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Jeongin has just gotten under the covers, finally about to drift back into his intangibly pleasant dream state, when he hears Felix moan through the wall. He cocks his head for a moment, listening harder, unsure. He has certainly never heard Felix moan like that before, but he’s sure that if he did, that’s what it would sound like.
He sits up as slowly and quietly as he can, holding his breath in order to hear better. He wishes he could shush the cicadas outside. For a moment, he thinks he hears Hyunjin talking, but he can’t make out the words, only the vague rhythms of his voice. Jeongin feels an abrupt and irrational anger well up inside of him, threatening to burst out, but he swiftly pushes it back down.
He knows that harboring a huge crush on Felix doesn’t mean he magically has the right to scorn Hyunjin for dating him. He knows it logically, but his heart ignores him, continuing to beat out of his chest with jealousy.
Hyunjin continues talking. Felix responds, and Jeongin figures he should just go back to sleep. Perhaps he heard wrong.
He does try, he swears. He lies back down, stretches out over his soft sheets and closes his eyes.
A few minutes later, just as he’s beginning to drift off again, he hears Felix moan louder, this time unmistakably. The room suddenly feels stifling, and he swallows uneasily before standing and quietly locking the door.
The cold floor feels almost wet under his bare feet, and it jerks him back to reality for a moment. But it's a moment too short for the guilt to set in.
He can already feel his cock stiffening. He knows he’s going to jerk off either way, now, and he might never get this chance again, so he figures he may as well accept it.
He sits against the wall where his room connects to Felix’s and leans his head back to rest against it. As Felix moans again, Jeongin closes his eyes to better imagine what’s happening on the other side of the plaster. His left hand finds its way into his underwear, as if on reflex.
It would be a lie to say that Jeongin had never thought of Felix like this, had never imagined him pliant and sweet underneath his fingertips.
He hasn’t heard any noise from Hyunjin in a few minutes, so he makes the educated guess that his mouth is occupied; he imagines himself in that position instead, looking up at Felix, pleasuring him with his mouth like his life depends on it.
As Felix’s moans get louder, Jeongin strokes himself slowly, angling his hand in the way he knows will make him come quickly. He imagines the face Felix must be making right now: head thrown back, exposing his neck with his pretty mouth wide open as he moans, ignorant to Jeongin listening intently.
Felix’s cries reach a crescendo, and Jeongin finally comes, covering his mouth while Felix calls Hyunjin’s name. Jeongin tries – and fails – to block it out and imagine it’s his own. He opens his eyes, fantasy broken, and Felix’s bright laugh shocks him out of his stupor. Hurriedly, he cleans himself up with tissues, red-hot shame overtaking his face. He sits on the bed with his head resting in his hands, contemplating what the fuck he’s just done.
Then, he hears Felix and Hyunjin moan at the same time and wonders if they hate him.
Curiosity piqued once again, he listens intently, trying to figure out what they’re doing this time. He hears nothing for a few moments, then the bed begins to squawk rhythmically; Jeongin’s eyes widen.
Felix swears loudly in English and all noises stop at once.
A few tense seconds pass and Jeongin wonders if he needs to swallow his feelings and go check on them. However, before he makes up his mind, the bed starts to squeak again, louder and louder, as if Hyunjin is getting more confident. (Jeongin just knows Hyunjin tops. He can imagine the face Felix is probably making right now, sweaty and gasping as Hyunjin pounds into him.) Felix’s moans and curses get louder as well, accompanying the bed.
Swearing quietly, Jeongin takes his cock out again, unable to resist, and jerks himself in time to the bed’s movement. They’re so loud that he can hear them even over the rapid pounding of his heart from his own mattress.
He tries thrusting up into his hand, imagining that he’s thrusting inside of Felix instead. It works very well.
As Felix’s noises get louder, Jeongin covers his own mouth, lest he give himself away. He can almost make out the sound of skin on skin, and he shudders, unwittingly picturing it clearly in his mind.
He can hear them talking quietly between Felix’s moans, but still can’t make out any words. He imagines that Hyunjin is asking Felix if he’s alright, softly guiding him and making sure he feels good.
Suddenly, Felix whines, high and needy, and Jeongin comes. For the second time. As his pleasure fades, shame replaces it once more, spilling throughout his body until he shivers with disgust at his own actions.
He slowly cleans himself up again as he listens to Felix and Hyunjin giggling at each other, then hides his face in his hands, suddenly reminded of when his relationship with Felix started to take a strange turn.
Jeongin had first started taking notice of his attraction towards Felix during a photoshoot. At the time, he had realized that he had to lean down to put his head on Felix’s shoulder, and as the photographer urged him to hold Felix tighter, he saw how large a portion of Felix’s waist his hands curled around.
That feeling of intimacy, of Felix pressed up against him, made him unable to think properly. And the sight of his hands spanning nearly the entirety of Felix’s waist still haunts his daydreams to this day. But he’s often woken from them by the thought that Hyunjin’s hands are nearly the same, and much more experienced with holding that pretty waist.
An hour later, Jeongin still can’t get back to sleep. He sighs and swings his legs off the bed, padding into the kitchen.
Hyunjin had told Felix that everything would be fine, but here they are, right in the middle of what could certainly be considered “a situation”.
Felix is sitting on the kitchen counter with Hyunjin standing in between his legs, kissing him. (They got sidetracked while trying to make breakfast…) Felix felt like something would go wrong, but Hyunjin reassured him that it was still early, and Jeongin and Seungmin wouldn’t get up if they didn’t have to.
However. As he feels himself starting to get hard from Hyunjin sucking and kissing his neck, he hears a noise. A distinctly human noise. In the kitchen doorway, in full view of Hyunjin and Felix’s ‘activities’.
Hyunjin is preoccupied and doesn’t pay any heed to it, but Felix opens his eyes and sees Jeongin skulking in the shadows at the entrance to the kitchen, about to step in and see everything they’re doing.
“Hyunjin!” Felix says urgently, but Hyunjin just takes it as more begging and gropes his legs, heading towards his ass. He feels sick, trying to catch Hyunjin’s hand as he makes eye contact with Jeongin. “H-hyunjin, it’s–” he stutters, stumbling over his words. Jeongin’s expression morphs from neutral to shocked as he registers Felix’s position. “Stop!” Felix says, and Hyunjin looks up at him with concern.
Hyunjin looks over his shoulder, following Felix’s gaze, and immediately steps out from between Felix’s legs to stand protectively in front of him. Felix shifts to try and hide his boner, and his thighs make an awful, loud squeak against the counter.
Jeongin is still completely still in the doorway. The counter is freezing cold, but Felix feels his face start to burn. He hangs his head, unable to bear looking in Jeongin’s eyes.
“Uh…hi, Jeongin. Sorry about…this.”
Jeongin blinks, then starts toward the cabinets, avoiding looking at them. He silently pulls a bag of chips out and it crinkles unpleasantly. As he turns toward the fridge, “Can you guys not fuck in the kitchen? Please? It’s bad enough that–” Jeongin blinks, then gives a little shake of his head as he opens the fridge door. “Or just Clorox the counter afterward. Whatever. I don’t care.”
He grabs a juice and quickly runs out of the room.
Hyunjin steps away from the counter and spins to face Felix, whose head is still down. “Felix–” Hyunjin says, reaching out to him, but Felix shies away and slides off the counter.
“Just…not now, please, Hyunjin.”
Felix walks out of the kitchen, shoulders hunched, and Hyunjin stares after him, frowning in concern.
Jeongin slams the door shut and locks it, juggling the chips and drink in his hands. He tosses them onto his nightstand and lies down in bed, trying to ignore the tent in his shorts.
The only thing filling his mind is the image of Felix’s lean thighs squished against the counter, peeking out from between his shorts and knee socks.
Jeongin pulls his pants off and lies in bed, then closes his eyes, trying to block out the sounds of summer spilling in from outside.
A knock at the door. It opens.
Enter Felix, wearing shorts, knee socks, and a shirt whose color doesn’t matter, that Jeongin wouldn’t be able to recall anyway.
Jeongin asks how he is. He shrugs. Apparently he and Hyunjin had a little disagreement. Jeongin nods sympathetically and offers a shoulder to cry on. Felix hugs him tightly and Jeongin wraps an arm around Felix’s smaller frame, tucking him into his side.
Jeongin-ah, you’ve gotten so handsome , Felix tells him. Jeongin shakes his head and denies it, but Felix insists. Then kisses him.
Jeongin pulls back, asking (only a little bit) incredulously Aren’t you dating Hyunjin? Felix claims that it doesn’t matter, that he wants Jeongin now.
Jeongin wants him more than anything. He shoves Felix down onto the bed and roughly rakes his irrelevant shirt up to his chest. He lets his hands roam from Felix’s stomach to his thighs, still above his shorts. He pulls them down to his knees, revealing Felix’s hard cock and loose hole, already prepped. Felix whines and asks Jeongin to fuck him, so he does. Hard and fast, no mercy. His shadow envelops Felix as he enters him, wrapping a hand all the way around one of his slim thighs. Jeongin kisses him. Gropes him. Holds him down. Felix’s noises are deep and desperate.
Jeongin comes.
He opens his eyes and cleans his hands off before pulling his shorts back up, then covers his face, listening to the cicadas outside.