Chapter Text
Hunter angerly mumbled to himself while sitting in his room, kicking his feet at the air. "Why does everyone treat me like a fragile little kid!?" He tugged at his hair, hoping it would ground him. It didnt.
Everyone treated him like one wrong move and he would die. Well guess what? He had survives belos. He had survived the day of unity. He had survived being stuck in the human realm. He didn't need to be babied.
Everyone tip-toed around mentioning belos when he was around, everyone tried to make sure he was okay, everyone made sure he didn't have anything dangerous. He was so sick of it.
Despite this, he had gotten in a few arguments with Darius and Lilith, but it wss half his fault right? Because he's just a bratty teenager. They apologized after but the mental damage had been done.
But that doesn't mean he's a baby! He's strong. He's strong enough to handle this all.
Hunter sat up snd stared at his hands. They looked just like everyone else's hands. Real, flesh. The hands of a person. A little scarred and scrapped up but you wouldn't ever know he's a fake. He hugged himself. He was realm. He was breathing and thinking. And yet he wanted to cry. As much as he wanted to tell himself he had a right to be here, he knew he was just stolen parts. He forced himself up and out of bed now.
He walked downstairs after pulling on a sweater and combing his hair with his hands. It had gotten slightly longer, almost enough to tie up if he wanted. But he probably wouldn't, that would just make him resemble belos more than he already did. He walked into the kitchen and sat next to Luz, not saying anything as he listened to Luz and Eda talk about something. He wasn't paying to much attention to what it was.
"You need some breakfast, kiddo?"
"Uh- yeah sure" Hunter responded half on auto pilote. Breakfast? He wasn't even real why did he need to eat? Why did his body still require pointless things like food and sleep to survive if he was made to be better than that? Just making him more useless. He ate while silently screaming at himself for needing the basic fuel. Pretending to be interested in whatever topic Luz had forced him into a conversation about. He caught the concerned glances from Eda out of the corner of his veiw, but he needed to keep acting like he was okay.
"Wiat! Where's cool aunt lilith?"
"Luz will you stop calling her that" Hunter groaned
"Trying to fix the collapsing government."
"Oh. Yeah, that. I forgot"
"How'd you forget about that!?"
"Disconnect from the current situation? I don't know, I forget a lot of things I don't like"
"Kid that's not.."
"Healthy? I'm working on it so please don't lecture me about self care again."
"Alright but you need to tell me if something is wrong"
"Well nothing is wrong!"
Nothing is wrong. Nothing besides the thoughts of starving himself to prove if he's really alive. It wasn't a new thought per say, but it had become a lot more difficult to ignore lately.
No one could know he was thinking like this. Eda already (lovingly) lectured him for sleeping in a binder for months once she found out. He hated taking it off to sleep, but he knew it was just to keep him healthy. Did it really matter though? If he was healthy?
.
.
.
Hunter expressed this thinking to flapjack while crying locked away in his room. His bird chipped and poked at his cheek concerned.
'You're okay. You're not broken. Your real.' Flapjack said in some language hunter wasn't sure how he understood.
"Flapjack. I'm not good enough."
'But you are.'
"But I'm not! You're the closest thing to family I have! Emotionally and quite literally to! I'm not a person I'm a bunch of wood and scales and bones and some other crap thrown together and called a person!"
Flapjack kept pecking at him and he sighed. Asking for the little bird to get into staff form. He was reluctant but did as he said.
He needed to be alone. No one could see what he was going to do.
He needed proof that he was real. He'd spent the last few weeks thinking of how to get proof and starving kept seeming like a good option, but he'd already eaten and had time to digest it. He needed something else. He walked out of his room and through the living room into the kitchen. Hoping Eda wouldn't question him from the other room. If she did ask he could just say he was getting a snack. He quickly slipped a knife into his hoodie pocket and then opened the fridge and grabbed something to make a reason he was in there, even if that meant eating more.
"Watcha doing, kid?"
He was right he was going to be questioned. "I wanted a snack, sorry"
"Hey, no its okay"
"Alright.." He felt bad lying but it was to late now he supposed.
He quickly went back to his room and locked the door again. Pulling out the knife he didn't know what he was thinking now. Prove you're real by slicing your skin open as deep as you can? He really didn't want the pain but he couldn't handle thinking like this anymore. The constant worry of wether or not he's real. Alive enough to give basic respect.
Hunter watched as blood dripped down his forearm. It was a deep cut. He pulled at the skin and stared at the layers underneath. It was deep enough to make him dizzy after a few minutes. He grabbed the makeshift first aid kit he had hidden under his bed and wrapped up his arm.
Nobody had to know. It would be fine.
Hunter hid the first aid kid and knife under his bed again, he didn't think anyone would notice one missing knife right?