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It was the day of the launch party for
Jongin’s KAIxFenty collab. The collaboration was years in the making. All those hours sifting through color swatches and coming up with clever product names finally paid off. Jongin felt confident with highlighter and glitter adorning his face. His face was beaten up for the gods by Rihanna’s own makeup artist, Priscilla Ono. He was feeling himself. He knew he looked good.
He was walking down the red carpet, posing with the palettes, and giving interviews when suddenly the reporters’ attention was being shifted to the appearance of a smaller figure. Jongin didn’t need to get a full look at the person to know who it was. It was his on and off again boyfriend of ten years. Right now, they were off. The man was smiling and waving to the cameras. No one was expecting his appearance. Especially not Jongin.
“D.O.! D.O.! Over here! Care to say a few words to your fellow member?”
A lucky reporter was chosen at random. “Only that I’m so proud of him.”
Inside the party, they were too busy talking to other guests to interact with each other. Jongin was dancing in the middle of the crowd when he locked eyes with Kyungsoo who was marveling at the products on display. He gave a slight head nod. Jongin turned back and pretended not to see. He didn’t know how to reciprocate the greeting.
It had been like this since the beginning of their relationship. Jongin would feel suffocated by their harsh reality and would abandon the relationship only to miss Kyungsoo and run back into his loving arms. Kyungsoo was always patient and never questioned Jongin’s actions because if he could, he’d run away too, but in the opposite direction.
Seeing Kyungsoo stirred up some emotions inside Jongin that he didn’t realize were there. This had been one of their longer breaks. It had been some time since Jongin last spoke or had seen Kyungsoo.
After the party, Jongin ran himself a bath to wind down. He was in the tub when he heard someone punching in the code to his apartment. He wasn’t alarmed by the action. He knew only one other person memorized the number by heart. The password was the anniversary of when they first started dating, after all. An unforgettable day they celebrated even when they were broken up.
Kyungsoo closed the toilet lid and took a seat. Bathrooms had always been an intimate setting for the couple. Some of their earlier hookups were in the restrooms at the SM Entertainment building and their dorms. A majority of the time they’d shower together. Most importantly, Jongin would sit on the edge of the tub while Kyungsoo got ready for work. It was like a morning ritual. They would have silly conversations about anything and everything before Kyungsoo left for the day. But today wasn’t one of those days.
Jongin couldn’t deny that Kyungsoo looked hot as fuck in his suit. He had to resist the urge of pulling him into the tub with him. He knew Kyungsoo wouldn’t have cared. Name brand clothes meant nothing to Kyungsoo.
Kyungsoo took off his blazer and rolled up his sleeves to get more comfortable.
“Did you drink?” Jongin asked without looking at Kyungsoo.
“I had a beer at a restaurant. All they had were embellished cocktails at the party. Not my style.”
“The others said they were too busy to attend. Why’d you go?”
“I wanted to support you,” Kyungsoo said matter of factly.
“Now we’re both in trouble.” Jongin’s manager told him at the party that the staff at SM were furious to find out that Kyungsoo attended the sourée without their approval. Jongin wouldn’t be surprised if they threw him into another dating scandal. They didn’t do the same to Kyungsoo. Never to Kyungsoo. SM knew Kyungsoo would stand his ground and leave the company if they ever made him do that. One of the reasons why he left to the military was because they tried to get him to do something he didn’t want to do. They pressured him to release a solo album, something he refused to do until Jongin released one of his own. That’s just the type of boyfriend Kyungsoo was.
“Do we care?” Kyungsoo said bluntly. It was more of a statement than a question.
Jongin moved to rest his head on the edge of the tub so Kyungsoo could caress his cheek. Kyungsoo accepted the invitation and rubbed circles on Jongin’s cheek with his thumb.
“I suppose not. I hate that we’re confined to only show our love between these walls.”
“It won’t always be like this. I promise.”
“I want to go on dates. I want to travel with you. I want to hold your hand as we walk down the street.” Jongin’s eyes started pooling with tears. “I’m so sorry for making you give up your happiness by falling in love with me.” He looked down and traced the veins on Kyungsoo’s hands that were now on the tub so the man could lean in closer to Jongin.
“You didn’t make me do anything I didn’t already want to do in the first place.”
“Why do you love me?” Jongin’s eyes looked up earnestly.
“Do I need a reason?”
“What do I have that you can’t find in someone else?”
“You have everything I could want and more. To be honest, I don’t know what you see in me. I’m average in comparison to you.”
Jongin smiled. “That’s easy. You have all the Bs. You’re big, beefy, a brunette… you have big, brown eyes, a baby face, a bubble butt, a big dick… Sometimes you have a buzz cut.”
Kyungsoo let out a silent laugh. He removed his hand and looked directly into Jongin’s honey brown eyes.
Jongin got lost in Kyungsoo’s gaze. He snatched the hand right back and placed it on his cheek again, holding it with his own, and closed his eyes. “I wish I never would have met you.”
“You don’t mean that,” Kyungsoo said softly.
Jongin opened his eyes. “Of course I don’t. You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me. I love you,” he whispered.
“I know you do.”
“Why am I like this?”
“Because you’re scared. I know I’m terrified,” Kyungsoo admitted.
“I wish things were easier for us,” Jongin confessed.
“That’s what makes us stronger than other couples.”
“They’re going to keep pulling us apart.”
“We won’t let them win.”
“You’re an angel. I don’t deserve you.”
“That’s not true. And you know it.”
“Will you still love me when I’m no longer young and beautiful?”
Kyungsoo immediately got the reference. “I’ll still love you when you’ve got nothing but your aching soul.”
“I know you will.”
Kyungsoo bent down to give Jongin a tender kiss, the bubbles in the tub now long gone.
“Will you spend the night with me? I don’t want to be alone tonight.” Jongin didn’t mind sounding needy when it came to Kyungsoo.
“Have I ever denied you of anything?”
Jongin snorted. “Yes. On camera.”
“I’m an actor. I’m playing my part as EXO’s D.O., but you know Doh Kyungsoo, the person, would give you the moon and the stars if he could. You have me wrapped around your pretty finger, Kim Jongin.”
“Show me.”
Kyungsoo scooped Jongin out of the tub and kicked open the door across the hall that led into Jongin’s bedroom and laid him down gently on the bed.
Kyungsoo undressed himself before undressing Jongin. He took his time making love to Jongin until Jongin felt like he was melting in Kyungsoo’s arms, kissing him in the all right places and thrusting in ways that made Jongin moan softly. It took no time for him to be out of breath. Jongin clung onto Kyungsoo like a leech.
“Jongin, you’re so beautiful. I wish you could see how gorgeous you look right now. How could I love anyone else when you exist? Heaven must have sent you to me.”
Jongin grabbed Kyungsoo for a deep, frantic kiss. He didn’t just want Kyungsoo. He needed Kyungsoo. Just like he couldn’t physically let go of Kyungsoo in that moment, he couldn’t let him go in his life. Jongin didn’t have to say a word. Kyungsoo already knew his message.
“I know, I know,” Kyungsoo said when they let up for air. “I’m here now. I’ll take care of you. No one is gonna hurt you.” Kyungsoo pressed into Jongin harder and harder, making sure to hit his prostate every time.
“Soo, Soo… Kyungsoo…” Jongin was at the point in the evening where he could only remember to repeat Kyungsoo’s name.
“Come for me, baby.” Ever since the day they first had sex, Kyungsoo made it a habit of letting Jongin come first. Jongin’s pleasure meant more to him than anything. “I know you want to. Don’t hold back. I’m not going anywhere. We’ll do it again if you want to. Just tell me.” Kyungsoo ravished Jongin’s neck and collarbone by nibbling on his skin, not stopping his movements from the waist down.
It’s not like he needed permission, but Jongin loved hearing those reassuring words. He touched himself until the sensation was unbearable. He reached the pinnacle of his orgasm. No one could make him feel as loved as Kyungsoo did.
It didn’t take much longer for Kyungsoo to plant his seed inside Jongin. The two were exasperated, lying down on their backs, staring at the ceiling.
“Thank you, Kyungsoo,” Jongin muttered. “For being so patient with me.”
Kyungsoo turned and gave Jongin a peck on the lips. “It’s nothing. I’d cross miles if it meant I got to see you, Jonginnie.”
Kyungsoo was everything to Jongin. There was no one as handsome as Kyungsoo. There was no one as talented as Kyungsoo. No one spoke like Kyungsoo. No one made love to him like Kyungsoo did. No one made Jongin feel special as Kyungsoo did, as if he was the most ethereal being in the universe. Kyungsoo made Jongin feel more precious than the rarest of diamonds.
“Let’s try this again,” Jongin propositioned.
Kyungsoo agreed. “And again. And again. Until my dying day.”
That night, Jongin fell asleep to Kyungsoo singing “All of Me” by John Legend.
Jongin knew Kyungsoo meant every word. He laid his head on Kyungsoo’s chest and knew there was nowhere else he’d rather be. He’d go everywhere Kyungsoo went. They met by chance. Jongin didn’t even know if Kyungsoo shared the same feelings as he did at the beginning, but fate brought them together. In every lifetime, Jongin would find Kyungsoo and pick him above everyone else. No one could change that. How would they? Their love was indestructible.