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Shinpachi might not know the sort of past that Gin-san had, but he knows it’s the reason behind some of his Bad Days. It deserves the capitalization because on those days, he truly fears that if they left him be, he might never return to them.
His eyes would truly look like the dead; soulless, belonging to a husk of his former self. Sometimes they seem to stare at something and nothing at once, though there will always be a layer of anguished pain to it. Gin-san might lay motionless, or he’d go through the motions of his day like it’s an automated response to his mind checking out.
Shinpachi especially hated the latter because they only physically had Gin-san with them. The essence of what made the silver haired samurai uniquely him -- what drew Shinpachi to his light -- seemed to have been extinguished.
So on those Bad Days, Shinpachi and Kagura would do everything in their power to help Gin-san feel better.
As always, Shinpachi swung by to the office early in the morning. It was quiet when he entered, which was expected because Gin-san and Kagura-chan couldn’t be bothered to wake up early unless under dire circumstances. He made his way to the living room first, and after picking up some litter on the floor, he poked his head into Gin-san’s room.
The curtains were still drawn but even in the darkened room, Shinpachi didn’t miss the curled up figure on the futon. This wasn’t the usual way he covered himself up to ease a hangover, he noted with a quiet sigh.
A quick survey revealed a head that was barely peeking out of the blanket with glazed over eyes staring at the wall. The owner barely seemed to acknowledge his presence, or maybe he just didn’t care.
A Bad Day, then.
Shinpachi quietly left the room and went to the closet where Kagura-chan claimed as her own. He slid open the door, finding her still sleeping soundly. Some rough shakes was needed to rouse her, which she wasn’t too happy about.
“Shinpachi, it’s too early,” she grumbled angrily, rubbing at her sleepy eyes. “A lady needs her beauty sleep so they don’t become boring characters like you.”
“I don’t think that’s even related,” he replied, and it was his faint voice that caught her attention. Kagura-chan instantly looked more alert, brows furrowing.
“What’s wrong?”
Shinpachi sighed softly. “Gin-san’s having a bad day.”
He didn’t have to explain any further. Kagura-chan knew what he meant, for she too had stumbled across Gin-san when he experienced these moments. Shinpachi couldn’t even imagine how scary it was to find your guardian figure apparently dead to the world, though from her quiet sobs when it happened the first time, it must have been terrifying.
She sported a worried look, then stumbled out of her closet. Shinpachi was right behind her as she entered Gin-san’s room. Kagura-chan had always been more physical in her attempts at comforting, so it wasn’t surprising to see her sliding under Gin-san’s blanket to cuddle into his chest.
(It was okay for her to do this. They’ve learnt to distinguish when it was best to just be in his general presence or to be more handsy with their approach. Shinpachi didn’t want to remember the time when Gin-san reacted strongly to touch, and not in a good way).
Gin-san didn’t react to her, nor to the fingers that gently ran through his curly silver hair. This was Shinpachi’s way of comforting him, and he’d continue to do so while murmuring sweet nothings into his ear.
“It’s going to be alright, Gin-san. You’re not alone. We’re here for you.” Shinpachi would repeat variation of these until his throat dried out. With Gin-san lost in the turbulent sea that was his past memories, they needed to be his anchor to reality.
Kagura-chan acted like a warm, constant presence near his heart, while Shinpachi applied assuring touches. If he was physically able to, he wanted nothing more than to push out the gunk from Gin-san’s head. Sifting his fingers through his hair was the next best thing.
Shinpachi would only stop when their boss stirred, or looked like he was settling back into reality. The light slowly returned to his eyes, still world weary but in tune with his surroundings.
“Shinpachi? Kagura?” His hoarse voice whispered, gaze flickering from the head of red hair to the glasses peering down at him. Shinpachi smiled at him, feeling relieved that they managed to pull him back out again. Gin-san wasn’t going to drift away from them today.
“We don’t have work to do today, Gin-san. You can continue resting,” he suggested gently. It didn’t take much to convince the perm head to do so. Fighting a mental war was always physically draining, especially the sort that someone with Gin-san’s emotional baggage would suffer through.
When he felt the figure beneath him lightly curl into Kagura-chan, that was when he too slipped underneath the blanket, easily slotting into the space behind Gin-san. This strong back had always protected them. It was only fair for Shinpachi to return the favor.
One arm wrapped itself around Gin-san’s torso, his hand laid gently over Kagura-chan’s shoulder. Shinpachi lightly pressed himself into Gin-san’s back, face buried just below the nape of his neck. Kagura-chan mumbled something indistinct, while Shinpachi let out a soft sigh.
Today was a Bad Day but they were slowly helping their beloved boss towards a better tomorrow. Such days were never a fun time, but Kagura-chan and Shinpachi will always be there for their Gin-san.
For now, the trio would just cuddle together, having a quiet lie-in as the world continued on with its day.