Chapter Text
God, she’s annoying. Having sat there many, many times watching her during briefings, Spencer Reid knows she only pays attention 63.4% of the time. And while he couldn’t see her when the team gave this last profile, chances are she wasn’t paying attention. So really it’s only natural for him to try and catch her up on the case. And once again, Y/L/N is completely disregarding everything he’s saying, listening to her music and bopping her head along to some obnoxious rock song. Everything about this girl is completely aggravating to him.
He’s not exactly sure why he dislikes her so deeply, but for some reason she’s intensely dislikable. He can barely see any redeeming traits in her. She’s loud and reckless and obnoxious and honestly he’s not even sure how she managed to get into the BAU seeing as she’s basically the same age he is. The worst part of it is that Gideon and Hotch seem to think that they’ll get over their obvious dislike of each other by spending time together. It’s a ludicrous plan.
Because they won’t.
“Just in case you weren’t paying attention, the UNSUB is a white male in his thirties or forties and likely lives alone in a remote area, hence us going eighty four miles out of the city limits to talk to the suspect, even if he’s not a top priority.” Spencer recites, before looking over at her face. She’s not listened to a word he’s said, once again.
“Are you even listening to what I’m saying? You know it’s actually really important about the case and you’re, you’re doing what exactly?”
She’s so frustrating. And clearly in some sort of daydream; Spencer is surprised they’ve not crashed yet when he considers her complete disregard for any sort of road based regulations.
“Reid, I’m driving, of course I’m not listening to your shit. Besides, I also paid attention to the briefing. This guy is slightly lower down on our suspect list but high enough to deserve a visit. Can we have quiet time now, baby genius?” She whines, turning up what he considers to be her stupid music.
He sighs at her use of ‘baby genius’. She’s barely older than him, meaning that her silly little nickname makes zero sense. Just because she paid attention for once in her very short time at the BAU, it does not comfort him to potentially meet with an UNSUB with her as back up.
“But don’t you think we should talk about the case? I mean you’re new to working with our team, and you’re the same age as me, so you clearly don’t have that much experience in the field either. I just think that I would feel more reassured if you actually paid attention to something outside of your silly little daydreams so that if this Hank Roberts is actually the killer then you’ll actually be of some use.” He knows she gets defensive over her placement at the BAU, being so young and inexperienced and very likely having got the job via nepotism, so throwing that remark in there is bound to aggravate her.
Good. If she’s going to spend her time annoying him, then he gets to annoy her too.
What he didn’t expect, was for her to switch off the radio and swerve off the road in a manner that scared the shit out of him. Being in a car with her felt as deadly as facing down an UNSUB.
She goes off on him, very much upset. He didn’t expect his insinuations to cut so deep; clearly her inexperience at the BAU is very much a sore topic for her.
There’s some satisfaction in knowing he’s ruined her day. Just a little bit. But her pulling over to argue with him seems to be an overreaction to what he considers pointing out the truth. Once again, she's proved her recklessness to him.
“I actually have used a gun in the field before, Y/L/N. Why don’t you keep driving so we can actually get to the suspect’s house before sundown, or are you completely incompetent?” He really cannot stand her insufferable attitude.
“Go fuck yourself, Spencer Reid.” A classic response from her.
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While the impulsive and reckless plan to retrieve the victim from Roberts -- who actually did turn out to be the UNSUB despite the original assessments -- worked, her impulsivity could have created a dangerous situation for all involved. Spencer might have had a slight involvement in the creation of said plan, but in his mind purely because his hand was forced in this situation. Not by choice.
So, he’s not surprised to find that Hotch is also annoyed at how recklessly she'd handled the situation. She mentioned that he sounded vexed at how the situation played out, but he wasn’t expecting both of them to be pulled over for a lecture. Generally, he’s considered well regarded by his superiors and coworkers, even if they don’t exactly understand him all the time, or tease him for his young age and lack of social skills. Therefore, being scolded by Hotch was a relatively new experience and not one he enjoyed. To make it worse, he didn’t even want to be involved in her stupid little plan in the first place.
“It was Y/L/N’s idea, Hotch. She was determined to get in there even before we had confirmed proof Marcy was in there, and basically forced me to follow along with her plan.” He informs Hotch matter of factly before she could come up with some kind of story that placed the blame on both of them. If she got in trouble for her behaviour then so be it. To see her in trouble would be incredibly satisfying.
Leaving her to deal with Hotch’s wrath, Spencer heads over to Gideon to discuss the case with him.
“I don’t understand how we missed that Williams was the UNSUB, after all he was third on our list of suspects and really had a far lower likelihood of kidnapping those girls than the other two men.” He questions, seeing out of the corner of his eye that Y/L/N was still being lectured by Hotch seven feet away.
“The profile is just a tool; sometimes we miss things. And sometimes, we just get lucky.” Gideon says sagely, and the two start to walk towards the SUV’s, ready to head home.
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The week after the case, He notes that Y/L/N had been pulled into Hotch and Gideon’s respective offices at least once, and judging by the looks on her face when she left, there was a 98.9% probability that she was being lectured about her behaviour in the field.
He’s not sure what department she worked in prior to the BAU, but he did wonder if they had to reprimand her for the same attitudes towards her field work there too.
She spends the entire week with a stony look on her face, keeping her head down and focusing on her paperwork. This worked well for him; he got a week of peace and quiet without having to hear her annoying voice distracting everyone from their work. He doesn’t understand how anyone can put up with her incessant prattling on about useless information; he doubts no one gets anything important from her laughing about the latest celebrity gossip or her weekend shenanigans.
By Friday, he was ready for a weekend of reading and perhaps doing some research for a new paper he was considering writing. Completely distracted by theorems and statistics, he heads towards the only open elevator, only noticing as he entered through the doors that she was the only other occupant.
Fantastic.
He couldn’t bare standing there in silence. It was deafening, and her scowling at him wasn’t making the situation better. He goes to say something, a statistic about elevator rides, just to make some kind of conversation and hopefully make the ride seem faster. Not that conversation could speed up an elevator but it at least creates an illusion. However, before he could get any words out, she's back to her obnoxious self. So much for an entire week of reprieve from her annoying attitude.
“Don’t speak to me, Reid. Unless you’re going to apologise for the massive amount of shit you got me into with Hotch and Gideon, don’t speak.” She retorts and he finds myself getting annoyed at her. In his mind, he wasn't to blame for her idiocy and while he did perhaps leave her to take the heat alone, she only would have done the same to him.
“Why would i apologise for informing Hotch of your reckless behaviour, Y/L/N? I only assisted you in taking down the UNSUB because if I hadn’t have stepped in, you’d have only gone and gotten yourself killed. The rest of the team should know that you’re dangerous to work with.” He responds, because it’s true; she’s an absolute menace and awful to be partnered with.
Instead of saying anything else, she vacates the elevator on Garcia’s floor, giving him the rest of the elevator ride to think in peace.
He decides he will write that paper this weekend. It will be something far more interesting than dealing with her.
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Coffee. He needs coffee. And yet, there was none in his apartment. A common occurrence. Sighing, he grabs a jacket and heads out into the early morning -- far too early to be heading to the store -- to buy a lot of coffee. What can he say? Caffeine is the only thing that keeps him going sometimes and is far healthier and less addictive than other stimulants.
As he returns, successful in his mission to obtain a large amount of caffeinated goods, he heads towards the elevator. The early morning meant that likely he wouldn’t have to interact with any of his neighbours. And that, that was a very good thing. She had moved into the building around the same time she started at the BAU. He is 87.2% sure that she hasn’t realised that they live in the same building. He’s personally dreading the moment he has to interact with her outside of work.
“Could you hold the lift?” A voice croaks out. It sounds somewhat familiar, so he holds the doors open to let them in. As the disheveled woman makes her way into the elevator, horror dawns upon him. This is finally the day he has to see her around the building.
Of course, being her self-absorbed self, she turns to him and asks, “Are you stalking me?”
A ridiculous question. One; he work for the FBI, so it’s rather improbable that he would be a criminal in my spare time. Two; if he were to stalk anyone -- which he wouldn’t do -- it definitely would not be the greatest annoyance in his life.
She looks awful, clearly coming home after a night of drinking. Her normally perfect hair is knotted into some kind of messy bun and her eye make up smudged. And she wasn’t even wearing shoes.
“Y/N, don’t be ridiculous. I live here. You moved in three months ago and you live in the apartment above mine. Don’t you pay attention to anything outside of yourself?” Just as he’d figured; she hadn’t even realised that they lived in the same building. How embarrassing for her silly little self absorbed mind.
“Jesus Christ, can’t I ever escape you? What would it take for you to move out and get out of my life completely?” She moans, and he's almost surprised she’s even able to form words and sentences after the kind of night it seems she had. Well, perhaps it’s unsurprising given her intolerable nature.
“I could ask the same of you, Y/L/N. Stay away from me.” He’s really not caffeinated enough to deal with her bullshit this early in the day.
