Chapter Text
Waking up in space with no memory of who he was had been hard. Waking up and not immediately clocking something was wrong with his other half could be forgiven right? Ryland couldn’t remember his own name at first. Panic, fear, and pain are powerful motivators for pushing things off till the crisis was over. That didn’t mean he hadn’t felt the creeping sense of wrongness under his skin. Not wrong with Polaris exactly – but that he was looking at her in the wrong shape.
Daemons were manifestations of someone soul made material. Inexpiable and wonderful. Ryland could hardly hold back tears long enough to give Yao and Ilyukjina a proper send off. Or as proper as they could manage in space. Polaris couldn’t hold back weeping, high pitched cries leaving her black muzzle. They could both see the gold dust lingering on both bodies from their daemons. Ryland could only hope they had been asleep too.
Then it seemed like he’d never had a moment to stop and think about the feeling under his skin. Her touch was still comforting. Rough fur under his hands still brought a sense of peace. Between meeting Rocky, finding the predator on Adrian, nearly dying, Rocky nearly dying and then realizing he would be going home and just as quickly realizing he had to go back. Not like it was much of a choice to save his best friend.
It was only on the way to Erid was Ryland able to take time to question the wrongness he’d been feeling. Deep in the personal logs he’d found his answer. Polaris hadn’t been a fox before he’d been force on the mission. She’d been a mink – soft, small and white. It made sense with her name. Polaris was the brightest star, the North Star and it’s light from Earth was bright and clear. Perfect for a white mink. Not that it didn’t suit her personality, it did, but he’d never been creative with names.
Ryland had had to sit with her in his lap when he remembered. Remembered the pain of her being changed. A settled daemon rarely changed shape. Only in extreme circumstances did it happen. He’d held her close to his chest and buried his face in her fur as the phantom pain of the shift – the force of her growing and of claws and teeth pinning her down. Even as he’d gone under he’d felt the wrongness of other hands touching her to move them both.
A taboo. To touch or grab another's daemon unless you were incredibly close. And they’d both been handled so much, too much for the wrongness to fade once it was remembered.
There would be other days when the two of them couldn’t handled not touching as they worked. Rocky never complained, even though he must have thought it strange. Eridians didn’t have daemons.
Once they’d made it to Erid and his little habitat had been built he’d felt better about letter Polaris away from him. Thankfully the xenonite suits never made him feel like the Eridians were touching her. Even if he’d love to properly touch Rocky and get proper hugs but he never wanted to feel another’s unwanted touch on his soul.
---
Eden’s view of daemons was heavily connected to the trees. Simon had always heard the Father speak of them like seeds from a forest long ago. Given to humans to let them connect with nature before the stars disappeared. But the stars had left and the fear was that their daemons would go with them.
The space station he’d lived on had never had space. Ironic. Simon had seen the Father force those close to settling age to keep their daemons small. Rodents and birds, some dogs here and there but nothing very large. Caging those who seemed unable settle small til the daemon was its final shape. Simon had been lucky – in a sense – Maple hadn’t settled at the right age. She’d settled early. After his mothers death and the ceremony to feed her to the tree.
And Maple had settled too big. Snapping jaws and spotted fur of a hyena. But she was too big, took up too much space. Space was a resource and just another they couldn’t spare on a dying station with a dying tree.
The COI wasn’t any better. Isolation. Though even they weren’t cruel enough to separate two halves of a whole. Yet Simon had seen the horrors they could inflict on prisoners. Gold dust from daemons hurt to force compliance. But even the COI didn’t have large daemons.
The submarine was cramped with the two of them. Hot and damp. Yet it never could compare to the voices – the eel screaming out with the voices of human and daemon or the uncaring god it spoke of. She screamed out his name, out Maple’s name when no one had ever spoken it.
The blood was thick and their combined fear pooled just as quickly as the red flooded over them. He had wanted to reach for her, feel her fur one last time before they both rejoined the tree. The ripping and cracking of bone as he called for her and her rough voice so filled with pain and fear.
They should have died.
Should have but didn’t. The seedling and blood combined with them. Changed them even as they both fell to the darkness and smothering copper.
--
Waking up is slow- muddled and confusing. A nameless, careless god who looks through a pinhole didn’t seem the type to allow them peace. The Father never spoke of concrete things after death other then feeding the Tree. But he must be alive.
Maple’s head was a familiar weight on his chest. Her breathing tickled his chin, but nothing about consciousness made sense. Pain was a familiar ghost in Simon’s life and the full body ache matched the beating he’d taken in the sub. But the smell and feel of something over his mouth and nose wasn’t. Great effort went into prying his eyes open.
The world was blurry. Light dull. Not the same as the sub and not anything close to the harsh whites of the COI’s facilities. Simon’s body felt to heavy to really move and the pain zipped and zinged through him at the slightest shift.
Broken ribs. A few bad fights here and there when Eden asked them to raid other stations made the pain familiar.
“Oh!” A feminine voice above his head spoke. “You’re awake! Stay still so you don’t pull any stitches. I’ll call Ryland.”
That wasn’t a voice he was familiar with. No one he’d interacted with with either Eden of the COI were named Ryland. The need to move. To defend himself. To get away settled under his skin, but he could hardly breath when he moved to sit up.
Or try to sit up. The pain and memories of his arm being torn away came back. It felt so detached for the moment.
Gentle warmth flooded his soul bond. Maple. She was with him and if nothing else could defend them long enough for him to get up.
“We’re not back with the COI. I don’t know where we are.” Her rasping voice kept soothing his frayed nerves.
Footsteps killed that feeling.
Yet the face that appeared above him was someone he’d never seen before. Messy hair and glasses and clothes so unlike anything any station had. Strangest of all was the golden eyed fox settling around his shoulders. It was such a childish way for any daemon to act – maybe they had been found by some unknown group.
“Oh gosh. It’s good to see you awake.” The man smiled, “Worried we’d be waiting a few more days before you even stirred. Not that would be unexpected! You’re in rough shape.”
Simon watched the little fox tug at blond hair.
“What Ryland means is, ‘hello, do you need anything?”
That feminine voice was the daemon? She spoke to people rather then other daemons only? The confusion must have shown somewhere on his face.
“Ah, I suppose it’s not uncommon for cultures to keep to older traditions.”
“’Ris.” the man – Ryland – moved closer and suddenly Simon was moved to sit up slightly. “Sorry. We must be overwhelming. Sit tight and I’ll grab you something to drink.”
Simon felt Maple shift against the new position and a soft whimper left her. Slowly he moved to stroke her cheek. A pittance of comfort he could give. Her big head leaned into his hand and for a moment the two settled into a little bubble of peace. Frankly this felt like an impossible dream – or eel manifested hallucination. Yet, it was so much kinder then the screaming accusation they’d felt on the submarine.
Soon the very strange duo returned with a cup. The man moved slowly to take the clear mask off his face before handing over the mug.
“Here. Go slow, puking with your ribs hurt would not feel great.”
Complying Simon sipped the water. The feeling of cool clean water seemed to touch every part of him.
“Could you tell us you guys names?” Ryland had settled on the edge of the bed, careful to keep from touching Maple. A gesture no one at the COI’s prison had been given. Discomfort from touching another’s soul was just a fraction of punishment convicts deserved.
Simon could feel Maple testing the waters as she spoke. “Maple and Simon.”
Daemons were always meant to be other-ed from their human counterpart. The Father had spoken in big booming tones about their connection to the tree and sacred nature while just as quickly catching those to force a small settling. Humans should never talk to Daemons once settled. Daemons were guides and nothing more.
Bullshit to Simon, but a rule of Eden they had to follow under watching eyes. Yet the pair before them didn’t care. The little fox sat in the mans lap, content and happy in a way so few daemons ever were.
“Well, I’m Ryland. Though just about everyone here tends to call me by my last name Grace.” He gently rubbed a finger under the fox’s chin. “This is Polaris.”
Polaris seemed to straighten up, happily soaking up the others affection.
“Do you need anything fixed right away? If you’re up to it we’d like it if we could ask a few questions.”
It felt like a trick. No one every asked. Eden demanded. The Coalition demanded. Even the fucking eel demanded things of him. Screaming out hate, calling for him to let everything die with the black box unrecoverable. For whatever god that looked upon them he prayed someone had gotten that black box. Because he clearly wasn’t in the Coalition’s hands anymore. Maybe Simon could give them just a little more peace before the shit hit the fan.
“Everything fucking hurts,” Simon’s voice worse then Maple’s.
The man winced in sympathy. “Totally understandable. You’ve got at least two broken ribs and more cuts and scratches then I could count. Not to mention…”
He waved to his arm. “I tried binding your ribs as best I could. We have some stuff for pain but we didn’t know if you’d respond badly to anything stronger then Tylenol. Polaris could you grab some of the stronger stuff?”
The fox nodded and elegantly hopped to the floor and was somewhere rummaging around the room. Whatever she was looking for didn’t take long to find. Soon she was back and dropping two small bottles. The blond read over the label quickly.
“Okay, this one is for people. Won’t work immediately, but better then nothing.” He carefully took the cup and set two pills in his hand for Simon to take. Quick to give the water back. “We also have some that is supposed to work with daemons, but the type we have is for pretty small ones. It’ll dull things a little.”
Again a shuffle started and a small pill was given to him for Maple. She carefully took it and lapped the last of the water.
Nothing made any sense. Medication for daemons was unheard of. A weakness of the soul was just that – a weakness. No sympathy for weakness. It felt all too fucking much.
The fucking blood ocean and the lies from everyone. A false hope of freedom. Trying to get away from the mess of the world. It felt like he was still stuck in the damn submarine chocking on blood and shouting at the world as that fucking eel tried to crush him. Everything was too much.
This couldn’t be real. This kindness was unheard of – a gentleness never meant to him. The heat that built up behind him eyes was just too much. Hot tears spilled down his cheeks as all the emotions overwhelmed him.
Maple pressed against his chest. Her heavy body felt like heaven even with the pain it brought out.
“Whoa! Hey- hey it’s alright.” Simon couldn’t see the man but felt his hand on his uninjured shoulder. “What happened? Is the pain worse then you were saying?”
“Stop. Just. Fucking. Stop.” Simon growled. “You can not be fucking real. None of this makes sense!”
Maples growled loud. Louder then she had ever dared to before. He could feel the vibrations as she reacted to their jumbled feelings. The hand on him left quickly. Simon curled around tight around Maple. The only thing that had always felt real.
Maybe it was moments later, maybe it was hours but exhaustion finally pulled them both under.
--
Grace supposed he couldn’t blame the guy from being emotional. Still didn’t stop the fucking terror of a hyena growling at him. Even if he new it was a daemon, the hard coded part of him knew to fear a large predator with big flipping teeth.
Polaris was nearly at full size bigger with how fluffed out her fur was as she sat in his arms. Thank god schools required training to keep teachers daemons from reacting to agitated students and their own daemons. Frankly you could never know what a kid who was upset or overwhelmed could do – not to mention ones who felt threatened.
“That could have gone better.”
A gentle swat to his face. “Of course it could. Can you really blame them?”
No – Ryland couldn’t blame them. Not a single thing about them made sense! A metal submarine coming from near Three World. That was not the correct direction for it to be an Earth. And when the crew who found it cut it open in the ‘human zone’ because they detected human zones it dumped a terrifying amount of blood out before the two were found inside somehow alive.
“Friend Grace?” The calm tones of Ember caught his attention. She was a dark red Eridian with bright yellow claws and an accomplished part of the space builder crew.
“Sorry, I think whatever he’s been through caught up to him. Uhhh – I’m going to let him rest then I’ll try and figure out more and explain where we are. I don’t want to freak him out more.”
She tapped her claws together. “Understood! Vitals we can see are calming down. But the noise coming made us more worried about Friend Grace and Polaris.”
“We’re alright. Shaken up a little but,” he shrugged, “It’s understandable.”
“Yes, yes, yes. Are you planning on staying here again?”
“Yeah.” Grace paused for a moment. “Are Rocky or Adrian back yet?”
“Ah, no,” She shook her carapace back and forth, “Both are meant to be back in a day or two. Will make sure to alert them to what has happened. Friend Grace worried about new human?”
Polaris nodded her head. “Yes, they’re going to be very out of it. I doubt he’ll be moving anywhere but Maple, his daemon might need to to stretch her legs once her paws are healed.”
Ember’s quiet humming filled the space. All of them knew it’d be complicated, everything was too strange not to be. But at least they could plan for some kind of recovery for them.