Chapter Text
Bucky felt an anger uncontrollable. One that festered and grew with the intensity of his thoughts. It didn’t lessen in the time he spent avoiding Steve. Only burned that much more fiercely.
He was so angry and he wasn’t sure if the anger was directed at Steve or himself. Maybe both? All he knew was that Steve’s words would not leave him. They would not relent. He thought of little else but their argument.
For three days Bucky avoided Steve. Every time he caught his scent in the air nearing, Bucky would bolt. He’d hide away until Steve gave up his pursuit, and then he’d wait for a cursing Clint to catch up. Usually the omega was so out of breath his curses came off as pitchy gasps. Only, as soon as he rightened himself it would follow a stealthy kick to Bucky’s hind leg (or human leg), a heavy step on his tail (or his human foot), sometimes even a accidental arrow poke to his side. Bucky always met Clint’s retaliation with a threatening growl that led nowhere as the smugly grinning omega gave half-assed apologies. Clint was a cocky son of a bitch who knew Bucky’s wolf was overly fond of him. It seemed that nothing the omega did would ever cause his wolf to lose its temper with him.
Steve was the reason Bucky was now hiding out at Peter’s place. The omega was less likely to visit him there. Steve had never really gotten along with omegas- Bucky knew- especially those that were gone on Bucky. Steve tended to steer clear of them, not because he was intimidated or felt uneasy by them. No, Steve stayed away from them because if he witnessed an omega growing more friendly than was appropriate with his alpha, his inner wolf would come to the forefront. Bucky could recall just how feisty Steve became the few times an omega daringly moved into his personal space and laid a hand on him with want in their eyes. Those instances usually ended with Bucky pulling a scrappy and possessive Steve away from an irate omega.
So Bucky highly doubted Steve would come for him here with Peter. Steve didn’t like how he became when he got like that and he certainly wouldn’t want to become a possessive omega against Peter. Peter was a minor, not to mention that to everyone else, he appeared to be a defenseless civilian. No one knew just how strong the unassuming teen was.
Bucky stayed with Peter for as long as he could before going back to the compound where he spent the remainder of his time hiding out in the woods, or barricading himself in his room to remain clear of Steve and his insistence that they needed to talk.
It was on the third night that Peter wanted to go out around the town with him. He wanted to go to a club that several teens he knew had gone to. Bucky couldn’t fathom why it was Peter wanted to go. Well, that wasn’t true. Bucky remembered being a kid and the antics he’d get himself involved in, but then again he’d had Steve. Steve who always obeyed his mother and never strayed from her words. Steve was one of the most stubborn people Bucky had ever known. He’d never done what others wanted or expected of him. He only ever followed his moral campus, that and Sarah Rogers words. Steve’s mother was as important as God and country to the omega. So whenever Bucky would attempt to do something Steve disapproved of Bucky would obey his omega’s word. Because much like Steve obeyed his mother because he held her to the highest esteem, so to did Bucky feel for Steve. Even though he’d flash those of his past with a devilish smile and played up to the confident and cocky alpha he was, he’d always, always stayed in line, because Steve wanted it so. He never went out to late night parties and establishments that were bound to be up to no good.
Bucky told this to Peter. That the young omega didn’t have to go along with what others his age were doing. Bucky would go if Peter honestly wanted to go, but he didn’t feel it was right. Peter hadn’t been pleased, but surprisingly he’d given in and agreed he wouldn’t go. Bucky was right. There was no need to participate in activities that held no other importance to him but for the fact that others his age wished to rebel.
Now that Peter canceled their plans on going out to the city that evening, Bucky decided he’d spend the night out in the woods. Bucky roamed the woods for a good while with Clint not to far behind him, before he found himself where he always did at the end of his exploration of the woods, the lake. Laying out in the area he’d more than certainly claimed as his own to the rest of the creatures of the woods, Bucky stared calmly at the quiet lake. Clint sighed, bored, before sitting himself beside Bucky’s flank and wordlessly leaned into him receiving warmth and giving off comfort. He’d learned rather quickly Bucky’s wolf needed some TLC and would give it because he was one of the few who Bucky would allow to.
Bucky hummed contentedly, his large snout tilted up and at Clint, his silver blue eyes staring softly as he snuffled with contentment. Clint snickered at his show of appreciation.
“Yeah, yeah. I know. Just don’t get too insistent on the scenting. My oldest pup keeps insisting I’m a two timing hussy. You’re lucky my alpha defends me and is so trusting.”
Bucky snorted at Clint’s words and to piss the omega off just a bit, his long wet tongue delved out to lick Clint’s face completely, in one long swipe.
“Oh come on!” Clint shot up from his seat and proceeded the wipe his now drenched face with his bare sleeves. “Ugh! I swear to God I’d shoot your furry butt with my arrow right now if it didn’t mean having a crazed omega wolf on my ass.”
Bucky sighed unhappily at the mention of his estranged husband and lowered his head over his one paw dejectedly. Clint paused mid-wiping of his face to glance down as the depressed wolf and sighed just as heavily as the wolf had.
“Sorry.” Clint grumbled, partly upset with having wolf slobber on himself and partly remorseful for being the reminder of what pained the alpha wolf.
Taking his seat once more, Clint wiped at his slightly less damp face and spoke reassuringly to the wolf beside him.
“You know I didn’t mean it.”
Bucky huffed a breath as a confirmation of that statement.
“I know you don’t want to talk about it and I really don’t want to intrude on your guys’ lovers spat and all, but... You could be a little kinder in your approach to Steve.”
Bucky grumbled unhappily, his upper lip revealing his sharp canines.
“I told you I know you don’t want to talk about it, but you weren’t here to see Steve when he’d thought you were gone. The guy was a complete mess without you, and now that you’re here, he is a completely different kind of mess.”
Bucky shut his eyes and pretended to be asleep. Maybe if he didn’t respond long enough, Clint would believe him and shut up.
“Fine, be that way, but I know you can hear me.” Clint shot out with frustration.
For a long moment neither vocalized a response, until Clint couldn’t take it any longer and filled the silence.
“All I’m trying to say is right now you both are miserable apart. It might not be so bad to be miserable together, at least then you might derive some comfort and happiness between the hurt. I can see that you both want each other, no matter how painful it is to admit- and ah, hell, I’m probably the worst at giving advice since my alpha is the sense of reason in our relationship, but- I know. Forget it.”
Bucky’s eyes remained closed as Clint rose from beside him again and went to the the direction of the lake. As the omega proceeded to wash his face and arms with the cold lake water, Bucky contemplated the omega’s advice. It wasn’t all that clearly spoken, but the sentiment went across clear enough that Bucky thought it over.
Clint was right. Apart, both Bucky and Steve were miserable without each other. Together they might be able to make something work. Touching and scenting were their main issue, but the times they’d spent in each other’s company. Shopping, going out to eat together, spending Hanukkah in each other’s company... Even though they’d been hurting and miserable in certain ways, they had also felt contentment and joy in others.
Then there had been Christmas, before Anthony Stark had arrived and Bucky had scent marked Steve for the first time after being reunited and it had hurt, but it had felt so good. His heart had throbbed with pain at the scenting of pine, but in that same moment his heart had felt full of warmth by the scent of rosewood.
Maybe Bucky didn’t need to break their bond? Maybe he had to accept that being hurt and reminded of Steve’s betrayal wasn’t the end of their marriage? If he focused on the love and rosewood long enough, the pain and betrayal he felt when scenting pine would grow bearable.
All at once Bucky understood what Dr. Hughes was trying to make him realize by focusing on the scent of pine. There was hope. Bucky just hadn’t realized that the fix wasn’t being able to ignore pine, but to accept it as a part of Steve’s scent now. He couldn’t fix his ability to scent so well, but he could fix his approach and if... if he told Steve what he was trying to do with his therapist... If he told him about his scent therapy, about Peter being his partner and working through the same issues, maybe Steve could be there to help him through it as well?
Bucky was up and running in the direction of the compound, forgetting all about Clint as the omega called after him. Bucky didn’t remember finding his clothes in a pile set beside thick bushes or morphing back into his human form, nor did he recall entering the compound and exiting the elevator doors leading him to Steve’s and Sam’s floor.
He did however remember his heightened sense of smell picking up the scent of an omega approaching heat. It wasn’t just any approaching heat, but Steve’s own. The scent of rosewood had grown stronger, mixed with a yeasty sweetness and the scent of burning sugar. The scent of slick production stopped Bucky dead in his tracks, just several feet from the elevator he stepped out of. Now standing frozen in the center of the lobby that divided the floor between Steve’s and Sam’s courters.
“You can’t keep doing this to yourself.”
Bucky heard Sam say and realized that Steve wasn’t alone in his courters, but that another alpha was within it. Something in Bucky’s stomach gave a sickening lurch at that. His inner alpha, no matter how betrayed he felt didn’t like the idea of his mate being in the same room as another alpha when he smelled of pre-heat.
“He’s right Steve. You already told Barnes everything and he wouldn’t offer to help you. You need to think about what is best for you.”
Bucky felt his fangs lengthen as Natasha’s voice rang out through the distance. Natasha and Sam were in Steve’s living area attempting to convince him to what? Be with another alpha? Anthony Stark?
After all Natasha had said about regretting pushing Steve to move on she was doing it, again. True, Bucky had rejected Steve and even threatened to break their bond, but he’d come back now to make amends for it. To apologize for his anger and hurt pushing them apart and to ask Steve for his understanding and care.
“I can’t. If Bucky finds out he’d kill Tony and he’d never forgive me. I can’t. I won’t.”
“You told us he wants to break the bond, Steve. There is no salvaging a relationship after that. Why should you suffer, when he has so clearly ended your relationship?” Sam expressed sympathetically. “We don’t want to see you suffer anymore.”
“I’ll... I’ll think about it.” Steve’s soft reply felt like a knife piercing Bucky’s side.
Inhaling a sharp breath of pain, Bucky’s sense of self worth declined further. He felt at the lowest of lows by Steve’s acceptance. Sure it hadn’t been an outright confirmation, but Steve hadn’t stuck firm in his refusal. He’d left room for contemplation and a possible ‘yes’. When he’d explained time and time again how he would never have taken another alpha if he’d known Bucky was alive, and even now that he did Steve still...
So quickly? So easily? Steve had given in too soon, and all as Bucky had come to terms with his feelings and actually decided to do something about it. Now... Now was the time to make his presence known. To demand Steve give him the chance to redeem himself. To see if there was still something worth saving between them.
Bucky did none of those things, because doubt took hold of him. If Steve could give in so easily to their persuasions, if Steve could feel that it was all fine and well to sleep with another person besides their bond mate, then this Steve wasn’t his bond mate. His Steve Rogers had only had eyes for him. His Steve never looked at another alpha. His Steve would not stray from what was right. And this was wrong. This Steve Rogers was the shadow of his bond mate. This Steve Rogers was wrong. Terribly and utterly wrong.
A dark rumble of rage vibrated from his chest and filled the room in it’s ominous call. After, there came a moment of dead silence before several things took place in a matter of seconds. The first being the wavering gasp of his name from that voice that should feel familiar, but was wrong. Then his cell phone vibrated from within his right side pocket and Bucky angrily turned away from the direction of Steve’s quarters to enter the still open elevator.
The sound of something large crashing rang out from a short distance, then the panicked cry of, “Bucky!” coming from the wrong voice, belonging to the wrong omega.
Bucky turned to face the doors, clicked the button leading down to the first floor, and met the dark blue eyes of Steve’s as the omega turned a corner. The omega paused in his pursuit at the sight of him, only for a moment before his eyes turned pleading and he rushed for the elevator as the doors begun to shut.
Steve was not far from him. The doors were slowly sliding shut, but Steve would make it before they closed and Bucky didn’t want that. Steve had chosen what he’d always known he would choose. Steve Rogers of the twenty first century was not his Steve Rogers of the past. This Steve thought sex and love were two different things. This Steve thought that an omega could sleep with another person if their mate couldn’t be there for them. This Steve spoke of loving and waiting and being patient with him, that sex wasn’t necessary, and yet he’d agreed to have relations yet again with Stark.
Bucky felt his stomach roil with hostility, felt his body tremble with the need to destroy, felt his eyes strain and sting and his vision blurred. He wanted Steve to enter this elevator, he wanted to slam him against the wall of it, all so he could wrap his cold metal hand around his throat and watch as the life drained from his eyes. The Winter Soldier wanted to hurt his mission for hurting him. The alpha wanted to hurt his omega for hurting him. James wanted to hurt Steve for hurting him.
But of all three identities James Buchanan Barnes was, the only one that didn’t want to cause physical harm to Steve, was the most human of himself, Bucky. So Bucky hurt himself just as much as he hurt Steve as the omega neared the closing doors of the elevator.
The omega’s arm stretched out in a desperate attempt to stop the doors from closing and to get to his alpha.
“Stop!” Bucky snarled in his most deadly of tones, his alpha voice ringing out clear as day. “Don’t follow me.”
Bucky watched as horror filled those deep blue eyes, took pleasure in seeing Steve retract his outstretched arm as if it had been burned and met those eyes that wanted from him what Bucky would never give. Bucky was done. He’d had it. Screw therapy. Screw trying. Screw the twenty first century. Everything only ever led to more struggle and pain. Bucky was done with it all, because no matter if he had the capability to forgive, he could not accept that Steve would so easily contemplate adultery- damn their separation. His sincerity and admission of loving him was false if he could so easily leave him to be in another alpha’s bed.
“Buck-“
Bucky growled at that tone. No longer would he let himself give. He would not be susceptible to that tone, to this Steve. This Steve was not his mate. This Steve would never be his mate again. So, Bucky thought of the worst he could say in the few seconds before the elevator doors shut and hissed a murderous, “I’m done with you.”
Bucky didn’t get to see Steve’s response to his words because in that moment the elevator doors shut and he was left in the silence of the elevator alone.
His cell phone vibrated once more and this time Bucky took full notice of it. Retrieving it from his pocket doubtful it could be Steve as he’d just left him and his phone had previously vibrated before.
Bucky immediately answered the phone the moment he read the name on the screen.
“Peter.” Bucky husked out his greeting as his heart and throat felt soar.
There was no reply but for the trembling breaths on the other line and that cleared away everything else Bucky had been feeling, until all he could think about was Peter and his growing worry as the silence continued.
“Peter? What is it? What’s wrong?” Bucky rushed out as the elevator doors opened and he rushed for the exit of the compound.
Originally he’d wanted to go out for a long run, away from this place that felt more and more like a hell to him. But now his worry for Peter was making him prioritize his needs and right now, what he needed was to go to Peter, because something wasn’t right.
“Peter!” Bucky snapped as he exited the building and caught sight of Clint from a distance. The man didn’t look pleased to see him, huffing out of breath and glaring at him from where he was marching towards him. Bucky had left Clint high and dry in the forrest and the man must have ran the whole way back to the compound worried what he’d been such in a rush to do.
“Bucky.” Peter sobbed, voice choked up and sending his alpha instincts on high alert.
“Where are you?” Bucky demanded.
“Home.” Peter softly sobbed. “I messed up. I went out to a bar and... I... I need you-“
“I’m coming.” Bucky answered. “Just wait for me. I’ll be there.”
“Okay.” Peter shakily acknowledged, overwhelmed by the assurance that Bucky was coming.
Bucky hung up the phone just as Clint made it near to him.
“You lousy son of a bitch. What the hell was so important-“
“I need to go to the city.”
Clint paused at Bucky’s declaration.
“At this hour? Where do you plan- Hey! Where are you going?” Clint called out when Bucky headed for the direction of the cars.
“I’m going to the city. If you won’t take me, then I’ll take myself!” Bucky snarled.
“Of course I’ll take you, these shitty Avengers don’t like to do shit, so I’m left watching your sorry ass. Come on pup, let’s take my car.”
Bucky didn’t have it in him to throw out insults to match Clint’s own, he was filled with worry for Peter. Getting to the omega and reassuring himself that he was alright was all that mattered right now. His love life crumbling around him could wait until after he checked on Peter.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
When Bucky arrived in front of Peter’s apartment complex, he didn’t answer Clint’s question on how long he intended to stay. Partly because he didn’t know, and another part of himself, his alpha protective side told him he would refuse to leave until he was sure that Peter was truly alright. The way he sounded on the phone left his heart aching and his inner wolf on edge, needing to make things right once more. To ensure that he never would hear that pain in the omega’s voice again.
Bucky didn’t remember getting out of the car, nor making his way up to Peter’s floor, only how hard he banged on the omega’s door and shouted out for the omega to open it. Peter did open the door, but not quick enough for his nerves.
He hadn’t spared a word, merely shoved the omega back inside of the kids safe haven, his den, and locked the door behind him before beginning his inspection of the tearful omega. Upon meeting his gaze, Peter had broken down, tears appearing to smear across his flushed cheeks. His eyes already red, evidence it wasn’t the first time he’d cried that day.
Bucky scanned the omega’s body looking for any sign injury to explain if the tears were brought on by physical pain, but found none. Inhaling noisily, sniffing at the omega, Bucky attempted to find anything amiss and was stunned when he did.
“Who?” Bucky snarled angrily, grasping a hold of the child’s left arm and inhaling his forearm where he scented another alpha’s scent there.
“Bucky.” Peter whined, curling inward. Not wanting to speak through his silent sobs. He only wanted Bucky to reassure him, comfort him. He didn’t need the Winter Soldier to scent out the one who caused his pain and seek some kind of revenge for the hurt he was going through. It wasn’t that alpha’s fault. Not really.
“Please, I need your scent.” Peter’s hushed whisper was so broken and hidden in the breathless sobs, that Bucky nearly missed it with his sensitive hearing.
Shutting his eyes tightly, Bucky bit back the growl of his inner wolf, calming the need for that alpha’s blood, and without thought brought the omega against his chest.
The soft needing keen Peter released as he nosed against the alpha’s scent gland, shifted something within. Any need to hunt out that alpha disappeared in that instant and was replaced with the need to soothe the fearful omega within his arms.
“Okay.” Bucky cooed huskily wrapping his arms around Peter’s trembling shoulders and turned his nose into the mess of hair before him, nuzzling the frightened pup. “I’m here. Shhh, it’s alright. I’m here.”
Small nibble fingers wrapped tightly around the cloth of his shirt at his back and yanked at it, pulling it, bringing Bucky against the omega’s body. The sharp whimper released against the skin of his neck moved Bucky’s wolf. It had been so long since someone needed him so desperately. Peter needed him. Needed not only him physically, but the omega needed his wolf’s presence.
Vibrating a low rumble of comfort, Bucky’s wolf answered that plea, “I’m here, Peter.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Bucky wasn’t sure how long they stood there, Bucky softly running his hands up and down Peter’s neck as the omega dampened his neck, all while inhaling his scent and marking his scent gland seeking comfort, but he didn’t care. Eventually though, Peter began to slacken in his hold, his sobs became more and more soft, until they ceased and left even softer sniffles.
“Peter?” Bucky gently called.
“Mm?”
“Are you ready to talk?”
Peter shook his head as he reluctantly removed himself from the security of Bucky’s scent gland to meet his eyes. Bucky exhaled a displeased sigh at the sight of Peter’s eyes, swollen. Cheeks blotched red. Lower lip trembling softly with the effort to restrain more tears from being.
“Gosh kid.” Bucky breathed and hurriedly wiped away the stray dampness that lingered on the omega’s face.
What the hell happened?
Lowering his eyes, Peter took hold of Bucky’s hand as he finished wiping the remains of tears away from his face and turned to lead Bucky with the hold he had on his hand. The alpha did not protest and simply followed the omega into his bedroom. A part of him wanted to protest to the act, but as he watched Peter release his hold and slipped under the sheets of the bed, he held back by the look the omega sent him. Peter looked exhausted, but also so afraid to be without his presence.
Bucky stared down at the space of the bed that Peter obviously left for him and bit his tongue at the silent request. This was a rather strange situation to be in, but Peter was his scenting partner. For months they’d worked together and built up a trust for one another and their scents. Peter had always been there for him. Always there to help him when he was down and needing comfort. Because of Peter there was a hope he could get over his scenting issues with Steve, not that it mattered now, seeing as Steve had made his choice. Still, Peter had never said no to him and now he needed him.
“Please. I... I just want to sleep with your scent. I’m so tired.” Peter all but begged.
Bucky shut his eyes at the pain that filled Peter’s voice. It had been so long since he’d had a pack and right now one of the two he considered his pack members needed his alpha presence and comfort. Nodding with affirmation, Bucky moved to lay himself over the covers on his back and let Peter curl himself around him. Peter wrapped one arm over his waist, his head resting on his left shoulder as he nosed at Bucky’s scent gland. Letting out a heavy exhale, Bucky felt as Peter noticeably relaxed against him and it wasn’t soon after that the omega fell into a deep sleep.
Bucky lay there as still as he could be, staring at the ceiling and contemplating how this situation was wrong in so many ways. Maybe in todays society it was normal for omega and alpha friends to spend time together, even sleep next to one another, but not in his time. Sure an omega and alpha could be friends, but never was it acceptable for them to scent each other’s scent glands or share a bed. Bucky had accepted Peter as his scent partner, but scenting of the neck was only acceptable for the most difficult of situations. Bucky had only done so with Peter less than a handful of times, and never as long as Peter was doing with him. Bucky knew Peter expected him to stay the night like this and he would because whatever had happened with Peter had been terrible as he needed Bucky in such a way. But by morning they would be reeking of each other and it would take many showers until the scent left. It wasn’t a bad scent. No, Peter smelled undeniably good, but still... It would be the first time he’d been truly scent marked by anyone besides his ex-omega Steve. It felt like a betrayal, even after what he’d heard Steve talking about with his friends.
The piercing chirp of his cell startled him from his thoughts and Bucky hurriedly retrieved it from his pocket. He needed to silence it as not to wake the still slumbering Peter, the omega needed his rest.
Glancing at the screen, Bucky realized Clint was the one to have texted him.
Mint Goodness (Clint Barton):
Uh- It’s been like three hours. How long are you planing on staying up there?
Bucky clenched his eyes. Fuck. He’d forgotten about Clint. Glancing down at the sleeping Peter, looking so relaxed and at peace, Bucky knew he couldn’t leave him, and sent a quick reply.
I’m staying the night.
It wasn’t even a full minute, before Clint responded.
Mint Goodness (Clint Barton):
WTF? Are you serious?
Bucky frowned at the text, not understanding the first part, but feeling the need to assure the omega that he was in fact serious.
Yes
Again, Clint replied quickly.
Mint Goodness (Clint Barton):
You do realize that I have to report back to Steve and he’s already been blowing up my phone for updates. He also knows we’re here.
Bucky inhaled a deep breath, full of frustration and exhaled it just as deeply.
Screw Steve.
Mint Goodness (Clint Barton):
Correction: He will be thinking you’re doing that with that jail-bait omega up there. Hell, I wouldn’t be surprised if he bursts his way in there.
Bucky growled angrily. Screw Steve. He’d been fucking another alpha for who knows how many heats before realizing he was alive, Bucky didn’t need to explain himself. He’d done so much for Steve. He’d tried so god-damn hard to heal himself and he got burned for it every time. He didn’t care anymore. Bucky would quit scent therapy if not for Peter who needed him.
Tell him that he isn’t my mate anymore and if he tries to come up here I’ll make sure he regrets it.
Bucky put his phone on silent then and tossed it onto the bedside counter. The noise was louder than he thought it would be and Peter whined softly against him, his arm around his waist tightening. Bucky hushed him kindly and stroked Peter’s hair with his hand calming the pup to slumber.
“Sleep.” Bucky urged and the omega complied.
Bucky remained awake for awhile longer, before he too found himself falling into the calming darkness of sleep.