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“So why are we going into the woods again?” Yibo asked quizzically. “We don’t even have an ax.”
“Do I really seem the type to cut down a tree for Christmas?” Xiao Zhan replied calmly, raising an eyebrow, and Yibo shrugged, ceding the point as the two men continued to walk through the snowy woods.
“Maybe if it was to help clear the forest path for natural growth or something like that,” Yibo grumbled under his breath, and Xiao Zhan nodded, laughing.
“Yeah, that does sound like me,” Xiao Zhan admitted.
Yibo watched him fondly as they continued to walk. It was a nice winter day, one of the few December days full of sunshine, though it was quickly setting in the early afternoon. He stumbled over a hidden tree root, and his boyfriend grabbed him just in time to keep him from face planting. The snow might be soft, but the frozen forest ground underneath it was hard and wouldn’t be very forgiving.
“Are you going to tell me what we’re doing yet?” Yibo asked petulantly, but Xiao Zhan just kept walking, carrying his bags in both hands as Yibo followed behind him, laden with more sacks. That morning, he’d woken up to an amazing smell (Xiao Zhan’s cooking was second to none in Yibo’s opinion) and over breakfast, Yibo had been informed that there was a “surprise” planned for that afternoon. It was their one year anniversary, and Yibo was excited to see what Xiao Zhan had in mind.
There have been so many amazing memories with Xiao Zhan, from hikes to farmer’s markets to urban exploring, and Yibo enjoyed getting to see the Seattle area through Xiao Zhan’s eyes, more traipsing through nature and less being trapped in traffic.
One ferry ride and one bus ride later, he was trudging through the forest, and his stomach was rumbling. “Are we going to dinner somewhere?” Yibo asked. It was starting to get dim and he hadn’t eaten lunch with their late breakfast.
“There’ll be food soon,” Xiao Zhan assured him, his eyes bright as he spotted something ahead. “Oh, there it is, come on!”
Yibo saw lights up ahead, but he wasn’t prepared for the scene that awaited him. It was like an image straight out of a storybook. The forest was full of lights and colorful paper decorations, with a candlelit meal set up on a long wooden table that appeared to rise straight out of the ground.
“What’s this?” Yibo asked with wide eyes. He waved to Meng Ziyi, Xiao Zhan’s business partner (the distinction had been important when Yibo and Xiao Zhan first met.) She was sitting with her girlfriend further down the table. There were about a dozen people there, and Xiao Zhan beckoned Yibo over to a bare area further down, starting to unpack his bag. He pulled out a variety of dishes, setting them out one at a time, but leaving them covered.
“The dinner will start in about a half hour,” Xiao Zhan informed Yibo after checking his watch. “Let’s go decorate and then come back.” He led Yibo further into the forest, and Yibo examined the various trees as they passed. Each pine had different lights and decorations, all in a very particular style. There were about 15 trees decorated along the way, and Xiao Zhan picked a medium-sized fir standing off to the side.
“This one looks like it could use some love,” Xiao Zhan beamed, waving for Yibo to get closer. He grabbed one of the bags that Yibo had lugged along, unpacking battery-powered lights and more decorations.
“Did you make these, Zhan-ge?” Yibo asked, eying the decorated ornament in Xiao Zhan’s hand, which appeared to consist of glittering bird seed.
“I did!” Xiao Zhan looked proud of himself. “This year I made it all out of edible ingredients. All bird-friendly, all natural. We’ll want to take the lights with us, but the rest of the ornaments can stay.”
“These are amazing, Zhan-ge!” Yibo enthused, holding up one of the ornaments close. The detailed work was incredible, and it looked both natural and clean, something that would be very popular in the different artisanal craft fairs that the two men frequented.
Xiao Zhan proved his thoughts correct. “I’m going to try selling them at the night market this weekend!” It took everything in Yibo not to just grab him right there and kiss him breathless. His creativity was so attractive and Yibo loved seeing Xiao Zhan get so excited with his ideas.
“I can’t wait. So what is this?” Yibo asked, grabbing some of the ornaments offered in Xiao Zhan’s outstretched hands and beginning to place them on the branches of the tree.
“It’s a winter solstice dinner that some of us do every year,” Xiao Zhan replied, stringing up the lights while Yibo continued to hang the ornaments. “We all bring something to contribute and decorate the forest. We always try to bring someone new with us. This year, I thought I’d bring you!”
Yibo couldn’t help himself and pulled Xiao Zhan close, needing to share his feelings with action when he felt too overwhelmed for words. Xiao Zhan relaxed against him, the two men kissing soft and slow in the silence of the forest.
“It’s nice out here,” Yibo said softly into the quiet winter day, and Xiao Zhan nodded.
“Sometimes I think I want to live somewhere like this,” he admitted. “The silence can be so calming, where all you hear is your breath. The fresh air, the crack of the wood under your feet as you walk…”
“It sounds lonely to me,” Yibo said with a frown. He hung up another ornament, eying Xiao Zhan out of the corner of his eye.
“I did it once for an art fellowship to give it a try,” Xiao Zhan commented, finishing the lighting and turning it on. The red and green lights alternated smoothly into each other, morphing instead of flashing, and both of the men stood back a moment to admire it.
“Did you like it?” Yibo asked hesitantly, hanging a birdseed star. “Being all alone?”
“For a few nights, but not for long,” Xiao Zhan said with a small laugh. “You’re right, it did get lonely.”
“Maybe with the right company it wouldn’t be so bad,” Yibo ventured, glancing over at Xiao Zhan from under his lashes.
“With the right company,” Xiao Zhan agreed nonchalantly. “Hand me an ornament.”
The younger man tossed him one. Xiao Zhan admired it before placing it on the tree, watching Yibo put the final one carefully in place.
“It looks nice,” Yibo said thoughtfully, and Xiao Zhan smiled, throwing an arm around him.
“I think so too,” he said. “Let’s go join the rest back at the solstice dinner.”
“Can we wait here for a moment?” Yibo asked Xiao Zhan, wrapping an arm around his waist and pulling him close as they stared up at the lit tree.
Xiao Zhan nodded and the two men relaxed into the silence of the falling night sky, their tree changing from red to green to back again. They began to make their way back, taking their time to inspect the variety of other decorated trees in this strange area of the forest. Strains of music wafted through the air from back at the community dinner, and Xiao Zhan started singing along.
Winter spreads her blanket down
White and flawless on the ground
The flowers can't be seen
But you're my evergreen
“I love you, you know,” Xiao Zhan said suddenly, rather than moving to the next verse.
“Mn, you’ve said once or twice,” Yibo replied, pressing a kiss against his neck. “I love you too, Zhan-ge.”
“I did get that impression,” Xiao Zhan nodded, swooping down to capture Yibo’s lips with his own. The kiss was relaxed and full of joy, and Yibo thought once more how lucky he was to have met Xiao Zhan last year.
As the two men made their way back to the table in the meadow, the tea lights spread along the length of the dark wood looked like stars scattered in the field. It was a beautiful night to add to Yibo’s collection of memories, and as he sang along with Xiao Zhan, hearing the chatter of their friends starting to serve dinner, he looked forward to tonight and to what the next year would bring. He was ready for all of it, with Xiao Zhan by his side.
The one I love is constant, though
Seasons come and seasons go