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Yoongi was the RA on the fifth floor of the North campus dormitory hall at Draisine University, and he took his responsibilities very seriously. There were twelve rooms packed with bright-faced, devious little freshmen who were down to make every mistake they possibly could in their first year of college life, and it was Yoongi's job to try to save them from themselves, even just a little bit. This semester it seemed the universe had stacked the odds against him- because he'd been saddled with a larger-than-usual number of total hellions. As a junior, Yoongi had the learned experience of how to get through the better part of a four-year stint in this place, and if they'd just listen, he'd be their best resource for learning how to pace themselves... but no. They didn’t. So he had to resort to being a hard-ass, and enforcing the rules and parceling out consequential punishments far too frequently. On this occasion, he's started out his day with another round. Yoongi's prime target was nowhere in sight in the commons area on his floor, but he spotted the miscreant's two best friends and knew the fastest way to get this resolved was to involve them, rather than hunt around on his own.
"Park. Jeon. Where's your partner in crime, huh? He thinks I don't see when he sneaks back into the hall after curfew." Yoongi's voice dropped into a lower octave, with just an edge of exasperated growl tinging his words. "You should know by now- I see everything."
Jimin had the self-preservation to at least look somewhat ashamed. He bit his plush lower lip, and tried to hide behind the thick fringe of glossy peachy-pink hair that curls down over his forehead. He may not be the one currently in trouble, but he also knows that Taehyung got caught sneaking back in this time because he went out to the corner store to buy Jimin some chocolate, even though Jimin said not to do so. Jimin was upset over his latest failed relationship attempt, and Tae was just trying to console him. But he knew that no excuse will float with their hard-ass RA; he has no feelings. Yoongi was nothing but a living embodiment of fun-killing rules.
Jungkook, on the other hand, sat wide-eyed and dumbfounded at the sudden barrage from the elder student. He was passed out asleep last night while Taehyung made his escape, and had only just recently woken up, previously unaware of any transgression. He blinked slowly, and pulled the straw in his box of banana-flavored milk from his lips before speaking.
"I don't know what you mean, Yoongi. I was asleep last night." Jungkook spoke in a low, soft tone, his round brown eyes going almost impossibly larger with an attempt to convey pure innocence. His unruly blonde waves are a barely-constrained riot, half pulled back into a topknot with a tiny coiled plastic band, and the massively oversized black hoodie he's wearing practically dwarfs him in its folds. Yoongi looked at the kid and felt his heart twinge, as if it wanted to just give in, but he'd seen this act before. Yoongi leaned down to bring his face closer to the freshman's soft countenance, and allowed a small, pleasant smile to cross his features. Seeing this, Jungkook's expression morphed from one of softness to the abject fear of a deer caught in approaching headlights. Yoongi's response to this shift in expression was to let his smile spread wider, the cat with the trapped canary clearly enjoying the moment before he snaps and attacks his prey.
"Suuuuure, Jeon... you're never breaking rules on purpose ," said Yoongi, in a low, patronizing whisper. Then the smile disappeared in a flash, and Yoongi's usual stone-faced expression returned so quickly, Jungkook would question later if the smile ever really happened.
"Bullshit. Find Kim and get him to my room in the next five minutes- or you all get the consequences." Yoongi stood back up, turned away from the pair of freshmen, and walked back to his suite at the far end of the hall. Watching him disappear into his rooms and slam the door, Jungkook finally shuddered an exhale of held breath, after which his forehead wrinkled in frustration, his nose scrunched, and he quickly slapped Jimin on the arm before he could scoot out of the way. Jimin flinched back with a shout of pained surprise.
"YAH! What the-?!"
"No- don't you dare act like you didn't deserve that! What did you and Taehyung get up to last night that now all of the sudden I'm in trouble by association!" Jungkook pouted, and went back to drinking his milk box while still glaring at his roommate. Jimin's face crumpled, and his eyes glossed over as tears edged his waterline, threatening to spill. He'd been prone to crying for days now, and as soon as he saw it, Jungkook was full of remorse for having nudged his poor, sweet, heartbroken friend over the edge again. He quickly put down his drink, and reached with both arms to hug his friend close to his chest.
"I'm sorry, Jiminie, I didn't mean to bite your head off. But seriously- what did Tae do this time to draw the attention of the Eternal Buzzkill?"
Jimin sniffed, and swiped quickly at his eyes to dry them with the cuff of his soft, fuzzy blue sweater. "It's all my fault! I had a bad night last night. I found one of the pics of me and Jackson on my phone, and it just sent me back. I was crying, and Tae insisted only a giant KitKat could solve the problem... so he went to the 24-hour market, and got us each one, but he missed curfew coming back."
Jungkook sighed, knowing that if he had been awake, he likely would have agreed with Tae, and now his only regret was that Tae hadn't brought him one as well. Shaking that selfish thought from his head just as quickly as it arose, Jungkook unfolded his long legs from underneath himself and climbed to his feet, tugging Jimin upright along with him after he gained his balance. "Well- now we have to face the music, and hope Tae isn't in too much trouble. Where is he?"
Jimin tipped his head to the side, towards the opposite direction of the dreaded RA's office. "Showers. At least, that's where I last saw him headed."
Jungkook shook his head, and sighed. "Well- let's hope he's done, because if not, he's gonna need to be done- we have 3 minutes left to deliver him to his doom- or join him." Grabbing Jimin's sweater cuff, Jungkook trudged off towards the communal bathrooms, and Jimin gave in and followed, whining quietly about how it wasn't fair as they went.
When they arrived at the entrance to the large shared bathroom and shower space, Jungkook and Jimin both pulled up short to quickly avoid running headlong into another student; tall, wearing loose pants and a long, oversized t-shirt, with a mop of gingery curls being buffed by towel-wrapped hands, still dripping from a recent wash. The two freshmen yelp and shout at the near-collision. In turn, the boy with a towel blocking his vision barked out a sound of surprise, and quickly pulled the cloth from his head, jumping back slightly. Once he saw who he almost barreled through on his way out the door, his face broke into a wide, boxy smile, all teeth, and he opened his arms in an invitation to embrace, toiletries bag swinging from his outstretched forearm.
"Heya- if it isn't my two favorite people in the world! The day is new, I am fresh and clean- and SO hungry! Let's go hit the caf-" he stopped, mid-sentence, as his brain had time to process the long faces of both of his dearest friends.
"Oh no. No, no no no... is it? No way! I was SO careful, and it was only just fifteen minutes! Are you serious?" Taehyung shook his head slowly as he voiced his denials, and Jungkook and Jimin both slowly nodded their own in grim acceptance of the truth that Taehyung would rather avoid. They both took an arm on either side of Taehyung, and began walking him down the hall, away from the warm steam still escaping the shower stalls, and towards his impending punishment. Taehyung didn’t refuse to walk, but he was vocal about his reticence as they crossed the building, whining and complaining as they went.
"Why is he such a hard-ass over the littlest of things? I was making a grand gesture to comfort a friend- doesn't my altruism count for anything? I mean, seriously, in the greater scheme of things, I don't feel this was some kind of massive transgression against the order of the universe! My college record shouldn't be sullied over a couple of freaking candy bars in a time of deep emotional need for a loved one!" As his last sentence was finished, they stopped in front of the door to the Resident Advisor's suite.
Being responsible for a whole floor of other students came with its perks. Instead of living crammed into a small room with multiple other students as roommates, Yoongi had two whole rooms to himself, and a private half-bathroom. The front room was meant to act like an office, a safe space where students could talk to him about private or sensitive matters behind a closed door and away from other residents. His bedroom was his personal space, through a second door to the left off the main entrance.
The trio of freshmen stood at the threshold, and Jungkook took a deep breath, before knocking lightly on the doorframe. They waited a moment, but there was no answer. Glancing at the others with a look of uncertainty, Jimin then reached out to knock on the door itself, with a little more force, but instead of resounding with the impacts, the door swung open ever-so-slightly when touched. It obviously didn't latch when Yoongi went through it earlier, and so they are left standing at the door of the dragon's den, so to speak, unsure whether to enter or wait for a response. Jungkook looked at his watch, and was spurred forward with the realization that they had less than a minute left before they were all in for it. He pushed the door open, and stepped in, pulling Taehyung and then Jimin in with him to stand gathered together on the carpet in the middle of the room.
This was a room they were all particularly familiar with, having been called in repeatedly for various offenses. They're there, and on time, but none of them seemed particularly enthused to call out and draw Yoongi's attention to their presence. As they stood in an uncomfortable moment of silence, Jungkook shifting from foot to foot, and Jimin holding tighter to Taehyung's arm, they heard a soft sound of movement from behind the door of their RA's bedroom, followed by a sniffle, and then a noise that was almost indescribable- it was like a sneeze, but emitted by some kind of bubbly, adorable pastel anime creature. A sharp inhale was quickly followed with an exclamation of "Ahhhh-cheeky-choo!", which spiraled higher in tone to end on a tiny, squeaking high note.
The three freshmen looked at each other with matching expressions of dumbfounded shock, and before they could process what they had just overheard, it happened again, and then a third time, in quick succession. Suddenly, the door between the rooms opened, and Yoongi stepped out, sniffling slightly and wiping his nose with a tissue. He looked up, startled to see his office already full of bodies. Tae, Jimin and Jungkook barely had time to school their expressions before Yoongi could see that they heard what had just happened.
"You found him."
"Uhmm... yeah. They found me. You needed me for something?" Taehyung tried to give the stony-faced advisor a cheeky smile, full of bright-faced optimism.
"Nice try- I don't buy that 'I'm a sweet angel' act from you anymore, Kim. You're demonspawn, through and through, but sooner or later, you'll realize that I'm the Lord of this level of Hell, and you either play by my rules- or you feel the flames."
Taehyung had a moment where he considered sassing back, but the look in Yoongi's eyes made him reconsider. Jimin tugged softly at his shirtsleeve, and Tae swallowed his brattier inclinations.
"Okay, yeah- I went out last night to run to the corner store, and didn't make it back before curfew. I swear it was a serious necessity, though- and I was back at quarter-after! This was a minimal offense, at best- not even misdemeanor-worthy... right?... please?"
Yoongi continued to stare down the freshman, his eyes cold, his face showing nothing but icy disdain. He knew when he had a worm on the hook; so sue him for occasionally enjoying watching it squirm.
"You said it. Out after curfew is out after curfew- you did not have prior permission. You know the rules- you broke them. You get to be in charge of cleaning the hall bathrooms for the next week- and you're on probation for the month. Another broken rule gets you written up and the Dean of your program notified."
All three students cringed at the mention of the bathrooms, and Jimin's eyes went wide and glassy with unshed tears yet again at the mention of being reported. He wrapped himself even tighter around his best friend's arm, and struggled to not cry- tears never helped with Yoongi, no matter how genuine. Jungkook had been silent the entire time, and his expression returned to some level of confused bewilderment as he continued to look at the elder advisor. Head tipping to the side, he finally uttered just one word, almost too quiet to be heard: "Allergic?"
Derailed slightly from his role as arbiter of freshman demise, Yoongi shook his head, and shifted his focus to the blonde. "Huh?" He still maintained an edge of bothered irritation. Tae and Jimin were already shuffling towards the door, and Tae yanked on Jungkook's hoodie, breaking the tension, and causing him to stumble to stay upright and linked with his friends.
"Nevermind, ignore him. Heard you loud and clear, no more humanitarian efforts if they break curfew. Got it." Taehyung nodded to punctuate each point in his statement, all the while pushing Jimin and pulling Jungkook out of the office.
Yoongi glared at them out the door, and then heaved a sigh of consternation."Insufferable idjits..." he muttered, as he considered the problem dealt with, and shifted focus to something more entertaining.
Taehyung said nothing until he had ushered both his roommates into their room, and shut the door firmly behind him. He then turned to release his hold on Jungkook, knowing that the youngest of them was fit to burst with curiosity. He left his other hand with fingers still entwined in Jimin’s grip, knowing his best friend was busy mentally working himself over with guilt. Somewhat predictably- they both began speaking at once.
“Did you hear it? Did I imagine that noise? What.. How…”
“Tae, I’m the worst friend ever, I get it if you never want to speak to me again…”
Tae shook his head briefly, and then used his free hand to place one finger on Jungkook’s mouth, silencing him quickly. He then turned to Jimin with a resolute expression on his face.
“Yah- you are NOT, and I won’t hear any further apologies or self-hate. I made the choice, I’d do it again, this is no big deal. Done?” Jimin hiccupped, and then nodded weakly with a wilted smile.
Turning to his other side, he removed the finger holding Jungkook’s endless questions at bay, and addressed the bigger issue at hand.
“Yes- that noise happened. We all heard it, and I’m just as confused as you are… but apparently, our Dictator RA Nightmare is secretly some kind of chibi fluff-cloud marshmallow monster underneath all that anger-ball armor of his.”
“Are we sure? I mean.. what if it was some kind of anime ringtone on his phone or something?” asked Jimin, his personal crisis over causing Taehyung’s punishment forgotten with the advent of this new mystery. Jungkook shook his head with determination.
“No, I’m sure it was real- he was sniffling, and his nose was red, and he had a damp kleenex. Yoongi really sneezed. But the sound it made… it was so…”
“Cute.” said Taehyung.
“Sweet.” added Jimin.
“…Adorable.” Jungkook finished his sentence, and they all nodded in mutual agreement.
The trio fell into awed silence as the reality of what they’d uncovered settled over their collected consciousness. Taehyung, ever the first to find a path to deviance, broke the momentary stillness.
“No one would ever believe us if we told them. We need proof.”
Jimin made a face, incredulous. “And how are we supposed to make that happen? Turn back time? I keep telling you, Tae- you’re NOT the Korean Child Who Lived. Time-turners and potions don’t exist.”
Taehyung grimaced and stuck his tongue out at his best friend, quickly reaching up and flicking him on the forehead. Jimin squealed in pained outrage, and made to launch onto Taehyung’s chest, but Jungkook stepped between them, putting hands out to restrain them, and keep them focused.
“No, we can’t go back… but people sneeze all the time. We just need to make it happen again… and be prepared this time.” The blond grinned broadly, looking first to Tae, and then back to Jimin, nodding slowly. As his two cohorts caught on to his train of thought, they joined him in conspiratorial nods, and dragged desk chairs to the center of their flat, ready to work out the details of their next insane caper.
Yoongi would never know what hit him, if their plans worked out as they envisioned them.
***Three Days Later ***
Yoongi startled awake from a nap he hadn’t intended to take, as someone pounded loudly on his office door. Instantly grumpy, he shook his head to try to clear out the last cobwebs of sleep. He stood, and rubbed one eye with tired fingers, while running his other hand through the mop of mint-green hair on his head in an attempt to not look like he’d just been passed out on his desk. Being an RA doesn't excuse him from the stresses of homework and class projects with looming deadlines- he just wasn’t allowed to look like the hours of hard work snuck up on him like it did the freshmen on his floor. A second resounding series of knocks had him growling out a frustrated response.
“Give it a rest already- I’m coming!” Yoongi swept his hands down the front of his black button-down shirt with a modicum of frustration; he knew he likely looked rumpled from sleeping, no matter what.
“But I seriously need your help!” came the reply from the other side of the door, and Yoongi was now fully awake with equal levels of concern and mistrust. He knew that voice right away.
“Park, what in the world have you done this time?” Yoongi groaned as he opened the door. He was greeted with the unusual and baffling sight of Jimin standing at his threshold with his hands full of a large metal tin, tipped over amidst a heaping pile of what looked to be ground black pepper cupped between his shaking hands. The petite dancer was balanced half on one foot, having obviously used the other to kick the door instead of knocking more politely.
“What-?!? Do I even want to ask what you were up to this time?”
“I was trying to refill the table shaker we use, and the tin lid broke off and it dumped and my hands are full and I don’t want to waste it all, and Kookie and Tae aren’t back from classes yet… help, please! They’ll never leave me alone if I waste all this, we just bought it.” Jimin’s tone was cycling higher in volume and pitch as his apparent hysteria wound him up. Just as he finished his plea, the door at the end of the hall opened, and conveniently, in walked his two roommates. They paused their walk towards their room to take in the sight of their roommate’s plight, and started laughing uproariously. Taehyung pointed at Jimin, while holding his stomach with the other arm.
“What- Jimin, what did you do? You’re such a total mess!”
Jungkook, beside him, swiftly took out his phone, and turned the camera towards the scene in front of him, as he was wont to do on almost every occasion. He was a film major, after all- and this was priceless, unscripted hilarity… he hoped.
Yoongi tried to calm Jimin as the freshman began to wail in embarrassment, and Tae just continued to rile him up. Before he could step away, Jimin flailed his hands, beginning to toss black pepper everywhere, creating a small, unbreathable dust cloud around himself and the RA both. Jimin coughed and then, much to Yoongi’s disbelief, his cries changed pitch and volume yet again as he inhaled the spice. Yoongi was also unable to escape the fog of pepper-infused air, and his throat and eyes instantly began to burn. He yelped and immediately turned away, spluttering for fresh air as his eyes began to stream tears.
Jungkook and Taehyung both quickly backed away, pulling Jimin with them, who just kept crying his apologies and his pain from the pepper in his own eyes and mouth. The two unharmed conspirators looked at each other briefly, and an unspoken agreement of “Abort!” passed between them. They both joined Jimin in verbalizing a rush of apologies, and promised to clean up the mess once the toxic cloud dissipated. Making a hasty exit, they backed away from the furious, reddening face of their pepper-dosed Resident Advisor.
Later…
“Well, that didn’t work. He didn’t sneeze at all…” muttered Jimin, laying on the floor of their dorm room with a wet hand towel draped over his eyes.
“Of course he didn’t, you silly- we said blow some pepper in his face- not surround him in an impenetrable cloud of the stuff! You overdosed him!” snapped Taehyung in response.
“I’d like to see you manage to only blow a tiny bit of pepper in someone’s face when both your hands are full of the stuff! The stupid tin broke!” whined the boy on the floor.
“Enough, you two- Look, Plan A obviously did not go well. So… we move on to Plan B. Yeah?” spoke Jungkook, calm and focused on their joint goal.
***Two Days Later***
Yoongi had made it a habit to check the hall bathrooms each morning, wanting to confirm that Taehyung was doing his penance and cleaning them thoroughly. He was impressed, to say the least, that the freshman was not slacking in his duties, or trying to pass off a quick swipe with a rag as a decent clean-up job. Those bathrooms seemed to become filthy again almost the instant you finished cleaning them due to the number of bodies using them at all hours of the day and night. It would be easy to try to use that as an excuse for why it never looked completely clean, but Yoongi had a grudging respect for the work Tae was putting in each morning, even though he could never tell him such a thing.
On this morning, he opened the door to see Tae wringing out a sponge in the sink, Jungkook sitting on the waist-high cabinet that separated the sinks from the showers, his ever-present phone in hand, recording his friend as he paid his penance for his transgressions. That Jungkook… he filmed everything. The third chaos kid was nowhere in sight.
When Taehyung heard the door open, he turned towards the door, already speaking: “Can you give me just five more minutes to really get this place clean before you start destroying it aga-…” He stopped mid-sentence when he saw who had walked in. Changing tone and tactics, he spoke a second time.“I’m almost done here, I’m doing it…okay?” He gave a pleading half-smile to the stone-faced elder student as the door swung shut behind him.
“Yeah- whatever. Just get it done and don’t let it make you late to your classes. Same with you, Jeon. It’s not like fresh footage of your buddy cleaning human filth can’t be obtained again tomorrow.” Yoongi grimaced, and shook his head in judgement.
“Oh! Speaking of filth- the smell in here is just SO bad most days, and I had an idea- what if we left canisters of air freshener outside each entrance to the toilets, and asked these barnyard animals to try to keep it from smelling like a sewage treatment site in here? I found this, and it really does a good job of erasing the stench- what do you think?” Before Yoongi could properly react or respond, Taehyung was spraying a dose of deeply floral-scented air freshener right at his face, from just a few feet away. It was close enough that Yoongi actually felt micro-droplets of aerosolized fluids touch his skin, and the sense-numbing stench of chemically-recreated flowers filled his sinuses, his mouth; it was like it had coated his tongue, and he could taste it as if he’d licked a rosebush. Absolutely foul.
Yoongi sputtered and gagged, and then inhaled deeply through his mouth before bellowing in his frustration. “KIM! You’re not supposed to spray that garbage ON people- just lightly in the air! Augh! Do you have no concept of aim, or distance? Eugghhh…”The RA stooped over the nearest sink, turning on the tap and immediately splashing handfuls of cold water over his face, then taking a mouthful to try to rinse the taste from the back of his throat.
Looking abashed, Taehyung tucked the can of air freshener into the bucket of cleaning supplies he’d scurried to gather, and he and Jungkook stepped carefully around Yoongi while his face was buried in the flow of water. They were at the door when Yoongi looked up, soaked, and fixed them both with a gimlet stare. The two freshmen froze, and Jungkook slowly turned off the still-recording video on his phone, and pocketed the device.
“Get. Out. Of. My. Sight.” Yoongi growled.
They did exactly that.
Later…
“Well? Was Plan B a success?” Jimin asked cheerfully as he returned from his afternoon class, and saw his two roommates for the first time since breakfast. His query was met with stony silence, and his shoulders fell with resignation. He dropped his bag by his bedside table, sinking down onto the beanbag cushion in front of their TV. Jimin sighed, and looked up at Taehyung, where he hung over the side of his upper bunk bed, head dangling towards the floor as he stared at the ceiling.
“So… is this where we give up? I mean… it doesn’t feel like a fun joke anymore… does it?”
Jungkook rolled over on his own bunk beneath Tae, no longer facing the wall. “Jimin’s kinda right, Tae. Should we maybe just stop? We’re just making Yoongi hate us more and more…”
Taehyung narrowed his eyes as his glare at the ceiling tiles intensified. He then flipped over, to better direct his piercing gaze at his two roommates. “We can’t give up now. Not just yet. I’ve been thinking, and we’ve narrowed it down… I think I know just how to get what we want, and finally have our perfect evidence of Yoongi’s marshmallow realness.” He looked pointedly into Jimin’s eyes, asking for his agreement without words. Jimin sighed, and nodded. Taehyung then shifted his intense gaze to Jungkook, hanging even further off his bed to seek eye contact with the boy underneath him. Jungkook’s eyes widened, and he bit his lower lip with his oversized, bunny-like upper teeth before nodding once.
“Okay… so here’s Plan C…”
***Three Weeks Later***
The hijinks of the Chaos Trio had seemed to ebb down to a manageable level, and the following weeks had been something resembling almost normal. Yoongi kept a stern eye on Taehyung as he finished his bathroom duties, and after that, it was like the fear of yet another blunder into his scrutiny kept them subdued, which suited Yoongi just fine. Not like there weren’t other students on his floor to keep track of; there were days where lost files on computers, bad test scores and emotional outbursts were about all he could handle dealing with, and it took every bit of bandwidth he had just to keep his own school work from completely falling to pieces. Yoongi missed the more carefree days of his Sophomore year, where he wasn’t scared and brand new, but wasn’t saddled with the responsibility of acting as an elder sibling for a batch of feckless freshmen, either. He knew being an RA was going to be a task- he just didn’t expect it to hit quite so hard sometimes.
The last two days had been taxing- one student had an unexpected death in the family, but couldn’t go home for the services because of project deadlines and tests that couldn’t be skipped. That was rough, as there had been lengthy crying sessions on the overstuffed cushions of the small couch in his office. Yoongi did his best to provide some support in an untenable situation. The stress and grief had weighed heavy on his shoulders, and he’d not slept well, feeling like sometimes his “guidance” was a hollow placeholder for any real, tangible assistance.
Two other students on his floor had decided their deeply passionate and tumultuous love had somehow run its course, or at least hit one hell of a pothole, and screaming, sobbing, and demands to force one or the other to leave the dorm for good were hurled back and forth with no one but Yoongi to calm down the hysterics. He explained the rules, and tried to bring all involved parties back to some sense of peaceable domesticity. The situation resolved itself after he’d gotten them to spend a moment actually listening to each other, after which they went back to their rooms, arms wrapped around one another and whispering tender apologies and exultations of continued adoration. All in all, if Yoongi was honest with himself? It had left him feeling a little like a used and hollow shell, and he worried internally that his brittle senses might cause him to respond poorly to the next freshman crisis that confronted him.
Attempting to find a slice of time for some self-care, Yoongi was sitting on his not-so-big, but passably comfy couch, mug of spiced chai latte at his elbow, and a book that wasn’t on any class syllabus in his lap, waiting to be enjoyed. He adjusted his glasses on the bridge of his nose, took a deep inhale of the spicy-sweet smell of his tea before taking a sip, and then he picked up his book, scanning the page for where he’d left off. It was technically Open Office Hours for him, but as long as he stayed available in case anyone needed him? His time was free while there was no need. He left the door to his room ajar, and let himself sink into the pages of his escape. Yoongi’s attention was quickly wrapped up in the story, and his door being pushed open a fraction more once, then twice, then again totally missed his awareness.
Yoongi’s reverie was broken when he heard a rustling from his desk behind him. As he moved his bookmark to hold his page, and put down his book, something slithered underneath his legs where he had them propped on the low table, caressing his bare skin just below the hem of his oversized black cargo shorts and he jumped, pulling his knees up to bring his legs to his chest with a startled gasp. The rustling behind him happened again, and he saw the curl of a thin, fluffy black-tipped tail disappear around the corner of the couch from where it had tickled the backs of his calves. Swiftly spinning in his seat, he turned to meet the green eyes of a small, cream-colored kitten with ears and muzzle of darker red-brown fur, looking up at him before reaching out one furry paw again to bat a balled-up piece of scrap paper across the surface of Yoongi’s desk. Hearing the distinct sound of tiny claws in fabric, Yoongi spun again the opposite direction and glared down the outside of the arm of the couch, greeting the face of a black and brown striped kitten, yellow eyes looking up at him as it paused in scratching the couch upholstery to stretch it's spine and front legs to unbelievable lengths.
“Yah! Where did you come from- stop that, beastie!” He reached down with one hand to swat lightly at the striped kitten, who released it’s hold on the couch and bounded off through the door into his adjoined bedroom. Yoongi was startled from behind him as the sound of a tin of paperclips fell to the floor, knocked there by the flame-point kitten still playing with the objects on his desk. Turning back to the front so as to stand up and oust his unwanted visitors, Yoongi was halted in his movements as a ball of white and mottled-grey fur jumped up beside him on the couch. Freezing, Yoongi watched helplessly as the long-haired kitten with it’s massive ears, tipped by little tufts of black fur, climbed onto his lap without a single care for an invitation. Yoongi took one deep inhale, and held his breath as the kitten sat on his thighs, big blue guileless eyes staring up at him, as if the kitten was assessing his worthiness. Having made some kind of decision, the kitten stood, and walked the few steps to climb up Yoongi’s torso, stopping again to sit on his chest, just inches from his face.
Yoongi had yet to breathe as he was now practically nose to nose with his most recent room invader, and the hand holding a phone that crept around the edge of the door frame was totally outside his notice. The third kitten was slightly larger than the other two, mostly due to its fur being longer and more luxurious than the others. Snowy white fur surrounded the bright blue orbs of its eyes, and also gave the appearance of uneven white mittens on its front paws, where the banding of black and grey stripes stopped halfway down. The kitten’s tail, which was a masterpiece of fluffiness, was almost as long as the kitten’s whole body, and it swished back and forth lazily, as the kitten just stared deep into Yoongi’s soul.
The hand that was stealthily filming the scene inside the RA’s office was slowly followed by a face with curly bleach-blond hair, which was followed by another with a fall of peachy-pink fringe, and then a mop of ginger curls topped the third spectator, all mostly hidden at the edge of the door frame, waiting to see what would happen next.
“Who do you belong to, huh?” was all Yoongi could think to ask, speaking softly, as the inquisitive kitten just continued to gaze at him. Then, unexpectedly, the kitten reached out one of its soft, fuzzy forepaws, and touched Yoongi oh-so-slightly on the tip of his nose. Blinking, nose twitching, Yoongi spluttered quietly, not wanting to upset his chest’s occupant, but feeling the inevitable tickle in his nose that heralds an oncoming sneeze.
“Ahhhh-cheeky-choo!” he let out his sneeze with every attempt to not frighten the kitten, who shifted back slightly on her hind paws, looking shocked at the explosion of noise. Then, tipping her head to one side, and then back again, the kitten stood and closed the distance between its face and Yoongi’s. She extended a tiny pink tongue to lick his cheek once, turned about and circled twice, then settled on Yoongi’s chest. She tucked her impressive tail around her front paws, and laid her head to nap contentedly just under the RA’s chin.
The three freshmen withdrew out of sight before they could be detected. Jungkook silently pumped a fist as he stopped the video recording on his phone, and slipped the device into his pocket. Then, Jimin slowly pushed open the door to the RA’s office, and stepped halfway in, starting with “Have you had any escaped feline visitors maybe come find you, Yoongi? The Emotional Support Animal adoption event in the quad seems to have lost a few cuties...oh.” He stopped talking as he saw Yoongi still hadn’t moved, other than to stretch his legs back out to rest on the table, and was sipping his tea. He pointed over his shoulder to where the flame-point kitten was cleaning its paws on his desk, and then gestured to his bedroom doorway, where the shorthair tabby was playing with his tie where it hung from the back of the door.
“Yeah… you could say that I have.” He finished with a nod to the pile of sweetness sleepily purring on his chest. Jimin gestured to Taehyung and Jungkook, who each came in and grabbed one of the errant kittens invading Yoongi’s space. Jimin moved to grab the Maine Coon cutie that had claimed Yoongi as her own, but the RA frowned, and waved Jimin’s hands away.
“Don’t. Even. Touch… she can stay. I’ll talk to the pet adoption folks. I think… I think I need her.” Yoongi softly reached out with his fingers, and petted the kitten sleeping on him delicately. He was amazed at how relaxed he suddenly felt, and he just gazed at his little newfound friend with tenderness.
Taehyung and Jungkook both stood just at the threshold of the office, jaws agape, and only Jimin had the sense of decency to smile, and nod, understanding the situation a little more than his roommates could currently comprehend. He pushed the other two the rest of the way out the door, extra kittens in their grips, and pulled it quietly closed behind them, leaving it in its original barely-ajar position. He patted Taehyung on the shoulder as the three walked back to where they had “borrowed” the kittens, and sighed.
“I don’t think it’s going to be any big surprise that our RA has a soft side anymore… we really outdid ourselves.”
Jungkook was quiet for a few more strides, and then he smiled, his bunny teeth shining.
“The rest of the floor is gonna LOVE us… we’re heroes, guys. We just made the Grinch’s heart grow three sizes…”
Taehyung snorted, and laughed. “Okay, Cindy Lou Who- you’re adorkable.”
FIN