Chapter Text
“...no Tae. I promise I’m fine, okay?” Jimin sighs, picking up yet another item from the drawer. “Don’t worry about me.”
He doesn’t quite listen to the answer that promptly comes, too busy with eyeing the two tees he’s holding up and with trying to decide which one pleases him best. The beta’s holding the phone pressed against his shoulders and distractly hears Taehyung keep going on and on about something he can’t, for the love of god, focus on.
It’s not Jimin’s fault, it really is not, if his mind is completely elsewhere, teeth worrying his bottom lip and eyes roaming the dimly lit room, looking for something he himself doesn’t know. In his defense, he had tried to keep up at first, but his mind just won't collaborate.
Jimin addresses one last glance to the tees in his hands before throwing one on the floor and the other over his shoulder. Happy with it, he moves away to reach the chair by the window.
There’s a pile of clothes on it and something in his lower belly happily dances at the sight. Jimin eyes something of a bright yellow and a wide smile grows on his lips.
He knows it’s only been worn the other day, and a part of him is unreasonably happy because of it. The beta doesn’t think twice before taking the soft, bright fabric and throwing it too over his shoulder. He then searches for something more, something soft and warm.
Winter is nearing, he’ll need it to keep warm.
Contently nodding to himself, Jimin throws the items around until he finds a black hoodie at the bottom of the disorganized pile, smiling victoriously as he takes it with himself.
“-min? Jimin you there?”
The beta hisses as he realizes Taehyung is still there, happily chatting on the other side of the line while he has… Jimin knits his eyebrows, confusedly looking around as he wonders just what he’s been doing in the room. The beta’s not sure, he’s still holding the black hoodie close to his chest and doesn’t let go of it, not even when the omega calls for him once again.
“Yes, sorry,” he says under his breath. “I’m here.” The words sound uncertain to his own ears but he’s unable to do better.
There’s a confused frown on his face but the beta’s quick to school it away, no time to indulge on it.
Jimin walks out of the room and aimlessly roams in the small apartment, nose twitching as he catches unpleasant but faint scents, unable to pinpoint their sources, but not liking them one bit. He’s slowly growing restless as something in him screams that those scents don’t belong there, that they need to be gone.
It’s in a hurry that the beta moves to the nearest window to open it, he barely even registers it, but the need to get rid of everything foreign becomes so overwhelming he doesn’t even mind the chilly wind blowing inside the small apartment.
Jimin walks to the kitchen then, trying to escape the unpleasant scents that still linger in the air and feeling hazy and hating it.
His original intent was to get some water and sugar, old memories telling him that it might help. The beta does, indeed, search for sugar in the pantry, but he’s soon distracted by the sight of cookies and is easy to forget about his previous intent. He snatches one sweet treat from the box and gets away from there, still feeling the fog clouding his mind but ignoring it as he’s now led by a new-found purpose. The feeling is still there though, even as he roams through the empty kitchen and tries to ignore it, that haziness, the one that makes you feel sleepy and cozy and in need of cuddles and warm blankets, is still there, clogging up his mind.
Jimin’d love cuddles right now and a small pout settles on his lips when he realizes that the only person who could give him that will only be back later in the evening. He wants him now though. Wants to drown in his warm embrace and call it a day.
He mindlessly reaches the freezer and opens it, fishing out the first ice cream box he can put his hands on and silently thanking the gods above for having bought that many. He spins around, eyes looking for that something that still feels like missing, but nothing seems enough to satisfy that internal yearning.
Still, Jimin tries.
His attention falls on the strawberry basket lonely sitting one the counter, and he’s unable to hold back the happy yelp that pushes its way past his lips. The beta rushes to it and doesn’t even bother to wash the fruits, throwing the red and sweet treasures in a bowl and then looking for the whipped cream he knows must be in the fridge, hiding somewhere in there.
It doesn’t take him long to find it, to fetch a bottle of juice and a spoon, and leave the kitchen, happily trotting to the couch and putting on that one movie he’s already watched nine times but that Jimin still loves to death.
The beta doesn’t quite follow it though, too busy with keeping his mouth full of either ice cream or strawberries coated in the white sweetness. The taste of it explodes on his tongue and he lets out pleased moans at each new bite. He’s so happy because of something so simple that it feels nearly impossible, but still that little is enough to briefly soothe the emptiness and ache that’s been slowly settling in him. Yet Jimin knows it’s all still there and impossible to truly ignore, his mind unable to fully let go of the annoying feeling, distracting him with each passing minute.
Something is missing and he can’t tell what .
Jimin checks the time on his phone and it’s still too early, the sun still shines brightly outside and he can’t shake this ugly feeling off. It settles in his belly and refuses to leave him.
The movie eventually ends, the ice cream has been long forgotten and left to melt somewhere on the floor. Jimin glances down at it but can’t really bring himself to care.
He turns the television off and gets up with a frustrated huff. There’s a dull ache at the bottom of his belly and it, too, has been distracting him for hours now. He angrily looks for some painkillers and chugs them down without much thinking, mind somewhere entirely different.
Walking back to the couch he grabs his phone and mindlessly checks it, not really looking for anything but a distraction. The beta pointedly ignores the way his heart skips a beat when he notices a certain notification on the locked screen, too used to that peculiar dance to care in such a moment.
W ill go out with the others
Be back late don’t wait for me
D on’t forget to eat hyung
Any other time, the texts would have a happy smile drawn on his lips but now Jimin can’t, can’t even focus on those last words and revel in the small act of care.
All he feels is a growing upsettiness that soon shifts to become a heavy presence on his chest. The feeling of something missing becomes bigger and harder to ignore, and suddenly the beta feels cold. It’s a kind of cold that comes from within, one that he can’t simply kill under thick and heavy layers of clothes. Still, Jimin eyes the open window and scowls at it, as if it is the source of all his problems, and moves to hastily shut it close, letting out an upset huff because that feeling and that ache just won’t leave.
The beta stands in the middle of the empty apartment and feels the corners of his eyes sting. He knows there are tears collecting there, salty and burning, but stubbornly fights not to shed any, not even one.
He is not like that.
Jimin does not cry because he feels lonely, he does not sniffle or brush his tears away. He’s a strong and independent individual, one that faces everything with unfaltering fierceness and bravery. But still, Jimin’s feeling so lonely and cold and it aches so bad and he’s so lonely in the apartment.
The beta sniffles one last time and looks up at the white and stoic ceiling. It’s nothing but a weak attempt to fight off the tears that so cruelly want to break free from his hold. It barely works, just for a little, but it’s enough to allow the beta to walk around without a blurred vision, to reach his room and seek refuge in it.
When he enters it, it’s dark. It’s a pleasant kind, one that wraps around him like a safe cocoon, and Jimin doesn’t bother to turn the light on. A dim light comes from the window and reveals the countless clothes sprawled everywhere in the room. He frowns confusedly at them but is too tired to do anything and fix it.
Jimin’s too tired to do anything so, when he walks closer to the bed, he doesn’t question the presence of stray clothes on it, clothes he doesn’t quite recognize as his own. Jimin doesn’t even question the way some seem to be organized on it while others are visibly not. He looks at the bundle of clothes before him for a long moment, then moves around the bed to organize it better. Not much thinking goes into it, Jimin acts out of pure instinct and lets it tell him what to do, what’s better and what not. Once he’s done, a satisfied smile pulled on his lips, the beta stands to observe the results. It looks just perfect, something in him purring happily at the sight of a safe nest to refuge in. Without wasting time, he carefully climbs on the large bed and settles in the middle of the nest, lazily rolling around to make it undeniably his . The faint scent that has subtly lured him in, the one that feels so so right to his very core, still lingers all around and mixes with something else, something Jimin knows is his own. Not mulling over what it means, the beta shifts in the nest, contently curling up and pulling something soft and nice closer to himself.
Jimin doesn’t question it, doesn’t question his own behaviour and, more than anything, he does not question the foreign scent all around him, doesn’t even question how he can actually smell it. It doesn’t feel weird, overwhelming at most, but the beta welcomes it all and revells in the way it makes him feel, the way it seems to be working to soothe the ache growing in his lower belly and to fill the emptiness in his chest.
It’s a scent he’s never smelled before, either in the apartment or elsewhere. It holds a somehow warm and comforting note, but it’s still foreign, just like those other fainter ones had been. This scent, though, fills each and every corner of the room, reaching him in strong and overwhelming waves whenever he does as much as move on the bed. It permeates the whole place, seeping right through him and leaving him no room to escape, not that Jimin wants to.
He pushes his face deeper in the soft pillows and takes in a long, deep breath, smiling contently as yet another shiver runs down his spine.
It feels so, so good .
Good enough he’d be happy with never leaving this safe haven.
The window is closed shut but shivers he can’t control keep on running through his whole body and make the beta bury even deeper under the heavy blankets. Maybe he’s getting sick, he thinks, maybe he could just sleep it off and wake up feeling better.
This last thought, a foolish wish, is enough to let his last guards fall.
Jimin buries himself even deeper in his soft and pleasantly warm cocoon, snuggling against the soft pillow and breathing in even more of its comforting scent. He rearranges the clothes on the bed some more and wraps as much as he can around his shivering body only stopping when he's truly satisfied with the results. Only then, does Jimin let his senses fully drown in the sweet and strong and addictive scent surrounding him.
Everything gets hazy and confused and warm, and it’s so so nice. The faint yet intoxicating scent seems to be getting stronger and stronger the more he stays there, and it feels nice and warm and unexplainably like home .
Jimin really would be fine with never leaving.
Jeongguk only realizes he’s probably drunk one too many glasses of soju when he wobbles his way up the stairs and fumbles with the code to their apartment so many times he almost fears he’s forgotten it.
He hasn’t, thank god.
A breathy and silly chuckle leaves his lips, he’s unable to hold it in while thinking about spending the night locked out of his own place just because he’s too drunk to remember the right combination. He can already picture Mrs. Choi’s judging scowl in the morning and it only worsens his chuckling. Soon enough, Jeongguk gives up on holding it back. Despite it being far too late in the night to be this loud and him being aware the whole thing is not that funny, the alpha can’t stop the bubbly chuckle that rises up his throat.
Jeongguk is fighting with the knot of his shoelaces when he notices it and freezes, unable to think straight for a whole minute, trying to process what he’s sensing and make sense of it.
He and Jimin have no real rule against taking people home, nonetheless, they’ve never done it. The younger knows each one of the beta’s omega friends and knows none of them smell like this. Omega’s scents are usually sickeningly sweet for him, and so strong he can barely stand them, but this, even when cloying every corner of the small apartment, is soft and warm with a small, sweet note to it he can barely catch and identify.
It feels so good that Jeongguk has to close his eyes for a moment and force himself to breathe through his mouth. The change hardly makes it better, but it’s enough to allow the alpha to walk away from the door and into the living room.
The scent, though, gets stronger there, impossibly so, and Jeongguk’s so close to run but not too sure if head away or toward its source.
He doesn’t do either, not really.
Walking deeper into the living room, he eyes Jimin’s abandoned ice cream and wonders if the beta’s aware of the foreign scent pervading the house. It’s indeed a quite dumb thought, a beta couldn’t smell such a scent.
Jeongguk spins around himself in the small living room and is tempted to call for the other. It’s past two in the morning, though, and he’s got no intention of waking the beta up. Surely not for something he can’t even sense.
So the alpha starts to look for the source of the scent by himself, mind running to find any possible reason behind it but unable to find even just one.
It’s with no little surprise that Jeongguk finds his own room to hide what he’s looking for. He halts there for long seconds, unable to turn the knob and open the door, unconsciously scared of what he might find once he does. But then again, the more he stays there the harder it gets to resist the alluring, even when faint, sweet note lingering in the air.
It seeps through the door and in him, fogging up his mind and making it hard to think straight. Jeongguk’s afraid he might lose himself to it if he waits even just one more second so, taking a reckless, deep breath in, he pushes the door open.
When he finds himself standing on the entrance of his own room, frozen by what he sees, the alpha realizes nothing could’ve prepared him for the sight. Something dangerous in him awakens as he watches what’s been hiding in his room and feels control slip further away.
Jeongguk can’t let it, he just can’t .
Without thinking about it, holding his breath as he’s too scared to take more of that scent in, he alpha shuts the door close with haste. It causes a loud thump reverberating all around him and the alpha winces as it hangs in the intoxicating air. A part of him, cowardly and weak, fears the sound might’ve woken the older up. No sound comes from the room and Jeongguk knows Jimin hasn’t woken.
With a frustrated groan, he lets his forehead heavily hit the door and seeks relief from the cold surface and burning pain that comes after the impact.
He’s got no idea of what’s going on, but a voice in him tells it’s dangerous and he doesn’t like dangerous , not when it involves Jimin. But the beta, that scent , is in there, in his room, and it’s so, so hard not to open the door and rush back inside. It’s a fight against himself and he’s on the verge of losing it. Jeongguk’s mind gets hazier the more he stays there, and he feels lost, not knowing what to do, too scared of doing the wrong thing.
The alpha is not sure of how long he stays like that, but, at some point, the door’s not cold against his skin anymore and Jeongguk’s close to pushing away and head to the couch, or maybe out of there. Out feels like a quite good idea, even if unfairly painful.
He’s moving away, he really is, but then a flebile sound reaches him and the alpha freezes. It’s low and comes muffled through the door but he’s close enough, and has a way too good hearing to mistake the sound for anything else than what it is.
Jeongguk hears Jimin and is unable to ignore it.
The whimper comes from the other side of the door and he’s rushing in the room without even thinking about it twice. Forgetting about anything that’s not the beta.
The older man is lying in a fetal position on his bed, surrounded by countless clothes and buried under thick blankets. He’s hidden under all of it, but Jeongguk can clearly make his shape out and doesn’t hesitate to walk closer.
“Hyung?” he tentatively says. Nothing comes though, and Jeongguk’s already regretting coming inside. The scent’s much stronger in here, a cloying cloud that wraps around him and fogs his mind up even more. The alpha doesn’t leave though. He stands a few feet from the bed and waits for the older to answer his call, something in him knowing he can’t get closer until he’s allowed to do so.
Jimin doesn't answer him, he whimpers again and lets out a pained cry, something that reaches him weakly through the thick layers wrapped around him but loud enough to be heard by him.
“Hyung?" he tries again. Jeongguk looks down at him and wants nothing more but to reach the other, still he fights against it, staying still and waiting for his answer. His mind is messy, thousands of thoughts run through it but none seems to be making sense, it’s all so loud and so low at the same time, all so confused and blurred.
Jeongguk forces himself to take small breaths through his mouth but, even so, it feels too much. The alpha knows he should go away, call for Taehyung and let the omega deal with it, even when he doesn’t quite know what it truly is. He’s well aware of what he should do, but even just the idea of leaving has something in him protesting with a raged growl, and Jeongguk knows he won’t do any of what he should.
“Jimin,” he says again, worry rising from his chest to his throat as the other doesn’t seem to hear him.
Then, when Jeongguk’s nearly lost hope, he catches a muffled sound coming from the older and the bundle of blankets shifts to reveal a honey haired head. Warm brown eyes blink several times as the older peeks at him from his cocoon.
“Sweet pea,” he breathes, entranced by those same eyes he’s seen countless times before. The words flow gently and mellow from his lips, low and tender as if it’s nothing but a secret between the two of them, and they linger in the air as if unwilling to disappear. Still, there’s an evident note of worry hiding in his voice and he’s unable to hide it.
No true answer comes for long moments.
The silence around them then breaks as yet another whimper leaves Jimin’s lips. It jumps against the room’s walls and fills the place obscenely, obscenely enough that something forbidden coils in Jeongguk’s lower belly. In the sound lingers a mixture of pain and something the alpha’s too scared to name, something that is as intoxicating to him as the scent that surrounds them.
The younger dares then, and takes one small step closer to the bed, mindful not to cut the distance between them too short. Some deep rooted, visceral, kind of instinct leads his every move even when refusing to give him the answers he’s so desperately craving for.
The bundle of blankets and limbs shifts on the bed, as if reacting to him, and Jeongguk stops, eyes fixated on the older as he fears what will come.
But Jimin, sweet, lush, whimpering Jimin, moves from the blankets’ shell he’s built all around his body, shifting on the bed barely enough to reveal more of himself. Then, he looks straight up at the alpha.
Jeongguk is sure his heart stops on its track, it jumps, makes a double no, triple flip, and then picks up at a much quicker and more dangerous pace.
Jimin’s eyes shine with a wet sheen and Jeongguk’s sure he can catch the dried paths of salty tears down his flushed and full cheeks. Even in the dimly lit room, his eyes are able to pick on each and every smallest detail. Then, they fall to his own yellow hoodie, held close to the younger’s chest as one fist clutches it tight and brings the fabric to his nose, almost entirely hiding his face. His attention is then caught by how shivers run through his body at regular intervals, and a thin sheet of sweat makes his skin glister under the dim light.
They stare at each other and, for a second, Jeongguk is ready to bet his everything that the sweet yet faint note in the air, the one that’s been gently cloying everything around him, has spiked up when their eyes met. The scent floods his senses, gets as inebriating as it possibly could, and it’s enough to lead the alpha one step closer to the brim of insanity, bordering a cliff he’s getting less and less scared to jump from.
Jeongguk wills himself to shake free from the hazy trance he’s fallen in and dares to take one step closer, eyes never leaving Jimin’s in the search of a hint to stop. None is to be found though, and the scent only grows more and more addicting the closer he gets. It’s when the alpha is hardly a few steps from the bed that the older moves. He shifts to sit, shaking off the blankets and clothes shielding him, and revealing more and more of his small figure.
Like this, the blanket falls to Jimin’s lap, revealing a sliver of his thighs, supple and pale skin calling for the younger’s attention. At the sight of it, at the realization that the other’s wearing nothing but an oversized shirt, Jeongguk’s got to put at work all of his power will not to rush and close the distance between them and-
He shakes his head. That’s no safe path to let his thoughts take.
Jimin’s still looking at him, lips wet and swollen and dangerously inviting, glazed over by a sheen that glimmers under the weak light in which everything bathes.
“Jungkook?”
It’s like the beta’s just now acknowledging him, and it leaves the alpha puzzled and gaping for something to say. But all he can do is look like a fish and try his damndest best not to glance down at Jimin’s lap once again. It’s nearly impossible though as his hands are resting just above his thighs, pushing the covering fabrics away to reveal more and more flushed skin and supple flesh. For one, short second Jeongguk lets himself wonder about how it must feel to dig his fingers in it, feel the softness of the other’s body and, at the same time, the firmness of his muscles, marking him up all pretty and never letting him leave his side.
It lasts barely a second but, as soon as the alpha realizes where his thoughts are heading, when he realizes what is letting them run free in his head, he’s close, oh so close to turn and leave.
Jeongguk knows the wisest choice would be to get away, close the door shut and leave because the more he stays the less he feels like himself. A wicked, betraying voice in him, though, tells the alpha that’s a lie because he knows, deep down, what’s the truth. Because, deep down, Jeongguk knows that the more he stays there, the more the cracks in his resolve deepens and threaten to make everything he’s managed to build crumble.
Jeongguk’s known Jimin for five years, living with him for three and loving him in the safety of his own self for just as long. It’s a dangerous thing, to love, and it only gets worse when the loved one is Jimin. Still, the feeling has grown in him with every free-given smile, every whine and scolding session, with every mismatched pair of socks and with every tempting, lingering touch.
It has grown in him without the alpha noticing, in that easy way just the most dangerous yet sweet kind of things come to be.
Loving Jimin is dangerous, and yet he’s diven head first in the feeling, relishing in the warm and cozy embers burning pleasingly in him.
Loving Jimin is dangerous. It truly is, because he’s so much stronger than Jeongguk is, and has made clear, more than once, that he needs no one by his side. And so, the alpha’s fallen for this facet of him too, for the fierceness burning wild behind his irises and for the strength hiding behind his soft yet sharp features.
Jimin’s declared countless times that he’d never let anyone tie him down, do to him what his parents did to each other, and yet, despite being the one listening to him each and every time, Jeongguk’s inevitably and irreversibly fallen for the older man. The alpha knows he has long since walked past the coming back line.
“Jeongguk?”
That sweetly spoken call is just enough to drag him out of his own head and to make his focus fall back on him.
Neither speaks though. There are no words to be said as both are slowly growing to understand but neither seems to be brave enough to acknowledge the truth or act the right way. That’s why, when Jimin scoots back and pats the now free space on the bed, when he looks up at the alpha with a badly concealed plea in his eyes, Jeongguk doesn’t think twice before finally closing up the distance between them and kneeing on the bed, far too mindful not to ruin the messy nest.
All the while, he can feel Jimin attentively observe him with eyes wide and lips agape. He’s being studied by the other, Jeongguk knows, yet can’t mind, not when his mind is a hazy mess of what if’s and endless don’t do’s. All go blissfully ignored as he finds his place on the bed and kneels there, looking back at the older.
“I-” Jimin starts, but then his lips close in a firm line and his eyes fall to his lap. Both are kneeling one before the other, just a few inches dividing them, and Jeongguk’s whole self itches to close the gap and reach for him. He doesn’t dare to though.
“I don’t know what I’m doing,” he mutters after a short pause, and something in Jeongguk breaks because he knows.
Jimin’s nesting, he’s looking for comfort and safety, protecting himself from the whole world, the most instinctual part of him knowing he’ll need it in his weakest moment.
And he’s letting Jeongguk in.
Something in the alpha happily and proudly purrs at that, but he’s got no right mind to pay it attention. All his focus is set on the older and on the way he’s nervously biting over his lower lips, on his fidgeting fingers and warm eyes that keep on escaping his searching ones.
The silence falls over them all over again and it’s tense and heavy and quickly becomes too much for Jeongguk to bear so, without putting much thought in it, he caves in and reaches out to take the Jimin’s hand in his own.
It’s soft and hot to the touch, and there’s a slight tremble to it that the alpha tries his best to ignore, knowing Jimin must be hating each and every second of what’s going on. Neither will be able to help it, there’s no way to change what’s going to happen and that same thing in Jeongguk seems to be breaking even more, shattering in countless pieces when put before the older’s pain.
“It’s alright sweet pea. Everything’s going to be alright.”
There’s no way to say how much he himself believes in those words but, still, the alpha does his best to make his voice come out steady and reassuring.
Jimin doesn’t answer him and lets his eyes look around, desperately trying to find answers that are nowhere to be found.
Like this, so close to the beta, the sweet note in the scent that’s been so freely floating all around them seems to be getting even stronger. And still, it’s not too much. It doesn’t make his nose scrunch up nor make him want to pull away. The faint note is a pleasing and comforting one that calls the alpha in and pleads him to stay.
Jeongguk complies, unable to do otherwise.
Just for a little while , he tells himself.
“C’mon hyung,” he breathlessly says.
Everything's so much and Jeongguk knows he won't be able to hold on for long.
Everything's so much, so hard and intoxicating, he feels himself falling more and more into the hazy heat that surrounds them both. The alpha feels his resolution crumbling more and more, yet manages to push the next words out of himself.
“Let's move to your room.”
It’s quite a useless thing to say, he’s aware, but still Jeongguk has to try. It didn’t go unnoticed to the alpha that the beta, the former beta, has picked his room to refuge in, his clothes to build his nest with. It hasn't gone unnoticed, and neither have the many implications to it.
Jeongguk, though, knows he can’t let it get to his head, feed his foolish hopes and make everything all the more complicated. He doesn't need that, can't afford it.
He’s an alpha and Jimin’s presenting as an omega.
It’s biology and nothing more.
but there's a familiar and cruel voice whispering from the recesses of his head and in his head it begs to differ.
Jeongguk, though, does his best to ignore it, and focuses all of his attention on the older man.
Jimin’s looking up at him, but his gaze seems to be lost somewhere far from there, eyes staring right through him and falling on the void. A deep scowl has set on his face and a pout shapes his full, wet lips. Jeongguk looks at him and, it's stronger than him, he thinks about how easy it'd be to lean down and kiss him.
His hand still engulfs Jimin's and the touch is as warm as it's enticing, dangerous just like anything else is.
Dangerous.
The word rings loud and nagging in his head and Jeongguk knows he can't ignore it, knows it's the truth. This is dangerous, all of this is and will only lead them both to pain.
His eyes fall down to where their hands are linked once again, and wishes he could pull away. Jimin wouldn't let him though, so the alpha doesn’t even try.
“No,” the older man says. It's barely a whisper. let out a few inches from him, but it resounds loud and clear in the silent room.
Familiar firmness shapes that simple word into a command and, despite everything in him knowing it's wrong, the thought of obeying becomes more and more alluring.
Everything in the alpha wants to claim it as a proof of sorts, as an invite to just let go and give in. Because, even when the scent is nothing like what it’ll get later on, even when Jimin’s just entering his pre-heat, everything in him is intoxicating. It's alluring and so cruelly tempting that it’s hard for Jeongguk not to cave in and take everything the other is willing to offer.
“No?” he manages to ask, voice weak and broken but still loud enough to be heard. Foolishly, Jeongguk hopes the older won't notice.
Jimin doesn’t look at him when he speaks again, eyes falling once again to his lap.
“Can we-” he tries, but his voice breaks as the next words seem to be stuck in his throat. Jeongguk stays silent, enchanted as he watches him nervously bite his lower lip and mull over his next words. “Can we stay?” Saying this, Jimin looks up at him with glazed, pleading eyes.
Once again that night, Jeongguk realizes he's nothing but a weak, weak man.
For a second, he could swear his brain stops working. Yet, he hears a weak, strangled ‘yes’ push its way past his lips.
As soon as he hears it, Jimin lets out a high pitched squeal and jumps from where he’s kneeling to throw himself at the other.
How cruel.
Jeongguk freezes and prays as hard, as earnestingly, as he can for the other not to notice.
Just like that, with their bodies pressed one against the other, a few things seem to happen all at once.
A new wave of sweet, tantling scent hits him and pushes his eyes to close and lungs to cry for more. Then, led by pure muscle memory, or maybe reflexes, or maybe even instincts, Jeongguk’s hands fly to the other’s slim waist and tug him close, barely so but still enough to make Jimin lean against him.
His lean body is pressed against the alpha’s firm chest and it feels so natural, so right, that neither dare to question it. Instead, Jimin leans in even further close, if possible, and decides to just kill Jeongguk on the spot.
The presenting omega shifts on the bed, hands finding support on the alpha’s shoulder and eyes unwilling to meet the other’s. Jimin only stops moving when he’s fully sitting on the younger’s lap, face safely buried in the crook of his neck.
They stay still then, everything is still in time, frozen. It is, until Jeongguk hears sweet and pleased sounds, purrs , leaving the older’s wet lips. He could swear to feel all his blood start to rush to one, specific place upon hearing them and helplessly prays Jimin won’t notice. Somehow, thanks to some merciful god, he doesn’t seem to. He limplessly rests against Jeongguk and keeps on taking in lungfuls of his scent, pressing himself closer and closer even when no space is left in between the two of them.
The alpha knows his scent should still be too weak for him to catch it, yet Jimin seems able to, craving for more and more and more, unwilling to be satisfied with what he can have.
The grip over presenting omega’s hips tightens, shivers running down Jeongguk’s spine as he feels him nuzzle against sensitive, unmarred skin. Wet lips press a trail of gentle kisses there, and it’s such a feathery touch that they could as well be nothing but tricks of Jeongguk's mind. Imprints just as wet are left behind, though, and it’s impossible for the alpha to hold back the broken gasp that leaves his lips, a new shiver runs through his whole body and brings goosebumps over his skin. Jimin’s breath fans over the spot he’s just left and it feels like the cruelest of the tortures.
Jeongguk wills himself to stay still and silent as he feels the omega shift on him, pressing over all the wrong yet right spots. His lips close shut into a thin line and his head moves on its own accord, tilting back to allow the older more access. His hold over Jimin is steady but not forcing, yet his muscles are tense, unable to relax as the presenting omega keeps on pressing down on him with each and every small shift.
In his head, a bloody war is being waged, and he’s trying so, so hard not to give in, to push Jimin away and remind himself this is not fair, that this is not what the older wants. But then, a wet touch laps over his scent gland and he loses it.
Jeongguk truly loses it, and, what's worse, he’s unable to feel guilty.
It takes the alpha little effort to raise the presenting omega’s body off of his own and throw him on the bed. He watches, rapted, as Jimin bounces on the bed, falling on his back with a wicked smile tugging at the corners of his lips. Revelling in the attention he’s given, lost in the hazy and warm fog that has brought the pain away, Jimin lets his pink, wet tongue poke out to invitingly run over his bottom lip. Jeongguk has no other choice but to watch, spellbound by the sight below him and feeling a peculiar kind of hunger grow in his core.
The omega's looking back at him with clouded eyes and the younger knows, he knows , this is all wrong. But not even a fiber in him is able to fight the urge to dive in, not when it all is so busy asking him for more.
Jeongguk complies, too weak to even try and fight it.
He leans down, slowly closing the gap between them and aiming at the sensitive, neglected source of the faint but addicting scent that's been permeating the room, driving him crazy. He noses at the unmarred skin, nuzzles softly against it and takes in as much as he can.
Jeongguk takes him in until he feels high and lost in the scent, and, still, it doesn’t feel enough, not strong enough to satisfy the growling force in him. It grows and grows and leaves nothing of him but the need to take and give and cherish. His lips refuse to leave the presenting omega and he can't help but let his instincts take the lead.
It feels so nice, so undeniably right, that it's like Jeongguk's never had a saying in it to begin with. Under him, Jimin writhes weakly and lets a trail of moans leave his lips. The broken sounds do nothing but encourage the younger to keep going, even when weak and strangled. It is just as addicting as any other thing about Jimin, and the want for more leads Jeongguk’s each and every movements and thoughts.
Everything about the omega seems to be asking for more, threatening not to stop until it’ll finally be enough. Both know, though, it will never be enough.
The alpha doesn’t leave the older’s neck until he feels hands push at his shoulders. Then, mild worry flashing on his face, he pulls away to look down at Jimin.
The older stares up at him and lets a taunting smile settle on his lips, but doesn’t say a word, too busy with getting lost in the alpha’s eyes.
Tired of it, hunger still roaring in him, Jeongguk leans down once again to nuzzle against the omega’s cheek, moving down from there to press a teasing trail of kisses until he finds his neck. There, he settles and lets his tongue lap and lavish, desperately trying to get more of the frustratingly faint scent.
“Jeongguk.”
The older is splayed below him and takes what he’s given, broken sounds leaving his lips the moment the alpha starts to suck on a particularly sensitive spot. It sends new shivers down his spine and his toe curls at how good it feels. Jimin can’t think, too high on the feeling of warm body against his own and on the cloying and soothing scent permeating everything all around him. Jeongguk doesn’t listen to him and keeps on sucking, as if it could be enough to pull more of the intoxicating scent out of the elder. It is not and, with a groan, the alpha gives up.
His head hides in the crook of Jimin’s neck as he lets his hands roam down the curve of his waist, to his hips and then thighs. There, supple and bare flesh fills his hold and it’s so good he can’t help but grasp them tighter, feeling his fingers dig and hoping they’ll leave a mark behind.
The image of Jimin’s body all flushed and marked up, all pretty and warm and sweet just for him has something primal push inside the alpha. It manifests through a growl, deep loud, that feels the whole room and hangs in the air for endless moments.
Under him, Jimin keens and pulls Jeongguk closer. The latter doesn’t move away nor resists, all he does is pepper the soft skin with gentle kisses.
“Jeongguk,” he lets out. It’s something halfway through a moan and call, and goes ignored as the alpha refuses to leave his neck.
Jimin’s hands move from his shoulders and one goes to rest over his nape, caressing it as low rumbles reverberate through the both of them. It takes the younger a moment, maybe two, to realize it’s him and not the older who’s emitting them. The low, deep purrs come from him and fill the static air all around like a comforting melody.
Jeongguk’s not sure of how, or when, but, somehow, the lust and want in them both have shifted into something softer and gentler. He doesn’t mind it, meekly following the shift and relishing in the haziness that has long since taken over him.
Under him, Jimin has stopped moving and his chest heavens with a quiet and steady rhythm. For a moment, Jeongguk fears he might’ve fallen asleep but the gentle caresses at the nape of his neck still continue, and he knows the older’s simply basking in the comforting feeling of being close.
Jimin’s just entered his pre-heat and things will be confusing for a while, hormones bringing him up and down and draining him whole as his body gets ready for what will come. At the thought of it, Jeongguk goes tense and knows the older notices.
He wishes it could be ignored or procrastinated, but it can’t and he needs to talk to Jimin. Reluctantly, he presses one last kiss against the omega’s skin, little below his ear, and pulls away just enough to look at him.
The sight he’s met with has a fond smile draw on his lips and he can’t help but lean back even more to enjoy it. Jimin’s eyes flutter closer, but he stubbornly wills them open to stare right back at him. His cheeks are flushed and eyes glazed, and the alpha thinks he’s never looked as pretty. He takes a moment to observe him, takes in a deep breath, and wills his voice out.
“We should talk.”
Jimin nods, but shifts on the bed and manages to make him lose his balance. The omega turns on the side and curls up, pulling a black shirt close to himself and humming contently.
“Okay,” he murmurs and it drags a short-lived, breathy chuckle out of the younger. “Jimin,” he reprimates, but his call goes ignored.
With a heavy sigh, Jeongguk relents and promises himself they will talk in the morning, knowing how stubborn the older can be when he wants to and too weak to fight him. The alpha moves around on the bed and lays to face Jimin.
He stares at the omega and knows he won’t be able to sleep, not when the other is so close and his scent still surrounds him, cloying and tantling yet soothing.
Neither speaks for a long time, the older’s eyes have fallen close but Jeongguk fears he might not be sleeping yet. Still, he dares and reaches out to brush a stray lock from his face.
“Pretty,” he whispers, so low it might as well be the wind’s voice. But the window’s closed shit and there’s no one but them in the room.
“Am I?”
Jimin’s answer comes not much after and so does the pleased curve that shapes his lips. His eyes flutter open and force them both to stare at each other in silence. Jeongguk looks into those eyes he knows to be so warm and wonders what will come next. After this moment, after this night, after Jimin’s heat. He wonders what will be of them, wonders if he will be strong enough not to ruin everything.
A low hum leaves him and it’s all the answer the younger gets.
Silence falls over the room and stretches out for endless moments, then Jeongguk speaks again. He knows it won’t lead them anywhere, not now, but still he tries as a specific fear starts to settle in him.
“We should talk.”
Jimin hums upon hearing that but doesn’t answer right away.
“No.”
It comes unexpected and Jeongguk’s not sure he heard it right. His eyebrow furrows and he looks at the omega questioningly.
“I don’t want to,” Jimin adds then, and the alpha can relate to that far too well. To talk will break the cocoon they’ve created for themselves, it will draw new lines and tear them away. They have to, though.
“I’m sorry, sweet pea.”
“Don’t say that.” There’s something oddly angered in his voice and Jeongguk can feel the scowl on his face deepen. “Don’t say that when you don’t know what you’re apologising for.”
Those words, mumbled more than outright said, leave him puzzled. Jeongguk gapes as he looks down at the older and wonders about his reasons. He tries so speak, to reply, but Jimin scoots closer and hides his face against the alpha’s chest, seeking comfort in the same person who’s able to hurt him that easily. Jeongguk wishes he could understand, talk about it more, but he’s not allowed to and lets out a sigh as he vows to himself, again, they will talk in the morning.
“I’m sleepy.”
The alpha lets his arms reach out to hug Jimin and pull him closer, leaning down to take in more of that faint, beautiful scent. He lets his eyes close and tries his best to ignore the knot forming in his throat.
“Then sleep,” he says, breathing those words against Jimin’s soft hair.
“I don’t want to. What if you’re not here when I wake up.” It was supposed to be a question, should have, but comes out like a statement and it hurts. Jeongguk could swear he feels his heart stop as he hears those words hang in the air between them. His heart stops, frozen on the spot, then breaks.
Instinctively, the alpha pulls Jimin even closer as if to prove him he won’t go anywhere, won’t leave.
“I’ll be here.”
He feels the omega pull away in his hold and lets him. He looks up at the alpha, searches for something in his eyes, and Jeongguk helplessly hopes he’ll find the right answers.
Maybe he does.
“Promise?”
“Promise, sweet pea.”
Another low hum follows and Jimin’s back at pushing himself closer to Jeongguk’s chest, hands fisting his shirt and nose pressed to him. The alpha feels him take lungfuls of air and smiles to himself, loving the way he’s able to soothe Jimin like that.
“You smell so nice.”
The omega’s voice reaches him after a long while and it nearly surprises him. All he does, though, is pull the older even closer so that they nearly mold and become one.
“Goodnight, sweet pea,” Jeongguk whispers, letting his eyes close shut and feeling the knot in his throat loosen up ever so slightly. Jimin hums at his words, a lazy answer that gets lost against the planes of Jeongguk’s chest.
The whole night, the alpha holds him close, unable to sleep as the omega’s pressed against him. It feels too nice, too unreal, and he dreads the morning’s coming, foolishly wanting to delay it for as long as possible. Eventually, though, the sun rises boldly in the sky and finds them both still close.
Jeongguk’s let tiredness get to him and, for the first time in a long while, Jimin’s able to wake up and watch the younger without fearing he might notice.
He lets his eyes roam over the sharp lines of his face, the arch of his eyebrows and the dark eyelashes that throw shadows over his cheekbones. The omega observes him, taking in those small details he’s always loved from afar and feels a sigh push its way past his own lips.
Jeongguk wanted to talk.
The only thought, prospect, of it has his guts churn and twist and dread crawl around his heart. Jimin doesn’t want to talk. He wants to stay like this and bask in the elder’s scent. In his scent .
He closes his eyes and smiles widely, unable to wrap his head around it all. For as scary as it is, for as much as the omega knows he will hate it all later on, right now it feels so right, as if the smelling Jeongguk is enough to be worth it all.
He’s so stupid.
Another sigh leaves him, but it’s weaker and broken. Jimin feels his lower lip wobble and bites over his lower lip to make it stop.
Jimin’s so so so stupid.
The omega’s eyebrows furrow as he tries to keep the tears in, hating the way he feels that familiar sting at the corner of his eyes.
Right now he’s in Jeongguk’s arms. Jimin can't let anything ruin this, not when he knows it will only last until the younger wakes up. But it’s so hard to fight against his own mind and fears. It’s so hard and a broken sob pushes his way past the omega’s lips.
Against him, Jeongguk shifts on the bed and he tenses up. No sound comes through and, after a long moment in which Jimin can’t bring himself to even breathe, he forces his body to relax. Somehow, for some cruel trick of the universe, this is when he feels gentle fingers brush over the soft skin of his cheeks.
Jeongguk’s woken up and Jimin feels his heart run miles per seconds and skip several beats all at once. His guts flip and stomach closes, throat tying up in a tight knot.
Now, they will have to talk.
Jimin doesn’t want to.