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If there's one thing everyone knows about Billy Hargrove, it's this: Billy Hargrove fucks.
He doesn't even need to brag about it. Everyone in Hawkins knows. It's clear to anyone with eyes the second he steps out of his camaro on his first day of school.
The girls are obvious. They stare and pop their gum and pretend Billy doesn't make them Feel Things, but Billy's been fucking girls his age since junior high. He knows what they like. They generally want him to take it slow, whisper sweet nothings in their ear, and if he's lucky they might throw in a couple blowies before Billy gets bored and moves on to the next one.
"You're not like anyone else I've been with baby, you're special," he says to no less than four girls before winter break.
Back in California he fucked around with a couple boys too. Mostly other surfers who liked to lounge around half naked in their basements, joints dangling from their lips as they dried off from the ocean. They'd laugh and tease as they stroked each other off, music echoing all around them.
He's not in California anymore though, now he's in some hick town that smells like cow shit, where textbooks on evolution are considered 'radically forward'. So he doesn't bother fucking any boys in town. After graduation maybe. Once he's got his diploma and can leave whenever he wants.
And girls, boys, they're both fine. But that's it. They're fine. And fine gets boring real quick. Especially out here in the boonies. The most exciting thing that happens is Carrie Miller letting Billy slide his fingers into her at the movie theatre. She comes when he's a couple knuckles deep, but chickens out when it's time to return the favour.
And that's what Billy hates about the girls his age, they're so… boring. Predictable. They can never make up their minds about whether they want Billy to fuck them or romance them, and he doesnt have time for that bullshit.
But older women? Oh man. Older women were Billy's favorite. They encouraged him to let loose, to really go wild and have his fun, with no strings attached. They knew what they wanted and they were upfront about it.
Karen Wheeler may have drawn the line at eye fucking Billy the first time she met him, but there are plenty of other women just like her in Hawkins that have no such reservations.
Billy can't blame them. His heart goes out to them honestly; to the majority of women who've been stuck for years sleeping next to potato shaped husbands. Usually the same pathetic men they went steady with back in high school. Men who they married young because they didn't know any better and it was what they thought they were supposed to do.
Those women are usually bored. They're eager to do more than sneak an unsatisfying quickie when the kids are out. Billy feels for them. He's there for them. He more than happily obliges them whatever they ask.
What they ask for is a good fuck. So Billy gives them exactly what they want and they adore him for it. Then, at the end of the night, after the handprints on their ass cheeks have stopped stinging, and while Billy gulps down water to make up for all the sweating he's done, his favorite part is when they fuss over him. When they check that he's ok, kiss his head and make sure he's got something to eat in his stomach.
Sometimes he's still in the kitchen when their oblivious husbands come home. There's always excuses aplenty, and none of the dumpy old men ever really question the weak explanations their wives give them. They just nod or grunt and drop their asses into the nearest armchair to watch TV. It's almost laughable. Their obliviousness only makes their wives more eager to pile all their attention on someone else. Someone who appreciates it. Someone like Billy.
Mommy Issues, a guy at a bar in Indy diagnoses him with. A MILF kink, he teases while they tug their pants back on. It's spring break, and Billy has let himself indulge a little. He knows this place doesn't card, not for boys like him.
They part amicably enough. Billy drives back to Hawkins long before his dad and Susan are due to come back from their little trip. He's more concerned about whether or not his dad will check the mileage on Billy's car when he gets back. He used to, back in Cali. Compared to that, some stranger's opinion on his kinks are meaningless.
Still.
He wasn't exactly wrong.
—
Billy gets the lifeguard job before he's done filling out the application. The pool manager takes one look at him, hears he used to surf in California, and gives him his whistle.
Honestly it's the best job he's ever had. Free pool admission, decent money, and all the pussy he could want, practically served to him on a platter. At least once per shift, some brave teenager will pretend to drown so Billy will dive in after her. His boss gives him a raise a week after hiring him. Apparently business has never been better and it's all thanks to Billy's abs.
It's a fucking ego trip. And it's awesome.
He feels like a fucking king atop a very tall throne, staring out behind his shades at his subjects. The moms of Hawkins ogle him from their reclined chairs, chests puffed out and makeup done up to the nines. He stares right back at them with a smirk, sunglasses concealing his gaze from any onlookers.
He almost gets to fuck Mrs. Wheeler. Almost. Agrees to meet at a motel and everything. Except when he's on his way to meet her, a stupid animal runs in front of him and totals his car. And just his luck the fucking chief of police is driving right behind him.
The chief acts weird, a little too paranoid for Billy's liking, but at least he gives Billy a ride back into town immediately. Neil gives him shit for coming home in a cop car, but Max distracts him by mentioning she's friends with Hopper's kid. The conversation lasts long enough for Billy to slip away into the bathroom and start the shower, granting him a few minutes to wait for Neil to calm down.
He leaves a couple free passes to the pool on her desk later as a thank you. They don't really talk, especially after the little shit nearly smashed his balls in with that bat, but this new truce of theirs has been… not terrible.
What is terrible is Billy's plans to move out being set back at least three months. The town mechanic is father to one of the many broken hearts Billy has crushed under his boot in the past year. He charges Billy double the regular cost to fix his Camaro.
He knows it's karma coming to give him the reach around again, but it still pisses him off to no end. There's no other garage in Hawkins, and he can't fix it himself without putting in an order for parts. So extra shifts at the pool it is.
A few days after having his car in the shop, Billy tries to prepare himself to see Mrs Wheeler again. He imagines her righteous fury at being stood up over the weekend, and tries to think of what he can say to keep her calm. He thinks he hears her son's voice and turns to look when he sees him.
The one, the only, Steve Harrington.
All thoughts of Karen Wheeler immediately vacate the premises. Steve Harrington is there. He's never there. Billy would have known. He'd have recognized that pretty boy anywhere.
Billy shifts in his seat, about to blow his whistle to grab Harrington's attention when he realizes that he isn't alone. Behind him, several kids around Max's age tug at his arm and shout around him.
Harrington doesn't even seem annoyed, just smiles and leads them all toward an empty spot on the grass. He then proceeds to roll out a blanket and a small container of orange slices before making the kids line up to get sun screened.
It's kind of adorable the way he fusses over them. Billy watches behind his sunglasses at how Harrington cheers the kids on when they jump in the water, and how he's quick to break up any arguments that start. He smiles warmly at them, even when the kids aren't demanding he constantly look at whatever they're doing.
It kind of reminds Billy of his mom, watching him from the beach.
Suddenly he remembers what James, or Jake, or whatever the fuck the guy from Indy's name was.
Mommy kink he'd said.
Damn. Maybe he was on to something.
—
Billy doesn't fuck boys in Hawkins.
That doesn't mean he doesn't want to. Especially pretty boys with nice hair and big brown eyes who aren't afraid to scoff at Billy's charms.
Tommy Hagan tried to warn him on his first day. He told Billy in hushed tones to steer clear, that King Steve Harrington wasn't worth his time. Apparently he'd let some prissy girl make him think he was better than everyone else. Then that girl fucked around with another guy on him, and instead of breaking up with her, King Steve blamed his best friends and stopped talking to them. Even after his girl's side piece beat his pretty face in.
Billy had to meet this supposed asshole. Had to formally introduce himself to the king of Hawkins high. Had to see for himself what the big fucking deal was.
He'd expected someone with maybe a similar body as him, and most likely a personality to match Tommy's. Instead he found a tall, slender yet muscular boy whose pretty face was speckled with moles and beauty marks.
Billy had a bit of weakness for unique little traits like that.
He didn't talk to him when he first saw him in the cafeteria. No, he saved that for Halloween. Saw Harrington from across the room as soon as he stepped inside. Locked his eyes on his target and didn't let up until he was standing in front of the pretty boy in a Tom Cruise costume.
Their conversation only lasted half a minute, but it was enough to keep Billy intrigued.
The floodgates opened when he joined the basketball team. He could grind up on Harrington at practice, taunt him and get under his skin with minimal effort.
And just because Billy was careful about touching boys in Hawkins, it didn't mean he couldn't look once in a while. Bless whoever had designed the boys showers so Billy could get an eyeful any time he wanted.
Despite taunts from Tommy, (who Billy definitely caught checking King Steve out more than once) Harrington never stooped down to their level. He'd just frown or glare and continue on with his business. He was the better person every time.
Billy could see why the guy drove Tommy so crazy.
Unfortunately the last time Billy actually spoke to Steve Harrington, it had been as Billy was punching the ever living shit out of his face.
He doesn't even really remember what had started it, something about Billy finding Harrington with Max and him lying about it. Mostly, Billy remembers his dad shoving him against the wall. Calling him a faggot right in front of Susan. He remembers that, along with every other moment of his life where he wishes he would've acted differently.
That and the fight anyway. He remembers that too. It was actually a pretty good one. Harrington had a mean right hook; he might've even stood a chance, right up until Billy unleashed the beast on him and let the pretty boy know what an actual fight looked like.
It felt good to hit him. Felt good to let out the rage that had been threatening to boil over the second his dad shoved him earlier. Billy punched Steve until his knuckles had split, then punched him some more just to make sure it stuck.
Then Max had dosed him with something and grabbed the bat and, well. That had been that.
Billy hadn't seen much of Harrington afterward. At the time, he could only lie there and watch from the floor as Max and her little friends dragged the not-so-pretty Harrington out of the house. He never did understand why they all flocked to his side so quickly, or why they all seemed to like and trust him so much.
The more Billy watches them all at the pool though, the more he gets it. Harrington is only eighteen, same as Billy, but he takes care of the kids better than half the women currently vying for Billy's attention. In return, the kids seem to idolize him.
Billy lets them have ten minutes. Then he blows his whistle and threatens to ban the weird toothless kid for running.
At last, Harrington finally turns his attention toward Billy. Annoyance takes hold of that pretty face, and Billy grins at him from his vantage point.
He wants to see how long Harrington can keep up this cool, collected act. So he keeps his eye on Harrington's little ducklings and calls them out on any little infraction he can. Sinclair is splashing too much. Wheeler is eating too close to the water. Henderson's jumping looks more like diving.
"Do you have to be so strict?" Harrington scowls at Billy after the second time he threatens to ban the kids for roughhousing. "They're just kids, man."
"Just doing my job, Harrington. Public safety is my number one priority," He leers down at him from over his shades.
Steve scoffs and crosses his arms. "Dude, come on. My- the kids aren't doing anything worse than everyone else here! Why don't you harass someone else for a change?"
"Why don't you do your job and I'll do mine, huh?" Billy answers. "Just focus on your little babysitting gig and leave the actual supervision work to me."
Steve looks like he wants to argue more, and Billy is more than happy to keep baiting him. But before either of them can open their mouth, someone screams.
"Blood! OhmyGod he's bleeding!"
Billy doesn't recognize the voice but his eyes close in on the far end of the pool. There's a dark shape under the water, and a thin trail of red rising to the surface.
He's already off his chair and hits the concrete running, but before he can dive into the pool, he sees Harrington is already cutting through the water toward whoever is down.
It catches Billy off guard for a second as he jumps in after them. He's fast, but Harrington reaches the injured kid first and pulls him up to the surface. Billy quickly closes the distance between them, grabbing the kid from Harrington and leading him toward the edge of the pool. Harrington is right behind him and helps lift the kid - Byers, he sees now - out of the water and onto his back.
“Clear the area!” Billy barks at the gawking onlookers as he drops to his knees to check if the kid is breathing. Or at least, he would if Harrington wasn’t already a step ahead of him, his ear to Byers’ mouth. His face pales.
“He’s not breathing.”
Shit. Alright. Keep calm, they can do this.
“I’m starting chest compressions,” Billy says, moving his hands over Byer’s chest where his lungs should be. He doesn’t have to say much else, Harrington is already in position near the kid’s head for mouth to mouth.
Billy pushes down on Byers chest just like all the training videos he had to watch instructed. After the thirtieth press, Harrington leans down and presses his mouth to Byers’, exhaling in time to the imaginary beat of the Bee Gees. As soon as he’s done, Billy pushes again.
One, Two, Three, Four…
Stayin’ Alive, Stayin’ Alive, his brain sings as he watches Harrington try to give his breath to Byers again.
One, Two, Three, Four…
They keep up the CPR for nearly half a minute when at last, the kid’s eyes blink open and he spits up a mouthful of pool water, immediately followed by a loud gasp.
Billy’s shoulders relax a fraction as the people around them begin to cheer and crowd them again. He stands and shouts at them to back up and give them some space. Beside him, Harrington throws his arms around Byers’ small shoulders and squeezes him tightly.
“Jesus dude, you nearly gave me a heart attack!” He says as he clings to the kid. “Never do that again, god I was so worried!”
Byers squeeks out an apology and has the decency to look embarrassed. Billy is about to give him shit for fucking around when he sees the trickle of blood running down the side of Byers' face.
Shit.
Billy blows his whistle as loud as he can. Orders everyone out of the water and signals with his hand to the other lifeguards on duty to close it all down.
It’s just a minor blood contamination, a million to one, but Billy knows the worst case scenario and doesn’t want to risk it. Last thing he needs is for the place to get hit with a lawsuit and lose his job.
There are boos and grumbles as the other lifeguards start ushering people outside, leaving Billy to deal with getting Byers checked out.
Harrington keeps a hand on the kid's shoulder as Billy leads them toward the first aid station. The rest of Harrington's brood follow along after them, watching with wide, concerned eyes.
It's a minor cut on the side of his head. Billy is more concerned about a concussion. According to Byers, someone bumped into him and as he fell, he accidentally hit his head on the edge of the pool.
Harrington gives Billy a long stare. He can almost hear the "I told you so" on his tongue. Which, whatever, Harrington was the one who had walked up and distracted him in the first place, he's got no right to shift all the blame on Billy.
He’s about to tell him exactly that when Steve looks away and smiles at Byers. “Hey, you know what the best treatment for injury is? Ice cream.”
Billy is very tempted to question Steve’s medical advice, but the way Byers and the other kids perk up at the suggestion keeps him quiet. It’s kind of cute. Not the kids, Billy doesn’t care about the little shits, but the way they look and listen to Harrington like he’s the greatest person in the world is a little endearing.
“From Scoops?” Byers asks as Billy finishes up cleaning and patching up his head wound.
Harrington smiles again and nods. “Sure thing buddy. As many toppings as you want too.”
“What? I thought we were only limited to one!” Henderson interrupts.
Steve breathes out a small laugh. “Yeah, well, exceptions are made for kids who nearly die on my watch, ok?”
“That’s so unfair, we’re always on the verge of death around you!” Sinclair adds.
Billy snorts and all eyes look back to him warily, as though they’d all forgotten he was there. Whatever, it’s not like he also saved Byers’ life or anything.
“Quit arguing with your mommy and get the hell out of my pool,” Billy says, pointing to the exit. Grumbling, the little gremlins start to leave out the door one by one.
“It’s not even his pool, y’know,” Wheeler mutters as they head toward the locker room.
Billy rolls his eyes and starts cleaning up the office. Harrington hangs back a moment after the kids are gone. He stares at Billy, looking like he’s debating whether or not to speak.
“What?” Billy grunts.
Steve frowns and runs a hand through dark, damp hair, pushing a few strands out of his face. His glances around, avoiding Billy's gaze. “Nothing. Just. Thanks for… y’know.”
Billy raises an eyebrow. Harrington sighs and turns away. “I’ll… try to keep a closer watch on them all next time.”
Then he’s out the door and gone.
Next time, he’d said. Next time.
—
If Billy hadn't been hurting for bed partners before, after the pool incident he's practically the most desired man in town. The mothers of Hawkins are especially excited to hear he'd valiantly saved the Byers kid from another untimely accident and Billy is not above reaping the rewards.
A couple weeks after the whole thing he's dead to the world in his bedroom. He's still sleeping off the marathon he'd had with Mrs. Grayson the night before when Max pokes him awake.
"Billy. Me and El wanna go to the mall. Can you drive us?"
"You and who?" He repeats after her, grumpy, annoyed, and still half asleep.
"El. Duh. Are you gonna drive us or not?"
"Not. Catch the bus, I'm not your goddamn chauffeur."
Max glares at him and crosses her arms. “The buses run late today, we’ll be waiting forever. It’s not like you’re doing anything right now anyway.”
"Wrong. I'm sleeping. Now get out."
Max rolls her eyes and looks over her shoulder to the doorway. "Ugh. Would your dad drive us, El?"
Theres a mousey girl with dark hair behind her. She shakes her head. "What about Steve? Steve has a car."
Billy perks up. Was this kid another member of Harrington's little flock?
Max sighs dramatically. "Steve's working at the mall today, he can't drive us. He'll give us free ice cream if we can just get there though."
Billy slowly rises from his bed and narrows his eyes at Max. "If I give you a ride," he mutters, "you're covering for me next time I’m out late. Got it?”
The corners of Max’s mouth relax. Her scowl is much less intimidating as she holds out her hand. “Deal.”
Just because Billy says he’ll drive them doesn’t mean he’s a saint though. He intentionally takes longer than usual to choose an outfit and style his hair just to annoy Max. Her little friend doesn’t seem to mind though. She just laughs as Max falls face first onto the sofa and shouts into the cushions.
Unlike Max, El or Ellie or whatever her name is actually says “Thank you” as Billy pulls into Starcourt’s parking lot.
Her and Max slide out of the car and run ahead, oblivious to him. It's only when the girls pause in front of the entrance that Max realizes Billy has left the Camaro and is walking toward them. She gapes at him as she realizes he’s also headed inside.
“Why are you still here? Don’t you have some girl somewhere to be gross with?”
Billy shoves her lightly as he passes her, just enough to make her stumble a bit.
“That how you talk to the guy who drove you all this way?” he sneers. “Maybe I need to get something here too, ever think about that, shitbird?”
“What do you need?” El asks, sounding genuinely curious. Billy clears his throat. Tries to think of something clever, something other than I really wanna annoy your babysitter for fun.
“None of your business," he mumbles.
—
Twenty minutes later, long after Max and El have run off to God knows where, Billy stands at the sink in the men's room. Cold water drips down his face from where he'd splashed it.
Steve Harrington was going to kill him. That fucking uniform. Billy had no warning, nothing to prepare himself with. It wasn't fair.
The hat. The tie. The shorts. The goddamn shorts.
He catches his breath and looks at himself in the mirror. Tries to collect himself, stay focused. Harrington hadn't noticed him when Billy finally found him, he'd been too busy helping a customer. Billy still has the upper hand, even after his sudden retreat.
Once he's finally calm and confident again, he heads back to the food court. Sees the bright Scoops Ahoy sign and makes a beeline for it, careful to keep his stride casual as he walks through the doors.
As he expected, Steve pales when he sees Billy strolling up to the counter. Billy has to give him credit though, rather than running into the back or pretending to play it overly cool, Harrington simply leans into the whole schtick with his pretty head held high.
"Ahoy there," Harrington says, voice dripping in fake cheer. He meets Billy's gaze straight on. "What can I get for you?"
Billy can't help but smile wide as his tongue skims the edges of his teeth. He takes his time and lets himself really absorb the image before him. "Well don't you look absolutely darling."
He sees a blush start to form on Harrington's cheeks, and God he looks like a fucking renaissance twink with that soft, tousled hair framing his face. But Harrington rolls with Billy's punches. He smiles as sweetly as he can without meaning it.
"Why, thanks Captain. Can I interest you in some ice cream while you're here enjoying the sights?"
Billy laughs. Harrington is bolder than he thought.
"What would you suggest, sailor?"
Harrington hums and looks over the tubs of ice cream to his right. "Depends what you like. Are you more chocolate or vanilla?"
"Oh, nothing vanilla," Billy says, using the same tone he pulls his older women with. "Vanilla is boring. I like my flavors a little on the wild side, you know?"
Harrington bats his eyelashes in mock sweetness. "I see. In that case, how about mint chocolate chip? Or maybe cherry delight?"
It's like he wants Billy to pick on him, it's not fair. "You offering me your cherry, sailor?" He asks, watching Harrington's face like a hawk.
Steve's eye twitches - just a little, and he blinks twice. He glances over at the window behind him where a girl, also dressed in nautical attire, watches them with silent amusement. Then he turns back to Billy. Leans over the counter so their faces are much closer.
"I don't think you'd know what to do with my cherry, Hargrove,'' Harrington says in a quiet voice meant only for Billy's ears. "Maybe you'd be better off with bubblegum, all the little boys seem to love that one."
Billy's brain shuts down for a second.
This isn't right. Harrington is supposed to get all red and embarrassed. He's supposed to roll his eyes and tell Billy to get lost. Billy is supposed to have control of this situation, how is Harrington taking over?
Billy scoffs. "Oh sailor, you wound me. You know what? I'd love to sample your cherry delight."
Harrington doesn't flinch. He grabs a little plastic sample spoon from behind the register. Scoops it into a radioactively bright pink tub of ice cream. Hands the spoon over to Billy.
He definitely does not expect Billy to lean his head down and lick the ice cream off the spoon while Harrington is still holding it.
He nearly drops it, Billy can see his fingers tremble. Billy grins as he slowly lets his tongue curl back to his mouth. Licks his lips after swallowing.
"Hm. Not bad."
Harrington is bright red now, but his eyes are focused on Billy and his expression is carefully controlled. Then he gets a little gleam in his eye that makes Billy's knees weak.
Still holding the spoon, Harrington raises it to his lips. Pokes his tongue out and slowly licks up the remaining ice cream that Billy missed, still slick from where it touched his lips. He pops the spoon into his pretty mouth. Slowly pulls it out again. The soft, puckering smack of his lips against the small spoon will linger in Billy's memory forever.
Steve meets Billy's eyes with a cruel and dangerous edge to his stare. "Anything else you'd like to sample while you're here Captain?"
Billy stares. Tries to think of something to say.
Goddamn it.
He turns around and storms out.
Once he's outside the store, Billy sneaks a glance back in Harrington's direction. He sees him turned around to face the girl behind the window. Harrington must say something, because the girl rolls her eyes and draws a line on a little whiteboard. She holds it up and while Billy can't make it out perfectly, he thinks shes added a lone tick in a "you rule" column.
—
Neil had been acting weird for days leading up to the big mall fire. Almost like he had been running on a very angry autopilot. Billy could usually get a good read on his father's moods, but the last week had felt like living with a violent, moody stranger.
It feels surreal to hear his father is one of the fire's many casualties. He doesn't know all the details but some men in fancy suits tell him something about Neil being impaled on several pieces of debris. They don't recommend anyone seeing the body.
Spare yourselves the trauma, they suggested to him and the girls.
To his own shock and surprise, the news makes him… sad. Overwhelmingly sad. It rises into Billy's throat and threatens to choke him. Then it burns behind his eyes until he can't see clearly. An intense anger like nothing he's ever felt before take hold of him.
How fucking dare his own body betray him? He's furious, so much that he can barely stand it. His father was a rotten bastard, right down to his core, and they hated each other for as long as either could remember. The piece of shit doesn't deserve his tears.
No. What makes Billy so goddamn mad is that he was supposed to be the one to leave. He was supposed to be the one to tell Neil he had no power over him anymore. He was supposed to be free of him on his own terms.
Instead Billy is stuck helping Susan box up all their crap and get the house ready to sell. Neil has jack shit for life insurance, and it turns out that the majority of his assets aren't worth anything either since the fucking bastard never paid anything off. To top it off, during their time together Neil hadn't let Susan have a job. Now suddenly, she and Max were on the brink of losing everything. Billy is the only one left to try and help his stepmother figure her shit out.
He hopes she knows how fucking lucky she is to have him, but he's doubtful.
She drinks more and more in between sobs and depressing conversations. Slurs her words together when she reminisces about things Neil loved, and how awful and unfair it is that he's gone now. She talks about him like he was a saint, some paragon of virtue that the world is now lesser for without.
She talks about him as if she hadn't stood there a hundred times, watching while her saintly husband beat his only son bloody.
Max was always a real bitch, especially after coming to Hawkins, but at least she made attempts to keep Billy's father from hitting him. She would try changing the subject whenever Neil would start insulting Billy over dinner. If it was a rough night, sometimes she gave him an ice pack after to help with the swelling.
He stays more for her than for Susan. As much as he hates them both sometimes, Max is just a kid. A kid that's a little too fucking similar to Billy when he was her age.
And it's not like has anywhere else to go. After chipping in for the funeral, the headstone, everything, Billy's savings are almost entirely drained.
He moves them into the trailer park on the other side of town. On their first day of settling in, Billy finds out from a couple neighbors that they're conveniently located across the road from a drug dealer.
At least the rent's cheap. And hey, it's a lot fucking easier to find decent weed now. The metalhead selling it gives him a good discount for recognizing the band on his shirt too.
A couple weeks after they move in, Billy smokes a joint on the porch. It's the first time he's smoked pot so close to home. He tries to make himself relax his shoulders. There's no more Neil to come bust his face open if he catches him. Susan is passed out in her bedroom. He's fine.
Max comes outside a few minutes after Billy lights up. She doesn't say anything as she sits down on the chair beside him. She just accepts the joint when Billy wordlessly offers it to her.
They'll never be the Brady bunch but at least she doesn't make him as angry as she used to.
She coughs after her first inhale. Billy doesn't look at her. Just takes a sip of his beer and stares off into the distance at the thin sliver of a sunset. Eventually Max stops coughing long enough to take another puff and pass it back to him.
"Can we start over?" She asks eventually, voice a little raspy.
"What do you mean?"
Max shrugs. Picks at a scab on the back of her hand.
"I dont know. Like. Just. Forget all the shit between us that's happened until now. Pretend we're just two new people who found out they happen to be brother and sister. Start fresh." She lets out a shaky breath. "Try to, I don't know. Try to be a family."
Billy scoffs and drains the rest of his Coors.
"Some fuckin' family we got here."
Max shrugs. "Better than it was a month ago."
She's not wrong about that. Despite the unpredictable waves of grief and anger that keep threatening to overwhelm him, Billy is… well, he's not okay, but at least he's not okay with his face intact.
They sit in silence for a while, staring at the people going in and out of the neighbor's trailer. Eventually Billy finishes off the joint and rises from his lawn chair. "Start over huh?" He mumbles.
"I'll think about it."
Max doesn't smile, but her eyes are wide and vulnerable as she watches Billy stand. He assumes she's waiting for him to follow up with a cruel joke. Part of him is tempted to make it one. Instead he turns toward the trailer door and gives her a lazy wave goodnight.
They don't talk about it again. But Billy can tell she meant what she said. So he tries.
He makes more of an effort to be less annoying to her. Complains a little less when she asks him to drive her somewhere. She starts asking him more often, even when he knows she could get a ride from someone else. It takes him an embarrassingly long time to realize it might be because she actually wants to spend time with him.
The thought is… Not totally repulsive.
As an extra bonus, his path also starts crossing into Harrington's more and more.
Mrs. Wheeler doesn't meet Billy's eyes when he arrives to pick Max up from Nerd Headquarters. It's uncomfortable for everyone except Mr. Wheeler, who is sound asleep in his armchair.
"I wondered why Mike's mom suddenly decided her and the hubby needed to go to a couples retreat last month," Harrington notes as he and Billy sit outside and share a cigarette on the front steps. The kids have requested an additional ten minutes to finish whatever the fuck they're playing. Harrington didn't mind, and Billy wasn't in the mood to make himself the asshole for once.
"Is that why you were looking after the brats so much over the summer?"
Harrington nods. Takes another drag. "Not just the summer. I'm booked solid for like two months. Apparently I'm good at this babysitting thing, which y'know, my dad would absolutely love to hear."
"Fuck him," Billy says without thinking. Harrington looks surprised, so Billy shrugs.
"Do you know how hard it is to get someone who actually knows what they're doing to voluntarily watch a kid? On a weekend? You're practically a unicorn, Harrington. Especially after that whole swimming incident with the Byers kid."
Steve rubs a hand over the back of his neck and looks away. From the bright glow of the porchlight, Billy can see the tips of his ears are red.
"You know," Billy grins "you'd be amazed how many of my mature lady friends have asked about you. You caught a lot of eyes that day at the pool. Trying to steal my spotlight, Harrington?"
Steve snorts and rolls his eyes. "No way. I doubt I'd satisfy your 'friends' particular interests anyway."
Laughing, Billy stands up. He's intrigued. "No? Well, good news for me then." He smirks as he catches Harrington staring at the unbuttoned part of his chest. "Just for curiosity's sake, who are you interested in satisfying these days, pretty boy?"
Harrington doesn't reply. He just stares at Billy for what feels like a very long time. His tongue peeks out for just a moment to wet his lips.
"You really wanna know?"
Billy really does.
He also really wants to wring that Henderson kid's neck as he flies out the front door and interrupts their conversation. Before Billy can yell at the little fucker, Harrington has already been swept away by the tide of preteens he's promised to drive home.
From across the street, Billy sees them all clamber into the familiar BMW. Before they drive off, Harrington looks his way. He smiles and gives Billy a small wave goodbye. Then he turns the steering wheel and drives off down the street until Billy can't see the car anymore.
"What are you smiling at?" Max asks, still waiting for him to unlock the passenger door.
Billy snaps his head away and shoves the keys in the lock. Slams the door behind him a little harder than he means to.
"Not your ugly mug, that's for sure."
She hits him in the bicep. Not hard, there's barely any muscle behind it. Then she freezes. Swallows. Waits for Billy to blow up at her the way he used to.
A part of him still has the urge to. He hasn't moved, but his hand tightens its hold on the steering wheel. He wants to hit her back. Wants to scream at her, tell her to mind her fucking business, what the hell does she know about fucking anything anyway?
But he wants to be better than his fucking father more. So he keeps his eyes on the road and starts the car up. The headlights pierce through the darkness that's settled over town.
"You hit like a girl."
From the corner of his eye, Billy sees her relax her shoulders. She folds her arms and he can feel the glare burning through the side of his head. "That's 'cause I am one, dumbass."
The rest of the drive home, they trade insults back and forth with each other. Billy manages to calm himself down and keep his anger checked by coming up with insults that make Max laugh. She's still trying to stop giggling over 'buttmuncher' as Billy lets himself think on the question he'd asked Harrington earlier.
He's maybe eighty percent sure he knows the answer. And while he's not much for gambling, he likes those odds.
—
After the pool closes for the season, Billy takes a job as a fitness trainer at the new gym downtown. Much like the pool, he doesn't have to try very hard to get the position. Word gets around again about where Billy Hargrove works, and the women that suddenly pack the gym give Billy the major ego boost he's come to crave.
The main draw of the job however, is the close location to Family Video. It's literally across the street from the new gym; the view is perfect.
The windows at the front of the workout studio are huge. On a usual day Billy has to chase several groups of horny boys (and sometimes girls) away from where they're pressed up against the glass, watching women in bright spandex bend and stretch.
The giant windows also allow Billy a clear view into Family Video if he stands in the right spot. More importantly, he knows the reverse is also true. So he makes a habit of lifting weights there when he's got some free time.
As he expected, Billy catches Harrington watching him. He catches him watching a lot. And he knows he's not mistaking that look. He's seen it back in California and in the bars from the city. And after the other night at the Wheelers', Billy is tired of being careful.
—
He walks into the video store a few days before Halloween. He's still a little sweaty from his last workout, but he has a hunch it will work in his favor. Judging by Harrington's reaction when Billy approaches him at the counter, his hunch is correct.
"Not babysitting tonight, Harrington?" Billy asks as he leans his hip against the counter and rests his arm over the top, dangerously close to Steve's hand.
"Uh."
The same girl he saw working with Harrington back at the ice cream place seems to pop out of thin air beside him. For a brief moment Billy's throat feels tight. He forgot about her. Hadn't thought to check if Harrington finally found another girlfriend.
Her name tag reads Robin. She smiles brightly at Billy as she elbows Steve's side unsubtly. "You know he's actually child-free all weekend? And also has no plans with anyone? Crazy right?"
Well. That should teach Billy to never second guess himself.
"Is that so? Very crazy." Billy grins. "Wouldn't you know it, I've got a free weekend too. What a coincidence"
Robin makes a loud "Huh!" noise and backs away from the counter. She makes some excuse about putting tapes back and leaves them alone. Steve glares at her, no doubt for abandoning him. How adorable.
"So tell me Harrington," Billy says, leaning in a little closer over the counter than he should. "If there was a certain somebody I'd like to bring home to have a little fun with. What movie do you recommend I put on? What do you think is best for making out to?"
Steve swallows. Takes a second to stabilize himself a little after Billy's unexpected first move. "Depends," he finally answers. "What kind of person is this conquest of yours?"
Billy licks his lips. Stares right into his eyes as he leans closer across the counter. "Pretty brunette. Big Bambi eyes. Real good with kids." He lets his eyes wander over Harrington's body, just in case he isn't being clear enough. "I'm pretty smitten here, just wanna impress, you know?"
The cheap overhead lighting does nothing to hide how red Steve's face is.
"Oh. OH. W-well," he stammers. "If uh. If this person was maybe interested. When- uh, when would you be seeing them?"
Billy's grin could put a shark to shame. "I was thinking about picking them up here tomorrow at seven. We grab a bite to eat and maybe go back to my place to watch the movie after."
"That sounds… yeah. That sounds good. Like a good time." Steve clears his throat, obviously flustered. "I don't think it will really matter what movie you put on, honestly. Sounds like this person is already interested."
Billy laughs. "Well, that's a relief." He grabs the first case he can see from behind the counter and sets it in front of Steve. "This one then."
—
Billy is a little nervous when he pulls up to Family Video's parking lot the following day. Just a little. Maybe he wasn't clear enough, or maybe-
The nerves go away when Harrington suddenly opens the passenger door and slides inside. He turns and grins at Billy, then suddenly freezes.
"You… weren't expecting someone else, were you?" He asks, confidence slipping.
It's almost a relief, seeing him just as nervous as Billy.
"Nah, you'll do just fine," Billy teases. He turns up the music on the radio and floors it.
He's not ashamed of living in the trailer park. There are some decent people living around him, and he won't apologize for having his name on the goddamn lease. It's his, and while it's not his first choice, it's the first home he's had that he doesn't feel afraid to be in. He's proud of his castle, even if it is made of sand.
What he is ashamed of is finding Susan passed out on the couch in plain view as soon as he opens the front door. There's a bottle loosely clutched in her hand. Her robe is half open, and one of her tits is almost falling out of her flimsy nightgown. Half a cigarette is still dangling from her lips.
"Oh," he hears Steve breathe as he stops right behind Billy.
God fucking damn it.
Billy wants to hit something. He wants to hit Susan for doing this to him - she was supposed to be working tonight, she promised him she would be out - but he keeps his fists at his side.
"Why don't you wait for me in the car for a minute, Harrington?" Billy asks, glad when Steve quickly picks up that it isn't really a request. He hands him the keys and practically pushes him out the door.
"Five minutes, tops," he promises. Harrington nods. If he has questions, he keeps them to himself.
The first thing Billy does once the door is closed is cross the room and grab the cigarette out of Susan's mouth. There's a small pile of ash on the carpet, and Billy wants to shove her face in it. This was his trailer, his home, and she could have sent the whole thing up in smoke.
He grinds the cigarette into the closest ash tray and turns off the television. Max is spending the night over at El's house tonight, which gives Billy a small sense of relief. She won't have to come home and see her mother like this at least.
Billy takes the bottle out of Susan's hand and sets it on the coffee table. Then he grabs a blanket from the hallway closet and tosses it over her sleeping body, taking care to make sure she's completely covered. Once he's done checking on her he goes to the fridge and pulls out a six pack from the bottom shelf.
He starts to head outside then stops. Looks back at the coffee table where Susan's left her pack of cigarettes.
He grabs them and shoves them into his jacket. Considers it tax for ruining his night.
Harrington is waiting patiently in the camaro and doesn't mention what he saw in Billy's trailer. It almost makes it worse.
"She's been taking my dad's death hard," Billy mutters as an explanation. "Sorry."
"Nothing to be sorry about," Harrington answers softly.
Billy shrugs. "Well, this kind of ruins our movie night."
"We can watch it at my place," Harrington says. "My parents aren't home. They're like. Never home." There's something hollow about the way he says it. He must notice Billy's stare, because he quickly clears his throat and shrugs. "So I've got, you know, lots of space for us to watch a movie."
"That so?" Billy puts on an easy smile. "Well, why didn't you say so earlier?"
Steve shrugs. "Thought it would be nice to see your place. Mine's kind of. I dunno. Tacky."
"I can live with tacky," Billy says, already speeding out of the lot.
—
"Splash? Really?" Harrington laughs as he puts the VHS tape into the slot.
"Hey, you said the movie wouldn't matter," Billy teases as he settles into the big couch, arm draped over the back casually.
"I guess I did," Harrington admits as he sits down beside him, his pretty hair brushing against Billy's arm.
It starts with their thighs touching within the first ten minutes. Neither pulls away. After twenty minutes, Harrington leans against Billy's side. He doesn't even move when Billy drops his arm over his shoulders, just rests his head against Billy's. It's so casual and yet Billy can't remember the last time his heart beat so fast for a good reason.
They manage to make it through another half hour of the movie. But then it only takes a little turn of his neck, and Billy can't tell if it's him or Harrington that closes the small gap between them, but it doesn't matter because he's suddenly kissing him and he never wants to stop.
It feels fucking amazing.
—
They manage to stop touching each other long enough to move to Steve's bedroom. Billy keeps it nice and easy for him, only goes as far as a little fingering. He'd have been more than fine finishing them both off with his hand, but that was before Steve bit his lip and asked if Billy could fuck him between his thighs.
After taking a couple seconds to keep from self-destructing, Billy does exactly that. He isn't wearing a rubber, but Harrington doesn't complain, just moans louder when Billy eventually jerks his hips back and shoots his load right over Harrington's pretty little virgin hole.
He thinks he sees a little bit drip inside. Then Steve's voice cracks mid moan and he comes all over his mattress.
Neither of them move for a minute. When Billy can form thoughts again, he shifts and starts to swing his legs over the side of the bed. Just as he's about to leave, Steve wraps an arm around Billy's waist.
"Don't go," he says quietly.
Arguing would just take too much energy. So Billy lays back down and stays where he is, nice and warm and wrapped around pretty boy Steve Harrington. He doesn't think he could feel any more relaxed if he tried.
Just as he thinks he might pass out, Harrington turns over so his back is pressed against Billy's chest. His hand rests over Billy's and gently guides it up to his breast, over his heart. He holds it there until Billy's palm cups around him. Hums sweetly as Billy sleepily circles his thumb around the little bud of his nipple.
Fuck what he thought before. This was the most relaxed Billy has ever felt in his life.
—
For having never fucked a man before, turns out Steve Harrington is pretty damn good in the sack.
He's also fucking insatiable. After their first time together, Harrington has suddenly decided he wants to sit on Billy's dick as often and as conveniently as possible. Billy has no major arguments about the arrangement. He lets Steve push him into maintenance closets, bathroom stalls, and the backseat of the Camaro with great enthusiasm, in fact.
He's having so much fun letting Steve push him around that it's only after a few weeks have passed that Billy notices that he hasn't dated or fucked anyone else since the first time with Harrington.
He doesn't mind as much as he probably should. None of his past or potential partners get Billy's heartbeat racing anywhere near as much as Steve does. And it's not just the raunchy things he lets him do, like how Billy made him lick his own cum off Billy's boot, or how sometimes Billy will eat him out until he cries. It's the other things; the softer things.
It's the way Steve holds Billy's head close to his heart when Billy marks his chest up with his teeth. It's the way he rubs his back in gentle circles after they've both finished fucking each other like wild dogs. The way he whispers "shh" and "everything is going to be okay, Billy" into his hair when it's three in the morning and Billy is gasping for air between painful sobs.
He wipes his tears once the ghost of Neil has stopped lingering at the foot of the bed. He wipes them away and kisses Billy's cheeks and forehead to make them stay gone.
After that particular night, Billy wakes up the next morning alone in Harrington's bed. There's no note, and no sign of him, so naturally Billy wonders if this is Steve's way of kicking him out. The thought cuts him sharper than he expects. Gathering his clothes up, he glares at the ugly plaid wallpaper as he gets dressed, ready to do a walk of shame.
As he stomps down the stairs, he hears something in the kitchen. His curiosity is stronger than his irritation, so Billy follows the sound. There, standing by the stove, he catches the one and only Steve Harrington making breakfast while dressed in only his boxers and a blue silk robe.
"Oh," Steve turns his head over his shoulder and smiles. "Good morning," he says as his eyes wander over Billy's body. Then he catches himself and turns back to the stove. "Uh. Sorry, I forgot. How do you like your eggs again?"
Fuck.
Billy is in deep.
—
Billy knows Steve is some kind of ace babysitter, it's become town knowledge. But he hadn't truly realized just how in demand Steve really is until Billy starts driving him to and from all his babysitting gigs.
It's also extremely awkward to see so many familiar women answer the door when he comes to pick Steve up. It's gotten to the point that Steve has told him to just wait outside in the car and he'll come out to meet him at the curb.
Jealousy is cute on him. Still, Billy does as he's told.
He's waiting outside the Wheeler house yet again one chilly night in late November. He's already burned through two cigarettes and he's annoyed.
Steve is late. Nearly twenty minutes.
Rather than sit outside and waste any more fuel, Billy thinks fuck it, and gets out of the car. He stomps up the driveway and raps his knuckles loudly on the door.
Steve answers immediately, already apologizing. "I'm so sorry! they're running late and you'd already left when I called your house to tell you!"
"Yeah whatever you can make it up to me la-" he cuts himself off and stares at Steve's face.
"Are you wearing makeup, Harrington?"
Steve's eyes widen as he touches his face. He swears and dashes to the nearest hallway mirror. "Oh f-" he bites his lip as Holly Wheeler dashes into sight, laughing as two other little girls follow behind her. They all look at Harrington gleefully. Billy assumes they're the culprits behind his new look.
Steve heads to the kitchen sink and splashes water on his face while Billy leans against the wall and watches. Steve tries to rub the makeup off with a clean dish rag to middling success. He gets the majority of it, but his lips are still stained a darker red, and there's a few stray sparkly bits from the eyeshadow he'd let the girls paint him with.
Obviously it was just a game. Billy has heard enough horror stories about bored little girls from Steve to know that he would do just about anything to keep them happy and occupied. If it meant letting them paint his face with a little makeup, it was no big deal in his opinion.
And Billy's being honest with himself? It's a little hot. The idea of Steve with makeup on.
Maybe more than a little.
The image of Steve with smeared lipstick, pops into his head, evidence of Billy kissing him stupid. He imagines those pretty eyes looking up at him from his knees, streaks of mascara running down Steve's cheeks as he deepthroats Billy's cock and-
"Steve, we wanna play house," Holly says, tugging on Steve's shirt and cutting Billy's fantasy down.
Harrington smiles at her and nods. "Okay, we can do that. Just let me talk to Billy for a minute ok?" He turns to face him, apologetic.
"They said they might be another hour. If you don't wanna wait I'm sure I can get a ride from Mr. Wheeler when I'm done."
Billy scoffs. "Are you kidding?" He glances down at the girls and grins. "I for one love playing house."
Holly and her friends cheer excitedly at the news. "Yes! Okay Steve," she points at him, trying to sound sneaky but failing halfway through as she bursts into giggles. "You be the mommy. And you-" she spins around and points to Billy. "You can be the daddy!"
Billy grins like a shark at Steve. "Hear that Harrington? I'm the Daddy."
Steve flushes, traces of his makeup standing out against his red face. He crosses his arms and narrows his eyes at Billy.
"That's 'Mommy' to you. Daddy."
Oh, that's not fair.
So they play house with the girls. It's not nearly as sexy as Billy had teased-slash-imagined. Mostly it involves a lot of imaginary cooking over Holly's plastic kitchen set. Then a lot of imaginary eating. At one point one of the other girls starts piling baby dolls into Steve's arms like no tomorrow.
"Look what you've done to me Hargrove," He says to Billy, trying not to drop any of his new and creepy plastic children.
Billy barks out a laugh."Yeah well. That's what happens when Mommy wears that outfit Daddy likes."
Steve rolls his eyes and continues to play along with the girls' weird little games. One of them suddenly decides she's actually a witch and they're making potions over the stove now. They make Steve sit on one of their tiny plastic chairs and 'drink' from a teacup that will apparently turn him into a frog.
He ribbits and jumps around, and they all burst into squeals of laughter as he chases after them. It's fucking cute, even to a cynic like Billy. The girls are having so much fun making Steve play with them that they seem to forget Billy is even there after a while. He doesn't mind. He's content to watch the show.
They (mostly Steve) entertain the kids for nearly forty five minutes before the sound of the Wheelers' car outside grabs their attention.
The couple apologize profusely and pay Harrington a little extra for his trouble. Mrs Wheeler awkwardly tries to give a little to Billy as well but he turns it down.
He'll get his payment from Steve later when they're alone.
She avoids eye contact with him after that as the kids all say their goodbyes to Steve. Holly even spares a quick "Bye" for Billy when she notices him again, and then they're out the door.
"Your parents home?" Billy asks once they're alone in his car.
"You know they aren't."
Good. Billy nods and turns down the road heading to Loch Nora. He finds the Harrington residence easily - one of the biggest, ugliest homes he's ever seen - and pulls up the driveway right next to the beemer.
Steve raises an eyebrow as Billy kills the engine. "Wow. You're that confident you're getting lucky tonight, huh?"
Billy wears his most charming smile as he turns to face him. He slowly reaches his hand out and rests his palm against Steve's cheek. Strokes his thumb in gentle circles over the soft skin.
"What are you talking about honey? I'm not done playing house with you is all."
He hears Steve's breath stutter. Sees his throat bob as he swallows. Can already smell how wet Billy is going to make him once they go inside.
"Oh," he manages to mumble before awkwardly stumbling out of the car.
Billy walks with him to the front entrance and watches with cruel glee as Steve fumbles with his keys at the door.
"Oh darling," he purrs, crowding up against his back, "you seem nervous. Everything ok?"
Steve stops and closes his eyes for a second. Breathes deep. Slowly returns to putting the correct key in the lock. The door swings open and he steps inside, ignoring Billy as he slinks along behind him like a lion stalking its prey.
His grin widens as he watches Steve walk straight toward the liquor cabinet and pull out a fancy looking bottle of wine. The way he deftly slides his long fingers between the stems of two glasses and sets them on the counter. God he's fucking sexy.
"Got something there for me honey?" Billy asks as he presses up behind Steve's shoulder.
"...Yes dear," Steve answers softly, voice a little awkward in it's delivery. Billy can see he's into it though. He just needs some time to relax, adjust, and get ready for the long ride.
Billy's mouth waters at the thought.
They sip their wine, though Steve burns through his glass much quicker than Billy. Billy barely has his jacket off and Steve is already going back for a second glass.
"Long day, sweetie?" Billy asks, the way a good husband, a good father would talk to his wife. "Taking such good care of the kids must have really tired you out."
Steve's breath shakes and he takes another sip of wine. His hands fidget with the glass as he slowly turns to face Billy, though his eyes are focused on the remaining wine sloshing around in his cup.
"You think I'm good with them?" He asks, finally meeting Billy's stare.
"Oh darling," Billy murmurs as he takes Steve's glass out of his hand and sets it down on the counter. "You're perfect with them. The way they look at you-" he presses a kiss to the corner of Steve's lips, "-the way they all love you," he presses another to his jaw.
"You're the best mother a boy could ever hope for." Billy murmurs it into Steve's ear and gently drags his teeth over the skin of his earlobe.
"Really?" Steve breathes, like he hadn't actually meant to speak.
Billy bites down gently. Tugs back and lets go, then starts to press more kisses down the nape of Steve's neck. "Come to bed with me, and I'll show you hmm?"
Steve nods. Billy can hear his breathing start to quicken, can almost feel his heart racing under his palm.
He lets Billy lead him up the stairs without any resistance. To Billy's surprise, Steve doesn't say a word when Billy guides him into his parents' bedroom instead of his own. He just watches with those warm, wide eyes as Billy flicks on the bedside lamp and turns back to him. Lets out a breath he's been holding as Billy slides his hands under Steve's sweater, tracing the lean muscles under his skin with his fingers.
Billy undresses him slowly, reverently, like he's something precious to be handled with care. Once Steve's clothes are on the floor, Billy gives him another kiss. It's nice and slow, and Steve sighs as Billy drags his teeth over his lower lip when they're forced to pull apart.
Billy strips down, enjoying the way Steve stares hungrily at his cock as it bobs free of his jeans. His clothes barely hit the floor before he's pushing Steve back and falling into bed with him. Now that he's started, he can't stop himself from kissing Steve's stained lips until they're wet and swollen.
"Don't worry sweetheart," Billy whispers against flushed skin. "Daddy's gonna take care of you tonight."
He grabs the little bottle of lube he'd brought from his pile of clothes. Harrington gets a good view of his ass, so he doesn't complain about the short wait. Just bites his lip and watches as Billy sits back on his haunches and slicks himself up.
Steve parts his legs easily for Billy, letting him settle between his thighs as he looks up at him. The mattress dips around Billy's knees as he wraps an arm around Harrington's leg. He slides his hand underneath slowly, then squeezes his ass.
The little gasp Harrington lets out makes Billy's already leaking cock twitch. Gently, he lowers his hand down to his thigh. slowly trails his fingers off until they rest behind his knee. Keeping his eyes glued to Steve's, Billy licks his lips.
He grips Steve's leg and hooks his knee over Billy's shoulder. They slot together perfectly. Billy is rewarded with the sweetest little sound when he turns his head and brushes his lips over the soft skin of Harrington's inner thigh.
"F-fuck, Billy-" Steve moans, eyelashes fluttering as Billy lifts his other leg with the same careful tenderness.
"You look so beautiful from here," Billy whispers. He means it too. Even in the dim light of the room, he can see everything crystal clear. Steve's dark hair is fanned out against the soft white sheets, and his eyes are half lidded, pupils blown out wide. He looks exposed and vulnerable, and all Billy's for the taking.
So he takes him. Fingers him open and fucks him nice and slow, makes sure Steve really feels every thrust inside him. He wants to make him ache, make him remember what Billy has done to him all day tomorrow. Wants to make sure Steve knows what Billy would do for him, how well he could keep him satisfied. The ways he'd fucking worship Steve to keep him beside him always.
Because Steve is good, and perfect, and would never leave Billy to the wolves, no matter what.
He toys with Steve's tits as he rolls his hips into him. He knows how much the little slut likes it, how he loves Billy pinching and playing with his nipples almost as much as Billy loves doing it.
It doesn't take long for Harrington to come all over his stomach and chest. His voice get louder and louder, only to crack at the height of his pleasure as he squeezes tight around Billy's cock. It's more than enough to nearly finish Billy off as well. He contemplates pulling out but… they're playing house.
And Daddy is supposed to come inside Mommy, isn't he? That's how they make a baby after all.
He doesn't mean to think it. But it pushes him over the edge and he comes hard.
His brain short circuits from the sudden overwhelming pleasure. He swears and squeezes his eyes shut, fingers digging hard into soft, creamy thighs.
Then it's over. He collapses onto Steve and tries to catch his breath. Thoughts slowly begin to filter back into his head.
He didn't pull out.
Steve doesn't complain. If anything he only pulls Billy closer, like he's trying to take his cum deeper inside.
Part of Billy is grateful that Steve was born without certain parts. Otherwise he might have to start taking their little roleplay a lot more seriously.
As they both try to steady their breathing and come down from the adrenaline high, Billy takes in the mess they've made of each other.
Steve looks gone, he's such a mess. Billy's marked him up all over, mapped out between the little constellations all over his body. His hair is a mess, and his cheeks are pink, and he's fucking covered in his own spend.
Billy's eyes zero in on a small drop of cum that's splashed onto Steve's chest, right over his nipple.
Billy doesn't think, just lets his body move on instinct to shift over and lick it up. Steve shudders and whimpers sweetly as Billy starts to tug at the little bud with his teeth. Wraps his lips around it and suckles.
Steve's moan is loud, and for a second he worries he's hurt him. But then he wraps his arms around Billy's head. His fingers twist tightly into blonde curls as he holds Billy against his chest. Both of them are spent and tired, but Billy doesnt stop sucking, and Steve just strokes his fingers over Billy's scalp.
"That's- ah! G-good boy…" Steve whispers softly to him. Billy hums. Closes his eyes and keeps suckling as Steve holds him close. He thinks he can hear his heartbeat. Or maybe it's just the rush of Billy's blood pumping. It doesn't matter. He doesnt feel like worrying about anything right now.
"You're so good," Steve murmurs again. "You're so good for me, Billy."
It's over after that. Billy is ruined. He's ruined for anyone but Steve Harrington, who is good and beautiful, and apparently Billy's perfect match when it comes to their secret fucked up kinks. There's no coming back from this.
Steve hums to him as Billy's mouth moves on it's own, his brain long since removed from the situation. He feels like he's floating, held together by someone who truly loves him. Loves all of him.
The song Steve hums sounds familiar, but he can't place it. Most likely some pop song from the radio. Billy tries to think of the name and falls asleep before it comes to him.
—
Something changes after that. Another wall has broken between them and any lingering hesitation ends. Both of them are on the level now. They both know the other's dirty secrets. Can both probably guess at the ones neither has brought up yet.
For an early Christmas gift, Billy buys Steve pretty lingerie and makeup, along with a little plug to keep himself open and wet with.
Steve buys him a suit. A nice one that brings out the blue in his eyes. Something a man fit to be courting the Harrington heir would be seen in. Tells him to wear it next time he comes over.
So he does.
When Billy knocks on the door all dressed up, Steve answers in heels, stockings, and a white dress that ends at his knees.
Billy fucks him right on the living room floor. Doesn't even wait for Steve to get undressed, he just bends him over, hikes the dress up and yanks the pretty silk panties he finds down to his knees.
He's pretty sure they'll both have some nasty rug burns tomorrow, but Billy doesn't care. He fucks Steve hard and fast. Digs his fingers into his hips and lets his breath ghost over his ear with each thrust. Billy feels like a man possessed as he growls and fucks into Harrington's perfect ass. He doesn't even realize he's speaking out loud when he swears that he's going to fuck a goddamn baby into his belly.
Its dumb, it's impossible, it makes no sense, and both of them cum harder than they ever have before.
—
Obviously all bets are off after that. Billy knows Steve will take anything Billy wants to give him. Steve knows Billy will act the brute, but with just one word he'll bend to Steve's every command.
They never talk about it outside the bedroom. But Billy is pretty sure Steve feels the same as he does. Like they're on exactly the same wavelength.
It's not that he wants Steve to be a girl. He knows Steve doesn't want to be one either. But something about him dressing the part and acting the mother they've both obviously dreamed of having… It scratches an itch deep under Billy's skin and bones. He likes girls, he likes boys, he likes when he can't tell the fucking difference. He likes pretty things. He likes to feel wanted. He loves to feel wanted.
Steve makes him feel wanted.
Steve is it. He's everything. Everything Billy could ever dream of and then some.
Billy pretends to enjoy annoying and teasing Steve most, but in the deep, dark cavern of his ribs, all he wants to do is lay Steve down and worship at the altar of his body.
He wants to taste him, smell him, run his fingers over every inch of that soft, pale skin. Promise him everything, pledge his goddamn soul to him. Swear to serve him faithfully for eternity. All he wants in return is for Steve to do the same for him.
He would too, Billy realizes one evening when Steve is over at the trailer watching a movie with him. They're on the couch, and the girls are both out for the night. Billy's head is in Steve's lap and Steve is running his fingers through the curls at Billy's temple. His other hand rests over Billy's shoulder, holding him close. It's like being in a trance state, these moments with Steve. Moments where they both can simply be together, comfortable in each other's unspoken adoration.
Steve has become a part of Billy. An integral part, something he can't imagine going without again.
So when Steve leaves for the holidays to be with his parents in Chicago for two weeks, Billy doesn't know what to do with himself. He can't remember how he used to deal with being on his own anymore. Without Steve around, he feels lost and nothing he does seems to help.
While he's gone, Billy breaks a guy's nose at a party. He doesn't even remember why, he'd been too drunk to recall at that point. He blacks out trying to calm the restless itch under his skin and wakes up feeling it ten times worse.
A week goes by. Billy thinks about driving to Chicago. Instead, he drives to Indianapolis. Pulls up to the closest gay bar and tries to fuck the first guy that shows interest. Anything to stop this twisted, longing feeling in his gut.
They're in the bathroom's furthest stall. The guy is on his knees, unzipping Billy's jeans. He's murmuring praises, he's hot as hell, he's doing everything Billy likes, and yet... Billy can't get it up.
It's horrifying. He's never had an issue before. Hell, there have been times he's needed to force himself to stay hard when fucking someone.
He's never had to force it with Steve. No, Steve Harrington could smile in his general direction and Billy would be fully torqued in seconds. But no matter what the handsome stranger does, Billy's dick won't rise for him.
Why should it? He already knows that anyone other than Steve is going to be a vast downgrade. How could anyone else understand what Billy needed now? And if Steve knew what he was up to… Christ. The disappointment he'd have in Billy.
They hadn't exactly pinned down whatever the fuck was going on between them. Boyfriends were not allowed in Hawkins. Not for them. So it's not as though they're dating. They never said they were exclusive. But Billy knows. He knows that even the thought of straying would hurt Steve.
Billy's weak points might be exposed but Steve's were just as obvious. His abandonment issues were just as bad as Billy's, maybe even worse when it came to things like infidelity.
He pictures Steve with tears in his pretty doe eyes. Can see him turning away while he pretends to be fine. Can see the note he'd leave before abandoning Billy forever.
He recoils from his current partner like he's been burned and quickly zips himself back up. Shoves the guy out of the way and storms out. He hears the guy's voice call after him, but Billy ignores him. He slips out the back exit to an alley and throws up on the street.
Scum of the earth, that's what I am, he thinks, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand. Another deadbeat asshole who runs around on his wife and drives her out. Another weak excuse for a father who doesn't actually care about his family. Another goddamn piece of shit who ruins everything.
He has to pull over once on the drive back to Hawkins. He throws up again, but manages to hold it together after that long enough to get home.
Steve told Billy he would be gone for two weeks. The day after the bar incident Billy calls the airport to see when the next flight to Chicago is. He's halfway through buying a plane ticket when he hears the beep of someone else trying to call him.
He hangs up on the ticket person once she tells him the cost and checks the voice mail.
"Hey Billy. It's me. It's Steve. Uh. Sorry, I hope I didn't catch you at a bad time. Just wanted to let you know I came home a few days early. Surprise? I guess?"
Billy's entire body is frozen in place. No way. He doesn't get nice things like this. He doesn't deserve them.
Steve rambles on about the last minute change of plans and lets him know the front door is unlocked if Billy wants to come over, "-but don't worry about it if you can't, I know it's pretty late already. I guess I'll. I don't know. I'll see you around."
The message is barely done playing before Billy slams the phone down and grabs his coat.
---
Billy pulls up to Steve's house in record time. He walks inside like he owns the place but doesn't find Steve on the main floor. So he heads up the stairs. Takes long, heavy strides to the end of the hall, to Steve's bedroom. Opens the door and walks in to see his boy perched on the edge of the bed. His back is to Billy, but he can see Steve's arms wrapped around himself tightly.
Billy's rotten heart aches for him. He thought he'd be alone. He thought Billy might not come for him.
The sound of the door opening catches Steve's attention. He turns to face him, arms quickly falling to his side. His eyes widen and his lips part so sweetly as he whispers Billy's name like a prayer.
Billy crosses the room without looking away from him. He can't look away from him. Can't risk him disappearing again, leaving Billy alone with all his anger and misery and longing.
He kisses Steve hard, hard enough to bruise those pretty, pretty lips that Billy can't stop thinking about. Swallows down Steve's sweet little moans as Billy pushes them both onto the bed.
Once Billy starts touching, he can't stop. He can't let go of Steve for more than a couple seconds at a time. Can't risk Steve forgetting him, deciding distance is best for them again. Leaving him. He can't.
So Billy does everything he can to try and please him and make sure he stays. He bites and kisses at Steve's lovely neck, and leaves his mark just a little too high for him to cover easily. He licks a trail between the different marks speckling Steve's lithe, pale body. Cups his hands over perky little tits and rolls his nipples with his thumbs. Squeezes the soft flesh and growls low in his throat when he hears Steve whimper sweetly.
"Missed you," Billy whispers against Steve's ear. "Fuck, missed you so fucking much." He rolls his earlobe between his teeth and kisses his neck again.
"Thought you might never come back," he admits without thinking.
His control must be slipping. As soon as he says it, Steve stops writhing against him. Then he puts a gentle hand on Billy's chest and sits up. Pushes Billy back just enough to get close to him and cradles his hands around his face.
"Never. I would never do that to you," he says, quietly but firmly. "Do you hear me?"
He waits until Billy gives him a stiff nod. Then he sighs and presses his forehead gently against Billy's.
"I'm not going anywhere. Not again. Not without you."
They've never talked about where each other's obvious fucking issues come from, but Billy knows that Steve has put together enough pieces. He knows where Billy is most exposed, and what would hurt him the most.
Steve's thumb brushes something wet off Billy's cheek. Tears. Fuck, when had he started crying? That wasn't supposed to happen. He was supposed to have control. He always had control.
His first instinct is to pull away, but Steve won't let him. Instead he keeps his hands on Billy's face and leans in to kiss him. It's soft and tender, and Billy can only assume it's the kind of kiss the fairy tales he used to read as a kid described.
Because he knows now. He knows he's in love, or at least something just as deep and obsessive. It feels like a blessing and a curse, because he knows now that he'll never be free of it after this.
Tears keep coming despite his best efforts to stop. Steve doesn't make fun of him or worse, demand they talk about it. Instead he keeps kissing him as he slowly unbuttons his shirt. Then he lifts his hand up and gently guides Billy's face down to his chest. He doesn't say anything, just breathes out a sigh as Billy instantly latches on to a soft brown nipple.
They're both hard but neither of them do anything about it. They simply lie there for a while while Billy suckles on his nipple. His eyes feel heavy, and Steve's sweet little sighs of pleasure relax him better than a shot of morphine.
"-'s good… you're so good, Billy, I'm right here, I promise…"
He hears Steve swallow, feels his hands tighten their grip and fingers tangle through his hair.
"I love you, Billy," Steve says, voice barely a whisper. "Mommy loves you, baby."
For once, Billy believes it.
–---