Chapter Text
Hermione’s nightmare-
Hermione screamed as Bellatrix straddled her and carved the one word she heard over and over again ever since coming into the wizarding world… Mudblood. Suddenly Bellatrix’s face began to morph as she cackled, and her surroundings began shifting with her. As everything became clear, Hermione was back in her apartment, still pinned to the floor. She was on her stomach this time as Ronald Weasley began to slam her face into the floor while saying, “You stupid fucking dyke! I’ll show you what it’s like to be with a real man.” Ron turned her over, and gave her several hard, vicious thrusts while pinning her arms above her head.
Once he had finally spilled his seed into her, he pulled out and fixed his pants. “See what your missing? How could you ever be with another after you have had someone as amazing as me?” Hermione spit in his face with what little strength she had left. He back handed her… hard. She tried to lift her arms to protect her face, but found they were still pinned down. Ron started to pound on her face before he started to strangle her. “You were supposed to be mine! We were supposed to be together! You fucking bitch! I’ll fucking kill you before I let anyone else touch you!”
Everything began to shift once more, but before the picture could become clear she heard Narcissa’s voice trying to call her back from her dreams. Hermione’s mind started swimming towards consciousness. However, before she could open her eyes she heard her. Lex may not have been standing there, but her voice was as clear as day. “You are a monster Hermione Granger. Clearly you aren’t the woman I fell in love with. I don’t even recognize you. Hell, I don’t even know who you are any more.”
Hermione shot up to a sitting position, struggling to breath as anxiety and fear flooded her system. Narcissa was there instantly, attempting to calm her. It took Hermione a good ten minutes to slow her breathing down to a somewhat normal rate, while Narcissa was rubbing circles on her back. Seeing that Hermione was calming, Narcissa asked, “Do you want to tell me about it?”
“What time is it?” Hermione asked in almost a rough whisper, as if she spent hours screaming at the top of her lungs.
“It’s about 2:30 in the morning.” Narcissa replied just as softly. She slowly pulled Hermione back so that they were against the pillows.
As Narcissa settled, Hermione curled up to her and rested her head between her shoulder and chest. Narcissa’s arms instantly wrapped around the troubled witch as she waited. “It started with Bellatrix.” When Hermione mentioned her sister, Narcissa did her best not to cringe or stiffen. The world was truly a safer place now that Bellatrix Lestrange was dead. “Just as she finished branding me, everything shifted to him.” Hermione started to shake as she remembered that night.
Narcissa used her free hand and summoned a small vial from her dresser and tried to hand it to Hermione. “It’s a mild calming draught. Please don’t fight me on this. You have just had a terrible shock, and it is causing your anxiety to run rampart. I can smell the magic crackling in the air as we speak.”
Hermione reluctantly took the vial and drank it. Her eye lids instantly started to become heavy and she tried to pull away but felt all the will to fight leave her body. “What did you give me?” She asked with a large slur.
Laying Hermione down with her she replied, “I’m sorry darling. That was laced with a mild sedative. You need to rest and I knew that wouldn’t happen. I hope you can forgive me in the morning.” Hermione wanted to reply, to fight, but the darkness was swift in claiming her. The potion worked within seconds of ingestion, Narcissa designed it that way. If Hermione ever spoke to her again, she would find out why Narcissa always kept a few doses around.
~Page Break~
Despite the potion Narcissa slipped her, Hermione was up at her normal time. At five in the morning, she rolled over and sat up very slowly while holding her head, unsure if it was from the drinking or the potion… or both. She quietly gathered her things and went to leave. Seeing the small writing desk, she quickly went over and left a note for the sleeping witch in the other room. Hermione managed to slip out of Narcissa’s rooms quickly and silently. Tip toeing back to her quarters, Hermione brushed her teeth and changed into some very comfortable clothing for her work out.
Standing in front of her door, she adjusted her yoga pants and Oxford hoodie before doing a few stretches to loosen up. She swiftly made her way through long forgotten halls. Once she was out of the castle, she paused to look up and closed her eyes as she took in a deep breath and held it for a moment. She slowly exhaled as she opened all of her senses, feeling the calm of her surroundings. Taking another deep breath, she decided to change up her morning routine and jogged towards the front gates. Right before she truly committed to her jog, she asked the castle to make sure her row boat was waiting for her at the docks in Hogsmeade. Hermione took a few more minutes to stretch and a few more deep breaths before setting off, hoping that the fuzzy sensation that was tickling her brain would soon fade as her body forcefully expelled all the toxins it was currently harboring.
As her mind was beginning to wander, Hermione focused on what she was feeling as she jogged towards the village. How it felt with the wind passing by her, the cool air on her skin, the sound of her feeing hitting the dirt path, the way the contact reverberated through her body with each step, the way she was breathing. Soon enough her mind was empty and she was one with herself and her surroundings.
Before she knew it, she was standing at the docks in Hogsmeade, sending up a silent prayer of thanks for her boat being there. Hermione carefully situated herself before picking up the ore’s. Slowly she felt her thoughts begin to wander as she started to question recent events. She had so many questions and conflicting feelings. It felt as if Narcissa stabbed her in the back. How could she trust her after what she did? She said she would protect her, and for once she opened herself up. She had opened her heart, and look at where that had led her. As the hurt began to take over, Hermione increased her speed, focused on her breathing, and on the way the ores cut through the water.
Hermione steadily increased the pace until she physically couldn’t lift her arms. Slowly she tilted the ores into the small boat and glided across the water. The boat continued to move as Hermione’s emotions and fears finally sunk it’s claws into her heart, into her very soul. Dropping her head, she let out a scream as her tears spilled over. “Is this what I get for taking a chance?” she cried out in between sobs. When the sobbing finally lessened to sniffles, Hermione started to row again, but this time with less enthusaiasum. She tried to focus on the rest of her row, but was unable to get back into a proper rhythm. She decided to give up just as the boat was making its way into the boat house.
Jumping out as soon as the boat came to a stop, she made her way to the edge of the dock just as the sun was beginning to rise. Instead of going through her normal yoga routine, she decided to switch it up with Tai Chi. Perhaps the fluidity would help focus her. During the next hour, Hermione became one with her environment, completely focused while flowing from one pose to the other, and never noticed that Harry was watching her for the last half hour with his Firebolt leaning up against him.
“When did you pick up Tai Chi?” Harry asked as he moved his broom from one shoulder to the other.
Hermione turned with a shrug and replied, “I had some free time on my hands and wanted to master something new. What are you doing up so early? I would have thought you would have been exhausted after Fleur’s punishments.” Hermione had a twinkle in her eyes as she wagged her brows at him.
Harry blushed at the suggestion and was unable to speak for a moment as he remember all the tiny details from their romp last night. He cleared his throat and asked, “How bad were the nightmares?” He looked her over closely and carefully. Seeing her red, puffy eyes he instantly became serious and asked, “What happened?”
Hermione shook her head, not wanting to talk about it just yet. “Look, I’m going to do some more running. I know that’s why you brought your broom.” She frowned as Harry stepped in front of her. “I just want to finish my workout Harry.”
She tried once more to step around Harry only to be stopped again. Harry’s expression may have meant business, but his tone was warm, gentle and comforting. “Talk to me Mione. What happened last night? I’m your brother and will always be here for you.” He took a step forward and put his hands on her shoulders as he said, “Stop locking me out. That is supposed to be my job, you’re supposed to be the one who talks sense. Any other time I would have let you be, but I’m telling you right now Hermione Jean… I won’t let you… Not this time.”
Harry felt Hermione’s legs begin to give way, and thanks to his amazing reflexes he was able to easily catch her. He could see the anxiety climbing in her eyes. That wasn’t what shocked him though. It was the hurt and betrayal that was hiding behind it. “Where to start?” Hermione muttered while trying to stop her body from shaking. “Once you and Fleur left that final time, Narcissa and I went to bed. I tried to head to the guest room, but she wouldn’t hear of it. I’m not sure how long I actually slept for. It started with Bellatrix, and then went to Ron. As Narcissa was trying to wake me, I heard her.” Harry tightened his hold around her to show his silent support as he tried to comfort her. There was more to say, and he knew that. But he wasn’t about to push her. She would tell him when she was ready. “Narcissa woke me and tried to comfort me. She begged me to take a vial she floated over, telling me that it would calm me. Apparently, there was something else in it. She mentioned something about a sedative. Instantly, my eyes became heavy.” Hermione jumped to her feet as anger and rage began to pump through her veins. “I told her I didn’t like taking potions. I was locked in my dreams Harry. I was stuck reliving the most traumatic time in my life dammit!”
Harry felt a warm breeze begin to pick up and realized he was in knee deep. He wrapped his arms around her and she tried wiggle free and fight him. Tightening his hold, he said, “The only way to find out why is to speak to her. But in order to do that, you need to calm down.”
“Let me go Harry!” Hermione screamed.
“Not until you calm down. For all I know, you could make the bloody school explode.” Harry replied. “Once you do calm down enough, we can find Narcissa and find out why. She must have had a good reason for it.”
“You are all too right Harry.” A warm voice said from behind them.
Hermione broke free from Harry’s arms and whirled around to face Narcissa. “How could you do that to me! I was stuck in my nightmares!”
Narcissa took a few steps forward and said, “I promise you that I can explain it all if you let me. I’m sorry that you were stuck. I made a promise to protect you, and in the process of attempting to, I let you down.”
Hermione’s shoulders tensed as she asked, “Why?”
Harry looked a little uncomfortable and tried to move away and head back into the castle and to Fleur. Narcissa’s eyes quickly flicked over to him as she said, “Please stay. You should here this as well and Fleur already knows part of it. Since she is standing right behind me, she can hear the rest of my tale.”
Fleur blushed slightly at being caught, but said nothing as she went to stand with Harry, stopping briefly to squeeze Hermione’s shoulder. “Before we get to the potion, I should tell you the reason why I created it. Everyone knows that my marriage was arranged. What you don’t know is that it was supposed to be to Andromeda, not me. When she left, it fell to me. I did the only thing I could, what I was conditioned for, to serve my family. It was expected of me to be a proper Pure Blood wife and provide an heir. Before Draco, I had two miscarriages. Each time I was… punished. After Draco, everything changed. I was punished for not dressing correctly, or attempting to be a mother to my son. During the first war, when the gold wasn’t enough, he used me. If I spoke out against him, not only would he verbally attack me, it was also physical. I developed a calming draught that contained a sedative, to take on certain nights.”
Narcissa went to kneel in front of a quiet Hermione who was sitting on the grass a few steps away from Harry and Fleur. “I thought it would help you like it helped me. We both know that you would never have been able to get back to sleep otherwise. Can you forgive me for trying to help?”
Hermione stared blankly passed Narcissa and at her all at the same time. After a few minutes of silence, Narcissa began to worry and tried to pull away, but Hermione’s hand shot out to stop her. “I can understand why you did it, and can forgive you.” She saw the tension leave Narcissa’s body with those three words. “But you have to let me fight my own demons. I told you that I didn’t like to take potions, and this is the reason why.”
Narcissa helped Hermione stand up and while pulling her into her arms asked, “What can I do? How can I help?”
Hermione gave her a small smile and made no move to step out of Narcissa’s embrace as she replied, “Stand by and support me. Everything you are already doing. Breakfast should be starting soon, let’s head in. Minerva prefers us to be there for the first few mornings. Thankfully today is Sunday and classes don’t start until tomorrow.”
Narcissa tucked a defiant curl behind Hermione’s ear and said, “That sounds like a plan. Do you need to change before we head to the Great Hall?”
Hermione gave her a small smile as she leaned into Narcissa’s touch and replied, “I’ll cast a few charms and transfigure my cloths. I wouldn’t want anyone to be uncomfortable with me showing this much leg.”
Fleur snorted when she heard this and said, “They do realize that a Veela is a part of the staff right?” Everyone laughed as the heavy mood began to melt away, and the two couples walked arm and arm towards the Great Hall for what was turning into an already interesting morning.