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Look, I didn't mean for this to happen. I didn't plan anything. I didn't even think about the consequences when I started playing along. But of course, now I've dug myself into a real big hole. My knuckles are white from gripping the laundry sink while I'm staring at the soiled underwear that I just had to scrub clean by hand. There was no way I was putting them in the wash as they were. Fuck no. That would be a little hard to explain to mum.
I pick up the dripping underwear and wring them out. Suds trickle down the drain, and I grimace at the squelch the fabric makes. I gotta hang these up to dry… but I can’t be bothered at the moment. What’s more prominently on my mind is that I just… ugh, I hate to admit it.
I just came in my underwear in the presence of my best friend.
Who the fuck even does that?
I mean, I could easily pass it off by saying ‘it’s a long story’, but truthfully it wasn’t. The events leading up to it only started this afternoon, with Okuyasu asking a stupid question after school.
“Oi, Josuke… how d’you think gay people do it ?”
I nearly spat tapioca in his face. “What the fuck got you thinking about that, dude?”
His ears tinged scarlet, the hand around his milk tea gesturing like a shrug. “Well, I dunno. It’s not like they can do the dirty like what you do with a girl though, right? So what do they even do in bed?”
“I don’t know, man,” I laughed, “what do you do in bed?”
“Hey, I ain’t gay!”
“Well where’s ya girlfriend, then?”
“Where’s your girlfriend, Josuke?”
With that, I shoved him hard, and he shoved me back, and we giggled… and then it was quiet for an uncomfortably long time. We’d almost reached my block. My hand was freezing from holding the milk tea for so long.
“But really, dude,” Okuyasu said quietly, almost timidly. “I wanna know… if there’s no girl involved, what are they supposed ta do?”
“I dunno,” I huffed. “Probably just touch each other’s dicks.”
“But what about putting it in? Like… where do they put it, for like, actual sex?”
I couldn’t believe I was explaining gay sex to such an airhead who couldn’t figure it out himself.
“In their butt, dummy.”
“In their butt ?”
“Yes, dude. In their butt.”
“...You ain’t kidding?”
“No, I’m not. They do it with their butthole.”
Okuyasu was frozen on the porch just outside the front door, which I held open for him. “I mean,” he said slowly, as the cogs churned in his head, “I kinda get it… but wouldn’t that be uncomfortable? Like a reverse shit, right?”
“I dunno, man!” I rolled my eyes, exasperated and holding in the snort from the latter sentence. “I’ve never even dated anyone, so I can’t really tell you much on this subject. Why don’t we just go finish our math homework before you forget about it again and Nakayama-sensei gets you in trouble for the fourth day in a row?”
Okuyasu sprung into the house with the realisation. “Shit, okay. But ya gotta help me with the trigonometry stuff… you know I never know what I’m doing with stupid triangles.”
So then we were sitting at the dining table with our school shit sprawled all over the place, and I kept having to remind him how ‘sine is opposite over hypotenuse’, and ‘if you don’t finish, Nakayama-sensei is gonna give you detention’. But he was heaps more restless than usual and took a hell of a long time to finish — he was barely halfway through the exercise when I finished both the math exercise and my short history essay. I could tell something was bugging him.
“Are you good, man?” I asked, twirling a pen.
“Yeah, I’m fine,” he waved me off, feigning turning his head back down to his work. But after a few seconds, he sighed defeatedly. “I just can’t stop thinking… like, with girls, you can do other things to make them feel good, like touch their boobs, right?”
I drop my pen on the floor. “Dude, I thought we were over this!”
“I know, I know, and I’m sorry… I can’t stop thinking about it!” Okuyasu whined. “Like, how does a guy make another guy feel like that? They don’t have the same parts as a girl… I can’t figure it out!”
“Well, maybe it’s just a completely different kind of sex,” I said, leaning my chin on my hand. “Maybe it’s like apples and oranges — maybe you just can’t compare it.”
I remember how amusing it was to see Okuyasu’s face screwed up in such confusion. “But… huh?”
“Let’s play Mortal Kombat . We can do the homework later,” I tried to interrupt, but was completely unsuccessful.
“So if a girl has boobs, a guy only has… nipples? But can they feel good? Should I try and test it?”
“Do what you want, bro, d’you wanna play Kombat or not?”
“Nah, I’m preoccupied,” he said, scratching his chin in contemplation.
I huff, a little frustrated. “So, whaddya wanna do, then?”
Okuyasu opened his mouth as if to speak, and then quickly shut it like a goldfish. “Nothing,” he resorted to. I knew he was lying.
“No, really, dude. Tell me.”
As soon as I saw him biting his lip and that red glow reappearing on his ears, I felt a strange throb in my chest.
“Uh… I wanna… experiment. I just wanna work out what it’s all about.”
“Uh-huh.”
“Can I experiment with you?”
I couldn’t have said I didn’t expect it. He had been infatuated all afternoon on the same subject. He couldn’t just accept the answers I’d given him, so of course he wanted to find out for himself. I was fine with that, because I was a little curious too. The thing that actually shocked me was how quickly we’d ended up sprawled in my bed, my shirt off, his fingertips grazing up my chest while his brows furrowed in concentration. I was surprised he hadn’t gone straight for my nipples — he was checking out everywhere else, too. My jaw, my neck, my collar, my sternum, my belly, even around my arms and down my sides. Some of his touches tickled, but I couldn’t bring myself to smirk. It was just so intense — Okuyasu was determined to find where it felt good. He searched around my biceps, changing the pressure of his fingers, using his palm to almost massage the skin. I would be the biggest liar in the world if I said it didn’t feel good.
I would be an even bigger liar if I said it didn’t turn me on.
“Shit, dude… I think you’re doing something there,” I groaned when he finally brushed one fingertip over a nipple. It was strange, because while the skin was sensitive, it wasn’t the nipple that felt good… it was the slight surge of warmth down my abdomen that came with it.
“What’s it like?” he asked, his face looming over me. I caught a whiff of his musky aftershave.
“I dunno… ‘s weird,” I murmured. He thumbed over that place again, firmer this time, and I’d definitely felt it in my groin by this point.
“This may sound super gross,” Okuyasu started, his fingers still moving over me, “but I feel like I should… uh, lick you or something.”
I shivered at the idea — but not in discomfort. Surely if his hands are this pleasant, his mouth will be even better, I thought. So I nodded, and… oh boy.
His tongue, running up from my navel to my right nipple, circling the bud, pressing firmly. My hips bucked into nothing on their own accord, and I felt Okuyasu’s satisfied smile on my skin. His lips wandering towards the other side, teeth gently biting down, tongue working the skin simultaneously, my nipples swollen, my face warm with every shock of pleasure I felt ripple towards my crotch. His hands snaked onto my waist, holding my hips firmly, and his teeth grazed my collar bone, up my neck, tongue on my Adam’s apple, and all I could think of was how embarrassingly, stupidly, painfully hard I’d become.
It was a total impulse when I reached for his shoulders and tugged him so I could kiss him.
He tensed up, but only for a moment. His lips opened up, and I tasted him for the first time. He still had a hint of sweet tapioca on his tongue. His lips were rough, but wide and plump and so easy to get lost in. The moan that escaped me was unable to be contained as he rolled a nipple between his fingers and snuck a hand down the back of my trousers, kneading at my ass. I couldn't believe I was really getting off like this.
I held him like a vice. His lips went back to my neck, but he was surer, firmer, and his teeth pressed into a tender spot that I hadn't noticed before. I almost cried out as he worked his teeth and tongue over the area, and his hand on my chest, the other hand now undoing my belt and fly. He did his best to shove my trousers part-way down single-handedly, leaving my boxers on. He leaned against me as he did so — resting his crotch against my thigh in the process. He was hard, too — not semi-hard. Hard .
And he leaned over and kissed me again, deep and frenzied, and combed his fingernails over my bare inner thigh. I almost couldn't take it anymore. He was everywhere, he was on me, and over me, and on my mouth and my thighs and in my stomach, tying knots in my gut. A tidal wave of pleasure erupted in me when his lips finally returned back to my nipples, and fuck .
I didn't even see it coming. I bucked up hard. I hugged him into me as I came, wave after wave, seeing stars. He kissed me through it, teeth against my collar bone, hands returned to grip reassuringly around my waist. He smiled at me when I finally let go — it was a smile of contentment.
He finally got the answer he wanted, right? I rub a hand over my face and sigh, facing my bedroom door. Okuyasu's still on the other side, waiting for me to come back after cleaning myself up. I wonder what he's thinking. Should I tell him the things that went through my mind as he did those things to me? Should I tell him how good he was, how I've never come untouched? Or should I tell him that we shouldn't do that again, as a precaution in case he wants to keep doing stuff like that?
Or should I get him off now?
… I can't lie, I'd like to see that.
But how would I say that? And what if he doesn't want to? I mean, he was hard… but maybe he'll look after himself? That would be disappointing. I do think it would be hot to see him come apart like that.
Eugh, is that a normal thought to be having about your best bro?
My hand clenches around my bedroom door knob. My brain stalls for a second, trying to figure out a way to confront Okuyasu about what just happened. I shut my eyes — inhale, exhale, inhale — and shove the door open before I can chicken out.
"Hey, Okuyasu, I—"
He's there on my bed where I left him. The first thing I notice is how his bottom lip has disappeared behind his teeth as he turns his head and looks me up and down. And then I see how hunched he is, bent over himself, back muscles taught. And then I see his hands, his one hand up his shirt and the other down on his…
Holy fuck.