Chapter Text
It had been a long and exhausting day for Kihyun. First he had to wake up early for an appointment at a recording studio, immediately followed by a photoshoot, then dance practice, and at the end a promised meeting with his father.
And now he was confronted with such an view.
Frozen, baffled, Kihyun could only stand there and stare at the weird scene, the door not yet open completely, the handle still in his hand while the two culprits stared back at him with their eyes open wide.
He did what almost anyone would do when unintentionally stumbling upon a situation he shouldn't. “I-Im… S-sorry,” he stuttered, as he stepped back and closed the door in front of him.
He turned on his heels and frowned in confusion while his mind worked at the speed of light to process what the hell his eyes had seen. Changkyun and Wonho were...doing what exactly?
He tried hard to figure it out while he stared at the picture that was already perfectly burned behind his eyelids. And as the most obvious explanation presented itself on a red carpet with drum rolls announcing it's appearance beforehand, he felt his rage grow rapidly. Knocking on the cage that held the beast captive.
Everything reminded him of a time he doesn't want to remember.
When Changkyun and Wonho were dating, they didn't really keep it a secret. They actually told the others about it the day after it started, and that caused Kihyun to experience his first heartbreak.
Back then he already had a crush on Changkyun for quite some time but couldn't muster up the courage to confess, was simply too much of a dumb little coward. Too shy, too afraid to do anything that would show the younger his true feelings. So all he could do was to suffer in silence.
To make it hurt a little less he kept on telling himself that it was okay, that the one he loved was happy and nothing else mattered. He had no other choice but to do that, right? As long as Changkyun was happy, he would be happy too.
For a small amount of time it actually worked. Until he accidentally caught them red-handed.
His little innocent bubble did burst on that day, and the feelings he had so carefully shut away somewhere in the back corner of his heart suddenly overwhelmed him. It was the birth of the uncontrollable beast called jealousy.
Someone was touching Changkyun. His Changkyun, because he was in love with him first. Touching him in places that were unspeakable, unthinkable for Kihyun. With their dirty hands. Hands that weren't his. Hands he wished were his own. Touching his innocent love.
Even though he never dared to imagine Changkyun like this until then, everything inside him now was shouting that he really, really, really wanted him, too. Wanted to hold his Changkyun like Wonho did. Wanted him all for himself, to be the only one to ever do this. Not only for the pleasure, but for the meaning behind it, too.
To be so intimate with someone else, to let yourself go like this in front of the other, at least for Kihyun, meant to trust the other to the fullest; to really, deeply like him.
He wanted to be that one for Changkyun.
And now someone else was experiencing that with him.
Touching his precious and innocent angel with their hands.
Someone who wasn't him!
Kihyun seriously tried his best, but from that day on, most of the times he saw those two together he couldn't control the beast inside of him. He scolded Wonho for the dumbest things and started fights with him for nothing. It was ridiculous. At some point he also started to fight with Changkyun and because of that with everyone else as well. It was really bad.
Those days were the reason why everyone said he was nagging too much and why the members compared him to the rainy or tornado season on that one fanmeeting.
It was simply too hard for him to accept that he was too late, that someone else had what was meant to be his, as he believed. It frustrated him to no end and he didn't know what to do with this feelings, couldn't talk with anybody about it.
After the members sat down with him, telling him how important he was for them and how concerned they were about his state, he managed to gain control of his feelings again. Thankfully nobody had noticed the real reason behind his bad mood.
That didn’t mean that the beast inside him disappeared, that it didn't hurt every time he saw the two, but he managed to swallow his anger instead of letting it out. Maybe the fact that Changkyun gave him more attention from then on, through small but meaningful gestures, helped as well.
Kihyun finally felt truly happy again when the two announced their break up. Unfortunately, they said the reason was that they liked each other a lot, but not as lovers. In other words: after their break up they stayed almost as close as they were before. Probably because they were simply used to be so touchy and didn't break up in bad terms.
For Kihyun it meant that he couldn't forget his jealousy. But at least he knew that Changkyun's heart was available again and that nobody was touching him in such an inappropriate way anymore.
It meant that the heaven above blessed him with a second chance to finally make Changkyun his.
The decision to confess was made the moment they told them about their breakup, but of course he wouldn't be so dumb to do it right then. He wasn't sure how Changkyun really felt about the breakup and he didn't want to end up as a replacement for Wonho. So he waited a few months until he was sure that Changkyun really was over it.
The whole torture, from when he had discovered his feelings until he was ready to confess, lasted two years and three months. He knew it was the right time when he was the one Changkyun did spend his most time with, was the clingiest with and even flirted with him from time to time.
So he confessed, and not only his love for the maknae, but also all the other feelings connected with it, everything he had gone through since it started.
It was the first time he was able to talk about everything and it all got poured down on Changkyun. He even told him how much he hated it to see Wonho being around the younger.
To his surprise, his little outburst didn't scare Changkyun as much as himself. Instead of running away like Kihyun expected him to do, would expect everyone to do, Changkyun told him that it's okay. That he understands, and most importantly that he loves Kihyun, too.
From then on, whenever Changkyun had to work with Wonho, the jealous beast came back to life, raging inside his mind.
But thankfully the younger knew exactly how to handle Kihyun, gave him an extra amount of attention afterwards and always assured him that there's nothing going on between them anymore. After some time, Kihyun actually managed to ban almost all his concerns regarding Wonho out of his head. Almost all.
To wrap this short summary of their relationship up, Changkyun knew perfectly well how big the problem was Kihyun had with Wonho.
So why on earth did his eyes had to see such a scene? What exactly induced his, HIS, lover to think it would be a good idea to expose his ass to his ex?
What else needs to be said here is that, after months of being a couple, Changkyun refused to let Kihyun have a go on him. Their not so rare makeout sessions were always cut from the younger as soon as they got more heated.
So again, why on earth was Changkyun exposing his ass to Wonho when Kihyun himself didn't get to see it until now?
When despite that, Kihyun had put all his trust into Changkyun and was waiting for him to be able to do the same?
His mind was working like crazy, so many memories, thoughts and questions appearing and disappearing in milliseconds, mixing with arguments for and against Changkyun from the good and evil sitting on his shoulders, until the door behind him got teared open.
“Kihyun!” he heard his boyfriend shout, and when he turned around, saw Changkyun and Wonho behind him, their panicked expressions, one question stood out.
Was Changkyun cheating on him?