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Viktor was starting to think that perhaps he should stop sticking his tongue in Jayce Talis’s mouth.
It’s not that he wasn’t enjoying having his tongue in Jayce Talis’s mouth- actually, that was kind of the problem. The problem was that Jayce Talis had a very nice mouth, and very nice lips, and hands that sat perfectly and respectfully on Viktor’s hips, careful, appropriate. Big hands. Calloused, big, warm. hands.
He needed to stop thinking about Jayce Talis’s hands, too, but first he needed to stop thinking about Jayce Talis’s mouth, needed to stop acting on his completely insane impulses to do something about the fact that Jayce Talis had a nice mouth, to stop slotting his mouth against Jayce Talis’s, need to stop- kissing him. He really needed to stop kissing him.
He should probably make Jayce stop kissing him too- that, academically, was the next step in the process of ending this little problem. However, that one was a little more complicated, and additionally, beyond his self control.
How had he gotten to this point?
Right, of course, the experiment. The first plant that’d held without rotting instantly- not long, but. Longer. Progress. Jayce had been so excited, so beautiful and so absolutely full of life, and he’d turned to Viktor, and Viktor had just. kissed him.
He’d frozen.
He’d frozen, and so Viktor had pulled back, and he had begun to explain.
Well, explain may be putting it generously. Perhaps a more accurate term is “lied”. He had lied. Enthusiastically, and at length. About Zaun expressions of joy. And then tacked on that it was also an informal greeting. At the end. Because apparently, even at rock bottom, he could always find a lantern and a pickaxe to dig deeper.
Jayce Talis was not stupid. However.
The problem, Viktor reflected, was that despite the fact that Jayce wasn’t stupid, Jayce was trusting. Both trusting and deeply aware of his own ignorance the way a scientist ought to be. And of course. Jayce knew nothing about Zaun. Viktor was the expert. And so he deferred to Viktor’s judgement, and he let Viktor kiss him. Often.
He was starting to really push the limits of what could be defined as an excuse to be enthusiastic. He kissed Jayce when Jayce got the temperature of his tea right, he kissed Jayce when the results of an experiment were statistically significant, he kissed Jayce in Caitlyn’s garden on his birthday because they’d had a surprise party for him and he’d looked so happy.
Once, when their additional equipment request had gone through after Jayce’s lobbying efforts, Viktor had pushed him against the lab counter and kissed him until they’d heard footsteps in the hall and had to spring apart, and he’d mumbled something about Pilties not understanding Zaun customs that Jayce had only had time to make an affirmative noise to before a courier had come in with a summons.
Jayce kissed him too, but it was gentler. Viktor got the soft and horrible impression that Jayce was deferring to his judgement about what situations were appropriate, and wasn’t that so… very Jayce Talis. Damn him.
Jayce kissed him when he came back into a room or when they got a moment alone together, like a greeting belated by other company. Jayce reached for him when Viktor got back from trips to the market or to meet with artificers- he couldn’t leave ALL the politicking to Jayce- and in those moments it was mutual, just like gravity pulling them together, like a familiarity Viktor never thought he’d get to have. And so Viktor was not going to stop making Jayce Talis kiss him. But he really ought to stop kissing Jayce.
This time for sure, he thought. This time for sure he was going to follow through. Jayce was out right now- another council meeting. When he got back, he would simply-
The door opens, derailing Viktor’s train of thought, and he sets it back on the shelf like an earmarked book he’s sure he’s going to read several more times, as many times as it took to stick, and then Jayce’s arms are wrapping around his shoulders from behind him.
Viktor leans his head back, and Jayce is already leaning down, and it’s awkward and strange to kiss him upside down but the brief contact makes Viktor’s stomach flood with warmth anyway.
Jayce is looking at him, soft, a look he’d gotten more and more lately, and Viktor tried not to think too much about, and then his lips quirk up.
Viktor arcs an eyebrow, because that. That look usually spells trouble.
Jayce is not pulling away the way he normally would, his hands are still settled on Viktor’s shoulders.
“So.” He says. “I had a fascinating conversation today.”
“Tell me who it was with, before i decide if I want to hear you summarize it.” Viktor says, dryly.
“Sheriff Marcus.”
“I’ve lost interest.”
Jayce pulls back, but before Viktor can mourn the lack of contact he turns Viktor’s chair around, gently pushing it back against the counter. Viktor raises a single eyebrow at him, the way he does when Jayce does something he’d smack anyone else for, but for once, Jayce looks undeterred.
“No, I think you’re going to want to hear this one.” He says. “We had a class.”
“I don’t think i’d want to attend any class Sheriff Marcus taught, considering I more than did my time learning from Heimerdinger.”
“About Zaun.”
That gives Viktor pause, and something in his expression must tip Jayce off that he’s starting to feel cornered, because Jayce takes a step back, giving him space to get up and get away, and he’s folding his hands behind his back the way he does when he wants to stop from fidgeting or reaching out, and damn him.
He sighs.
“You don’t have to do that.”
“I-”
“Come here.”
Jayce drops to his knees, and before Viktor can fully process that, fully process the fact that Jayce has just moved into his space low and careful to avoid crowding him, and seriously? this? but that’s Jayce Talis. He wants to have a conversation at eye level. Damn him.
“Why did you lie?” Jayce asks, and that’s– not the statement he was expecting. Viktor gives him a slightly flat really look, because. Really.
“As much as I appreciate your humility, you can’t possibly be at a loss for why someone would want to invent reasons to kiss y–”
He doesn’t get the rest of the statement out, because Jayce is kissing him.
And they’ve done this a hundred times before- over a hundred, probably, Viktor’s been greedy, but apparently he gets to be, because Jayce Talis is kissing him.
“I knew.” he murmurs, as he pulls back.
Viktor blinks at him, still reeling from the kiss. “You what?”
“I knew.” Jayce repeats. “-That you wanted to. Not that you lied, but I know you wouldn’t have kissed me if you didn’t want to.”
“–so all along–”
“At least since the birthday party.” Jayce says, and Viktor loves and hates that he sounds so sure, almost casual. “You pulled me outside.”
“Why didn’t you say anything?”
“–I guess I thought you weren’t ready.” Jayce says, sheepishly. “But I thought word might get back to you that I attended the cultural meeting and you’d figure out I knew and think I didn’t want to tell you and then–”
Viktor kisses him, just to shut him up, keeps his hands tangled in Jayce’s hair as he pulls away.
“That is the– stupidest. Sweetest thing i have ever heard.”
“I love you.” Jayce says.
Viktor gapes at him, and then as Jayce’s expression starts to register actual fear, he manages-
“Barring that. You’ve set a new bar.”
Jayce snorts, once, a little clipped; Viktor kisses him again, a reassurance.
“You should have said something.” he murmurs.
“I was-”
“Scared. I know. I can see it now. I should have seen it before.”
“–Viktor.”
“Right.” Viktor says, processing the little twist in Jayce’s tone. “I love you too. I forgot you need to hear it back and I can’t just make it obvious. I love you, Jayce Talis.”
And as Jayce leans in again, Viktor decides- maybe he’d just never stop kissing Jayce Talis. That seemed like the better plan.