Chapter Text
Chapter 1: Rain
Storms have been plaguing the village for months, and while all of the villagers complain of ruined crops I have been basking in joy. I love the rain, and everything that comes along with these storms. There are no chores to be done during a rain, no one walks the streets, no one visits, and I am left alone with my thoughts. Normally I don't have a second to myself, I can not enjoy a walk without interruption and by the time night rolls around I am so drained from daily work that I’m too tired to even gaze up at the stars. So, a heavy rain meant I could finally have a moment to myself.
Today a storm rolled around that’s quite heavier than the previous ones we’ve seen this month, so I haven’t left my hut all day, much to my liking. It’s hard not to admire the beauty of the rain, it’s ever so deceiving just like My Lord. My Sesshomaru.
Rain makes such noise upon roofs, and it falls from the sky looking like shards of diamond. Rain, although beautiful like a diamond, hits the ground turning into a puddle, a puddle of water that one could easily run their hands through, a delicate liquid. Lord Sesshomaru was like the rain in many ways, he seemed one way but really he was something completely different.
***
RIN’S POV
As I looked up at the sky through the window of my hut, I could only think of Sesshomaru. The one downside to these storms was that the only thing I could think about was him, and how I longed to be at his side again traveling the lands, and poking fun at Jaken. When Lord Sesshomaru first dropped me off in this village a few years ago, I felt a betrayal that I had never felt in my life. Even though time has passed I still feel the betrayal so deeply, and the worst part was I would never understand why he did it. It took a long time to accept the reality that he wasn’t going to come back for me, and that my home was here now, a place without him. We went from always being by one another’s side to me rarely seeing him, only a few times a year when he comes to bring me an extravagant present. He did seem to frequent the village more often in the beginning, but as the years went on the visits slowed, causing my heart to break even more. I searched my heart trying to understand why I felt such pain being away from him, and I yearned for my feelings of despair to disappear. After every visit the aching only became worse, and eventually the answer to my suffering was clear. I had fallen in love with him, somewhere along the way my affection for him had grown into something much deeper than friendship. I kept combing over our visits, trying to pinpoint when that had happened, but I couldn’t find one particular day or time. All I knew was that it had happened. Once the realization of that sunk in, I quickly tucked those feelings away. My instincts immediately told me to hide them. I couldn’t imagine that he’d feel the same towards me, and I didn’t want to lose him, my dearest and best friend. So here I sit, spending my moments alone feeling so angry towards him that my anger almost rivals my love for him. I do mentally kick myself for having these thoughts, because I know it’s selfish to expect him to feel what I feel. I owe him everything, my very life, and he owes me nothing. Lord Sesshomaru did more than he ever had to for me, and now that I am a woman it is up to me to live a life of a normal one. It is up to me to marry and bare children, like a normal human woman. Even if living a normal human life means I can't be with him. I have to try to move on, because I know that he could never allow himself to be with me, even if by some small chance it was what he wanted. After all, I am only human, nothing more than a comrade, one he has no idea has such silly Fantasies.
“Rin”
I could barely hear it, but he had called out to me interrupting my thoughts. Looking through my window I squinted, and there he was, standing in the rain as if there were none at all. I hadn’t seen him in so long, but it was very much like him to show up just when he was occupying the entirety of my thoughts, almost like he could read my mind. I walked from my window to peek out of the flap that was my door. "Lord Sesshomaru, please come in!” I shouted. He didn't say a word, but walked gracefully in my direction. When he entered my mostly bare hut, I quickly began to start a fire. He sat down Indian style, still in silence. I knew I would be the one to have to start a conversation, as usual, but even so I was still glad to see him. "What brings you by, Lord Sesshomaru? It's late out, you must have expected me to be asleep by now."
He responded to me, his beautiful face never changing expression. "I have seen you staying up late much of this month, watching the rain out of your window. I knew you would be awake."
I sat down across from him, the fire now burning strong between us. "Lord Sesshomaru you shouldn’t spy, it is most intrusive." I giggled. It made me feel good to know that he still kept an eye on me, even when I didn’t know it. It gave me hope that I wasn’t completely forgotten. The corner of his lip slightly twitched, and I knew he had found what I said humorous. I gazed upon his face and I so longed to know what he was truly thinking, and what the purpose of these random visits were. He could have dropped me off here in the village and not bothered with me further, but he has spent almost seven years popping in and out of my life at his will. All of the visits from the last few years have been like this, silent, unless I force a conversation, and it burns me to the very core. Trying to figure him out burned. For some reason, on this rainy night, I could no longer take the burning. Those feelings I tucked away were threatening to break free of their gage. It's never been in my nature to hold back, unless dealing with him, only with him did I restrain myself. I’ve been restraining myself for years. Not on this night though, I needed answers so that my pain could subside.
"Lord Sesshomaru I want to talk to you." I whispered.
His eyes locked with mine, and he nodded. "Rin you may always speak in my presence."
I slightly smiled looking away from his gaze. "No that is not what I mean, I want to talk to you about important things. Specific things. Things we have never spoken of, if not but only in silence. Please give me this great honor and answer my questions, open your heart to me this once. Truly let me know what has been going on in your mind since that faithful day I found you in the forest when I was a child." I looked back at him, biting my lip nervously.
Sesshomaru looked away, briefly closing his eyes before locking eyes with me again. "Rin stop being silly."
My face became red with embarrassment, but my determination only grew. "Please do not treat me as a child a moment longer, I am a woman now. I know it is I who owe’s you my life, but please give me this honor for the undying loyalty I have shown to you my Lord. Please I beg you, because I can't go on like this any longer!" I shouted.
His eyes widened and he looked upon me with a solemn expression, almost as if he thought he was about to lose something. He was quiet for what seemed like an eternity, and I was beginning to think he would never speak. Finally though, he spoke. "I will answer whatever it is you want to know." For some reason, In that moment, I too felt like I may be losing something.