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There are a few things Jimin fears. It used to be a lot, the world was a bit too big for him, always a tiny child, but his mom taught him everything he needed to know to survive and after years of experience and life threatening situations the fears have gone down; living by yourself in the forest does that to someone.
There are few things he fears; a bleeding wolf is one of them.
The smell of blood is pungent in the air, even his human nose can smell it from afar. But if it wasn’t the smell of blood that alerted him of the wolf it would have been its snarls and growls. The animal must be really hurt and in pain to be this noisy, wolves are one of the best predators in these woods, always silent and alert and ready to pounce on their preys.
Jimin forces himself to even his breathing and hunches behind a brush. It snowed heavily the night before so luckily the freshness in the air will be enough to hide his scent from the wolf.
The wolf is big, light grey fur, almost white if not for the blood covering its coat. It’s breathing harshly in between growls. He feels bad for the creature, taking in consideration the amount of blood and its trashing, doesn’t seem it has much left.
Unsure of how to proceed, Jimin keeps himself hidden but still observant, watching as the wolf tries, again, to raise from its hunched form on the floor. But its wounds seem deep and painful and its legs tremble for a second before giving in again, another loud growl filling the silence between the trees. Jimin thinks it sounds more like the animal is angry at himself for being hurt rather than whining because of pain.
And that makes Jimin grow wary, no wolf would act like that; he knows, he has crossed paths with wolves before, a wounded animal would never be this loud, would never put itself at risk of being found by another predator.
It dawns on Jimin this wolf is not a normal wolf.
In what he wants to call an act of bravery, he stands up; his mother would probably scold him though, call him stupid for making his position known to a predator, even if injured they can be dangerous. But if the wolf is what Jimin thinks it is, the urge to help weights heavier than his instinct telling him to run off.
He approaches the animal carefully, silently, but startles to a stop when the wolf suddenly snaps its head in his direction and growls loud and menacing, big teeth glinting with the sunlight.
“I’m not gonna hurt you,” Jimin says, making a show of dropping the axe he had secured in his belt to the floor to prove his point. “ I just want to help you.”
But the wolfs keeps snarling, even tries to stand up again to fail the next second; poor thing feels trapped now, probably thinking Jimin, a human, will definitely try to kill. Jimin would be scared too were he in the same situation; Humans are not trustworthy beings.
“I know what you are.” he says, kneeling on the floor after a few more careful steps closer, reaching out a hand. He’s not dumb enough to put his hand close enough for the wolf to bite, he just wants the animal to smell him, see he’s really not a threat.
His words seem to surprise the wolf, though, suddenly stopping its snarling for a second before starting again. It’s not trusting Jimin.
“If you don’t let me help you, you are going to die,” he says, voice soft in an attempt at seeming even more harmless. “I live close, I can heal your wounds. Just let me help you.”
The wolf stares at him, straight to his eyes and Jimin thinks for a second he’s looking directly at a night sky; one of those that have no clouds and all the stars shine bright like no other night.
And then the wolf starts to move, limbs jerking and head snapping in different directions; the fur starts to disappear and the sound its bones make as they rearrange place has goosebumps raising on Jimin’s skin. The transformation must be painful on its own, but going through it while injured must make it even harder.
When the wolf finally transforms to a human man, Jimin gasps at the amount of blood. He can’t even see the severity of his wounds because of the amount of blood but seeing how the man is now clutching as his side, eyes squeezed shut in pain and breathing even more hard than before he has not much time left.
So Jimin ,with much difficulty ,manages to take the heavy man to his cabin.
His mother would definitely scold him for bringing home -his safe place- a stranger, for being stupid enough to trust a predator. Jimin tells the little voice in his head to shut up and let him work, he will berate himself later for his actions.
He cleans the man’s wounds, deep gashes that go from his shoulder to his navel, and even if it’s not his favourite part of the process, he sutures them too; his mother taught him how to do it for when he would need it himself and up until now he has only had to stitch himself very few times. It still grosses him out, though.
After applying some balm and wrapping him up the man is left unconscious on a bunch of blankets he had to spare in a makeshift bed. He knows wolves are sensitive to smell, so letting the man rest on Jimin’s own bed would probably make him restless during his sleep, agitated with a new and unknown smell.
And now, he can only wait.
It’s a week after that the wolf returns to a proper conscious state. He had been in and out, mumbling incoherent words and trashing a bit in his bed, high on his fever. Jimin did his best to maintain the wounds clean and the man nourished, praying to deities he doesn’t believe in to avoid any infection.
When the man wakes up Jimin is outside the cabin chopping wood. He hates it, makes his arms hurt and his hands blister, but he had been running low on wood for the fire and seeming as it will snow heavily soon he doesn’t want to be trapped inside the cabin without anything to heat himself up or cook with.
A loud noise is what alerts him his newest house mate is awake, and so he rushes inside to find the man trying to stand up on wobbly knees. In his attempt at getting up he had knocked a couple of chairs, making a mess in the already unorganised small cabin.
“You shouldn’t be up yet.” says Jimin a bit alerted. His bandages seem to still be clean but if he keeps forcing himself like this he will for sure burst a stitch. When Jimin tries to get closer the man backs off, clumsily tripping with the blankets on the floor before falling on his butt.
“Fuck” curses the man, gasping in pain. Jimin bites his lip, surprised by the man’s deep voice.
He seems young, Jimin guessed they were about the same age given his features and the sparkly eyes he remembers getting lost staring at. His voice was enough to remind Jimin of the potential danger he himself allowed into his house.
“You shouldn’t move.” Jimin says again, approaching him slowly. When the man growls at him, even going as far as showing him his teeth menacingly, Jimin stops and lifts a hand, trying to show he’s not a threat. “I think you opened your wounds, I just want to check.”
The man looks down to his torso, and now that he’s not holding his side, Jimin can see that indeed he has opened a wound, some blood starting to seep through. But even seeing the blood coating his bandages, the wolf seems to hesitate, averting his eyes from his torso to Jimin warily.
“Look, I kept you alive for a week.” Jimin says, a bit more loudly, voice reprimanding, “It was really a hassle to move you here to my cabin and keeping your wounds clean, don’t ruin my hard work now because you are being stubborn.”
The man stares at him dumbfounded and Jimin takes the chance to get closer to inspect his wounds. The wolf gets tense for a moment, as if ready to defend himself from any attack but when he sees Jimin reaches for his bandages he relaxes.
Luckily the damage is not worth of worry, Jimin cleans it up and secures his stitches closed before bandaging it once again, awfully aware of the pair of eyes staring intensely at him during the whole process. The man is big, Jimin had noticed before while he was moving him to his cabin; he’s tall and muscly, heavy. The wolf could easily overpower him even in his state, push him away and run away, but instead he sits there, big and almost innocent eyes studying his every move. Jimin feels like a little lamb.
“Why are you helping me?” says the wolf once Jimin is done.
Jimin leans back from his body staring up at him; he’s handsome, big eyes but sharp jawline, so contradicting but at the same time so fitting, long curly hair endearingly messy. He hadn’t seen another wolf in a human form in ages.
“Why wouldn’t I?” he choses to answer when he can’t really come up with a reason. Yeah, why is he helping a stranger, a wolf, a predator, a potential danger.
He goes to the tiny kitchen, serving some stew he did the day before into a bowl and offers it to the wolf, who reluctantly accepts it.
“It’s not poisoned.” Jokes Jimin when he sees the wolf sniff at it. It makes the wolf blush slightly and Jimin bites his lip to refrain his giggles. Cute. Are wolves supposed to act like this?
“Aren’t you scared of me?” says the wolf in between spoonfuls. He seems to enjoy the meal a bit too much considering he was weary of it barely a minute ago.
“Should I?”
The wolf lifts his eyes from the bowl and stares directly at Jimin. The stay like that for a moment, Jimin getting lost again in those sparkly eyes; they really seem to hold entire skies inside.
“You said…” starts the wolf, voice soft, frowning a bit in thought, “you said you knew what I was, before I transformed. You have come across others like me before.”
And it’s not a question, it’s a statement that Jimin can’t deny because he had indeed said that to him. But despite Jimin’s a bit stupid urge to help this wolf, he’s a stranger after all, he has no business in Jimin’s personal matters.
Jimin huffs, taking the bowl from the wolf’s hands to go serve another one. Someone as big and muscly as this man needs to eat plenty, specially if he wants to recover fast. Jimin wants him already out of his home.
“You are not answering my questions.”
“I don’t have to answer anything to you.” says Jimin, offering him his bowl again. When the wolf doesn’t take it, he clucks his tongue impatiently and shoves it in his hand. “I have things to do. You just eat, rest and heal quickly so you can keep going with your life.”
“Why are you getting angry at me now,” counters the man, shaking his head in disbelief at Jimin’s hostility. “you saved me because you wanted to, I didn’t ask for your help.”
He’s right, Jimin knows, it’s normal to ask questions; Jimin would too. The problem is Jimin is not ready to answer them, to face the real reason he brought a wolf to his home after years of solitude.
“Eat and heal and then get out of my house. “ Jimin says, jaw clenched and posture tense.
The wolf rumbles in response but Jimin ignores the familiarity of that sound and goes outside again, taking out his frustration by chopping more wood.
-----------------
Jimin learns his name days later, but not because he asked. The man - Jungkook- offered it on his own after the nth time Jimin referred to him as ‘hey, you’ when he wanted to catch his attention for something.
Jimin didn’t want to offer his name back, the less they know about each other the better, but Jungkook had not stopped asking until he gave in.
Jimin doesn’t want to be friends, but Jungkook makes it hard.
All that uncertainty and distrust the wolf seemingly had towards Jimin the first time they met has banished. Jungkook talks quite a lot despite being shy —maybe to fill the prolonged moments of silence Jimin offers— and that’s how Jimin learned what happened to him: he had been out hunting with a few other wolves from his pack when they crossed path with a bear. That was a surprise, by the time it starts snowing like it is right now bears are already hibernating, but this one must have been young and the cold had caught to him before he could get enough storage for winter. In an attempt to protect their prey and themselves Jungkook had gotten caught in a fight with the bear.
The other two wolves escaped but Jungkook’s wounds had been too deep and painful and disoriented him enough to get lost in the woods. Jimin watched amused how that admission made Jungkook blush, as if embarrassed a wolf had lost its way. Jimin had thought to himself that it wasn’t something he should feel bad about, he had been injured almost deadly. Heck, even Jimin has gotten lost plenty of times despite living in the woods for years now.
But Jimin had swallowed down his words of comfort. Jungkook is not his friend.
So Jimin tries to ignore him the first few days, spends a lot of time outside the cabin preparing for when the winter will hit harsher, but Jungkook is persistent in an almost endearing way. Every time Jimin enters the cabin Jungkook seems to perk up, when Jimin is cleaning his wounds, Jungkook won’t stop staring; he thinks he has caught him sniffing at him, as if seeking for his scent. And when he started feeling strong enough to get up on his own, he followed Jimin around the cabin like a puppy, asking if he needs help with anything, cleaning the rooms or warming up water for Jimin to bathe with after being the whole day out hunting or taking care of his little farm— that only has carrots and turnips, the only things he had managed to grow on these lands. Jimin is sure he would go outside with him to hunt as well if not because Jimin forbid him of so, scared he would open his wounds.
And despite how it annoys him, he appreciates it; having someone to talk with, who will listen to what he has to say. Opening the door of his cabin after an exhausting morning out to a ‘Hey, you are back’ and a huge smile. It’s been such a long time of solitude and silent dinners staring at a wall that he fears growing accustomed to this, to having someone taking care of him. Seems there’s another thing Jimin fears, now.
Doesn’t help Jungkook is being so sweet, such a good company.
“So, you live here by yourself.” says Jungkook one evening to start up a conversation. It’s been another week, he’s been healing really fast, wolves genetics are something Jimin envies a lot.
“Hmm,” Jimin says as response, focused on cutting some meat while side-eyeing Jungkook slicing a carrot; the wolf insisted on helping but they have been trying to cook diner for two hours now, Jungkook sitting on a wooden stool as he’s still a bit weak, slowly moving his knife; he doesn’t look like the type who cooks often and Jimin is starting to lose patience. It’s getting late and he’s tired.
“All your life?”
Jimin sighs, resting his knife on the counter to turn to look at him, “Why are you always asking so many questions?”
“Why do you never answer them?”
Jimin sighs again, turning back to work to avoid those sparkly eyes that make his stomach flutter. He can’t allow himself to get attached to Jungkook.
“I don’t have to—“
“Yeah, I know, you made it clear.” grumbles Jungkook annoyed.
Jimin glances at him from the corner of his eye, surprised at the speed Jungkook is cutting the carrots now; so he had been being slow on purpose, the little shit. But he also notices a pout and a frown and Jimin sighs again.
“I’ve been alone for seven years,” says Jimin softly, frustrated at himself for giving in at Jungkook’s little pout. The wolf snaps his head at him at his voice, though, eyes big and sparkly now focused only on him. “but I’ve been living in the woods all my life.”
“With your family?” Jungkook goes back to cutting the carrots when Jimin signals him to, smiling softly to himself. He looks proud of himself, as if he had won something and Jimin thinks in some way he has now that Jimin has started to answer his questions. Usually their conversations are Jungkook asking questions and Jimin curtly replying. It’s not often he indulges the wolf’s curiosity but when he does Jungkook seems to brighten up, even if the information Jimin gives is little to nothing.
“Yes, both my parents.”
“They live somewhere else now?”
Jimin falls silent at that, not sure how to respond. It hurts, opening old wounds; he had locked those memories in a really dark and deep corner of his mind.
“What about you?” he asks instead, throwing all the veggies inside the pot alongside the meat. “You have a pack, right? Family waiting for you?”
Jungkook moves slowly towards the fire, placing the wooden stool there to sit comfortably while they wait for everything to be done. He looks comfy and warm, wearing one of Jimin’s dad sweaters. Jimin had tried them before but they would look a bit too big on him, but it fits Jungkook well, since Jungkook is taller and broader than his dad was.
“Yes,” says Jungkook staring at Jimin from across the fire, soft smile on his lips. “I have two moms and a little brother. They must be really worried about me now.”
“I’m sure they are…” mumbles Jimin, stirring the food inside the pot. “You will be healed in no time, if we are lucky maybe even before winter settles definitely.”
Jungkook only responds with a hum, focused on the boiling soup. Jimin takes the chance to look at him without constraint, allows himself to indulge in this little moment of calmness it has been created somehow.
Jungkook is handsome, with a strong jaw and fierce brows but at the same time his eyes look so gentle, so delicate; they hold stars that make Jimin feel. The way Jungkook looks at him sometimes makes Jimin feel a spark of life, like maybe he’s still alive after all these years of emptiness and solitude. That maybe he’s not alone in the world after all.
As if feeling his stare Jungkook suddenly looks back at him, making Jimin awkwardly cough and avert his gaze.
“Ca-can I ask you something?” he says, trying to avert the attention away from the fact he had been caught staring a bit starstruck.
“Uhm, sure,” says Jungkook, sounding a bit amused. Jimin blushes, hating himself for such a slip up. He shouldn’t be thinking this way, it’s dangerous to get attached to Jungkook.
“When I first found you in the forest you were scared of me, but now you seem pretty comfortable, like you don’t care at all.”
“Oh, well…” now it’s Jungkook’s turn to blush a little bit. The night grew cold, them both having curled around the fire while waiting for their soup has reddened their cheeks; Jimin thinks Jungkook looks adorable like this. He craves a hug from him, must be so warm.
“Well, first of all because you saved my life.” says Jungkook, snapping Jimin back to reality. For a second he doesn’t even remember what he had asked, so he dumbly nods while the words sink in. “You didn’t have any reason to do so, but you did anyways so I will forever be indebted to you for that.”
Jimin is about to respond, refuse completely have Jungkook obliged to do anything to pay for saving him. Despite how much it annoyed Jimin, how much the little voice inside his head still screams at him to make Jungkook leave soon, he knows he would do it again and again if he ever found the wolf injured.
“Also because you don’t smell like a threat.” mumbles Jungkook, shy. Jimin feels both offended and pleased at that because he can be dangerous too if he wants to, he has survived in the forest all these years alongside predators three times bigger than him, but Jungkook seeing him as a companion worth of trust makes his heart warm. “I mean, your smell is… How to say it— you remind me of a kind of berries that grow during summer near my pack grounds. They are pretty sweet but not in that overbearing way that fills your mouth and you can’t feel anything else but the flavour stays in your mouth for hours; it’s gentle and nice…”
Jimin thinks his face is about to burst, must be all red form how hard he’s blushing. Never once he thought he would get so flustered at such a compliment; because this was a compliment, right? Jungkook is smiling softly, like he’s pleased while reminiscing the flavour of those berries in his mouth; Would he think Jimin also tastes like those berries were he to take a bite?
Wow, that’s dangerous territory.
“What I’m trying to say is that your scent is stronger and spicier than any other human I’ve ever come across. Reminds me of the scent of other wolves, almost. I think that’s why I also trust you.”
“My mom was a wolf.” blurts out Jimin before he can think. His mind had been suddenly filled with images of Jungkook nipping at his neck, rumbling happily as the sweetness of berries filled his tongue and Jimin needed a way out of that. Too dangerous.
“What?”
“My mom was a wolf, like you.” responds dumbly Jimin, getting back to reality. Now that the words are out he feels a bit stupid, he shouldn’t be telling Jungkook this.
“But you are… You aren’t a wolf.”
Jimin chuckles slightly at Jungkook’s confused expression. The wolf lifts his nose up, sniffing the air as if trying to find hints to confirm what Jimin just revealed.
“I’m human, yes. I didn’t inherit much from my mother beside good instincts and a bit more of strength than an average human. Well, and a scent reminiscent of berries I guess.” he says, attempting to joke to lighten up the awkwardness he feels.
Jungkook stares at him silently, eyes roaming around Jimin’s face a little lost, a little in wonder. He probably has never come across someone like Jimin before.
“How… how did that happen?” asks Jungkook. Jimin’s eyes go to the boiling pot, feeling himself closing inside his shell. These are painful memories, stacked at the back of his mind that only come out during the darkest of nights, when no stars and no bright moon can see him cry himself to sleep.
But he’s given Jungkook this tiny peak at his life, at the real Jimin, so of course the wolf is curious. Jimin shouldn’t have opened his mouth, but now it’s done and if Jungkook trusts him with his life, maybe Jimin should trust him with this.
“My parents met in a human town. My mother and a few other wolves used to go there for trading furs, some prey, stuff like that; the humans didn’t like them much but it was beneficial for both parties so everyone was pretty civil about it.
“Dad fell in love the moment he saw my mother. Couldn’t blame him, she was gorgeous with black long hair and starry eyes—“ he pauses, briefly looking up at Jungkook. Stars in her eyes, just like Jungkook. Maybe it’s a wolf thing. “He tried to catch her attention, always waiting for her when they knew the wolves were coming, gift in hand to court her, as you wolves would say. And mom fell too, endeared by the human brave enough to not give a damn she was a wolf, from another world.”
Jimin stops, fumbling with his fingers; he feels a knot forming in his throat already, eyes stinging with tears. It’s been years but the pain is so deep and raw his wounds will never heal.
“The town didn’t like it but they didn’t act on it because they though it was just a small infatuation, that my dad would snap out of it one day or my mom will stop giving him attention… whatever— but then she got pregnant.”
Jimin inhales sharply, mentally preparing himself for what he’s about to say. Jungkook seems to be holding his breath as well, listening with rap attention but Jimin can’t bare to look at him now, so close to shedding some tears.
“So the town folks chased him away, didn’t want him to corrupt their town and much less a child born from such a union to taint their children. He sought refuge at my mother’s pack and although they were reluctant to accept a human they allowed it. They were not officially mated, but for my mom being away from him, specially while pregnant, would have secured her death and her pack didn’t want to waste a wolf’s life like that.
“I was born a month earlier than it was due, small and scrawny. That scared the elderly, I didn’t have a wolf scent either but since my dad was human they thought that maybe I would be a late bloomer. But years went by and I smelled much more human, didn’t show any traits that would hint I was a wolf still in development; they thought it was a bad omen, that their goddess was mad because I was the fruit of a union between wolf and human and that they would be punished for allowing it to happen. So when I was around seven they tried to banish us—me and my dad only since they considered my mom one of them, but she would never abandon us, of course… so she ran away with us.”
Jimin takes a moment to breath, didn’t even notice he was getting so anxious as he kept talking, a tear finally falling free down his face.
“The pack tried to stop her but fighting a group of enraged wolves on your own and with a little kid on your back is not easy. Dad got hurt…” he keeps going, voice thick, “didn’t make it, the infection got him days later. Mom… I guess she kept going because she had me but every time I looked at her I saw her eyes fading away, those pretty stars in her eyes had completely went dark the moment my dad died.
“We built this little cabin together and she taught me how to survive. A few years went by, my mom always reminding me to keep fighting, teaching me everything she knew that would help me keep living on my own. I guess she knew she didn’t have much left and was preparing me for it; she kept falling ill, there were days she wouldn’t even get out of her bed until one day she… she didn’t have more strength left to keep fighting— or maybe she didn’t want to keep fighting anymore, I don’t know… I couldn’t do much, I tried everything but I couldn’t do anything for her, only watch as she faded away, as she consumed herself.”
Jimin is full on crying now, allowing himself to release everything that has been bottling up inside him for years; the anger, the pain, the guilt.
“I guess that’s why I helped you when I noticed what you were.” he says, hands trembling, body shaking. “I guess I wanted to do something for you since I couldn’t do anything for her.”
Suddenly, he’s embraced by a pair of strong arms, a hand guiding his head towards Jungkook’s neck. He’s hit with a strong smell of pine and wood despite his stuffed nose, scent so comforting and warm he can’t help but let it all out.
He squeezes his eyes shut and fists his hands on Jungkook’s sweater, pressing himself closer against him as his body shakes violently with the force of his sobs. And Jungkook just holds him, tightly and safely, rubbing his nose on the crown of his head, reasurringly. It’s surprisingly soothing, helps a lot to calm his frantic heart; he doesn’t feel so lonely anymore.
“There’s this belief in my pack that when one of us dies our Mother guides our souls up to the sky right next to her, so we can keep on watching and taking care of those we leave behind.” says Jungkook after a while, when Jimin seems to have relaxed a bit. Jungkook is holding his weight entirely, Jimin having leant on him completely, feeling so compelled and so protected that he selfishly doesn’t want to let go; Jungkook doesn’t seem to mind at all. “I’m sure your mother is up there too, watching over you and thankful for everything you did for her.”
“I— I m-miss her so mu-much” mumbles Jimin, breathing heavily as a new wave of tears falls down. Jungkook holds him tighter, pressing his nose in his hair.
“I’m sure she misses you too.”
Jimin keeps crying until his lungs burn and his eyes are so swollen he can’t even open them.
He didn’t even realise he had fallen asleep until he wakes up in his bed, surrounded by darkness. There’s warmth at his back, and when he turns around he finds Jungkook there, sleeping soundly with an arm thrown over Jimin’s waist. He briefly thinks that he should lean away from the wolf’s touch, but Jungkook exudes comfort, his breath soothing at the back of Jimin’s neck, his heartbeat the perfect lullaby to lull him to a peaceful slumber. So he turns back around, wiggles a bit closer to the wolf, who tightens his grip arounds his waist, and closes his eyes.
He gets the best sleep he has gotten in years.
-----------------
In the end winter got them trapped inside Jimin’s cabin. Jungkook could have left days ago, his wounds still not completely healed but well enough to allow him to get back to his pack. But Jimin had stopped trying to shove him away and kick him out of his house and Jungkook hadn’t tried to leave on his own either, just letting the days pass until the snowstorm hit strong enough to make it impossible for him to leave.
Jimin doesn’t want to admit it, but he’s relieved he won’t be spending this winter all by himself, specially after that talk, after he had opened his heart to the wolf. Something had shifted between them that night.
Now Jungkook sleeps with him in his bed every night, embraces him and holds him tight. He’s also gotten a bit braver with his touch, seems to not be able to not be touching Jimin in some way during the day. At first, it had been a bit overwhelming, and being trapped inside such a small cabin didn’t play in Jimin’s favour when he tried to keep some distance. But Jimin is not complaining now, having grown accustomed to it. Jungkook’s hands are big, feel comforting, and every time the wolf splays his hand at the small of his back Jimin feels heat spread within his body. But it’s the kind of heat that makes him feel joyous, happy; has never felt this euphoric in his entire life.
It doesn’t really come as a surprise for him when one night hands wander a bit farther than usual and lips find each other.
Jimin is not sure who initiated it, just knows that Jungkook’s lips feel perfect on his, and that his hands, although a bit rough, feel incredibly nice caressing his bare skin.
They kiss and touch and in between those clothes get discarded and words of endearment are spoken. Jungkook is sweet, takes his time in opening Jimin for him, gentle fingers finding the right spots to make Jimin moan out loud in pleasure. And when Jungkook finally enters him it’s an entire experience on its own; Jungkook is bigger than his fingers were, so it hurts, but the wolf keeps pestering kisses alongside the column of Jimin’s neck, keeps whispering beautiful words that make Jimin’s heart soar in happiness and at some point the pain subsides and only pleasure is felt, moaning loudly for his wolf to let him now how much he likes it, clutching at his back with force wanting this moment to never stop, for Jungkook to never leave.
Jungkook finds him that same night sitting near the window looking up at the sky.
The wolf lifts the blanket Jimin was wrapping himself with to sneak his way inside, embracing him from behind. Jimin leans back, resting his weight completely on Jungkook, knowing he will support him with no problem.
“What are you doing here all by yourself?” asks Jungkook, leaving a trail of kisses on Jimin’s neck. “You gonna be cold.”
Yes, Jimin is a bit cold without Jungkook’s heat. He had started regretting sitting there naked with only a blanket as a protection for the coldness but he had stirred awake and couldn’t fall asleep anymore.
“I was thinking about what you told me that day,” says Jimin softly, not wanting to disrupt the quietness of the night. “about the souls of wolves being up there in the sky with the Moon.”
Jungkook hums, tightening his arms around Jimin’s body. He’s thankful Jungkook had gotten up too, his body temperature is higher, sure, but Jimin feels warm for another entire reason.
“It gives me a bit of peace to think she’s up there with her kind, resting peacefully after everything she went through.”
“Must be the happy up there,” agrees Jungkook, pressing his nose on Jimin’s temple, nuzzling gently.
Jimin smiles, heart full because of the affection.
“Wish dad was up there as well with her,” he mumbles, reaching up to lock his fingers on Jungkook’s hair. “Sometimes I think they were true soulmates.”
“Then Mother has probably made them meet. She’s a huge fan of love stories, you know?” says Jungkook with a chuckle.
“What?” Jimin giggles, turning his head to the side to see Jungkook properly.
“Our mother thrives of love, she made sure to create a soulmate for each one of us, that’s why we wolves mate for life” explains Jungkook with a smile. Jimin stares at him a bit awed, getting lost in the stars in his eyes; he’s beautiful. “If your parents were soulmates, Mother must have helped them meet in the afterlife. They are probably up there together watching over you.”
“Can a human and a wolf be soulmates?”
“Yes, love knows no boundaries.” says Jungkook before leaning down to peck Jimin’s nose.
Jimin thinks of his mother’s pack, how they treated him and his parents because they fell in love.
“Not all packs are the same, I guess” says Jungkook after a moment, as if reading his thoughts. “My pack likes to think of our Mother as an entity of love and kindness. Our stories tell She felt really alone up there in the sky, surrounded by the darkness of the night, but then, after millennia of being on her own, a wolf started to sing to her,” Jungkook looks up at the sky, smiling at the crescent moon, “It’s said the wolf sang the most beautiful melodies to her and Mother would visit every night to just hear him. During the full moon is when She is the most powerful, so the story says She came down from the sky to be able to hear the wolf sing closer, and when Mother touched him in the head as gratitude for his songs he transformed into a man; her powers allowed him to transform whenever he wanted so they could be together every time She came to visit. They fell in love and from that bound of love we wolves were created. That’s why She allows us to stay alongside her when we die, to be with her children for the rest of the eternity.”
“That’s beautiful” mumbles Jimin, feeling a bit sleepy again. Junkook’s gentle voice and heat are making his body relax.
“I’m sure some wolves and packs have forgotten about this story, or tell it in different ways,” says Jungkook softly, hand caressing up and down Jimin’s arm. Jimin closes his eyes, feeling too close to dreamland. “I guess that’s why some forget our Mother would never hurt her children regardless of who they love.”
Jimin opens his eyes again, staring up at the sky, at the Moon. He has never believed in deities but he likes the story Jungkook is telling him; so he closes his eyes, leaning back completely on Jungkook’s chest and internally thanks the Moon for making his parents meet and experience pure love. On the last seconds of consciousness before falling asleep, he also thanks her for making him experience love.
-----------------
“The snow is melting.”
Jimin looks up from the fur he was sewing to Jungkook, then back out the window the wolf is staring from.
It’s been a total of three months since he met Jungkook in the woods. It’s still cold but the snow is melting indeed, preparing already for spring. Jimin gulps nervously, not liking what that means.
Jungkook looks back at him briefly before going back to look out the window. Jimin knows him well enough by now to notice there’s something he wants to say but doesn’t dare to.
“You must miss your pack,” says Jimin and when Jungkook snaps his head back at him again with big eyes, Jimin knows he guessed correctly what was on the wolf’s mind.
Jungkook opens his mouth but closes it again, unsure of what to say. Jimin doesn’t blame him; both knew this was going to happen sooner or later, but Jimin selfishly thought Jungkook would want to stay longer.
“I do, yeah,” admits Jungkook finally. Jimin nods, focusing back on the furs in his lap.
“After all this time, your family must be worried sick, probably even thought you are dead.”
He hears Jungkook approach him, sighing a bit in relief when the wolf sits next to him at the small fire they use to cook; Jimin has noticed he can pin point Jungkook’s scent easily, it relaxes him when he can feel him closer like this.
“I should…go back, right?” says Jungkook staring down at his hands. Jimin takes a look at him, sees the sadness in his eyes and feels awful; Junkook doesn’t want to leave, but he also misses his family.
“We both knew this would happen.” mumbles Jimin, “your wounds have been healed for weeks.”
Jungkook stays silent, blinking slowly and lost in thought. Jimin wants to desperately scream at him to not leave, to stay here forever and be together for an eternity. Jungkook had a life before him, though, a pack, a family, maybe even a lover; it would be so selfish of Jimin to ask him to stay here, to make him chose between his family and him.
“You could come with me.”
“What?”
“Come with me” says Jungkook determined, eyes wide with hope. Jimin’s jaw tightens to prevent himself from agreeing immediately.
“I can’t.” he says with a jerk of his head, there’s a knot forming in his throat, “your pack—“
“They would accept you.” interrupts Jungkook eagerly. The wolf takes Jimin’s hands in his and squeezes lightly, “Remember what I told you? The story of the Moon and the wolf, what we believe in…”
“Yeah, but it was just that Jungkook, a story.” replies Jimin, eyes already stinging with tears. He sees something break in Jungkook’s own shiny eyes, his hope getting crushed. “It was just a tale, the reality is different, so much harsher. The moment they see me, what I am, they will want nothing to do with me.”
“You are a wolf too,” says Jungkook, pulling Jimin’s hands to himself when Jimin tries to move away. The look of pain is too much for Jimin to see, he doesn’t want to see someone he loves suffer because of him.
“I’m not,” he mumbles, “I’m something in between and neither at the same time. I don’t fit in your world.”
“Jimin…”
“No, I can’t— I can’t do that to you, Jungkook.” says Jimin, now shaking his head with fervour. “I don’t want you to experience what my parents had to go through; I can’t make you chose between me and your family, either.”
“You are making the decision for me.” He watches a tear fall from Jungkook’s eye, wishes to lean forward and kiss his pain away, stroke his hair until he rumbles in satisfaction and they both fall asleep in their bed for the rest of the day. That would only delay the inevitable.
“You have to go back to them and live your life, be happy.” Jimin tries to smile at him but he’s sure he doesn’t look convincing at all with all the crying he’s doing. Jungkook’s hurt expression tells him that much. “It’s the best decision, trust me.”
Jungkook lets go of his hands and Jimin wants to pull him back immediately, hug him, kiss him; but he just watches as Jungkook grabs a jacket and goes towards the door.
“I will leave, then” he says when he’s reached the door, his back to Jimin, “tomorrow, with the sun rise.”
Jimin crumbles down when Jungkook closes the door behind him, feeling his heart break into a million pieces. It’s the best decision, he keeps repeating to himself through his tears, the best they can do to avoid pain and suffering.
But if it is, then why does Jimin feel like he’s suffocating, as if a part of his heart is being ripped out raw from his chest?
As said, Jungkook gets ready to leave the next morning.
Jimin doesn’t know what to say. Actually, they hadn’t spoken much since their conversation the day before and it pains Jimin immensely to think they will part ways in this state. He doesn’t want Jungkook to hate him.
“You sure you don’t want me to pack some food or something?” asks Jimin hugging himself. This early in the morning the air is cold and the woods are silent, as if also sad because of Jungkook’s departure.
“Yes, don’t worry,” replies Jungkook, already shrugging off his jacket. “I will travel in wolf form, it’s much more faster this way, so I will just hunt if I need to.”
Jimin nods, grabbing Jungkook jacket and sweater when the wolf offers them to him. Jungkook’s scent hits his nose and he sighs while hugging the clothes closer to his chest; he will miss him so much.
Jungkook is about to take off his pants when stops to stare at Jimin. There’s hesitation in his expression before Jungkook finally moves, sneaks his arm around Jimin’s waist and hugs him closer to him, pressing his nose in Jimin’s hair, inhaling sharply.
Jimin gives in easily, diving directly for Jungkook’s neck. He had found the wolf is a bit sensitive there, getting chills whenever Jimin would press a kiss or rub his nose affectionally.
They stay like that for a moment, just breathing each other in, enjoying the quietness and the brief moment of peace before reality crushes their world.
Jungkook leans back to stare at him before cupping his face and leaning back in to press a soft kiss on Jimin’s lips.
“I will miss you,” mumbles Jungkook against his lips, “I love you.”
That makes Jimin gasp, tears quickly forming in his eyes. He opens his mouth to say something but Jungkook interrupts him with another kiss, a bit longer this time, a bit more desperate.
When they part, Jungkook immediately detangles himself from Jimin, quickly discarding the rest of his clothes to transform. Jimin doesn’t get the chance to say anything, before he can do anything there’s a huge platinum wolf right in front of him.
The beast is huge, tall and intimidating but oh, so beautiful Jimin can’t take his eyes away from him, from his beautiful wolf.
Jungkook butts his head against Jimin’s chest, rumbling and whining softly. The sound is sad, it breaks Jimin a little bit more as the wolf keeps pressing his head against him; it almost feels like he’s pleading Jimin to reconsider. He hugs his head, allowing his tears wet the beautiful grey fur.
“Take care, Jungkook.” he says, kissing in between Jungkook’s pretty starry eyes, “I will miss you too.”
I love you too, he wants to say, but he doesn’t dare to.
And with much hesitation and a lot of willpower he pushes the wolf’s head away gently, taking a step back from the wolf.
“Go.” he says when Jungkook doesn’t move, grabbing the clothes from the floor before taking another step back. “Go!”
Jungkook releases a louder whine as a response but decides to finally turn around, immediately breaking into a run; he’s so fast Jimin loses sight of him in between the trees seconds later.
And Just like that Jungkook is gone.
The realisation hits him harder than he thought, despite being prepared for it. The pain of his heart is too much for him to bare, so he curls on the floor hugging Jungkook’s clothes to his chest and nose buried within them, sobbing uncontrollably.
He knows this was the best decision, Jungkook had to go back to his family but that doesn’t mean it hurts any less.
-----------------
Jimin is starving and sweating, one of the worst combinations. The sun is really high in the sky, which means he shouldn’t have gone that far to hunt prey, the trek back home is being insufferable now that Summer is quickly approaching.
After another hour of sweating under the sun he finally gets home, anticipating the bath with cold water and the meal he had prepared before leaving awaiting for him.
He stops, though, when he notices there’s someone near his cabin. A man, for what he can see, sitting on the trunk he put there himself ages ago next to the fire pit, so he could sit there while watching the stars during a summer night.
The stranger has not noticed him, it seems, his back towards Jimin; so he uses that to his advantage, throwing his prey on the floor and getting a hold of his axe. It’s not common to see thieves around where he lives, they like hiding in the mountains but they never wander this deep into the woods if they don’t want to be eaten by a bear. This one chose to the wrong place to hide.
He moves silently, approaching slowly but with sure steps, arm ready to throw his axe but then the man turns around and Jimin feels the air leave his lungs.
“Jungkook?”
Jungkook smiles, one of those side smiles that make him look mischievous and his dimples come to life.
“Hey,” he says while standing up. He’s wearing only a pair of pants that Jimin notices are his; he probably came here in wolf form and grabbed some of the clothes Jimin had hanging outside under the sun to dry. It’s a bit ridiculous, though, those pants look a bit too small on his broad body and Jimin giggles at the sight.
“Why are you laughing?” says Jungkook, wide grin on his face and Jimin can’t help but let another chuckle leave his mouth; it’s a weird sound though, laughing at the same time he’s crying.
“You look ridiculous with those on,” says Jimin, lifting his hand to rub at his nose, sniffing loudly; he can’t contain his tears.
“Come here, you.”
Jimin doesn’t hesitate, drops the axe and runs towards Jungkook, who is more than ready to catch him. The wolf lifts him up, arms supporting Jimin’s weight from under his legs as Jimin embraces his neck tightly and locks his legs around his waist, crying like a little kid who just woke up from a horrible nightmare.
Despite his sobs and stuffy nose, Jimin feels like he can breath again, with Jungkook’s scent surrounding him, his arms holding him tight and his sweet voice whispering beautiful words of endearment right in his ear.
“I missed you,” says Jungkook. His voice sounds thick, he’s crying too, so Jimin hugs him even tighter, rubbing his nose on the crack of his neck, hoping to comfort his beautiful wolf.
“I missed you too.”
Jungkook twirls them around, both of them giggling happily through their tears of happiness.
“Why are you here?” asks Jimin when Jungkook stops spinning. The wolf sits on the trunk with Jimin still in his arms, making him sit on his lap; seem he’s planning on never letting him go.
“I came back for you.” he says, bumping his nose with Jimin’s, “and before you say anything I want you to know that I’ve talked with my pack and they would love to accept you.”
“Wait, what?”
“What you heard,” Jungkook can’t contain his smile, so wide Jimin is feeling one stretching his own lips also, “You are coming with me.”
“Jungkook…”
“Jimn, listen to me,” Jungkok cups Jimin’s face to make sure they are looking at each other, to make sure Jimin is looking directly at his eyes so he can see his sincerity, “I love you, I have no doubts you are the one Mother made for me and there’s no way I will abandon you. If you want me, I’m all yours forever.”
Jungkok thumbs away the tears tenderly, holding his face with so much adoration.
“I love you too,” mumbles Jimin, moving to hold Jungkook’s face between his hands as well, “I love you so much.”
“Then come with me, to be part of my pack and my family,” Jungkook says, resting their foreheads together, another tear falling down his face,“They accept you, I made sure of it. I even build us a house— that’s why it took me longer to come back for you, I wanted to give you everything you’ve ever wanted. There’s a bathroom with an enormous basin for you to bath with warm water every night, and a huge kitchen where I will cook all the food you want and also a garden where you will be able to grow vegetables— a variety of them not only carrots and turnips and—“
Jimin doesn’t let him finish, shuts him up with a kiss, a really messy one, though, with both of them crying like idiots, but Jimin doesn’t care, not when he’s got Jungkook in his arms.
“Ok, ok— I will go with you,” he says smiling broadly as Jungkook sighs with relief, pressing him closer to him.
Jungkook suddenly lifts him up while kissing up his neck, Jimin caressing his wolf’s hair with adoration.
“Where are we going?” giggles Jimin, he’s so happy he could burst.
“I’m gonna make love to you all day, until the only thing you can do is moan my name,” says Jungkook and Jimin think it’s unfair how he can say such things and make it sound so adoringly. It makes Jimin’s hear soar with love.
And oh, does Jimin moan for the rest of day and night.
It’s two days later that they leave towards Jungkook’s pack. When Jimin looks back to his old home, a little part of him doesn’t want to leave, too many memories inside those walls, but then Jungkook grabs his hand and smiles down at Jimin, and just staring at his beautiful starry eyes is enough to know they will be fine; Jimin has found his new home, and the stars will follow wherever he goes.