Work Text:
Back to Black
Kate walked into the Tower with a spring in her step and gave a casual wave to the guard behind the desk.
Like all the other employees in the building, he recognized her, and he gave her a reasonably friendly nod as she passed by on her way to the private elevator, though the expression on his face remained professionally neutral.
The story of how she’d once hacked the building’s system by compromising a previous security guard’s phone had become part of the new hire training for any guards that Valentina added to the team. So it was no wonder that the current members of the security team tended to keep their distance.
She scanned her key card, a possession that was extremely precious to her, and then tucked it back into her pocket as the elevator doors closed behind her.
The key card had been a recent gift from Yelena, a physical manifestation of the trust between them, and a sign that Yelena really did want her around.
Kate knew that she shouldn’t doubt the depth of Yelena’s care for her, but even with the massive amounts of evidence that had piled up in support of that fact, she still found it hard to believe sometimes.
But the softness in the blonde’s eyes when she looked at Kate, and the very specific smile that the archer knew were just for her were generally enough to wash away her insecurities.
Their relationship had really begun to blur the lines between platonic and romantic lately, and though they hadn’t kissed, the anticipation of finally, finally moving past the line of friendship was starting to make it hard for Kate to breathe whenever she was in Yelena’s presence.
While she had been enjoying the slow burn, and was content to take things at Yelena’s pace, the archer had decided that today was the day that she would confess her feelings and let the chips fall where they may.
It was the one year anniversary of the Void nearly swallowing the city, the day that Kate had seen Yelena on television after the woman had disappeared from her life without a trace, and something about the timing felt right.
Yelena and the rest of the team were off on a mission, but they were due back soon, and Kate had been too anxious to just stay at home, so she decided to be there waiting when Yelena got back.
A bout of nerves made her stomach swoop, so she took a deep breath as the elevator doors opened.
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Bob was not having a very good day.
He was alone in the Tower, and while that was not such an unusual occurrence, today the silence felt oppressive instead of relaxing.
The others were off on a mission, and while he knew that he would probably just get in the way if he joined them, it was hard knowing that the rest of them were useful and he wasn’t.
In his most recent therapy sessions, he’d been digging into some painful childhood trauma, and he understood that it was a necessary part of the process, but it left him feeling like a layer of his skin had been peeled off leaving him vulnerable and unprotected, like a snail without a shell.
And now it was the anniversary of one of the worst days of his life, the anniversary of him hurting people, and scaring people, and ruining people’s lives.
As he looked out over the city, he felt sick to his stomach and his head started to pound. He started in on his breathing exercises, but it wasn’t enough to keep the malevolent whispers in his mind at bay.
Of course they left you here all alone. You’re useless. Dangerous. You could never be a hero. You’re too weak. All you’ve ever done is hurt people. They’re right to abandon you.
He pressed his hands against his temples like he could squeeze the intrusive thoughts away. And then, from behind him, he heard the elevator doors opening and turned, hoping that whoever had just arrived would be able to help him.
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When she stepped out of the elevator, the first thing that Kate saw was Bob over near the windows.
He had his hands up and braced against the side of his head, and from his posture and the look in his eyes when he turned to face her, she immediately knew that something was very wrong.
“Bob?”
As she approached, he took a few hesitant steps towards her before stopping and swaying in place a little.
“Are you okay dude? You don’t look so great.”
He really, really didn’t. His face was pale and clammy, and he tried to smile at her, but the expression looked like it hurt his face.
Her question did not get a verbal response, but it had been kind of rhetorical anyway since he clearly was not okay.
Mind racing, Kate tried to figure out what was happening.
Was he sick, or drugged? Had someone done something to him?
She paused and took a careful look around the room, trying to determine if anything was out of place, or if there was any indication of an intruder.
“Is anyone else here?” she quietly asked.
His reply came through clenched teeth.
“No, no they all…they all left. It’s just me.”
“Okay, that’s okay. I’m here, and I’m going to help you.”
She reached into her jacket and pulled out her phone, then realized that her first instinct was to call Yelena. But even though the blonde was likely already on the way back, she wouldn't be here in time to help with this immediate situation, whatever it was.
Talking mostly to herself, Kate said, “Is there a front desk number, or like, should I call for an ambulance? Could they even get in here? Would they think it’s a prank call? I bet they’d…”.
Her nervous rambling was cut off by Bob, who let out a pained sounding groan.
Kate’s head snapped up to see Bob standing rigidly, his hands clenched into tight fists, and when he looked up at her, his eyes had gone dark, the irises transformed into liquid black pools.
She staggered back a step instinctively as he started to shiver, but then he looked at her again, and his eyes were normal except for all the fear and sadness they held.
“Run. Kate, you have to run. Please.”
Then he collapsed, and she stared, frozen, as she tried to process what was happening and what she should do.
That's when she noticed the shadow.
It didn’t make sense for it to be there given the lighting in the room, and something seemed off about the shape. As she watched, it rippled almost imperceptibly outward like a puddle of black paint where the carpet should be and a shiver of fear ran up her spine.
Bob struggled up from his crumpled position and made it to his hands and knees, muscles locked so tight that he was trembling.
“Bob, what’s happening?”
She hadn’t run, but her voice was higher-pitched than usual and tinged with fear.
His head raised and he looked up at her, tears in his eyes.
“Kate…please…I can’t….”.
Then, he started to stand up, or that’s what she thought for a moment before realizing that the motion was all wrong. His hands were slack at his sides and he started to levitate, the shadow rippling under him as he rose several feet off the floor and hung there.
She did backpedal now, staggering away from this horror movie scene come to life.
The shadow was spreading now, but slowly, and Bob groaned, hands clenching an unclenching as an occasional violent twitch made his neck snap back and forth in a way that looked highly uncomfortable.
Bob was mumbling now, and she couldn’t hear most of what he was saying beyond the word “No” repeated several times.
Kate still didn’t run, though she continued to take cautious steps backwards as the shadow continued to creep outwards.
She had heard enough stories about the Void from various members of the Thunderbolts by now to know what was happening, and beyond her immediate worry for Bob, she was thinking about all the people working in the building, and everyone on the streets outside.
She thought about the photos she’d seen of the aftermath, the crashed cars and damaged structures. The injured people with a haunted look in their eyes.
Yelena had given her some details about what it was like on the inside, though she had not admitted to Kate that she was the first one to go in voluntarily. That was information that Kate had only heard due to Alexei’s bragging during dinner one night.
“My daughter, she steps inside the dark, because she is brave. A hero!”
Kate had immediately looked over to Yelena, and the expression on the blonde woman’s face was not proud, or satisfied. She just looked distant, and a little sad.
Later that night, in Yelena’s room, Kate had asked her about it.
“I was not doing it out of bravery. I thought…if I did not come out of there, it would be okay.”
Then her lips pressed together tightly and she remained silent, but Kate didn’t try to get more information. Instead, she’d pulled Yelena into her arms and held her tightly. They fell back onto the bed and she kept holding on, never loosening her grip, even as Yelena burrowed against her shoulder.
They had just laid there quietly and breathed together for a long time.
And now she was the one standing there and facing down the spreading darkness, watching as Bob thrashed, looking and sounding like he was in pain.
Only a moment of hesitation and then she was stepping forward. The last thing that she thought of before the darkness enveloped her was Yelena’s face.
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For a second, there was nothing, an absence of all sound and sensation.
Her eyelids fluttered for a moment and then the light came back and she was standing looking up at a chandelier that was so familiar, and yet…
An explosion outside made the building shake and all at once she knew where she was, even before a much smaller version of herself came running by, frantically searching for her parents.
A moment of vertigo and then she started after the little girl, almost catching up to her before she stopped dead and shook her own head like she was shaking off the fog from a dream.
“Hold up Bishop,” she said aloud, and the sound of her own voice was grounding.
She couldn’t get distracted, she needed to find Bob.
Though the stories that she’d heard from the different members of the Thunderbolts hadn’t fully aligned, they had all agreed on one thing: Finding Bob was the key to getting out.
Even knowing that, her feet remained frozen in place as she resisted the urge to stay in this memory and try to catch one last glimpse of her father. Maybe that wasn’t even possible since her younger self hadn’t managed it, but for a moment, the temptation was almost irresistible.
One sharp inhale and then she was balling her hands into fists and marching back to the door of her childhood bedroom, wrenching it open and stumbling forward…onto grass.
A graveside and a mother and daughter clinging to each other.
Her next breath turned into a sob that she choked down as her eyes were drawn to the headstone and her father’s name etched there. She forced her feet to move, allowing only the briefest glance at her mother’s face before spinning away, searching for the way out.
Kate forced her way through several more memories, injuries and disappointments, the flashing sirens and glint of handcuffs around her mother’s wrists as she was led away.
She sprinted through a dark passageway full of unnerving shadows and burst through a heavy wooden door to find Bob, cross-legged on the floor of a seemingly normal looking room.
He looked up as she entered, distress on his face.
“I don’t want to be here. I didn’t want to come back.”
She walked over cautiously, scanning for danger, but nothing jumped out at her. From somewhere below them, she could hear heavy footsteps pacing.
Bob’s shoulders tensed and she looked down at him, keeping her voice as gentle as possible.
“I know. But you got out last time, and we can get out again.”
Kate reached out her hand, palm up, an offering.
He looked at her nervously, his eyes momentarily drifting back down to the floor as a man’s angry voice echoed up to them.
“Bob.”
His eyes raised back to her face and she stretched her hand out a little farther.
He reached out and took it, somewhat surprised by the strength of her grip as she helped him rise to his feet. Maybe he shouldn’t have been. She had been training with Yelena for months now after all.
The thought of Yelena helped clear his head, and he looked around the room as he remembered the last time he’d been here. The moment when she’d appeared. But even she hadn’t been enough to save him.
“Last time they were all here though, and now it’s just us.”
Kate nodded in acknowledgement, but there was no despair in her expression.
“You’re stronger now than you were. And come on, I’m the world’s greatest archer, not exactly a bad person to have on your side.”
He finally smiled.
“I wish you weren’t here, but I’m glad you are.”
The volume of the sounds below them increased and there was a thump, a crash, a scream.
Bob’s jaw tightened and he started for the door.
“Let’s go.”
Together, they made it through a succession of Bob’s memories, full of chaos and pain. He flinched away from some, but Kate stayed right beside him, never wavering, and maybe she’d been right about him being stronger because it all felt more distant and less sharp than it had a year ago.
As they pushed through another doorway, he tried to remember the sequence from last time, and how they’d ended up back at the lab where his shadow self had been waiting.
“I think we’re almost there,” he told Kate, and she looked relieved.
But then they stepped onto white tile and into cool silence. He had just a moment to absorb what he was seeing before he turned back towards Kate and saw her stop dead, eyes fixed on the blonde figure slumped on the bathroom floor.
“What is this?”
Her tone was pained, and her hands were curling into fists, even though there was nothing here that she could fight.
He wanted to do something to comfort her, but he couldn’t even explain how they were here. When he spoke, he tried to sound calm for Kate’s sake.
“I don’t know…this hasn’t happened before. I’ve only been able to see people’s memories if I was touching them, or when they were in the void with me.”
It was clear that she’d heard him, but her focus was entirely on the woman on the floor. Her gaze was unwavering, her eyes never leaving Yelena’s slumped form.
“This is one of her memories? This happened?” she finally asked, her voice coming out in a choked near-whisper.
Though Bob’s first instinct was to protect Yelena’s privacy, he realized that since they were standing in this memory, that was a useless instinct.
“Yes. This memory is from before everything with the Thunderbolts. She was still working for Valentina and she wasn’t…happy.”
That was clearly an understatement, and he watched as Kate’s eyes roved the room taking in the empty vodka bottles discarded around the room.
After a moment, she hesitantly walked closer, crouching down in front of Yelena, close enough that she could reach out and touch her.
Yelena’s head swiveled up in an uncharacteristically ungraceful motion and her eyes blinked open.
The emptiness in her expression made Kate suck in a sudden breath.
“I didn’t realize…she won’t tell me about what it was like for her after we met. I thought she was out living some glamorous spy life, but the whole time…”.
Tears were freely running down Kate’s face now, and her voice trailed off like she no longer had the energy to speak.
Now Bob moved, coming over to gently help her to her feet.
“This is a memory, it’s the past. This isn’t her reality now. She’s happy. You make her happy.”
That was enough to make Kate finally pull her eyes away from the sad memory.
“You think so?” she asked, brushing away her tears with the back of her hand.
“I know so.”
He sounded so certain when he said it that Kate couldn’t help but smile, and as he smiled back, the room around them started to fade, and when their surroundings came back into focus they were in a large space that Kate didn’t recognize.
But apparently Bob did, because his smile quickly dropped away and his expression went wary.
Before she could ask what was wrong, someone spoke from the other side of the room.
“Back again? I’m not surprised. You never were smart enough to learn a lesson.”
Kate spun, planting her feet in a defensive stance as she searched for the origin of that mocking voice.
It took only a second for her to locate the person shaped black hole standing there, seemingly regarding them.
When Bob took a step towards that eerie specter, Kate quickly grabbed his arm, holding on tight.
“I have to face him," Bob protested, but he didn't try to escape her grip.
“Because that turned out so well last time?” the shadow asked, a voice that was like Bob’s, but with a disturbing echo that made Kate’s skin crawl.
“You can’t stop me,” it continued, “you never could.”
“I’m different now,” Bob said, only the slightest shake in his voice.
The response to his statement was a cold taunt.
“Shall we test that theory?”
Again, Bob tried to move closer, but Kate had not released his arm.
“Kate…this isn’t your fight. I have to do this.”
Her eyes darted over to the shadow, who remained in the same spot, head cocked to the side now as if interested by this interaction.
“But you don’t have to do this, remember? Fighting that thing isn’t the way to get out of here, right? That’s not how it worked last time.”
Bob looked uncertain now.
“Maybe this time I can win, and he’d be gone forever, and no one would ever have to come back here again.”
“But I am you Robert,” the voice of the void crooned, “this is your true face. And I've always been stronger. You can never defeat me.”
There were more words coming, but Kate used her grasp on Bob’s arm to maneuver him so his back was turned towards his tormentor and he was facing her instead.
“Bob…don’t listen. That isn’t you. I know you, okay? I know you.”
She gave his arm a little shake for emphasis, but it wasn’t really necessary because he was fully focused on her now, the fear in his eyes disappearing as he looked at her.
His eyes slid shut for a moment and when they opened again he looked determined.
“I know you too Kate Bishop. And you shouldn’t be in here.”
Then he stepped forward and wrapped her in his arms, hugging her tightly in a protective hold.
“You shouldn’t be in here,” he repeated, sounding solid and sure, “you should be out there, with Yelena.”
There was an angry shout, but it sounded far away now, and Kate clung to Bob and closed her eyes as everything went dark again.
When Kate’s eyes opened again, she was back in the Tower, lying on the floor with Bob beside her, the two of them still entangled. Their eyes met, and Bob smiled at her and then the sound of all the other people in the room suddenly flooded in. There was a lot of yelling and movement, and it was all a bit overwhelming, so Kate decided to just lay there for a minute.
She watched as Walker crouched down to help Bob up, and Bucky started to carefully check him for injuries, talking to him in a low voice.
And then there was a hand on Kate’s shoulder and she was instinctively rolling over as she recognized the touch and the voice even before she had a chance to consciously process who it was.
Still on the floor, she looked up at Yelena, who was crouched down beside her, waving off Alexei and Ava as her eyes frantically searched Kate’s face.
Yelena was saying her name, and saying other things, but mostly her name, and the care and worry in her tone made Kate's body fill with warmth.
And then she was being carefully pulled into a sitting position and Yelena’s hands were framing her face, calloused fingers rough, but her touch so gentle that it made Kate’s eyes start to well with tears.
This reaction clearly alarmed Yelena who started checking her for a head injury.
Her beautiful hazel eyes were wide and she looked terrified.
Kate cleared her throat and finally spoke.
“Hey, hey I’m fine. It’s okay.”
While Yelena was clearly relieved to hear her speak, now she looked both anxious and disbelieving.
“It is certainly not okay Kate Bishop. What happened? What were you thinking?”
Now that she was reacclimating to the real world again, and had survived a trip to the Void, some of Kate’s natural over confidence was returning.
She smiled.
“Bob and I just took a quick little trip, and now we’re back. It's all good.”
Yelena was muttering in Russian, and then she switched back to English to make one very matter of fact statement.
“You are so stupid.”
Kate immediately scoffed and then added, talking fast, “Bob wasn’t okay when I got here, so I was helping, and it all turned out…”.
The rest of her explanation was cut off when Yelena kissed her.
It took a moment for this to register, but once it did and her brain’s constant chatter went dead silent, she kissed Yelena back with enthusiasm, her heart tripping over itself as warmth flooded her entire body.
They kissed for a long time, much longer than was likely appropriate for the setting and the moment, but neither of them cared even a little.
When they finally separated, Yelena leaned in to press their foreheads together and let out a deeply satisfied sigh.
Kate relaxed into Yelena’s embrace and managed only one breathless word.
“Wow.”
“So stupid.”
They started kissing again, but this time were almost immediately interrupted by a whole chorus of heckling (from Walker and Ava), loud excited exclamations (from Alexei), and Bob letting out a girlish sounding squeal of excitement.
Bucky’s only addition to the noise was to say, “About damn time,” before he walked away and into the kitchen.
Yelena stood, pulling Kate to her feet as she did so. And then, without hesitation, took Kate’s hand and started leading her towards the hallway that led to her bedroom.
Then she paused for a moment and turned back to give the whole group as stern a look as she could manage while fighting off the uncontrollable smile that was threatening to surface.
“If anyone disturbs us, they should be prepared to lose a limb.”
Having made that dire pronouncement, she pulled Kate away, practically running from the room.
Behind them, the remainder of the team broke into a chorus of cheers, whistles, and slightly obscene commentary.
In the distance, the door of Yelena’s bedroom slammed shut.