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It was a well established fact that Katsuki hated mess; despite his many character flaws, he was very tidy, which - according to everyone currently living in the UA dorm rooms - was his one redeeming feature as a roommate. Yes, he was grouchy, refused to participate in team-building activities and went to bed obnoxiously early, but everyone agreed that putting on with his weird personality quirks was an easy enough tradeoff to make for a tidy common room and clean kitchen.
He would grumble endlessly about how everyone else couldn't clean for shit - which was only natural for a pack of overgrown kids living outside of their family home for the very first time - but that only meant he had to take matters into his own hands to ensure the kitchen and living room were tidy enough to keep them as liveable spaces.
In a way, Katsuki knew that his endless complaining about it was mostly to do with his expansive personality and desire to make trouble. In general, the mess wasn't too bad, perhaps because everyone knew it was best to keep on Bakugo’s good side than risk having to fight him.
The one notable exception was whenever anyone decided to try and cook anything more involved than boiled rice and steamed veggies, because then... well, then the kitchen became an absolute bombsite and Katsuki could feel his blood pressure spike, fury clouding his vision at the mere thought of any of those dumbarses burning pans black and caking the worktops with messy goo that had since solidified and would be a pain to clean.
And that was exactly what Katsuki came to face as soon as he came back to the dorms after an incredibly dull shift on patrol.
"What the fuck happened to my kitchen?" he howled out into the seemingly empty corridors “I’m gonna fucking skin you and use your shitty hides to mop this fucking mess up.”
He wasn’t really expecting an answer, just wanting to make his displeasure known and make everyone that could hear aware that there would be hell to pay soon. Because of this, he was surprised to hear footsteps hurrying down the stairs once he was done yelling.
"You're back early, Kacchan..." Izuku said, peeking out of the stairwell and making his way to the kitchen with him.
"The fuck's that meant to mean?" he grumbled, already busying himself with shifting batter-covered bowls and utensils into the sink to try and make sense of the mess left behind. "What the fuck did you do?"
"We made a cake. Kinda. Mina saw this recipe on Tiktok and it looked so tasty, a-"
"And burned down the kitchen?" he interrupted.
"Well, we had to make caramel. And melt marshmallows. And chocolate. It's hard, and it didn't really work out."
Katsuki grumbled at the thought of cleaning up burnt caramel out of a pan.
“Why didn’t you make Sugar Fingers help you?”
“We wanted to make it ourselves! Sato is too good a cook and we wanted to learn,” Izuku explained as Katsuki gathered all the dirty bowls and utensils and piled them up to be cleaned, with nothing but aggressive clattering of hard plastic against metal filling the kitchen. "We're going to wash it all up in the morning, Kacchan... you don't have to."
"It will be even more disgusting in the morning, moron," he grumbled, taking a second to take in the amount of mess waiting to be cleaned. "It has to be now."
Without a word, Izuku joined in to the cleaning up operation, starting to wipe down the countertops and scrub out whatever solidified grime was left behind while Katsuki started washing up the many dishes they had somehow managed to dirty.
They worked together in silence for a while, until Izuku’s talkative nature made him feel the need to chit chat.
"How was patrol tonight?" Izuku eventually asked, sitting on the newly-clean worktop.
"Dull as fuck," Katsuki said, still hard at work with the washing up.
"That's a good thing, though,” he pointed out. “No crime, no one getting traumatised, that sort of thing.”
"Yeah, whatever. But that shit won't raise my ranking."
"You don't have a licence yet, Kacchan. We aren’t in any rankings yet."
"But we will in two months. And then I’m gonna race for number one. And you'll go fuck yourself."
Izuku laughed openly at the statement, tipping his head back in delight before shaking his head with a fond smile remaining.
"You don't have to be so aggressive all the time, you know,” he told him.
"And you didn't have to cover every single kitchen item the school owns in sticky batter, did you? Yet here we are," Katsuki quipped back with a smirk. “Some shit about the choices we make, or whatever.”
Izuku sighed, jumping off the worktop and making his way just behind Katsuki to rest his hands on his hips.
"Why do you have to be like that?" he asked, his face pressed against Katsuki’s shoulder.
"I am how I am, nerd." he said with a smirk on his lips, pressing back into the gentle attention and prompting Izuku to wrap his arms around him while he continued to pretend to be engrossed in the art of washing up a blackened saucepan.
"Yeah, but you've got to learn to be nice too, Kacchan."
"What if I'm not?"
"Then you won't be number one. No one wants a big meanie as the number one hero," Izuku taunted, squeezing him in his arms to prevent Katsuki from turning in his arms, which was exactly what the blond was trying to do.
"Now you are the one being an arsehole."
"I'm so not!" Izuku said, sneaking his hand up under Katsuki's shirt, tracing the light trail of hair peeking over the edge of his boxers and up towards his belly button. "See? I'm being extra nice, Kacchan."
"Fuck off," Katsuki grumbled, well aware that he was putty in his hands and would never be able to resist his boyfriend's touch.
Izuku laughed, making Katsuki aware that he wasn't planning to go anywhere, and rather, was keen on pushing forward.
By then, Katsuki had long stopped pretending that he could continue to wash up, simply resting his hands against the edge of the sink and letting him touch his body. He closed his eyes, zoning in on the hand that was currently tracing his abs and sending shivers down his spine. It was only when Izuku's crooked fingers started undoing his jeans that the reality of where things were headed flooded his mind.
"We're in the kitchen, freak," Katsuki complained in a breathy whisper, feeling him palm him through his boxers.
"So?" he asked, a grin palpable in his voice."We can clean up, can't we?"
Those words were more than enough to have Katsuki no longer attempting to restrain himself, his hand immediately moving to unzip his jeans without a single word. Izuku laughed quietly, pressing a new kiss to Katsuki's shoulder before sneaking his hand past the waistband of his boxers, fingers trailing over soft pubic hair on their way downwards.
A soft sigh escaped Katsuki as he felt his boyfriend's hand on him; he wasn't in the habit of getting hard in public spaces, but the soft caresses paired with the kisses down the side of his neck, and the strong arm wrapped around his middle, were enough to get him there quite quickly.
The thrill of knowing anyone could walk out of their rooms and find them there was enough to make the encounter even wilder in Katsuki’s mind, leaving him panting and bucking his hips against every single stroke and caress of the hand that had now wrapped itself around his erection and was steadily stroking him into madness.
"You're so pretty like this, Kacchan" Izuku whispered in his ear, his words adding to the fire building in Katsuki’s belly, making him bite down onto his own lips.
Katsuki didn't know if he wanted to complain about being called pretty while he was fucking his hand or demand to be praised more. What he did know was that he didn't trust himself to form words without moaning out, so he remained quiet, simply panting and bucking into his boyfriend's hand.
It didn't take long for Katsuki to finish like that, coming with a hitch in his breath and a quiet groan before relaxing back against Izuku. He took a moment to close his eyes and catch his breath, enjoying a moment of bliss after what they had just done.
"Told you, I'm nice," Izuku whispered, kissing along his jawline.
"You're a pervert, that's what you are," Katsuki retorted with a lazy smirk, still pacified from the rush of endorphins but slowly going back to his normal self.
“Pervert, me?” Izuku asked theatrically. “I am not the one that just creamed his pants… how am I the pervert here?”
A groan escaped Katsuki as his brain rebooted; Izuku wasn’t the kind to say dirty things to him, so having him point out what they had just done (and the fact that he needed to shower and change clothes as soon as possible) was enough to startle him into a flushed silence for a moment.
"Fuck you," he said as soon as he regained his ability to speak. “It’s your fault any of that happened! It’s you who’s the pervert!”
Izuku laughed out loud. "Flustered Kacchan is my favourite type of Kacchan."
"Fuck you," he repeated, washing his hands and folding his arms across his chest. "At least the kitchen's clean now."
"Of course. Mission accomplished~"
Katsuki didn’t respond to his boyfriend’s dumb taunting, looking around the kitchen to make sure that everything was clean enough to satisfy his standards. Once he decided it was, he took a second to stretch his arms up, making his shoulders pop before looking at Izuku and motioning for him to follow him.
"What did you extras bake, anyway?" Katsuki asked, starting to make their way back to his room together, holding hands.
“Well, it was meant to be a caramel unicorn rainbow cake, but it didn’t really work.”
Katsuki decided he did not need or want to know what exactly a caramel unicorn rainbow cake was, the combination of those words alone made his teeth hurt, so there was no chance he would want to ever try it.
“Why didn’t it work?”
“We’re not sure. It got all burnt on the edges but was still liquid-y in the middle. And you know how cakes are meant to rise and get squishy? This one didn’t,” Izuku explained.
“You fuckheads are meant to be saving lives soon and cannot even read a recipe.”
“Hey! We’re like 90% sure the recipe was wrong!” Izuku defended. “Or maybe we forgot to put something in. Kaminari was in charge of the eggs, maybe it was the eggs.”
"Bunch of idiots," Katsuki grumbled, giving his hand a little squeeze as they finally made it up to his dorm room.
“I bet next time we’ll get it right, though,” Izuku argued.
“You better organise that shit soon, ‘cause you’re banned from hosting baking parties once we leave UA.”
The simple mention of moving out in just a handful of weeks, into their very own ratty flat they had already found and signed a lease for, was enough to make Katsuki’s heart skip even if he didn’t show it.
“But Kacchan! It was so much fun!” Izuku argued just for the sake of arguing, and Katsuki knew it.
“None of that burnt caramel shit in my kitchen.”
“What about handjobs while you wash up?”
Katsuki felt a flush creep all over his face when Izuku said that in such a nonchalant way - when had his dumb nerd gotten so confident around sex?
"Fuck you."
"In the kitchen? I mean, we can once we move out…" Izuku said with a laugh.
"I fucking hate you."
"You don't."
Katsuki sighed and grumbled, leaving Izuku alone in his room so he could go change his clothes and clean himself up away from the idiot he had chosen to love.