Chapter Text
"Are you lost Harrington?"
It was mid-morning and a thick mist had begun to roll over the ground between the trees. It was probably going to rain soon. Steve knew the question was rhetorical, he knew his way around these woods very well and this spot happened to be one that Munson had made notorious at Hawkin’s High, for dealing drugs.
“Nah actually I was on my way back from your mom’s house.”
“Ha ha ha. That would’ve been a good one, if I had a mom.” Munson had a pocket knife out and he was whittling away at a stick, perched on the notorious picnic table, elbows resting on spread knees and a metal lunch box next to him.
“Right… Shit sorry man.” But Eddie was smirking, and obviously unbothered by the quip. He had on a faded, worn gray T-shirt and extremely baggy old black leather jacket, as well as some tattered black jeans and platform combat boots. The eccentric style, the way his chains dangled over his hips, and the way he was sitting made Steve swallow.
Since he’d come to know Eddie in the days of the Vecna-pocalypse, he’d learned some troubling things about himself, all having to do with this terrifying, unprecedented attraction to the man sitting right in front of him. His outfit, his jewelry, his voice (oh god his voice), really everything about this man had started to make Steve sweat when he focused just a little too closely on the details.
Ridiculous
But that wasn’t why he was here. There were worse things to worry about.
"Do you always dress like this?" Steve said, in an attempt to suffocate his shame over the unwanted attraction. Falling back on what he knew, if someone starts to make you feel insecure, make them insecure first.
This never really worked on Eddie.
"Yeah. Do you always dress like a PTA mom's wet dream?" Munson answered, standing up and opening the lunchbox on the table next to him. Steve raised his eyebrows and looked at his clothes. He’d thought he looked pretty basic, nice even. He was wearing tan khaki pants, a white button down and an argyle pattern baggy vest over it.
“What’s wrong with this?”
Eddie snorted, “Harrington, you’re the first person that I’ve ever dealt to, who’s been wearing a sweater vest during the transaction.” Steve’s cheeks pinked a bit, he hadn’t thought much about it but he was certainly alarmed at how much he cared what Eddie thought of his outfit.
“Whatever, let’s just get this over with.” He said feigning annoyance.
“Got somewhere to be?'' Eddie said, pulling out his selection of “goods” and spreading them over the table.
“Yeah, out of the woods. I hate it out here.”
“From what I heard you used to spend a lot of time out here.” Munson wiggled his eyebrows at him.
“Yeah well, that was before all the monsters and shit.” He said and wrapped his arms around his middle where his scars were. He half expected Eddie to tease him, to make fun like his high school friends would have if he’d said something like that, but he just cocked his head to the side,
“Do you want to talk about it?” The Freak asked. Steve’s heart fluttered and he berated himself.
“Nope. How much for a gram?” Eddie considered him for what felt like way too long. Steve recalled the first time they’d met face to face. The broken glass bottle against his neck had been intimidating, sure, but those eyes… Sometimes it felt like Eddie could read your thoughts if he stared at you long enough.
Finally he said,
“You can have 2 grams for free if you tell me why you want it. Didn’t think this was really your sort of thing Harrington.”
Steve was shocked, “Seriously? C’mon man that’s got to be expensive, what’s in it for you?”
“Nothing, I just have a feeling I know why you need it.” His eyes were soft, and they stared at one another for a second. A shared understanding of the horrors they’d both faced a few weeks ago.
Steve rolled his eyes, pretending to be annoyed, but secretly relishing that he might have someone to talk to about this, who might understand. Eddie had seen that cheerleader twisted to pieces, nothing could prepare a person to witness something like that. And those bats…
Steve climbed up on the table to sit next to him and pulled a cigarette and lighter out of his pocket, Eddie stared at them earnestly so Steve offered him one, which he took wordlessly.
“I can’t stop reliving it.” Steve said finally.
“God, which part.” Eddie said, snatching the lighter out of Steve's hand before Steve could light his cigarette. He glared at Eddie but the glare softened as he watched him place the cigarette between his lips and light it with intense focus, the flame from the lighter flickering in his eyes. Steve swallowed again.
Eddie tossed the lighter back to him. Steve lit it quickly and took a long drag. He willed the chemicals to help clear his head.
“All of it really, everything from the past couple years. Too many close calls, too many fights with monsters, but it’s the nightmares that get to me.”
He felt so vulnerable suddenly, he’d never opened up this much to someone who wasn’t a girl, or Dustin. His father had made sure of that.
“I hear you man, at least once a week a dream of that thing just absolutely tearing me to pieces… And oh god, those little shits with wings… their fangs…” He shuddered.
“I know… but the weird part is- and you can’t judge me for this okay- I’m never back in the upside down, I’m either at work, or back at Starcourt, or… back at the graveyard with Max, and it’s never me… you know, it’s always those little shitheads. Dying on me, getting torn to pieces, having their- their eyes sucked out of their head, their bones snapping and crunching… and all I can do is watch.”
Eddie stared at him in silent shock for a bit “Jesus Christ Steve… I should give you three grams for free.” Steve opened his mouth to decline but before he could a crack of thunder tore through the sky above them and Steve flinched hard. Black clouds had rolled in overhead. Eddie swore and started to put his paraphernalia in the lunchbox where it would be protected if it started to rain.
Steve felt a familiar sense of unease and anxiety pull at his chest, and his breath quickened. Too many things reminded him of the upside down now, including dark storm clouds and thunder.
“Can we go somewhere else? I don’t want to get caught up in this storm.” He said, trying to sound casual. As if on cue it started to pour. Eddie stared up at the sky and blinked raindrops out of his eyes disapprovingly.
"Well we could head back to the armpit that is my house but I doubt that would be up to your royal highness's standards." Steve felt a twinge of hurt at that, he knew he could be a douche but he thought he’d been doing a bit better.
"After everything you still think I'm that shallow? Your place is fine dude, let's go." Steve said, walking in the direction of where he’d parked.
“Harrington,” Eddie called “This way, I’ll drive.” Steve just wanted to be out of the storm but nodded anyway and followed him the opposite direction. The rain got thick enough that it was getting hard to see. When the next boom of thunder rang out, Steve tripped over a root on the ground and fell directly to his hands and knees into the mud. He couldn’t tell if he was more frightened or embarrassed at that moment, but he couldn’t find it in himself to get up, he just froze staring at the ground, distant rumbles of thunder taking him back to that terrible place…
He jumped at the sensation of a hand on his back. “Steve, are you okay? what happened?” The concern in his voice grounded Steve a bit and he sat back on his heels. Eddie usually called him by his last name…
“Shit! I just slipped, I’m fine.” Then he noticed the trickle of blood running down his hand and down his forearm. “Goddamnit!” he said and wiped the blood on his khakis. A new river of blood just took its place. Eddie offered him his hand and Steve took it with his uninjured one, letting himself be hoisted to his feet. He probably looked ridiculous, covered in mud and looking like a drowned animal.
His stomach fluttered when they stayed with their hands touching for just a moment longer than was probably necessary. Eddie cleared his throat and looked around.
“Ah ha!” He grabbed Steve's elbow and led him over to a small hollow in some rocks. It looked like it provided just enough shelter to stay dry.
***
"Woah, watch your step princess." Eddie said as Steve stumbled over some rocks, He placed a hand on the side of Steve’s waist to stop him from nearly falling again. He felt the King of Hawkins tense under his touch, and then lean into him for support. He was a mess, and Eddie would have been delighted about it, if he wasn’t too busy being concerned.
“Fuck! I can’t see!” Steve cursed in frustration.
“Almost there.” Eddie said and guided him underneath the rock. They had to crouch but it was mostly dry. Steve aggressively wiped water out of his eyes once they were sheltered and accidentally smeared blood from his hand all over his face.
“Let me see that.” Eddie grabbed Steve’s wrist and inspected the cut.
“It’s nothing, just leave it.”
Eddie rolled his eyes. Steve always had to present himself as this tough guy, even when no one was watching. Eddie used to find this annoying but now all he could think was how exhausting it must have been.
He pulled out an old bandana from his pocket and began to wrap Steve's hand tightly.
“Wait don't- You’re ruining it.” Steve protested.
“It’s old.”
“But-”
“You don’t have to be the tough guy right now Steve, just let me help you. No one’s watching.” Steve stared at him for a second, his eyes looked so soft and he looked so vulnerable, soaking wet hair, dripping down his neck, Eddie wondered what it would be like to bite him there. Then he forced the thought away and continued wrapping his hand. Steve tugged at the bottom hem of his sweater with his free hand, his face was red and he looked all around them, trying to distract himself.
“Don’t think about the weather, tell me about something that will distract you.” He hadn’t missed Steve’s anxiousness over the storm.
“Like what?” He asked softly, sounding a little defeated.
“I don’t know… Tell me about Wheeler. Are you guys a thing yet?”
Steve scoffed, “No, and I’d rather not talk about that.”
“Why not?” Eddie hated himself for feeling a little hopeful.
“Never gonna happen. Actually I think I’m probably her worst nightmare.”
“That's a bit harsh. Why do you say that? Pretty boy like you has a chance with whomever he pleases.”
“Don’t call me that.” Steve said, sounding more petulant than angry.
“What? Pretty boy? Sorry but that’s what you are Harrington.”
“I am not. I’m a grown man, and you are the one with long hair and bangs, so if anyone is pretty it’s you.”
“Oh reeeally?” Eddie said, tying off the makeshift bandage and leaning forward.
“I didn’t- that’s not- That came out wrong.” Steve stuttered. Eddie was on cloud nine. Watching Steve get flustered shifted something inside him.
“Just because you were a jock, doesn’t make you any less of a pretty boy. How much time do you spend doing your hair so it's juuuust perfect everyday Harrington? Believe it or not I’ve been to a basketball game or two, do you miss your tight little shorty-shorts you manly-men run around in?” Eddie wasn’t sure why he was trying to get a rise out of Steve, but he couldn’t seem to stop himself.
"We did not wear 'shorty-shorts' we wore basketball shorts."
"And how would you describe your ‘basketball shorts’ ? Long and baggy?”
"Well no…Shut up."
"You know what Freud said about male athletes?"
“Am I gonna give a shit Munson?”
“He thought,” Eddie went on, ignoring him “That men use sports to channel their repressed homoerotic tendencies.”
“That’s the biggest bunch of bullshit I’ve ever heard in my life.” and to Eddie’s surprise he actually laughed. “Men don’t play sports because we’re gay, we play sports because we all secretly hate each other and want to beat the shit out of one another, and that’s illegal. Honestly we’d all probably be better off if it were for your reason.” Steve said fiddling with the bandage on his hand.
Now it was Eddie’s turn to laugh in shock at Steves honesty, and lack of disgust. He wasn’t sure why he’d expected Steve to be homophobic, but apparently the idea didn’t bother him. Eddie’s stomach fluttered.
No.
“So Wheeler’s a no go huh?”
Steve kicked at the ground. "We were-I was in love…for a long time. But it all turned out to be… bullshit." his voice cracked a little on the word. "Love is no fairytale Munson."
“Shit dude… I’m sorry about that.”
“Yeah well. It’s fine I deserve what I got.”
“I don’t think that’s true.”
“No it is, I was a real asshole.”
“I remember. You had a reputation. But no one deserves to have their heart broken.”
“That’s your opinion. I deserve a lot of things.”
Again Eddie thought about how hesitant Steve was to let him bandage his hand. After a silent pause while they watched the rain trickling over their little hiding place he asked,
"Do you think you deserve to be punished?"
Steve blinked at him “What?”
“You have too much self hatred, for someone who’s really not that bad of a guy.” Eddie leaned into Steve’s personal space and didn’t miss the younger man’s breath catching when they were a half a centimeter from their cheeks touching. Steve appeared to tense up as Eddie reached down to Steve's hip.
“I like you Steve, I think you should learn to like yourself too.” Then he reached into Steve's pocket and pulled out his pack of cigarettes and sat back where he'd been perched before.
Steve breathed out the breath he’d been holding. “Oh, help yourself.” But his voice sounded shaky. Eddie smirked.
“Okay.” he said smarmily and lit up another cigarette.
They sat smoking and talking for the next several minutes, waiting for the storm to pass. Eddie had been testing Steve and he hoped he was right about him because the longer they sat cramped in that tiny space together, and he had to watch Steve wrap his full lips around the cigarette in his hand and the wet hair falling over his long eyelashes, he was finding it harder and harder not to reach out and grab him by his stupid sweater vest and ravish his stupidly gorgeous neck.
When the rain started to die down, he tossed Steve a bag of weed.
“Um this is more than a couple grams…” Steve said.
“That’s alright, Consider it an apology for almost slitting your throat that one time.” Eddie shut the lunch box and flicked the latches closed. And crawled out from under the little enclave.
“Wait… Eddie.” Steve said, his voice sounded smaller than he’d ever heard it before.
“Yeah?”
“Don’t leave me.” He pleaded in a near whisper.
Eddie’s heart twinged at that. He wanted to grab him, and pull him into his arms and run his fingers through his hair and tell him, I’m not going anywhere.
“I’m not leaving you, come with me, the rain’s pretty much died down.” And he reached out a hand and Steve who looked absolutely mortified at himself, took it. “You can hang out at my place for a while… If you want.”
“That’d be great.” Steve said, still quiet.
“Maybe you can share your big bag of weed with me.” He said, trying to lighten the mood.
“Only if you stop stealing my cigarettes.”