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The shop had been bustling with people, it’s a Saturday after all. Weekends don’t act as weekends for Nayeon, managing her parents’ small restaurant hasn’t been an easy task at all. She acts as the quality manager, sometimes the cashier, the server, but mostly (and fortunately), using her degree in communications, she engages with customers to ensure that she gets the feedback to make their food and service better.
“Can you sit your ass down for a minute? You’re making me dizzy.” Jihyo’s always a constant in the shop - she only mostly orders coffee and stays there for an indefinite amount of time. Well, it’s a good place to do her design work, but also because she knows Nayeon can’t resist her and she’d get a refill without a fee. She’s basically an Im by association.
“There’s a lot of people coming in, Jih.”
“Yeah but you’re not like this everyday, only when you know that Mina’s dropping by. At this rate I’m surprised if she’s not wondering why you’re always so panicky when she’s here” Jihyo said, making sure that Nayeon gets what she’s trying to say.
Nayeon huffed. “I am not! “
“Yes you are! You’re always like this whenever she drops by! You’re always extra nervous, I don’t understand why. It’s just Mina, our friend - your long-time muse, the love of —“ Nayeon gave Jihyo a betrayed look. “Okay, why don’t you make it louder? I’m sure the customers at the other side haven’t heard you clearly yet.”
Jihyo sighed. “How long has it been, Nayeon? I haven’t been counting but I’m sure it’s been years. When will you act on it?”
Nayeon sat opposite Jihyo’s, not caring about fixing the glasses which were falling on her nose. But really, how long has it been?
She kept mum, stirring Jihyo’s coffee which she knew the latter will hate because it will make the newly served coffee cool a lot faster. She can’t keep but fidget. “You know you could always visit our apartment and hang out longer, right?”
“I know. It’s just… I don’t know. I… I don’t think I will ever, you know. I think the world’s harboring a vendetta against me, it has blocked my chances multiple times. Also, will I see her hanging out with another friend there?”
“Nayeon that was one time! And they weren’t even doing anything, just watching some TV. You, on the other hand, gave them a constipated look. Mina never brought home another friend after that because you said, and I quote, ‘wash your hands after’”, Jihyo cringed while reenacting the latter’s constipated face.
The younger girl fixed her posture and met Nayeon’s sad gaze. “Were you always like this with her when you’re in college? You know, we’re all growing up and old now, and if you don’t take the shot, you’ll never win the prize.”
Nayeon took a deep breath, laid her cheek on her arm on the table. “But what if there’s no prize waiting for me even when the shot hath been taken?”
“Ugh. I’m done with you.”
The next Saturday, Nayeon still fidgets because she knew that Mina will come by during lunch time. Mina always does.
Only this time, she’s not alone.
Nayeon really, really tried her best to avoid giving a constipated look. Mina’s friend looks very pretty - pointed jaws, very sharp eyes, almost as tall as Nayeon, and her smile’s very blinding. They weren’t holding hands when they entered the shop, but Mina has her arm hooked around the girl’s left arm.
“Hey Nay! This is Jins —“
“Uhm, take this table here, I’ll get you both some water. I’ll come back with the menu.” Nayeon turned around so quickly, looked like she’s gulping on some air. She’s now facing Jihyo’s table, with the latter giving her a big what-the-fuck look as she zoomed past their employees towards the back office.
Jihyo’s text messages came in a few minutes after she locked herself inside.
Come back here, idiot! Mina’s neck is gonna snap already, she keeps on looking at your office’s door. Come on don’t be like this, let her introduce Jinsoul to you.
Nayeon scoffed, texted back:
So you knew the girl? You knew she’d be bringing her in today, and you didn’t even tell me? You’ve been sippin’ the coffee I gave you for free for thirty minutes and this is what I get?!
The reply came in almost as soon as she replied.
What?! I didn’t know she’s gonna bring Jinsoul here. Come out here, now!
Nayeon didn’t know if it’s just because she knows that it’s going to be another busy weekend, or because Mina’s companion is so pretty, or because Jihyo’s being a pain in the ass telling her to get out of her office when she doesn’t want to, but the breath she took almost gave a burning feeling to her chest. Jinsoul.
Ha! And Jihyo even know her?! Is she a regular in their apartment? Did Jihyo leave them alone when she stays over?
Since they’re understaffed today, Nayeon had no choice but help out, but she made sure that she covers the kitchen work today rather than the PR work. She knew she’s just going to mess something up if she goes out, so she asked Lee to do the taking-care-of-the-customers today. She was busy slicing the sticky rice cakes when someone spoke at her side.
“Mina’s been asking what’s taking you so long inside. Aren’t you really going to entertain us today?”
Nayeon kept focused on her work, lip jutting like a kid as she cuts. “Nawp. I’m good here.”
“Come on Nay, don’t be a child.”
“I am a child.”
“No, you’re 22! Just don’t act like you’re a teenager on the brim of jealousy.”
The older girl stopped cutting and put her knife on the side. Took a deep breath, and looked Jihyo in the eye. “Well, I have to let you know that I am very jealous right now. Rather, envious. I envy that J-girl. Mina has got her sights on her. You don’t know how I’m trying to keep myself right now, Jih. I am very frustrated. There’s pain here, how the fuck do I get it out?” Nayeon continued as she tried to soothe her chest with her palm.
Jihyo pitied Nayeon, but she’s not going to do God’s work for the two, so she answered. “First of all, her name is Jinsoul. And, you don’t even know who’s Jinsoul for Mina. Only if you get out of here and greet them like you do with your usual customers, you would know. Or, better yet, go with us tomorrow evening? Sana’s hosting a get-together. It’s been months since we all gathered. Mina’s coming, she told me. It would be a perfect place for you to tell her, you know? When everyone’s drunk and all that,” Jihyo said.
“She’s coming with who, with that girl?”
“Ugh, her name's Jinsoul, you baboon! And even if she brings Jinsoul, she has the right to. She’s single, and who’s fault is that?”
Sana’s apartment wasn’t too big, it just enough for less than ten people to move around without banging each other’s ribs or tripping on each other’s legs. It’s cozy though, all corners are warmly lit and bright, and Dahyun has set up the music for tonight - telling everyone that she spent the whole Saturday afternoon adding songs to this party’s playlist to make sure that everything’s chill.
Nayeon’s not chill, though.
She went in the kitchen hoping that everyone’s just getting started but she found Jinsoul there, together with Mina, helping each other carry a tray full of drinks - hands touching as they fought about who will carry the drinks, laughing because some ice spilled on the tray already because of their pulling.
It was Mina who first noticed Nayeon on the kitchen door. Mina, who’s wearing their old grey university hoodie, the one Nayeon faintly remembers she was wearing when they sneaked out of their evening class to go pig out on a chips sale - Mina told her that the mart’s going to have a 50% off on all chips which were about to expire the next month. Nayeon bought three bottles of soju to go with their chips haul.
She remembered Mina’s tinted cheeks when they were two bottles down, smiling so brightly, looking at the moon while they’re on the rooftop’s mat-less floor.
Mina turned to her and leaned her head. The sky was starless but the moon's shining upon them, and Mina looked so beautiful under the moonlight. Nayeon swore her heart stopped when Mina spoke.
“I hope we always get to do this, Nayeonie. You’re my partner in crime from now on.”
Partner in crime.
How long has it been?
Nayeon thinks that Mina’s so happy. She can’t help but feel a hundred more needles prickling her chest at that moment.
After seeing Mina in the kitchen, Nayeon decided that she wouldn’t stay long in the party. Sure, she’s here for her other friends as well, but God knows how she gathered herself the past twenty-four hours to make sure that she shoots the shot Jihyo’s been pestering her about, but fuck it, it all crumbled with what she saw. She heard Mina calling after her but she pretended to have a phone call as she sprinted out of the room.
Why is the universe so harsh to me? Can somebody die from heartbreak? I swear my chest’s been hurting for so long now.
She remembered the past two years. She was a lot braver when she was a college student, she was ready to tell Mina her feelings but then… but then! Mina’s ex-girlfriend had to spend vacation in Korea and Mina had been busy the entire two months entertaining and touring the girl. Nayeon’s entire momentum had pulled back.
When they were about to graduate, leveraging the heightened feelings due to them starting their adult life then, she was sure she was ready to take her shot. But then, she found Jaehyun giving Mina a whole ‘if you date me i will give u the whole world’ flower petals confession scene in the gymnasium. Mina dated him for a total of two months after that.
(Nayeon will refuse to note that she met Mina’s eyes while Jaehyun was waiting for the latter’s answer, but Nayeon had never turned so quickly her entire life that she missed the light snapping out from Mina’s eyes as she continued to march away from her.)
Leaving the pasta she cooked herself with Chaeyoung, she approached Sana and Jeongyeon and told them that she just went to drop some food. Jihyo’s been prodding her what’s the emergency, but all she can say as a reason is “just because”.
She’s tired of holding out.
Mina looked so smiley with that Jinsoul girl (why does the girl have to be so pretty!), and she’s not gonna rain on their parade with her negative energy.
Well, Nayeon being Nayeon, knew that she told her friends she would only be there for a few, but she can’t deny that the moscato Jihyo opened tasted so good, sweetly soothing the ache in her chest as she gulped a few more glasses.
“You can’t drive after those glasses, Nayeon.” Jihyo said.
Nayeon took another one. “I don’t plan to. I came here by foot, you know. Almost planned to stay the night. But the universe said no,” she quietly, bitterly chuckled.
The universe decided to play a bit more with Nayeon because the next moment, Mina’s beside her, holding her wrist down. “That’s too much in a row, Nayeonie. Slow down?”
The girl was so close Nayeon swore she could cry with how she smelled. She missed being this close to Mina. Yes, the younger girl never forgets to drop by their shop every weekend, and they make sure to meet up during the week to hang out a bit, but the past few months hasn’t allowed Nayeon to be alone alone with Mina.
‘You’re my partner in crime from now on.’
Nayeon seemed so lost in her own dark space, Mina’s words which seemed to comfort her in the past pricks her gut at the moment. There’s a bitter, dark air around her. “And that’s all I will ever be.”
Mina, with a wondering face, asked. “You… what?”
Mina was so close, and Jinsoul was just at the other side of the room probably eating the pasta Nayeon cooked for the group, and at this distance it was so, so easy to kiss Mina because Nayeon’s tired of feeling the needles in her chest and she felt like Mina’s lips were the healing.
However, when she felt Mina’s hands leave her wrist, she was pulled back to the earth.
Again, she was tired of holding out.
So, Nayeon stood up. Didn’t care whether it came harsh on Mina or Jihyo, but she was going to say this for once and leave; this is one of her main agenda either way (just delivered differently); hopes that she does not see Mina after this because she was going to be honest for once and it’s with alcohol in her system, it’s not gonna come out good. Definitely not good. She wanted it out if her chest but at the back of her head, she’s already preparing her heart as a counted casualty.
She faced Mina, wasn’t able to control a bitter smile.
I am so miserable. I hate this. I'm going to explode. God help me please.
She sighed deeply. “I’m just so tired. Of waiting for you. The universe never gives me my chance," Nayeon dryly chuckled. "Someone’s always ahead of me.”
She didn’t storm off after that. Instead, she slowly reached for her bag, the noise around her being drowned out by every step; made sure not to trip on anything because she remembered she chugged down a bottle and kissing the floor isn’t an ideal exit scene after she dropped that bomb on Mina.
(Mina was too stunned to move or even speak, but thank God for Jihyo who shook her back to her senses.
The japanese girl look around before asking Jihyo, who, luckily, was the only one who was there in the bubble. "Do you mind if I step out for a while? I need to... I need to go to her."
Jihyo smiled like a proud mother. "No, not at all. You guys need to talk. It's been long overdue.")
Between the two of them, Mina's always been the more athletic one. Nayeon hates exercising at most times, especially running. Mina has ran a lot of marathons and laps, but she has never ran with her heart throbbing as badly as now.
She is not going to slow down any second.
Nayeon felt proud, it's just a few minutes of walk from Sana's to her house and she didn't cry not trip during the walk home. She walked as fast as she can even though she can feel the alcohol effects, but she just wants to get home as fast as she can so she can finally cry her heart out while hugging her favorite bunny plushie.
Just as she was about to open the door, she heard footsteps approaching her and she immediately whipped around to face the person. If I'm gonna be stabbed tonight I better know what my perpetrator looks like so I could take revenge.
To her surprise, she was literally assaulted by a body who came snuggling to her neck as soon as they collided, and scents of cherry mixed with jasmine filled her senses. She knew just one person who would wear that combination, and that person is currently heaving, probably from running.
Running?
"God, you walk so fast I almost thought you got lost somewhere." Mina was speaking while latched onto Nayeon, pressing their bodies together and making sure there's not an inch separating them from each other.
Nayeon's head is still buzzed with alcohol, the scent, and the tightness of this embrace. How long has she been imagining this?
"If this is the moscato's doing, I swear to God I'm going to drown myself in a barrel of it tomorrow," the older girl said as she stood there so stiffly, thinking that Mina being there might be too good to be true. A dream. Or just a hallucination.
"I'm here," Mina tightened her hold more, if ever that's possible. She shifted a bit to face Nayeon, who was still unmoving, still unbelieving. She chuckled a bit looking at Nayeon.
"W-why --"
Mina held her cheeks, looking straight into her eyes. "Do you like me, Nayeon?"
Nayeon gulped. Her imaginations have already taken them further down this scene, and she blames her brain for skipping this kind of imagine. Mina's looking at her, eyes burning, and her heart is currently screaming. Mina continued to wait for her, fondling her cheeks and her sight never leaving Nayeon's eyes.
"Because I like you. And I'm sorry if I took too long. I was just waiting," and Mina chuckled shyly. "I didn't know we're both just waiting. I am sorry."
Nayeon can't seem to stop gulping. As much as she's feeling a lot like heaven at the moment, her mind reminded her of Jinsoul.
So, with the remaining sobriety she has, she detached herself from Mina. "Like you?" She felt physical pain while doing that, but she's holding onto that sober part of herself before she gives in to the euphoria that is Mina liking her back. "What do you mean 'do I like you'? Mina, I've been in love with you since our junior year in college."
Mina gasped, but it didn't take long for her to reach for Nayeon again, Nayeon's confession is ringing in her ear and she has never felt so exhilirated hearing that from her. However, Nayeon stepped back. Every inch Nayeon stepped back, she felt like she was starting to suffocate. What is it this time? Did she get so tired of waiting?
"Jinsoul... Mina. You have Jinsoul now." There were unshed tears in Nayeon's eyes, and one more minute she stays like this with Mina, she's sure she would crumble right there. The older girl looked tiny keeping her fists together to herself, as if preventing herself from touching Mina, from indulging her longing all these years.
Nayeon never thought Mina would smile in this situation. The japanese girl was grinning so big her eyes were just curves now.
Mina reached for her again, for the nth time. This time, making sure that Nayeon does not escape. The older was getting more and more dizzy from all that has happened in the span of two minutes, but she felt like losing it when she felt a pair of lips land on her. It wasn't soft - it was more persistent, like the feeling of 'finally!' put in a kiss.
Nayeon tried to open her eyes after a few seconds, she really tried. But all she can focus on is Mina's lips, which are now smiling again, teeth bared as well. "Jinsoul's my cousin's girlfriend. It was nice knowing that being her buddy for a few days would actually lead us to this. I mean, her presence helped, didn't it? Because I almost conspired with Sana already to make you jealous and see if you have feelings for me too... Didn't know Jinsoul being here would do it."
Her head's really heavy now, but her heart is light. Nayeon hoped that she won't wake up tomorrow and learn that this was all just a dream, so she maximizes the moment if ever this was really just hallucination.
"Stop being everyone's buddy. It hurts here," Nayeon points to her chest, "when you're close with somebody else. Be my forever buddy instead, no one else's." Nayeon’s voice is too soft and shy it wanted to make Mina cry.
Mina kissed her again. This time, lighter - so soft it felt like kissing the warmest clouds. "I told you you were my partner in crime from then on, remember? I meant it, Nayeon. You and I."
Nayeon didn't know how she got inside her room, but she's thankful to the universe for not letting her kiss the floor. So far, even with eyes closed, she didn't feel anything painful in her face (an indication that she really didn't kiss the floor due to inebriety). She moved around a little and she was met with a warm skin, scent wafting even with her comforter all over her face.
Mina moved a bit closer to Nayeon just as the latter peeked from the blankets. She pulled Nayeon to her neck, covering the latter's eyes from the assault of morning sunlight.
"Sleep more, big baby."
Nayeon took a deep breath, breathing in Mina's smell. "I am not dreaming. This is real. You are here. And you like me too."
Mina chuckled, her voice still hoarse. Nayeon wants it every morning.
"Yes, I like you so much, and I'm in love with you too, that we need to talk about us later. For now, more sleep? I want to cuddle more. It's still early. Plus, you owe me years worth of cuddles."
Nayeon never felt her heart so light before this.
"Whatever you want, baby."
She would need to thank Jihyo after this. She might have shoot her shot differently, but she still won the prize.