Chapter Text
Everything had been so perfect between them. For the entire 4 years their relationship had been completely in sync. They were just right for each other. On a mental, emotional and physical level.
Everything about her was amazing and as soon as he laid his eyes on Natasha he had been fascinated from the start.
What started off as being acquainted by mutual friends, turned into a relationship he could easily say was the best he’s ever had.. not that he had that many to begin with.
But to be fair, he was 23 when they first met and now he’s 27, so it’s not like he was that old anyways. Previously, he only had what 2 or 3 girlfriends officially? That’s not bad, excuse him for focusing on his education and then immediately onto his career.
“Just come out with us tonight!” Bucky tried to persuade Steve who was half listening and focused on his workout instead. “You've been a complete turd for a week now, what are you, on your period?”
Steve rolled his eyes as he stood up and grabbed a towel, wiping his face down. “I knew there was a reason I was about to ignore your call.” He’s been busy and partying at some random bar in downtown Brooklyn wasn’t exactly his style anymore. Not since they got kicked out the first time, he’s not even sure if they’re welcomed at all.
“Give me one good reason why you don’t want to come with us tonight, it’s Wade’s birthday!”
“How about because I don’t like Wade? Or that Wade used to terrorize me in high school? Maybe because Wade still owes me $700 from smashing my windshield the last time we went out with him?” In fact, why are they even still friends with him?
“Come on Rogers, if you don’t go then Sam won’t go, and if you and Sam don’t come, then I won’t want to go. Do you really want to break this poor man’s heart on his birthday?”
“Yup,” Steve answered easily, about to hang up.
“Wait, wait, wait..What if I pay for your windshield? Then it’s like, no harm, no foul-“
“Sure, that’d work if I hadn’t paid for everything already and had to manually clean out my car after he puked in it the same night.”
Bucky groaned in an attempt of almost giving up. “Stop being difficult.” He didn’t want to have to pull out the big guns, but there was only one last way to get him to come. “How about this. You remember that girl we saw at Thor’s get together? Red hair, good looking, and you rudely called dibs on her like she’s some piece of meat-“
“I only did that because I knew you or Sam would’ve gone and went after her instead.” True, they’ve only spoken one word to each other but a woman like that was much more than just a one-nighter. He could tell just by the way she carried herself. “And what about her? You expect me to believe that she’d even attend something even relatively close to being near Wade-“
Steve boredly tapped his fingers against the bar’s counter, close to ditching this place and making a run for it before Wade gets too drunk and ends up slashing his new tires..That is until he heard a slightly familiar voice order a drink.
“Let me get a sex on the beach.”
The bartender snickered, “Swimsuit on or off?”
She gave the man a blank and unamused, the bartender wiping the smirk off his face and clearing his throat, taking her credit card and ringing the drink up.
Even Steve couldn’t resist his amusement with the line and how corny it was, taking swig off his own drink before looking at the counter, “You know for the record..I would’ve said something a little more indecisive, like in the water or on the sand because obviously if you were to have sex on a beach it’d be without clothes.”
“Yeah?…” Natasha glanced at him interestedly. “Which one would you pick?”
“Oh the sand for sure. I think it gets a bad rep. It can possibly leave a little bit of sand in uncomfortable places but the sound of the waves crashing on the shore in the background, well you can’t beat it.” Steve victoriously drank a little more of his drink upon making her smile. “I’m Steve,” he introduced himself. “You’re Natasha right? We met briefly at-“
“Thor’s house.” She accepted his handshake. “You were the guy that got his windshield broken by Wade-“
Steve winced, sucking a bit of air through his teeth. “Yeah, that’s me. Glad I left some impression on you before I left that night.”
It wasn’t the destruction of his window that caught her attention to him. “Trust me, I noticed you way before he flung a brick through your car.”
“Really?”
“Mhm,” She responded coyly, taking a sip of her drink, “Maybe I’ll see you around, Steve.”
“Never know, maybe you will.” Maybe she most definitely, positively, most certainly will.
What made their relationship so much better was that it was so damn easy was how well they understood each other, how things would just click. Jealousy, cheating, possessive behavior, all that shit was nonexistent. He was all about her and she was all about him.
It actually surprised him how a jealous mishap or argument never ensued amongst them but hey he certainly wasn’t complaining. Now let’s not get anything wrong, they did have their—off days even though it’s been explained how they’re always in “sync”.
Throughout their 4 years of being together of course there’s bound to be problems between them relationship wise, some worse than others depending on what they were fighting about, but the fact that they’ve always been able to easily overcome these issues is what made him fall for her even more. She kept a high level of maturity except during the aftermath where she openly shows him her sensitive side.
“You still mad?” Steve asked childishly because that’s what she was acting like. A child. He came behind her, caging her in his arms. It’s been about what? 3 hours of them avoiding each other in the same place, just in different rooms.
Natasha ignored him, continuing her task of being on her phone even though she was barely paying attention to it, she was just trying to not give him any.
He couldn’t hold back from how funny he finds it whenever she’s angry at it which is probably why she’s ignoring him now.
Steve rested his chin on her shoulder like he would occasionally do when he’s apologizing, only this time he hadn’t said sorry. “Why are you acting so hostile?”
“Why are you acting like a dick?”
“Wow, am I? I’m sorry,” He whispered onto her neck, softly kissing the area. He rarely, very rarely ever reaches a level of annoyance where other situations would affect how he acts in their relationship because he’s so patient with everything. “Can I get a kiss?”
“Depends, do you still want to be a jerk?” To think that their fight and little disagreement took place in the car.
Steve scoffed, “Not if it doesn’t get me anywhere later on.” He gently pulled her face towards him, lovingly kissing her.
Steve laid in their bed staring straight up at the ceiling, feeling her press kisses on almost every part of his face, none of them getting reciprocated.
She leaned back on his lap and had to stifle a laugh as he continued to look at her dully. “I said I was sorry.” They were wrestling and she accidentally hit him harder than either of them realized, now he had the smallest bruise near his abdomen and has been acting like a baby ever since.
His expression never changed but she could tell he wasn’t really angry because if he was his hands wouldn’t still be on her hips.
He also would’ve been sleeping by now instead of staying up and entertaining her.
Natasha leaned down again this time placing multiple soft kisses on his lips, feeling him half respond. “Give me a proper kiss,” she smiled.
“Say sorry again.”
“I’m sorry,” she repeated truthfully and meaningfully, easing her lips towards his and then smirked into the kiss when he eagerly brought his lips to hers.
She wasn’t high maintenance, she was fun to be around, so beautiful. Jesus, his family loved her and hers was extremely entertaining. His mom often calls her, possibly more than she even calls him. His grandmother, who hardly likes anyone outside of the family immediately became smitten over her much like everyone else had.
However, unlike his family, hers resisided in Russia, so the first time Steve got the opportunity to meet them, they welcomed him with open arms being surprisingly friendly people. He’ll never forget the first time he met them.
They had been dating for 8 months, he flew down with her for her mom’s birthday and remembers having the greatest time. Getting to know her parents, her sister, grandparents and her aunts and uncles that didn’t shy away from the fact that they were wasted almost the entire time.
He had the best food, some of which he’s already tried for whenever Natasha made him something. That was also the time he realized how competitive they are because the games he played with her and her family had gotten borderline violent at one point.
He never knew it was possible to get a black eye in charades.. From her little cousin out of everyone. Yesterday he invited the young girl to the carnival with them and this is how he gets repaid? He bought her two funnel cakes and a bag of cotton candy like she begged for. He even won her a stuffed animal at one of those scammy competition stands.
“Still hurts?” Natasha asked, sitting down next to him on the couch while he iced his eye.
“Kind of, I think I’ll live.” His eye felt like it healed itself when she gently kissed him. “She packs quite the punch for a 7 year old.”
“She takes karate classes,” Natasha informed him, caressing his chin in a careful and calm manner. She noticed the little girl out of the corner of her eye and told her to wait in Russian. “Ты не думаешь, что тебе нужно извиниться?”
The girl groaned and came back over to them with her arms folded, looking ashamed and embarrassed. She didn’t mean to nail him in the eye, but she got upset because he wasn’t on her team and suddenly caught herself swinging a fist at him when she was trying to demonstrate someone swimming.
Steve gave her a small puppy dog face, “Just one tiny sorry? I’d really appreciate it.”
Nadia let out a little whine before giving in and mumbling out a small, “I’m sorry.”
“I accept your apology. Only!...if you teach me how to swing like that,” he joked, making the little girl agree and run back off.
They were enjoying a nice romantic walk along the beach. Or what was supposed to be a nice romantic walk along the beach. He didn’t know beaches in Dubai would be this pretty especially not in December. His arm was resting around her shoulder and hers around his waist.
Their moment was cut short however when Steve’s goddaughter came waddling in front of them.
“Tasha,” The child whined, grabbing Natasha’s hand and pointing towards a woman selling ice cream.
“We don’t have to if you don’t want to,” Steve said, their walk was becoming really intimate, they could make a break towards their hotel room right now. “She had one earlier, it’s okay to say no to her.”
“You know I can’t do that.” Natasha hoisted the little girl up when she saw that she was reaching up for her. She rested her head on Natasha’s shoulder when she tried explaining what kind of ice cream she wanted.
Steve always knew his family members preferred her over him. He would admit though, seeing her hold a small child in her arms made him have some very eye opening thoughts...they’d talk about that later.
What else was there to say about his girlfriend? He’d rather not describe anything in their sex life although that was it pretty damn phenomenal as well. Like really..wow. Enough to make him blush from the thought of it, something he occasionally finds himself doing around his friends whenever they ask about that aspect of his and Natasha’s relationship.
“You alright?” Steve asked his girlfriend as he felt her shift on his lap while scanning around the room.
“Let’s go to the car really quick.”
Steve obliged easily, believing that she had forgotten something, but he should’ve caught that little glint in her eyes right away.
He unlocked his car door but instead of opening it, he felt her push him against it, he was confused at first then he got the reason behind it.
“Babe, come on,” Steve laughed lowly, looking around to where they were, his hands holding onto her waist. They were in a literal parking lot. It was the evening, and it did look a little secluded. Not only that but she has been leading him on the entire night, mostly because the dinner party for one of his co-workers had gotten boring and she wanted to have more fun with him.
“What, we’re not doing anything wrong,” she said in a very suggestive voice, making Steve look around them again.
“Not yet, but we both know you want to do something wrong.” He watched her smile, pushing her body against his. “We could always wait until we get home,” he suggested, but once again, they both knew it’d be impossible to wait, not with how she’s been leading him on.
“Please? We’ll be quick,” She said softly, palming his chest.
Steve gave the parking lot one last look, before reaching behind and opening the door. He couldn’t mask how excited he was no matter how much he tried. “Alright, 5 minutes,” he offered.
“10.” Her hand traveled a little lower down his body, both of them becoming very entertained, probably because they were the tiniest bit tipsy. “Maybe 15?”
“Get in here,” he said charmingly, unable to hold back his attraction anymore.
“ You couldn’t have picked a worse time?” Natasha softly moaned, holding his head in place where he continued kissing up and along her cleavage.
He held her higher up against him, holding her close. “What, your break starts in a couple minutes anyways, we’re just getting a head start.” Leaning in and lightly pecking her lips, “It’s not like this is our first time doing this in the closet, or any room at your job for that matter.”
“But those were times where my boss wasn’t in the building.” She had to bite her lip at the feel of his mouth aiming for a specific spot on her neck.
“Whatever, your boss loves me,” Steve vouched, pulling his lips away. “And if someone from maintenance walks in, I’ll take all the blame.”
That was something she had to laugh at. Did he think they were in high school or something? She tilted his chin up having to lick her lips just at the sight of him. Steve wore a toothy grin and went back to kissing her body whenever he could get his lips on. “Mm!” He said as he pulled away for a quick second. “What do you want to eat for lunch?”
“You.” Her arms wrapped around his neck and slammed their lips together.
Alright, well, that was enough of that. Point is, he loves her, he really really loves her. Deeply in love with her, It’s been 4 years together and it’s been the best years of his life that he’s spent with anyone.
Steve came into their apartment. The place they’ve been sharing for 3 out of 4 years might he add. It was beautiful, spacious, cozy and was located right in the heart of the city, the noise was definitely a minor problem but you couldn’t beat the view, so taxis honking at 4 in the morning was worth it if it meant seeing such a delightful sight of the city from their windows.
He entered a little more into the apartment, and got a beer from the fridge. Hearing Natasha’s voice trail from one of the back rooms and into where he was, hanging up on the person she’d come off the phone with.
“Hey,” Steve said to her, quickly kissing her lips. “Was that your mom?”
“Mhm, she was just doing her usual calls.”
Those “usual“ calls typically consisted of her telling Natasha about one of her most recent problems or gossiping about one of their family members. “Yeah? Is she still dealing with lemmings eating her garden again or is she pissed that she hasn’t found out the secret to your dad’s winning streak in monopoly?”
Even though that’s not what they were discussing over the phone it was actually very great guesses. “The second one,” she lied, feeling her heart clench when she saw how genuine his smile was and almost, for a second, was close to not going through with this after all..almost.
“I’m telling you, the man is a genius, he’s using the businessman skills he has in real life and making incredible in-game negotiations. That $500 dollars for Pacific Avenue just seemed too good of a deal at the time.” Of course by the end of the game he went bankrupt and her father swindled him of all his in-game money.
She didn’t even think about how her dad might feel. He and Steve had such an incredible bond. They were so familiar around each other that to the point that he calls him “son” and whenever her dad would plan vacations, there was no automatic invitation because Steve didn’t need an invite. Her father would just assume he was coming and loved every second of the moments they have together.
“I can only imagine.”
“You know what, speaking of your dad I just spoke to him the other day and he said we should consider having another family vacation. My family, your family, just like last year. What do you think, I’m pretty sure our moms would love to catch up.”
Oh god their moms were like best friends at this point. Whenever her mom was in town she’d spend hours, possibly days over at Steve’s parents house much to his parents appreciation. If their moms looked the slightest bit alike, anyone would swear that they were sisters.
Natasha took a deep breath, putting her phone on the counter. “Steve, we need to talk-“
“Oh and get this! Wait, I’m sorry, I don’t mean to cut you off,” He respectfully kissed her cheek. “But you remember that restaurant we’ve been wanting to try out but has been insanely booked the past few weeks?”
“The authentic Japanese one? What about it?”
His entire demeanor was coy and playful, happily hoisting her onto the counter. “Let’s just say a certain someone, also known as your very dreamy boyfriend managed to get us reserved seats at the chef’s table.”
Her gaze unintentionally softened, “You did?” feeling one of his hands cascade around her waist, pulling her closer where she then absentmindedly slid her hands up towards his shoulders, out of force of habit.
“I did. And I also wouldn’t want to spoil any other surprises but when we get home..” He planted soft and warm butterfly kisses along her collarbone and up towards her chin. “There’ll be a nice, cold bottle of champagne waiting for us, maybe a couple strawberries dipped in chocolate. Possibly even a massage in store for you if you’re nice to me,” he said the last part half jokingly.
Natasha couldn’t hold away from smiling at him and bringing him in for a kiss. She could feel how the edge of his mouth curved up into the kiss, everytime their lips touched it was like electricity. It was always so sweet and loving and made her heart melt each and every time. It’s because she knew whenever they were together his mind and attention was always on her.
The heavier and deeper their kiss became, the more her senses trailed off the topic of their relationship, feeling his fingers that were currently on the counter, graze her thigh. Truth be told, she’s not sure what would’ve happened if Steve hadn’t smoothly broken their kiss and thoughtfully reminded her. Natasha looked at him questioningly when his lips weren’t on hers anymore.
“I didn’t mean to interrupt earlier. What was it that you wanted to talk about?” He asked considerably, swaying a hand along her hip.
“Hm?” She was confused for a second before setting her mind in the right place again. “Oh-Right, um.” She cleared her throat when her voice broke a little. Her hands left his shoulders and landed on his chest right, lightly pounding one fist against him as she came to her next sentence. “There’s honestly no easy way to say this.”
“What is it?” He grinned calmly. “Don’t tell me you didn’t like the flowers I sent to your job today. I was gonna get you roses but I know they’re out of season and I know you’re allergic to orchids-“
“Steve, just—stop.” She got off the counter. Every word that comes out of his mouth would inevitably make this decision even harder to make. “Listen,” she started again, gingerly bunching his shirt in her grasp. “I..think we should break up,” She told him, watching as his face gracefully fell into one of...well she’s not even sure.
He looked shocked, surprised and in disbelief all in one as if someone pranked him.
“What?” He asked windedly.
Natasha didn’t bother repeating it. She knew that he heard her and repeating it would only cause more of a heart break between them. “Don’t make me say it again..”
“Did you not like the flowers or?” He asked desperately.
“Hm?- No! I loved the flowers, they were beautiful.”
Now his mind was racing over where things had gone wrong. Did it happen in a matter of minutes because he’s positive they were doing perfectly fine. “Was it something I said o-or did-“
“Steve..” Natasha cut him off, “It’s not you..I promise.” Technically it was him, but it was also her. He was taking too long and she ran out of patience.
“Please don’t make this an ‘it’s not you, it’s me situation’. Nat, are you serious? We don’t have to break up.” What happened? She said it was her, did she cheat on him or something? If so, then they could talk it out, he’s that crazy about her, he doesn’t want to lose her. “We can talk about it.” They’re adults, he doesn’t run away from problems and she knows that.
No they couldn’t, it was just too complicated and she’s scared that if she tells him she’d only be forcing him to make a decision and this something she wants to be natural. “I’m tired of waiting-“
“Waiting for what-“
“For you-“
“For me to do what?!” He asked frantically. What was she expecting him to do? If she’d tell him, he’d do it in a heartbeat but she was holding out, but she doesn’t want to tell him. By one look at her he could see that she was done. She came to a decision, a tough one, and she wouldn’t change her mind unless he does something but he doesn’t know what to do! “Nat, honestly.” He turned her face towards him, holding her chin in his hand and finding that her eyes had begun watering, close to breaking down. “Don’t make me beg..I’ll do whatever you want, I’ll change whatever you want. Just tell me what it is.”
And she knows that, that’s one of the reasons she loves him, but him changing himself is the last thing she wants. However, she can’t be the one to tell him what it is she wants him to do..it has to be done on its own. He needs to make the move himself. “I’m sorry,” she repeated sadly.
Natasha didn’t mind him leaving short kisses on her lips, it’ll probably be the last time it might happen and she knows it’s his way of trying to get her to change her mind but that wasn’t the case this time.
This wasn’t her going against his wants of eating out tonight rather than ordering something..this was their relationship, in its entirety at the line.
Steve pulled away, that same sad and apologetic look in her eyes never depleted. He’s not sure what her reasoning is but if it’s making her cry then of course he’d start to feel like it was his fault despite her saying it wasn’t.
The only reason he wasn’t crying is because he’s trying to keep himself composed. He still wants to be there for her. “Natasha, look at me.” They looked each other directly in the eyes, their breathing slowed but their hearts racing “Are you kidding? You really want to break up?” He asked quietly, watching as she nodded. “O-okay..” What else was he supposed to say? What was he supposed to do, force her to stay? He was close to getting on his knees and begging her to change her mind but he had more dignity than that. If she wants to end things then..this is it.
Steve removed his hands from her waist, it felt so wrong, just empty without touching her. What was the purpose of having hands if they’re not meant to be holding her? What was he supposed to do with his mouth if not talk to her and kiss her? Eat? If he couldn’t eat with her what was the point of eating?!
Steve felt her cup his face in her hands and their lips come together. They’ve kissed each other goodbye plenty of times in the 4 years they’ve been dating, but this time was like no other.
He was dreading the moment her lips would have left him because it would be the true ending to their relationship and he wasn’t ready to say bye at all.
As soon as he felt her start to pull away, it was like a hit to the gut, hearing the sound of their kiss ending one last time.