Work Text:
Your gaze wandered from the half-written investigation report on your screen to the watch resting on your left wrist, your foot tapping anxiously against the tiled floor. You still had thirty minutes to kill before you could get ready for your after work plans.
You were meeting with an old friend whom you hadn't seen in years. It was discussed as a casual get-together between the both of you, however, thanks to your enthusiastic coworkers, it had suddenly become an important romantic endeavor as well as the main topic of conversation within the office over the last few days.
"Of course it's a date," Yosano had scoffed, rolling her eyes as if it was obvious. "He asked you to meet him somewhere for dinner and drinks, right?"
"Well, yes," you acknowledged, "but it's just two old friends meeting up. You’re all reading too much into it." Despite your insistence, you were ultimately ignored.
"I can't believe our precious [Y/N]-chan has a date!" Dazai wailed from his desk, his inflection over-dramatic as he leaned back into his chair with his hands covering his face. "Say it isn't so, Atsushi-kun; I think I might faint!" Atsushi, seated to his right, flinched at the mention of his name. He usually tried to stay out of Dazai's dramatizations because they never ended well for him.
"W-Well," the ash-blonde stammered sheepishly, unsure of what to say as he hunched himself lower to hide behind his computer screen.
"What's with the theatrics?" you questioned irritatedly, eyes shifting between Dazai and Atsushi. "Is it really that hard to believe I have a life outside of work?"
"No, not at all!" Atsushi exclaimed quickly in defense before his mentor could add anything to make it even more awkward. "I-I'm surprised you don’t go on more dates! And, um–" His face got redder the more he struggled, his eyes darting to everyone but you for help - this reasoning didn’t explain Dazai’s dejected behavior. As you were about to interrogate Dazai directly, your answer was given by the pillar of honesty within the office.
"Dazai-san lost a bet with Ranpo-san," Kenji said blatantly from the other side of Yosano, his usually innocent and cheery tone present. You should have known; whether it was letting himself into your apartment, helping himself to your food or finding some form of entertainment at your expense, Dazai was always at the root of it in some way or another.
"Bet?" you echoed, glaring across the room at the bandaged parasite as he made an exaggerated turn of his head from being called out. "What bet?"
"He thought you'd never be interested in anything or anyone outside of work," Kenji explained matter-of-factly while inspecting the potted plant resting on the window sill. "I think he said something like–"
"Kenji-kun~!" Dazai hurriedly interrupted as he shot to his feet with open palms slammed on his desk. "Remember our talk about keeping secrets? Especially ones we don’t want [Y/N]-chan to find out about?"
“Oh, that was a secret?” Kenji asked sincerely, tilting his head with a finger to his chin. “Oops, I think I forgot.” Yosano sighed and patted his shoulder, reminding him to never take Dazai seriously.
“I don’t think I want to know what he said,” you muttered to yourself, pinching the bridge of your nose as Dazai breathed a sigh of relief from across the room and followed up with, “I don’t even remember what I said, so it wasn’t important. Your date , though--”
"You said 'I bet she wouldn't know what flirting was even if it bit her on the ass'," a smug voice interjected from the doorway, freezing Dazai in place with a sheepish expression. "Looks like you owe me at least ten thousand yen in snacks, Dazai!" Ranpo entered with a shit-eating grin on his face, a ramune bottle in one hand and an unopened bag of chips in the other.
"M-My paycheck... my poor, thinning wallet," Dazai moped, hanging his head in despair.
"That's what you get for making a bet with Ranpo-san," Kunikida, who had been diligently clacking away on his keyboard, grumbled. "Moron."
“Didn’t your wallet wash away in the river again?” Atsushi asked, earning another pained groan from his senior accompanied by the thunk of his forehead hitting the tabletop.
Since then, you had been bombarded with unwanted advice and encouragement from your coworkers, ranging from fashion and make-up from Yosano and Naomi, to manners, etiquette and appropriate conversation pointers from Kunikida. Kenji tried giving you some vegetables his family had sent him to give as a gift while Tanizaki and Atsushi said to just be yourself. Even Fukuzawa had taken some time from his busy schedule to briefly mention that you should stand your ground and not put up with anything unsavory , whether it be words, behavior or otherwise. This left you anxious and imagining just what he meant by ‘unsavory’ as you watched his back disappear into his private office.
Now that it was day-of, you were nervous as hell. Despite reminding yourself you were meeting with a friend, you couldn't help feeling overwhelmed from everything your coworkers had said to you. More than that, though, you felt embarrassed that you had never actually gone on a date before and had no idea what to actually expect. The idea of romance had never crossed your mind; there was always something more important that you focused your time on instead. Despite being in your twenties, you felt like an awkward teen leaving home for the first time without knowing how to get back on your own.
You looked at your watch again. Five minutes left, with your report nowhere near being finished. You stared blankly at the screen, your mind reeling and your stomach twisting from nerves. Your trance was broken after a few moments as you jolted in surprise from sudden movement to your left, your gaze immediately burning holes into the offender.
"Looks to me like your head is in the clouds today, [Y/N]-chan," Dazai teased in a sing-song voice as he crouched and rested his elbows on your desk, his eyes sparkling with a mischievous glint. "Or... maybe it’s on your date already." You huffed, closing your eyes and rubbing your temples as your blood pressure calmed down from his surprise appearance.
"Stop antagonizing me," you groaned, sagging your shoulders. "I'm not in the mood." He chuckled good-naturedly, using your tabletop as leverage to stand up straight.
"And here I was, about to promise you I’ll leave you alone instead of showing up at your place unannounced tonight," he said snidely, tilting his head to one side. "But now I think I'll join you for the afterparty! Does your date like board games?” His eyes widened and lit up from the possibilities as he continued, “Oh! If you were planning on letting him stay the night, we could all have a slumber party! This’ll be fun -- you should go on dates more often!" You grit your teeth, biting back a remark that you'd rather die, but that would only give him more ideas leaning on the sadistic (or masochistic) side.
As he went on being his usual annoying self at work, you started to tune him out and saved your report to finish the next morning. With his nonsensical babbling in your ear, you realized that you did feel less anxious after some familiar banter with him, which may have been Dazai’s goal all along. You opened your mouth to thank him, however your stomach dropped and the thought was abandoned. From behind, you felt your fight or flight response kick in as the delicate yet dangerous hands of the agency's doctor gripped your shoulders. Her aura radiated an immense pressure that felt like it was constricting your ribcage, making it hard to breathe.
"[Y/N]-chan," she said sweetly with her lips to your ear and her fingernails digging into your skin with enough force to nearly tear the fabric of your shirt between. "Let's get you ready for your date, hm? I have such pretty clothes for you to choose from in my office." A chill ran down your spine and your breath caught in your throat as she practically pulled you to your feet and dragged you to the infirmary with no resistance. Dazai saluted you dramatically as he watched you disappear, grinning to himself as he imagined what was in store for you.
“This is too much,” you insisted, feeling overexposed and embarrassed. “Don’t you have anything more...modest?”
“Your idea of modesty is a blouse buttoned up to your neck and your legs covered to your toes,” Yosano chided as she held your face still and applied makeup. “I forbid you to leave this office like that-- stop squirming!” She nearly messed up your eyeliner.
“[Y/N]-san, you clean up so nice!” Naomi chirped as she brushed your hair. “I wish we got to dress you up more often.”
“You say it like I’m normally a slob,” you grumbled, your face finally freed from the doctor’s grip.
“You’re acting like wearing makeup and a skirt is a death sentence,” Yosano sighed, exchanging her eye pencil for a tube of lipstick. “Honestly, a little pampering isn’t the end of the world.” As she was about to apply it, your head was tugged back slightly by Naomi putting your hair up.
“There, now we can see your face,” she said triumphantly. “Your date’s going to be head over heels for you the second he sees you!” You sighed, giving in as Yosano took your face again and applied the lipstick. You were already exhausted and just couldn’t wait to go home.
“Naomi, get the tall mirror for me, would you?” Yosano asked, capping the lipstick and taking a step back to admire her work. “I think we deserve some credit for a job well done.” Naomi went behind one of the curtains separating the recovery beds in the infirmary and rolled out a standing mirror on wheels, a giddy expression on her face. You stood from the stool you had been sitting on and took a deep breath before facing your reflection, mentally preparing.
Your cheeks heated with blush as you examined the whole ensemble: your hair, which you normally let fall over your shoulders, was done up in a loose bun with your bangs pinned out of your eyes. The makeup you felt like you had been caked in was actually light and subtle, the eye liner adding a slight pop to your eyes and the lipstick a subtle red, enough to look elegant without being too flashy. The black dress you had been forced into was slightly loose rather than form fitting with a nice stretch to the fabric, the short sleeves falling off the shoulders and exposing your collarbone without revealing much cleavage. The length of the skirt stopped just above your knees with your legs decorated in fishnet stockings and strappy black heels--not too tall--buckled around your ankles.
In short, you agreed that they had done a wonderful job. You almost didn’t recognize yourself.
“See what happens when you dress yourself up every once in a while?” Yosano remarked, checking that the zipper on the back of your dress was fully zipped. “Have some confidence and don’t stress too much.”
“You’re so pretty!” Naomi exclaimed, bouncing on her feet in excitement. “I wish I could go with you just to see his reaction!”
“Thank you, both of you,” you thanked with a shy smile, breaking your gaze away from the mirror to each of them. “I appreciate it.”
“Of course,” Yosano replied with a sincere smile. “In return, you have to tell us everything over lunch tomorrow. Deal?” You nodded, taking a deep breath while stealing one last glance at your reflection. You had been feeling nervous up until now, but that feeling has been completely replaced by excitement.
Yosano and Naomi followed you back to the main office to get your coat and your bag before you left, but you were immediately stopped dead in your tracks upon entering by the several pairs of eyes suddenly focused on you by your remaining coworkers.
“Woah,” Kenji and Tanizaki said together out loud. Yosano and Naomi stepped around you into the room, obviously proud of their work. Kenji innocently offered you a genuine compliment about how pretty you looked, which you smiled and thanked him for. Tanizaki looked you up and down for only a few seconds before Naomi had attached herself to his arm, her expression immediately puffed up in jealousy as she demanded his attention. Atsushi was blushing darkly, his gaze all over the room and landing on you every few seconds before he completely turned away, muttering to himself that he shouldn’t stare (you found this adorable). Kunikida cleared his throat and pushed up his glasses, the glare from the light hiding his eyes, as he said, “Adequately presentable.” Yosano took offense to the comment and marched up to him, backing him into a corner against his desk and questioning his choice of words as he defended and justified himself by hiding behind his book of ideals. Ranpo obviously didn’t care; he was too busy enjoying his snacks at his desk while observing the battle between Kunikida and Yosano in front of him. That left Dazai as the only one left to say anything.
He was lounging on one of the sofas with his arms crossed behind his head and feet on the coffee table, eyes following you while being surprisingly quiet. With everyone else occupied, you joined him by seating yourself across from him on the other couch.
“Nothing sarcastic or slightly insulting to say?” you asked after a few moments, crossing your arms as you waited for the inevitable.
"My opinion hardly matters, don't you think?" he countered, stretching his arms and turning his head away to look out of the window. You were thrown off by his sudden detached attitude. Of all people, he seemed to be the most involved with teasing you about your plans, yet now that it was actually happening, he acted as if he had no interest whatsoever. You were about to question him, when you heard the sound of your cell phone ringing from your desk.
You looked at the watch on your wrist and stood, realizing if you didn’t leave now you were going to be late. Ignoring Dazai and the rest of your coworkers for the moment, you strode to your desk and picked up your phone. The number indicated it was your friend that you were meeting up with.
“Sorry,” you apologized as you answered it, hurriedly grabbing your coat and your bag with your free arm. “I’m just leaving, so I’ll be there in a few minutes–”
“Actually,” he replied, interrupting you, “I’m really sorry, but I have to cancel tonight’s plans.”
Dazai saw you get up within his peripheral vision and turned his head to follow you as you walked past him to your desk to answer your cell phone.
“Sorry, I’m just leaving,” he heard you say while you gathered your things, “so I’ll be there in a few minutes–”
Then you paused and the atmosphere in the room changed. Dazai stood and looked around the partition, watching you as your body slouched in disappointment. Yosano and Kunikida stopped their arguing and everyone fell silent, their eyes watching you curiously.
“I understand,” you eventually sighed, your voice having lost all enthusiasm. You took the phone from your ear and flipped it closed, looking obviously dejected.
“He canceled,” you answered, the unasked question heavy in the air.
“Why?” Yosano immediately asked, irritated. “And why on such short notice?”
“He just said something came up,” you replied, setting your phone down. “It’s fine.”
It’s obviously not, Dazai thought to himself, frowning. Despite you being the one insisting it wasn’t a date from the beginning, everyone had hyped you up into believing it was and got your hopes up. Now, seeing you dressed up with nowhere to go while trying to hide your expression from everybody was a suffocating feeling to everyone who had contributed.
Except Dazai, of course. He wasn’t going to let you just go home miserably, especially if he could get something out of it, too.
You stepped out onto the front sidewalk of the building, your coat buttoned and your messenger bag across your body. While the cancellation did blindside you, you tried convincing yourself it wasn’t the end. You could still go out by yourself, but you were nervous about it. While debating whether or not to just go home, you heard footsteps behind you and turned to see Dazai had followed you out.
“What?” you asked with a bit more bite than you meant. “Are you here to make fun of me?”
“While normally that would be my first instinct,” Dazai replied with a smug grin, “I actually have a proposal.”
“No thanks,” you said immediately, turning away from him. “I’m going home.” You weren’t in the mood to play his games.
“[Y/N], hear me out,” he insisted, stepping in front of you to block your path. You scowled up at him, not hiding your annoyance, and crossed your arms, waiting for what he had to say. He presented a surprisingly kind smile and placed his hand over his heart as he took a breath.
“I’ll be your date instead,” he said as casually as one would discuss the weather. “Let’s go.”
Your eyes widened in disbelief, taken aback by his offer. On the surface, he seemed sincere, but you knew there must have been some ulterior motive.
“What’s the catch?” you questioned, immediately suspicious.
“No catch,” he said calmly, holding both hands up with palms forward and still wearing that same smile. “Your pitiful expression just tugged at my heartstrings when you got that phone call and I felt bad.”
“Sure you did,” you snorted, not buying it for a single second. You tried to step around him, but he again moved in your way.
“I’m serious,” he maintained, his expression now matching the sentiment. “You were excited about this, right? And all that time was spent dressing you up. Are you going to waste it?”
“I thought you didn’t care,” you argued, remembering his uninterest just a short while ago in the office. “It’s fine, Dazai. Don’t worry about me.”
“Not happening,” he jabbed back, his usual arrogant grin back on his face. “Give me the address of the place you were meeting up at and I’ll be there in thirty minutes.” Tired of arguing with him, you relented and gave him the details, watching as he took off in the direction of the company dorms. You didn’t have anything else to do, and he did have a point that all the effort would have gone to waste, so you decided to humor him.
You stood outside of the restaurant, patiently waiting for Dazai. You were trying to figure out what he was thinking, which was always a fruitless endeavor. There were parts of him that you knew, while other parts he still kept hidden. He wore several different faces at different times, and it was difficult figuring out which was the real one. On one hand, he loved to tease you relentlessly, even in the privacy of your own home, while on the other he was a dependable friend and colleague where it really mattered.
Just as you were beginning to think he wasn’t going to actually show, you raised your head when someone approached you and almost did a double take. Dazai cleaned up nicely when he wanted to; he stood before you in a white turtleneck and blue blazer, black slacks and black dress shoes with his hair tucked behind his left ear. You looked him up and down and grinned as soon as you noticed his bandages peeking out of his sleeves, the familiarity putting you at ease.
“Well, what do you think?” he asked, holding his arms out and giving you a playful twirl. “Not bad, right?”
“Not bad at all,” you agreed, “but did the bandages really need to stay?”
“How rude,” he huffed, his expression dropping in faux-annoyance. “My bandages are part of my body - either accept all of me or none of me!”
“Fine, fine, I accept you,” you sighed, unable to help your smile at his Dazai-like response. You met his gaze and continued sincerely, “Thank you for taking me out, Dazai.” His expression softened and he held out his elbow for you to take.
“Shall we?” he asked, his eyes playful. You hooked your arm around his, allowing him to lead the way.
Any apprehension you may have had leading into this had melted away within minutes of being seated. By the time your meals and drinks were finished, it had been several hours. The time had flown by, the conversation between the two of you flowing easily. You sighed after a comfortable break in conversation, your eyes surveying the other customers around the restaurant. Dazai, his chin resting against his palm, frowned in a pout and asked, “Aw, are you getting bored of me already?”
“Surprisingly, no,” you answered honestly, refocusing your attention on him. “I’m not sure what I was expecting, but I’m having fun.” You felt the creeping heat of blush warm your cheeks at your admission and asked, “You’re not bored of me yet, are you?”
“Not in the slightest,” he answered with a grin, his foot brushing yours under the table. “I’ve always found you interesting, [Y/N].” The way he said it so matter-of-factly deepened your blush and you had to look away again. Your eyes once more roved over the patrons around you until your gaze settled on a familiar looking man. After a moment, you realized who it was and your heart sank, your eyes widening and a small gasp escaping your lips. Dazai noticed and frowned, following your gaze.
“That’s him,” you said quietly, your mood soured. “That’s who I was supposed to meet here tonight.” Your previous date was seated at a table across the restaurant, a woman sharing the table with him. They were holding hands and laughing, clinking their glasses together. The intimacy of it forced you to look away, irritation bubbling under your skin. More than that, though you didn’t know why, you felt embarrassed as you recalled how excited you had been to go out with him in the first place and the crushing disappointment of having been canceled on at the last minute.
“What a catch,” Dazai scoffed sarcastically, turning back to face you with a displeased expression. You couldn’t meet his gaze, your eyes downcast on the table. After a moment, you heard Dazai sigh in annoyance before his hand reached toward you, his fingers lightly touching your chin and tilting your face toward him.
“Don’t get all upset about some other guy,” he lightly scolded, his gaze stern. “I’m the one you’re out with tonight, not him.” His seriousness caught you off guard; you didn’t expect that of him, but you knew he was right.
“I’m sorry,” you apologized, feeling even more embarrassed. Dazai hummed, raising his eyebrow and moving his fingers from your chin to your cheek. Instead of another light touch, he pinched your cheek roughly and pulled the skin, surprising you and making you yelp.
“Dazai, knock it off!” you admonished, smacking his hand away. His serious expression turned back to one of playfulness as he insisted his hand just slipped. You rubbed your cheek with an annoyed expression fixed on him, but you understood why he did it. He was always trying to cheer you up or lighten the mood, both on and off the clock.
“Let’s get out of here,” you finally said, standing and reaching for your coat. “I’ve had enough of this place.” Dazai agreed and stood as well, circling around the table and taking your coat from the back of your chair before you could grab it.
“Allow me,” he insisted, holding it open so you could slip your arms in.
“Acting like a gentleman for once?” you quipped, allowing him to help you into your coat.
“I like to pretend every once in a while,” he responded in-kind with a grin. You grabbed your bag and began heading toward the exit with Dazai in tow. You had to pass a certain table on your way to the door so you kept your eyes forward, however Dazai had other plans. Just as you reached the table with your old friend and his date, Dazai grabbed your hand and stopped you.
“[Y/N]-chan, I forgot to tell you something earlier,” Dazai said loudly, obviously for your original date to hear, who turned his head toward you at the sound of your name, his eyes wide in recognition. You were immediately embarrassed.
“W-What?” you questioned, turning to look back at Dazai. Before you could react, he pulled you close against him and said, “You look amazing tonight. I’m glad I had you all to myself.” He placed a lingering kiss on your temple before releasing you, a charming smile on his face. You stood frozen in disbelief and watched as Dazai’s eyes flickered toward the couple seated beside you, your previous date’s eyes lingering on you.
“Oh, sorry!” Dazai apologized to him in an obviously non-apologetic tone, making an exaggerated bow. “I just couldn’t help myself. Quite a beauty, isn’t she? I’m so thankful to be with her tonight!”
“Hey, do you know that girl?” the woman at the table asked her partner. The man hesitated, unsure of what to say.
“You’re old friends, aren’t you?” Dazai interjected. “[Y/N]-chan told me you had plans tonight, but something came up.” He smiled and waved to the woman and added, “Looks important. Sorry for bothering you!” You couldn’t believe what was happening.
“Dazai, stop it!” you snapped, your face burning. You grabbed his wrist and began pulling him toward the door, ignoring the eyes you felt on you from the man who stood you up. Part of you was furious that Dazai pulled such a stunt, but you couldn’t ignore the other part that felt something akin to smug satisfaction at what took place.
“You should have seen his face when we were leaving!” Dazai laughed beside you. “I bet he’s going home alone tonight!” The two of you were walking along the residential street that led to your apartment building.
“You acted like a complete ass,” you complained. “Why did you do that?”
“I’m an opportunist,” he replied simply, skipping ahead of you a few steps and turning to look back at you over his shoulder. “I couldn’t pass it up.” You sighed, slouching a bit as you walked.
“I mean, really,” he continued, stopping and fully turning to face you, “he had it coming, wouldn’t you say? He canceled your plans to go out with another woman. He wasn’t even smart enough to take her to a different place than where he planned with you.” You stopped walking as well, crossing your arms. He had a point, and when you considered everything, you really shouldn’t have been surprised at the stunt Dazai pulled. He did have a thing for theatrics, after all.
“You’re so over the top,” you resigned, shaking your head. “I hope you got what you wanted out of it.” You began walking again, Dazai at your heels.
“I meant everything I said, you know,” he said after a few minutes of silence.
“Sure you did,” you yawned, not thinking too deeply about it as your building came into view. You then felt a hand on your shoulder, stopping you once again. You turned to look at Dazai and your breath caught in your throat when you noticed his expression; it seemed almost…lonely?
“I’m serious,” he insisted, no hint of his usual playfulness evident, “you’re beautiful, you know. And knowing there was a guy who stood you up without even giving you a chance didn’t sit right with me. In fact, it made me angry.”
“You’re exaggerating,” you accused, remembering again how disinterested he seemed when you originally talked to him before your plans changed. “Yosano-sensei and Naomi spent time helping me get ready, yes, but–”
“I don’t mean just that,” Dazai insisted, his hand dropping from your shoulder and finding your own. “I think you’re beautiful all the time, and any bastard that would willingly drop you for someone else deserves what they get.” You weren’t expecting to hear this from Dazai. You thought about his disinterested behavior earlier and what happened at the restaurant before a realization came over you.
“Dazai, were you jealous?” you asked. His eyes widened at your question, but after a moment, his frown turned upwards into a lonely smile, his eyes softening.
“Yeah, I guess I was,” he admitted, running his free hand through his hair while squeezing your hand with the other. “I tried to encourage you, but when I saw you all dressed up and ready to go, I was annoyed.” He laughed hollowly and exhaled, “To be completely honest, I was happy that guy canceled, and even happier that you agreed to letting me take his place.” He looked toward the ground, his hand loosening his grip around yours. You sighed, taking in how pitiful he looked. He really was an ass, but you felt your heart swell as you took in and listened to what he was saying. It was rare for him to be honest, especially with his feelings, so you could only be honest in your response.
“Dazai, I’m glad you were the one I went out with tonight,” you said with a smile, squeezing his hand. He raised his gaze, his eyes meeting yours cautiously.
“Do you mean that?” he asked with a nervous chuckle.
“Why wouldn’t I?”
“You know what kind of man I am, after all.”
“I do,” you acknowledged. “You’re selfish, self-centered, inconsiderate and lazy.” He winced at each label, his shoulders hunching.
“But,” you continued, reaching up and tucking his hair behind his ear, “you’re someone I know I can rely on when it really matters. I enjoy spending time with you, Dazai, and I’m really glad I took you up on your offer.” In the light of the streetlamp, you saw the faintest dusting of color across Dazai’s cheeks and couldn’t help yourself; you stood on your tiptoes and kissed his cheek, just as he had done to your temple in the restaurant.
He seemed taken aback, his body unmoving as you stepped back to gauge his expression. He placed his hand over his cheek in what seemed to be disbelief.
“Nothing to say?” you asked, snapping him out of his daze. “Anyway, it’s cold out here. Let’s hurry over to my place, already.” You turned to lead the way, Dazai following a step behind you with a sincere smile hidden from your view.
Once inside your apartment, you had poured another round of drinks for yourself and Dazai to sip on. While you set the glasses on the table, Dazai’s eyes roamed over your living space, looking for anything new since the last time he was there.
“Is that a record player?” he asked, walking over to examine it.
“I found it at a secondhand shop with a few records,” you explained, setting the bottle of alcohol on the table after capping it. “Do you want to listen to something?” Dazai was already a step ahead of you; he had already taken out a record and placed it in the player. Once setting the needle in place, a soft ballad began to play with piano chords and strings filling the room.
“So this is the kind of thing you like,” Dazai mused to himself, looking at you over his shoulder. He caught your gaze and held out his hand to you, beckoning you over. Humoring him, you walked over and took his hand. He surprised you by flashing a mischievous grin and pulling you close, beginning to slow dance with you to the music.
You swayed with him in your small living room, your cheeks burning as he twirled you around the room like you weighed nothing.
“I didn’t expect you to be so graceful,” you giggled, looking up at him.
“Excuse you,” he pouted, turning his nose up, “I’m always graceful in everything I do.” You hummed in acknowledgement, your arms locked around his neck and your head resting against his collarbone. Your movements slowed into a gentle sway in place, a content sigh escaping your lips as Dazai held you against him with one hand on the small of your back and the other rubbing small circles between your shoulder blades. You never thought you’d be spending time with him quite like this, but you didn’t dislike it. It was comfortable, warm, and his familiar presence put you at ease. You felt his chin resting on your head and smiled, imagining what kind of expression he was wearing.
The song eventually ended, as did your dance. When you tried to step away from Dazai, however, he held you tighter.
“Dazai?” you questioned in a quiet voice.
“Just a little longer,” he responded in a matching volume. You sighed and remained where you were, listening to his heartbeat. Sometimes when he showed up at your place, he was drenched in river water or drunk, trying to find a way to escape life. You would rather he be with you from the start, so having him against you, warm and breathing, made you almost dizzy with relief. You tilted your head up and placed a gentle kiss on his jaw, happy to be holding him so close to you. Rather than being startled this time, Dazai reciprocated by leaning down just enough to comfortably find your lips, his eyes fluttering closed.
His lips were chapped, but they were warm. You reached one hand up to touch his face, wanting to feel his skin against yours. He leaned into your touch, taking his lips away to release a content sigh. You took a breath, meeting his eyes again; they were focused entirely on you, the soft chocolate hues almost making you melt.
“That was nice,” you breathed lamely, unsure of what else to say. He released a breathy laugh and agreed.
“I couldn’t help myself,” he replied, running a hand through your hair and pulling out the hair tie, letting your locks fall loose onto your shoulders. “Especially when I have you all to myself like this, [Y/N].” You felt his other hand toying with the zipper at the back of your dress and blushed, looking away from him.
“If you want, Dazai,” you began, your stomach fluttering, “we could have a slumber party, just like you suggested earlier today.” He grinned and tugged the zipper down a little. He moved his lips by your ear and said, “What if I don’t plan on sleeping? Will you stay up with me?” You shivered from the huskiness in his voice and the feeling of him unzipping your dress completely. You hugged him around his neck again and pressed your face into his shoulder, your face burning, and replied with a simple “yes.” He wasted no time after your affirmation; he bent down and hooked his arms around your thighs, lifting you up to carry you with his hands on your ass. You held onto him tighter as he carried you from the living room into your bedroom, kicking the door closed behind him.
You gasped, unable to make a sound, as Dazai sat you down on the edge of your bed with his lips on your throat, his tongue lapping over as much skin as he could find. Your dress had already fallen from your shoulders, the sleeves bunched and resting in the crooks of your elbows, exposing your breasts. You didn’t even try to cover yourself, too preoccupied with Dazai’s ministrations while trying to remove his blazer. When he sensed you struggling, he paused and leaned back, standing straight in front of you to remove the blazer himself. You noticed his eyes lingering on your chest as he shrugged off the garment, tossing it onto the floor.
He licked his lips and rolled the sleeves of his turtleneck to his elbows, exposing his bandaged arms, before leaning back down and kissing you again, one hand holding your chin and the other brushing through your hair. You sighed against his lips, your stomach full of butterflies but his touch comforting.
“Can I touch you?” he whispered against your lips, a needy note in his voice. His hand that was in your hair was now resting against your collarbone, slowly trailing down and lingering, waiting for your approval.
“Please,” you breathed, wanting to feel his touch. “Touch me wherever you want.” He released a breathy laugh, probably from how eager you sounded, and kissed you firmly before leaning you down onto your back. He straddled your thighs, one hand on the mattress by your head and the other sliding over your left breast, giving a tentative squeeze. He watched your expression as you squirmed and gasped at the sensation. Your breasts weren’t normally sensitive, but it was different when it was someone else touching them, and the realization excited you. While your head was in the clouds, you didn’t notice that Dazai had lowered his head to your right breast. He grazed his tongue over your nipple before taking it into his mouth, sucking it and pinching your other nipple simultaneously. You moaned aloud, your back arching against his weight. You weaved your fingers into his hair with your right hand and grabbed onto his right bicep with the other, needing something to hold onto and keep you grounded. He groaned against your skin, the vibration making you shiver.
“D-Dazai,” you whined, squeezing your thighs together. He squeezed your breast again and lightly nibbled your nipple before raising his head and releasing it from his mouth with a pop.
“You okay?” he asked, his eyes glazed over as he looked down at you. You met his gaze and nodded, smiling up at him.
“I’m fine,” you answered, catching your breath. “It all feels really good.” He returned your smile, leaning down and placing a kiss on your forehead.
“I’m glad,” he mumbled, trailing kisses from your forehead to your cheek and again to your lips. “If I do something that you don’t like, tell me.”
“Of course,” you laughed before taking a deep breath. You felt much too warm in your clothes and asked, “Can you let me up so I can take my dress off?”
“Hmm, I dunno,” Dazai hummed. “Maybe on one condition?”
“And what’s that condition?” you asked as he sat back onto his knees.
“I get to undress you,” he demanded with a cocky grin, “in front of the mirror.” You remembered your floor length mirror across the room hanging off of your bathroom door. Heat flushed your cheeks and your chest.
“Wh-Why the mirror?” you asked, feeling self-conscious. Dazai stood from the bed while holding your hands to help you up. Your legs felt a bit like jelly so he supported you with a smile as he walked you across the small room to stand in front of the mirror, him standing directly behind you and looking at your reflection with you over your shoulder.
“I think you look sexy as hell right now,” he answered, reaching forward and tucking some hair behind your ear. “I want you to see how beautiful you are when I undress you. There’s nothing sexier than confidence, after all, right?” You met his gaze in the mirror as he rested his hands on your shoulders and slowly slid them down your arms, leaving goosebumps where he touched. You stood still as his fingers hooked into the sleeves bunched at your elbows and pushed them down to your wrists. One at a time, he pulled your arms free, then moved his hands back up your arms to your shoulders. He then slowly moved them down again, this time moving under your arms and sliding down your sides. You shivered from the touch as he reached your waist and slid his thumbs under the fabric of your dress, pushing it down to your hips. Once it reached your hips, there was no resistance left and the garment fell to the ground, pooling at your ankles while leaving you standing in lacy panties and fishnet stockings.
“How are you feeling?” Dazai asked, running his hands back up your sides and over your stomach. You leaned back against him, staring at yourself in the mirror; you almost couldn’t believe it was you. The woman staring back at you with tousled hair in only panties and stockings was beautiful. A warm feeling bloomed in your chest as you accepted your reflection.
“I feel pretty,” you answered honestly, “and sexy.” He chuckled, kissing your exposed shoulder. His hands began moving once again, roving over your hips, your stomach, and your breasts. His lips moved from your shoulder to your neck, finding a sensitive spot just under your ear. You whined from his touch and his kisses, your thighs squeezing together again.
You gasped as you suddenly felt something hard against the curve of your ass. You refocused your attention to the mirror, specifically Dazai, and noticed his movements. Though he was hidden mostly behind you, you could still make out the subtle movements of his hips grinding against you in the reflection. He groaned into your neck, and you finally realized that he had been holding himself back for a while.
“Dazai, do you want to move back to the bed?” you asked, heat creeping up your neck and beginning to pool in your groin. “I think it’s your turn to be touched.” Dazai paused his movements completely and took a deep breath to collect himself before answering.
“I want to play with you a bit more, first,” he responded, taking your hand and leading you back to the bed. “I’m in no rush.”
“Are you sure?” you asked as he sat you on the edge and kneeled on the ground in front of you.
“Mmhmm,” he nodded. “Don’t you know? The longer you draw it out, the better it feels.
“Besides,” he continued, running his hands up your legs, over your knees and onto your thighs, “I’m not done undressing you, yet.”
You watched as he smiled and moved his focus to your right knee, spreading your legs apart as he placed kisses from your knee along your inner thigh. You gasped at the feeling as he got closer to your clothed center. Just as you thought he was going to move further up, he scraped his teeth along your thigh and took the hem of the stocking into his mouth. Slowly, he pulled the garment down with his teeth, over your knee and down to your ankle, before pulling it off completely and discarding it behind him. He did the same thing on the other side; slow kisses up your thigh until he took hold of the stocking with his teeth and dragged it down your leg. He tossed that one to the side as well, a mischievous smile on his face.
“Just one thing left,” he cooed, placing both hands on your inner thighs. “Judging by that little damp spot, we should probably get these off of you.” Your body burned from where he was looking. You tried to close your legs but he wouldn’t let you, situating himself closer and running his hands along your thighs again.
If there was one thing that made him happy, it was teasing you, and he was taking full advantage of that. Sensing some budding annoyance coming from you, he relented and stood up once again, instructing you to lay back with your head on your pillow. You did as he asked and looked up at him as he once again climbed on top of you, his hands and knees on either side of you. You couldn’t help but notice the growing bulge in his pants and thought it looked uncomfortable.
“Hey, Dazai,” you began, realizing something, “aren’t you going to take your clothes off, too? It’s not fair if it’s just me.” You thought you saw him tense, but just for a moment. He answered after briefly thinking it over and replied, “I’ll be keeping my clothes on. Slacks and a turtleneck is a much sexier look than a mummy, right?” It seemed like you asked something you shouldn’t have.
“I’m sorry,” you said quickly, feeling embarrassed. “I wasn’t thinking.” The most “skin” you ever saw from him was his bandaged forearms. It didn’t even occur to you that he didn’t want to put his bandaged body on display. You looked away from him, feeling like you ruined the mood, but he lightly touched your cheek and made you look up at him again.
“Don’t apologize, it’s okay,” he reassured you with a smile. “Maybe…maybe someday I will, but not tonight. Please understand.”
“I do,” you insisted, reaching up to him and pulling him down into a hug. “I don’t mind.” He seemed surprised by the sudden innocent gesture, his body tensing against you before relaxing. He felt comfortable and warm in your arms. He lifted himself from you after a few moments, kissing your cheek as if to say “thank you.”
“Now, where were we?” Dazai mused, peppering kisses along your neck and collarbone. “Oh, that’s right…” His hand roamed over your breast, down your stomach, and stopped at the hem of your panties. You instinctively kept your legs closed, your heart rate quickening.
“Is this okay?” he asked after a moment, locking his eyes with yours. “I need you to tell me before I go further.” You took a deep breath and relaxed your body before meeting his gaze once again.
“Yes, it’s okay,” you answered. “Please continue.” He nodded and moved himself lower on the bed, just to the side of your legs. With both hands, he took hold of the hem of your panties and began to pull them down. You lifted your hips for him to make it easier, laying back down once he reached your thighs. When he finally pulled them completely off, he tossed them to the side with the rest of your clothes and sat at the bottom of the bed, his eyes roving over you. You still kept your legs together, feeling embarrassed at having your most intimate part exposed to him. You covered your face with your arms to hide instinctively, though not for long. Dazai climbed his way back up the bed and moved your arms away, pinning them on either side of your head.
“You’re so beautiful, [Y/N],” he said softly with a smile. “Don’t hide from me, okay?” You could only nod and take a deep breath.
“Just to confirm, this is your first time, isn’t it?” he asked.
“Was it that obvious?” you asked back, your face burning once more. Dazai chuckled and leaned down to kiss you sweetly, his hands releasing your arms and sliding down to caress your body.
“Well, you’re certainly a blushing virgin,” he teased, “but I just want you to know I’ll be as gentle as you need me to be, and I’ll stop when you want me to.” Your whole body felt a loving warmth from his words, and you returned his smile.
“Thank you,” you acknowledged, feeling yourself calm down. “I trust you.” He nodded and gave you another quick kiss before trailing his lips to your jaw, then back to your neck. He settled his body beside you, one arm resting above your head and the other still caressing your body, steadily moving lower. You reached one arm up to hold the hand that was above your head and moved your other arm between his cheek and arm, your hand weaving into his hair. You relaxed your body, closing your eyes and focusing on the hand moving around your body. It slowly roamed over your stomach, your thighs, and eventually your private place. Your legs had relaxed and opened for him, allowing him access, and the second he traced a finger over your clit, your whole body jerked, a sharp gasp escaping your mouth.
Dazai grinned into your neck, running his fingers lightly over your clit and lips. He groaned at how much moisture was leaking out from you already, his hips once again pressing against you.
“F-Feels so good,” you moaned, tugging slightly at his hair. “Touch me more, ah–!” Dazai took your cue and pressed his fingers just a bit harder against you, sliding between your wet lips, against your leaking entrance, and back up to circle your clit. You couldn’t help but begin to move your hips in your bliss, rutting against his hand as you gasped and moaned.
“Let’s try inside,” he groaned against your neck, angling his finger against your entrance. He tried to push in, but you tensed immediately and told him to stop. Back to his senses, he pulled his hand back and raised himself to look at you.
“Sorry, are you okay?” he asked, concern knitting his brow.
“Y-Yeah, I’m fine,” you panted, “that just surprised me, and it kind of hurt.” Dazai leaned down and kissed you deeply, feeling guilty. He thought you were wet enough where it wouldn’t be a problem, but apparently not. Then, he had an idea; he remembered a certain something you had stashed away in your nightstand (that you didn’t know he knew about).
“I think we have something to help,” he said, straddling you again so he could reach the drawer. You watched as he opened the drawer and dug around until he found what he was looking for. As soon as he pulled out your vibrator, you wanted to die from embarrassment.
“H-How do you even know about that?!” you exclaimed, turning your head to the other side to pout. He laughed and kissed your cheek, adding, “I know everything there is to know!” You huffed in disbelief as he took his position laying next to you again, his expression mirthful.
“Just trust me,” he insisted, “this should make it easier for you.” You relented and allowed it, waiting for the familiar buzz to fill the room.
Dazai ran the toy along your body, rubbing it gently against your wetness before resting it against your clit. After a moment of teasing you, he clicked the small button at the top and the vibrator buzzed to life. You sighed at the familiar sensation, remembering all of the times you’ve used it by yourself. You never would have expected someone else to be using it on you, let alone Dazai.
He moved it in slow circles around your clit, pressing it harder against you the more your hips moved. You moaned and groaned as he turned up the intensity of the vibration, the wet sound of your pussy against the vibrator becoming louder the more you moved against it. Dazai couldn’t take his eyes away, the tightness in his slacks way past the point of being uncomfortable. He rocked his hips against you as you ground against the vibrator, the sight and the sounds driving him crazy. He groaned aloud again, not sure how much longer he could deal with this.
“D-Dazai,” you whined, garnering his attention and snapping him out of his daze. He turned to look at you and your expression almost did him in - lips parted, eyes half-lidded and glazed over in pleasure as you breathed almost raggedly.
“I wanna touch you, too,” you insisted, reaching toward his belt. “Please, let me touch you, too, Dazai!”
He couldn’t say no to that expression. Hell, “no” wasn’t even in his vocabulary anymore. He was done waiting.
“H-Hold this for a minute,” he instructed, gesturing toward the vibrator in his free hand. You took it from him, taking it away from your twitching heat for a moment while you watched him undo his belt with one hand. It was a slight struggle, but after he unbuckled it and tore it from his slacks, he easily used one hand to unbutton his fly and zip it down. He wasted no time shoving his boxers out of the way and freeing his aching cock from the confines of his slacks. He hissed from his own touch, the tip already leaking precum.
“Touch me,” he commanded, taking the vibrator back from you, “then I’ll make you feel good again.” You nodded and reached down, lightly grazing the head with your fingers. Dazai hissed again, leaning into your touch. Since this was your first time, you weren’t sure what to do to make him feel good. You decided to just wrap your hand around him and move.
That was enough to begin with, Dazai moaning into your neck as you stroked him. After a few minutes, he remembered what he was doing and placed your vibrator against your clit once again.
“O-Oh, fuck,” you whined, squeezing Dazai’s cock. He keened at the touch, trying to hold himself back from fucking into your hand. He meant what he said earlier, that he was in no rush. He wanted to make this last as long as possible, but with how good your hand felt, he wasn’t sure how much longer he could keep it up.
He eventually heard your breath hitch, your body beginning to tense beside him, and knew that it was time to take a break. Just as you felt a coil tightening in your stomach, your clit twitching against the vibrator, Dazai turned it off and tossed it to the side, robbing you of your release. This in turn made your hand stop, an annoyed groan leaving your throat.
“Why’d you stop?” you whined, taking your hand back as he took deep breaths beside you. He propped himself up on his elbow and grinned at you, “It feels better the longer it lasts, remember?” You sighed, tempted to just finish yourself off, but Dazai was already making his way down the bed again, hard cock bobbing as he moved.
“Let’s try this again,” he said as he settled between your legs. You were so wet that there was a damp spot where you were laying. Dazai stuck his finger into his mouth before running the tip along your wetness, between your lips, up to your clit and back. You wanted more of that touch and relaxed back on the bed. Dazai coated his finger with your wetness before prodding at your entrance again, waiting until you were ready before trying to enter you. You gave him the go ahead and he nodded, slowly pushing his finger inside.
It was uncomfortable and tight - just his fingertip stung, but you were able to take him in this time. You took deep breaths and tried to keep your muscles relaxed.
“I’m going to try and go deeper,” he informed you. “Tell me if it hurts.” He pushed a bit deeper. The stretch stung, but it wasn’t exactly painful, just uncomfortable.
“So far so good,” you answered his unasked question once he stopped and looked up at you. He pushed again and was met with resistance. You kept taking deep breaths and tried to relax as he slowly worked his finger inside of you. Eventually, the resistance relented, and his whole finger was sheathed inside of your wet heat.
“You did so good,” he praised you, his free hand caressing your stomach. “I’m going to take it out and put it back in, okay?” You nodded, the foreign feeling inside of you still uncomfortable but not unpleasant. He slowly worked you open, loosening your walls. He eventually added a second finger, which made things tight and painful again, but after some time and patience, he had stretched you out of the discomfort.
“Feel better?” he asked, still moving his fingers inside of you. You nodded, your breath hitched again; you felt like you were climbing back to your high. But, just as the last time, Dazai stopped just short of taking you there, removing his fingers from you and wiping them on the sheets. You whined again, throwing your head back against the pillow in annoyance. Dazai laughed, climbing over you again and kissing you deeply. He was nearly at his limit, his cock twitching almost painfully from the lack of the friction he wanted.
“Dazai,” you breathed as you broke the kiss. He hummed in acknowledgement, trailing his lips to your chin. Your body was buzzing as much as his and you needed to find some form of release.
“Dazai,” you said again, “I’m ready. I…I want you inside me.” Your cheeks burned with embarrassment from what you said, but Dazai didn’t even flinch. He raised his head to meet your gaze, chocolate eyes lidded in lust, and nodded. He repositioned the both of you, you still laying on your back with your head against your pillow and him on his knees between your legs.
“It’ll still hurt,” he warned you, his hot member rubbing against your entrance, “but it’ll feel really good once we’re past that. Okay?”
“Okay,” you nodded, your hands lightly gripping the bed sheets. “I’m ready.” Dazai slowly began to push into you, being careful not to be too rough. Your legs tensed at the pain from just his cockhead slipping inside you. You took deep breaths and tried to relax, listening to Dazai offering words of praise and encouragement as he stopped and started every so often. He was about halfway in when you asked him to wait, tears pricking your eyes. He did as you asked, caressing your thighs and talking to you until you were ready for him to move again. After a few more minutes of slowly entering, the resistance he was meeting gave way, and he was fully sheathed inside of you. You still stung, but it wasn’t as intense as before. Dazai didn’t move; he waited for you to get used to him while reveling in your tight warmth.
“You feel so fucking good, [Y/N],” he moaned, holding your hips in place. You caught your breath, adjusting to the feeling of him completely inside of you. It felt almost suffocating to be so full, every slight movement you made being slightly uncomfortable yet pleasurable at the same time. Dazai kept still, rubbing circles over your clit with his thumb as he waited patiently for you, his hard cock pulsing inside of you.
“Okay,” you said after a while, “I think I’m ready.” Dazai nodded and slowly pulled out of you, his cock dragging against your walls, before pushing back in at a slightly faster pace. You gasped as he filled you again, your head pushing back into your pillow. He kept that slow pace for a few more moments, gauging your expressions, before he began moving slightly faster. You keened at the new pace he set, already feeling pressure building in your lower stomach. Your eyes were glued to his face, his mouth open and eyes glazed over as he watched you, grunts and other noises escaping him every so often as he still steadily quickened his pace. His grip on your hips was getting tighter with every thrust, holding you down as you tried to move your hips up against his.
“Fuck,” he grunted, his hips stuttering. “You’re so tight, [Y/N]. It feels so g-good…” His thought trailed off as he re-angled himself, pulling your hips onto his lap. He leaned forward, fucking you at a new angle and hitting that spot inside of you that took your breath away and made stars dance in your vision. You cried aloud as his pace sped up, his hips slamming against yours almost desperately.
“D-Dazai,” you gasped, “Dazai, Dazai–!” He suddenly pulled all the way out of you, making you whine, and readjusted himself again to lay practically on top of you, his lips by your ear.
“Not that,” he said breathily, “call my name. I want you to say my name, [Y/N].”
“Osamu,” you panted, wrapping your arms and legs around him, his turtleneck sweater damp with sweat.
“Again,” he growled, his teeth claiming your earlobe, his breath heavy in your ear.
“Osamu,” you said again, almost pleading for him to continue, “Osamu…!” He entered you again, slamming against you and hitting that sweet spot.
“Good girl,” he groaned as he pressed against you. “Fuck, baby…” You clenched around him from his praise, making him slam into you again, his mouth trailing sloppy kisses from your ear to your cheek. The more he hit that spot, the more you cried out and hugged him tighter, a hot pressure coiling in your stomach again and rapidly tightening.
“I’m close,” you managed to whine through your pleasure, “I’m so fucking close, Osamu–!” He bucked his hips harder, his rhythm stuttering again, as he raised his head and met your blissed out expression once more.
“Cum, [Y/N],” he commanded, not slowing his pace. “Cum on my cock. Let me see your face when you cum, baby.” You clenched around him again, your breath hitching as his eyes burned into you. He kept hitting that spot, leaving you without any other options. You cried aloud, your body tensing and your pussy squeezing around him as you came, your eyes squeezing shut. Your whole body trembled as he fucked you through your orgasm, his eyes locked on your face as your head was thrown back in ecstasy. He was just as close as you, trying not to lose it as you clamped down on him and writhed underneath him. He slowed his pace again as you came down from your high, your breath ragged and your body trembling.
He was pushed over the edge as soon as he took in your fucked-out expression - mouth open, eyes clouded over, hair tousled and pussy still twitching around him. He picked up his pace again for just a moment before his own orgasm hit him, sending shockwaves through his body as he released inside of you, filling you up. His voice was caught in his throat, his arms and legs trembling as he came. He rode out his high, slowly thrusting into you through it until he had nothing left. He raised himself on shaky arms and pulled out of you before collapsing onto the bed next to you, an exhausted sigh leaving his lips.
The two of you laid there together in silence for a while, catching your breath and coming back to your senses. Dazai was the first one to move, readjusting his slacks before rolling over onto his side to face you. He didn’t say anything, just observed you for a while before you turned your head and met his gaze.
“Welcome back,” he teased, reaching out toward you and moving some hair from your face. “You okay?”
“I’m fine,” you hummed with a tired smile. “You?”
“Never better,” he replied with a grin. Your eyes trailed from his face to his slacks, taken aback by how dirty they had gotten.
“Your slacks will be ruined unless you wash them, you know,” you said, sitting up. “Maybe I have something you can change into–” As you tried to get up, Dazai grabbed your arm and pulled you back down onto the bed, holding you against him.
“I don’t care,” he mumbled into your hair. “Just lay here with me.” You tried to wiggle out of his arms, but to no avail. He was stronger than he looked, and if you were honest, you would much rather be cuddling against the warmth of his body, anyway. You sighed, wrapping an arm around him and tucking your head against his collarbone. It wasn’t long until the tendrils of sleep tugged at your consciousness, Dazai’s arms securely around you making you feel safe and secure.
The last thought you had as you drifted to sleep was how you were going to explain this to Yosano and Naomi the next day like you promised.