Chapter Text
“Are you feeling alright, Grace?”
Adrian squeezes my hand through my suit. I can't feel it very well, the suit is too bulky, but I can see the slight flex in their fingers. Wearing this suit – with its hard, faceted exterior, bulky oxygen tank and CO2 scrubbers – is kind of a pain. But it's the only way I can get out of my dome and into the city surrounding it. And besides, Rocky made it for me. He did his best to make it as comfortable as possible. The hands are a wonder of engineering, articulated enough to let me play my portable speech organ and as comfortable as insulated gloves, even though they're made from lots of hard, flat panels. There's even a food and water dispensing system – good ol’ liquid food, my favourite – so I don't get hungry or thirsty.
Even so, I can’t adjust my glasses, I can't scratch my face, and I can only just barely sit down. In order to get onto the Eridian mag-lev transit system – in a train car specifically adapted to my height and light requirements – I had to walk about a mile in it, and now it's all misted up with sweat. The cooling system will handle it, I'll be able to see properly again in a minute or two, but for now I can't see much of anything. On a moving train. With no way for me to predict when the track is going to bend in one direction or another, because it's a hundred percent pitch black outside. And even if my car had external lights, there are no windows anyway.
I cannot throw up in my suit. Please, please, please do not let me throw up in my suit.
“M’fine,” I grimace, and give Adrian a thumbs up. “Just a little motion sick. It'll pass.”
“Grace, your heart rate is increasing. We can stop the train if you need some respite.”
“I just need to take some deep breaths, I'll be okay.”
“Only if you're sure,” Adrian whistles skeptically.
I tell my stupid body the same thing as I told Adrian, and force myself to breathe deeply and evenly.
Ever since Rocky and I…became a thing, Adrian has been pulling out all the stops to try to get to know me better. And to help me get to know them. Most of our sort-of-dates have been pretty casual: movie nights, walks on the beach, picking me up after work so we can hang out. Sometimes with Rocky in tow, sometimes on our own. Being wooed by an alien is a strange experience, but a very welcome one. Rocky didn't really bother with all that, what with me almost dying in space and then almost dying when we got here.
We've been friends for almost two years, so it's not like I don't know Adrian pretty well already. But there's an electricity in the air now, the sensation of being pulled by a force stronger than mere gravity towards something exciting and wonderful. Adrian is cool. Way too cool for me, probably even too cool for Rocky. There’s no accounting for taste, though, because they are apparently very into both of us. We all know where this is heading. But for now, I'm enjoying the journey: the gifts and the physical affection and all the time we've spent talking and laughing together. Most of all, I'm enjoying the way Rocky practically vibrates with happiness when we're all in the same room together.
Today is a little different, though. It’s a whole-day affair, one of the biggest trips I've taken outside my dome since I arrived on Erid. The amount of care and planning Adrian had to have put into it all is staggering. So I cannot fall at the first hurdle by having to go home because my EVA suit is full of vomit. I shaved, I have my nicest clothes on, I'm wearing the bracelet of fancy-cut gems Adrian gave me and the glasses chain Rocky made for me, and I even drew a bowtie on the inside of the suit. As far as scrubbing up nicely goes, this is as good as Ryland Grace is ever going to get.
“We are arriving now. How are you feeling?”
They fuss over me, tapping different parts of the suit so they can get a better view. I clasp the back of one hand, holding it tight against me.
“I'm fine, Adri. No need to worry. I'm excited to see where you work.”
The chiming tones of the train announcer ring out as we pull to a stop, letting the other passengers know that there will be a slight delay as my car is unhooked. They use the convoluted, polyphonic name for me that the second contact crew came up with when they first met me: blah blah Star Wanderer, blah blah Earth’s Gift, Saviour of Erid, eugh. It's going to mean a lot of gawkers, that's for sure.
“Do not worry, I have arranged security. There will be nobody on the platform but us.”
Adrian takes my hand in theirs.
“Thank you,” I murmur. I close my eyes and try to breathe again.
“The entry hall will be a different matter, I'm afraid. But it is only a few hundred meters from the train station to the Oceanographic Institute.”
I can't really go anywhere incognito. There's no hiding the fact that I'm the only one of my species on this entire planet, and my personal lighting team has to set up floodlights in advance of my visit if I'm going somewhere other than the fifty meter walk to Rocky and Adrian’s home. By now, all anyone who wants to catch a glimpse of Erid’s favourite alien has to do is go where the floodlight crew are setting up, and just wait for me to arrive. It's usually a lot of people. I wish they all had something better to do. I can't hold it against them, though. I know that I’d be front and center behind the barriers wearing my “I want to believe” shirt if our roles were reversed.
I have to crouch to get out of the train car, even through the extra-height doors. Thankfully, the platform is as empty as Adrian promised. From inside the other carriages I can hear the sound of curious tapping: the other passengers are definitely trying to get a sneaky look at me. I can’t see them, though, which is the important thing. Some Eridians wearing safety gear appear from what I assume is the platform office and begin uncoupling my car. A couple of consummate little professionals, they don't so much as tap a claw in my direction. It's a quick process, just releasing some magnets, but the whole train still has to wait for me. I really hope I'm not causing a mass-tardiness event among the normal Eridians who are just trying to go about their day.
Adrian tugs my hand gently, leading me away from the safe, empty platform and towards the entry hall.
“Remember, you can dial up the noise-cancelling in your earpieces if it becomes too loud. Please do not suffer unnecessarily, dear one.”
That’s new; the little endearments both of them have started slipping into their speech. They've always been affectionate with each other, but I'm still reeling at being included. It makes me feel wonderfully light-headed.
“Also, you should eat or drink now if you need to. Or I'm happy if you want to do it in front of the crowd, that could be extremely funny.”
I laugh. I'm not quite as gung-ho as Adrian about riling up the crowds who come to gawk at me. Their attitude is basically if you show up to bother an alien you should be ready to see an alien. That – ironically – I shouldn't have to be easily digestible to the masses. I take a sip from my food and water pouches in the privacy of the tunnel. Rocky and Adrian seem to think there's nothing I can do that will turn the populace of Erid against me, but I'm not about to test that theory.
“Time to face the music,” I squeeze Adrian’s hand tightly.
“You should ignore the music entirely,” Adrian stamps their xenonite foot in irritation. It makes a loud, ringing tone Rocky built into it for effective punctuation purposes. “You didn't sign up for it, you don't deserve it, and if I had my way we would enjoy our outing in peace.”
“I wish.” I sigh. “It's fine, I get it. Who wouldn’t want to see a real alien if they had the chance?”
“I can't argue, I suppose. You are an endlessly fascinating creature.”
They say it with so much affection it makes my knees go a little wobbly. I try to think of something smooth to say in return, but my body decides now would be a good time for me to inhale some of my own saliva and have a thirty second coughing fit about it. When I can finally breathe again, I notice we're not alone. Standing in the mouth of the tunnel are two Eridians I recognize.
“Lighting’s all good to go, you should have a nice clear path to the Institute.” says the smaller of the two: a jasper-coloured Eridian who only reaches up to my knee.
That’s Sparky, my chief lighting tech. He offers me a thumbs up, and I return it happily. Sparky is one of Rocky’s oldest friends, a fellow engineer from their school days. Rigging up lighting for alien field trips is way below his pay-grade, but I get the sense he's just glad to have his friend home safe. He's one of the first Eridians besides Rocky and Adrian that I met socially when I came down from the Mary. I still feel kinda bad about his English name. I was getting pretty sick then, so my selections tended to be a bit uncreative.
“Enjoy your trip, Dr. Grace!” He adds, with a sly little tilt of his carapace. I've tripped over his wiring too many times to count, even with the big yellow warning strips the team made for me.
“Will do, Sparks. No unplanned extra ones, hopefully.”
The other Eridian is considerably less friendly. Their name, thanks to my scurvy-addled brain, is Boulder. They're the biggest Eridian I've ever seen – almost up to my shoulder – and appear to be made out of granite. Nobody is going to mess with Boulder. Which makes them the ideal choice to head up my security team. Adrian seems to have this weird, love-hate relationship with them where they're all buddy-buddy one minute and yelling at each other the next, but from what I can gather they do an excellent job of preventing the weirdos in the populace from getting too close to me. Or, rather, only letting in the particular weirdos I want close to me. Rocky and I try not to talk to them. My reason is that I'm terrified of them. Rocky just thinks they're a jerk.
“Are you sure that's wise?” Boulder says, pointing at mine and Adrian’s clasped hands.
He has a point. Rocky and Adrian’s reunion after 430 Eridian years apart was a huge media sensation. From what little I was told, they were a bigger headline than me or the taumoeba in some publications. They're the people’s sweethearts, and it’s starting to look like I’ve inserted myself into their marriage like a big, gross, wet homewrecker.
All of my various support teams have been brought mortifyingly up to speed on recent…events, so I'm safe around them. They're either fine with whatever Rocky, Adrian and I are, or they got fired. Or they quit. Rocky won't let me see any of the briefing memos, but based on the tone of my most recent medical exams, I can hazard a guess at exactly how much of my brand new sex life is now mandatory Grace-care-team knowledge. I really wish it wasn't all of it.
“That is for me and Grace to decide,” Adrian says, sternly.
Oh God, that means I'm going to have to make a choice here. I'm already wearing jewelry from both of my prospective partners. I know some of the former dome employees have been making a stink in the news feeds. Our secret is out whether I want it to be or not. What’s a little hand-holding on top of all that?
“I'm fine with it.” Ugh, that sounded way too non-committal. I can't do that to Adrian after they went to all this trouble. “I mean, I want to stay like this, if that's okay.”
“Of course.” Adrian trills, happily. “That is what I would prefer as well.”
“I won't stop you.” Boulder grumbles, “But for the record, this will make my job six times harder.”
“It's good that you are well compensated, then. Grace, shall we?”
That's my cue to stop being an anxious, passive lump and actually commit to something, for once.
“Yes. Please. Let's go.”
The noise from the entry hall hits me before we even reach the end of the tunnel. It’s not like a human crowd where everyone is shouting their own thing at the top of their lungs. This is more like a rising tide of harmonies that feels like I'm overdosing on some kind of auditory hallucinogen whenever I experience it. The first time, when I was fresh off the space elevator, I wasn't sure if I was going to lose my hearing or my sanity first. Hence the Rocky-engineered earpieces: with enough noise-cancelling that I get to keep my fragile brain and eardrums intact.
This crowd sounds excited, anticipatory, with a slight undercurrent of something else I don't recognize. It's not a thrum, not exactly, but it has a similar effect - the crowd are singing their thoughts and feelings as one entity. A pulsing, rippling song that spreads and melds and changes based on how the individuals within it react. It's intimidating as all heck.
“Do not worry, Boulder’s team is very good. They have extra staff today, just in case.”
I don't ask in case of what. Eridians are peaceful, almost to a fault, but they're also the apex predator of their entire planet. It's as if grizzly bears had been the ones to gain sapience on Earth. A single Eridian would struggle to get through my suit, but enough of them piling on me would crush me easily. Which would be the least of my concerns once the suit seals gave out. I'd be reduced to a thin layer of flash-cooked meat paste before anyone could even say “oops.”
It's not going to come to that. These are nice, civilized Eridians who just want a glimpse of their planetary saviour. And boy, are there a lot of them. The entry hall is packed. The security team have cordoned off a section in the middle for me and Adrian to walk to the exit, but the rest is a vibrating sea of differently coloured carapaces. It's a shame they can’t see how pretty they all look.
I smile my best ‘I am very comfortable being the center of attention and am totally not about to have a panic attack’ smile. Then I do what I always do when people have gathered specifically to see me: I wave. Normally that goes down a storm, people love seeing the alien do alien things! This time, though, their collective song shatters into a cacophony of discordant notes. I may not be from around here, but I know shock when I hear it.
Then I look at my raised arm and see the bracelet Adrian gave me, gems sparkling prettily in the floodlights. Oh. Oh no. I just waved my adulterer’s trophy at a crowd of aliens biologically programmed to be matrimonially faithful.
The noise hits me like a wall. I can feel it in my organs. In the time it takes me to fumble the earpiece controls on the side of my portable keyboard, my eardrums almost rupture from the resonance. Even with the noise-cancelling dialled all the way up it's uncomfortably loud.
I feel a push from behind: Boulder is hustling me and Adrian toward the exit as fast as they can push us. Which isn't that fast, actually, because Adrian is digging their heels in and screaming something at the top of their lungs. Then they kick Boulder hard in the carapace. Boulder throws up two hands in a weirdly human gesture that definitely means ‘it’s your funeral’ and backs off. And then we're just standing in the middle of a huge room full of absolutely furious Eridians.
Adrian begins slamming their xenonite leg on the floor like a judge’s gavel, and slowly, slowly, the crowd goes quiet.
“You should be ashamed of yourselves!” Adrian yells, voice echoing in the silence.
Oh crap. I'm going to die here, crushed under a bunch of angry rocks.
“How dare you judge the being who gave up everything to save your worthless carapaces! [Grace] left its home, its family, its people! It left them forever! You would deny it any love, any comfort in its new home? Who the [fuck] do you think you are?!”
Adrian used the fancy version of my name, the one with all the extra layers of meaning, and the formal Eridian pronoun they all use for each other. The “fuck” isn't exactly “fuck”, either, it's something about eating or digestion, but it's one of the worst swearwords they have so that's what I've translated it to. Just the sort of thing you should yell at an angry mob.
“Adrian, chill out! You're going to get us killed!”
“I would like to see them try,” Adrian hisses, drawing themselves up as high as their carapace will go and raising two arms threateningly. And yeah, that's scary, I’m definitely scared of that, but not as scared as I am of several hundred Eridians all sitting on me at once.
I grab frantically at my portable keyboard and try to think of something I can say with it that will calm everything down. It only has a narrow octave range and a single, secondary set of chord keys, so I can speak about as well as a hatchling with it. Whatever I come up with, I better make it good.
<Please>, I play, hesitantly. <Please stop. Erid is home. Erid is family. Grace love Erid. All of Erid. And Grace love new family most of all.>
I sound like I've had a traumatic brain injury, and honestly, I've probably had several. But it's enough to stop the building maelstrom of rage that Adrians’s words triggered. Most Eridians have never heard me speak before. I mean, they've heard me speak in English with Rocky translating, or they've heard me play pre-prepared, practiced statements on my much larger keyboard. Never words directly from me to them, in a faltering attempt at their own language.
I sound pitiful. Scared. Even though my words are a monotone to them, devoid of the additional pitch and tone modifiers of proper Eridian speech, I know they can hear my meaning because the heart of their song starts to shift immediately.
<You have been so kind to me. Your kindness keep me alive. Grace Adrian Rocky need your kindness now. Please. Thank you.>
It isn't one tenth of what I wish I could say, if I could truly speak like an Eridian. But it's enough, somehow. The sound recedes, collapsing into a confused hubbub that almost sounds like a restless human crowd. They’ve lost their consensus. And that's our cue to get the fudge out of here.
“Move, Adrian. We need to move.”
Adrian lets me pull them along as fast as my suit will allow. It's not all that fast, but we're out in the street where the crowd is thinner before I notice that Adrian is limping.
“Oh shit, are you in pain?”
“Yes. It doesn't matter. We must keep going, do not slow down.”
We hustle our butts down the street, ignoring the Eridians gathered on either side of my route, until we reach a large building covered in wave-like carvings. It’s been specially lit up, just for me, and if I wasn't shaking with adrenaline right now I’d call it beautiful.
This is the Institute. Adrian’s institute. Because they may have merely been a very important marine biologist when Rocky left Erid, but now they run the whole show. Adrian swipes some kind of stone embedded in one arm against a smooth spot on the wall, and the doors open wide to admit us both. We make it inside, to the empty cavern of the lobby, before my head goes fuzzy and I sit down, hard, on the polished floor.
“Grace? Breathe, Grace. Please, you have to breathe.”
Adrian's voice is low. Panicky. They haven't seen me like this for a long, long time. I haven't felt like this in a long time, either.
“Please, please, Grace!”
“Stop. Just stop.” I grit out. I wish Rocky was here. He knows how to handle this, knows how to handle me. Adrian is an amateur by comparison.
Adrian finally releases my hand. They back off, hands fiddling endlessly in the same stress-patterns I've seen Rocky make a million times. I do my breathing, my counting. I switch on the little fan Rocky installed to dry my face because he knew I'd end up crying in here eventually. I close my eyes and try to center myself in my claustrophobic suit inside an alien atmosphere.
“Adri, what the hell?” I ask, when my heart finally stops trying to break out of my ribcage. “This was meant to be a nice date. Why did I have to plead for my life on our nice date, Adrian?”
“I'm so, so sorry,” they wail, collapsing on the floor next to me with a ‘thunk.’ “I didn't expect them to be so judgemental! It's none of their fucking business!”
“They seem to feel – pretty strongly, I might add – that it is! That I’m standing in the way of your great, cosmic love story! Could we maybe address that, please?!”
The wordless sound that comes out of Adrian almost breaks my heart in half. They've been through so much, just like Rocky and I have. They mourned and hoped and suffered for seventy Earth years, and the mate who finally came home from space was an achingly familiar stranger who was hopelessly enmeshed with an alien. None of this is fair to them either.
“Grace, please, you have to understand.” They croon, sadly. “This is not just a ‘nice date.’ It is very important to me. I could not proceed any further with my pursuit of you as my mate without bringing you here first. And I didn't anticipate the general public feeling so strongly about what three consenting adults do with their personal lives.”
It was naivete, then. Or misplaced hope. Or just more optimism than I can usually muster. Can't really fault them for being hopeful, it's a trait I've always admired.
“We're the three most famous people on the entire planet, Adri.”
“Yes. I’m not sure I will ever get used to it.”
“And the PR team is going to kill both of us.”
“I fear they will have to fight Rocky for the privilege of killing me.”
I take Adrian’s closest hand and then press a gentle kiss to the back of it.
“I can put in a good word for you, if you like. Maybe get a stay of execution.”
I’m still kind of upset. But this is the first time anyone’s used the ‘m’ word about me. Rocky will sometimes say things so unexpectedly romantic it makes me blush right down to my toes, but aside from calling me ‘my Grace’ he hasn't put an official label on things. Which is fine, we know what we are. He's mine, I'm his. We couldn't be apart from each other if we tried.
“So, you want me to be your mate?” I ask, my stomach full of delicious butterflies.
“Of course, what else would all of this be for?”
“I dunno,” I grin. “Maybe you just wanted to have some sexy fun with an alien.”
Adrian lets out a tinkling little burst of laughter.
“I’ve heard you are very good with your hands. But I have designs on all of you, Grace. If you'll have me.”
“We’ll see.” I push myself awkwardly up off the floor. “Let's have our big important date first.”
“Of course,” Adrian hums happily, “please come, I have so much to show you.”
“Wait, what about your leg?”
Adrian is still limping, keeping their weight off the xenonite prosthesis. The limb was severed cleanly at the knee long before Rocky left Erid, but I don't know the full story and I haven't asked.
“It will be fine. I just need to rest it. The nerve stimulus from earlier was…entirely too much.”
“Okay, well, let me know if you need to sit down or anything.”
“I still have plenty of legs, Grace.” They say, amused. “I can simply not use that one. Thank you for your concern, but I really will be fine.”
Adrian pats my hand affectionately.
“Please, let me show you why I brought you here.”