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Nights in winter had always been cold, but tonight had been strangely unbearable. The cold draughts blew through the gaps in the door, crawling its way through the estate before it found purchase on the shivering body huddled beneath the sheets. The thin cloth placed on top of him did nothing to combat the chill of the freezing winter, and yet long, delicate fingers still clung desperately onto it in hopes of even the slightest bit of warmth.
Blue eyes were hidden under long, pretty eyelashes, warm breaths leaving his lips as it condensed in the freezing air. Silence clung onto every corner of the estate, delicate and frozen like the snow billowing just outside.
The figure groaned beneath the covers of his sheets, shifting uncomfortably on his futon before deciding to sit up. It had been almost two horrendous hours since he had tried to fall asleep, but his surroundings failed to let him have even the slightest bit of rest.
Every winter promised the same outcome. When snow descended on his estate, the Water Pillar would inevitably find himself huddling in his sheets as he fought to battle the unrelenting frostbite biting on his toes.
Of course, with his former duties as a Pillar, Giyuu would often find himself battling demons in the harsh weather, shrugging away the discomfort he felt whenever a cold wind blew. It had been easy to fight back his shivers as he fought demon after demon, not wanting them to know of his apparent weakness to his cold surroundings. But in the comfort of his own home, the Water Pillar easily collapsed onto his warm futon, praying for the winter season to pass by quickly.
Winter had always been one of his most undesirable seasons.
But this winter especially had been particularly unpleasant.
Normally, during the past few winter seasons, Giyuu would find himself filling up with warmth with the people around him. Sometimes, that warmth could be found in the presence of Shinobu who would come to him with a form of some new herbal tea she had just concocted. Despite her relentless teasing and snark remarks, Giyuu would find himself growing accustomed to her presence. He looked at her as though she had been a younger sister to him, and he felt as though Shinobu had thought the same.
If not Shinobu, Tanjiro and Nezuko had crashed at his estate on an unfortunate night after training when a snow storm had hit. Of course, with Tanjiro and Nezuko came the other two obnoxious males the duo seemed to keep around.
They had been awfully loud and yelled everywhere they went. Tanjiro had tried his hardest to tame a growling Inosuke while Zenitsu stood to the side with Nezuko.
"Inosuke, calm down! This is Tomioka-san's estate. You can't just run around and do as you please!" Tanjiro had practically begged, grabbing the other male's arm as his eyes pleaded effortlessly.
"BUT-" Inosuke started, raising his arms for a fight before he looked at Tanjiro and caught the look in his eyes.
The male stilled, before his muscled body slumped down in defeat.
"Alright. Whatever." He had scoffed, seemingly annoyed, but he made no move to shove away Tanjiro's hands from his arms.
Tanjiro's lips erupted into a bright and relieved smile, eyes crinkling prettily as he thanked Inosuke.
Giyuu could have sworn he saw the hot-headed male blush.
That winter night had been especially warm, the normally quiet estate filled with the laughter and banter of joyous children. Dinner had been especially amusing to the stoic pillar, watching as Inosuke stuffed his face with chicken while Tanjiro tried to make him eat his vegetables. Nezuko, on the other hand, shuffled closer to him, rubbing herself on his haori as Giyuu lightly patted her head.
He could almost feel Zenitsu's stare.
Nevertheless, Giyuu would have been lying if he said he didn't feel even the slightest bit of disappointment when the group had to make their way back to the Butterfly Estate the following day.
Giyuu's winters were certainly unbearable, but little moments like these had ignited a small warmth to blossom in his heart. Be it Shinobu and her relentless teasing, Tanjiro and his group of maniacs, or even cheerful Mitsuri who would drop by to hand him some treats she had created. Even Kyojuro had rested at his estate one night after a gruelling mission.
Giyuu would always look forward to these moments. Even if they were seemingly fleeting, he valued the warmth they gave.
However, with these memories that plagued his mind came the unearthly chill that crawled up his spine. The former pillar knew there was absolutely no way he would get to experience that warmth ever again. The thought haunted him, his mind replaying such distant memories like that of a broken record player.
After the defeat of Muzan in the final battle, Giyuu never realised just how lonely he was until winter rolled in. There was no longer any Shinobu to come flitting by his balcony with a pot filled with herbal leaves. No longer any Mitsuri to greet him by the door with her sweet smile as she handed him a bag full of treats. And no Kyojuro to exchange casual talks with.
Tanjiro had also been unable to visit him regularly since he had been trying to build a living for Nezuko and himself.
So in other words, Giyuu had been left alone for the entirety of the winter.
He should be used to death. Should be used to the people he cared about leaving him so suddenly. But he isn't and he knows he'll never get used to it.
But for once, Giyuu truly does feel alone. Without a single ounce of warmth to protect him from the cold that slips dangerously into his body. He feels the unbearable chill swallow him completely, the whispers of winter dragging his body deeper into the freezing abyss.
He doesn't like this. He doesn't like this feeling at all.
But what can he do? It seemed as though fate had already written that he was destined to be alone for all of eternity, evident from all the people that had left him before.
He feels his eyes clog up with hot tears before it spills down his pink cheeks. They continued to pour relentlessly, reflecting the emotions the former Water Pillar had been bottling up for the past year after Muzan's defeat. He hasn't cried this much since Sabito's death.
Giyuu finds himself crying to sleep that night.
Giyuu's eyes flutter open to the sound of shuffling beside him. He blinks, mind still in a haze from sleep as he looks at his surroundings. It was still dark out, signalling that it was probably late night or very early in the morning. The temperature was still unbearable, the cold clinging to his skin like a disease.
"Oh, you're up."
Giyuu almost feels his neck breaking at how fast he had turned his head. His ocean blue eyes widened as he took in the sight of a disheveled looking Sanemi, who looked at him questioningly.
He was covered head to toe in snow, most of it scattered on his snow-white hair. He looked as though he had just run through a snowstorm. He probably had.
"Sorry for breaking in. You weren't answering your door." He gruffs out, rubbing the excess snow from his skin.
Giyuu immediately springs to his feet, left hand instinctively reaching out for an extra spare of warm clothes and a fluffy towel. He moves around the room hastily in search of them as Sanemi stands in the middle of the room, eyeing the other with lavender-hued eyes.
"What the hell are you doing here?" Giyuu mumbles, shoving the clothes towards Sanemi as the other looks him up and down.
Giyuu keeps his face facing the ground, not wanting the other to see the dried tear streaks still littering his face. He wasn't prepared for the warm hand that tilts his face up though, a surprised gasp leaving his lips as he finds himself directly facing the other's lavender coloured eyes.
Giyuu stills as Sanemi inspects his face, fingers brushing albeit uncharacteristically gently on his pale cheeks as he takes in the other's features
"You've been crying, haven't you?" Sanemi states, hands not leaving the other's face as surprisingly warm fingers drag across cold skin.
"What if i say i haven't been?" Giyuu mutters, eyes downcast as he tries to escape Sanemi's grip.
It only tightens even more.
"Then you'd be one hell of a liar, Tomioka. Your eyes are easy to read." Sanemi breathes out, face way too close for Giyuu's liking. "You're lonely, aren't you? In an empty estate, leading the last few years of your life coddled up in sheets as you pray for the winter to pass you by?"
Giyuu shivers slightly, eyes locking with the other's lavender ones.
"...and what's it to you, Shinazugawa-san? Last time i checked, you couldn't have cared less what i do and don't do." Giyuu whispers, voice so fragile and so small that Sanemi´s afraid he would break altogether.
"Because i feel the same way you do.¨ Sanemi says, voice soft and devoid of his normally rough tone.
Giyuu's eyes widen dramatically as Sanemi leans in even more, pretty blue searching lavender hues for answers.
Sanemi gives it to him.
"You feel as though you're destined to be lonely forever. No one stays by your side and you feel as though everyone you care about is bound to leave you eventually. You feel as though you should be used to it, be used to others leaving you on a whim. But you aren't. Because how can one be used to death?"
Giyuu feels his eyes begin to water at Sanemi's words, his very own thoughts leaving the lips of the snow-white male.
"And what do you get for reminding me of that?"
Sanemi looks him in the eyes, and Giyuu's breath is taken away from the absolute sincerity that bubbles from those deep purple hues.
"Because i'm here to remind you that you aren't alone, dumbass."
The words that leave Sanemi's lips pierce Giyuu's fragile heart, and he feels the hot tears streaming down his cheeks. He tries to fight them back, but Sanemi doesn't let him, opting to rub the tears away from his cheeks.
Giyuu sobs, voice breaking as he lightly hits the other's chest.
"A-and how would you know that i'm no longer alone? I have nobody left Shinazugawa." He says, voice gurgling horrifically as he tries to form coherent sentences in between his ugly sobs.
Sanemi remains silent, pulling the crying Giyuu into his chest as the other shivers from the sudden contact.
"We may have started off on the wrong foot, and i know i've been nothing but an asshole to you throughout the years. But it doesn't change the fact that we've been through the same shit together." Sanemi starts. "And right now, we've really truly only got each other."/p>
Giyuu pauses, hiccuping slightly from his cries.
Silence envelopes them like a blanket for a second, before Giyuu looks up, eyes still filled with tears.
"You're a jerk, you know that?" He mumbles, looking the other in the eyes.
Sanemi cracks the slightest grin, eyes crinkling in amusement as he chuckles.
"Yeah, i get that a lot."
Giyuu sits with his legs crossed on his futon, having already set up an extra futon beside him. He waits patiently for Sanemi to finish changing, the fluttering of his heart having not subsided. The sudden appearance of the snow-white male had definitely been surprising, and yet Giyuu finds himself not minding it even the slightest.
If anything, the former Water Pillar finds himself appreciating the former Wind Pillar's company.
The thought brings a flush and a frown to his face.
Sanemi had always been an asshole to Giyuu, so why the hell did his heart start beating erratically whenever he thought about the latter? It was no secret that Giyuu had always tried to befriend the hot-headed male, and yet his efforts had always gone to waste.
Before long, the door to his room swung open, revealing a half-dressed Sanemi in all his glory.
If Giyuu hadn't been blushing just a few minutes prior, he certainly was now. He felt the blood in his cheeks heat up, face flushing red.
"Shinazugawa-san? Why are you only half dressed?" He asks, trying to cool his features as he approaches the scarred male.
Sanemi huffs out. "Your figure is way too fucking slim for my body. I could only manage to fit into those pants of yours."
"Ah, I see. My apologies." Giyuu whispers after he finally stands in front of the other male.
From here, the former pillar could make out the many scars littering the other's body. Giyuu stares in awe, left hand itching to reach out and trail his fingers on the intricate lines.
"You can touch them if you want to." Sanemi's voice rings in his ears, and Giyuu springs back in shock.
He sees the other look at him with inquisitive eyes, and Giyuu feels the heat spread from the tip of his toes to the very ends of his blushing ears. The Water Pillar's pale complexion is replaced with warm, rosy cheeks as he brings his hand to cover his face.
"Ah, i'm sorry Shinazugawa-san. I didn't mean to stare. Why don't you just-"
Giyuu is cut off when he feels a warm arm curl around his waist, Sanemi's other hand reaching up to grab at the hand on the other's face, pulling it away to reveal the flushed expression of the Water Pillar.
"You know, i've always thought you were pretty. But this...This is just fucking unbelievable." Sanemi huffs, watching as Giyuu flushes even more.
"S-shinazugawa-san?" Giyuu reels in shock.
"Sanemi. Call me Sanemi." Sanemi breathes out.
"Sanemi..." Giyuu mutters, tasting the name on his lips, so foreign and yet so familiar.
A guttural groan leaves Sanemi's lips, surprising Giyuu as the other leans his head onto his shoulder.
"Fuck. I really can't control myself with you."
"Sanemi-san? Is something the matter?" Giyuu asks.
"Well, fuck yeah. You're the problem." Sanemi sighs out, frustrated. "How can someone be so fucking pretty and so fucking oblivious. Fuck. You know what, we've got around four more years left due to that stupid curse, so i might as well get it off my chest."
Giyuu waits patiently before Sanemi towers over him yet again.
"I like you, alright? I like your fucking pretty face and those stupidly pretty eyes of yours. I like the ohagi you made for me when you tried to befriend me. I like how you look when you think of absolutely nothing. Fuck, you even look pretty when you cry."
"Even if you reject me, I'll make sure you never feel lonely ever again. I'll stay by your side and remind you every fucking day that you've got me beside you. I'll stay by you so much that you'll beg for me to leave and even then I won't. You won't ever need to feel like you've no longer got anyone anymore, because I'm right here. I'll always be here.¨
And there goes the waterworks all over again.
Giyuu hits Sanemi lightly as the tears stream down his cheeks. "Why'd you have to say it like that, you jerk. This is the second time you've made me cry. Are you happy?"
"Well, i'd hope they were happy tears." Sanemi says, brushing the bangs out of Giyuu's eyes before he proceeds to kiss the tears from the other's eyelids.
It was so unlike Sanemi, and yet it leaves a trail of burning warmth in his heart.
"You truly are unfair." Giyuu mutters.
Sanemi raises an (non-existent) eyebrow. "How so?"
"How am i supposed to reject you when you confess to me like that." Giyuu huffs, pouting slightly.
Sanemi lets the smile form on his lips and Giyuu finds himself holding his breath yet again. Sanemi looked absolutely breathtaking when he smiled.
"Oh? Well i guess you're fucking stuck with me from now on." He chuckles.
"Well, i'd be stuck with you either way." Giyuu mutters, flushing even more as Sanemi pulls himself closer to him.
"Glad you know." Sanemi grins as he brushes Giyuu's cheeks.
"Hey, Sanemi?" Giyuu asks, earning a hum from the male behind him.
"You said you'd be by my side all the time. So, if the demon slayer curse is true, i'd be the first to die. You'd have to wait until your birthday." Giyuu whispers. "Then you'll be all alone."
Sanemi remains silent, before his arms unexpectedly wrap around Giyuu's waist from behind, eliciting a surprised gasp from the male as he's pulled into a naked chest. Giyuu tries not to squirm, blushing furiously.
Sanemi's hot breath fan the back of Giyuu's neck, causing the other to shiver.
"I know that. But all I care for is that you didn't die feeling alone. That's enough for me. Besides, I won't be alone. I still have that annoying bastard Uzui and those damn kids to keep me company." Sanemi speaks before he continues softly. "But when i die….i hope you'll be there waiting for me.¨
Giyuu turns around unexpectedly, facing the other with tears in his eyes yet again. "I hate you for being able to make me cry so easily."
Sanemi smiles sadly. "I don't know whether to feel sad or proud about that statement."
"Neither." Giyuu whispers before he lunges forward, lips connecting with Sanemi's in a kiss.
A surprised sound leaves Sanemi's lips, muffled by the kiss before he finally reciprocates, eyes fluttering shut as he tilts his head in hopes of deepening it.
Giyuu's body fills with warmth as Sanemi pulls him closer, holds him so tight as if he's afraid that Giyuu would break away from his arms if he doesn't. But he won't. Because finally. Finally, he isn't alone.
Winter inevitably becomes one of Giyuu's favourite seasons.