Chapter Text
There were no pills in space, no carefully prescribed medicines, no therapists to do what the meds couldn't. Space was cold and awful and so annoyingly gorgeous.
A hit to Blue knocked Lance out of his little self reflective trance. He knew he was in the middle of a battle; he knew his team needed him, but he couldn't focus. Everything was blurry, and the world seemed to move so fast while he moved so slow. It felt like cotton was in his veins instead of blood, weighing him down and making him panic.
He had to get his shit together.
Another hit to Blue rocked him around in his seat, shaking him out of his foggy mindset just enough to blast the Galra ship that hit him. He rubbed a hand over the arm of his pilot seat, hoping Blue could tell how sorry he was.
How much he hated himself for letting her get hurt.
no...not your fault...
Lance thought he heard a female voice in his head, but hearing voices wasn't all that new to him, and the incoming comm from Keith took up what remaining focus he had.
"Lance, you asshat...attention. Pidge....use some backup...you ignored her the last time..." And apparently, the amount of focus he had left wasn't worth shit. Lance couldn't tell if the comm screen was actually on the fritz or if he couldn't focus on Keith because of all the cotton. It could be both.
let me help you...my paladin.
Ok, yeah, he wasn't just hearing voices again; that was Blue.
"Blue? Baby-girl, you can talk?"
yes, though...not well.
"Hey, you're doing better than me most days." Yet another hit knocked him around, but this time he saw Red zipping around in front of him. He could almost feel Keith's primal gorilla rage. "Blue, you said you could help? I don't care what it is, do it."
Yes, my paladin.
And then everything went black, like the end of a vintage movie. Lance was half expecting to see a cartoon pig appear from the tiny little bit of vision he had left and stutter away a happy parting message. But that didn't happen. He just entirely blacked out.
Lance wasn't in the med bay lying down on a cot like he expected to be when he came to. Instead, he was standing in front of Shio, apparently getting yelled at; Pidge, head covered in bandages, sat on a cot to his left, fussed over by Coran and Hunk. Keith was angrily glaring at him from behind Shiro like the feral little chihuahua he was.
"Lance, you need to work on your focus. We need you to be a part of the team." He knew Shiro was the one reprimanding him. Still, the rising panic of his missing memory and the fact that Shiro was yellin g and not just passive-aggressively scolding him, made Shiro not look like Shiro.
"Lance. Lance, are you even listening to me?" He was trying to, but whenever he attempted to, all he could see was his uncle, towering above him with a sneer disappointment and anger festering in his eyes.
"If you're not even going to pay attention to us while we're trying to help you, maybe you shouldn't be a paladin!" That hurt, enough to shock him out of his Shiro-Not Shiro internal debate. Hunk looked at Pidge like she'd just poured hot ice cream all over his lap, and Coran refused to look away from his datapad. "I got a concussion because you're too much of a bumbling, no-good, untalented idiot to help your friend out! You fucking asshole!"
"Pidge enough!" He could feel tears hot behind his eyes, but he couldn't cry in front of his uncle. No, wait, his uncle was on earth, and Lance was in space. The only good thing about being who knows how many miles away from his home and family.
Fuck, he didn't even know how far away he was from his own damn home.
Shiro, it was Shiro, not his uncle, turned his disappointed gaze back onto Lance. Shiro barely opened his mouth before Lance decided to bolt. He couldn't handle this. Lance knew he was a fuck up, barely even a cargo pilot, but it still stung to hear. Especially coming from the mouth of someone he considered family.
Running into his room and locking the door, Lance collapsed onto his bed, head in his hands trembling.
My paladin.
"Blue? Blue, the hell was that?! What happened? Why don't I remember anything after we talked during the battle?!"
I entered your mind and took over your consciousness. I apologize for not explaining further at the time, but you seemed so panicked, and I was desperate to help you.
"I, yeah, I was. Thanks then, I think. Is it, was that, like, a one-time thing?"
No, my paladin, my cub, if you would allow me to, I could take over any time you wished or needed.
"That sounds like a good plan. Thanks, Blue."