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fart man idek

Summary:

this was. a suggestion by my lovely friend. i was bored in an aldi parking lot and she told me to write chris gettinf farted on

im so sorry, im also not formatting this corecrtly its a fucking fart fic

Notes:

RHIS IS 100% CRACK AND I HATE THAT I WROTE THIS
I AM SO SORRYYDHFJ

follow me on tumblr @goo-goopants!!

Work Text:

“dude, HAHA, oh my god, do you have any more in you?” corey laughed at craig. the group of nine had been messing around in the downtime of recording, bouncing ideas off one another. things had been serious at first, then beers were cracked open and, well, with nine disgusting men in one room one thing leads to another and they all ended up comparing gas.
chris had been sitting in the corner of the couch, trying to hide his erection. he was embarrassingly turned on. he already had a crush on the sampler and seeing the silent man rip some fat juicy ones, just really fucked with him.
“a-alright guys, i think im gonna head home” chris stuttered out after craig let out a loud, stinky fart.
“haha what, too much to handle, fehn?” sid joked at him.
“n-no, im just. beat. i want to go home” chris muttered.
“oh sure, you’re GONNA be beat when you get home!” mick laughed as he pointed out chris’s obvious erection.
chris’s face turned BRIGHT red and he left as fast as possible. he heard the others laughing as he sped out of the room. once he got back to his house, his erection flagged a bit, but then he thought about the samplers farts and he felt harder than he ever had in his life. he was about to go upstairs and take care of things, when someone knocked on his door. he took a deep breath and opened the door. surprised to see, it was craig.
“o-oh... h-hey craig...” chris muttered.
“hi” he said and pushed past chris.
“what are you doing here?” chris questioned the man.
“i can tell my farts turned you on.” craig simply replied.
“WHAT? N-NO? I DONT KNOW WHAT YOU’RE TALKING ABOUT!” chris sputtered.
craig just looked at him and let out a long fart. chris whimpered at that. fuck, he thought, im caught.
“honestly chris, i dont mind” the silent man said, smirking a bit. he walked closer to chris and chris blushed.
“i can help you take care of that...” craig offered, grabbing chris’s hard cock. chris moaned out loud and asked how.
“oh you’ll see.” craig stated. so many thoughts were running through chris’s head. ‘was this a joke, did the guys set him up? was this really about to happen? and if so, what was GOING to happen..?’ chris came back to reality and was in his bedroom.
“undress.” craig made it clear he was in charge.
“yes sir..” chris muttered back at him, and started to take his clothing off.
“good boy. now lay down on the bed, on your back.” craig demanded.
chris gulped and laid down, feeling exposed with his cock proudly standing. he was nervous.
craig looked in his drawer and found some lotion, he put some in his hands and touched chris.
chris moaned out and started to thrust into craigs wonderful hand.
“g-god this is...” chris didnt even know what to say. his dreams were coming true.. only one thing was missing though....
“dont think i forgot why i came here, chris.” craig said as he removed his hand. chris moaned at the loss of sensation. he watched craig move towards his upper body and undress. he gulped.. god was craig beautiful...
his thoughts stopped when craig climbed onto the bed, straddling his face...
oh god, chris thought, is he gonna do what i think... he audibly moaned out loud. craig smirked devilishly and sat right on chris’s face, leaving him no time to adjust and let out a fart. chris couldnt breathe and felt wonderful... the sensation of the warm gas hitting his face almost made him cum right then and there. he moaned, muffled by craigs delish thighs.
“you like that, you nasty fart whore” craig said as he let out some more farts. chris, unable to reply groaned loudly back, sniffing as much as the putrid air as he could. god he’d be content to die like this. craig started to touch his hard cock again and he thought he was gonna blow. craig let out some more farts and flicked his wrist. chris came embarrassingly fast with a high, loud moan. he felt as if he was on another planet. he never wanted to come down.. craig climbed off chris and asked if he was alright.
“god... god craig that was more than i could ever ask for...” he replied, a little teary.
craig smiled, back to his quiet self and looked down at chris. they locked eyes, and next thing they knew, they were kissing. chris felt like he was goinf to explode. who knew his fart kink was gonna get him the man of his dreams
“ive wanted to do that forever...” chris confessed
“me too.” craig replied
chris smiled at him, kissed him again they cuddled, falling asleep happily