Chapter Text
“What are you bringing to the wedding?” San asks once Wooyoung reenters the room, wiping his hair down from a shower.
It’s spring again; some point in April and it continues to rain gently outside despite the sun.
“I don’t know, something from the registry.” The younger answers, opening his clothing drawer to fish for some boxers. “But what do you even get someone who’s rich?”
“You know it’s probably just Yeosang asking for stuff, right?” San grins, watching Wooyoung turn around with a mischievous look.
“The gift will just be me, then.” Wooyoung cackles, padding over to San and lying on top of him, pressing down on the mattress. “I’ll wrap myself in a bow and then they’ll have to keep me in their sure-to-be expensive house.”
“You’re terrible.” San laughs, squishing Wooyoung’s face in his hands.
“Is it so bad to want to freeload off of my best friend so that I could see you whenever I want?” Wooyoung sticks a finger in San’s nose annoyingly, causing the older to yelp. “If you help maybe it would work, maybe they’d think I’m a dog or something.”
San hums as if he is thinking about it, running his hands through Wooyoung’s damp hair.
“If you allow me to join in, I’ll act as a cat and they’ll never know.” The younger smiles impishly before kissing San wetly right as Yunho walks in.
“Get a room you guys.” The brunette teases, throwing his school bag on the floor before flopping on his mattress with a loud exhale.
“Wish we could, Yunho.” Wooyoung chirps noisily. “But guess you’ll just have to deal with us being gross in here until we graduate.”
“One more month.” Yunho exhales, fist in the air.
“You’re going to miss me.” Wooyoung teases. “You’re going to go home and then you’re going to cry because you miss seeing my pretty little face every morning.”
“Yes, I, Jeong Yunho, am going to wake up every morning in painstaking turmoil because I will miss Jung Wooyoung so much that I will be rendered useless.” The brunette drawls sarcastically, scrolling through his phone.
“Was that so hard to admit?”
“Very.” Yunho laughs, getting up to ruffle Wooyoung’s hair. “I’m going to get food, y’all want anything?”
“No, thank you.” The two answer in unison, settling for just melting into one another.
Yunho leaves and the two settle, silent breathing filling the room.
“I’m going to miss you.” Wooyoung whispers against the constellation on San’s neck. “Why does your major stink?”
“I don’t know,” San answers just as quietly, petting Wooyoung. “I’m going to miss you, too.”
“Let’s have fun while we can, okay?” Wooyoung sits up, brushing San’s hair out of his face. It’s back to black and hangs over his eyes (but he doesn’t mind since Wooyoung loves it so much). “Whatever happens happens, but we should have fun and enjoy life, okay? No more sad talk.” He places another kiss on San’s lips and stays there, solid and firm against San.
“Okay,” The words tumble clumsily out of San’s mouth. “Yeah, okay.”
“Good?” Wooyoung asks, holding out his pinky that San easily takes with his own.
“Good.”
And just like that, Wooyoung is kissing him again, until their laughter leaves them breathless.
------------------------
Graduation day goes by in a flash.
The post graduation ceremony started with Yeosang hugging San so hard that he couldn’t breathe, the brunette apologizing for his past behavior but also claiming that ‘If you ever hurt Wooyoung like that again I will personally punch your teeth in’ between sparkling tears that somehow made him look prettier. Seonghwa hugged Yeosang right after, telling him just how proud he was of him, but that just made Yeosang cry even more.
“I’m going to marry this guy!” Yeosang shouted loudly, tears falling down his cheeks and causing Seonghwa to blush bashfully before he kissed his fiancee. Their parents simply laughed it off, giving the couple a moment while they chatted amongst themselves.
When San looked away he could see Mingi, big and loud and spinning Hongjoong around. The shorter made a sound of discomfort even though he was smiling, big and wide and full of love while he playfully punched at Mingi’s shoulder.
The couple chatted for a bit before Mingi’s family ran over and hugged them both, just as loud and boisterous as he is (and for once Mingi looks shy, scratching at his head while his mother praised Hongjoong).
“Hey, you.” Wooyoung’s voice cut in, causing San to turn around.
It was a whirlwind after that; from meeting Wooyoung’s family, to being invited out to dinner, to having Wooyoung’s mother bless him as the one for Wooyoung ( “Yeosangie is getting married!” She exclaimed over dinner, throwing back a shot of soju. “I wonder when my little baby is going to get married, too.” She gave the two of them a knowing look and they laughed awkwardly, tring to brush it off).
That’s how San finds himself here, in Wooyoung’s dorm, like he always does.
“I’m sorry about that,” Wooyoung sighs, taking off his cap and gown and throwing it to the side. “She means well, she’s just… excited.”
“It’s okay.” San reaches forward and grabs at Wooyoung’s hand, pulling him towards him. Wooyoung looks at him, eyes shiny in the low light of his room.
Wooyoung is beautiful.
“Did you have fun?” He asks, but his eyes are focused on San’s lips, licking his own.
“I did.” San answers truthfully, making Wooyoung look at him. “I’m so proud of you.” The younger smiles prettily, looking at San’s lips again, then back at his eyes.
“Thank you.” He whispers, moving his hand so that it holds San’s. “Can I kiss you?”
San kisses Wooyoung instead of answering.
It’s firm, underlying words hidden between them as they kiss, longues lapping over one another languidly as they just moan quietly, sweet voices mingling as hands find one another in the dark.
San has always thought Wooyoung was beautiful; from the moment he met him, to the not so great moments, and everything in between; but when Wooyoung is like this, soft and vulnerable and open underneath San?
That’s when San thinks he is the most beautiful.
The room is dark; small fragments of glittering light pouring in through the open blinds decorating the planes of Wooyoung’s caramel skin.
It’s quiet save for their bated breaths, Wooyoung’s helpless little whines being drowned out by San’s lips that kiss him so fervently.
Wooyoung is soft, from the curves of his waist and the meat of his thigh, all soft, warm skin that San adores.
“I love you, Wooyoung,” the words are spoken in the small space between them, when Wooyoung takes a moment to stop kissing San and the older catches his breath. “I really, really love you.”
He gets kissed again, and again, and again by Wooyoung, giggling in the darkness of the room when Wooyoung kisses at his beauty marks; first the one on his cheek, then the one on his eyelid.
“I love you, too.” Wooyoung whispers, letting the words spill from his mouth and into San’s. “You’re mine, Sannie, I really do love you, my pretty little doll.” and he means it, expression screaming of adoration even in the shade of the room.
“I’m yours,” Wooyoung kisses San before he can continue, hands holding San’s face as if he’s the most fragile thing in the world (and maybe he is, with the way Wooyoung makes him feel featherlight). “I love you so much, so, so, so much .”
Another laugh and the slide of slips and everything feels explosive, fireworks bursting in the space they inhabit.
San loves Wooyoung; beautiful, pretty Wooyoung, who bites his lip prettily when San fucks into him just right, who whines cutely and hides his face bashfully, who looks ethereal when the light hits him just right.
Beautiful.
Wooyoung cums with a soundless moan, clinging to San needily as he rides it out, nails digging into San’s broad back until he can finally gain his composure and only make little whines due to sensitivity.
“Can I fuck your thighs?” San breathes out against the swell of Wooyoung’s lower lip and all Wooyoung can do is nod, whining cutely when San pulls out and repositions them so that Wooyoung’s thighs are pressed together against San’s chest.
San doesn’t last long, not when Wooyoung squeezes his thighs and licks his lips and everything is this dangerous mix of soft, wet and warm, making San cum with a choked off sound.
It’s messy and wet; sticky cum and sweat shining on Wooyoung’s soft thighs and San can feel his dick twitch in newfound arousal (he’s pathetic, he knows).
He moves then, tries to get away so that he can clean them up, but Wooyoung drags him back down with an indignant huff and a lazy kiss that leaves San’s head spinning.
It’s when they’re lying there and kissing dreamily that Wooyoung speaks up.
“I’m so happy I met you.” He says, the spaces between San’s fingers glowing pink wherever Wooyoung kisses them. “I really am, San.”
They’re there again: the petals that adorn his skin that fall from the bouquet in his chest.
Wooyoung is bathed in pink, ranging from the softest carnation to the most vivid magenta, and all San can do is stare.
“I’m happy I met you, too.” Wooyoung continues to kiss his fingers, pulling San closer to hold him. “You’re so beautiful, Wooyoung.”
“You really think?” He asks, smiling softly at San with the dreamiest expression. The older hums, brushing some hair away from Wooyoung’s sweaty forehead, inky black against soft brown.
“You’re beautiful even when you just wake up and you have eye boogers, or when you got sick freshman year and looked like death, and you’re especially beautiful when you sneeze and a whole booger comes out your nose.” Wooyoung giggles and scrunches up his shoulders and San just finds him absolutely adorable, watching as Wooyoung’s cheeks fill with mirth as squeaky laughs leave his mouth.
“You know you’re pretty too, right?” Soft fingers trace the features of San’s face as if trying to memorize them and commit them to memory. “You’re ridiculously attractive, with your pretty nose and soft lips and perfect dimples and just… everything about you is pretty.”
It’s nothing San hasn’t heard before, but that doesn’t stop the red that kisses his cheeks.
“Stop, before I kiss you.” San threatens, running a hand over Wooyoung’s soft stomach over and over in mindless patterns.
“Guess I should continue then?” Wooyoung pretends to think for a second, then looks back at San with a sly grin. “You get prettier every single day, you know? You were cute when I first met you, and now you’re like, a whole model, with your broad shoulders and tiny waist, and your pretty eyes that hold all of the stars, like my own pretty little milky way I can always look into.”
San doesn’t know how to respond, filled to the brim with love and adoration, so he kisses Wooyoung instead, laughing against his lips when Wooyoung breathes out a fake whine of protest.
“You’re a dummy,” San whispers in between their lips. “A big, beautiful dummy.”
“Mmm, but I’m your dummy, Sannie.” Soft hands hold San’s face again to deepen their kiss. “You have to deal with me.”
San wouldn’t have it any other way.
----------------------
San has only seen Yeosang cry his eyes out twice in his life: 1. When he got into a big fight with Seonghwa in their sophomore year and they almost broke up (Yeosang cried so hard that he got a headache and dry heaved from coughing so frequently. Wooyoung threatened to kick Seonghwa’s stupid nerdy ass and San just let Yeosang cry and get snot all over his shirt.) and 2. When he got into another fight, but with Wooyoung, and Wooyoung told them they weren’t friends anymore (San thinks Yeosang actually cried even harder during that, all red splotchy cheeks and loud sniffles over a bucket of chicken that San bought as a consolation piece).
So, to see Yeosang cry messily in front of everyone at his wedding is somewhat startling to say the least.
Wooyoung is standing there as Yeosang’s Best Man, sending San a look when the brunette starts to cry half-way through his vows and babbles about how much he loves Seonghwa (the older just smiles at him, like Yeosang is the only person in the room, love painted all over his face even though tears spill down his cheeks, too).
Yeosang’s cheeks are flushed red and he sniffles noisily but he gets through it, gives an entire soliloquy as to why Seonghwa is the love of his life and how lucky he is to have him, as if they were the only two people in the room and not surrounded by their friends and loved ones.
“Yeosang, my pretty little Starlight,” Seonghwa tries but it just causes Yeosang to cry all over again, big fat tears spilling down his cheeks while the older laughs.
They’re so cheesy, San thinks, smile wide on his face when he stands to clap for them once they finally finish, sealing their vows with enthusiastic I do ’s and even more eager kisses (Seonghwa holds Yeosang close and the brunette grins into it cutely).
Everything is in crystal fragments of starry white.
The party afterwards is, for lack of better word, beautiful.
Yeosang throws the bouquet, Mingi catches it, and Hongjoong gets so red that everyone laughs (“what if we got married?” Mingi suggests, loud and bright and he looks like the sun. Hongjoong merely smiled back, punching at Mingi’s chest in an attempt to hide his embarrassment that glows like the hot summer sun).
“I’m so happy you guys made it,” Yeosang begins once he’s free to walk around, hugging Wooyoung so tight that the younger yelps in shock, devolving into small giggles when Yeosang makes no show of leaving. “I really, really love you guys.”
“You’re so sentimental today, Yeosangie.” Wooyoung teases, petting the brunette’s soft hair. Seonghwa takes the moment to hug San briefly, all expensive cologne and high end threads.
“We really do owe it to you both for getting us together,” Seonghwa laughs and San thinks it’s absolutely ridiculous how stunning Seonghwa is. “If it weren’t for you two tricking us into that date, we really wouldn’t be here today.”
“I really love you guys.” Yeosang repeats, finally letting Wooyoung go only to hold his face in his hands and coo over him.
To see Yeosang so affectionate is somewhat off-putting but San laughs anyway (it’s Yeosang’s big day, he can act however the hell he wants).
When the newly-wed couple wave their good-bye, Wooyoung turns to San with eyes that sparkle like the crystal fragments that hang from the ceiling.
Beautiful.
“You look amazing today.” He breathes out, reaching out to hold San’s hand in his.
“So do you.” San responds, words escaping him and piecing together the most lackluster response imaginable. “I haven’t seen you in a while.”
“I guess you haven’t.” Wooyoung reaches behind San for a h'orderves that no doubt cost more than San’s suit. “Aren’t you glad to see me?” The food goes right into Wooyoung’s mouth while he grins naughtily.
Truth be told, San hasn’t been able to see Wooyoung since he graduated and had to go back home, too far out with Yeosang to visit as much as he would have wanted. That, accompanied by San’s grueling summer classes, had made it difficult for anything to happen.
So, seeing Wooyoung up close with fully re-dyed blond hair was something shocking for San (in the best way possible).
“Of course I am.” San smiles while Wooyoung gives him the prettiest eyes he’s ever seen. “Didn’t know you were blond again.”
“Wanted to surprise you.” Someone is singing loudly and competes with his rushing blood to see who could be the loudest. “Plus, blondes have more fun, right?”
“You’re terrible.” San laughs, taking the opportunity to kiss at Wooyoung’s cherry tinted lips that are just as sweet as they look. “Absolutely terrible, you know that?”
“Tell me something I don’t know.” They laugh and fall into one another again, soft kisses and delicate touches that bleed of pink.
“Ew, not over the snacks,” Jongho whines, nudging San away from the table with a pout. “Do that somewhere else.”
“I’ll kiss him on the table if I have to.” Wooyoung argues, pinching at Jongho’s side playfully. “I’ll just throw him on top of it and ruin everything.”
Jongho gives a laugh that oozes of sarcasm and Wooyoung sticks his tongue out at him.
Deciding to intervene, San grabs Wooyoung by the hand and guides him away from the table until they’re somewhere considerably less crowded, the only company being the silvery-white decorations that adorn the walls.
“I totally could have fought him, San. Jjong has nothing on me.”
“Sure you could have,” he brushes away the blonde strands of hair from Wooyoung’s forehead and grins. “And you totally would have left with a black eye.”
“I can’t believe you don’t believe in my fighting capabilities, Sannie.” The blond leans back against the wall, putting on his best hurt expression. “I dye my hair for you, I believe in you, and you don’t think I could beat Jongho in a fight?” He adds an over-dramatic lip wobble and San laughs loudly in the corridor, noting how it echoes off of the walls.
“You can do a lot, babe, and I love you with all of my heart, but I can’t lie to you like that.” Wooyoung sniffles loudly and pretends to cry as ugly as he can, loud wails echoing off of the corridor walls before San covers his mouth with his hand.
“Okay, okay, you can totally kick Jongho’s ass in a fight.”
“Do you mean it?” It’s clearly a trap for attention and San falls in willingly, pressing Wooyoung into the corner and grinning against his lips that still glow cherry red.
“Of course I do.”
Wooyoung kisses him, lemony sweet with sparkles of clementine.
------------
“Seems like you and Wooyoungie are doing well.” Hongjoong let’s the words slip out between taking sips of champagne.
“I could say the same about you and Mingi.” San raises his eyebrows at Hongjoong who decides to swallow the entire flute of champagne whole. “When’s the big wedding, huh? When am I getting little nieces and nephews?”
“Absolutely never, Choi San.” Hongjoong deadpans, face serious. “Never request for that again.” San laughs while Hongjoong requests for another glass.
The party is still going strong with Seonghwa dancing with Yeosang, Mingi dancing with Wooyoung, and Jongho arm wrestling what San can only assume is Seonghwa’s relative (but he can never really tell, not when both sides of the family are abnormally gorgeous).
“To answer you though, we’re doing amazingly, I just kind of miss him.” The beat of the song hums lowly in the air, vibrations dancing across the soles of San’s feet. “I’m stuck in school and he lives far away; we barely get time to see one another.”
“Hm, maybe you can move in together? Mingi practically lives in my apartment now. It’s pretty nice.”
“I wish.” San ingests a copious amount of the sparkly alcohol and makes a face (for some odd reason, he misses the devil potion Yeosang was famous for). “My major sucks and I can barely even sleep, let alone get a job. If I’m not in school, I’m trying to get all of the homework done on time. I barely even remember to eat and shower.”
“No wonder you stink so much.” Hongjoong mutters, peering over his glass at San who makes a move to try and grab at Hongjoong’s small haircut.
“ Anyway , it just all sucks a lot. I like him so damn much.” San sighs dramatically, wishing Yeosang actually did make a secret batch of hell water just so he could feel something other than a morbid cocktail of melancholy and restlessness.
“Hey man, don’t be sad, come on.” A small hand pats at San’s shoulder encouragingly. “Everything will work out, okay? Just give it time. Everything happens at its own pace, yeah?”
“You’re right.” San pats his face in an attempt to hype himself. “Yeosangie and Seonghwa got married and we are here to celebrate.”
“That’s what I’m talking about.” Hongjoong grabs at San’s hand and drags them towards the dance floor. “Now let loose and show me why Wooyoung is so obsessed with you.”
San can only laugh, dancing the night away with his best friends that feel like home.
--------------------------
“Your semester is over! Congrats, Sannie.” Wooyoung cheers loudly over the receiver, bright and bubbly and so very Wooyoung.
“Yeah, just two more to go, if I can do this right.”
“Don’t force yourself, okay? Do it at your own pace.”
“I know.” San scratches at his nose and looks at the photo on his night stand (it’s a photo of him and Wooyoung from the wedding; Wooyoung had just smeared cake frosting on his face and San had retaliated by shoving the slice back into Wooyoung’s right as the photo was taken (San thinks it’s the best photo ever taken of them.)), smiling at the memory.
“It’s winter break for you now, yeah?”
“Yeah, but I’m taking some courses so that I can catch up.”
“Catching up to what, exactly?” Wooyoung’s tone is humored but San can hear the concern underneath as it crackles through. “I’m scared you’re going to push yourself too hard.”
San doesn’t say anything, rubbing at his eyes tiredly.
“Baby?”
“I’m still here.”
“Are you okay?”
“I don’t know.”
It’s quiet again.
San is tired.
“When does your next semester start?” Wooyoung’s voice filters in quietly, soft and warm and so very pretty.
San can feel his heart thud once, twice, three times before calming down.
“January.”
“Okay.” Silence. “I love you.”
“I love you too.”
They keep talking after that; Wooyoung prattles about his daily life while San just listens.
San misses Wooyoung.
He hopes his heart doesn’t hurt as much in the morning.
---------------
“Sannie, come on, it’s New Year’s eve, you don’t have to study so hard.” San hums in response while he continues to write down his notes (he knows he should be having fun, but he can’t afford to lose his scholarship, especially since he came so close to it last semester).
His mother decides to walk into his room then, pinching at his ear until he whines in defeat.
“Get ready, Choi San. We’re having a party and your relatives want to see you, not the door to your room.”
“ Fine. ” San drawls, closing his textbook.
“Thank you, sweetie.” His mother gives him a kiss on the cheek and a beaming smile. “Dress up all handsome, okay? You don’t want to go into the New Year looking disheveled.”
“Okay, mom.”
She scurries out of the room then, singing something about the dinner she was creating for the party, and all San can do is stand there.
To say San was excited for the new year was an overstatement; to say he was loathing the new year was also an over statement.
Only two more semesters after this one, he tries to convince himself, breathing deeply. If I just suck it up and get everything done by next December, I’ll be done, and I’ll be fine.
San is in the midst of changing his shirt when he decides to check his phone for the time, the bright lockscreen of Wooyoung smiling widely at the carnival staring right back at him.
Ah. San smiles even though his eyes well up with tears that burn with yearning. I’m really not fine.
Uncertainty gnaws at San and all he can do is fiddle with his phone, wondering if he should call Wooyoung and cry about how much he misses him, or if he should just text him and ask how his day is going, or maybe he should just send him a voice message on Instagram and say just how beautiful he thinks he is.
He decides to go to Instagram, scrolling by his friends posts in an attempt to stave off of anxiety (Seonghwa posts one of those corny our wedding rings aren’t the main focus but also they are photos that also just devolve into him trying to kiss a very sleepy Yeosang that ends up pushing Seonghwa’s face away. The caption is also just some very detailed paragraph about entering the new year together or something. It makes San cringe).
Hongjoong also posts on his story, but it’s just In The Studio in script font for a good five slides before it’s pictures of Mingi smiling and Hongjoong slapping a very tiny ‘my sunflower’ at the bottom of the screen (San actually laughs at that; Hongjoong is so painfully in love, even though he denies it almost all of the time).
Yunho posts about some girl he’s seeing (the same girl from that party so long ago, San is shocked), Jongho is with his family, and Wooyoung hasn’t posted at all.
San doesn’t know why he feels anxious but he does when he opens the direct messaging tab and clicks on his conversation with Wooyoung.
This isn’t the first time he’s told Wooyoung he missed him, and it isn’t like his feelings are a secret anymore, they’re like boyfriends or something now, and he’s whined over and over again to Wooyoung about how much he will miss him.
Why is this time so different?
A knock at the door startles San out his thoughts, his mother poking her head in.
“Are you done, sweetie? I need your help in the kitchen.”
With a deep exhale San throws his phone onto his bed and follows her out of his room.
It’s easier that way.
-----------------
Everything is loud, loud, loud.
His younger cousins are screaming at one another about who gets to light the sparklers first, his older cousins keep trying to go into his room ( “Come on, San! It’s been years, we just want to see your room!”), and his family keeps asking if he has a girlfriend (because according to them “You are too young and handsome to be single!”).
San’s mother gives him a sympathetic smile, San wants to knock himself out, and it’s only fifteen before eleven.
San misses Wooyoung.
“So, you’re still in college?” His aunt asks, adjusting her glasses while she sips at champagne from the fancy collection of glassware his mother made him dig out. “When are you graduating? It’s already been four years, right?” They’re all sitting on the couches right in the middle of the living room (San wishes he got up when he had the chance).
“Oh, I’m graduating after this year. After my winter semester I have two more to go.”
“Are you sure you don’t have a girlfriend?” His uncle prods at him, laughing around a can of beer. “You could probably get married after you graduate, and have kids.”
San can feel his face pale.
“I think San can do whatever he wants after he graduates,” His mom interjects, patting him on the shoulder. “He doesn’t need to get married or have kids or anything like that, he’s still too young for all of that.”
“You’re too easy on him,” His uncle says around his can, shrugging. “All I’m saying is San could be the perfect family man.”
“Well that is for him to decide, isn’t it?”
“Sure, but he wasted so much time in this major, and he doesn’t even have a girlfriend, what is going to happen once he graduates? He’s going to get a job and be busy all of the time. Next thing you know he’s forty with no kids and alone.”
Everything feels ridiculously stuffy in the space of San’s living room, a gross mixture of green and black threatening to spill from his mouth.
“Well I don’t think that is any of your business.” His mother snaps, grip on her glass tightening. “My son can date whoever he wants and live however he wants, he doesn’t have to fit into your cookie cutter mold of life. If he ends up alone with no kids at forty, I don’t care as long as he is happy.”
“Well--”
“I don’t want to hear any more of it. You are in my house, during New Years eve no less, and you’re making my son uncomfortable. Just drop it.”
The group of adults simmer into an awkward silence before one of San’s cousins run up to their parents crying and he uses it as an opportunity to get up and leave.
“Where are you headed, sweetie?” His mother asks, eyes soft. “I’m sorry about that.”
“Just going to get some fresh air.” He answers, throwing on his jacket and trying to fight the weird feeling that settles in his chest and paints his face red.
“It’s ten before midnight, be careful, okay?” She gives San a hug and kisses him on the cheek. “I love you.”
“Love you too, mom.” With that San gives her a kiss on the head and waves, stepping over toddlers and way too many Lego’s before reaching the door, inhaling deeply before opening it and--
“Oh,” Wooyoung’s eyes are opened comedically wide, his hand lifted up mid-knock. “Happy New Year’s eve?” He tries, an awkward smile breaking out on his features. “Sorry, this was so much better in my mind.”
“Wooyoung?” The words are small and the prickling of tears are back in San’s eyes. Wooyoung is bundled up from head to toe in a ridiculous amount of clothes but he’s adorable and his cheeks are red and all San can do is laugh.
He laughs and laughs and laughs, even as tears slide down his cheek in hot little streams.
Even like this, with a little booger from the cold hanging from his nose because of the cold, Wooyoung is beautiful.
“This isn’t what I anticipated.” Wooyoung laughs awkwardly, scratching the back of his head with his gloved hand. “Why are you crying?”
“Because I missed you so damn much.” San sighs, stepping out a little more to close the door behind him. “What are you even doing here, Woo?”
“Guess I missed you too.” He smiles, puffs of air billowing from his mouth. “So I was impulsive and ran over here because I wanted to spend our first New Year’s together.”
“You’re so cheesy, you know that?” San grins, taking Wooyoung’s gloved hand in his and pulling him closer. Somewhere in the distance San can hear people counting down, loud and excited.
Ten! Nine!
“Yeah, but you love that about me.”
Eight!
“I love everything about you.”
Seven!
“Copying me, now? I love everything about you. ”
Six! Five!
“You’re terrible, you know that?”
Four!
“Yeah, but you have to deal with me.”
Three!
“I’ll do it gladly.”
Two!
“Kiss me?”
Their lips are pressed together before the shouts of the countdown are over and the neighborhood is setting off firecrackers in the dead of night.
In the inky black of night where occasional bursts of light illuminate them, everything is pink, bathing in the softest carnations and the deepest magentas.
Wooyoung is pink, pink, pink, and in turn, so is San.
Beautiful.
It’s only until a huge firework goes off that Wooyoung starts to giggle against San’s lips, smiling brightly into the kiss and patting his hands against San’s chest.
“Happy New Year.” He whispers against San’s lips, pressing another kiss there. “Your lips are so chapped.”
“Those are your lips.” San laughs, squeezing Wooyoung’s cheeks in his hands and making the younger jump. “Use chapstick.”
“I do!” The younger pouts before kissing San again and again. “You’re freezing, by the way. Why don’t we go inside? I miss your mom.” He says this while unraveling his scarf and wrapping it around San’s neck gently, making sure to bundle it around his cheeks and ears.
San feels overwhelmed (with love, he figures, because he can’t contain what he feels for Wooyoung).
“My whole family is inside, you don’t want to go in there.” Right as San says that a loud, shrill scream is heard from the inside of the house followed by a loud thump and even more screaming and all Wooyoung can do is laugh.
“You’re going to freeze out here, baby.” He worries, brows furrowing cutely.
“I’m warm with you.”
“Oh please, your hands are freezing and you’re shivering and all you’re wearing is this silly jacket.” He brushes San’s hair away from his forehead and thinks for a second, hand playing with the strands of hair. “I miss your skunk stripe. It was so cute.”
“You can dye it again if you want.”
“Really?” Brown eyes light up just like the explosive reactions above them and San can feel his heart thump wildly.
“Of course.” He pinches Wooyoung’s nose softly. “You know how to do it best.”
They kiss again, slow, before Wooyoung pulls away.
“We really should go inside somewhere, before you die of hypo-whatever.”
“Hypothermia, Wooyoung.” The younger rolls his eyes (albeit cutely). “We can probably sneak into my room.”
“Yeah okay! Let’s go.”
It takes San falling four times, Wooyoung screaming because ‘I swear I saw a rat’ , and an entire plan including math before they’re stumbling into San’s room, red faced and halfway through the window.
“That seemed easier in context,” Wooyoung huffs. “At least the padding of my coat broke our fall.”
“It broke your fall, Woo.” The older corrects and all Wooyoung can do is grin impishly, helping San into the room before shutting the window. “At least we aren’t freezing anymore.”
Wooyoung hums in response, taking off his layers and leaving only his jacket on, watching as San rushes up to lock his door, loud chattering and screams being heard from the other side.
“Your family seems fun.” He teases, sitting on San’s bed.
“They’re kind of a nightmare.” San sits next to Wooyoung and he feels like some virgin teenager in a tv show who has his crush over for the first time.
“I missed your room.” It’s quiet save for the fireworks and the music. “I missed you a lot.”
“I missed you, too.”
“I’m worried about you too, y’know.” He runs his hands through his hair and San notices how unruly it is, black roots overgrown and eating away at the blond. “Please don’t overwork yourself.”
“But--”
“No buts, Choi San.” Wooyoung punches at San’s thigh lightly. “I know you say you’re fine, but I know you aren’t. Please take care of yourself.”
“I will.” San says, trying to lean forward to kiss Wooyoung but gets pushed away instead.
“Promise me.” He huffs, lower lip jutted out cutely. “Or else I won’t kiss you or tell you my super important secret that I ran all the way here to tell you.”
“Fine, fine, I promise Wooyoung, seriously, I do.” He grabs Wooyoung’s hand and links their pinkies together. “See? I mean it. I’ll take care of myself better and I won’t compare myself to others and I’ll just be better to myself.” Wooyoung pretends to think over San’s promise, looking at their linked pinkies and humming to himself.
“I guess you have convinced me.” San jabs at Wooyoung’s side playfully until the younger giggles, crooked canine on display and making San’s weak little heart burst.
“So what secret are you talking about, Woo?” He asks, lacing their fingers together. “You got a sixth toe or something? Or an extra belly button?”
“You’re terrible.” Wooyoung deadpans. “You’d be the first to know anyway and that wouldn’t really be a secret now would it?”
“Okay, okay, I’m serious now.” San lies down and Wooyoung follows him, the both of them staring at San’s ceiling in relative silence. “What’s your secret?”
“Well, if you want to know so bad…” Wooyoung turns over to San and lies against his chest. “You know Yunho right?”
“Our dearly beloved friend who’s too tall and popular for his own good, yes.”
“Well, turns out he and his girlfriend are like, super serious or whatever, and he’s all ‘I miss my super hot girlfriend’ all the time and I, in turn, am all ‘well I miss my super hot boyfriend’ ,” San sputters a laugh and Wooyoung bites his chest. “ Anyway, we’re both crybabies who live too far from the people we like, so…”
“So?” Hands run through the mess that is Wooyoung’s hair while the younger holds off for dramatic effect.
“ So Yunho and I decided that hey, we were already roommates in college, so we decided to move closer to the city together.” San is quiet and Wooyoung awkwardly drums his fingers against San’s chest. “So, yeah. Because I miss you a lot and I also miss my friends and I just really like being here and I kind of just want to see you when I want.”
San feels like a Windows 97 PC that was thrown into a washing machine and left to dry (read as: extremely slow at processing data) and he doesn’t know what to say.
“You’re moving here? To the city?” He asks after some time, wondering if Wooyoung can hear (or maybe even feel) how fast his heart is beating.
“Yes.”
“I’m so happy.” San laughs, craning his neck so that he can look down at Wooyoung. “Hey, look at me.” The younger looks up at him and San can’t help but love everything about him. “I’m seriously so happy that you’re moving here.”
“Are you?” Wooyoung teases, trying to act like he wasn’t shy and nervous just moments ago. “Are you really happy to have me move here?”
“The happiest.”
“Prove it?”
San kisses Wooyoung, full and soft on the lips, laughing against them when Wooyoung makes a sound.
“Your lips are so chapped.” San comments but he continues to kiss him anyway, even though Wooyoung protests cutely.
“You’re still kissing me, though.” Wooyoung sighs between a kiss and squishes San’s cheeks. “Can I stay the night? Kind of ran over here on impulse.”
San laughs out a sickeningly sweet of course , bright and sweet and in turn making Wooyoung laugh, everything melting into pretty petals and soft pinks.
Wooyoung is beautiful.
(But that’s nothing new).