Chapter Text
Dazai Osamu has three simple objectives in life.
1. Find his universe's Odasaku
2. Find his universe's weird little ginger doggy
3. End his own life
This shouldn't be difficult. Its an easy, three point mission, the most straightforward set of instructions even the most bone-headed idiot could work out.
And Dazai was no idiot.
So why. Why, why, why - did all three of these objectives so cruelly evade him?!
Dazai grunted under his breath as he crouched by the gutter, poking at the streaming water with a stick.
Sure, he'd failed to accomplish his task in every other universe that this version of him had been privy to since birth, and sure. In those universe's, he was older, quite possibly smarter, and armed with, in some cases, weird magical scientifically improbable powers. But that didn't mean anything!
Dazai Osamu, fourteen year old current street rat, had something no other universe had.
And that was. Well.
Nothing at the moment.
But he'd seen how every other universe played out! He knew his failures intimately, knew exactly how he'd managed to lose Odasaku in every universe, and he knew exactly how he would prevent it in this one.
After all, unlike the other weird messed up realities Dazai had peered into, this universe was normal.
There were no Mafias (well, none Dazai would be affiliated with...). No pirates or spirits or kitsunes. The Dazai of this universe was no more than simply a child prodigy with the miraculous ability to peak through the walls of reality and decipher the next correct move to make.
He was also homeless.
Dazai finally stood, stretching with a groan. He hadn't eaten in a while, and his muscles felt weak and weary. He'd planned ahead, yes, but he had a tendency to not account for his own personal needs in any situation. He didn't want to show up to his future smelly and gross though.
What a bad first impression.
He could just hurry up and kill himself now.
Maybe smash his head against that wall a couple times.
No, too painful.
He could blow his brains out with the gun he'd stolen.
Or hang himself from one of the flickering streetlights.
No, no, and no. He had a mission, he needed to complete it, exactly as planned.
Plus, in every other universe, attempting suicide at fourteen always led him to that man.
He shuddered, glancing around. It was evening, about seven hours since he'd slipped out of the house. He'd gotten a far distance, but he wasn't too worried about getting caught.
After all, every other version of him had gotten away at this age with ease. And he was better than them.
He began strolling at a leisurely rate, glancing around every now and again, despite knowing that it was too soon for him to catch a glimpse of either head of red hair.
It was quite boring, really. He knew he'd need to go south, to get to the area Chuuya and Odasaku should be, at least currently.
He'd have to take the bus, which was a disgustingly long walk, and an even more disgustingly long drive.
He entertained himself thinking up what they might be doing, in a world notably devoid of the Port Mafia and The Sheep. And all the other twisted organisations different versions of them were apart of.
Within Yokohoma, there were two schools Dazai had been feverishly researching since he was old enough to comprehend what his visions of the other worlds meant.
Yokohama Private Institute of Learning and Education - a fancy, prestigious school run by none other than Mori Ougai, and one Dazai would avoid vehemently.
And a run down public school close to the slums, considered a rival of YPILE (fondly nicknamed 'Yippee' by some) only because of the exceptional efforts of a select few students.
And that was where Dazai would pluck Chuuya from.
It wouldn't be an easy task, but he was confident in his abilities to woo someone he already knew so intimately.
Even if Chuuya didn't know him. Yet.
Would Chuuya be living with his parents? No, in every other universe Dazai had observed, Chuuya's parents were absent, whether Chuuya was taken away or sent away. He doubted fate would be so kind in this one.
Maybe reality had twisted Paul Verlaine into a kind, loving man who took Chuuya in out of the goodness of his heart.
Dazai snorted to himself, earning some strange looks from the stragglers still wandering at this hour.
Now that would be a sight.
He almost couldn't wait to see what cruelty would befall Chuuya in this universe. He'd seen the passion, anger, joy and grief all light up Chuuya's expressive features, in every universe but this one. He was thrilled to see the burning energy that had drawn every other Dazai like a moth to flame to this weird, incredibly short tempered little man.
And of course, Odasaku would be out there, doing good deeds.
It was a constant in every universe, his unwavering kindness. Dazai's chest felt hot with excitement at the thought of finally meeting him.
His stroll picked up pace into a unashamed skip as he neared the bus stop. Of course, he'd have to suffer a year or two of just him and Chuuya, before he's finally destined to meet his Odasaku, but he can accept that.
After all, there's a reason Chuuya is the second priority on Dazai's list.
Dazai could hardly contain himself as he skipped over the run down ticket machine and shoved a much too high sum of cash into the bus drivers hand. The man, who had been previously eyeing the suit-wearing bandaged teen with suspicion, simply snatched the money greedily, barely paying attention as Dazai clambered eagerly to a seat near the back of the bus.
He'd suffered through fourteen years of misery, fourteen years of nothing but watching through the window as his other selves foolishly lost Odasaku again and again.
He would not be so stupid.
Sure, the other version of him who'd also gotten a peak into exactly how important Odasaku was had very much not succeeded in keeping the both of them alive and certainly didn't have an actual relationship to speak of with the man, but this Dazai didn't need to do all that.
All he needed to do was find Chuuya, find Odasaku, make them his, and then die so that they may live happily forever.
There was no Mafia, no silly gangs or other rubbish to get in his way.
There were various other people of relative importance to the various other Dazai's, and he didn't doubt fate would bring him to some of them - if he lived that long. But they weren't his main priorities in this world, and they weren't the keys to his happy ending.
He would have Chuuya, to be his fire.
Odasaku, to be his warmth.
And the sweet embrace of death to be the cool bliss that would mark his success.
This universe would play out perfectly, all in the palm of Dazai's hand.
In the back of the bus, a young boy, wrapped in bandages and glee, smiled so frightfully, reality itself dared not look.
Dazai would not fail this time.
He would not fail this time.
-------
"Yo, dude, do you feel like someone's like... watchin' you... or something?"
Chuuya sighed, squinting up from the work he'd been pouring over. "Shirase, I told ya. I got homework I gotta-"
"Pssh. Dude, like. Whatever. We all know you're gonna ace everything anyway, but like." He leant in over the library's small table, lowering his voice. "I swear, I feel eyes on me or somethin'. Creepy as hell."
"Maybe you finally have an admirer." Chuuya deadpanned.
Shirase huffed, smacking the table. "Guess they were looking at you and I just got in their way then!" He laughed, peering at Chuuya's sheets. "Bleh, that looks insanely boring. Glad I don't have to do that."
"You're in this class too, idiot." Chuuya grinned, closing the books despite himself. He could always finish it later. He'd pull another all nighter if he had to. "Anyway, you wanted to hang out? Where's Yuan?"
"Dunno." Shirase scratched the back of his head, glancing around as he helped scoop up Chuuya's stuff. "Maybe she's the creep watching us. Yo, Yuan! You there?"
"Pssh, shut up dude, you're gonna get us kicked out!" Chuuya laughed, elbowing Shirase.
"We're leaving anyway." He rolled his eyes, walking confidently ahead with no doubt that Chuuya would follow. "C'mon, she's probably trying to shake some chips out of the vending machine."
After wandering around the almost empty school for a bit, they finally, finally found Yuan.
As Shirase predicted, half her arm was shoved up the vending machine.
"I finally convinced Chuuya not to stay behind at school like a nerd!" Shirase announced proudly. "He can buy us some snacks, c'mon."
"The fuck? When did I agree to-!"
"Oh my God, guys, do you also feel like someone's watching you?" Yuan asked, happily accepting her new method of chip aquiry and wrenching her arm from the machine.
"Yes! Yes!" Shirase's face lit up, shaking Chuuya's arm excitedly even as the boy merely sideyed the pair. "Someone is absolutely creeping around and spying on us. Oh my god. I bet its one of those Yippee creeps trying to work out how Chuuya's so smart- oh my god they're gonna-"
"Fuck off guys, you're just trying to prank me, aren't ya." Chuuya snorted as the trio moved through the school gates and out onto the crowded side walk.
Shirase and Yuan, and the rest of their friends, pulled stunts like this all the time. Trying to fire Chuuya up seemed like everyone's favourite pastime, lately.
"No way, Shirase is absolutely right." Yuan nodded sagely. "Chuuya we gotta protect you- or you gotta protect us- or, no. We gotta protect the goods! Quick! Shirase! Hide his homework! They can't know the secrets!"
"Fuck, you're right! What do we do, what do we-"
"Eat it! Eat it quick before anyone sees-!"
"Eugh! Stop it, you creeps!" Chuuya laughed, snatching his books from Shirase and shoving them in his bag. "Now I definitely know you're pranking me. You guys just want me to have to do all that work all over again."
"Nuh-uh, Sheep's honour." Yuan huffed. "Something fishy's going on. They're trying to steal our Chuuya away, take him to their side- I bet."
"I don't plan on going anywhere. Those Yippee fucks can suck my-"
"Uh. Guys."
Chuuya and Yuan glanced up from their bickering.
"So don't look now. But there might be a weird kid staring at us from across the road."
Chuuya and Yuan, both being fourteen and immune to subtlety, took that as an invitation to immediately spin around and glare across the street.
As Shirase said, there was a kid. A weird one at that.
He looked... uncomfortably out of place.
Besides just his attire, there was an air of wrongness about him.
Like he wasn't supposed to be there.
Like Chuuya wasn't supposed to see him.
Chuuya squinted. "That... that isn't Yippee's uniform, is it?"
Yuan popped a hand on her hip, unabashedly staring. "I don't think so. But it sure is fancy. What's with the bandages. What's with the- oh shit guys turn away he's coming over."
Despite Yuan's words, none of the three teens turned.
With unmatched coordination and teamwork such as that, surely they could best anything that came their way.
"GuyswhatshappeningI'mfreakingout-"
"Shirase shut the fuck up." Chuuya hissed under his breath. "Just act cool. Just be cool. He's like, not even looking at us."
He most certainly was looking.
Looking at Chuuya, specifically, like no one else in the world mattered.
Especially not the cars he was darting past with single minded focus.
It was almost uncomfortable, but Chuuya didn't dare break eye contact. He wouldn't be intimidated by a (possibly Yippee) bandaged weirdo.
Just. Mantain eyecontact. Yep.
Or, well. It was more like two eyes to one eye contact.
Did he have a second eye? Or was it just like, an empty, fleshy socket? Or maybe he had one of those cool glass eyes, like-
Fuck.
Apparently his second eye was incapable of sight as well, as the boy made no move to dodge the cars barrelling towards him as he practically sprinted across the road.
"Chuuya oh my God he's gonna-"
"Stop-!" Chuuya lunged forward, but it was too late. He was too far. There was a swerve, a bang.
Chuuya's feet froze, rooting himself in place. His body acted before his mind could catch up, intent on preserving his safety and not throwing himself into an active car crash like the dumbass intended on doing.
A million things happened at once, but Chuuya's ears were ringing too loudly for him to be fully aware.
Someone was screaming. Multiple someone's.
Yuan was clinging to his arm, eyes wide and terrified.
Shirase had a hand covering his mouth.
And Chuuya.
Chuuya stared dead forward as vibrant red blood pooled across the road. As the steadily arriving ambulance and police and civilians grew louder and louder.
He stared. And stared.
Even crushed on the road, the figure still looked so hauntingly out of place - in a way that made Chuuya's eyes itch and hands tremble.
It was strange. Uncomfortable.
No one's told what to do in a situation like this.
Call the ambulance? But they're already here. Look away? In the back of his mind, Chuuya wished he could. But his eyes, wide and horrified, were rooted to the spot.
A shadow fell over Chuuya as a new presence arrived behind the trio.
Tall and calm amongst the sudden chaos that had soiled the previously peaceful afternoon.
He didn't dare look up, but he caught glimpse of a white doctor's coat out of the corner of his eye.
"Oh no." A mournful, almost disappointed voice sighed. "What happened here?"