that was turning his own brain into mush. "Don't know about you,
but I've been thinking for a long time how second chances are as important as first ones... hero or not. Just... be careful around me." Touya gave Keigo something of a concerned glare. "The Todoroki men are apparently fragile, so you can't put me back together a third time."
Hawks couldn’t help his own little laughter when they broke their kiss with Touya’s little jab. “They’ll come back.” That was something he would have never thought Touya would do. Come back to him… After how atrocious his ridiculous ass had been to him.
But he looked Touya in the eye for some moments, taking in his face, the look in his eyes, the little nervous quiver in some muscles. “There was hardly a day I did not think about… Us.” Regrets, but also daydreams, when he had too much time to room for thoughts to roam.
He pulled Touya into a hug, crushing tight – as if he could disappear if Hawks didn’t hold onto him tight enough. “I missed you so fucking much…” Now he could finally say it without tormenting either of them. “I don’t feel like I deserve the second time, so…”
The hug was almost better than the kiss. Almost. Maybe it was just different, with the joy and the strength behind it.
The hopefulness of it.
It was replied to in kind. And it was equally tight now that Touya could finally hold him.
Hawks chuckled, maybe a bit wetly. Yeah… Maybe this was way more than he would have ever dared to hope for. Especially out of the blue like this, without any premises, flirting, advances, or whatever. Hawks had no clue Touya was anywhere near… this .
It was just that it didn't make quite much sense for Touya to flirt. They've had their banter and dynamic that was coming up more and more naturally, in the flow of things.
In a sense, they've been here before.
In another sense - Touya was aware of the choice of giving them a chance... was on the basis of them being different people now. This wasn't picking up shattered pieces. This was moving forward, in clarity of each other's intent.
Still, Hawks wondered if Touya had any idea how he felt. Well… Maybe he’d have a chance to tell him now. “No third time. Definitely not.” He smiled, lop-sided, sniffling as his nose was running. From the cold – nothing else. He was grinning silly, buzzing literally.
"Okay. This go will be new for us." Touya assured as they pulled back, one arm still on Keigo's back, right beneath the wings. Touya reached into his coat and pulled out Keigo's red feather. "I held onto this for good luck--"
The wind blew it right out of his hand, and he almost followed it. He gripped onto the edge of the roof a little too desperately to be cool. "Er, whatever, I'll hold onto you for good luck instead."
Of course, Hawks held him tight and safe. Even if he’d fall, they both knew Hawks would catch him. They had done that before, just for fun and some thrill – jumping off a rooftop, falling until the very last moment until Hawks spread his wings and carried them back up.
The winged hero smiled. Maybe, they’d do it again, when the trust was rebuilt… and when it was a little warmer. He felt his feather dancing on the cold gust, not too far away from them. Before all of Touya’s warmth wore off, he called it back and caught it.
“Can’t lose this if it’s such a lucky charm.” He returned it to the small, soft feathers right at the root of his wings, where Touya’s hand was. He scooted as close as he could, tucking his head under Touya’s chin while holding onto him the same way Touya did.
“It’s alright. You have an entire bird to hold onto for good luck now.”
Not a thing was lost, no piece missing. Finally, he felt like he was whole again.